06x02 - Bud Branches Out

[bunniefuu]

(suspenseful music)

- [Announcer] Robert Young,

(cheerful music)

and Jane Wyatt,

(children laugh)

with Elinor Donahue, Billy, Gray, and Laurin Chapin,

in Father Knows Best.

- I just can't believe you're starting off to college today.

Seems like only yesterday we were trying to get you

to the fifth grade.

- Yeah, I know.

Well, I gotta run, Dad, or I'll be late for registration.

- Ah, I really should, uh, give you a big lecture

on this occasion, a lot of sage advice.

- Well, could you spare me that?

(father laughs)

- I'll have to, I've already told you everything I know.

Just, uh,

uh,

be sure to get off to a good start.

- Yeah, I will, Dad.

- I still say that youought to branch out more

in the courses than you're planning to.

I know you're taking apre-engineering course,

but, remember, the successful engineer today

also needs to know languages, economics,

philosophy, the humanities.

- Yeah, uh, I know,Dad, I really don't need

all this advice.

What I, uh, what I do need is a $ loan.

(audience laughs)

- $ !

I thought you had enough for your fees, and books and all.

- Oh, I, I do have.

But I also have a tireon my car that's so thin

I could puncture with a sharp marshmallow.

(audience laughs)

(father laughs)

- Well, okay.

But this is just a loan!

If this money demand keeps up,

I may have to go to college myself

and take a course in counterfeiting!

(audience laughs)

- Thanks, Dad.

Well Mom, I'm off, wish me luck!

- Now do you have everything you need?

A pencil?

- Yes, mother dear, I have a pencil.

I'm not enteringkindergarten, you know.

- No, but this is a big step.

Oh, I still wish Betty could go with you

and help you register.

- But I don't need Betty to help me.

- No, but remember what I told you.

Be sure and put downthe right course numbers

when you register.

They don't go by the names of the course,

they go by the numbers,it's faster that way.

- I don't need, I don't need you to tell me all that.

- Okay, but it's very easy to get mixed up.

They rush you throughthat line like sausages

on a conveyor belt.

- Oh, Betty, couldn't you go with him and make sure

he gets the right classes?

- No, seniors don'tregister till tomorrow.

It's just the freshmen today.

This is their, uh, orientation day.

- Now dear, are you sure you're gonna be warm enough?

- Oh, do you have your key? - Yeah.

- Now, wait a minute, that's my notebook.

- Call me, I'd be right-- - Hold it, hold it!

Look, if I don't get there, they won't even let me in.

Bye!

- Have a good time!- Have a good day, Bud.

- Bye-bye, Bud!

(father laughs)

- Does anybody have a pencil?

(audience laughs)

- Why do I keep feeling that something will go wrong today?

- Because it will.

That's one solid thing about good ol' Bud.

You could always depend on him to to goof something.

(people chatter)

- [Female Registrar] Joyce Kendall.

- [Male Registrar] Joyce Kendall?

- Say, I'm next, you know?

(typewriter clacks)

- A guy's gotta be fast around here.

- Yeah, at this rate we'll graduate halfway through

our freshman year.

- Yes.

- James Anderson.

- James Anderson.

- Uh, junior.

- You're a junior?

But this is for freshmen.

- Oh, I, I am a freshman,

but I'm a junior.

I mean that's my name.

James Anderson freshman, junior.

- Your assigned class is filled,

you'll have to take either or .

That'll give you a conflict with your here.

You can't change that without dropping .

- What?

- Well you'll have to go back to the beginning of the line

and see Mr. Simmons.

- Yes sir.

(playful music) (audience laughs)

- Sorry.

- [Female Registrar] Claude Messner.

- [Male Registrar] Claude Messner.

(gentle music)

- [Joyce] Bud!

- [Claude] Over here!

- Oh, hi.

Boy, am I b*at.

Boy, Betty was right about them running us through

like a bunch of sausages.

I feel like I've been through the grinder.

- Are your classes all set now?

- Well, finally, yeah.

- Oh, let's see if we have any classes together.

- Hm?

Well, I think the only one would be Freshman English,

unless you're taking Engineering.

- My English class is and yours is , darn it.

(bell rings)

- What's that for?

Fire drill?

Somebody set fire to the place already?

I hope.

- No, we're supposed to go to our classes

and meet our teachers and get oriented.

Didn't you read the instructions?

- Oh, hey Joyce, wait.

Uh, after we're throughbeing, uh, oriented,

why don't we, uh, go down to the malt shop

and have a lotus blossom malt?

- Okay, I'll meet you right here.

- Okay.

- Well, come on, let's go meet the monsters.

What's your first class?

- Trigonometry.

(students chatter)

(suspenseful music)

This is amazing!

All the girls in here.

- Haven't you ever seen girls before?

- Sure.

It just seems strange that girls will be taking

a course like,

hey, hey, hey, look at that.

- Yeah, man.

(cheerful music)

(playful music)

- Say, is that the teacher?

- Sure, why do you think I signed up for this course,

to learn something?

- Bonjour, ladies and gentlemen.

Welcome to my class.

I hope we will all have a wonderful time together

this semester.

- Man, you know it.

- My name is Miss Louvois,

Jeanette Louvois.

Jeanette

Louvois.

Soon I shall know all of your names,

and perhaps we shall learn to speak our names in French

as well as in English.

- This is a French class?

- Sure, what did you think it was,

trigonometry or something?

(audience laughs)

- First, we must make surethat we are in the right class.

Sometimes, with all the rush-rush on freshman day,

we do make mistakes.

So, take your registrationcards and see if you have listed

for the first period course number ,

(speaks in a foreign language).

This is Elementary French.

Now, is there anyonewho should not be here?

You?

You are not staying with me?

Tsk, oh, I am disappointed.

Here, let me check to make positive.

- Well, no, never mind, I'm, uh,

I've got , I'm staying.

(audience laughs)

- Well I'm glad.

I would not want to lose so handsome a French student.

(audience laughs)

- College Algebra, English Composition,

Elementary French, Mechanical,

French!

- French, you weren't gonna take French.

Oh, I know.

You got mixed up and got in the wrong class after all,

didn't you?

- No, no, of course not!

I just got to thinking about what Dad said about

branching out.

What is it, is it a crime to take French,

you want me to drop it?

- Oh, no, no, it's fine!

It's just that, well we didn't think

you were planning on it.

- What teacher do you have for it?

- Teacher, I, uh,

I don't know, uh,

some woman, I wasn't paying too much attention.

Well, I gotta get studying.

- Studying, already?

- Yup, Dad wants me to get off to a good start in college.

Thank you.

- [Betty] Oh, by the way, your girlfriend Joyce called you

a couple of times.

- What, Joyce?

Oh, oh yeah, I forgot about her.

(audience laughs)

- Did Bud ever buy that tire for his car?

- I doubt it.

He's been too busy all week,

studying French.

That still seemsa mystery to me.

It's sudden to see him to study French.

- Oh, the only mystery is that he actually took my advice

about branching out and, uh.

(Bud whistles) (audience laughs)

- Uh, come on, Betty, ifyou're coming with me,

let's ramble.

- Wait, I just started to eat.

- Well hurry up, I'll, uh, go start the car.

- Miss Louvois's in love with you?

Oh, you're out of your mind, boy.

- Oh, I don't know.

You should see the way she looks at me in class,

and the way she says my name.

James.

(audience laughs)

And sometimes it's

Jacques.

That's French for James.

- So what?

That doesn't make her in love with you.

And even if she was, she's too old for you.

- No, no, no, she isn't.

I found out she's just a student herself.

- Yeah.

- Well, a graduate student working for a Ph.D.

So, uh, maybe she's a few years older than I am.

Besides, French women are ageless.

- They may be ageless, but they get awfully old.

- She loves me not.

Well, what's a few years when it's,

when it's the real thing?

And this is.

I, I knew it the minuteI laid eyes on her.

Gee, if I'd, uh, known how wonderful college was,

I woulda started years ago.

- [Joyce] Bud?

- She loves me.

- Watch it, Jacque.

- She loves me not. - Here comes Joyce.

- Hi, Joyce.

- Um, are you going to be busy after school today?

- Uh, gee, uh, I'm afraid so.

I got an awful lot of homework to do.

- [Joyce] Seems like that's all you've been doing lately.

- Yeah, I know.

Well I've got some pretty tough courses.

I better not, uh, figureon seeing you today.

Maybe, uh, next week.

- Oh.

Well, whatever you say.

See you later.

- Yeah, so long, kid.

- Kinda giving her the brush, aren't ya?

- No, not really.

I still like her.

She's a good kid.

She's, uh, just seems so, uh, so young,

so immature.

- That's the way I like 'em.

(audience laughs)

Well, I gotta get to class.

See you at the cafeteria.

- She loves me not.

Huh, no, no, I can'teat with you today, Dan.

Uh,

I found out what time and at which table Miss Louvois eats.

And, by some odd trick of fate,

that's exactly where I'm going to eat.

- I see.

May I say, Jacques, old boy, you're a bit of a jerk?

(audience laughs) (playful music)

Good luck.

(playful music)

(audience laughs)

- Oh! (Miss Louvois gasps)

Excuse me.

Why, Miss Louvois!

- Jacques, my prize student.

Won't you join me?

- Uh, if you're sure you don't mind.

- Of course not.

It would be a pleasure, please do.

- Thank you.

(speaks in a foreign language)

(Miss Louvois laughs)

- Oh, that accent (laughs).

(dishes clatter)

Oh, you are nervous.

You have been studying too hard, no?

- Well, yes, I have.

Oui.

(audience laughs)

- Well, one must study, yes,

but one should also enjoy college.

- I,

I am enjoying it.

In fact, I've never enjoyed anything as much as

being in your class.

- Why, that is the nicest thing anyone has said to me

since I have started teaching French.

- Hey, what's going on here?

- Ah, Betty!

Won't you join us?

This is one of my new students, Jacques.

- [Betty] I've met him,he's my little brother.

- So this is your little brother.

- We've been wondering why he's been

studying his French so avidly.

Now I understand.

- Well I think he hasbeen studying too hard.

You should take better care of your little brother.

(audience laughs)

- Sis, scram, will ya?

(audience laughs)

(playful music)

- Honey, don't we have any, oh.

- I found it, here's her picture.

- Wow!

That's a teacher?

- Probable, too, your hairdo.

Oh I just hope he doesn't flunk all his other subjects

while he's concentratingso hard on French.

- Well, perhaps, uh, I better go down there and, uh,

have a talk with her.

- You do and don't be surprisedif the sugar on your oatmeal

tastes a little like ground glass.

(father laughs) (audience laughs)

(playful music)

(mother and father laugh) (audience laughs)

- Claude!

Wait a minute.

I wanna talk to you.

Um,

well I want you to levelwith me about something.

- Yeah?

About what?

- Bud.

Does he have another girl?

- Girl?

Well, no, I wouldn't say he's got another girl, no.

- Well, something's sure wrong.

He hardly knows I'm alive.

And I can't pin him down long enough to find out anything.

(gentle music)

Well, do you think he'd come to dinner at my house

if I invited him?

- You'd have to check with him.

- Well, I've gotta get him someplace

where I can talk to him.

I can't go on like this any longer.

He has French this firstperiod, doesn't he?

Thanks.

- Poor kid.

That's the worst place you could've picked to find him.

- Pardon.

- Oh, Miss Louvois, excuse me, I was looking for Bud.

- For Bud?

- James Anderson.

- Ah, oui, Jacques.

Well he's probably here, he's always the first one.

Such a studious boy.

No, I do not see him.

- Well,

um, well, I hate to bother you, but would you mind

giving him a note for me?

- But of course not.

(bell rings)

- Oh dear, I have to run.

Well I'll just have to catch him later.

- Uh, could I write it for you?

- Would you? - Um-hm.

- Oh, so, just say,

Dear Bud, will you please come to dinner

at my house Friday night.

And sign it J, he'll know, and thank you so very much.

(playful music)

- The verb to go is aller.

(Miss Louvois speaks in a foreign language)

Well, that's all we have time for today.

Tomorrow we continue with(speaks in a foreign language).

So until the (speaksin a foreign language).

(bell rings)

(audience laughs)

Oh, Jacques, this is for you.

(books clatter)

(audience laughs)

- For me? - Oui.

You be sure and answer please.

Never keep a lady waiting.

(playful music)

Dear Bud.

- Well that's the first time she's called me Bud.

(audience laughs)

- [Miss Louvois] Will you come to dinner

at my house Friday night?

Signed, J.

- Wow.

J.

J.

Jeanette.

You,

you creature.

- Man, have you flipped completely?

(audience laughs)

- Oh hey, Claude, come here.

It's happened.

I thought Betty had ruined my chances with Miss Louvois,

but she loves me.

Here, look at this note she wrote.

Oh, don't touch it!

Just read it.

- It doesn't sound likemuch of a love note.

- Well you shoulda heard the tone of voice she wrote it in.

(audience laughs)

"Dear Bud,

"will you come to dinner?"

Well, anyway, I'm in, Dan.

- Oh, do you know where she lives?

- Are you kidding?

I walk by there a hundred times a night.

Only trouble is Joyce is practically right nextdoor,

and I'm always afraid she'll see me.

- Oh, did Joyce find you?

She was gonna invite you to dinner, too.

- Yeah?

Well, it's too late now.

I'll just have to tell Joyce the truth.

Hey, why don't you start going with her?

She's a wonderful kid.

- Not a bad idea.

- Well, I gotta go answer this note.

Never keep a lady waiting, haha.

Dear

Miss Louvois.

No, too formal.

(gentle music)

Dear

Jeanette.

Hmm.

Too dull.

How would Maurice Chevalier write it?

Hey, that's it.

I'll write it in French,the language of love.

Yeah, here we are.

(gentle music)

(speaks in a foreign language)

(students laugh)

- Well our time is up again, too bad.

(audience laughs)

Tomorrow we will study (speaks in a foreign language).

(bell rings)

(playful music)

What is this?

- It's the, the answer to the note.

- Ah, the answer, ha.

Very good.

- [Student] Miss Louvois, I wanted to ask you something

about tomorrow's assignment.

- [Miss Louvois] Yes?

- Miss Louvois!

Did you give Bud my note yesterday?

I haven't heard a word from him.

- I not only gave it to him, but I have already his answer.

- Oh, thank you.

You're so nice to do this for me.

It's in French!

(audience laughs)

I can't read it, what does it say?

- Well we shall see.

Mmm.

Oh my (laughs).

The grammar, it is very bad,

but very romantic.

(audience laughs)

(speaks in a foreign language), my dear,

I live suspended until Friday night.

I will fly to thee on (laughs),

on garlic of love.

- Garlic?

- Oh, he meant wings.

Garlic is spelled A-I-L,

wing is spelled A-I-L-E.

On wings of love.

Till Friday night,

(speaks in a foreign language).

- It's sure mushy.

Do you think he's all right?

- Oh, he's fine.

And the mushy, uh, don't knock it.

(audience laughs)

You're lucky to have such nice boy.

Don't let anyone take him away from you.

- Oh, I won't.

And thank you again.

* Alouette, gentille alouette

* Alouette, je te plumerai

* La la la

* La la la

* Ahhh

* Ahhh

* Laaa ahhhh

(Bud yawns)

- I hear you have a date tonightand won't tell who it is.

Wow!

Are these for the date, when did you get so rich?

- I'm not.

I used the money that Dad loaned me

to buy the tire for my car.

- Such extravagance.

Anybody would think you were dating somebody like, uh,

Miss Louvois.

- Well, maybe I am.

- That's preposterous, come on, tell me,

who is your date?

- No, it's true, sis.

Only, don't tell anybody, not even the folks.

Obviously, Jeanette and I

have got to keep this quiet for now.

But it's the real thing.

* La ra ta ra ra

* Ra ra laaa

(Bud sneezes)

(audience laughs)

* Doo dee rum tum dee dee da

* Ta ra

* Loo dee da da

(gentle music)

(doorbell rings)

- Gordon.

You are late, you naughty boy.

Oh, what beautiful flowers.

Entre.

(tense music)

Oh, Jacques, I thought I recognized you.

How are you?

(audience laughs)

- Thought she recognized me?

Why'd she play such a dirty trick on me?

That,

that,

old woman!

(tire blows out)

(air hisses)

(playful music)

Oh, this is all I need.

- Oh, flat tire.

You poor boy.

- Oh, hi Joyce.

- I wondered why you were so late, so I thought

I'd come out and see ifI could see you coming.

But then I couldn't figure out why you'd parked here

in front of MissLouvois's place.

- Yeah, it was a pretty dumb thing to do all right.

- You need some help?

- No, I can do it.

Uh, what'd you mean, uh,wondered why I was late?

- (grunts) Well it doesn't really matter,

Mother just didn't know whetherto put the steaks on or not.

- Steaks?

- Yeah, we're havin' everythingyou like best because,

well, it just had to be anextra-special dinner after that

lovely note you sent me.

- Note?

- (grunts) Of course I couldn't read the French.

Miss Louvois translated it for me.

- Miss Louvois translated?

- Yeah, she certainly is nice, isn't she?

Taking all the trouble to

give you my message and all.

- Giving me your message?

Ohhh.

- Well, what's the matter, Bud?

You act like you don't know what I'm talking about.

- Oh, I,

I have moments when I'mnot too smart, Joyce.

(audience laughs)

Boy.

(Joyce grunts)

Here, let me do that.

That's man's work.

- Oh.

Well, uh.

Oh, uh.

(gentle music)

You know, Bud,

until you sent me that lovely note, well,

I was afraid you didn'tlike me any more.

- I, uh, I,

well, here, I've got something that will show you

just how I feel about you.

(Joyce gasps) (audience laughs)

- Bud, they're beautiful!

Oh, you shouldn't have.

So pretty.

How do you say flowers in French?

- French?

No, you're asking the wrong boy.

I'm dropping that class, I'mswitching back to trigonometry.

- Oh?

- Yeah, I've decided I'll make a better American engineer

than a French lover.

(audience laughs)

For you.

You look so nice.

And, uh, and young.

(audience laughs)

(audience applauds) (gentle music)

(cheerful music)

(arcade-like music)