[Music]
look I have to sell my car want this ad
could be perfect what do you think of
this 1997 four-door sedan slightly
damaged rear end full-size spare tire a
lot of miles but serviced regularly all
right you placing a personal ass well
she's selling her car right yes she's
going to give me a percentage if I help
her sell it I couldn't do it on my own
it's very hard for me to part with mr.
puffin Chuck hmm name I gave my car mr.
puffin chef you named your car doesn't
crazy people name their favorite things
I guess you're right I've been known to
do that in that right Thelma and Louise
gross they weren't thrust when you were
four I know that mom is that like for
good separation
me
[Applause]
[Music]
hey how did Jesus checkup go find she'll
be out in a minute turns out it wasn't
an infection okay what I'm n is it over
and can we go to the Mona I'm sorry are
your friends waiting for you it's mom
yeah I mean I'm I said okay what I meant
was shut off the patina likes this
doctors the first one in years she has
imbued you have got one feisty little
daughter mrs. Miller oh my god she
didn't take a snap at you did she know
why is she a biter oh I just stay away
from this general area Oh have you met
my other daughter Lauren hi Tina says
the nicest things about you really know
she wants you to run away so she can
take all your stuff this guy's great by
the way if you have any old toys lying
around I have this donation box here
we're having a rummage sale to raise
money to keep kids off dr*gs I'm all for
that unless it's the kind of dr*gs that
make them sleep on an airplane so you do
a lot of charity work it's rewarding I
am stressed kind of thin in fact I have
a fundraiser tomorrow and nobody to
babysit my granddaughter and I need
someone really responsible hey Laura
maybe sit her I do no no not with your
plate being so full with school and
dance and school dance and dance school
dr. your wife is on the phone oh excuse
me dancing school no I just don't want
you babysitting for the doctor well why
not when we finally found a doctor that
Tina like I don't want you screwing that
up by being a responsible I am NOT
you're responsible hey how about the
time you babies after the Sullivans and
they gave you their cell phone for
emergencies and you used it all night
long ok Tiffany spread a rumor that I
have to shave my chin
and if that's not an emergency i don't
know with it so how about the
babysitting yeah I'm sorry I can't did I
mention it pays fifteen dollars an hour
oh I'm sorry I can't
[Music]
hey I'm going to take these board games
for dr. blooms toy drive babysitting for
him again tonight that's the third time
this week when did we buy those board
games that once the TV was broken oh
yeah black April those things that just
remember Lauren I know Mom be
responsible yeah we don't want to repeat
it when you babysat for the Davises and
you loaned out there Porsche for a
joyride okay how is that my fault that's
the one who asked to borrow it because I
was testing you and you failed Lauren
you fail who is a great car sailor I'm a
great commander I'm not great for
Stanley all right he's found someone to
buy mr. Popkin chuckle rich name is
crunk and he'll be over in about two
hours crunk it's that short for crazy
drunk he's a great guy you know he hangs
out at the arcade if you give him a
dollar you can hit him as hard as you
want gonna let some guy means crunk by
my car why not he's got the money and he
wants to buy it so what's the problem is
the answer you're just gonna have to
keep looking okay I don't want mr.
puffin job and driven around by some
crazy weirdo you don't have to say it
out loud we're all thinking it hey hope
you ready for a big surprise that you're
not coming in unless you promise me
you're wearing pants and this time swear
that's a ridiculous bill it's a summer
trick
he drink hey butch is a retired police
thought how are you sure he's retired
maybe the Sarge took his badge because
he's a loose cannon who plays by his own
set of rules oh he's on the fourth for
eight years sniffing out dr*gs you
remember that big heroin bust at that
farm up in Cumberland County he actually
found a needle in a haystack oh you've
seen him in action yet no but I've been
dying to yeah I let them search my son's
room nothing what's up with kids
nowadays yeah hey you remember that
stuff bear we kept our stash in back in
high school smokey smokey hello stone
park higher than the average bear yeah
we what my stash in a book but then we
thought people get suspicious if we had
a book I think Smokies down in the
basement let's see the dog can sniff em
out Oh where's your body such as it's
your job yeah that's which he's an old
retired police dog Judy do we still have
that teddy bear from high school you
know the one wearing the tie dye trip oh
yeah I thought just the other day Lauren
pulled it out with the other toys to
donate to dr. bloom that was smoky are
you crazy this monkey remember the bear
with the potbelly god that was smoking I
think covered him years ago I was going
to but that night Yellow Submarine came
on and then I guess I just forgot
what red panda Tommy wasn't holding week
I don't remember how come you don't
remember it was years ago and I had a
teddy bear full of pot what's the big
deal I'm you just call this doctor and
say you want it back because it had
sentimental value or a street value
because if you already found the bear
and what's inside of it he'll know were
the idiots that donated a pot bear to
his anti-drug charity so let's go down
to his office and steal it that you want
to take butch he's trained for this sort
of thing I'm not gonna bring an old
incontinent dog to dr. blooms office hey
he might be old but he's not you got
paper tall
no one's your starchic mrs. Miller oh
we're just donating some toys why is he
thinking you know I work in a medical
office to wow we have a sliding zumdahl
also feel for you up I don't see smoke
keep digging Oh Oh dr. bloom this is my
husband huh oh nice to meet you thanks
for the contributions no problem only
non-receipt police my taxes maybe if my
wife calls would you tell her I'll meet
her at the theater sure well I can't
believe you're donating more toys
especially with the two boxes with
Lauren already dropped off at my house
was it your house too yes there are oh
you folks are very generous well we had
a big stash at home a toy well doc we
better go and do more good deep you guys
are unbelievable we've heard that before
lay it out and find the bear before it
falls into the wrong hands well good
people put the toy car back how do I
never get any hey what are you guys
doing now nothing oh my god you're here
to check up on me aren't you that's
right young lady where the dr*gs but it
why would there be dr*gs here it could
happen through a crazy series of events
I don't suppose you brought over from
our house yes dr. Gwynn's taking them to
its fundraiser tomorrow what are you
guys doing there's an old toy in here we
need back dad I already told you you
can't play with it anymore two of the
hungry hippos are broken where is that
they're not cute crap you said a bad
word oh my god bill look at that cute
little toy that l ahead Oh sweetie can
we see your bear no he's mine who I gave
him to me she was not fair come on honey
let me take a look just for a minute
I'll trade you for this nice car believe
can we just see it for a second no come
on kid don't Bogart the bear
oh so you guys are branching out now
you're ruining other people's children
too okay I finally got her to calm down
that I couldn't get the bear away but we
need to bear why what's the big deal all
right look there's a small chance that
bear may have something hidden inside of
it it's like what dr*gs oh cool this a
long time ago your father and I did a
little experimenting with some marijuana
not much mind you just enough to get us
through a few Jethro Tull cons guys I'm
not stupid I mean dad still wears a
t-shirt that says doobie University
rolling team hey Jubie university is a
fully accredited give it up bill look we
admit we made some bad choices back in
high school Jethro Tull but it was a
different time back then we were
protesting a w*r what w*r grenada I was
on edge all that week look because we
did some really stupid stuff when we
were younger doesn't mean that you
should ever don't worry mom you and dad
are all the reason I need not to do
dr*gs thank you hey but I can't believe
it he would think that I would mess up
this job and you guys messed it up for
me I mean the blooms were even thinking
about taking me on their family vacation
to Cancun we had idea that barrel never
cleared customs
you want the bear you can take it once
Ella falls asleep what's this oh you may
not recognize it it's called a baby
monitor responsible parents use them to
make sure their kids are okay hey this
didn't have these when you were young oh
that's right they didn't have baby
monitors car seats fresh Bruce socks
you're alive aren't you
[Music]
[Music]
[Music]
so what do you think I like it so did
the last eight people who took a test
drive why didn't any of em by it well
I'm I'm just waiting for the right
person you can understand that can't you
andy hall yeah this car is a beauty she
drives real smooth and she's got a nice
quiet engine he I'm sorry ki karda he
his name is mr. Popkin Chuck here we go
sounds kind of naughty but I named him
no it's adorable my last car was named
go Barry hello mr. pentell Gavin's two
of them looks like mr. Postum Jack might
have a nice living home in your garage
he sure will except I don't have a
garage I went park on the street no in
the rain and the bird number two yeah
we're done here we are not done um would
you consider buying a car cover those
are kind of a hassle okay Jacob oh no
did you just you just pull over for a
second I need to talk to my business
associate here what's wrong with you
she's perfect she drives ten miles an
hour and likes crazy car names mr.
Pupkin drug wouldn't even know you're
gone Oh leave mr. second sh*t outside in
the cool in the rain all night long it's
a car not a person okay if you're gonna
start talking crazy I can't deal with
you I'm sorry all I'm saying is mr.
puffin chug is stronger than you think
and you spent nine years raising them
right but it is time to let go I know
you're right she seems like a nice
person I'm sure she'll take good care of
them it's time for us to say goodbye wow
it does have a quiet engine
I don't know like 200 bears in no way to
tickle time we've left let's find us
week
oh good god honey here was just a bad
dream hey great news that no continent
hi what the hell's going on here I don't
know but I would call the cops
[Laughter]
so you broke into my sleeping
granddaughters room with a drug-sniffing
dog to find a bear that you stopped with
reaper put it like that it sounds
criminal it is criminal come on tosh the
bear was empty so 20 years ago Bill and
Judy had a little potty it's not like
they were in here smoking a bong thank
you for what's a bong yes thank you fit
I think it's bedtime Ella I'm still
going to kingkahn right I'll take a pay
cut I'll go free how wait in the car
this whole thing just fun way out of
control we made a mistake but we didn't
want to ruin our relationship with you
as opposed to breaking into my
granddaughter's room and terrorizing her
whoops get down from there so sorry we
will replacement hello uh well its
medicinal and I I sometimes use in my
practice I am where do you go to medical
school doobie University not cutting
some slack I deal with screaming snotty
kids all day and I will not apologize
for the occasional recreational use of
how is that belong to it's theirs
I think you should leave and find
yourself another doctor way hideous
seems to like your bag to get that mutt
out of here dr. bloom what are you doing
here well I came by because I wanted to
tell you that I'm sorry about everything
that happened and but I just like to ask
you two questions sure well the first is
would you ever consider taking me back
as Tina's doctor what's the second
question do you have any hohos how about
a can of frosting given peanut butter an
old 20 maybe
[Music]
way cause you make me
[Applause]
03x20 - Still Holding
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Bill and Judy Miller are a blue-collar Chicago couple trying to raise three children responsibly without sacrificing their youthfulness.
Bill and Judy Miller are a blue-collar Chicago couple trying to raise three children responsibly without sacrificing their youthfulness.