03x04 - Grandpa Moves Out/The Legend of Satchmo

[bunniefuu]

[ Snoring]

[ Gasps]

[ Kids laughing]

The spatula--

Stu, I need
the spatula today.

I'm using it,
deed.

The cutlets need flipping.

The hendersons will be here soon
and you're flipping cutlets?

Men!

Check it out--
my new flymaster

Terminator of
the undersea world.

Want to see me cast?

Didi:
that's nice, pop.

Humph!

Needs more of a kick,
if you ask me.

You don't need to...

This stuff will
really give it

That je ne sais what.

Oh, pop!

They're ruined!

Not necessarily.

Don't you think you've
helped enough already?

Well, stu appreciates
my culinary touch.

Ain't that right?

Sure, pop.

How about a little
orange juice

To liven up
that chicken?

Actually, i...

Pop, why don't you
just make a salad?

Fine.

Salad time,
eh, scout?

[ Shrieking]

Pop, maybe you
should take your
new bowling ball

And go watch tv.

Hey, spike,
how about a game of fetch?

Fine, have it your way.

Hello, I'm roberto mazatlan

For flushing waters
retirement center.

Flushing waters
is a wonderful home

Where senior citizens can
truly enjoy their golden years.

Hey!

Relax in loungers
of rich corinthian leather

Treat yourself to generous
portions in our fine dining hall

And if you're a fisherman

Head outside, where the fish
are always biting

In our private stream.

Private stream?!

Yes, private stream.

So why live
with ingrate children?

Come to flushing waters.

It's a fantasy come true.

See you later, folks.

Sure, pop.

A fellow like me

Is smart enough to know
when he's not wanted.

That's nice,
pop.

Don't pretend you
want me around.

I'm moving out.

Whatever you
say, pop.

Both:
moving out?!

Hey, stu, crazy weather
this week, huh?

I'll say.

Angelica!

Something terrible has happened.

Grandpa's disappeared.

I looked
everywhere--
under the bed

Behind the curtains,
even in spike's doghouse.

He's gone.

I know
where he is.

He's in the closet, isn't he?

Tommy, you're so silly.

Grandpa doesn't
live here anymore.

He moved out.

Moved out?!

When is he coming back?

Never, I guess.

He went to the tired center.

Tired center? What's that?

It's where old
people go to live

When they get tired.

Everyone has
big comfy beds

And they take
lots of naps.

Golly, it sounds
pretty luxurious, pop.

Yeah, great, we'll see you
in a couple of hours.

It sounds like
a ritzy joint.

I still think
he'd be happier
at home.

When we visit

We'll convince him
to come back.

Stu, remember, if
we push him too hard

He'll just get
more stubborn.

Come on, kids.

We're going
to visit grandpa.

Didi:
are you sure this is it?

Pop said it was just
like a country club.

Flushing waters,
this is it.

Hi, we're here
to see lou pickles.

Oh, I'm sorry, we don't
allow juvenile visitors.

But this is
my husband.

I meant the children.

They can be noisy
and disturb the residents.

These kids don't
cause trouble.

They just want to see
their grandfather.

Could we speak with the manager?

I am the manager!

We can't leave
the kids here.

Leave them with mildred

Our resident
surrogate grandmother.

Oh, I couldn't impose.

Honestly,
it's my pleasure.

I get extra ginger
snaps for this.

Well, in that case.

Here's his diaper bag.

There are toys and a book

A bottle, some formula,
phone numbers and a sweater.

Bye, tommy, mommy
will be back soon.

You be good for
the nice lady.

Okay, daddy.

[ Rings buzzer]

So this
is it?

Pretty snazzy, eh?

Snazzy
isn't the word.

It's beyond
snazzy, pop.

Yeah, it's
positively swank.

Come on, I'll give you a tour.

Now, watch out
for the loose board.

How would you kids
like to see pictures

Of mygrandchildren?

You're a grandma,
miss old lady, ma'am?

Oh, yes, I have
seven grandchildren.

This is doc,
and here's happy

And sneezy and grumpy and dopey

And bashful, and, er,
I always forget the seventh one.

Sleepy?

Now that
you mention it

I could use a little nap.

[ Snoring]

She must be tired.

That's why she's
in a tired center, silly.

Now, let's
go find grandpa.

, , ,

, ,
Heh, heh, heh.

Angelica, is everyone
in the tired center

A grandma
or a grandpa?

Hmm, I guess.

So lots of kids have grandpas

Who can't play
because they're tired.

So?

So if the old people
weren't so tired

They could go
home and play

And everyone have their
grandpas and grandmas back.

So all we got to do...

Is wake up all
the old people!

Wake up,
mr. Someone else's grandpa.

Wake up!

Angelica, it's not working.

He must be really tired.

Hmm...

Don't worry,
I know what to do.

Ta-da!

This is it, pop?

This is the
activity center?

Something
wrong with it?

I just thought

There might be
a little more...

Activity.

Let me tell you
something, sonny.

You got to look
far and wide

To find cribbage
players like these.

My mommy
always says

There's nothing
like a cold shower

To wake you up in the morning.

I don't know,
angelica, maybe...

Don't submerge, admiral,
I'm still on deck.

Hey, you're not the admiral!

Run, tommy, run.

Grandpa:
best pork
and beans

In the state, I'd say.

What about that
french cuisine

You were
telling us about?

The french?
I use their food for bait.

Give me good old american
pork and beans any day.

Pop, I agree with you.

This food is wonderful.

Well, I'm full.

That there coffee
is what big people drink

To get waked up.

Alls we got to do

Is add the stuff in that can
to this water

And we got coffee!

I'll climb up there and get it.

I got an idea!

Grandpa:
a private fishing creek--
a lifelong fantasy.

This isn't
exactly a creek.

Where do the
fish come from?

Well, actually they're, uh...
Well, purchased.

Purchased?

They buy the fish

And put them in
this pond thing?

I guess you could say that.

So you come with
your fishing rod...

Net, actually.

Net?

The fish are
kind of expensive.

We're supposed to net them
and then put them back.

Now, let me get
this straight.

You just dip
a net into a pool

Of store-bought fish?

Sounds great!

Don't knock it.

I'm more active
than I ever was

Bottled up at home

I'll tell you that.

[ Screaming]

Whoa!

Hey, this is fun!

Well, pop, I think
you're doing great here.

So do i.

Me too.

Oh, come on,
now, pop.

Oh, pop, please
come home.

No, I'm a
retired old man

And this is
where I belong.

Whee!

Say, didn't those kids
speeding by

Look just like
tommy and angelica?

Yeah, they sure did.

All:
tommy and angelica?!

[ Screaming]

[ Shrieks]

[ Fire alarm ringing]

[ Screaming]

Grandpa,
you saved us!

Gosh, I missed
you sprats.

Without you, life's
just plain boring.

Mr. Pickles,
I'm sorry.

After all the problems
your visitors caused

You must leave flushing waters.

Leave flushing waters?

You hear that, scout?

I'm coming home.

Yippee!

We're sorry if we
were insensitive.

We'll try
harder, honest.

Really
they will.

What do you say?

You forgive us?

Oh, I suppose so.

Grandpa:
stu, I got
to go back.

Stu:
but pop, I thought
you were coming home.

I am, but I left my
car and all my stuff

Back at the
retirement center.

I don't know, tommy.

I don't think

This camping is
such a good idea.

Camping out is
great, chuckie.

We'll get to
sleep on rocks

And have bugs
crawl all over us

And get wet when it rains.

You only think of
the fun part, tommy.

What if something bad happens?

You always think something
bad is going to happen to us.

Tommy, in case you forgot

Something bad
always doeshappen to us.

Well, not this time.

Grandpa's
with us.

Hey, what the...

I don't know.

I got this
strange feeling

That somebody's
watching us.

Watching us?

That's crazy
talk, chuckie.

Who could be
watching us?

Aw, their
first camp-out.

How exciting!

I'm worried about leaving
them in the wilderness.

Stu, it's only
the backyard.

With that false sense
of security

You forget to
take precautions

Against grizzlies and
freak mountain storms.

I don't think there
are bears here, stu.

That's exactly what
they want you to think.

"I went to the woods because
I wished to live deliberately

"To see if I could not learn
what life had to teach

And not when I came to rest
discover that I had not lived."

You see, old hank thoreau
was saying life's too short

To spend sitting
watching cartoons.

I thought
I'd bring out

The first aid kit.

I hope you're not
reading anything scary.

That all depends.

It might be scary
if you're years old

And you suddenly realize
that you've never really lived.

Are you sure about
this whole camping experiment?

Just because you had one
teensy-weensy bad experience

In the woods

Doesn't mean you have
to wreck it for everyone.

Teensy-weensy!

I was lost for three days.

Stu, that was over a year ago.

Isn't it about time
you put it behind you?

Fine, pop, have it your way.

See that bright shiny band
up there, sprouts?

That's the milky way.

And that's
the big dipper.

Angelica:
the big diaper?

And that, of course,
is the north star.

If you ever
get lost

Look for
the north star

And you can find
your way home.

Old stu had to find
that out the hard way.

Well, time to hit the hay.

If you hurry,
I might have time

For one of my favorite
camping stories.

You sprouts ever hear
the legend of sasquatch?

Of course not

Because I haven't
told it to you.

Well, they say
sasquatch was feet tall

With big round eyes, long teeth

And huge furry feet.

Some folks
call him bigfoot.

Some call him
the abominable snowman.

The rest just call him "sir."

On warm nights
just like this

He used to come
out of the hills

And turn whole
villages upside down

Looking for ice
to stay cool

Or maybe just looking
for trouble.

Don't worry, though.

They say he only comes down
from the hills every years.

Wait a minute.

Hasn't it been exactly years
since the last time he was seen?

What am I boring you sprouts
with all that yapping for?

You're probably
ready to fall asleep.

[ Yawns]

[ Snoring]

Tommy...

What is it,
chuckie?

Dust bowl, schmust bowl,
I ain't moving to california.

Tommy, I just knew

Something bad was
going to happen.

What do you mean?

That big furry monster

Your grandpa was
telling us about.

What'd your grandpa call him?
The satchmo?

What if he comes
to get us?

I swear, you babies
will believe anything.

There ain't no satchmo monster.

Grandpa made him up.

Then what's that behind you?!

Hey, what's going on?

Did I startle you, pop?

I'm sorry.

I was passing by.

Everything
all right?

Everything would be fine

If certain people would stop
coming by and scaring us.

Well, if looking out
for my family's welfare

Is a crime these days

Then I guess
I stand guilty as charged.

Good night!

Passing by?

Didi:
I'm sorry about what
happened last summer

But this isn't manitoba

It's our
backyard.

The kids
will be fine.

I don't know.

I should check on them.

Stu, not again.

Go to sleep and soon
it will be morning

And we can all go on
with our lives.

All right.

What if there's
a flash flood?

Stu, go to sleep.

[ Snoring]

Hey, tommy, I got to go potty.

Tommy, are you awake?

I really got to go.

That's good, chuckie.

[ Sighs]

I guess I'm on my own.

There's no such thing
as satchmo...

There's no such thing
as satchmo...

There's no such thing
as satchmo...

There's no such thing
as satchmo...
There's no such thing as...

[ Screams]

It's just a silly tree.

Phew, I made it.

Hey, you guys.

I heard something.

Where's chuckie?

I don't know.

I bet he's gone

To look for the satchmo.

Wow!

What a brave baby!

He might be in trouble.

We got to find him.

Hey, where
you going?

To find chuckie.

He's looking for the satchmo.

Chuckie look for the satchmo?

That's a good one.

Chuckie's scared of the
guy on the oatmeal box.

He'd nevergo look for satchmo.

Well, he went somewheres
and we got to find him.

Well, good luck

And watch out for the satchmo.

Satchmo.

I'll show themsatchmo.

Chuckie!

Chuckie!

Chuckie!

Where are we?

I don't know.

It all looks so different
in the dark.

We're lost!

No, we'll find our way back
by the north star.

Phil:
wow, there sure
is a lot of stars.

Which one is the north star?

I don't know.

They all
look the same.

Tommy, if chuckie
were here

I think he'd have
something to say.

What's that?

We're doomed.

There's nothing
to be ascared of.

Ooga-ooga!

All:
satchmo!

[ Laughing]

Angelica!

Why'd you scare us like that?

How could I resist?

I'm only human.

Ah, boy, that's better.

Who turned out the lights?

Uh-oh, I'm doomed.

Tommy?

Tommy!

[ Rustling]

Oh, no, I'm going to get
eated by the satchmo!

[ Rustling]

[ Screaming]

Tommy!

Am I glad to see you.

We must be a zillion
miles from the tent.

There it is.
It's really him.

Probably angelica
trying to scare us.

Yeah, it's
probably me

Trying to scare you.

All:
satchmo!

Tommy:
where'd he go?

He's probably waiting
for us to come back to the tent.

Then he'll have us
where he wants us.

Maybe the satchmo isn't bad.

Maybe he's just lonely
and wants to talk.

And maybe the boogeyman
wants to give you presents.

Think, tommy,
didn't you see him?

He's got
big hairy feet

Long teeth
and hair all over his face.

What would
he want to talk about?

We got to get
out of here.

Look.

That door's stuck.

I'll fix this one of these...

It's satchmo.

And he's after mommy and daddy!

Stupid window.

[ Hollering]

Come on.

We got to save
my mom and dad.

[ Screaming]

Where's chuckie?

The satchmo
got him.

We got to help him.

[ Screams]

Angelica:
uncle stu!

What are you kids
doing out here?

We couldn't sleep
because of the satchmo.

Satchmo? The trumpet player?

No, the monster.

I knew this was a bad idea.

And didi tried to tell me...

Monster?!

What in tarnation is going on?

Angelica says there's
somebody called satchmo.

The trumpet player?

No, the monster.

Where do you suppose
she got thatidea?

Search me.

Probably
something on tv.

I think this proves

That camping out is
not a good idea.

I think it proves that
watching tv is not a good idea.

Why don't we all go inside
our nice safe house

And get some sleep?

Stu, I got a better idea.

This is exciting out here
in the middle of nature.

It's almost primal.

Now I'm experiencing
the real stu pickles.

Uncle stu?

Yes, angelica?

Here I feel
we can reallycommunicate.

Go to sleep.