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Dead Billy (2016)

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Dead Billy (2016)

Post by bunniefuu »

- I wanna show you something.

- Unstable, and on the verge

of a complete meltdown.

That's the word from German

environment Minister Matilda...

- Holy sh*t, that smells good!

Oh, what happened?

You okay?

- I think it's all right, I

could use a band aid though.

- It looked good, at least.

- I guess we'll just have

to make this salad night.

- You sure, it's not Thursday,

think you can handle it?

- I can improvise.

- Oh chaos, everything

is chaos, I say.

Destruction and flames,

and new torments,

and new tormented

souls I see around me,

wherever I look and

how so ever I turn,

and wherever I gaze.

- Shh.

- What's this?

- Earthquake in Poland,

I guess this nuclear

plant's about to blow.

- sh*t, now I feel like an a*s.

- As you should.

How was it?

- Huh?

- The lecture, how was it?

- Peruse.

- Very nice, your turn.

- Hmm, it was what it

was, I didn't learn much.

- You don't need

to learn anything,

you know it all all ready.

- Ouch.

- No, oh, sh*t, that's

not what I mean.

- Uh huh.

- No, really.

- Yup.

- I just mean you're smart.

- Sure.

- That's not what I...

- But that's not what...

- Stop, you know what I meant.

- Tell me again how smart I am.

- While don't you

shut up and grab me

a boiled egg from the

fridge, smart guy.

Do you want an avocado?

- Hey, will you turn

that off for a second.

- What's wrong?

- Nothing, nothing is

wrong, at least I hope not.

All my life, I've looked

at words as though

seeing them for the first time.

I rehearsed this

in my head all day.

Oh, damn it, I had this

all figured out in the car.

Uh, here.

Doubt thou the stars of fire,

doubt that the sun does move,

doubt truth to be a liar,

but never doubt my love.

Calliope Garrard,

will you marry me?

I know it's not much, I wanted

to get something bigger.

- Cali, look at me.

- I'm here.

- Oh, you're awake,

how are we feeling?

- She needs water.

- Looks like we have

had quite a night,

haven't we Calliope?

You wanna tell me

what you remember?

- I just came home.

- Mmm hmm.

- And I cut my finger.

- And?

- Doubt the stars of fire,

did you propose to me?

- So, was it a

stroke or something?

- Well, Calliope experienced

what we call a tonic clonic

event, or what was referred

to as a grand Mal seizure

back in the middle ages.

It can be triggered

by a number of things,

stress, malnutrition,

flashing lights,

were you watching television

when this happened?

- Uh, yeah.

- Yeah, okay, tell me,

can you remember having

any strange feelings

the moments preceding?

Dizziness maybe, or a

strong surge of emotions,

altered vision,

hearing, strange smells,

overwhelming sense of deja

vu, anything like that?

- I don't remember.

- Okay, well the seizure

appears to have been idiopathic.

- What does that mean?

- It's a fancy word

for we don't know.

Now, is this the first

time it's happened to you?

- I don't...

I think, when I lived with

Billy, or maybe before.

- Billy?

- And how long ago was that?

- I don't know, maybe

10 years ago, nine.

- Who's Billy?

- Was it just the one time?

- I was eighteen.

I don't, I don't...

- Okay, well listen,

I want you to relax,

I'm gonna come back in and

check on you in a little bit.

We're gonna keep you overnight

and run some tests, okay?

- Sure, okay.

- Who's Billy?

- Hey, you wanna know

why they call me dead Billy?

It was '67, '68 maybe,

before the Ted offensive.

They sent us into this

village, north of.

Everyone there was

Cong, they said.

There was this black guy,

called him big Charles,

huge m*therf*cker, but

a sweetheart, you know.

Big Charles sees this

girl, maybe seven or eight,

sitting in a road, out

in front of the huts.

She's crying, he has a candy

bar or something in his pack,

so he goes to her, to

give her the candy,

and she jumps up, throws

something, grenade maybe,

something, and Big Charles

catches it one handed,

and turns his big

dumb eyes to me,

and next thing I

know I'm on my back,

wearing his guts as

a f*cking necklace.

I was standing five,

10 feet away maybe,

and I didn't have

a scratch on me.

So everyone says later,

Jesus Christ Billy,

you should have been

f*cking dead, right?

And I should have been,

I mean, I know that,

but I didn't even singe

my God damn eyebrows.

So about a month later, we're

in this little bar in Saigon,

and this guy Norman,

big Navajo guy,

he's trying to get me

laid, all those guys,

they thought I was a virgin.

Norm decides he can't

have that in his unit,

so he's talking to

this slope wh*re,

but she don't speak English,

it's all just GI, GI,

blowie, blowie, f*ck,

f*ck, that sort of thing,

so he's telling her this story

about how I should be dead,

and she lights all up

like a Christmas tree,

because yeah, she

knows that word, dead.

So, she just looks at

me with these big eyes,

and she just shrugs

and says, "Blowie?"

He gives her five bucks, he

takes to me this little room

in the back, and sucks me off.

Took me thirty seconds,

but I swear I damn near

blew a hole in the

back of her skull.

Anyway, I've been

Dead Billy ever since.

- Cali, come on, this isn't

funny, just open the door,

I know you're in there.

Cali, I just wanna see

you, open the door!

Come on, I'm gonna stay

here all day, until...

Oh God, what did you

let him do to you.

- I told you I ran away

from home for a while,

when I was a kid.

- Yeah, but you never

mentioned this Billy.

Who was he?

- Just this guy, a vet.

- From the Gulf?

- Vietnam.

- Jesus, how old was he?

And you lived with him?

Was it, was it a sexual thing?

- Roy...

- Come on, were you

f*cking the guy?

- What do you think?

I don't think I need

to apologize to you.

- Are you okay?

- Developing in

Germany, showing a frightening

new discovery at the

Kumps Nuclear Plant,

just days after the

earthquake in Poland

sent the reactor into

complete meltdown.

German officials have now

released data that shows

radiation levels around

Kunps have spiked

to levels much higher than

initial reports suggested.

Reports from both the German

environmental authorities,

and the UN health

organization, show that total

air release of iodine

131 and Cecil 137...

- Hey, look at me.

- Well, this is kinda f*cked up.

- There's nothing to

discourage the appetite

for divinity in

the heart of man.

That's Kabu, my dear.

- Lucian.

- Hmm?

Muse, I thought you were

staying with your mother.

- It's Tuesday, Daddy.

- Well then...

Well sit Muse, join us.

Would you like some coffee?

- I don't know, I

should get to school.

- Nonsense, sit.

Cali, this is Ashley,

she's my graduate student.

- Hey, sure.

I gotta get to class.

- Sit!

- Okay.

- Ashley, this is my

daughter Cali, my muse.

Ashley is quite the star in

our humble little bailiwick.

She's doing her thesis

on the age of reason,

very provocative stuff.

- I'm doing this third

way feminist view of it.

You know, breaking

down the relationship

between the mostly

male existentialist...

- I'm sorry but

this is bullshit.

- Cali.

- Not your thesis,

sorry, it sounds very,

you know, interesting,

or whatever, I gotta go.

- Cali, I'm afraid

you're being a child.

- Don't feel bad, I

know he's very charming.

- You buy it, or you

stop playing with it.

- You wouldn't like it, it's

all full of words and stuff.

- Made of Athens

air we part, give,

oh, give me back my heart.

It's Byron.

- Good for you,

you're a smart one.

This lad was known as

Nicholas the Galant,

making love in secret

was his talent.

That's Trosser.

So how does a useless

truant like you quote Byron,

what's your deal?

- Like you said,

I'm a smart one.

- Yeah, I can tell.

You know, I ain't your daddy,

but aren't you supposed

to be in school?

- I'll go when they

can teach me something

they haven't learned

in their ignominious

little community

college educations.

- Jesus Christ, how old are you?

- 18.

- Uh huh, what's your name?

- What do you care?

- What's your name?

- Cali, Calliope really, but

only my dad calls me that.

- It's kind of a faggy

name, is your daddy a f*g.

- Hardly.

- Calliope, the muse.

- Yeah, he's the only one

who calls me that too.

- Ah, I get it, issues.

Here.

Take it, it will

make daddy happy.

- I don't have issues.

- We all have issues, sweetie.

- So what are yours?

- What do you think?

- You're like a vet, right?

So you've probably

k*lled people.

- That's none of your business.

- I'm sorry, I thought we

were talking about issues.

- You don't back off, do you?

- Nope.

- I'm Billy, yeah,

I k*lled people.

- How many?

- I like you Cali.

- I don't believe you, I don't

think you k*lled anybody.

- Stop by the next time you

want to escape the ignominy.

See ya.

So what you doing here, Cali?

- Was that you playing,

when I walked up?

- You ain't 18, ain't

no f*cking way you're 18.

Hey Billy, ain't no

f*cking way she 18.

- Mind your business.

Anyway, ever tell you

guys the story about

how I got the name Dead Billy?

- Only everyday Bill, it's

different every God damn time.

- Ah, I'm not very

good, but I like the...

- Need any help girl,

just call, let me know.

- I think maybe, this

isn't a great idea.

I'm old enough to

be your father.

- But you're not...

My father.

- Hey, look at me.

You're sure?

- Yeah.

But I better go.

- So, I told them that the play

was about a rabid populous.

And they looked at me with

these longing, willful,

naive stares that only a

college freshman could have,

hoping that I was not

writing another tirade

about an impotent generation.

And of course I told them I was.

Their heads dropped,

it was cute, in a way.

Your shirt's inside out, yup.

- Where were you?

You are not going to

drink out of that carton.

Still haven't

answered my question.

- I was at dads.

- Uh huh, and how was dad?

- What is that, what the f*ck.

Holy sh*t, uh Jesus

Christ, come in.

sh*t, sorry, sit.

Jesus, how are you Cali?

- I'm good.

- Oh, congratulations,

who's the guy.

- His name is Roy.

- Good name, a grown up name,

if you know what I mean.

What does he do, where did you

meet him, tell me everything?

- Okay, let's see,

he's a post grad,

at the University,

comparative lit.

- Sounds fancy.

- Well, we met at a

lecture, he was...

Geez, this sounds

horrible, but he was my TA.

- So you're still

going to school?

- Got my bachelors last fall,

and I just started

the masters program.

- Comparatives, what's it...

- English education.

- That's great,

really, that's great.

I knew as you soon

as you got your GED,

everything would fall

in place for you.

Seriously, the best congrats.

- Thanks.

- So, what brings you by?

- I was, you're

going to hate this.

- f*ck.

- Selena...

- No Cali.

Calliope, look at me.

This isn't some bullshit

about closure, is it?

- I've been having

seizures again.

- Oh, geez, okay Calliope,

you don't need to be talking

to me, you need to...

- No, I've all ready

been to a doctor,

that's not why I'm here.

Okay, um.

You see it, right?

- Of course I do, what...

- You see that, right?

- Yeah, but...

- What do you see?

Please, Selena, I'm

just trying to explain.

- I see, well, a little

statue of, I don't know,

is it Athena, or something?

- Calliope, the muse.

- Okay, Calliope, and a glass.

- What color is the glass?

- This is...

- Please.

- It's amber, okay,

now you have to

tell me what this is all about.

- Billy gave me that statue,

and that glass is

from his house.

When you got me out of there,

I didn't take anything

with me, did I?

- No, of course not.

- I just found this at my house.

And that, is that a seizure.

I was hoping, I thought maybe

you could tell me where he is.

- Absolutely not.

No way in hell,

Jesus Christ Cali,

you were like my

one success story.

Do you remember what you were

like when you got out of there?

I do, 80 pounds, at most,

somebody would slam a door,

you'd nearly jump

out of your skin.

You remember that, do you?

Look at me.

Calliope, stop!

Why?

- I don't want to talk to

him Selena, or see him.

I just need to know where he is.

- I don't believe you.

I've seen this way too

many times before, no.

I'm sorry, but no.

Cali, wait.

- I wanna show you something.

- Okay, what?

- You feeling it?

40 seconds, maybe less,

that's all you got baby.

You right with God

and everything, hmm?

You're seeing spots, hmm?

Tiny little explosions

like firecrackers,

way in the back of your corneas,

visions narrowing down,

tiny little pinprick.

Want me to countdown for you?

30, 29, 28, 27, 26, enough?

That's what it's like to die.

That guy, Starkey's friend,

that dude you were talking to

at the VFW, what was his name?

His name Calliope, what was it?

- I don't, I don't know.

- I think he liked you.

You can go out with

him, if you want to.

I mean, if you really want to.

- Hello.

- Hey, I was

thinking about stopping by

that new vegan Thai place on

my way home, you want anything?

- Yeah, pad Thai.

- Tofu, egg noodles, right?

- Yeah.

- And a ton of

hot stuff, I got it.

You want a Thai iced tea?

Hey, you okay?

- Um, no, just banged my

elbow on the gear shift.

No iced tea, thanks though.

- Okay, you home?

- I'll be home in

a few, I'm just out

running a couple errands.

- You doing okay?

- Yeah, yeah, just...

Um, sh*t.

- You okay?

- No, the batteries crapping

out, I'll see you in a bit.

- Mmm, okay.

- There's nothing I can

say to stop you, is there?

And you know that this

is really stupid, right?

I don't know where

he is, after...

You know, he just sort

of dropped off our radar.

You'll have to trust me on that.

- Okay.

- You need to know that

this could get me fired.

Alissa Kononen, she's a stand

up comic out of Brooklyn.

After you left, I

did a quick search.

She's on the road right

now, she's doing clubs

all across the country.

I don't have her number, but

if you're up for a drive,

she's performing down in

the Springs, this Saturday.

Maybe you could catch

her after the show.

She's his daughter.

Calliope, this cannot

come back on me, okay?

- Of course.

- Take care of yourself.

- Yeah, okay, I get.

No, I understand, I...

I do Kay, but...

Can't you just put

her on the pho...

All right, well at least

tell her happy birthday.

- Morning.

- Is it epilepsy?

- Epilepsy's a fairly useless

term, but no I don't think so.

Looky here.

Not a tumor, don't worry, it

appears to be a small lesion,

about the size of

your pinky nail.

And it appears to have

been there for some time.

Tell me, Calliope, have

you been seeing things,

or hearing voices, or

anything like that?

You know, there's no

percentage in not being

honest about this, Calliope.

Okay, well first

thing, no more TV.

Not until we get

this taken care of.

- What are the options?

- Well, considering the

seizures and hallucinations,

and whatnot, I'd say

we're pretty well past the

wait and see stage.

Now, I doubt this is

cancer, but we'll need to do

a biopsy to rule it out.

In the meantime, no

TV, try not to drive,

blah, blah, blah,

you know the drill.

Don't worry, this is nothing.

It's a little pit

stop, that's all.

Congratulations, by the way.

- It's okay Billy.

- What the f*ck do

you know about it?

sh*t, f*ck, I'm sorry Cali.

I love you.

- We have rotted wood all

underneath the sink here.

- I found this.

Under the bed, Billy drew this?

- No.

That was somebody else.

- Calliope, you

need to talk to me.

- Roy, not right now.

- No, I've had enough of this.

Do you understand

what this is like?

Do you get it, at all?

I'm trying so hard, Cali,

to not think you're

just a f*cking liar,

and everything you've

told me about yourself is

a f*cking lie, and the life

we've been building together,

is a f*cking lie.

- Roy...

- Are you a f*cking liar, Cali?

Talk to me!

- Roy, you're hurting me!

- Calliope, f*ck, I am...

- It's your birthday

next month, 18, wow.

We should do something,

have a party.

Oh wait I forgot,

that will never work,

you don't have any friends.

- Mom.

- You know, in a month,

you're gonna be an adult,

and then you can do

whatever the hell you want,

but while you're

here, in my house...

- Mom.

- You will do exactly...

- Just stop it.

- What?

- Just stop with the whole

concerned parent thing.

You don't do it very well.

- You're really something else,

after everything I have done...

You wanna go back to him?

- Dad?

- You know who I

mean, where were you?

- I told you.

- Yeah, your dads,

should I call him?

- Oh, I don't think I'm

supposed to have any of that.

- I made it weak.

So, tell me about Billy.

- She was gorgeous, I mean,

not movie gorgeous

or anything, just...

First thing I thought

when I saw her,

was how tired she was,

that nobody that young

should be so God damn tired.

She had these deep sunk

eyes, that just dug in

like corkscrews, and

this thin little mouth,

that I thought, I don't

know, I kind of thought,

I just wanted to kiss.

I always wanna f*ck the

girls when I see them.

I can't seem to help it.

My eyes are words

straight to my prick,

doesn't matter who they are.

The first thing I think

when I see them is

how I wanna get them naked,

I wanna get them under me.

And I wanna f*ck the God

damn sh*t out of them.

But with her, all I wanted is,

I just kind of wanted that kiss.

All I thought about for days.

I should've left

it there, I guess.

I thought she could

make me normal,

I've never been with

a normal girl before,

but I thought, I don't

know, maybe she could do it.

Maybe I could love her normal.

And then when she was gone,

I felt like my chest

was this big black cave.

I was 17 God damn years old,

and I felt like it was over.

I was dead.

I guess maybe that's why

they call me Dead Billy.

I know what you're thinking,

I know what you wanna

do, don't think I don't.

It's okay, you know.

Hey, look at me.

It's okay.

It's okay Cali, it's

okay, it's okay.

It's okay, it's okay.

- How long were you?

- I don't remember.

- Come on, I'm not

paying by the hour here.

- A long time, I think

they took me away.

- Who?

- A social worker, my mom.

I think I was 17

when they got me out.

- You know it wasn't

your fault, right?

Calliope, you were just a kid.

It wasn't your fault.

- You're lovely.

- Calliope.

- Roy, listen...

Listen to me.

I wanted to be there.

I'm not exactly

who you think I am.

- Please, don't do

this, I love you.

- I love you too.

- So, what about the drawing?

- It doesn't matter.

- Calliope!

- Look, I have to go somewhere,

to talk to somebody.

- Him?

- I don't know,

maybe, I hope not.

- I wanna go with you.

- I'm sorry.

- I don't understand this.

Do you still...

Do you still want him?

- I want the best environment

for her too, I do.

What am I doing, how

do you know that?

That's what I used to do Kay,

I'm trying to be a father now,

I'm trying to be a

member of a family,

and that's what you said...

- Bill, you better get

your a*s in here before...

- That's all you talk about now.

I want to, I'd learned that.

No, that's what this is, I

know that, I know the legal.

God damn it Kay, she's

my f*cking kid too.

Yeah, well, I'm not the one

who's being a c**t about it!

- Gotta listen to him shout

like that all the time?

- Don't f*cking Bogart,

okay, this sh*t ain't cheap!

- Billy?

- You having a flashback Bill?

- Billy.

- Don't!

- Get out!

- Look at me.

Cali, look at me.

- What about your mom?

I got room, you know, if

you need a place, anything,

you know, no

strings, or nothing.

- I don't know, maybe.

- I'd really like to draw you.

What, I can draw.

- Billy?

- I'm sorry I scared you.

- It's okay, what happened?

What did she say to you?

- Don't leave, okay?

- What?

- You can k*ll me

if you want to,

slit my throat in my sleep or

something, just don't leave.

- I'm not going to

k*ll you Billy, Jesus.

And I'm not going anywhere,

you're stuck with me.

- Lovers and mad men have

such seething brains.

- Such shaping fantasies

that apprehend,

more than quarries,

it never comprehends.

- I live in this neighborhood,

and on the side of my house,

is all these Morning Glories.

Which is awesome, if you go

running at 7:00 in the morning,

I don't, but if you

did, you would see...

The morning glories

were just out,

like they haven't gotten

used to the weather.

- What you want?

- It's a two drink

minimum, lady.

- A glass of zen, I guess.

- All right guys, we

got a lot of show.

I'm Sarah Katie,

thank you very much.

- Did you come to party?

I f*cking came to party

All right, b*tches right!

We got two more b*tches

for you tonight,

come in here, tell some

jokes, make you laugh.

This next b*tch comes all

the way from New York,

f*cking City, and if you ask me,

she is pretty full of

herself, so give it up for

the b*tch, Melissa Kononen!

- Yeah, b*tches, right.

Right, right, right.

Hey guys, so I'm

Melissa Kononen,

and I'm gonna ask

you how you're doing,

but please, do not

applaud, you can boo,

you can do whatever

you want, please,

just do what is in your heart.

How are you guys doing?

Uh, that's a little like...

It's not like aah, yeah,

that's like a medium.

So, if you ask me, you

probably don't give a f*ck,

but I'm going to tell

you, I'm doing awful.

I woke up with a cold, and

I'm delirious at this point,

and to be honest, I'm kind

of loving it right now,

having this cold, because

it's my own little portable

disease, that I get to

take with me everywhere,

it's all mine, not

yours, it's mine,

my disease, mine, mine, mine!

And I get to sleep

with it in the night,

I'm like oh, it's my cold,

oh disease, you're okay,

you're mine, oh I get

to cuddle with you.

I had vegan chili earlier,

and it gave me heartburn.

And I didn't like it, you

know what else I hate?

I hate it when nice dudes

refuse to call women c**ts.

You know, specifically

this woman, because um,

if you don't call me a c**t,

I'm gonna find someone else

who will, and they

will probably suck.

- You're weird!

- Oh, great, woo!

Like this guy right here,

he fits the description,

how you doing man?

- Tell a joke all ready.

- What's your name?

Come on, what's your name?

- Um, Dave.

- Oh, Dave, that's

your real voice?

When you're not

putting a voice on,

you're like ugh, um,

Dave, hey um Dave.

So, call me a f*cking

c**t right now.

Call me a f*cking c**t,

do it, we're all waiting!

We're all waiting

for you um Dave,

we're all waiting for you

to call me a f*cking c**t,

so call me a f*cking c**t!

I heard you earlier,

come on, do it.

Don't worry about

her, she won't mind,

she likes it, she likes

when you call her a c**t,

so why don't you

do it to me man?

Call me a f*cking c**t, no?

All right, fine, whatever,

just being a p*ssy.

See all you nice guys

out there, please,

just do me a favor,

call me a f*cking c**t,

when I'm being a f*cking c**t.

So I can stop hearing it

from a*usive assholes.

Okay, nope, you know what

I also don't understand?

What's really wrong with

f*cking your cousin.

- Four sugars!

- Sorry.

- Jesus Cali, how

many times I have to...

- I'm sorry, Billy.

- What the f*ck is

wrong with you anyway?

You, go, go!

- No, he's 66 years

old, but he drinks pee.

The thing is, so I don't

know, just looking at him,

makes me wonder if

it works because,

they say it helps your

body diagnose sicknesses,

if you don't drink caffeine,

or alcohol, or eat meat...

- Hi, how you doing, oh wow

look at this, that is my face.

c**t face, there you are.

- Thank you.

- Use protection.

Well, that was sh*t.

- It was precious.

- Oh, f*ck you.

- Got another one.

- Lovely.

- Water, no ice, please.

Hi.

You were really good.

- Can I have that?

Mmm.

- f*ck you Alyssa.

- Do I know you?

- Um, kind of.

- Oh, f*ck.

- None of this is

real by the way,

but actually, it is all real.

- Yo, this your ride?

- Yeah.

- Toss me the keys, I

wanna show you something.

So, I assume it's no coincidence,

you showing up here?

- No.

- Oh f*ck yeah, this is my jam!

f*cking c**t!

What the f*ck?

- Alyssa?

- What?

- What was it you

wanted to show me?

- What?

- What was it you

wanted to show me?

- Oh, honey, let's

get f*cked up first!

Come on.

Hey, look at me, are you okay?

Once every three or four months,

but we'd never do anything,

he'd just stand there, and look.

When I was younger, I

pretended like I was asleep,

like I knew it was

creepy or whatever,

but I didn't know why, and

then when I got a little older

I would stare right back at

him, never told him to leave.

And he'd still just,

you know, stand there.

Anyway, I told my mom.

Yeah, a few years ago, she

called me a lying little b*tch.

Billy was never so bad.

At least he didn't stare.

You know, he tried to k*ll

himself after you left, right?

He said he was gonna

go jump off a bridge.

And that was about

the time he started

calling me all the f*cking

time, and leaving these,

like, long a*s messages,

and sometimes he'd cry.

Then, you know, I mean,

he called me to tell me

that you came back, after that,

he didn't call me anymore.

Did you find him

sexy or something?

- Yeah, I did.

- Oh, that's weird, what

do you even know about him?

- He said he fought in Vietnam.

- Really?

- He said he was

in Danang for a year.

- Billy said a lot of things.

He told my mom that he made

a fortune selling rare coins.

He told me that he was a

rough Necker in California,

and that he shat,

shot, I'm sorry,

he shot a guy in the

back of the head,

because the guy broke

into his apartment,

and was trying to stab

him in the kidney.

And he said that he went to

that guys grave to piss on it,

but it was Memorial Day,

and there were like...

There were all

these people around,

so he settled for

just spitting on it.

He didn't tell you

that story, did he?

What are you doing

here, little Cali?

- I need to find him.

- Why?

He's dead, I mean,

probably, right?

I mean, you wanna

know what I think?

You probably don't, but

I'm gonna tell you anyway.

I think that you miss him.

I think that you love him.

- I...

You don't know

what he did to me.

- What he did to you.

Come on, I was gonna show

you something, come on.

See this tree here?

My mom, she hated Billy,

and then when I told her

about my step dad, you

know, just staring,

she hated him too,

but not at first.

She didn't believe me at first.

Then she thought about it,

and my step dad dropped dead

one day, while mowing the lawn.

I was away, she was alone.

I told her about what he did

to me and then I left her.

I was gone when

she drove out here,

and she sat at the

base of this tree.

She had my step dad's p*stol.

Billy wasn't

serious, but she was.

What did you do to him Cali?

- What?

- What did you do to him?

I mean, you went back right?

And my mom was dead, and

I thought he and I could,

I don't know, I don't

know, work on things maybe.

He was the only f*cking

family that I had left.

What the f*ck.

- Stop!

- Cali, look at me.

You can go out with

him, if you want to.

I mean, if you really want to.

- Should I call him?

- Mom, shut...

- What the hell

is wrong with you?

Him, and then this man,

is that who you wanna be?

- You wanna go back to him?

Okay, go ahead, I'm not

gonna stop you, go, go, go!

- You okay?

- No.

- So, do you wanna

talk about it?

You know what I used to

do when I first started?

I just shut my eyes,

and go away somewhere.

Some place where I could

be anybody other than me.

Not like a movie star or

anything, just a wife, maybe.

And a mom.

I'd see myself in

a suburb somewhere,

working from home as a graphic

designer, interior decorator.

I used to draw, I was

pretty good at it.

Anyway, something like that.

I'd have three kids, twin

boys, and a little girl.

Her name would be Emma

Rose, and the boys would

be called Jack and Joshua.

My husband would work

in real estate, David,

but I'd call him

Dee, a handsome guy,

sort of soft, skinny with a

little potbelly, weak eyes.

I always had a thing

for guys in glasses.

He'd come home early

from work sometimes,

and we'd take the

kids out to dinner.

Nothing fancy, Chuck E Cheese,

wherever the kids wanted to go.

Our five year anniversary,

he'd take me to this little,

this little bed and breakfast

up in the mountains,

and we'd wander the

streets, and window shop.

Afterwards, go back

up to the hotel room

and make love for

hours, by candlelight.

He'd always be gentle.

In the morning, he'd

give me this little pair

of diamond stud earrings.

All he could afford

without taking out a loan,

so nothing all that

special, but nice, lovely.

Our life would be lovely.

So that's what I think about

when the men would be doing,

you know, what they'd be doing.

And it helped, for a while,

for a while I thought

it may even still be possible.

He could still be

out there, my Dee,

and maybe we could still meet.

And he could give me my

lovely little life somewhere,

where I could be somebody else.

This is it, I'd say.

This guy, this hundred bucks,

I'm done, I'm getting out.

Now I can barely

remember what he was

supposed to look like, my Dee.

He left this out here, he

didn't want you to see it.

He told me to be gone

before you woke up.

He's never gonna get

any better, Cali.

Cali, none of this is ever

going to get any better.

- Ma'am, can you hear me?

Nod if you understand.

Need you to follow my fingers

without moving your head.

- Was it, I don't know, was

it a stroke or something?

- I see no evidence

of a concussion,

or any other lasting damage,

so you're free to go.

Do you have someone who

can come pick you up?

- So, there's nothing more

you can tell us, Ma'am?

Ma'am, you're sure there's

nothing more you can tell us?

- Cali, I'm here to help you.

Do you understand?

Your mom's on her way.

- Not her.

- It isn't up to you Cali.

- What are you

gonna do with him?

- He's going to jail.

- Ma'am, if this

was your boyfriend,

we have resources that

we can help you with.

- Hello.

- Hi.

- What?

- I'm, I'm sorry.

- It's not your fault,

I should have known better.

I don't know what the

f*ck I was thinking.

- I, um...

- What?

- Can I still...

Can I come to your place?

- Didn't you all

ready leave him once?

I'm sorry, I thought...

I don't know, I don't

know what I thought.

I don't need this

sh*t, okay, good luck.

- Roy.

- We're sorry,

you have reached a number

that has been disconnected

or is no longer in service.

If you feel you have reached

this recording in error,

please check the number

or try your call again.

We're sorry...

I've got something for you

Oh, don't turn me down

Leave me cold and blue

Don't break my heart

- Cali, look at me.

- We didn't.

- I know.

You're beautiful, you know that?

You need to know that there

was never anyone else but me.

I love you.

- I love you too.

- Roy?

- I've been thinking,

and if you want,

we could, you know, have

him over some night.

I mean, only if you want.

You two, obviously, I mean...

It could be hot, right?

Oh f*ck it, look, if you want,

we'll have him over, and you

know, you two can do whatever.

You were cool with Selena,

I can be cool with this.

If you want, I

could be way cool.

Jesus, not too much, okay?

You only need a pinch

to bring out the flavor.

Anyway, Cali.

- So what's next Cali?

Calliope, okay, you know what,

you can give me the silent

treatment, if you want,

that's fine, I'm gonna call him.

You know what else, I'm

gonna tell him he can

f*ck you for a 100 bucks.

50, if he lets me watch.

- Look at me Cali.

Look at me.

Look at me!

- Morning.

- You're a lying little b*tch.

- You...

- Oh my God, oh my God.

Oh my God, oh my God, sh*t.

I gotta call somebody!

- Now, say you're sorry.

- I'm sorry.

- Good, I forgive you.

It's good to see you.

You remember, remember

that song I wrote for you.

How did that go?

Your stars are

fire, you stop the sun

The truth of me may be a liar

But never doubt my love

You know, I never wanted...

I sorry, I'm f*cking

this up, God damn it.

You know, I've always

known it was wrong,

the whole you and me thing.

I didn't want it to be, it was.

But it was, I just,

I wanted you so much.

And I really wanted it to

be different this time,

I thought that maybe you could,

you were my chance to...

Ah sh*t, I don't know.

So, I guess maybe,

I made things worse.

I told myself all

the usual things,

how you were mature,

you were an old soul,

whatever the f*ck,

you were a kid.

I should never have...

So anyway, I guess, I think

I sort of took it out on you.

But I did love you,

I do love you, you...

Jesus Christ Cali, you

were the best thing that

ever happened to me,

and I f*cked it up.

- No, no you didn't.

When you're through with me

When your heart aches

When your head spins

When you tempt me

When you finish me

When you cut me

When you k*ll me

When you forgive me

We did.

When you want to hold me

If you bury me

If you lose me

Don't say the word

Don't waste your time

Don't expect me

Just get rid of me

Just break me

Okay.

- I'm gonna get your nose.

- No, I'll bite your nose off.

- No hands.

I have something for you.

- Uh huh, what?

Now that the stars are on fire,

thou that the sun doth move.

Doubt truth to be a liar,

but never doubt my love.

I'm sorry Billy,

but I've gotta go.