Asterix and Obelix vs. Caesar (1999)

[bunniefuu]

Caesar! Caesar! Caesar! Caesar!

Soldiers, the soothsayers
have pronounced themselves.

For the next moon,
We will inv*de the Great Britain.

Caesar! Caesar!

Soldiers, the entire world is looking at you.

For the glory of Rome.

Caesar! Caesar! Caesar!

All Around The Country.

To the smaller town,
pay the Caesar's tax.

Caesar! Caesar! Caesar!

You promised To talk with him.
Talking of what?

You Know It very well. Of that Gallic town
that keeps on offering resistance.

To Caesar that Gallic town
he cares a pepper.

- You Have something else that to do.
- we'll see. I will talk with him.

If you do it, I tell him that you resell part...

Of the foodstuff of the army
to make a palace in Rome for you.

- It is lie.
- I have proofs.

Ah, good.
What do you say?

You Are worse than me, Detritus.

How flattering.

Do You Find Funny my discourse, Detritus?

No, no, Cesar.
Of course not, he is than...

The fact is that Trolebus remembered
Belgians one of my histories.

Which One?

Come closer.

Go.

Look at me.

To the eyes.

You hide something from me.

Hiding something, me?

Caesar! I swear it to you for Trolebus's head.

And good you know how much
I appreciate his friendship.

Yes, that they throw Trolebus into
the lions if I tell lies. That!

soldiers!

Why did we not manage to defeat those Gauls?

What does that town have of special?

I Understand that its very normal little town.

That it is similar to any
another Gallic town.

Guard, open the door,
its my cousin with the ox.

Open ! Hello cousin.
How is it going?

Approach! Come closer! come and look. Look!
Yes, look!

Look, come closer.
Fresh, very cheap fish.

Come here, fresh fish.
Come, fresh fish.

- Yes, a moment.
- It is fresh, come closer, yes.

Come, come closer that is fresh.
It is fresh. It is rich and cheap.

What do you want? I already seen it.
Look at... You Are Fantastic, hey!

I Must Tell To myself
That my husband has gotten fat lately.

I took it into account.
I reinforced everything.

Then, prove it.
Yes.

Come, we go.
Yes!

Up!

How's it going?
Go Vercingétorix!

I would liked to be an artist.

Shut up, bard!

Its not fresh, you keep it.

What? My fish is not fresh?

Try smell it.
Look that how good the smell.

- Your fish is not fresh.
- That is not fresh?

Smell my fish.
My fish is fresh.

Maybe u can't smell that well?
Doesnt smell of the sea?

No its not fresh.
Yes it is fresh.

No its not fresh.
Yes it is fresh.

No, it is not fresh.
Yes, yes it is fresh.

No it is not fresh!
Yes it is fresh!

No it is not fresh! No it is not fresh!
Yes it is fresh! Yes it is fresh!

No, it is not fresh.

- Edadepiédrix.
- Ah, a fight. I go wanna go there.

Edadepiédrix your no longer young.
Your 80 years old, My love.

Leave me in alone of your the desires.

Fresh or no, I don't want anymore.

A stork.

Have taken me for a butterfly, Ordenalfabétix?

Forgive, Panorámix.
I was distracted.

- The fish eye's!
- Is it fresh?

I said That; it is not fresh.

A great danger threatens the village.

Its written in the eye. Look!

It Is a sign, a bad spirit wants to harm to us.

It is nearby.
I feel their presence.

That the gods come to help us.

Open the doors.

Talk Caius Bonus,
tell it to me everything.

They Have a w*apon secret, Governor.
A magical potion.

A magical potion?
Good, do take me a fool or what?

I wouldnt dare, Governor.

A druid manufactures it and they
become invincible when drinking it.

lnvencibles?

yes, it is a secret
give by their ancestors.

For Jupiter.

If somebody discover that secret
would be the master of the world.

For That Reason I did not tell it to nobody.

Imagine you conquer the other towns...

You Have Done Good.
I love to be master of the world!

How long does the effect of
that magical potion last?

About 10 minutes.

Then they have to ask the druid for more potion.

Now you. Cut off the supplies
of the magic potion.

Gather the necessary soldiers.

I thought of it,
but there is a problem.

- A problem?
- Yes, enormous.

A colossal Gaul that doesn't
need to drink the potion again.

He fell in the pot full of
the magic potion when still a baby.

Neutralize him.
Set him a trap.

Hypothenús will build it to you.
He is my engineer.

No will be easy. He never separates
from his friend that is very clever.

No worries, Hypothenús is true child genius.

Do You Hear? It is going to rain.
The sky is as good as covered.

If you continue that way,
you will touch the sky with the menhir's tip.

Do you believe?

Yes, and if you tear it it could
fall down to us on

Don't say that, be quiet!
Its the only thing that makes me panic.

And you will fall with a loud sound.
shut up !

I am kidding.
I do not find it funny.

You walk normal, that your jokes.

Never it is a common knowledge.
I prefer not to take the risk.

Let's go.let's go.let's go.

Here Asterix and Obelix rest.
Need to write yes,yes?

The lions adore
to the intellectuals.

Yes, they are more gentle
than the centurions.

- If the Romans saw you.
- The Romans, the Romans.

Not one to be seen in these past 15 days.
Not an ambush, or anything.

They no longer want to play, you hit them too hard,
and you you humiliate them.

Do I humiliate them?
Yes,a little.

They destroy Carthage, the entire world,
the fact that you fear them conquer.

And a fat uncle gives them beatings.

A fat uncle?
Yes.

What fat uncle?
Who do you speak of?

No, I meant a magnificent athlete named Obélix.

Ah, good.

Arrive already.

- Rest stop? No.
- No, is an Obélix grave tablet.

Are we dead?
No, not yet.

But I don't like this.

Now... we drop it
on the head.

Already! Flat
as cockroaches.

Six months... i waited this!
6 times humiliations and beatings!

The idea of the rock
was it quite original, no?

Architect, I triplicate your salary.

It good that i was fat,yeah?

And you, unyielding Gallic,
I will sell your entrails.

Oh, no. It can't be.
Its not possible!

For Pluto, its a nightmare.
Its a nightmare!

Now!

You also help.
and what do you believe that I do?

I filled it with magical potion before leaving.
How lucky!

Give me a bit.

No, you already fell in
the pot as a baby.

Enough.

It is necessary to do something.
Soldiers, get on the rock, to the rock.

Caius Bonus. Oh Caius Bonus. My friend!

What happen? Caius Bonus, do you no longer
want to play with your friends?

How idiotic!
You would get bored without us.

You have a very beautiful voice.

and you also sings well.

Iam not to blame,
Iam just following orders.

We do have good time together, no?

Yes. We did give a good beatings.

Yes, yes, but you hits me & my men too strong.

It can be controlled.
Do you promise it, Obélix?

Can't promises anything,
but I will try.

Then Caius Bonus,
think of it as a warning to your soldiers.

And next week we mount ourselves a good one.

The idea Caius Bonus gives is not very valiant,
but yes imaginative?

They tried to crush a rock on on top of our
head.

See, they push the enormous rock down.

We seriously believe it fell fom the sky.

Hey, Obélix?

Have you eaten more than enough?

More than enough?
Its only my third boar.

Pardon,you only eaten up 3.
For sure you eat up 3 more, no?

No, only two.
At night I have my dinner fast.

Look at you, don't you think
that you are quite fat?

A little full. Still the same.

Who is she?
What do you mean who is she?

Don't you recognize her? It is Falbalá.

Falbalá! The small Falbalá?
The small...?

Yes.
Looks different.

Yes, It was 8 years ago when
she went to study in Lutecia.

Yes that has changed.
Yes, she has grown a little bit.

And it has gain some kilos,
and well distributed.

Obélix!

She recognized you.
Yes, Oh, Falbalá!

My dear Obélix!
So happy see you again.

Because, you have changed so much.
I didn't recognized you.

On the other hand you look same,
with some more kilos.

No, no, no.
Only just a bit full.

A little bit? Right, that is.
A little bit full.

Falbalá!
A little bit full!

Ah, what wonderful smell!
I will eat up your boar.

Eat up it, I am not deaf.
What do you what you like?

Do you reject a boar?
Are you sick? How are you?

Very well. Why? She does look that more
beautiful at night, aint she?

Do you not smell the perfume in the she gives?

Full moon!
Never have ive seen it.

You know that coquetuela it is
the one that puts you in this state?

Coquetuela? Of whom do you talk?
Of Falbala, evidently.

Take care of what you say.
No one talks about Falbalá this way.

Well, unhand me,
by Tutatis you want to choke me.

Well, apology, apology.

Falbalá is not a coquetuela.
Falbalá is... it is Falbalá!

For Falbalá?

Will you take it with a chain around the neck?

- A menhir to give commitment.
- What?

- Will you request her hand in marriage?
- For sure.

Are you crazy.
Falbalá is not the girl for you.

Why?

Doesn't make good couple,
that is to say, I'm refering physically.

You don't understand what women want.

They don't care about the physique.
What counts is the love.

We'll See. Look at who you come.
Falbala.

- Is it his brother the thin guy?
- Her brother?

Yes, Her brother.
Looks, he kisses her.

Not like a brother kisses
to their sister, Obélix.

Then it might her cousin.

Oh, please!
Don't you see that its her boyfriend...

Better you propose another day.

Its her boyfriend?
Yes, her boyfriend.

Thin guy.
Yes... Very thin.

Lets go eat.

Open for the great treasurer Melosinus.

Come to collect the tax.
It will spend here the night.

Open up.

You can go already.

Come back tomorrow morning.

You, we don't pay overtimes.

I like to finish what I begin.
I sleep better this way.

Close the doors.

I want it.

Imbecile. There's lot more in the chest.

But the chest is not ours.

Tomorrow it will be.

For Tutatis, the gods are in a bad mood tonight.

Me too.

So eat correctly
or i will do for you.

No. That no!

- Have you loss your appetite?
- I'm on diet.

Diet? You?
Yes.

You are right.
I am a little bit full.

Who is ? Who are you ?

Fortune teller Prólix,
with my assistants Alámbix and Anorésix.

Enter.

Boss, a fortune-teller and their assistants
request hospitality for today.

A fortune-teller?
Arrives in a good time. Let him enter.

Another swindler that wants
to eat and to sleep free.

Dont be so suspicious!

I have some questions
for the fortune-teller.

Welcome to our village.

We knew that we would be
very received.

Where do you read the future, fortune-teller?

In a good hot soup
and in lukewarm beer.

How original.

Arrive in good moment.
Karabella.

What, what, what, what?
Did you see something?

I see a treasure.
A treasure?

Treasure!

An enormous treasure will arrive
to your village.

Karabella, it serves why our friend is here.

There are Roman around the treasure.
Many Romans.

Are the Romans for me, yes?

Seize the treasure.
It is a good idea.

And later? continue!

We party in Lutecia.

I know a stupendous restaurant.

I can't see anything.

In here somebody emits
a negative waves.

My decoder one doesn't work.
There is no image.

Astérix, go away.
Me? Why?

Its an order.

Already return. I have it.
Yes? What do you see? What do you see?

With this treasure
you will lift an army.

And you will expel the
the Romans from Gaul.

You heard that Karabella?

You have married the new Vercingétorix.

Well, and like you are the cause,
go look the fire for the wood.

I have a friend very in love with a young boy...

You want to know if
she will marry him.

How did you guessed it?

I am a fortune-teller.
Yes, it is certain.

Astérix!

Astérix... You know what
did the fortune-teller tell me?

- That you will marry Falbalá.
- Yes, are you also a fortune-teller too?

- No, They are swindlers.
- No he's not a swindler.

He has seen that Falbalá loves me.

I tell you that Falbalá
will marry Tragicómix.

Falbalá loves me.
What already happens does not count.

I would have said it.
Love is delicate.

Do you understand?
It is like a flower.

Time are necessary so that
she will able to blossom.

Oh, yes!

Undoubtedly don't understand anything.
You never understood anything. Anything!

You drive me crazy.
You drive me crazy.

You drive me crazy, Obelix!

The Romans. The marines.
The Romans. The Romans.

The Romans. The rom... The Romans?
The Romans are there!

Romans!

Druid!prepare the magic potion.

The Romans have arrived.
The Romans.

Dejádmelos, they are not more than 20.
You are selfish.

I have left 3 drops,
it will be enough.

For pity, for pity,
Don't you enter that village.

For last time, this is madness.

You are indeed crazy, centurion.

Do know with whom you speak?
I am the treasurer of the counties.

Collector of the tax for Caesar.

These Gauls drink a magic potion
that makes them invincible.

They will tear you into pieces!

You are being delirious.
Separate from my road.

Welcome, Roman.
thanks, Gaul.

Ive come to get paid
for the tax to give Caesar.

No worries, the money
it will be used well.

It will use to build roads.

Maintainance for the army that will
protect you from your enemies.

and to cover the deficit.

Well, very well. That is...
That is the minimum thing.

You honor us a lot that for
accepting our modest contribution.

Astérix, Obélix, give him the tax for Caesar.

What is that?

What the Roman soldiers abandon in the
b*ttlefield,

Every time that we face them.

That don't bothers to run.

In a blacksmith, the price for metal,
you can get a good bargain.

It would also be an interest
to an antique dealer.

With this helmet a oil lamp can be made.

And this armor can be use
as mold to make cookies.

Raze the village!

My treasure! My treasure!
Oh, my treasure!

Never spoke this way to me.
Not even when we were engaged.

To my arms, fortune-teller.
By Tutatis.

Never been heard such an
extraordinary fortune-teller as you.

And now, do tell me, what will it happen?
Say it! Say it!

Iam not fortune-teller,
but I will tell it to you.

If we don't return this
treasure at once to Caesar.

We will be presented with all their legions.

That it is presented,
That it is presented!

With their money,
I will create an army.

I plan to wait him here...
And I will conquer him.

Told it to you. This gold will
bring bad luck for our village.

Then, we will vote.

Those that you want the treasure, to the right.

Those that want to return it, to the left.

I want the money, but not to lose a friend.
I abstain.

Result gives the voting:
We keep the treasure!

Yes! Well! Well!

Did you call me, Caesar?

They have stolen the money from the taxes.

What? How dare you? Miserable!

No... Its not Malosinus.

He fell in an ambush that
the Gauls set him.

And yet you still live?

Did u not defended the money
of the Caesar give until the end?

Unfortunate!

Those Gauls live in the town
that resists to my legions.

For months.
Do you already know it?

Do you already know it?
Iam speaking to you, Detritus.

To me Detritus,
Whom the Caesar speaks.

Good, it is a town. Let us say a village better,
and even this way...

Why you have not told me anything?

Don't want to bother the great Caesar
for a small matter.

A small matter.

A small matter!

They rebel against the Caesar.

They resist to the Roman legions.

Not happy with not paying
the tribute that they owe me to.

They steal the money of my taxes from me.

And doesn't that have importance?

You are right, Caesar.
It is extremely serious.

I will order them to toss to Malosinus to the lions.
What do you say?

That you prepare my escort.
I leave immediately for Petibónum.

And with Malosinus, what do we do?

If you don't solve this before the next moon.

It will be you to who we toss to the lions.

The Caesar arrives.
The Caesar arrives.

Clear. Get ready.
Everything tidy up. Hurry!

How many are they?
Some 50, approximately.

- And us?
- Close to 500, noble Caesar.

Five hundred?
Yes.

Do tell me centurion,
are you making fun of me by any chance?

And casually do you not make fun of me?

Me? I will explain to it now because I can do it...

No is explanations.
att*ck the village, immediately!

Obélix, you will be my
personal guard commander.

To your orders, Abraracúrcix.

And I name Asurancetúrix

- Yes?
- Minister of Culture.

Remain silent you, be quiet!

And me, what will I be, hey?

You will be Minister
of the Former Combatants.

Of the Former Combatants?
Why does the Former one give?

I want to be the combatants.

High!

Its for the Gauls.
They will recognize me this way.

Form the turtle!

Ministry of Supplies it will be
held by Ordenalfabétix.

Of supplies?
But if their fish is not fresh.

Boss. Boss!
What?

Anything for Astérix?

I have forgotten of him.

He will have the Ministry
of the National Depression,

of the Systematic Denigración
and of the Environmental Pessimism.

I think that will be enough.

Astérix, what are you doing?

Returning that is of Caesar.

He drank the magic potion.

Obélix, brings back the treasure.
Bring back the treasure!

- Yes.
- Bring back the treasure! Obélix.

But, what are they doing?

Are you crazy?

They make fun of me.

Astérix, return it. Boss!

Help, Help Obélix. Help him!

att*ck!

Turtles, ahead.
Going!

Gauls, to me, Gaul!
The Romans att*ck.

Drink all the magic potion.

For Tutatis!

att*cks! att*cks!

Turtles! att*ck!

This way! This way!

No sleeping.

Return to combat!
Close the doors!

There, there.
No, no. There it is Caius Bonus.

att*ck, att*ck!
If not, to the lions.

- Somebody inside?
- Answer when ask.

How educated.

Those Gauls are some true savages.

Some savages.

But, they make sense
of the rhythm they give, hey?

Leave me one, leave me one.

Edadepiédrix, it is harmful for your heart.

My treasure, I beg it to you.
Listen, no!

Leave alone me.

Come, grandfather, have a good time.

He will harm you.
It is all mine.

- Still agile.
- Yes.

My pequeñín!

You have broken to my pequeñín.

No effect from the potion?
I forgot to take it.

Memory goes.

- The Romans.
- Wait, waits. Look, Bonus!

Surrender, Gaul!
And I will spare your life.

Yes.

- For me. Here, here, here!
- Yes, for you.

Look, Astérix, there is some very new,
very handsome.

- How handsome they are those Romans.
- No, no, no!

Get the Romans!

That face looks familiar to me.
Me too.

Don't know.

Hey, the one that with
the laurel crown above the head.

Me?
Yes. look to the side.

How dare the barbarian speak to me.

- Terrible.
- But if he is Julio.

For Tutatis, you are right.
He is Julius Caesar.

Old Julio.

Do tell me, and your army?
We will have a good time a while.

Don't mock or he will send all his army to us.

Dont ask him anything.

Leave. Hey, Julio, waits...
We want to laugh a bit more.

But... Oh, Julio.
You have offended him, Obélix.

Release me!
I have a new song.

Prólix, when will the gaul is free.

I will name you prefect
General of Counties.

You knew him.
Ah, yes. How silly am I.

So,let's drink in honor of the
greatest of the fortune tellers.

For our friend Prólix.

Don't put that face.

No, I refuse to drink
for that viper.

Now, I guess,
you speak to us now of my destiny.

I see you encircled by Roman.
I see you triumphant. I see you in Rome.

Rome! And what am i to do in Rome?
Speak, speak, quickly!

You are what you believe, hey?

There are interferences.
Again the negative waves.

Well, expert.
The negative waves will walk away.

No, no. wait.
I want to speak with both.

You should reconcile.
This is an order.

- Iam not asking anything else.
- Have you heard what I said?

I am not deaf.

- To finish this, you should kiss yourselves.
- Oh, no.

You should do it.

Among us, four.

- How it itches!
- How beautiful, yes; very beautiful.

In our tadition, when two men reconcile.

They should share tortilla for friendship.

What beautiful tradition.
Karabella, bring me eggs.

Something against the mushrooms Astérix?

If they are not poisonous, no.

Not to worry.
I will eat as many as you.

After eating up
the tortilla of friendship.

I will speak to you of your future.

Please, please.

Delicious.

I love it.

Obélix, please imitate Caesar
above their horse again.

If I do it it will be already
done it more than 20 times.

Please!

Caesar, Caesar, Caesar, Caesar!

Can't eat it no more.
No, you must finish it.

Its tradition. Here we go, here we go.

Finish already...
Now, we are already really friends.

Are you well?
I feel hot.

The heat of friendship.

Look at me, Astérix, and listen to me.

- Do you hear me, Astérix?
- I hear you.

Julio Caesar is my worst enemy.
Repeat!

Julio Caesar is my worst enemy.

I will put an end to him.

I will put an end to him.

Obélix, make it for me, please.

You have already heard it.

Julio was there, looking fantastic.
Sitting down in their white horse.

Being encircled by their escort. He looks at me.
I look him; that is to say, we look cross-eyed.

And I say, by Tutatis.
I have seen that face somewhere.

Took out a coin, and I look at it.

He was looking at the other side,
and the coin was looking at the reverse side.

Can you see it?
Caesar has come to challenge you here.

Among your villagers.
This is intolerable!

You cannot tolerate this!

should put an end to him.

should put an end to him!

In my Opinion, they did not say
that i've had repressed my blows.

- Get down of the horse, Caesar.
- Come look at a Gaul.

You will pay for the damage
that you've done to Gaul, you miserable.

How dare the barbarian speak to me.

Wait, I will help you down.

- What happen to him?
- Who knows?.

What is happening to him?
He's acting strange.

Ah, Caesar!

It bounce?

Iam not Caesar! Don't you recognize me?
I am Obélix, your friend.

- I will destroy, Caesar.
- But... Astérix, Astérix.

Don't harm him.

Drinking magic potion has made him
possesed and become crazy.

Impossible, the potion should
not be used to fight among Gaul.

Impossible.

The druid will make the antidote,
I will look for him.

Trying to escape, Caesar.
You are a coward.

Come fight me.
Thats enough.

Druid, make an antidote.
Astérix has become crazy.

Indeed.

This is your end, Caesar.

Look out!

Vercingétorix!

Return to the reality.
I have retaliated!

Come, Its me, Obélix. Now return.
The Great Caesar has surrendered!

Esautomátix looks for
to Asurancetúrix.

Treat the bad influence with
another bad influence.

We need you.

What?
Yes.

Come,plays your song.
It will cure him.

- And you what you want, eunuch?
- To sing for you.

Poor Astérix.

The remedy is violent,
but it can work.

No, Asurancetúrix, for.
Abracacúrcix, make him remain silent.

Obélix, what has happen? But,
why have they gotten me tied up?

You are cured. You recognized me.

You have frightened us.
You confused me with Caesar.

With Caesar?
Yes. Don't you remember?

No. No, no, no, wait.

I remember eating the tortilla
mushroom that Prólix gives.

They were hallucinogenic mushrooms.
Prólix has drugged you.

- Where has it happened, where?
- Has it disappeared?

That viper for sure
have stolen the treasure.

The treasure!

He has taken it!
He has taken it!

Get rid of the good.
Now we will be calm.

Good-bye treasure!
Good-bye Caesar!

I will find the solution to reduce those Gauls.
Not to worry.

Come, I will listen to you.
I am thinking.

How slow.
Wait, waits.

Its coming.
Its coming.

I will help you think.

My Mamma, a real lion.

Hurry up or your you will be
their next banquet.

Already have it, Caesar, I already have it.
It is necessary to neutralize the druid.

This way they won't be able to to prepare
the magic potion that makes them invincible.

And how will we plan this?

In 2 days there's a meeting
of the druids in the region.

In their sacred forest.
This is an ideal occasion to act.

We promised to the druids
that a Roman will never disturb.

In their sacred forest.

The promises that Caesar give
only for those believe them.

I leave a full pot in case
something happen in my absence.

It will be enough.

I don't like that you leave, Panorámix.

With Astérix and Obélix to give escort,
there won't be any risk.

Foward, Obélix.

- Falbalá! I'm going!
- Obélix!

Come, ldeafix.

Lets go, my little bug.

Here the sacred forest begins.

Onlt the druids can pass into here.
Wait here.

Ideafix, warn me if there are any problems.
Now go.

I declare the opening the 2 thousand yers
old ceremony by presenting th Golden Sickle.

As annually, this sickle will be
granted to the best druid among us.

I call to the druid Plantáfix.

My potion gives to that
drinks it a superhuman force.

And during near 10 minutes
it is practically invincible.

You will see, I will choose one at random.

See... Yourself... Yes, you.

Yes, you. Come here.

Come. We go.

Drink. Slowly.

If that is certain,
thanks to your magic potion

We could expel the Romans out of Gaul.

Cannot, because Mathusálix,
my old teacher.

He trusted me the secret of the potion
with the condition of that.

Its is use only to defend,
and not to att*ck.

You will already understand why.
Do you see that rock?

Will you lift it and sustain above your head.

I believe that you all will agree.

This year Panorámix
will take the Golden sickle.

Now, imagine that this man is a vile,
ambitious being.

And without scruples,
or worse still that is a Roman.

Ohh yes, I am a Roman.

Guards!

Want some?

You were happier when
you didn't go on diet.

Although if you lose weight,
Falbalá won't marry you.

Falbalá doesn't love you.
She loves Tragicómix.

You say it because you are jealous.
You are crazy.

One day you will find somebody.

And then you will understand what is to love,
and to be loved.

Now eat a bit.

Dont die of hunger because of her.

Good, only a bite.

What it happen ldeafix? Panorámix.
Did something happen to Panorámix?

Its forbidden, but it is necessary to go.
Give me.

Now it is not the moment.
We go now, hurry up.

Where are you?

Which is he?

sacrilege!

This forest is sacred.
You do not have a right to be here.

Makes no difference.
Where is Panorámix?

You defied that's prohibited.
Shame on you.

Tell us where is Panorámix
or we leave you hanging.

Until you fall down
as an acorn.

the Romans took him.
They have betrayed us.

Astérix looks, I think ldeafix has something.

Give it to me, dog.

Its a piece of Panorámix tunic.
Go look for, looks for it, dog.

- Walk.
- Ideafix will find the trail.

For Tutatis, let us down.

or I will curse you until
the tenth generation.

Its not our druid.
Don't talk nonsense.

Good, Good, Ill do it.
Well, here we go.

You should say thank you.

The Romans, the Romans.
Roman everywhere.

Romans, thousands of Roman.
The Romans, the Romans!

There are still a pot
full of magic potion.

But later, what do we make?
I warn you, I warn you.

The army of the Caesar.
We are served.

Where do think you are going?
To liberate Panorámix.

Let me think.

Hey, you.

Come here.

Return it. Return it.

Give me the sandwich. Give me the sandwich.
Give it to me!

You that have a superior intelligence.

Do you know why you are here.

You want the formula
for the magic potion.

To make what?

I can read it in your face
the ambition and the wickedness.

You want to dethrone Caesar
and to reign in Rome.

Iam an open book for you.

Then you should understand that
you should give me that formula.

I rather die.

Rather die here? Never! You will not
take your secret to the grave

No, druid, you won't die.

But, on the other hand,
if you don't give me

The formula of your magic potion,
you will regret to have been born.

This machine was built

For inflictingunbearable sufferings.

Its my idea.

Good, I will let you to try it.
I will return in some minutes.

Think again before
giving me an answer.

You Wait, wait, wait.
Take.

Ok already. Here we go.

Repeat for last time.
Who are you?

Iam Obelus, legionary of
the 2nd Cohort, third Manípulo.

And me?
Astérix, my best friend.

Do you make it on purpose?
Im sorry. No, no.

You are Astérix,
The infamous Gaul spy.

Is that everything?
No, no.

I made you prisoner when you entered in the camp...

To liberate to the druid.

And to whom do you want to surrender?

I don't know.
I usually gives menhirs, not friends.

- To Caesar, stupid... Well, Now agree.
- To stupid Caesar.

Is he Julio Cesar's relative?
What?

Stupid Cesar, is he Julio Cesar's relative?

What stupid Caesar?
You give me to Julio Caesar.

You are stupid.
I think they called me Obelus.

You drive me crazy!
We start from scratch.

- You are Obelus, do you agree?
- Agree.

Give me to Julio Caesar,
do you agree?

Agree.

And when Obelus says,
for Tutatis you are Obélix.

You become Obélix;
and not before.

When Obelus says, for Tutatis you are Obélix,
I become.

to Obélix and not before.
It is clear. I have understood it.

Finally.

Abduct Caesar and we change it for Panorámix.
That simple.

Hey where are you going?

I should mistreat you so that
you look like an authentic prisoner.

- Say, doesn't Falbalá love me?
- What? To what does this come?

Anything.

you are a Gaul spy, and you are mine.

Do You Believe That she loves me?
A great deal, a great deal; You love you very much.

Falbala adores you, adores you.
You are the man of her life.

Man of her life? How well.

What do you want, legionary?
To see the Caesar and to give him this.

To give that to the Caesar? Funny.
Go somewhere else.

To me the guard! To me the guard! To me the guard!

Take me before Caesar.
I should give him this.

What is it?

A Gaul spy.
He tried to enter in the camp.

He claims to be the so-called druid's assistant.

Are you Panoramix's assistant, the druid?

Yes.

That he has important secrets
to reveal to the Caesar.

Yes, yes.

Old druida, you will not last
then you will speak.

Do what you want.
Do your worse...

Move from here.

Ah, yes?

Over there.

Hello. You are the assistant to Panorámix?

Yes.

- Brave legionary. Your name?
- Obelus. Legionary Obelus.

Very well Obelus,
I will triplicate your salary.

I have a hole here.

Well, take him to the kitchen
and serve him what he requests.

Obelus... By Tutatis!

Obelus, Obelus... By Tutatis!

Druid, druid,
do you know this man?

Never saw him.

Useless to lie, Panorámix.
He knows that I am your assistant.

I help you to prepare the magic potion.

To the machine.
Put him in the machine.

And now?

Obelus, by Tutatis, become Obélix.

Obelus, by Tutatis...
You harm me.

The boar chops are small.

Those are lamb.Boar is for savages.
Do you want some chickens?

- Yes... About 20. I on a diet.
- How many?

Somebody screams, no?
Its only the beginning.

Come here, ldeafix, comes.
Your chop. Come.

Not the feet, Not the feet!

You are hurting me.

We are to the limit.
If you insist you can die, I prevent that.

A Gaul can die,
but never surrender.

Do you agree?
Yes. In principle definitely.

But in practice it is necessary to
be a little more flexible.

You have wanted it.

Yes, my dog. Yes, my bug.

see to look for the fat.
See to look for the fat.

Put the dog in place of the Gaul.

- No, you cannot do that!
- You Will not dare?

Iam mad.

Stop! You have won.
I will manufacture you the magic potion.

They will raze the town, Panorámix.

Insurance. This disgusting one
just wants the magic potion...

To eliminate Caesar and replace him.

You understand everything, druid.

I don't care of your town.
It is Rome what I want!

Me, Detritus,
I want to reign in Rome!

Ideafix.

A white dog with black stains?

No.
No!

ldeafix!

You want to reign.
Ah, no!

Olibrius!

Arrest the traitor
Detritus immediately.

Bring him in 5 minutes.
No, I don't want see him again.

Put him in a prison
before tossing it to the lions.

No one supports traitors in our family.

Bruto can tell it to you.
Hey, Bruto?

Certainly. You are right, dad.

Leave step.

Detritus, by the order of the Caesar
you are arrested.

What? To me, my guard.

Take it.
but, but, what?

but... My guard! But...

ldeafix!

How Lucky.
Where is my prisoner?

Not at this moment.
Its known already. Its over.

Iam not talking to you, understood?
Hey, where is my prisoner?

Do you not see that myself
am I a prisoner?

Arrest this man.
he's an accomplice.

Ah, yes?

Soldier, you are the man that I need.

You are now my personal guard.

But where is my prisoner?

If you help me to capture Caesar.
I will name you my great centurion.

- To capture Caesar?
- Yes.

Thats a good idea.

Guards!

Caesar...

On behalf of the Roman town, you are arrested.

To prison, and watch over him night and day.

Tiquetdebús, join the army.
I will make a declaration.

Soldiers, our boss,
the very dear Julio Caesar.

Have just gotten gravely sick.

He have asked me to take over,
while we hope that he recover.

- Until he is well and takes back the control.
- Well!

Views the circumstances,
I'll double your salary.

Well!

And I also announce you the appointment...

Of the legionary Obelus,
to centurion level.

He will be in charge of my personal security.

In short, to attract the benevolence of the gods.

So that they try to hurry
the cure of Caesar.

There will be some games
organized this same afternoon.

And all are invited.

Can i see my prisoner?

You will see it during the games, agree?

Very well. Yes!

Nobody can pass through here.
Nobody must happen.

You stay here.
Me here.

Nothing will happen.

do have what you need?

No.

What do you want now?
My assistant.

Imagined that. Here he is.

I have taken some cautions.
You understand me, druid.

Your assistant cannot drink
the magic potion before me.

Already?

Only have to pronounce
the magic formula.

Go, what are you waiting for?

My assistant should repeat it after me.

Well. Remove him the gag.

My assistant is a bit far.

What does he says?

For Tutatis, Astérix,
you should drink the potion.

For Tutatis, if we failed we will drink broth.

Yes, you should do it now!

No!
Burn horrors!

Brave, Panorámix.

You have played and you have lost.

My vengeance will be terrible.

Good, let us prove this potion.

If unfortunately it is
a vulgar soup of vegetables,

It you who will be digusted.
I warn you.

A very touching moment.

It worked!

In prison.
There won't be a lot of time, believe me.

But,what does Obélix do?

When I am an Emperor.
I will make you into a general.

And Caesar?

Caesar? Who is that?

Falbalá!

- Gaul, do you like animals?
- Yes. Why?

You will be well served.

Centurions! Legionaries!

The bets will close to
the entrance of each prisoner.

- Do your bet.
- Bets? What do you bet?

A prisoner leaves for the door at the bottom,
then vs what he gives?

It must cross the water pool and get to this sand.

If he arrives until here,
I spare his life.

Do you follow me?
Yes.

I bet the animal will eat him.
It is my idea.

And if here gets here?
That, that never happens.

But if you bet your pay of centurion,
thousand against one.

Accept the bet.
Agree.

Your pay? Thousand against one?

oh! You are cold blood.
I like it. Shake!

Accept the bet.

And my prisoner?
You said that i would see him in the games.

In fact, there he is.

Legionaries, the first prisoner is the Gaul Astérix.

Obelus! Obelus!

Become Obélix!

Obelus!

Obelus! What is this?

I don't like this.
Need to get out.

Brave! Well done!

But, why are they here?
Ah, no, no, no.

I prefer to leave.

Do you worry about your bet, hey?

Behind, behind.

That gaul is clever, hey?
A little yes.

Obélix change!
Obélix! Doesnt he understands anything.

Obélix!

Go sleep in your cage,
go to the cage.

Now big lizards, no!

Go sleep.

For Tutatis!

Oh, no!

Obelus, by Tutatis, change...

Never saw anybody survive to that point.

You have lost, Obelus.
A thousand times your pay, do you remember?

What that Gaul
did is extraordinary.

Obelus! Obelus!
For... Silence!

Obelus, by Tuta...!
Oh, but... For Your...! Oh!

Eat thid, you enormous beast.

Obelus! Obelus!
Obelus, by Tuta...!

You said that if he arrived here
you spare his life.

Yes, that Caesar; but I am entitled to a joker.

- And is your joker an animal?
- Worst, It is a man!

Obelus... by Tutatis!

Listen,isn't it curious.
It seems that he is speaking to you.

What does he say? Cannot hear anything.
I will read the lips, hey.

Do you know how to make it?
Yes, I have the skill of a spy.

Said exactly:

Obelus, by Tutatis, become Obélix.
It is urgent.

Are you sure?... Ah, good!
I tell you that yes.

You separate your hands.

What kept you?
I made request for your help one hour ago.

With the noise i didn't hear anything.
It is necessary to free Panorámix.

Where is he?
Below.

Go to them.

For Tutatis, you have been in charge.
Yes.

You alone.
Guards, go go.

Brave, Obélix!

Go, we go, we go.
Quickly, come we go.

No, no; I don't like the spiders.
Im not gonna cross.

I have an idea.

I will blow them.

Obélix, Panorámix!

Wait, Obélix, I'll teach you.

Come here!
Lets go!

Watchout for the cats.

Horn, Roman. Here.

Which way? Somewhere around, yes, yes.
We are here, Panorámix.

Ideafix, my dog!

My bug!

Obélix.

The enemies of our enemies are our friends.

Lets take advantage.
Lets leave. Off we go.

Come,come.

Alert, alerts.
The Romans att*ck.

Punch them well or they will come more.

Go we go, we already arrive.
We go.

Obélix? But if it is Obélix!

Undoubtedly its me.
Don't you recognize me?

Why the hell you disguised as a Roman?

Enough already.

who is that?

A prisoner of the Romans that we liberated.

Yes.
Esautomátix removes his mask.

Not this way, be careful.

What are you waiting for?

Go, remove his mask, by Tutatis.
It is an order.

As u like.

Its Julio, Julio, Julio Caesar!

We have captured Julio Caesar.
I have captured Julio Caesar.

How?... Ah!
We have captured Julio Caesar.

The situation is more serious
give what you think.

Obélix, Astérix, Abraracúrcix, and you,
Julio Caesar, I wanna speak to you.

Before that i want to change myself,
I am tired of being a Roman.

The troops of Detritus,
they will att*ck us any moment now.

And they are more a thousand times
larger that us.

Only a thousand times?
We have the magic potion.

We only have left little in the pot.

- Now they also have it.
- What?

Detritus forced me
to prepare them magic potion.

But he only have a small pot.

With their numeric superiority,
if they used the potion.

Would be enough to decant
the scale to their favor.

And then, our town.

Would be erased from the map forever.

And will be Caesar m*rder*d by Detritus.
What do you say, Caesar?

What you say is correct, druid.

But, I have a proposition to make to you.

If you help me to recover my power,

You will be exempt from giving taxes.

And you will be able to continue
living outside of the Roman law.

What do you say, boss?
Its very interesting.

But maybe better if Petibónum
becomes foreign trade zone.

with the possibility give
not to supervise our companies.

Believe that you exaggerate, Gaul.

This is the time to make business?

Does some possibility give to conquer?
Yes. A minimal possibility.

Ah! Which? Talk druida.

I can make my potion
more potent

If I can add unicorn's milk of 2 heads.

Of 2 heads?
That animal was long gone before i was born.

Mathusalix still has a little flask.

Mathusálix? And where is he?
We have not seen to the crazy old one for years.

True.

How can you call my great-grandfather crazy
if he's one that taught me everything?

The Romans att*ck, boss.
Boss, the Romans att*ck.

From where? from where?

From the behind door.

Its a trick.
In fact they will att*ck from front.

How do you know that?
I invented that strategy.

att*cks!

It is necessary to find Mathusalix.
Follow me.

Come!
Yes, I go.

Mathusálix, where are you?
We need you.

Deaf already.
How old will he be?

About 200. He like to hide, he loves it.

Continue being a joker.

Mathusálix!

what is this?

Its the end of his beard.
Lets follow it.

Did you discover it alone?
Yes.

Lets go.

Give me, give me, give me.
With softness, gently.

With softness, Obélix.
Yes, gently, yes.

Caught ya.

Is it him?

Mathusálix, it excuses for the nuisance
but this is a serious matter.

I need milk of unicorn with 2 heads.

The survival of the town depends on it.

I have waited this moment
for a lot of time.

I will not give it to you
so easily.

What?

I will give it to you
if you can answer my 2 questions.

Are u joking?
The Romans are attacking us!

Don't treats him with rudeness.
He is stubborn as a mule.

And I notice it of you too:
You cannot make a mistake.

Good. First question.

A beggar had a brother,
this brother is dead.

But while he was alive the beggar
didn't have any brother. Why?

Why?

Seven! Six!
Attention is only 5 drops left water.

Five! Four! Three!

If you don't find the answer
you can go and ask her to the Romans.

Two!
The beggar is a woman.

Valid answer.

All to the barricades!

Drink, drink the potion.
I will look for more.

att*cks!
Boss, boss.

What it happens?

We are in disadvantage with the Gauls.
Give us magic potion.

lmposible! It is reserved for my personal use.

The troops are tired.

The Gauls also and soon
they ran out of potion.

Go, I saw you enough.

And now, the second enigma.

I do not have a brother neither sister,
but that man's son.

He is my father's son.
Who is ?

Twenty drops! Twenty drops!

Slowly.
I should keep for Astérix.

But, what the hell do they do?
What the hell do they do?

I Am going to charge myself!
I am going to charge myself!

Foward!
Foward!

Five!

Believe, I believe that I already know it.

Four!

Say it once and for all.
I am not sure.

Its the same, right now.

And u have another correct answer?
Doesn't matter, I tell you. Say it!

One!
Its, he is my father.

- I already forgot the question.
- Do you make fun of us?

No, but at my age I have error of memory.
Its normal, right?

Clear.
I strangle to this unfortunate one.

Ask, I do not have brother
neither sister but the son of.

That man is my father's son.
Who is ?

The answer is:
My father.

Valid answer.

Reason?
Explaination.

If he says it.

As it was the first thing that happened to me.

Because it is the correct answer.
but I said it without stopping to think.

The first thing that I thought.
Shut up once and for all.

We need the vial!
Oh, great druid!

The vial!

The vial!

Brave, ldeafix!
Well done, my dog.

Brave, dog, brave!
My dog! My dog!

Stop, unfortunate.
For Tutatis.

There are still left!

- Already. Drink, quick.
- Obélix also?

Yes, yes. This milk changes
the nature of the magic potion.

The effect may vary.
You will already see.

Very good, very good.
Their aftertaste is very pleasant.

Truth what am I able to do?
I already told it to you. Quickly.

What will i notice?
Wait a bit, and you will see.

Pequeñines, come, come.

Foward!

att*cks. Let us go!

att*cks!

Return to battle!

Other more.

There go.

Cowardly panda! Cochineals! Miserable!

At one o'clock. At two o'clock.

Now you will see, silly poor persons.
Ja! Must i do everything.

Coarse.

- You Did It very well.
- The same to you

Caesar!

Ave, Caesar.
Ave Caesar!

Legionaries.

The Gauls from this village
they are from now on is our friends.

And our allies.

They pulled me from the treacherous
claws of Detritus's.

Without them, i would be dead.

Your time has come, Detritus.
Pity, noble Caesar, pity.

I don't knows what it happened me.
I wasn't myself.

I lost my head.
you do not know it well.

A moment, a moment,
a moment, please.

Don't do it, Caesar. Good,
I have played, and I have lost.

Now punish me,
nothing more to be spoken.

You are worthless.
Thank you.

Exactly, do you reflect, hey?

Always! Always!
There has to be somebody worthless.

Near the power, no?

That's not true at all.
Silence, Gauls.

- Shut Up you.
- That avoids getting dirty hands.

I know how to make of everything, Caesar.
Of everything.

Spying, denouncing, betraying my friends.

All are it that more I like it.
And the false testimonies, also.

Everything!
You disgust me.

You know me very well.
I disgust him, you already heard it.

Then Caesar,
I won't disappoint you.

Danger, Caesar...

Danger from those traitors that are around to you.

And that you believe to be faithful and devote.

Who do you speak?
I talk of...

Can't tell it to you in public.

Its unpleasant, Caesar.

Caesar.

If you are interested, I'll prepare you
a list and then can we comment on it.

Take it.
Thanks.

Come, I will make you a list
that you will be surprised.

Many awaits the moment
to give you a s*ab.

In the back.
They are friends, neighbors, even relatives.

Do you understand?
Relatives. Come, Caesar!

Falbalá.

You are the tenth Obélix
that I kiss tonight.

Yes, but I am the true Obélix.
True!

The other ones were not more
than imitations.

Falbalá, I have to speak to you.
I have to tell you something.

sh**t, I listening.

- Will you marry me?
- Hey? Do you speak seriously?

Yes. Why?

Obélix, I love you a lot,
as to a great brother.

Like to a friend,
My great teddy Obélix.

But I love Tragicómix.
We'll marry next month.

Ah, yes? But if me...
Prólix told me that you...

Prólix is only a cheater.

Don't be sad. I can't see you sad, Obélix.

Falbalá.

I should leave. Are you mad?
You will always be my friend?

My great teddy Obélix.
Do you promise it to me?

Do promise it to me?

That you promise it to me.
Yes.

Panorámix, can you give me more
magic potion, please?

Are you joking?
There more than enough Obélix outside?

Its not for me.

Falbalá, I can speak with you 2 seconds more?

What do you want from her?
No worries.

I'll return it to you at once.
We go, they come with me. They come.

Falbalá, drink this.
What is it?

It will not harm you.
I also drank.

Come on drinks, please.
Give me that pleasure.

Is it ok?

Not bad.

But...
What?

Good, now you can go
to look for your Tragicómix.

Do you want to stay with me?

Believe that I have more than enough.
I leave you.

Falbalá.

To your health, Romans.
To your health, Asterix.

Have you seen?

Solo, Already tired of looking repeated.

Me also.

Imagine all the boars
to feed them to all.

Obélix, Obélix, Obélix!

Obélix has disappeared.

will say the double he/she gives Obélix.

No, no, all. I looked for him
everywhere and nowhere to be found.

You Have k*lled my friend.
Calm down.

The true Obélix will be somewhere as you are here.

- A the best thing also disappears.
- No.

How do you know it?
Had you already used the milk unicorn?

Me no, but Mathusálix always used it.

And if there has been danger,
he would have warned me.

Warned!
That yokel is a perverse one.

I will not allows you to speak
like that of my great-grandfather.

- He has taught me everything...
- Whats wrong with you?

I feel strange.
I sit down as if, i was empty.

I will also become in soap bubbles.

Right now, I have itches in the
legs and in the ankles.

If the one that tickles me is ideafix.

But what do you want, my dog?
What going on? Where do you take me?

In my place to himself would you take
the opportunity of the situation.

You no?
No, me no. No.

Not that i dont want...
I just want you to kiss me without desire.

In the mouth?

Falbalá!

Obélix, Obélix.
Falbalá.

Are you the true one.
Falbala.

Of Course it's me, why?

Because the other ones, Obélix.
They all have disappeared.

And the other ones, Asterix, also.
Yes, like Falbala.

Yes, as Falbalá.
That is to have bad luck.

On everything for...
Yes, for Falbalá.

Go. They say that the wrong
gives loves it doesn't last a lifetime.

With the time leave good memories.
And you have me.

Yes, less than bad I have you.
Less bad.

Less bad.

Already go. Wait for me!

My Caius Bonus.
No, no, no, finished.

Its the last time,
only a last time.

Greet the Egyptian!
you have gone away to Caius Bonus.

Everyone has left without
fighting for the last time.

Obélix comes, don't put that face.
It is the victory, we have won.

Yes, but I have lost everything.

My friends!

This afternoon we celebrate two important events.

Our victory on the Romans.

Well! Well done!

And Obelix's anniversary.
Good! You fell down within the magical potion.

When you are a baby.

Obélix!

In the friendship, the banquets,
the Romans, the cakes.

Obélix!

Famous you are for making menhirs.

Obélix!

Will never become bigger
if the love blushes.

And now, the cake.

They are yours.
Caesar has participated.

Come, Obélix.

You. Yes, you, you, you.

You, you, you, you, you.

Here.
No.

Right here.
No.

Yes!

Always the hard hitter.
You destroy the cake in one go.

I always tell it to him.
Hes is a glutton.

Obélix, Obélix.

Obélix, Obélix.

I want to sing.
I want to sing.