02x02 - Toy Palace/Sand Ho!

[bunniefuu]

[ Gasps]

[ Tommy giggling]

Tommy!

Oh, no, snookums

That's for cleaning up messes

Not making them.

Now, you play out here
will phil and lil

And before you know it,
it will be time for a nice nap.

Now, share, you two.

[ Doorbell buzzing]

Didi:
that must be

Charles, sr.
And chuckie.

It can't be done, didi.

It just can't be done.

Oh, now, charles

Don't be discouraged.

Everybody gets
potty trained

Sooner or later.

Not chuckie.
Not my son.

He'll be taking diapers to work
in his briefcase.

I've been reading all about
potty training in lipschitz

And it's really
quite simple.

So you just go off
and have a good weekend.

We'll take care
of chuckie

And make sure
he uses his

P-o-t-t-y.

His what?

Oh. Oh, yeah.

Well, okay,
but if there's any trouble

Call the hotel.

We won't have
any trouble.

We'll be fine.

All right.

Bye-bye, chuckie.

Be a good boy

For didi and stu, okay?

Use your potty.

Don't eat
any earthworms...

Bye, charles.

Or breathe
any noxious fumes...

Bye, charles.

Or drink
any radioactive waste...

Bye, charles.

My goodness, what a worrywart.

What is it?

I don't know.

Maybe it's a hat.

Naw, then what's
the rest for?

Maybe it's
a big mush bowl.

It's a potty.

You guys won't believe what

They're trying
to make me do.

What, chuckie?

Yeah, what?yeah, what?

They're trying to make me...

They're trying to make me...

Oh, I can't say it.

Tell us, chuckie.

They're trying
to make me use that

Instead of my diaper.

Naw, that can't happen.

Yeah, how's it going to fit
in your pants?

[ Sighing]

But they can't do that
to you.

They're doing it.

They call it
getting potty trained.

It's the worstest thing
that's happened to me

Since my mom put me
on the bottle.

What are you
going to do?

I don't know.

I've tried everything.

You could put a lot
of napkins in your pants

And use them
like a diaper.

I tried it.

You could poop
in your room

And hide it
in your toy box.

Tried it.

Maybe you could

Stop pooping altogether.

Tried it. It's no use.

No matter what I do, it looks
like I'm going to have to be...

Potty trained.

Angelica:
ha!

You little babies
really make me laugh.

First you cry for your mommies
every time you get a little wet

And now, finally, you get to go

Without them forever

And what do you do?

Chicken out.

What's the matter?

Little baby scared to be
without his diapers?

No, that's not it.

I'm not scared.

I just don't want
to be potty trained, that's all.

It's just not right.

Not right?!

Ha. That's a good one.

Don't you dummies know anything?

Everybody who's anybody
is potty trained.

Well, not me.

I'm never going to do it.

They can't make me.

I'm going to wear
my diapers forever

And nobody is going to stop me--
not my mom, not my dad

Not the present
of the benighted steaks--

Because i...

Chuckie?

I...

What's the matter, chuckie?

What's wrong?

I... I... I got to go.

[ Anguished cry]

Oh, dear, this is it.

Stu, hurry!

What, deed?

Get the potty!

Where?there!

Now what?

Put it down.

Not there.

Over here

In the bathroom.

Get me
a washcloth.

Help with his shoes.
Get his underpad.

Help me pull off his pants.

Not his shirt,
his pants!

Where's his
no more diapersbook?

Didi:hurry!
Now what, deed?

According to lipschitz

We're supposed to wait

Until he does
his business

Then give him
plenty of praise

So that he gets

The right idea.

We just wait?

That's what

The book says-- we just wait.

[ Sighing]

Stu:
hmm...

Got any fives?

[ Yawning]

Hey, chuckie,
are you okay?

Is it so much to ask, tommy?

Is it so much to ask?

I want things to stay
the way they've always been.

Come on, chuckie

Why are you acting
like such a baby?

If they're going to make
you do it anyway

Why don't you just

Go along with it?

Yeah, when it happens
to you guys

Maybe that's what
you should do.

Happens to us?happens to us?

Nah.nah.

Well, I guess
I don't have to go after all.

[ Peeing]

Uh-oh.

Thanks, honey.

Anytime, deed.

You know, stu

I just can't believe it.

Chuckie was standing
right next to the potty.

It was an accident.

Lots of kids haven't been
potty trained at his age.

Really? Like who?

Well, uh... Like me
for instance.

You? You mean
you weren't potty trained

When you were two?

Grandpa:
two?!

Shucks, we almost didn't get him
into the boy scouts.

Aw, pop...

Grandpa:
I remember the time

Me and the misses took the boys
cross country in the old...

Gee, chuckie, this potty
training stuff is tough.

I know. I know.

Yeah, I mean, how do you know
when you have to go?

What's it
feel like anyway?

I don't know.

That's really the hard part.

I mean, sometimes, I think
I have to go, but I don't.

Other times, I don't
think I have to go

And I do.

I really, really do!

[ Sighing]

Now I'm so confused.
[ Laughing]

R

Perhaps we should do for chuckie
what my mommy did for me.

Oh, no!

What's wrong, chuckie?

I don't know.

I thought I had to go,
and then I didn't.

Now I do.

Now I don't.

Do! Don't!

Do! Don't!

[ Screaming]

[ Laughing]

Oh, chuckie, you're funny.

Don't you know
going to the potty

Is what you have to do
when you get old?

If you don't know
how to do it

You can't never
go to school

Or drive a car
or join the army

Or none of that fun stuff.

I don't care.

As bob as my witness

I'm never going to use
that potty again!

Chuckie:
no. No, I don't want to go.

You can't make me...

No, no, no, no, no

No, no, no, no!

Oh, man!

Okay, chuckie

It's time to go.

The chair
is waiting for you.

But-but... I'm too young to go.

Not anymore.not anymore.

Is there anything
I can get for you, my son?

Any last requests for you?

But it's not right.

Not right, I tell you.

Don't let them
make me do it!

Now, don't be
being a baby, my son.

What's the little people think?

I'll try.

I'll try.
No!

No! No!

Not the chair!
Not the chair!

Wait! Listen

Listen, I'm only two!

[ Laughter]

Everybody's got to go someday.

[ Laughing]

No

Please, not that!

[ Screaming]

No!

[ Yells]

[ Panting]

Well, I really got to go.

[ Sighing]

[ Peeing]

Huh?

Didi, he did it!

He did it!

Did what, stu?

He got out of bed

All on his own

He came in here,
and he did it.

I'll say.

Bravo, chuckie.

Way to go, chuckie,
you little potty animal.

Aunt didi

I had a accident.

Oh, no!

Stu, hurry.
Angelica's wet her p.j.'S.

Not another one.

[ Bawling]

Didi:
come on, now.

[ Bawling]

Well...

[ Chuckling]

Like they say, "everybody
who's anybody is potty trained."

Yep, and I'm
a anybody now.

You sure are.

Betty:
say hello
to your new friend, kids.

Ooh.
Ooh.

I just knew they'd
love it, betty.

I got a purple one
for tommy.

You know, deed

These kids can never
get enough toys.

Come on. I'll get you
that ginger root extract.

Betty, did you read
lipschitz' column today?

It's about twins.

Didi, after what I've
been through with my two

I could write
an encyclopedia

On twins.

I'll take
reptar first

And you can
have him second.

No, I'll take
reptar first

And you can
have him second.

Mommy gave reptar to me, philip.

I believe she gave him to me,
lillian.

Na-ah. Me.

Na-ah. Me.

[ Grunting]

Lipschitz insists

That you have to give twins
some time apart.

Ah, horsepucky, deed.

Phil and lil were made
to be together.

They're like
triscuits and bean dip.

But if you don't give twins
enough time apart

The sibling rivalry
becomes too intense.

Too intense? Ha!

That's a good one, deed.

Phil and lil can't stand
to be away from each other.

[ Phil and lil screaming]

Well, I suppose
a little time apart

Every now and then
wouldn't hurt them.

So, dude,
do you really think

This painting thing
is a good idea?

I'm telling you,
chicks dig guys who paint.

Haven't you ever heard
of picasso?

Thanks for taking her.

I hope she'll be all right
without her brother.

She'll have
a wonderful time

With tommy and chuckie.

I hope you're right.

Time to say bye-bye, kiddo.

[ Raspberry]

[ Raspberry]

[ Snoring]

Didi:
tommy! Chuckie!

Someone's here

To see you.

Now, have fun,
sweeties

And be good
for grandpa.

[ Snoring]

Lil?

What?!

What happened to phil?

He's not here.

Well, uh, you wanna play
with my new reptar toy?

I'm glad he's not here.

He's just
a big old booger-brain.

I don't care

If I never
see him again.

You don't miss him?

Not me.

Not even a little?

Nope.

Not even
a teeny bit?

Nah.

You don't miss
your own brother

Who you
always play with

And who you always go
everywhere with

And who you never ever
been away from

In your whole life?

That's right.

[ Crying]

Ah, don't cry, lil.

There's got to be something
we can do to help.

What can we do?

What do you mean
what can we do?

We're lil's friends.

She's counting on us.

Chuckie,
you're right.

I am?

Yup. We're going
to find phil.

We are?

He's at my house.

We could go
and get him.

We could?

Let's do it.

Let's crawl farther

Than any baby's
ever crawled before.

Let's go all the way
to lil's house.

Aw, me and
my big mouth.

Boy, I'm sure glad
we got rid of lil.

She was no fun anyway.

Hey, wanna play a game?

I'll roll you the ball,
and you roll it back, okay?

Lil never liked
that game much either.

What do you
wanna do?

Ah, you're no fun, bill.

No, you're
the unfun one, bill.

Can't even argue!

You know what, bill?

I think I'm gonna go see
what lil's doing.

Okay, okay,
you don't have to beg.

You can come.

[ Humming]

How are we gonna
get past your mom?

Yeah, tommy.
She sees everything.

I got an idea.

Let's see, now.

One tablespoon
of ginger root extract.

Well, let's make it two,
just for a little extra flavor.

We made it.

Now we have to go
next door.

But, tommy...

What is it this time?

There are
two next doors.

I think
it's that one.

I think
it's that one.

Are you sure?

Are yousure?

It's that one.

How do you know?

'Cause it looks
like a choo-choo

When you turn it
upside down.

She's right.

Uh, I'm sorry.

I just don't see it.

Let's go.

Hey, bill

Do you think
lil's having lots of fun

Playing with tommy and chuckie?

'Course they miss me.

Why wouldn't they miss me?

Dude, this house

Would look totally k*ller
with a racing stripe.

Black and silver--
raiders colors.

Whoa.

Dude, that's righteous.

Oh, smooth move, larry.

Ah, dude,
you look like a smurf.

Oh, great.

What are we
gonna do now?

This fence is a million,
billion, zillion miles tall.

Well, can't say
we didn't try.

Let's go back and get
some nice cold... Ah!

Chuckie, you did it.

We can go under
the fence.

What about spike?

Sorry, spike.

You're too big.

Guess you
gotta stay behind.

Come on.

[ Grunting]

Okay, bill

Here's the plan.

You stand guard here,
and I'll go find lil.

Whoa!

[ Phil screaming]

My ribbon.

Never mind, lil.

We gotta find phil.
Come on.

Lil's ribbon.

Spike, you didn't.

Lil!

Lil, I'm sorry!

Oh, well, I guess
you better eat me too.

Come on, spike.

Make it quick.

Peh! Peh! Blech!

Hey, spike, you think
you can throw lil up?

I kinda miss her.

Hey, where you going?

Wait up!

Bill, what have you
done with phil?

He's gotta be
around here somewhere.

Wait for me! Dah!

Good thing we used
such cheapo paint.

It comes right off.

Ow!

Treslame.

Come on, spike.

Can't you just throw up
a little bit?

Poor lil.

Lil, if I'd have known
this would happen

You could have had reptar.

[ Sobbing]

No philip.

Phil?!

Phil?!

Phil?!

Hey, a nickel.

Tommy:
we looked everywhere.

You mean
we came all this way

And now
there's no phil?

I knew this
was a bad idea.

No more phil?

Who's gonna play with me?

We can play
with you, lil.

But who's gonna talk about stuff
before we go to sleep?

Well...

And who's gonna confuse mommy

When things get broken

So no one gets blamed?

Well...

And who's gonna argue with me

About what daddy's hair
is made out of?

[ Crying]

Betty:
oh, baby,
now, don't cry.

Mommy's coming.

Ah, poor little boy.

I know what's wrong.

You miss your sister,
don't you?

Well, don't worry, philly willy.

She's right next door.

Why's she
calling lil phil?

Oh, no, chuckie.

She thinks
lil is phil.

I knew from square one

This separation experiment
was a lousy idea.

Okay, philly,
let's go see your sister.

Come on, chuckie.

We better get
back home, quick.

You look like
swamp thing.

[ Laughing]

[ Laughing]

Phil.

What are you
doing here?

Tommy? Chuckie?

What did you do
with my lillian?!

[ Doorbell buzzes]

Didi:coming!
Quick!

Deed, lipschitz
can take a hike.

These two
belong together.

I'm telling you,
deed

Poor philly here
was screaming like a banshee.

Funny,
I didn't have

An ounce of trouble with lil.

She's been playing with tommy
and chuckie the whole time

And they've barely
made a peep.

If you had one of each,
you'd realize

How different
boys and girls really are.

How about
we ponder it

Over a cup
of hot java?

You have to try
my ginger chicken.

But there's too much ginger
and not enough chicken...

I thought
you were dog food.

I thought
you were disappeared.

This is yours.

I found it.

I hope we never lose
each other again.

Me too.

So, next time,
don't start a fight.

Me start a fight?

But, philip,
you started the fight.

No, you started it,
lillian.

No, you started it,
philip.

You did.

You did.

You did.

You did.
You did.

You.
You.

You.


You!