01x09 - "Sokotsu nagaya" no kai

[bunniefuu]

I am the yakuza who is most obsessed about comedy in Osaka, nay Japan,

the boss of Shinjuku Ryuseikai.

I really wanted to be up here earlier,

but if I come out the others who follow have a hard time.

I am the Main act [shinuchi] after all.

Oh don't worry, children are safe. They have no money.

And you know, there are no yakuza that look like Takakura Ken

or Sugawara Bunta. [both are famous actors]

The real thing

looks like this.




Also there are a lot of morons in the yakuza.

You write Wakagashira [captain]

and they read Waka-atama [young head].

What?

Time for me to start?

I know that.

But having a funny introduction is my style.

I'll start.

In one apartment

there used to live a tidy but scatterbrained guy

and in the next room lived a lazy and scatterbrained guy.

So they were both scatterbrained,but anyway they went to

the Bodhisattva Kannon in Asakusa,

The "Scatterbrain apartment!" My specialty.




Don-chan is going to do the "Scatterbrain apartment" later?

I see. Ok then I won't do it.

It's Tiger and Dragon!

Yasuo...

Bastard, who'd you come back?

Megumi-chan is not here right now,

and she's my girlfriend now!

He's coming.

- Excuse me!
- What?! What is it? I'm scared!

What? What is it?

- Gimme something to eat.
- Whaat?

- Weren't you going to quit?
- That was the plan.

But my body just couldn't deal with work.

Crap like hourly wages, radio exercises in the morning.

I'm a yakuza through and through.

So?

Well Shinjuku would be bad, so

Wolf mercantile association?

- Meguro HQ!
- That's on the same Yamanote [circle] line!

You know of Rikio?
The guy who used to be Pops's apprentice?

Pops!

He's originally from western Japan and

when he lost in a turf w*r against the Ryuseikai they left Shinjuku.

So I figured it was a perfect fit for me
to get back into this business.

- Aye Sir!

And then somehow he took a liking to me,

- so I was put in charge of his money.
- Wait a sec, wait a sec.

I have a bad feeling about this.

That's right, I spent his money.

Wow, no sense of remorse.

For some reason, everyone wants me to take care of their money.

I don't think I'm suited for it, but you know.

Besides security is just too lax.

If I swiped a little cash here and there before I deposited,

I thought I could get away it.

But you got caught!

You got caught, that's why I'm feeding you!

What is it?

- What should we do?
- What do you mean "What should we do?"

Don't you have to go on stage?

- What?

- Doesn't it seem interesting?
- Huh?!

What are you talking about?
He's a troublemaker!

You're right,
but as a Rakugo story, this is interesting.

Kotora-san...

If I say that this is a pain, then I'll lose out on a story.

Or rather if I don't hear the ending of this story, I can't put it on stage, or

behind you...

Let's listen to his story a bit more.

Whoa.

What the?

You ok?

Are you ok?

Damn it. The way he's doing it is too orthodox.

Putting a bounty on my head.

And it's only 5 million.

You can get 10 million for the M1 Grand Prix [comedy tournament], f*ck that sh*t.

How much do you have to spend to get into this problem?

Well I was taking out 100,000 maybe 200,000 from the account,

but no one seemed to notice and Rikio said that he was going overseas,

so I figured it was my chance and I took 5 million.

In a way, that's equivalent trade.

That's not the end of it.

There was a hidden camera in Rikio's office

and everything was captured.

The mistress initiated it you know.

Come on, it's common courtesy to eat whatever is given to you.

What are you,

- an animal??
- Anyway,

I'm glad I met up with you.

We've been through a lot together, and besides you said that you had no feelings for Ryuseikai.

- You're missing something.
- Huh?

I ain't your friend.

You don't have any parents right?

No one is going to be sad even if you die.

I haven't forgotten that,

and I can either send you to that Rikio or k*ll you

and get that 5 million for myself. You f*cking sh*t!

Yamazaki, you f*ck!

Excuse me when you are both glaring at each other,

- but by chance Mr Tanabe
- I'm staying here!

- Let him stay here!
- No way!

- Who the f*ck is this?!

Yakuza do crazy things.

If the yakuza is staying,

I'm going!

- You have to be kidding me!
- Shh!

Aye sir!

- Yo, are you sure this is the right room?
- Yes, er,

- probably.
- Probably? You moron!

What use are you?

Can I help you?

- This ain't it.
- I'm sorry.

I'm sorry, but can you please go somewhere else?

And so he's gonna stay in my room for a bit.

- I'm going to get ready for the stage now.
- Wait, Kotora!

- What is it?

- Sit here!
- I have to go...

- I'm tell you to sit here!
- Why?

- Please, sit here! Please!
- Ok fine.

- What is it?
- Well, um,

our house is not a hostel specializing in yakuza.

It's an ordinary home...

I want you to understand that? Right, Sayuri-chan?

Look your yakuza and this yakuza, might be the same yakuza but the yakuza is different.

Quit saying yakuza, yakuza, you f*ck!

Oh god! What is this?

I'm frozen?

I can't look away!

- Um, Mr. Tanabe,
- What?

Everyone who comes to this house always goes through the introductions,

so let me start.

I am Donbei, the master of this house.
Nice to make you acquaintance.

And this frozen one here,

this is my son Donta.

Those are the grandchildren Saya and Taro.

Over here are my apprentices, Donkichi, Dontsuku, Donburi,
and what was your name??

- It's Udon.
- Udon, so silly.

I was told by the doctor not to inhale,

but anyway who cares about details like that.

This is my son's wife Tsuruko, and my wife Sayuri.
Please be kind.

Nice to meetcha.

Uh, yes...

Well that's it then.

Oh by the way this guy steals so keep your money hidden.

Oh Kotora-chan, I'll go with you.

Oh we have to go as well!

- You should go too, dear.
- Why?

Take the kids and go buy some milk or eggs.

Er why?

Maybe some beer instead? Don't you think Tsuru-chan?

This is Hop Step Jump-tei, Jump.

A few days back, I got an interview from Young Jump [the manga magazine].

Can you do a similar story?

There are no stories like that.

A story about a marked yakuza? It's too bloody. The audience would never laugh.

It doesn't have to be a yakuza, maybe a wanted man.

Oh there's a story about a corpse called Scatterbrain apartment [sokotsu nagaya].

What's that?

They find a John Doe in Sensoji temple.

That's good. Do that one!

This makes no sense.

Why should the Master answer his apprentice's request?

Even this Kotora has realized that if I learn similar stories,

I can adapt to any situation.

And that's when the elder did a bungee jump!

That bastard's so annoying, jump this, jump that!

I'm really really worried about Sayuri-chan back home.

- You were a singer Toruko-san?
- Yes,

but I haven't worked at all since I got married.

That's a shame Toruko-san,

you're still so young, Toruko-san.

It's a waste.

Um, it's Tsuruko,

- not Toruko (Turkey).
- Oh sorry,

I'm a quarter Turk, so

Wah?

No wonder you're so chiseled.

Oh you're beautiful too, mistress.

If we had met 10 years earlier,

I might've committed a sin.

Oh, sushi! Let's get sushi! Tsuruko-chan, get the best quality one!

Yes ma'am!

Oh, thank you!

This is so fun!

- Oh I'm a bit drunk now.
- Me too!

It's like I've been bewitched.

- So this is the send mail button right?
- That's right.

- Ok, Sayuri-chan! I'm very worried about
- No, no you have to input that

That won't work, Master.

Your turn!

I'm counting on you Master, I'll be in the audience.

Thank you very much for filling the seats.

Yo! We've been waiting for the scuttlebutt apartment!

Not scuttlebutt, it's scatterbrain! [word play: sokotsu (collarbone) not sakotsu]

From what I heard,

the total population of the earth is about 6.1 billion.

Of which 4 billion 875 million always make mistakes.

Well today's audience

haven't made a mistake,

thank you.

People who always make mistakes are called scatterbrained.

"Hey! Stop that fight! You're a married couple!"

"What is it? Barging in barefooted. We're not having a fight."

"You were! You were just screaming 'Get out of the house!'"

"I wasn't screaming.

God, what's wrong with you,

- you know that I'm still single!"
- "Oh yeah.

Then what was that?"

"Oh you mean, that,

you know that thing came by,

it's running around this apartment full of energy."

- "Oh a rat?"
- "No, not a rat,

you know much larger."

- "Oh an elephant."
- "Not an elephant, want me to smack you?"

What's wrong? You're scrunching your face.

It's as if I'm seeing my old self.

"You know the one that goes, bow, wow"

"Oh a dog."

"That's right, a dog! A dog came into my room and then left horseshit."

"A dog wouldn't leave horseshit. What are you talking about?"

"Well anyway, I got so pissed off, and because it was a red dog, I shouted,

'Red Get out of the house!'

You probably misheard that."

That's so hopeless.

Don't laugh at that!

In an apartment lived a tidy and scatterbrained man.

And next door was a lazy and scatterbrained man.

One day the tidy one went to the Bodhisattva Kannon to pray.

What is it?

What's this crowd about?

Yeah, there's a John Doe.

- Oooh, I'd like to take a look.
- Same here.

I've been trying to get a peek,

but you won't be able to get in front unless you crawl there.

Crawl?!

Oh excuse,

- I would like to get in front but
- Go away! We all want to get in front!

Damn you!

Hey, hey hey! What are you doing?

Alright, come on, if you've seen it go away!

Oh you just came.

Come over here.

Thank you very much.

"So, um" it's gonna start now?"

"Nothing is going to start,

he's a John Doe."

"So his name is John Doe, I see.

So what does he do?

"Oh this is bad, a weirdo came.

Look here, he's under this cover."

"I see.

Excuse me? Why don't you get up? Everyone is watching."

"Hey, he's not going to get up.

He's already dead."

"Oh,

then he's a Dead Doe.

You told me he was John Doe."

"Um, I don't really want to talk to you for long.

So take a look and check if you happen to know him."

"Sure.

Although there's no way I would know this guy.

What the? This is Kuma!

If you know his name, you really know him?

Know him? He's my next door neighbor!

He's good buddies, we're like brothers!

We were born on different days but we swore that we'd die on the same day.

- That's so ordinary.
- That's right, we're ordinary friends!

Who did this to you?

- Was it you!?
- Stop kidding around!

I was worried, and wanted to know who this guy was.

It's Kuma! It's Kuma for sure! No mistake!

Ok, ok then. Go to his home and get his wife

He's got no wife! He's single.

- Then how about his parents or relatives?
- He's got none.

He'll totally alone in this, he's a pitiable guy.

- That's a problem.
- Well let's do this then,

I'll go and fetch the person.

- The person?
- "What do you mean 'the person?'"

"You know John Doe, the person."

Huh?

Will you be quiet?

But the person? He's already dead!

It gets interesting from this point, so shut up and listen.

"He was saying that he wasn't feeling well this morning after all."

"This morning?

Oh if it's this morning, then you've got the wrong person.

This man's been here since last night."

Huh?

"That's why I'm saying that you have to bring the person here.

We won't get to the bottom of this otherwise.

He's one of those that's not too clear about himself.

So I bet that he doesn't know himself that he's been like this."

Hey, hey, hey. Master's gone bonkers.

"So let me go get the person. And once the person is here and we can look at the two, we'll know that he's the person. Case closed."

Hey Kuma! Get up Kuma!

Kuma!

- What a moron, screaming, Kuma, Kuma!
- Wake up Kuma!

Get out here Kuma!

Oh wait that's me! Hey what's up! What's up?

What's up?

This is no time to be sitting and smoking.

Don't be surprised by this!

So you know they went there, you know to Arkansas. Wait Arkansas is wrong,

- I mean Asakusa [word play, dosakusa (commotion), Asakusa]
- Wait a sec.

- I don't get it.
- What?

It makes no sense if he's at home.

- He's dead right?
- It's that nonsense part that's funny.

What?

He's so scatterbrained that he doesn't even realize that he's already dead. That's why he's smoking at home. Isn't that right?

Don't give me that "Isn't that right?"

I'm not your best friend, I'm your Master!

- Fine.
- It's not fine!

That's why I'm saying this. Besides you're not even wearing your kimono, why are you here?

I'm not an apprentice! I'm here to observe! Observe!

- Then pay the observation fee, you bastard!
- Ah Master,

I think that observer

over there is far more problematic!

- What the f*ck? Ignore me, just go on ahead.
- I got it.

That bastard!

sh*t, if I took this to court, I know I'd win!

- Can I continue?
- Yeah.

So Hachi explains everything to Kuma.

Hey, hey. Wait a sec. A John Doe.

Me?

Don't say something weird like that.

- I don't feel dead.
- That's where you've got guts.

Where were you last night?

I joked with Red, then it got dark,

so I went to drink, maybe about 5 bottles.

I felt good and I passed by the Bodhisattva Kannon,

but I don't remember how I got home after that.

See I told you.

You drank bad sake and d*ed.

You keeled over at the Bodhisattva Kannon and d*ed. But you didn't even notice that and came back home.

- I see.
- See.

Now that you tell me, I haven't been feeling well since this morning.

- See! Alrighty, let's go now.
- Where?

- To get the body.
- Whose?

- Yours!
- Stoooop!

- Can you please not stop at every point?
- Now I really don't get it.

Alright, let me accept that he's still alive.

But I don't get the part where he's going to get the body.

If Kuma is going to get the body, then who is the body?

- That's the punch line.
- What?

"I know I'm being carried, but who is being carrying me?"

That's what I don't understand!

There is no f*cking punch line!

- Will you stop screaming!
- But this is f*cking impossible!

It's that impossible part that the punch line.

This is only possible because in Rakugo, you only use words and almost no props.

Why can't you get it?

- Kotatsu...

- you just said it well.
- Oh stop.

That's exactly it.

It's your skill as a story teller to get the audience to follow an impossible story.

And then it's up to the audience to find this funny or to reject as incomprehensible.

What I don't get it, I don't get it!

What the f*ck, why are you two, father and son, having so much fun!

We're not having fun.

The previous stories you taught me,

even if some of them were kinda nuts, I could accept.

But this time, I refuse.

What do you not like about this?

- It's because you said something gross.
- What?

Excuse me, is Ryu-chan in?

- It's Megumi-chan!
- Megumi-chan?

Get out of the way!

Tanabe-san!

It can't be!

- Why are you here?
- I came to see you.

Don't say anything and go home right now, please.

I told you, outta my way.

You're so cute.

The spell is,

- the spell is being undone.
- Shut up!

Megumi-chan, let's go to my place!

- Now is not a good time.
- Why?

Yakuza cars were in front of your apartment.

For real?

- So who is this Yamazaki?
- "So?,"

- he's a yakuza.
- That I f*cking know!

- He's Ryu-chan's friend.
- Ryu-chan? But you're Ryu-chan. (Liu is pronounced Ryu)

- Ryu-chan is Dragon Soda's...
- Taiji!

You stay quiet!

This is why I hate Japanese yakuza.

You must know what trouble is like Ryu-chan.

You're working hard in Japan,

but your fellow immigrants steal and smuggle people.

- So you feel unwelcome,
- I'm not Ryu-chan, I'm Liu-san.

Yo, Ryu-san,

the yakuza are the same.

There are some problem yakuza who steal our hard earned money!

So you understand. Help us out here.

Ok.

Liu-san?

- Go to Shinjuku Ryuseikai.
- There, xie xie (thank you).

"Oh man this is me.

I look terrible, if I were to end up like this, I should have ate better food."

"No point crying now."

- "No point crying now."
- Sorry to interrupt your studies.

Hey! Hey! Didn't I tell you not to get out of the house?

Calm down.

- I just thought of something good,
- Yeah?

- What was that funny story back then?
- Rakugo. Scatterbrain apartment.

That's it
Scatterbrain apartment.

When I heard that, it came to me. Can you

- k*ll me.
- Huh?

Not for real. Just pretend. Pretend.

We'll trick Rikio and split the 5 million.

With that money, I'll leave Tokyo and go to Okinawa or Hokkaido.

What about me?

Guess you'll go to prison.

- Hey, hey, hey don't break my shop!
- You f*ck!

Don't worry! You'll get out after three or four years.

If you k*ll a criminal like me, that's about it.

- So listen, listen.
- Yeah.

Just bang the g*n a couple of times in a crowded place.

And then pretend that you dropped me in the ocean.

You just need to go to jail saying that you k*lled me.
Even if the body doesn't show up, Rikio will believe it.

Yeah.

It's Scatterbrain apartment.

- What do you think?
- I'll do it.

- Great.
- But I'll really k*ll ya and get the 5 mil.

- Since no one will be sad, even if you die.
- What?

I don't want to rub it in,

but I already have people who will be sad.

There are folks who think of me as family.

Don't be dreaming you f*ck!

You broke it!

- Compensate! Compensate!
- Shut the f*ck up!

Think about it! There are tons of replacements for people like you and me.

Might be for you! Not me!

There are no more replacements for me.

Where are you going?

None of your damn business. Who the f*ck is going to be in debt to you!

Compensate!

You don't get it do you? We are also victims of Tanabe.

That Tanabe is connected to your Yamazaki.

You got proof?

- You saw it right??
- Yes sir.

He was eating with a tall handsome guy.

And where is the proof that the handsome is Yamazaki?

Even if that handsome was Yamazaki,

- he's no longer with us.
- What?

He's quit a long time ago. We'd like to know where the f*ck he is!

You surprised me there.

Gin bocchan [young master], you've grown!

I should have taken a photo there.

I hear you're making a splash, eh?

Don't get the wrong idea. We didn't come here to start a fight.

We just want Tanabe's body. If we get it, I'll even buy a nice suit for bocchan.

It wouldn't look good if the 2nd [boss of Ryuseikai] wore shabby clothes.

Cut it out, Rikio, you bastard.

Pops, see you.

- We're going Tetsuya.
- Aye sir.

And that ghost there too.

Get in. I've left the place as is.

The duo from last time?

Who else would do this?

Please stop!

What are you standing there Taiji?

Do something!
I told you to do something!

Um, where is the owner?

Who gives a f*ck?

Are you stupid?

Oh, I'm sorry!

Not "I'm sorry,"

it's "Obey!"

Obey!

I understand why you want to protect your old buddy.

Don't get us involved.

Sorry.

They even know our house.

Why don't you just give him up?

He...

ran.

But I didn't expect them to come after you.

Don't touch that!

I don't know what you think you are.

But you're still yakuza.

You understand?

Why didn't you say anything?

He was the one who stole our money.

It was difficult to explain. I'm sorry.

I'll take responsibility and fix this.

What're you planning to do when you find him?

He might be k*lled, but I'll hand him to Wolf mercantile association.

If you do that, you'll also lose a finger, Yamazaki.

Remember the guy who stole money with Yasuo? The su1c1de.

411!

These are the letters of thanks from that guy's relative.

- Letters of thanks?
- That idiot Tanabe

was sending money to that kid who survived.

He was hospitalized for a while,

but now the kid is living with his relatives and is going to school.

That doesn't mean he can steal our money.

But it looks like Tanabe still has a human heart,

even if it's only an inch.

If he didn't

he wouldn't try to be like Tiger Mask [manga of a good guy professional wrestler who was raised as an evil fighter, later did philanthropy]

We still have time.

Before he completely becomes inhuman, do something Tora!

I understand the circumstances.

It looks like you've made up your mind.

Normally I too won't stop people from quitting.

I didn't stop my son after all.

Master...

But it's different in your case.

Even if you want to quit,

I'll come after you and won't let you.

A gunfight or a field hospital,

- I'll follow you no matter where you go.
- Why?

When I became your apprentice, you said to let specialists do the special jobs.

That I should be a great yakuza.

There can be only one reason.

The debt?

Sayuri-chan is crying.

Today Tsuruko is crying too.

It's a double whammy.

If you absolutely have to go, then go.

But go as a story teller, not as a yakuza.

But, what the hell am I supposed to do?

What should I do, Tora-chan? I'm with Tanabe-san right now.

- What?
- He called me and asked to borrow money.

Where are you? What's going on?

- Odaiba.
- Where in Odaiba?

- Um, I can see a Ferris wheel.
- You can see a Ferris wheel from almost any where!

I don't know! This is my first time here.

A bridge, in the middle of something bridge.

Something bridge?! Something bridge doesn't help.

- Y, Yasuo. Where is Yasuo?
- He's at the bathroom right now.

- Oh he's coming back.
- Ok, Megumi.

Keep talking,

don't let him leave until I get there!

That's impossible! I'm not a story teller!

Idiot! There's lots,

ask about family, where he's from,

Hello?! Tora-chan!

Hello?! Tora

At something bridge in Odaiba.

Which something bridge?

- They said something bridge.

You're so f*cking useless!

Start the god damn car!

- Thanks, I'll definitely return it.
- Tanabe-san where are you from?

- Mie prefecture.
- Mie, eh?

I can't imagine anything.

Oh there's lots. Like Ise lobster, or beef.

- What about your father and mother?
- They're alive.

- They're farmers.
- Then you should go home.

Huh?

You should go back home.

I bet your parents are worried.

You did your best Tanabe-san.

Buy a ticket home with the money that I just lent you.

Wanna come with me?

Megumi.

"Mom cooked dinner

and knitted gloves for me."

Are you ok? This is Odaiba.

"The chill wind blew, and la, la, la" [she is singing a folk song about home]

Drive faster damn it!

Yo, Taiji, answer me!

You told me be quiet.

Do you want to die?

Sorry.

Aye sir!

I just got here. Where is Yasuo?

Sorry, he went home.

But don't worry,

Tanabe-san said that he's going back to his country home.

He's going to become a farmer with his parents.

Oh Tora-chan!

Tora-chan?

Tora-chan!

Tora-chan!

sh*t! Where did they go?

Gimme a break Tetsuya.

You're being a prefect yakuza in the perfect location.

It's cold! It's cold Tetsuya.

Taiji!

- You have to be kidding me.
- Quick, do it.

For a measly 5 million? Even the M-1 Grand Prix [comedy tournament]

I told you to do it!

Hurry up, Taiji!

People say, you're a klutz, klutz, but

Yo! Scuttlebutt apartment! [Sakotsu, collarbone]

Scatterbrain apartment! You're the biggest klutz!

- Tiger, Tiger,
- Gilletiger!

Why the f*ck are you saying it!

So far I've been telling Non-Fiction Rakugo,

but today's Rakugo is fiction.

There is no relation to existing persons or organizations what so ever.

That's normal.

Back when the city was called Edo, there were 2 klutzy yakuza.

But typically, it's these men that think they are smart.

Shouldn't have done it, but steals the boss's money.

So of course, the boss finds out and now he's got a 500 gold coins bounty on his head.

The other klutzy yakuza

Yamazaki!

It's not Taiji!

My name is Yasuji!

What happened?

sh*t! He b*at me like a sandbag every single f*cking day.

You piss me off!
You piss me off!

Stop!

- Hey, I said stop.
- Let go!

f*ck is "Aye sir!"

I can't "obey" you!

Bastard

Bastard!

So he was k*lled for mistaking his apprentice's name.

Hey, isn't this one really violent?

We promised. That if we catch, Yasuo, we'll split the 5 million.

But he didn't do squat, only complain.

And he'd b*at me for any reason.

I really hated him.

But you didn't have to k*ll him.

I'm sorry.

But that's not all.

What?

I know.

That before Tanabe-san came, he was stealing our money.

Is that true?

Well it wouldn't surprise me if he did.

Then he made it all my fault.

I didn't do nothing, but I got b*at up bad.

Besides, it was him that ratted out Tanabe-san.

I really couldn't respect him.

If the apprentice couldn't respect his aniki [mentor],

you can't do this.

- Ok, I get it, I get it.
- Do you really get it?

- What?
- You were supposed to end up like this.

Oh yeah.

I bet this guy has family too.

He's the same as you.

That kid that you send money every month is gonna cry.

There's no person like that.

- Anyway take off your clothes.
- Why?

You're the one who d*ed here.

- Huh?
- Hey Taiji, no Yasuji.

Take his clothes off,

and call your boss.

Tell him that Tetsuya k*lled Tanabe.

What about me?

Aren't you going back to farm with your parents?

And so Yasuo and Tetsuya exchanged clothes, with Tetsuya being the body to trick the boss.

Alright, as long as you stay in the shadows you'll look like him.

What the f*ck?

I'm all bloody.

Pretend it's his blood.

Hello! This is Yasuji.

Tanabe is dead.

I k*lled him!

Tetsuya-san?
He's with me. Yes.

We're in Odaiba's

Yes.

- When they close they will call us again.
- What's wrong with you?

Tetsuya k*lled Tanabe right?

Huh? What did I just say?

You said, "I k*lled him!"

Oh! Sorry!

Not "Sorry," you idiot.

- Idiot?
- Sorry.

Damn this is confusing me.

This guy just k*lled you.

And you're now Tetsuya.

Then why am I all bloody?

Oh yeah, they'll definitely ask that.

What the f*ck, and you said you'll do it with us too.

Should I go buy some clothes?

No store is open at this hour.

Besides why would go?

Can the clothes be

I can't go to Odaiba?!
The shop is still a mess!

I really don't want to get involved in this.

This is the last bit.

I need your help,

I can't do this alone.

- You're needed here, else
- needed there, else.

There's no punchline.

Then I guess

Ryu-chan is coming!

Oh thanks man, by the way not the one with some weird press-on. [apprike: French word, has nuance of cuteness]

It's not a press-on, it's an insignia [wappen: German word, has nuance of coolness]!

I'll be right back!

So Ryu the clothes shop owner was supposed to bring the clothes,

but unfortunately the boss arrived first.

Good evening. So you did it with this.

Well, put that away.

So where is the body?

In the trunk.

Open it

Take it off

We b*at the crap out of his face, so...

Just take it off.

What are you waiting for?

Sorry for being late!

I don't know if it will fit Tanabe-san, but I brought the new designs

Who the f*ck are you?

Do you know Tanabe?

- Excuse me. This is my friend.
- What?

I'm Yamazaki from the Ryuseikai.

Nice to meet you.

Explain this to me!
Hey!

Yasuji k*lled Tanabe.

I am the witness. There is no mistake.

- And Tetsuya?
- Inside.

Apparently he's not feeling well.

Tetsu.

Open, Tetsu.

You better clean up the mess.

You can at least do that?

Aye sir!

I'm counting on you.

Um, what should I?

Hey.

Baseball.

Turn your self in or you know, do whatever you want.

When you come back, I'll make you a young head [waka-atama is a mispronunciation of wakagashira, or captain]

Give my regards to Pops.

Have a nice day!

So what's left is Tanabe's body.

If anyone finds the body, then they'll find out that Tanabe is not the Tanabe,

so he carried it into the mountains.

Who did? Tanabe himself!

Tell me what's going on.

I really thought Tanabe-san was k*lled.

Yup, Tanabe Yasuo is dead.

Huh?

I inconvenienced this guy too.

And to you two.

- I'll help.
- Don't touch! Don't touch!

If you help, you'll be an accomplice by aiding and abetting.

You're not yakuza anymore.

It'll be bad if a story teller got caught.

See ya.

Did you hear that?

I'm not a yakuza.

Yeah

a yakuza is saying so, so there's no mistake.

- Hey can I ask you something?
- What?

If this body that I'm carrying is me,

then who is doing the carrying?

Yo! It was good again today, Yakuza Rakugo!

Here's your stew!

To tell you the truth, I thought you wouldn't be able to pull off Scatterbrain apartment.

- It's an impossible story.
- I said that from the beginning.

It just shows how difficult your job is.

That's why Kotora, you have to quit as soon as possible, ok?

- Here.
- What?

- Tuition.
- Oh yeah.

- Here you go, this month's tuition.
- Thanks.

Welcome back, Kotora.

Master...

Ok give it back to me.

The money you f*ck!

- Oh sorry. Calm down! Calm down!
- You want to go down the river?!

- Kotora, Kotora, calm down. Don't send me down.
- What?

You calm down your heart. Calm down. Calm down your heart.

I'm sorry. It's because I put it in my pocket right? Sorry, sorry.

Here is this month's payment. Thank you very much for this month.

- Hey Yamazaki-kun,
- Ya?

um, um, you've done a fair amount by now, right?

How much do I need to repay you before you can quit yakuza? Do you know?

Oh yeah, I haven't calculated yet, so I dunno.

If you add the amount that I've repaid already, it comes out to 1.7 million,

- so there's only 2.3 million left.
- Only 1.7 million?

- No, it's already 1.7 million!
- No, it's "only," we're not even at the half way mark!

It's "already," but let's learn faster! Learn faster!

- It's already 1.7 million!
- No it's only 1.7 million! Huh?

Oh these are from Tanabe-san?

What? What? Noooo!

- She's looks like a good wife.
- It's not good!
[picture says, We got married!]

Are you a moron?

Why are you informing me?!

You klutz!