01x16 - For Bros About to Rock

[bunniefuu]

- ♪ Crashing through
the crowded halls ♪

♪ Dodging girls
like Ping-Pong balls ♪

♪ Just to reach the bathroom
on time ♪

♪ Leaping over laundry piles

♪ Diapers you can smell
for miles ♪

♪ Guy's got to do
what he can to survive ♪

- ♪ In the Loud house

♪ In the Loud house

- ♪ Duck, dodge, push,
and shove ♪

♪ Is how we show our love

- ♪ In the Loud house,
in the Loud house ♪

- ♪ One boy and ten girls

♪ Wouldn't trade it
for the world ♪

- ♪ Loud Loud Loud

♪ Loud house

- Poo-poo.

[rock music]

♪ ♪

- ♪ Yeah!

♪ Take my advice
and don't be a mooch ♪

♪ Grab life by the lips
and give it a smooch ♪

♪ Whoo ♪

♪ Give it a smooch

- Clyde,
Smooch is the coolest band ever.

- Copy that.

I'd totally give life a smooch

if I wasn't
saving my lips for Lori.

- Clyde and I are going to see
Smooch tonight,

and not to make
a big deal of it,

but it's our first concert.

Okay, Clyde, meet you at the
ticket line in T-minus one hour.

- Okay, that'll give me time
to work on my dance moves.

[grunts]
Oh!

- Aah!

- Simmer down and listen up.

- We overheard your conversation
and we're here to warn you.

- Do not let Luna know

that you're going
to your first concert.

She'll insist on going with you.

- What?
Why?

- I don't know,
'cause she's nuts?

But she's done it
to all of us.

- Yeah, and when she goes,

she gets way too excited
and literally ruins everything.

There was my first
Boyz Will Be Boyz concert.

- ♪ Ooh, girl, if I could

♪ Ooh, girl, give you the

- [sobbing]

I love you!

- Come on, people.

Where's your energy?

[electricity crackles]

- ♪ Ooh, girl

- And our first
Blarney the Dinosaur concert.

- ♪ Moo goes the cow

♪ Oink goes the pig

♪ Watch me do me Irish jig

- Come on, guys.
Crowd surf!

- And my first opera.

- [singing in foreign language]

- Check it, Lis!

Stage dive!

- [screams]
[horns squeal]

- Oh, man.

I can't let Luna
find out about Smooch.

- Don't worry.

We can get you out
without her knowing.

- Guys, I am not getting
in one of Lucy's coffins again.

- That won't be necessary.

Please keep your arms and legs
inside at all times.

- Aah!

It's all taken care of.

Luna will never know
about the concert.

- Yo, bro.

I saved you a spot in line!

- Luna, how did you know
about the concert?

- You kidding me?

When it comes to music,
I know all.

Are you ready for me to show you

how to have the greatest
first concert ever?

- Well, I uh...

- Awesome!

First up, something has to be
done about your duds.

Your threads, man.

Wow, your clothes, dude.

- I think we're fine.

[rock guitar riff]

- So much better.

- There's no zipper.
What if I need to pee?

- You'll be having too much fun
to pee.

Now let's see your rock pose.

Uh, what's that?

- My rock pose.
I'm igneous.

- No, dudes.

I mean throw up the goats...
like this.

Yeah!

You try.

both: Yeah, uh...

- We'll work on it later.

Now let's see your dance moves.

- I can't dance.

- What?
Everybody can dance, man.

You just have to feel the music
and move yo booty!

- Whoa!
Ugh!

[gasps]

[shivers and grunts]

- Raspberry or yellow?

- That's it, Lincoln.

Come on, everybody!

Pre-show sing-along.

Sing it with me!

♪ Take my advice
and don't be a mooch ♪

♪ Grab life by the lips
and give it a smooch ♪

Speaking of smooch,
just your type.

Get over here, bro.

There's nothing like falling
in love at your first concert.

all: Oooh!

[dramatic choral music]

- That's it.
We're done here.

- Dude,

I'm just trying to make your
first concert unforgettable.

- All you're doing
is embarrassing me.

Our sisters warned me about you.

- What are you talking about?

- They said you ruined
all their first concerts

just like you're
ruining mine now.

- Ouch.
Message received.

If that's the way you feel,
good night, Royal Woods Mall.

Luna Loud has left the building.

- Did I go too far?
Clyde?

Clyde, what are you doing?

- My rock pose.
I don't like confrontations.

- Clyde, line's moving.

- Hey, no cuts, kid.

- Back of the line, line-cutter.

- But that was our spot.

Come on.

[clock ticking]

We made it!

- Sorry, boys.

Smooch is officially sold out.

both: No!

- I can't believe we didn't
get Smooch tickets.

- Psst, hey, kid.

Did I hear you say
you needed Smooch tickets?

- Yes!
Two, please.

We're in!
- Yes!

[police siren blares]

- You're in, all right.

Incarcerated.

- Are those good seats?

- Buying scalped tickets
is illegal.

Let's go, hooligans.

- Well, might as well
practice my dancing.

- Oh, give it up, kid.

My hip can pop and lock
better than you.

- Pipe down, Scoots,

or I'll add disorderly conduct
to your speeding charge.

- I still can't dance, Lincoln.

- What does it matter?

We're not going
to the concert anyway.

- Yo, little Loud.

What are you doing here?

- Bobby?
What are you doing here?

- This is my new job.

Lori loves a man in uniform,

plus I'm learning a ton
about police work.

Here are those chicken samples
you wanted

from the food court, Captain.

- Great work, Santiago.

Now go do a stakeout
at Wok of Art.

I think they're giving out
egg rolls.

- Right away, boss.

- [chewing and gulping]

[clock ticking]

Boys, your mom's here.

both: What?

- Oh, my babies!

- Luna?
I mean, Mom?

- You're lucky I answered the
phone when the fuzz called, bro.

Officer, I'll take it from here.

- Yes, ma'am.
Right away, ma'am.

- Your steaks, Captain.

- What the heck
are you talking about?

Where are my egg rolls, son?

- You said to do a "steak" out,
so--hey, Luna.

- You know their mother?

- That's not their mother.
That's his sister.

Nice wig, by the way.

- Wig?
- [giggles]

- Oh, snap.

[cell door closes]

- Sorry, bro.

I fought the law
and the law won.

- I can't believe
you came back for us.

- I've been thinking
about what you said,

and you and the girls are right.

I do get a little crazy
when it comes to first concerts.

- Why are they
so important to you?

- 'Cause my first rock show
changed my life.

It was Mick Swagger,
summer of th grade.

The Gimme Swelter Tour.

Up until that muggy June night,

I didn't know
who I wanted to be,

but the moment Mick
and the boys took the stage,

it all started to become clear.

- ♪ It was a hot June night

♪ When she saw the light

♪ Up until then
she didn't know what was right ♪

♪ She showed up at the show

♪ All confused and alone

♪ She had no idea
what was about to unfold ♪

♪ Transformation

- It was like
he was talking to me.

- ♪ A citizen
of the rock and roll nation ♪

♪ Transformation

♪ Total mutation

- It was in that moment
I realized

I was Luna Loud!

Stage dive!

[crowd cheers]

♪ ♪

- Wow, I had no idea.

- I know it's only
rock and roll,

but I like it.

- [weeping]

I'm sorry, that was just
such a beautiful story.

You're right, kid.

First concerts
are unforgettable.

And I can't let you miss yours.

Here, here's your tickets back.

Now get out of here.

- Mall Cop Captain, couldn't
you see it in your heart

to let me spend my first concert
with my sister?

A third ticket would mean a lot.

- Well, I just happen
to have this other ticket

here in my pocket,

and since you did
succeed earlier

in pulling at my heartstrings,

I would love for you to attend
the show with your brother.

all: Rock and roll!

- You didn't have to do that,
little brother.

- I know, but it wouldn't be a
first concert without Luna Loud.

I'm sorry I said those things
in the ticket line.

- It's cool, little bro.

And don't worry, I promise to be
on my best behave.

- Okay, okay, enough.

Now get out of here,
you crazy kids.

[cheering]

Ah, for those about to rock--

- Adios, mall cop!

- Bobby, we got a runner--
I mean a roller.

Cut her off at the food court.

- YOLO!

- Ah, come on.

Bobby, you can't just
let a perp--

ooh, is that popcorn shrimp?

♪ ♪

- I can't see a thing.

Ugh, I thought my first concert
was gonna be unforgettable.

- It could be,
but I don't want to interfere.

- No, please, interfere.

- Okay, first up,
we got to get to the front.

- Whoa, I can't cut
in front of all these people.

- That's why they invented
crowd surfing.

both: What?

- Whoo!
This is awesome!

- Careful, guys.
Cradle the neck.

- Enjoy the ride, dudes?

- Whoa, how did you
get up here so fast?

- I have my ways.
Now come on.

Pose it like you chose it.

- ♪ Smoochy smoochy

♪ Whoo

♪ Whoa whoa

♪ Wet and sloppy

- Boy, did my sisters
have it wrong about Luna.

She's not nuts at all.

She's just really passionate
about the things she loves.

And in the words
of my favorite band,

sometimes you got to...

both: ♪ Grab life by the lips

♪ And give it a smooch

- That's my bro!

- Thanks for making my first
concert unforgettable, Luna!

both: Rock and roll!

- Hold on, hold on, hold on.

This one ended
real great and all,

but I still can't dance,
Lincoln.

- Hold tight, Clyde.

- ♪ Da da smoochity smooch

♪

- [shivers and grunts]

I'm doing it!
I'm doing it!

- ♪ Give it a smooch

[upbeat rock music]