oh I thought you were on a date yeah I
was but I Kevin brought his teenage son
Jordan again so we went to the play zone
otherwise known as the really good
chance of stepping in puke so I've
thrown up there all weekend long he's
got son you know joint custody may be
good for the kids but nobody considers
how it affects the new girlfriend any
idea on how to ditch a third wheel once
I figure it out you'll be the first to
know only the little looser Jordan had
some friends his own age but I could
have some alone time with Kevin hey mom
hi my sign somewhere not without
checking it first to see if it's right
by it it's fine okay or you know I was
thinking how would you like to spend a
little girls night out next Saturday
just you me and a couple guys don't know
you mean like a double date think of it
as a family tradition your mother and I
used to double-date with Adalind and how
you are as with your children and your
children's children so what's this guy
like okay well his name is Jordan and
he's a kid and your kid and look you're
not trying to get married i am come on
please okay great let's go find you an
outfit it'll make Jordan want to spend
some time with you so I can spend some
time with Kevin we are gonna keep an eye
on our right of course don't die you and
Jordan be bad and sneak off when I say
the word mom where's the peanut butter
oh we're all out we're out of peanut
butter mom I need peanut butter how am I
supposed to study for a test without
peanut butter and this is the PSAT
sounds more like the pms 80 this is not
a joke the PSAT prep Smee for the NCT
which preps me for college which perhaps
me for the day you move out in the air
hockey table moves in
also not let's go right why are you
freaking out about this because Hakim
and I took the practice test last night
and he wiped the floor with me my study
guards aren't cutting it I need a
private tutor private tutor I saw that
movie Judy Brian and I need one of those
well see you cut it out you we can't
afford a tutoring you I'm throwing away
that tape good luck finding it if I take
the PSAT I'll end up going to state
school or worse cook community college
if you really think you need the extra
help then why don't you get a job and
pay for the tutor yourself where well
Billy you said that they need help down
at work right oh I don't know you can't
just walk in off the street and sell
toilets I think I'll be able to keep up
okay mr. big sh*t but the last kid who
walked in with that attitude couldn't
cut it last of the summer then ran back
to Harvard with his tail between his
legs
[Applause]
[Music]
sunstone orientation yeah the shown in
the ropes I'm so glad they hired us a
lackey stock rooms a mess was my turn to
shovel it out doctor says I'm not
supposed to lift anything heavier than a
beer aholic hag to Carl's party last
week a keg is a beer ah there's my boy
and a Berenson's training vet have the
orientation go into two hours and it
seems like a waste of time a waste of
time you get paid for or otherwise known
as a job coming up on the most important
part of your work day oh yeah almost
break time you guys wants to help me
study for the PSAT I brought my flash
card no no no you're not supposed to
study on your break that's like reading
a book on vacation even a book see the
patio department still has their
hammocks up you can't skip break but I
just have so much to do and you do it
all so much better if you rested and
relaxed I mean look at me I may look
like a lazy lion sunning himself on a
rock when a stray wanders from the herd
I'm ready to pounce watch this I help
you yeah I won't return his flow cup
it's too big for my t*nk sure no problem
I don't know if this little thing won't
fit in your t*nk I can imagine how small
your toilet must be this is the toilet a
toilet spoken like a man who's never
purchased on one of these bad boys it's
nude plus-size models like the chair way
to head to protest right
remember it's a showroom not a go room
oh this is roomy well I gotta have this
you just relax I'll start the paperwork
wow that kind of wanted to refund and
you just sold them a brand new toilet so
so all that time you spent sitting on
the couch you're just recharging to be
kick-ass salesman God gave me a gift you
know some people are lawyers or doctors
or scientists at the end of the day they
all need toilets thanks big guy no thank
you there's my men home from work Brian
how's your day it was great my boss even
assigned me to reorganize the stockroom
tomorrow yep the boy got the nod I've
never seen a new be picking up so fast
come on buddy time for a couple of
well-deserved beers and whatever you
want hey where's mark all right what's
going on Thanks don't need a reason to
see my favorite niece hey you said I
never got to ask you how you should it
off with the Jordan the other night
sorry well wow you really like you do
you think you'd like to go out with him
again I guess great there you go right
now their way in the car we got
reservations at eight I know I really
like this guy got much um he's so cute
especially in this picture oh oh wait a
minute that's not him that's another boy
Lauren give that money back besides she
has to do laundry tonight oh come on
Judy i'll come over tomorrow and do your
laundry all of its let's all I'll clean
your bathroom please does the cute guy
in the picture have an older brother for
me here so let's go we got a window seat
important I'm cool no not you Kevin to
me you'll be the taco truck across the
street
what Brian did to the stuff from wow
everything's really easy to find
including me where am I supposed to hide
from my afternoon nap look at he threw
out my bowl rep tool hey what's going on
fellas fits his all bent out of shape as
Brian cleaned out the stockroom today
you did all this today that's not good
happy this is a free man free day job
yeah boy sudden a dangerous precedent
here I'll talk to you better because
it'd be a shame if there was an accident
that caused the boy to work a little
slower Fitz you're talking about my son
yeah I started be ashamed at night hello
Brian watch your back bar razor so it's
quite a job reorganizing the stockroom
man someone move one on boxes I had them
all organized by stocking brian at your
lunch break sit down and eat your
sandwich econd day Brian drop that box
again drop the box drop the box aren't
the box all right stuff this is terrible
now I gotta follow the damage of course
I got to correct the inventory and the
cost we pass on to the consumer not if
you hide the bar look at your son you
can't know twitchy again you're doing
the same thing with this job you did to
the PSAT I just want to do well sit down
there's two ways you can go through life
you can either worry about every little
thing and give yourself an ulcer like a
keen you know his mom does as Pez
dispensers becomes exactly or you can go
through life like me a happy guy with a
nice house a beautiful wife and family
and a stomach that laughs at spicy food
I've been feeling a little burnt out
lately every once in a while you got to
take your foot off the gas at Coast you
know right afterwards I'm gonna go
straight to the library and research for
relaxation techniques and yoga
meditation or you could use one of the
relaxation techniques we've developed
here at Pharisees
believe it fit we just got b*at by a
gold vest boy I got moves bill fact he
could be the answer to our gear and face
off against those hot sh*ts and bridal
registry really Thanks no no no no don't
tell the puck away put it back up there
with all the other important notices
yeah hey you guys you know that this
talk is a sign-up sheet to take a
management test for your department yeah
we used to use the Heimlich maneuver
instructions but we can anymore because
somebody almost d*ed I got a narrow
focus anyway thanks for inviting me to
this guy's has a lot of fun yeah you see
it took your foot off the gas the world
didn't fall apart you're also part of
the loyal hard-working Brotherhood that
is Berenson's excuse me I wanted to buy
a towel rack but I can't find anybody on
the sales floor to help me you're not
supposed to be back
[Music]
hey hey wow you guys are exactly where I
left you this morning when I went to
work forget moved all day oh my god you
have moved all day you think those
snacks got there Tina oh yeah we haven't
moved all day what's this oh it's a
portable DVD player I bought it so I
could watch movies during study hall
thought you were gonna use your money to
get a tutor oh yeah you were gonna get a
tutor bill it's not going to be the
woman from the movie and I found that
tape by the way there's copies yeah I I
don't need it to drawl do fine on the
PSAT without run well good for you i'm
glad you're not stressing out about it
we've been working on relaxing yeah i
might not even take the test at all what
do you mean you might not take the test
at all well when i thought about it it's
just a practice test it's not like the
world's gonna end I just decided I
should coach well you know take my foot
off the gas yeah well maybe I'll take my
foot off the gas to wonder where I
should put it can't believe you broke
our kids just the other day you told me
you wanted him to relax there's relax
and then there's putting his dirty socks
in the hamper when he's 40 you do that
for me I was talking about you and if we
get another one of you and this house
we're gonna need three more me so now
you want me to convince him to take the
test yeah go talk to him if he doesn't
take it he'll always regret it and
involve our kids he's the one who's
going to be successful to one more
counting on oh that's nice oh you're
both very oh god I got bigger problems
now Ryan about the PSAT I think you
might have taken something I said the
wrong way and I know that you've learned
to relax from the master but don't take
it too far when you get an opportunity
to do something that might make your
life better you got to take it you
understand well I i guess but how come
we've never taken that management test
at work what there's the management test
at work well don't you remember the
notice in the stockroom we use as a
hockey puck wow you play hockey at work
just dad play hockey at work if it
wasn't for him there'd be no lead that
is it young man you go up to your room
to study dad now yes I was a little hard
on him I'll just gonna see if he's okay
stop there's a test you could take to
get a promotion there's also a cartoon
turtle you could draw to get into art
school I'm not taking that tacky feel
why aren't you taking the management
test I don't want to be management it's
it's more work more stress and not much
more money plus it keep me away from the
things I love the most yeah kids would
miss you yeah then to Bill I don't care
about you becoming a manager but you
need to take that test and do your best
to pass it as an example to brine the
tests next week I'll never be ready by
then help you study the important part
is we get Brian back on track because
he's the one kid in this house that is
going to be successful
hey Lauren honey hi listen I'm good news
you don't have to go out with that dork
Jordan anymore Kevin and I broke up I
know Jordan told me last night we went
out oh you and Jordan and if dad in a
woman named brooke if I went on a day to
ya house back fast sorry no no no no no
this is great guy you know you found
someone and I'm exactly where I want to
be back on the market freezer-burn 38
year old bird hmm that reminds me gotta
get a scarecrow I don't my employee
handbook we've had that thing for 18
years and you're just now taking the
wrapping Judy what is there really to
know wow I'm gonna get a 40 minute lunch
break no start from the beginning shall
we okay the four categories of
disciplinary action category one verbal
warning it should be noted on the
employees file and confirmed in writing
stating the offense the steps to remedy
the offense in a time limit for oh my
god this is so bored you know what might
help there's this scene in private tutor
I'll never forget it good I found the
other two tapes and they're gone here's
a list of do's and don't do give verbal
warning do take steps to remedy the
offense do not touch the remote control
unless you do want to see the kansas
game Oh Kansas is playing no but we have
to stop you're right maybe we could just
check the score
yeah yeah fatter oh my god we just
watched two basketball games we wasted
three hours oh you guys watching the
game no no we're studying your father's
gonna ace that management test because
it's an opportunity he can't pass up I
don't even know why the TV was on I must
have sat on the remote who drank all
these beers and we got to do better we
gotta set a better example okay we're up
okay all right sexual harassment policy
stop it sexual harassment is not about
sex it's about power especially in
supervisor subordinate relationship Judy
I have an idea I'm not going to be your
subordinate haven't your way supervisor
you got to supervise me more often kind
of surprised me with that third demerit
myself yeah that's how we waste another
hour and oh no just 10 minutes okay why
is it so hard for us because we're
terrible study is how do we even make it
through high school she desire asses off
you can't cheat you're doing this to
send a message to frighten what if I
fail what kind of message is that
sending you I'm not gonna feel you are a
good father you could do whatever you
set your mind to thanks honey you're
right I'm gonna study my heart out and
pass this thing good are you coming I
don't have a test to pass time already
supervisor five points of the Berenson's
star of service include graciousness
intelligence thoughtfulness honesty
level headedness star of service emplou
honest pneus smartness actress and
private tutor oh wow are you really
going to go through with this test huh
do you need any help no no I'm fine are
you sure cuz like he teach you some
pretty neat tricks like gasps like when
you're memorizing a group of worse you
can take the first letter of each word
form an acronym like this level
headedness intelligence graciousness I
want a steve thoughtfulness and why me
smell tiful no Phil no guilt I'll
remember it or it could spell light how
am I gonna remember light star service
light starlight or star of guilt sure
you know you're pretty good at this you
think yeah I don't know I make funny
sometimes calling you Brainiac Brian the
brain maniac Brian Vaughn Brainiac
they're all offshoots of Brainiac but
the point is and you know you really
have a gift for study to tell the truth
I do kind of miss it listen listen Brian
when I told you to relax I I just wanted
you to take a break so you didn't burn
out it's like me in the Rockford Files
if i watch it too much I get sick of it
I can't stand it so I do the only
logical thing turn off the TV oh I
switched the Barnaby Jones so you're not
following me I give it to saying it's
all about balance so I I think I'll just
take the PSAT and do my best but I'm not
going to make myself create great cuz
you're meant for great things Brian the
other two kids let's be honest they're
just as intelligent you have bright
futures ahead of them
thank you daddy my vibe somebody has
faith in us come on Tina more in my
slippers hurt have you got him on the
wrong feet when you put them on hey
before we go up there I just wanted to
wish you good luck I'm really proud of
your dad that's great you've really
inspired me to apply myself and do well
on the PSAT next week oh good for you
look I've learned a lot about you in the
past few weeks and now I know that it's
okay to relax a little bit as long as I
do know honest day's work Thanks wow
he's really proud of you know I feel
like crap come on crib sheets give it up
come on
[Music]
02x18 - Still Stressing
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Bill and Judy Miller are a blue-collar Chicago couple trying to raise three children responsibly without sacrificing their youthfulness.
Bill and Judy Miller are a blue-collar Chicago couple trying to raise three children responsibly without sacrificing their youthfulness.