05x21 - The Cycle

[bunniefuu]

Lucy, what's wrong with your face?
! I'm smiling, isn't it obvious?
No, it looks like you're trying to eat your own chin.

How about this?
! Uh This?
Hmm.

I just lack practice.

Why are you trying to smile anyway?
I found it.

Oh, let's not jump to conclusions.

It could be any Principal Brown on that FBI warrant.

It's a common name.

Hmm?
Oh, um Listen, I'm not a furry.

I just wanted to know what I'd look like with a tail.

What?
! What else have you been hiding?
She knows! Finish her now before she tells all the others! Uh, no, that's it.

So what is it that you found exactly?
What is the one thing that would improve the quality of life of everyone in this school by a thousand percent?
Money?
Better.

More money?
Even better.

Real food in the vending machines?
No! Even better! I was looking through Gumball Watterson's records, and he failed a test in kindergarten.

His grade point average is void! I knew I was right to give up on him early.

Let's celebrate! Um, what is that?
Dancing.

Hmm.

Looks like you're trying to shake out a tapeworm.

Come on, join in! See, this is how you do it.

Mmm, mmm! Work it.

What the what?
! What did I do wrong?
Look at this question on the test you did seven years ago.

"I go to the store and buy three bags of chips, and six sodas.

If I eat nine hot dogs, seven burgers, three bags of chips, and drink five sodas, what do I have?
" You answered "No self
-control.

" That was not the correct answer, which means your GPA is one point short.

Do you know what that means?
Uh, Gumball's pierogi antelope?
What?
! No! It's grade point average, and it means you're going back to kindergarten.

Well, have a great second first day at school, honey.

They just waddle around with their pants down, grabbing everything they see, and putting it in their mouths, even if it's a part of your anatomy.

They get into fights for no reason and end up crying and hugging.

Then they just go on slurring unintelligible nonsense, and they pass out wherever they feel like it.

They're like they're like British tourists.

All I'm hearing is that not only do you not have homework, but while we were stuck in lessons, today you got to play with toys, took two naps, and won good
-boy points whenever you made it to the bathroom on time.

What are you trying to say?
Stop going on about how good your day was.

You're right! Thank you, finally.

No, I mean you're right.

My day was awesome! I just need to get rid of my inhibitions.

Ew! What's that?
My inhibitions.

Your what?
Oh, allow me to explain.

Hey, dude, got some T.

P.

?
Thanks! A little over there.

Hmm.

It needs more yellow.

There.

Nigel, what's wrong?
You look like a biscuit that's been dunked.

I've been crying.

Why?
I watched this video of an orangutan saving a baby bird from drowning.

Why?
To remind myself that apes are not just terrifying creatures that bite people's fingers off when they lose it.

Why?
Okay, right now, I'm talking to you as Nigel Brown, your kind, supportive partner the man you've loved for years, who would never hurt you and a man you would never hurt.

Go on.

But that man is also the school principal, and it's his duty to inform you that by putting Gumball in kindergarten, you're one student short of the school board's targets, and if he's not back in your glass by Friday, you're fired! Hmm.

I understand.

Really?
That's so sweet of you.

Gumball, why is air invisible?
Because scientists thought it was too ugly to look at and no one would want to breathe it in.

Gumball, where do clouds come from?
From bird flatulence.

Gumball, where does rain come from?
It's the moon's eyes watering from all the bird flatulence.

Psst! Ugh, what do you want?
Shh! They'll hear.

Meh, maybe.

But as long as we use words with multiple syllables, there's no way they'll understand.

What is it, anyway?
You've already demoted me to kindergarten.

What next, my mom's belly?
Do you want to get back to your old class?
No way I love it here! Everyone looks up to me.

I mean, mainly 'cause of the height difference, but it's still a good feeling.

Huh?
How can you enjoy it here?
It's a world of scheduled nap times, optional pants, and food you don't need to chew.

You just described a retirement home.

Exactly! I get to retire without ever having a job! Oh, I love this place.

Okay, I gotta level with ya.

If you don't come back, I'm fired.

As if I needed more reasons to stay here.

Huh?
What are you doing?
It's weird.

I'm crying.

It looks like you're trying to lay an egg with your face, please stop.

Stop it! Okay, fine, I'll come back.

Ah, thank you.

Please, I said I'd come back.

I'm not doing anything.

Oh, that's your normal face, isn't it?
The only problem is you need to pass a test in order to prove you belong in my class.

So you're gonna have to study like you've never studied before.

Let's go! Gotta think big, think deep Pretty soon, you'll make that quantum leap So What do I do?
I've literally never studied before.

Are you kidding me?
! All these years of teaching you?
Just go to your mind palace, or whatever, and try to remember how to study.

Okay.

I'll try.

Hmm! Hmm.

More like a mind cupboard.

Okay, Watterson, time to roll up your sleeves.

What, more work?
No, roll up your sleeves so I can write the answers on your arm.

But that's cheating! Yeah, but if you rearrange the letters in the word "teaching," what do you get?
Uh Eting
-cha?
What no! "Cheating.

" But isn't that wrong?
Only if you get caught.

Look, when I was your age, I cheated, too.

What the what now?
! I scribbled the answers on the cave wall.

Oh! So that's what cave paintings are.

Okay, what's the best way for me to cheat?
In your case, every way.

Right, Watterson.

You have one hour.

Begin.

Okay, plan "A.

" Mm
-hmm.

Uh Uh I can't read it.

Why?
It's all backwards.

I wrote it in front of a mirror.

Okay, plan "B.

" Oh, no! It does dark when I close my eyes.

Just pull on them! Watch out! What is going on here?
Just, uh visualizing my answers.

Oh.

I've always wondered what that would look like from the outside.

Carry on.

Plan "C," then.

Mm
-hmm.

Huh?
Pull harder! Hmm?
Mmm.

I hope that organ wasn't a vital one.

Next plan.

Uh, sir?
Yes?
Can I use the bathroom?
Mmm.

So did you use the notes we left in there?
Yep.

Oh, good.

I have to say I prefer two
-ply paper it's softer.

What the?
! Okay, next plan! Use the water bottle.

Oh, yeah.

Thanks.

I meant the label Read the label! "Recycle after use.

" Oh, of course.

The answers were written inside the label! What is wrong with you?
! Use these! I can't read that! Don't worry, I've got this.

Never mind! I'll write the answers on the window.

Dagnabit, it's too hot outside.

Watterson, you have five minutes remaining.

I'll just mime it.

First answer, the birth of Venus.

Oh! That's not really necessary.

I can hear you.

Good point.

Question two Oh, we don't have time for this.

I'm gonna do it myself.

What?
No, you can't! You're only one IQ point away from being a vegetable! Question three Question three! Okay, here we go.

Okay, Watterson, I've marked your test, and I've got some bad news.

I'll see you back in eighth grade tomorrow.

Look! You got an "A
-plus"?
! But how?
! Must have been all the time we spent going over it.

Wait, so you actually Yes, I actually learned something.

And a pleasure to keep you with us, too, Miss Simian.

Ah.

Good job, Watterson.

I guess you didn't need me after all to help you chea choose your pen for the test.

Ha.

Yeah, it really helped.

It meant I could focus and didn't need to cheat like you did in the eighth grade.

Ah! Hmm!