Baby's Day Out (1994)

[bunniefuu]

[ Baby ]
Boo-boo.

[ Sighs ]

Couldn't we read
another book?

We've read this one
a hundred times.

Please?

Nanny Gilbertine is so tired
of the Boo-boo book,

she could just gag.

Boo-boo.

All right.
All right.

Boo-boo.

"One fine
and sunny day,

"Baby Boo's nanny
Henrietta said,

"'Baby Boo,

"'today you shall go
on a wonderful
adventure.

"'You will see
the many sights
of the big city.'

"After a lovely
breakfast,

"they walked
down the lane
to the corner...

"where they boarded
a big blue bus.

"They were on their way
to the big city.

"Baby Boo felt
very grown-up indeed,

for this was
his first trip away
from Mother and Father."

Did I tell you?

Baby's having his picture
taken this morning.

Say hello
to Old Willy for me.

Old Willy isn't doing it.

I've hired Downtown
Baby Photographers.

Old Willy's been
photographing
Cotwell babies...

since the
Great Depression.

Old Willy hasn't had
a picture in the paper
in over years.

Everyone we know has had
their baby's picture
in the paper.

Baby Bink is almost a year old
and virtually unknown.

I can't count the number
of times I've been asked...

why we're keeping
our baby a secret.

You're right.

The only way to quiet
that kind of talk...

is to have our
small-minded friends
open up their newspapers...

and see a photograph
of the prettiest baby
in the city.

Get out!
Get out!

Come on,
let's go!

I said move it!

Get up there!

Get over there!
Let's go!

Get moving!

Off with the fuzzy
pink and blue sweaters.
Nice and slow.

Ed, does it matter
which one of us
wears pink or blue?

No!

Cotwell.

Cotwell.

Where is that
little--

Dinner with the Westphals
tonight. Be gorgeous.

Don't forget to do your
breathing exercises...

Dr. Phillips suggested
to reduce stress.

I have breathing
scheduled at : .

Peggy's been reminding me
for a week.
Bless her soul.

Have a wonderful day.

Bing.

What did you forget?

Oh. My pen.

Thank you,
Andrews.

What else?

Darling, you know
how I hate games
in the morning.

Oh! Of course.

Goodness gracious.
How could I forget?

Don't you get--

Don't you get
into any mischief
while Dada's gone.

Won't it be exciting
when he can understand...

all the wonderful
things we say to him?

Bye-bye.

Bye-bye.

Bye-bye.

Bye-bye.

Bye-bye.

Whoa. Bye-bye.

Bye-bye.

He can't look too butch,
but he can't look
too feminine.

He has to look angelic,
like a little prince.

That would suggest blue.

Blue? Won't that look
like we're trying
to match his eyes?

Won't that be
too obvious?

I see lots of babies
with blue eyes
and blue outfits.

What kind of babies?

Rich babies?
Pretty babies?

Regular babies?
Important babies?

Regular babies.

Baby Bink is not
a regular baby.

Buff buff buff
buff buff buff.

Look how shiny
they're getting.

Here we go. Here we go.
There we go.

Now, now.

Now, now.
Almost done.

This is simple.
Ready?

Oh, very,
very handsome.
Let me see.

Hello.

Get the gear.

Get the gear.

He didn't say,
"Get the gear, Veeko."

Come on, let's go.
I'm the supervisor.
You get the gear.

You got the blue sweater.
You help me get the gear.

[ Doorbell Chimes ]

Heads up.

[ Phony Foreign Accent ]
A most pleasant...

and charming good day
to you, sir.

I am Mr. Charlie--

photographer, the babe--

entirely
at your service.

You were expecting us.

Thank you.

Excuse me.

Photographic
equipment.

Look at this place.

Eddie.

We ain't here
to nick no bric-a-brac.

We're here for the hit
of a lifetime.

You want to be a shoplifter,
go to J.C. Penney.

You really think
we can get away
with this?

No. I'm here because
I've got a wild curiosity
about the electric chair.

Sorry.

What a gorgeous baby.

You must be so proud.

I'm Mrs. Cotwell.

I am Mr. Charlie.

Shall we begin?

Uhn!

Mr. Francis,

if you'll go
to the vehicle...

and retrieve
my light... meter.

[ Groaning ]

Excellent.

[ Chortling ]

[ Laughing ]

I'm going to be rich.

I want individual photos
of Baby Bink.

Baby Bink?

What an absolutely
delightful name.

It's a pet name
for Bennington.
Certainly.

I want individual photos
of Baby Bink,

and then I want a portrait
of the two of us.

Whatever you wish,
however you wish.

You've photographed the children
of a number of my dear friends.

Those pictures
are forever appearing
in newspapers and magazines.

It is true.

His picture's
never been published.

That cannot be.

It's true.

I am sure,
in the not-so-distant
future,

this little fellow
will be very well-known.

I want your very best.

I want art.

I want you to set
a new standard for beauty
in baby photography.

I so welcome
the challenge, madam.

And, to that end,

may I ask
one small favor?

May I have
some time alone
with the child?

Oh, I need his
complete attention.

The great bond between
you and your son,

his love for you
will distract him.

I need to study
his marvelous
little features...

to learn how best
to photograph him.

He does well with persons
he is not intimate with?

Does he?

He's a friendly boy,
but he may not like--

Excellent!

Madam, if I might
make a suggestion?

Your garment du jour,

while extremely
magnificent,

is so colorful...

I'm afraid
it will dominate
the photograph...

and detract from
your natural beauty.

I knew
this outfit
was wrong.

I'll be back
in minutes.

Take all the time
you need.

If he gets cranky,
read him his book.

How invaluable.

Thank you.

Mr. Andrews,
hurry to the attic...

and get
the winter wardrobe.
But, madam--

Hurry, Gilbertine.

There you go.

Take the book.

[ Shouting And Laughing ]

Bink really deserves
this moment
in the spotlight.

It's too bad that baby pictures
don't go on the front page.

Ma'am.

Yeah. Uh!

I've never shoplifted.

Everybody out!

We got to make
this fast.

I'm sorry
it took so long.

Where's Bink?

[ Chuckles ]

Eddie.

Huh?
You're a smart guy.

How do you tell
the front from the back
on these diapers?

Are there pockets
in the front?

Very funny.

The front and the back
are the same.

Then it probably don't
make no difference.

Put him in them
regular baby clothes.

That fruit suit's
a dead giveaway
that he's a rich kid.

Come on. Come on.

Good boy. Good.

Oh...

[ Baby Bink Laughing ]

[ Panting ]

Ed.

Huh?

How do I know this milk
won't burn the kid's throat?

If that matters.

Try it on some skin first.

Ow! Ow! Hot!
Ow! Ow!

What's the matter
with you?

I better
let it cool down.

[ Laughing ]

You like that?

Eddie.

- Huh?
- Watch the baby.

[ Laughing ]

Very good.

Now see if it works
the other way.

It works.

Ohh...

Put him in the bedroom.

The more he sleeps,
the less attention he draws
from the neighbors.

And keep an eye on him.

Here you go, kid.

That little
doo-doo machine
is my retirement money.

All right.

Nappy naptime, little jerk.

Go to sleep real nice,

'cause, uh,
Mr. Teddy Bear over here,

he's been up all night
drinking with the Barbie dolls,

and he needs his rest.

All right.
Drink your milk.
Take your nap.

Drink your milk!
Take your nap!

Eddie.

What?

You got any suggestions
how you get these things
to eat and sleep?

Sing him a song.

Uh...

Uh...

* Mary had a little lamb *

[ Snickers ]

* Little lamb *

* Little lamb *

* Mary had a little lamb *

* Her hair was white as snow *

* And *

* Every which way
that Mary went *

* The lamb was
right behind her *

* It followed her
to work one day *

* Work one day
Work one day *

* It followed her
to work one day *

* And Mary lost her job *

Um... Eddie!

What else did Mary's
little lamb do?

Didn't he put
Humpty Dumpty
back together again?

That was Nat "King" Cole.

Nat "King" Cole...

stuck his finger
in the pie...

and yanked out
the bird.

How can a lamb
put a Humpty together again?

He ain't got fingers.

* And then she went
to unemployment **

Norby, knock off the singing
and read him his storybook.

If you can.

Want to hear a story?

Let's see here.
What do we got here?

[ Crunching ]

"Manny and Baby Boo...

[ Snorts ]

"Strol-led through...

"the great big...

"De...

"De...

Department.

"Department store.

How many, many things
there were to buy..."

Or steal, if I was
writing that book.

Or steal, if I was
writing this book.

[ Camera Clicking ]

Mrs. Cotwell.

Dale Grissom, FBI.
I'd like to ask you
a few questions.

You'll have to ask me later.
I'm going to look for my baby.

I'd rather you didn't.
I need you here.

Don't coddle me, Mr. Grissom.

Mrs. Cotwell, there are
five million people
in this city...

and thousands of places
where your boy could be.

It would be pointless
and dangerous...

for you to go out
searching for your baby.

Now, I've been through
a number of these cases.

I understand how you feel.

Have you ever
lost a child?

No, ma'am.

Then you can't possibly
know how I feel.

I apologize.
But would you
stay here?

Please?
For your baby's sake?

Okay.

[ Snoring ]

[ Wings Fluttering ]

[ Cooing ]

[ Snoring Continues ]

Boo-boo.

Boo-boo!

[ Man On TV ]
Great bait action
in fresh or saltwater!

[ Cooing ]

Boo-boo!
Boo-boo!
Boo-boo!

[ Laughing ]

Hi hi.

[ TV Show Continues ]

Boo-boo!
Boo-boo! Boo-boo!

[ Spits ]

[ Spits ]

Do you gotta do that?

[ Spits ]

I like to look nice.

You got to spit?

I don't know about you,

but I don't eat
pieces of my body.

[ Spits ]

[ Spits ]

What?

What'd I do?

You spit on me!

I did not!

Somebody did.

And you're the only one
in the room.

[ Laughs ]

[ Snoring Continues ]

You jerk!

Shh! Quiet.
You're gonna
wake up the baby.

The baby's on the roof!

No, no.
No, no.

Aah!

Aah! Aah!

Norby.

Come on, Norby.

Aah!

Eddie!

Oh!

Ed!

Ed, what happened?

Eddie, are you okay?

People shouldn't
leave these things lying around.

What are you doing, dope?

It was in the way.

What happened?

All right.
Pick him up.

Eddie!
Ed, you're drooling.

Eddie, come on, Ed.

Come on.

Eddie, what happened?
Eddie?

What? This way?

[ Mumbling ]

Oh, great. That's got to be
at least a thousand feet.

Ed, we're going
to have to jump.

We're gonna jump?
Yes.

On three. Ready?
Okay.

One, two...
One, two...

three!
three!

Eddie!
Eddie!

[ Screaming ]

[ Screaming ]

Ed, look... out.

[ Knocking On Door ]

[ Sighs ]

[ Knocking ]

[ Knocking ]

What?

Package.

Where do you
want me to sign?

Uh, anywhere is fine.

H-Have a nice... day.

You old bat.

Which way?

This way.

Let's go!

[ Moaning ]

Ed!

Are you all right?

How can he be all right?

The guy fell off
a building!

He's probably got
contusions, concussions,
contractions.

What's the matter
with you?

Boo-boo.

[ Veeko ]
Okay, just take it easy.

Eddie, how you feeling?

Eddie, how many fingers
I got up?
Two.

Not you.
Eddie, say something.

Here, here.
Put him here.

Sit down on the bench.
Sit down. You okay?

[ Coughing ]

Eddie, when we first
seen you fall,

our first thoughts
were with you
and your family,

should you not survive.

I prayed, Eddie.

Shut up!

Aah!

[ Screaming ]

All right. Take it easy.
Take it easy.

Maybe get
to the right of him.

Please, Eddie, we don't
want to get a ticket.

Get to the right, Eddie!
Get to the right!
Shut up!

Get out in front of him.
I'll jump on the back.

You're making me nuts!
Okay, okay.
Don't get crazy.

Just drive. Just drive.
I'll tell you.

See that lady?

There he is!
I see him!
There he is!

We got him. We got him.

- He's gone! We lost him!
- [ Horn Honks ]

Look both ways!
Look both ways!

- [ Cat Screeches ]
- I think you hit a cat.

There's the bus, Eddie.

Did you see it?
He's getting ahead of us.

There's the bus again!

Driver, next stop, please.

- Wait! I don't see him.
- [ Horn Honks ]

[ Screaming ]

There's the bus!

I see the bus!
I'll get him!

Wait! Wait!
Stop the bus!

Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa!
I forgot something!
Stop the bus!

Wait! Wait!
Wait! Hello!

Stop the bus!

Stop the bus!
Wait! Stop the bus!

Hey!

Did a baby
get off this bus?

A little guy,
about two feet tall.

It's an emergency!

I didn't have nobody today
with a baby.

He was by himself!

What?

He must've got off!

Oh, great.

We're through.

If you didn't park your van
on the sidewalk,

people could get by
a lot easier.

If you'd limit yourself
to a couple of
pork roasts a day,

you wouldn't need
to worry about it.

You heard me.

Some people...

Eddie, how could he
get off?

I seen him.
What?

He's in
the big broad's purse.

Yeah, this is Carl in .

You know anything
about a missing baby?

Boss!
Yeah, I see her!

How can you miss her?
She's as big as a building!

Will you stop it?

Nonchalant.

We'll give her a sandwich.
Give her a sandwich.

She don't need a sandwich.
Look at her.

That's my whole point.

Wait. Wait. Wait.
[ Mumbling ]

[ Chattering ]

Shut up.

[ Laughing ]

Go for it.

Uh-oh.

Eddie?

Get her, Veeko!
You got her, Veek!

Get her, Veek!
Get her, Veeko!

Get her, Veeko!
You got her, Veek!
You got her!

Hang in there.
You got her, baby!

[ Woman ]
Who's next?

Aah!

How about you,
Mr. Comedy?

"We'll give her
a sandwich," huh?

"Big as a building," huh?

Not so easy making jokes
with my fist in your mouth.

I'm not afraid of you.

[ Eddie ]
Come on. She's crazy!

Anybody else
want to take a shot?

[ Growls ]

Chicken!

How did you get out
of Mother Goose Corner?

So, you got
a nasty little
surprise for me?

You guys
are worthless!

Yeah, right, Eddie.
Blame us!

You know,
I'm getting sick
of your insults.

[ Eddie ]
Then why don't you quit?

Oh, yeah. Let you two
have all the money.

What money?
The kid is gone!

There you go,
my little
escape artist.

If you were a baby
lost in the big city,

where would you go?

$ . . Okay.
For you.

Thanks.

Oh, thank you.

Mom, baby.

Speculation that
a ransom figure...

in the millions
of dollars was
mentioned.

Security is tight
around the Cotwell
mansion...

and at Cotwell
Industry Towers
downtown.

Ronnie Lee has more
on the story.
Ronnie.

There's no official word
from police,

but our sources tell us...

that a nine-month-old
baby boy was abducted...

at approximately :
this morning.

We have confirmed
that a photographer
and two assistants...

from the Downtown
Baby Photographers
studio...

were scheduled
to photograph
the missing child...

at the Wallington Hills
estate today.

A spokesman for
the photography studio
declined to comment.

[ Belches ]

[ Ronnie ]
Extremely tight
on the block.

In fact, police
and FBI units...

have essentially
sealed off the area.

Earlier I attempted
to reach millionaire
Bennington Cotwell...

at his downtown office.

Though reporters
were turned away,

a reliable source
informed us that Cotwell
had left by motorcade.

Boo-boo!

The spokesman for the company
said that Mr. Cotwell
was unavailable.

Whoop!

Hang on a second.

Keep rolling.

Okay.

Aah!
Aah!

[ Woman ]
Be very careful.
They're fragile.

Be sure they don't
tip over now.

No, don't.
Not this one.

[ Ronnie ]
Even when what
they're looking for...

is right under their nose.

And, uh...

I think that will be
too crowded.

[ Engine Starts ]

Hey!

Ugh!

You know, we're always,
like, this close.

[ Rings ]

[ Rings ]

Hello.

Hello, is this
Mr. Cotwell?

Yes. Who is this?

My name's Depke.
Depke, Joe. Joe Depke.

Yeah, listen.

I might have
some information...

on the whereabouts
of that child.

Take cover and cordon off
the other end of the street.

Shut off the corner!

We're going to need
all you people
as witnesses.

I seen the baby.

Where?

Right across
the street
on the curb.

Where'd he go?
Where'd he go?

It's the craziest thing.
I don't remember.

Maybe we'll take
a little ride.
See if you remember then.

You want money.

Don't embarrass me.
Don't insult me.

Please. Your money's
no good here.
Put it away.

Where's the baby?

House across the street.

Second floor.

McCray's.
No guarantee.

Listen, mister,
I didn't know your kid!

I just saw
his picture on TV!

I called
because I care!

Your name's McCray?

Yeah.
What did I do?

We're looking
for a missing child.

These are my kids.

You don't mind
if we take a look?

Hello, ma'am.

Hi.

Sir, in here!

Baby.

You have
a beautiful little boy.

Thank you, ma'am.

I'll pray he comes
back to you.

These kids
are all I've got,

so I know how
I'd feel if I was
in your place.

I hope you never are...

for your children's sake.

[ Baby Cries ]

Sorry we
inconvenienced you.

I'll be with you
in a second.

I'm sorry
for the trouble.

Sir?

I believe in my heart...

that someone
somewhere...

watches over the baby.

Yes, I hope so.

You have everything?
Are you sure
you have everything?

Boo-boo!

[ Eddie ]
I can't believe this!

You know, it ain't
the wisest strategy
to kidnap a baby,

then let the damn thing
loose on the streets.

Babies
crawling in traffic
tend to draw attention,

don't you think?

To the-- to the--
to the left, I think.
See? The cab!

Excuse us!
Excuse you?

Got you now, you little--

Aha!

Aah!

Eddie!

My money!

[ Horn Honks ]

[ Cabbie ]
What, I park in your space?

Come on. Come on.
[ Horn Honks ]

Wait, wait. Wait.
Wait for the cars.

There he is!
There he is! Right there!

Go! Go ahead!

Okay. Hang on.

Eddie!
Eddie, Eddie!

Go!

Don't go!

Go! Go!

Right now!
Watch your feet!

I got a plan.
Wait!
Stay there!

Excuse me. Go!
No, wait!

[ Screaming ]

Let's move!

[ Screaming ]

[ Crash ]

I worked at Burger King
three years.

This is worse
than that.

Don't blame me.

We'd be resting easy
if butterfingers here
hadn't lost the kid!

I lost the kid?
I lost the kid?
That's news to me.

Who put himself to sleep
reading the kid's
nursery story?

Who left
the window open?

That was me.

You idiots are the reason
we don't got the kid.

As far as I'm concerned,
you can drop out now,

and I'll keep
the five million myself.

Frankly, you don't
deserve a penny!

You'd stiff us.
Wait a minute.
Wait a minute!

Don't get hot, Eddie.
Don't get hot.

We're all just a little tired
from getting all torn apart.

Oh, like I like
to fall off buildings
and jump in ditches.

That's the breaks.
We're dealing with a baby.

Babies are obviously more
dangerous than we thought.

Go figure, Eddie.
They're so small!

When I boxed,
the guys I most feared...

were the ones
who feared nothing.

Babies are like that.
They ain't afraid
of nothing.

Baby tracks.

Norby.

[ Grunts ]

Boo-boo!

[ Screaming ]

- [ Growling ]
- [ Screaming ]

[ Screeching ]

[ Screaming ]

[ Laughing ]

[ Continues Laughing ]

The kid's
in the gorilla cage.

There's goes our
five million bucks, huh?

No. I think the ape
likes the kid.

What?

You got long arms.

Thanks.

I can't reach it,
Eddie.

That's it.
You got it.

Okay. Now come
over here.

That's it.
That's it.

Easy does it.

That's it.
That's it.

Slow, slow, slow.

Easy.
Uh-oh.

That's it.
Nice monkey.

Nice monkey.

Yes. Yes.

There you go.

[ Crying ]

He's starting
to cry, Eddie.

He's going to make
the monkey mad.

Uh, Eddie.
He's getting up.

I'm afraid, Eddie.

Veek, please, please,
just stare him down.

Stare him down.

Boo-boo.

That's it.

Aah!

Aah!

Aah!

Ooh! Aah!

[ Screeching ]

[ Animals Screeching ]

Shut up!

[ Growls ]

Hey, King Kong. Hey.

Hey, over here.

I'm a banana.

I'm a coconut.

I'm an entire fruit salad.

Over here. Hey, hey!
Look, I'm the jungle boy.

Over here. That's it.
That's it.

Now you got it.

I got him.

I got him.

[ Roars ]

That's a bad monkey.
Bad monkey!

[ Roars ]

Aah!

[ Snoring ]

[ Roars ]

[ Screaming ]

Aah!

Eddie?

Careful, Eddie.

Aah! Ah-ah-ah!

[ Baby Laughs ]

Eddie?

I know you don't want
to hear this, but...

the kid's gone again.

I'll get it.

This morning, all I wanted
was my baby's picture
in the paper.

I got my wish.

Where's your mommy?

Hey, Eddie,
maybe he went down
a rabbit hole.

We're serious
about our work.

You want to
make jokes,
join the circus.

Bozo.

Oh!

Step on it, Eddie.

Baby, starboard side.

Starboard.
What?

Port. Port, port, port.

Point!

Point!
Nine o'clock.

[ Eddie ]
Where is he?

He's over there.
: !

Step on it.

[ Laughs ]
You're ours now,
moneybags.

Left!

Did Baby Bink miss
his Uncle Eddie?

Come here!

Get him!

Did you get him?

No! Come on!

Where'd he go?

He went down
a rabbit hole.

Careful those rabbits don't
chew your face off, Ed.

Shut up, Veeko.
Just shut up!

No problem, fellas.

It ain't a hole.
It's a tunnel.

And what's every
tunnel got?

Ooh! Don't tell me.
I know, I know.

It's uh, uh, uh...

Tollbooth at the end.

Are you always
this stupid,

or do you do this
just to annoy me?

A tunnel has two ends.

This one's here,
and the other one's--

Where?
Where?

Eddie, Eddie, Eddie!

[ Eddie ]
Get him, Norby!
Get him!

Don't let him get away!

Here he is, Eddie.

[ Laughing ]

Today ain't your lucky day,
eh, shorty pants?

That wasn't so hard.

Beautiful day, huh?

You know anything
about that vehicle?

Yes. It belongs to us.

You left the engine running.

Yes.

I did.

I've been having--

baaa-ttery trouble.

We just stopped by
to admire the beautiful--

beautiful flo-- ow--

wers.

Have you guys,
uh, seen a baby
around here?

The park is full of...

babies?

Yeah, well,
there's been
a kidnapping.

Well, that's
a crying shame.

It's amazing
what people will
do for money.

Yeah, for five million.

If we see anything...

[ Burps ]

Excuse me.

If we see anything,

we'll be sure to notify--

Oh.

Ohh.

Ohh.

Ohh!

Ohh!

Ohh.

What?

Ohhh.

Ooh.

Ahh. Ah-ah-ah!

Aah.

[ Norby ]
Got a bad heart.

Ohh!

Excuse me.

The police.

Thank you.

Walk them to the car.

My entire reproductive system
is about to go up in flames.

Is that a Fleetline van?

Eddie?

Is-- Is it?

Yes.

Yep.
Yes, it is.

I thought so.

My brother drives
one of those...

for this dry cleaning
firm he's with.

Oh, yeah. They drive
a lot of those.

Louie's had a lot
of trouble with his.

And-- give me a second.

I'll think of what he said
is the problem with the, uh,

electrical system.

Alternator?

No.

Carburetor?

No.

There's this little
relay thing...

Veeko!

Veeko...

I think you should
move the van.

I have a frog
in my throat.

Okay.

And a brush fire
in my undershorts.

Get them out of here!

It's just a bad battery.

I think we should move it
before the engine dies.

Yeah, it's just
the battery.

Come on. Let's--

[ Sniffing ]

[ Sniffs ]

You sure can tell
summer's here.

People got those
barbecues going.

[ Sniffs ]

Smells great,
doesn't it?

Come on, let's go
move the van.

I'll be right with you.

I just have a cramp
in my leg.

Aah.

[ Horn Honks ]

Take it easy.

[ Horn Honks ]

Aah!

Aah!

No! No, it's okay.!

Aah! Aah!

I got it!

Eddie!

Aah!

Aah! Oh! Aah!

Oh! Oh! Aah!

Aah!

That's how you
put out campfires.

Is that... a fact?

I used to do it
in Boy Scouts.

You toasted
your marshmallows...

over a pile
of flaming gonads?

We usually used logs.

Follow that kid!

We'll meet you
on the other side.

I'm sorry, man,
but it was
an emergency.

You were blazing
pretty hard--

Shut up!

Oh, boy, Eddie.

You got burned clear through
your skivvies.

[ High Voice ]
Baby Bink!

It's your mother.

Baby Bink.

I'll k*ll him.
I'll k*ll him.

I'll k*ll him.
I'll k*ll him.

I'll k*ll him.
I'll k*ll him.

[ Clears Throat ]

I'm sorry, ma'am.

I haven't forgotten
your feelings.

Oh.

My feelings
don't matter.

Yes, they do.

They do very much.

The love my baby's gotten
has been as much yours as mine.

Probably more.

Where's my little boy?

What's he doing?

If he were home,

he'd be going down
for his nap.

[ Snoring ]

[ Snoring ]

Ah!

Ahh.

[ Horn Honks ]

[ Engine Stops, Backfires ]

Uh, I got bad news.

The kid's...

in there.

No, wait.
You can't go in there.

There's a guard-- Eddie, no!
Eddie, wait! No!

There's a guard!

He's asleep,
you moron.

Where is he?

Come on, knucklehead!
Where is he? Huh?

Of course.

Where else would you be?

Let's go get him.

Eddie.

Baby, o'clock.

Uh... up there.

We'll be with you
in just a minute.

Lingerie,
home furnishings,

men's hats,

babies.

[ Norby ]
Wait a minute. We passed him.

[ Eddie ]
Exactly, moron.

We'll grab him
as he goes by.

That's a good plan, Ed.
We grab him as he comes by.

You grab him.

I grab him?

Right.

As the girder comes up,

you jump out on it
and grab the baby.

Me? By myself?

Just step out on it.
It ain't difficult.

Why me?

Norby is scared
of heights.

Why don't you
grab him?

Nobody asked me!

Oh.

Okay, okay.

Good.

That's it.
Don't miss it!

I'll get it.

Don't miss it!
He's coming.

All right!

I'm not touching it.
There it is!

Go!

Okay.

Aha.

Whoa.

Here he comes.
Get him!

How'd he do that?

Baby luck.

Eddie! Help me!

He asked for you, Ed.

He ain't thinking
straight.

Don't look down.

What are you doing?
Eddie, don't!

Eddie, no!
I'm going to faint!

- Didn't I tell you
not to look down?
- Pull me back, please!

I'm losing my grip.

Pull me back, please.

Grab him by the leg
or I'll let you go!

Don't look down.

Okay, we got him, Ed.

There you go.
Okay, good. You got him.

Up! Up!

You're going
the wrong way!

Up! Up!

Rest on my feet!

I could use a hand here!

Hey, quit being
a crybaby!

Get up!

Aah!

Not down. Up!
Where you going?

Ahh.

You're doing good.

You got to get back up.

- I'm losing him, Eddie.
- Quit fooling around!

Give me a hand.

Oh, what's the matter
with you?

Aah!

Ed?

Eddie?

Get off of me!

- There he is!
- There he is.

Come on!
We'll take the stairs.

Aah!

Ohh.

It's coming back down.
Get ready.

Jump, jump.

Okay, I'll wait
for another.

Jump. Jump.

Jump!

[ Thud ]

My...

spine.

Huh?

Aah!

I lived.

Get back up here!

[ Baby Laughs ]

Come here, you little
ball of grief!

Now I got you!

You ain't gonna crawl away
from this one.

Hee hee.

Aah!

Oww! That hurt!

[ Giggling ]

Ohh!

Ow!

That hurt!

Ow!

That's it!

No mercy!

[ Groans ]

This ain't no nursery school
battle of wits anymore.

This is my ' " of guile,
gut and gristle...

versus your
two-and-a-half feet
of goo-goos,

gagas and giggles!

Aah!

If the Milwaukee mob
couldn't k*ll me,

no milk-puking little
thumbsucker's...

got a candle's chance
in a cyclone...

of getting
the better of me.

[ Giggling ]

Where you going?

Come back here.

[ Giggling ]

This isn't funny anymore.

My money!

Huh?

Huh? Ahh.

Whoa!

What?

I thought I saw a baby
crawl around the corner.

Good night, Donald.

Norby!

Veeko!

[ Veeko ]
Hey!

We're down here!

Hey, Ed!

We'd better go
before I dry!

[ Veeko ]
Ed, can you see the baby
from up there?

Just hang on,
and we'll come on up.
I got an idea.

We've got some news.

I don't know if it's good,
but it's not bad.

Since the media broke the story,
calls have been coming in.

There's was a report of a man
looking for a lost baby
on a bus this morning.

A baby missing
from a department store
care center.

Another at :
at the zoo.

Shortly after that,
at a downtown park.

And a final report,
not long ago, at--

A building
under construction.

Yeah, that's right.

He's doing everything
in the book.

I know where he is.

"Before returning home
for supper,

"Nanny and Baby Boo...

stopped at the
old soldier's home
to visit Mr. Tinsel."

That's where he is.

Boo-boo.

[ Man On TV ]
They're back, Frank.

...

...

...

...

.

[ Baby Coos ]

Well!

Hey.

[ Laughing ]
Come on over.

It's the kid!

On television.
The one that--

Aw.

Oh.

Come on, hon.
That's it. Come on.

* This is the army
Mr. Jones *

* No private rooms
or telephones *

* You had your breakfast
in bed before *

* But you won't get it
there anymore *

* This is the army
Mr. Brown *

* You and your baby
went to town *

* She had you worried *

* But this is w*r *

* And she won't
worry you anymore *

* No, she won't worry you *

* Anymore **

Oh, baby.

You had quite
an adventure today.

Boo-boo.

Boo-boo?

It's what he calls
his book.

He lost it today.

We'll get you
another one, sweetheart.

[ Gasps ]

Boo-boo!

What?

Ooh!

What?

Oh, I see.
That's nice.

Boo-boo.

That's not a boo-boo.

That's a clock,
a ticktock.

Was there a ticktock
in his book?

No.

Well, he's pointing to--

He's pointing to--

His boo-boo. He's not
pointing at the ticktock.

He's pointing to his boo-boo.
He wants his boo-boo.

I thought he was getting
a new boo-boo.

He means
his boo-boo's back there.
That's where he's been.

Radio Rogers and McCloskey.
Tell them to turn around.

We're going back
to the ticktock
to get the boo-boo.

And send for backup.

Boo-boo! Boo-boo!

Hey, Eddie.

Sure you don't
wanna go check to see
if they left the money?

Oh, that's a good idea.

We get the living hell
tore out of us by a baby.

Three fully-grown men
versus fifteen pounds...

of pink flesh
with a mouth.

Now, what chance
you think we got...

of strolling
into that alley...

and coming out with
anything less than
years in prison?

No, thank you!

This is a hexed situation.

We walk away
while we're still ahead.

We took a lickin'
and kept on tickin'.

We'll go back to banks.

Dealing with grownups.

I don't want
no kiddie stuff.

We did all right with banks.

Or a convenience store
every once in a while.

Keep things interesting.

You know, one thing
I learned from all this--

I ain't never gonna have
any kids of my own.

[ Norby Chuckles ]
Yeah.

Seeing as you burnt down
the only tree in your forest,

I wouldn't worry about it.

Oh. Oh.

Why don't you shut up?

I don't want to ever hear
another word...

about that rotten,
snake-bit baby.

Boo-boo!

I'm serious.

Boo-boo!

I'm hearing
that little vermin
in my thoughts.

I want to erase him
from my mind.

Boo-boo!
[ Laughing ]

Did you hear that?

[ Veeko ]
Yeah.

Know what it sounds like?

Boo-boo, boo-boo,
boo-boo, boo-boo.

Boo-boo.

He's back.

Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow.

You dirty, no-good
little stool pigeon!

You're surrounded.

Throw down the boo-boo.

And put your hands
over your heads.

This is the end
of the story.

Good night, sweetheart.

Good night, Bink.

[ Giggles ]

[ Mother ]
Did I tell you?

The baby's
having his picture
taken tomorrow.

Say hello to Old Willy for me.

I will.