- Oh, that was the best one yet.
Mmm-mmm.
You got to love these
Valentine's Day deliveries.
Oh, do we have any
of those candy hearts
with the little messages on 'em?
- Uh, no.
But I've got some
fancy-pants perfume for you.
- [yowls]
- [chuckles]
[both coughing]
- Get rid of it!
Get rid of it!
- Mm, okay,
what about this one, Julien?
Roses are red,
violets are green,
you are so handsome,
you make all the ladies scream.
- [squawks]
- It's no use, Maurice.
I am a king without a kingdom.
Where is all the adoration,
the fawning,
the brown-nosing?
Is anybody even listening
to me up there?
Ow!
Uh, what the--
"Love Potion Number "?
How does this thing
work, anyway?
- Ow!
[laughs]
Stop it, stop it.
That tickles.
[laughs]
- "Irresistible."
[Maurice chuckling]
[gasps]
Maurice.
Do you see
what is happening here?
- Make 'em stop.
Make 'em stop.
- It is a message
from the Gods.
They are looking down
from the heavens
and saying,
"King Julien,"
and I say,
"Ugh, what do you want now?"
And they say,
"Sorry to disturb you,
"oh, great
and most dashing king
with all the best
dance moves."
And I say,
"Oh, do you mean like this?"
"Yes, we love that."
"So get on with it.
What do you want already?"
"Even though
you're all these great things,
you deserve more."
"Oh, go on."
"King Julien,
take this potion,
"and from this moment forth,
you will be known
as the king of love."
Oh!
- King of love?
- Come, Maurice.
We have much work to do.
- Wake up, Africa.
It's Valentine's Day.
Happy Valentine's Day
to you,
and happy Valentine's Day to you
and you, you, you, and you.
all:
Pah! What's Valentine's Day?
- Hold up. Don't tell me
you've never heard of...
- The best day of the year!
Whoo!
- Wow. You're really
into this holiday, huh?
- Please, you have no idea.
- We love you, Alex!
- [chuckles]
And I love this holiday!
[imitating cheers]
Oh, Alex!
- So what do we do with these?
- That's the best part.
Once you get a valentine,
you get to give one back.
Here, I'll start you off.
"Dear Alex, you're the best.
Love you, ostrich."
See, now I can display it
right here
on my very own valentine's tree.
Huh? Huh?
Whoa, hey,
ooh, what's going on?
- King Julien's selling
a magical love potion.
I want some!
- A love potion?
- I want some.
- Wait for me!
- Hey, hey, hey.
Wait up!
Guys, valentine's tree.
- It's not going anywhere.
- And neither are we, Alex.
Now, come on, let's go see
what that psychotic lemur's
up to now.
- Uh, you know what--
I think you guys--
You guys go ahead.
I'll catch up later.
- Where is he going?
- Uh, acupuncture appointment?
- Yep.
Definitely acupuncture.
Come on.
Got to go.
[upbeat music]
♪ ♪
- ♪ Her name
is G-L-O-R-I-A ♪
♪ Gloria ♪
- No, stop.
Stop, stop.
Come on, you guys.
This is my first Valentine's Day
with Gloria.
This surprise
has to be perfect.
[all hooting]
Aah! No, no, no!
What are you doing?
- Ugh, look at him--
all stressed out
and driving everyone crazy.
- Skipper, what are you
gonna get Hula Girl
for Valentine's Day?
- [scoffs]
Nothing.
No hokey knickknacks
or cheesy gestures needed here.
Isn't that right,
doll face?
- Drama.
- What the...
- [trumpets]
- Ladies and gentlemen,
gather around.
Today is your lucky day,
because the king of love's
love potion spectacular
is about to begin.
[excited chatter]
- ♪ Go take your troubles
to the king of love ♪
♪ That's me ♪
♪ The heavens sent me
from above ♪
- Ow!
- ♪ Go on, everybody ♪
♪ Get into a line ♪
♪ Try a little spray ♪
♪ Of love potion number ♪
- Oh, me, me,
me, me.
I'll try it.
- Aha!
Here's a young fellow
I've never met, ever.
Let me guess, little
irritating pest like yourself,
probably not too popular,
are you?
- No, I'm not popular!
[sobs]
- Your luck's about to change.
- Ow!
- Just sign this contract
committing you
to eternal servitude,
and I will make you
irresistible.
- Yes, let's do it!
- Open your eye.
- Ow!
It burns!
[coughs]
- [sniffing]
Oh. Ooh.
all: Whoo!
- Ew.
- Dang.
- Well, hello.
Aren't you just
the most adorable little thing
I've ever seen?
- Whoo!
all: Ahh.
- Come on!
It's a dude.
- [giggles]
- [clicks tongue, smooching]
- Mm-mm. Mm-mm.
- Do it.
- [groans]
- Oh.
- [smooching]
- I'm irresistible!
[cheers and applause]
- I want to be irresistible!
- Me too!
- Sign here.
Sign here.
- I like you.
- How do you like me now?
- No!
[sobs]
- Next.
- I want some.
- Me too.
- Right here, right here.
- Aw, come on, fellas.
You're not buying
all of this, are you?
- Well, I ain't buying it.
[laughs]
I mean, a love potion?
Zebras, please.
- Whoa.
all: whoa!
- I ain't never seen
a zebra like you before.
- I'm not a zebra.
I'm an okapi.
- Crack-a-lackin'.
all:
Crack-a-lackin'.
- Where did you come from?
- Just visiting
from another reserve.
- Hey, I can show you around.
- So could I.
- So could I.
- So could I.
- Me too.
- I know this place
better than anyone.
- Aw, looks like somebody
got bit by the love bug.
- Yeah, well,
so did all of them.
- Okay.
See you later, then.
all: Bye.
- If only I had something
to make me stand out
from the pack.
- ♪ Love potion number ♪
Irresistible.
Ha!
I mean, nice doing business
with you.
- Marty, there's no such thing
as a love potion.
- You could make her a card.
- Spray me.
- Open your eye.
[air pffts]
Whoops.
Fresh out.
- No, no, Julien,
you got to get me more.
- What do I look like,
a wizard?
I don't know
how to make that stuff.
- Fine. No love potion,
no contract.
- [exclaims]
You'll hear from my attorney.
Maurice,
you're my attorney.
Can he do that?
- I don't know.
- Wait.
What am I supposed
to do now?
- You're the king of love.
Figure it out!
- [hollers]
- A love potion?
- Yes, I need you
to make me another batch of it.
- Negative, twinkle toes.
- What? Why?
- I don't like you.
- And besides,
the only place
to find ingredients
like these around here
is at the human safari camp.
- Forget it.
That place is a death trap.
- Skipper, I need
pink coconuts
for Gloria's tiara, stat!
- Whoa.
Sounds like a blast.
But we've got a rendezvous
at the human safari camp.
- [groans] Where's a monkey
when you need one?
- Ugh, fellas, if I ever let
some doll get to me
like that,
just put me down.
What?
What did I do?
- Target identified, sir.
All clear.
Skipper.
- This silent treatment
is k*lling me.
Just tell me
what's bothering you.
- [clears throat]
- I can't get into this
right now, doll face.
Keep lookout.
We'll be back in a jiff.
- Whoo.
Today must be my lucky day.
[chuckles]
- I tell you, fellas, it's like
I'm talking to a piece of wood.
How am I supposed
to know what she's thinking?
- [groans]
- I mean, I'm not a mind reader.
- What is going on in here?
Penguins?
- You can only get so far
when the conversation's
all one-sided.
- Rico.
- [grunts]
- Fire!
Stop, drop, and roll!
- One minute,
everything's peachy,
and the next,
sneak attack.
Flanks me
with the cold shoulder.
- Skipper,
with all due respect...
- [grunts]
- you and your lady friend
need to patch things up,
pronto.
- You're right.
I deserved that.
- Um, Skipper, there's something
you need to see up here.
- Whoa.
- This better be important,
Private.
[shouts]
[Hawaiian music playing]
Shiitake mushrooms.
- Penguins!
Get them!
- Hula girl!
- We'll deal with this later.
- Doll face!
- Rose petals?
- Check.
- Water?
- Check.
- Is it ready yet?
There must be zebras
all up in her face right now.
- Come on, Marty.
This thing's not gonna
make you irresistible.
- Trying to work here.
- Melman?
Ugh.
Where did that giraffe go?
- Chop, chop, Kowalski.
I need that potion now.
A couple more love songs
on that ukulele,
and I'll be done for.
- All right, everybody out.
Out, out, out.
Final ingredient.
- Hexyl cinnamaldehyde.
- Hexyl cinna-what?
- I don't know.
Just improvise.
- Love bug?
- Why not?
[splash]
- Oh!
- [coughing] Gentlemen,
love potion number .
- Finally.
Oh!
- Hey.
- Sorry.
- Marty, wait.
- Alex, come here.
Is something going on?
- What?
- Is Melman avoiding me?
- No.
No, I--Marty!
- Should I make you
another batch?
- There's no time.
Don h*'s not stealing my girl
without a fight.
- Marty, this will never work.
- You never know
unless you try.
- Ow. What the--
- He's right, freak.
The joke will be on you
when my magic potion
works its magic.
- And the water buffalo said,
"That's not my mama."
[laughs]
- [sniffing]
- I'll admit it.
I like romantic comedies.
- Hey, where's she going?
We were talking.
- What's she doing?
- Hello?
- Hi, there.
- [gasps]
She spoke to me!
Did I say that out loud?
- [giggles] I don't know
what it is about you,
but there's something
that I just find...
irresistible.
- Wow.
- Check it out.
It's actually working.
- ♪ Can it be permissible? ♪
[all sniffing]
♪ She compromised
my principle ♪
♪ Yeah, yeah ♪
[all screaming]
- whoa.
- ♪ She's a craze
you'd endorse ♪
♪ She's a powerful force ♪
♪ You're obliged to conform ♪
♪ When there's
no other course ♪
- Gah!
- ♪ But now I find her ♪
♪ Simply irresistible ♪
- Whoo!
[laughing]
Higher!
Higher!
all:
Whoo!
- Yeah!
Whoo!
- Call me.
- ♪ Simply irresistible ♪
- Hey, Alex.
Welcome to the love shack.
- Oh, wow.
Yeah, this is really something.
- Oh, you got to read
some of these valentines.
I didn't think
they could find a word
to rhyme with "magnificent,"
but they did.
[laughter]
- Yeah, you know,
speaking of valentines,
I realized I still
hadn't given you yours.
So...
- Great.
Throw it on the pile.
- Oh. How could I have missed
the pile?
Okay.
I'll just be on my way, then.
Unless you have something...
- [sighs]
That's the stuff.
- For me.
- Smells like jojoba.
[laughter]
Oh, did you say
something, al...
Alex?
- Any requests, Marty?
- Free Bird?
- [scoffs]
At least I never needed
a magic love potion
to get my valentines.
They came naturally.
- I don't know, Julien.
This doesn't look like
the one the penguins made.
- Don't worry, hippo woman.
I threw in
a few new ingredients
to kick it up a notch.
That giraffe won't know
what hit him.
- Nice try, Julien.
- Alex!
- Seriously, Gloria, come on.
Not you too?
- But I think
I might be losing Melman.
- You are.
- You're not losing Melman.
You don't need this.
- Yes, you do.
- Oh, I don't know
what to think anymore!
- Gloria.
[sighs]
Could this day
get any worse?
Ow!
What was that?
- A wake-up call.
- Wake-up--
What are you talking about?
- You used to be
a New York giant.
Now your hair's a mess,
and you're all alone.
- Yeah, well, it's your fault.
Your stupid potion
is making everybody crazy.
- Is it? Or are you crazy
not to try it?
- Yeah, right.
- You can be irresistible,
just like you were
back in New York.
Close your eyes.
Can you hear the crowd
screaming your name?
Ahh!
We love you, freak!
They're going crazy for you.
Do you hear it?
- Yeah, I can hear them.
- Freak, freak, freak, freak.
- Freak.
- They can't control themselves!
Freak! Freak!
- Freak! Freak!
- Don't you want that
back again?
- I do.
- Sign here.
- Wah.
- Now go get your mojo back.
- [sniffing]
What is that smell?
- Ladies and gentlemen,
Alex the lion.
Roar.
[chuckles]
- Ugh, you reek.
- Oh, my gosh.
Oh, I'm gonna be sick.
- Me too.
- Get away from us.
- Hey, wait!
[sighs]
[Free Bird]
♪ ♪
- How long is this song?
- Whoo!
- Ugh.
- Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah!
- I think I need a little air.
- Hey, where's Marty?
- Marty?
- [sighs]
That's more like it.
- What's more like it?
[laughs]
- Oh.
All right.
Why don't you take five, ladies?
I need a little Marty time.
- Sounds great.
- Come on, everybody.
It's Marty time.
- [chuckles]
You guys are funny.
But, seriously,
I need a little space.
A little more space, please.
More space!
More space!
Hey, look, there's Marty!
all:
Where?
- [screaming]
- Easy, easy.
Perfect.
- Save yourself!
- Save my what?
Oh, oh!
Oh.
- Melman?
- Gloria?
- Melman?
- [screams]
[monkeys scream]
- Melman, why don't you want
to spend time with me today?
- What?
No, it's not you, it's--
- It's me?
You're dumping me?
- I'm what?
- On Valentine's Day?
- No!
- You sick, sick giraffe!
- Gloria.
[all yelling]
- I don't want to be
irresistible anymore!
- Come back, Marty.
- Wait, where's Marty?
[sniffs]
Um, what are we doing here?
- Who's Marty?
- Beats me.
- Ooh, girl,
I hope that's not permanent.
- No more love potion.
[sighs]
- Operation hula rescue
is a go.
- [gasps]
Skipper.
She's heavily guarded.
- Not for long.
Hyah! Huh!
Ha!
Listen up, pretty boy,
I may not have your perfect tan
or your chiseled abs,
but I've got something
you'll never have--
a wounded heart.
Doll face, it took losing you
to realize how much I need you
in my life.
[shushing]
Just let me talk.
I used to think Valentine's Day
was just a superficial holiday
for sissies,
wussies, and pansies.
But now I realize
that buying cheap flowers
or some prepackaged chocolate
isn't just a wacked-out
merchandising conspiracy.
It's also just
a nice thing to do.
- [gasps]
Not again!
- Skipper, code red!
- Handle it!
[engine turns over]
- Bye-bye.
- Little hula girl,
I'm begging you.
Will you take me back?
Is that a yes or no?
- [laughs]
[grunts]
Not my bobbleheads!
Oh, stop it!
[screams]
- Is it, yes,
you need more time,
or, no,
you're not ready to answer?
Oh, come on, make up your mind.
- You are mine now!
- It's a yes!
- Aww.
- Well, no hard feelings, kid.
Hope we can all stay friends?
- No!
[screams]
- [eating]
I don't get it.
What happened today?
Well, it's his loss.
I'm over it.
[grunts and shrieks]
[gasps]
What in the world?
"Music, dance number,
Lady Liberty float"?
Oh, Melman.
- Come on, Julien.
I need that potion.
- Mm, I don't know.
Skinny, sickly guy
like yourself--
what could you
possibly do for me?
- I can reach tall places.
- Okay, deal.
- Don't you make that deal,
Melman Mankiewicz.
- Oh, great,
they're gonna make up.
[scoffs] Come on, Frankie.
[Frankie trumpets]
- Okay, this is, like,
the sweetest thing
that anyone's ever tried
to do for me.
- Yeah.
Until I ruined it.
- Baby, I didn't need
all this.
All I wanted to know was that
you were thinking about me.
- Oh, I-I was thinking
about you.
- Oh.
- Yeah, well, here's someone
none of us
were thinking about.
- Oh.
- [winces]
- You know what?
I think I know something
that might cheer him up.
- "Roses are red,
violets are blue,
"I love writing myself
valentines,
but no one else seems
to do it to me."
Hmm.
Too wordy.
Huh?
"I'm sorry"?
What the...
- Uh, we know it's not like
it was back at the zoo, but...
- We could make you
some more.
- No.
You got it just right.
It's not about
how many cards you get.
It's about who you
get them from.
- Aw.
- Aw.
[all sniffing]
- Wow.
No offense, but you stink.
- You need a bath.
- In turpentine.
[Frankie trumpets]
- Ladies and gentlemen,
gather around.
- Oh, not again.
- The king of love is back
with a brand-new bottle of...
- And the lucky freak who gets
to try it first will be...
- Ha ha!
- Aah!
- [trumpets]
- [screams]
[coughs]
[exclamations]
It's okay.
It's okay.
There's still some left.
Now, who wants it?
[exclamations]
- Oh, that is disgusting!
- [retches]
- Oh, King Julien, ah...
- Oh, that's
a nightmare coming.
- Hey, you can't leave.
You both signed the contract!
Maurice, you're my lawyer.
Do something.
- I would advise
against any sudden movement
right now, Julien.
- [exclaims]
Where is the love?
[rock music]
♪ ♪
- ♪ Jingle bells, jingle bells,
jingle all the way ♪
♪ Oh, what fun it is to ride
in a ' Chevrolet ♪
♪ Jingle bells, jingle, jingle,
jingle all the way ♪
♪ Oh, what fun it is to ride
in a one-horse open sleigh ♪
♪ Dashing through the snow ♪
- ♪ He's dashing ♪
- ♪ In a one-horse open sleigh ♪
- ♪ He's dashing ♪
- ♪ Over them fields we go ♪
- ♪ He's dashing ♪
- ♪ Laughing all the way ♪
- ♪ Now he's laughing ♪
- ♪ Bells on bob-- ♪
♪ Making them spirits bright ♪
♪ Oh, what fun it is to ride ♪
♪ And sing
a sleighing song tonight ♪
- [sighs]
- He looks so sad.
- Rico,
I want that tree up to muster.
- [grunting]
- Check.
Kowalski, What's the status on
the approved musical selection?
- Scheduled to begin now.
- Excelente.
Right on track.
- Skipper.
- Figgy pudding at hours.
Yule log to commence on my mark.
Engage.
- Yule log engaged.
- "Checkamundo."
- Skipper.
- Eggnog at hours.
Writing our names
in the snow at .
- Skipper.
- What is it, Private?
- Ted the polar bear
is all alone this holiday,
and he seems so sad.
Could we bring him a present
to cheer him up?
- Kowalski?
- Negative, Skipper,
we have four presents,
and there are four of us.
- We can go
and get him something.
- Sorry, Private, no can do.
- But no one should be sad
and alone on Christmas.
- Exactly.
So throw those troubles away
and be merry, pronto.
- But, Skipper...
- That's an order, mister.
All right, boys,
stand by for eggnog.
- Aye, aye, Skipper.
- Eggnog!
- Private.
- I'll pass, thank you.
- Eggnog, eggnog.
both: Go! Go! Go!
Go! Go! Go!
Chug! Chug! Chug! Chug!
Chug! Chug! Chug! Chug!
- Hold on, Rico.
That guy can really
hold his nog.
hours, boys.
Engage cranberries.
Rico.
Not at the table.
Hold on a second.
Something's missing.
- Cranberries. Check.
Eggnog. Check.
- Give me a head count.
- We have three heads, sir.
- Where's the Private?
- Unknown, sir. It would appear
that he's missing.
- Missing?
Hoover Dam!
Wait. There he is.
He just went to bed.
What the...?
What have you done
with Private?
Talk, mister.
- Skipper.
Over here.
- I'll deal with you later.
- Oh, no. He must be out there
all by himself.
- He's one of us, men.
You all know the penguin credo.
- Never bathe in hot oil
and Bisquick?
- No.
- [mumbling incoherently]
- No, that's the walrus credo.
It's never swim alone.
Private's out there
all by himself,
and we never leave
one of our own.
both: Oh.
- Yeah.
- Now let's go.
[car horns honking]
- Oh!
That's perfect.
Just the thing
for a sad polar bear.
- Kowalski.
Analysis.
- Adrenaline,
sweat, and sardines.
These tracks are fresh, sir.
- He's close.
I can feel it.
- What kind
of cut-rate junk is this?
It's lousy workmanship,
is what it is.
- We may have a problem.
- Everywhere I look, junk.
These are no good at all.
Junk!
- We need to get closer.
: , men.
Blend! Blend! Blend!
- Ha! So this is where you're
hiding all the good stuff.
- He's in trouble.
- Kaboom.
- Stand down, soldier.
We're in observation mode.
- Now, this is workmanship.
So where's the God-darn
squeaker on this thing?
It's got to have a squeaker.
- [flatulence]
- Now, that's more like it.
Hey, stupid.
I want this one.
- Grand Coulee Dam!
Private's been captured.
- Taxi!
- Not on my watch, blue hair.
Kowalski!
- Hey!
I'm walking here!
- I got a tip for you.
Drop dead!
- Good evening, ma'am.
Merry Christmas to you.
- Buzz off!
- Skipper, how are we going
to get inside?
- Kaboom! Kaboom!
- I got a better idea.
- Oy.
Oh, that's going to hurt.
Very generous, sir.
You have a merry Christmas.
- Hold that elevator.
- Skipper.
- Private.
Step on it, Kowalski.
What comes down must go up.
- Skipper.
- All right, men. Commence
Operation Special Delivery.
[locks clicking]
Shiitake mushrooms.
No more Mr. Cute and Cuddly.
- Kaboom, kaboom, kaboom!
- Rico, Enough
with the dynamite already.
- Why does Christmas have
to be every year?
What a pain in the...
The tape--it's so sticky.
Here we go.
Oh, you make such
a nice Christmas present
for my Mr. Chew.
Oh, now, Mr. Chew,
you have to wait until morning
to open your presents.
Yes, you do.
Who is Mommy's big boy?
Who is he?
- [growling]
- Nice doggie. Good doggie.
Now, good boy. Down, down.
Don't eat me, no.
Good boy.
No, leave me alone.
Don't eat me.
- Santa Claus has come to town.
- Oh, Skipper.
[screaming]
Help me, guys.
- Kowalski, secure the Private.
- I'm on it.
- Quadruped, canine,
: o'clock.
- I'm going to need
some cover fire.
- Rico.
[glass breaks]
[g*n c*ck]
[g*nf*re]
Kowalski, status!
- I'm almost there, Skipper.
- Let him have it, Rico.
- Aah!
- Oh! What a hit!
Ryan is down!
- Holly butterball.
- There's a loose ball
on the field.
- No. Don't eat me.
- Kowalski, give me options.
- Skipper.
- Excelente.
Engage
Operation Stocking Stuffer.
[whistles]
- [barking]
- Jensen in the end zone,
all by himself!
Ryan drops back and fires
a Hail Mary downfield!
Oh, he scores!
Oh, what a play!
- High five!
Low five!
Down low.
Too slow.
I think our work here is done.
Rico...
she didn't see anything.
- And that's the game,
ladies and gentlemen...
- Let's blow
this popsicle stand, boys.
- Kaboom?
- Yes, Rico.
Kaboom.
Come on, boys.
- Aah!
What is all this?
Mr. Chew, this is
all your fault.
Bad dog.
You are on a big time-out.
- Thanks
for rescuing me, Skipper.
- Think nothing of it,
young Private.
It's the least we could do.
You remember the penguin credo.
- What does deep-frying
in Bisquick
have to do with any of this?
- Not that one,
the other one.
"Never swim alone."
Alone!
On Christmas.
Don't you get it?
Come on, people, do I have
to explain this to everybody?
- Poor Ted.
He's all alone on Christmas
with no one to swim with.
- It's not too late,
young Private.
I've got a new plan
to fit him in.
all:
♪ Fa la la la la ♪
♪ La la la la ♪
- You guys.
Seriously, this is the best
Christmas I've ever had.
- Well, there it is, then.
Merry Christmas for everyone.
[doorbell rings]
What the...?
Who could that be?
- Oh, I hope you don't mind.
I invited a few friends over.
- What?
- Good-byes can be
bittersweet.
It seems like only
days ago we were snatched
from our beloved
Central Park Zoo
and dumped here in...
rustic Madagascar.
But now that we're leaving,
seeing you all here,
it reminds us just how many
friends we've made.
[one animal applauding]
- Whoo-hoo!
That's the greatest speech
I've ever...
- Oh, Looks like the kid
can't hold his seawater.
- Well, at least he showed up.
- I don't get it. It's not like
Julien to miss a party.
- Well, maybe for some people,
saying good-bye is really hard.
- Yeah, well, send him
a postcard,
'cause the wind's
right on schedule.
All right, let's do this.
- Can I have your attention?
The red-eye to New York
is about to board!
- Whoo!
We're going home for Christmas!
- Sandbags!
- Check!
- Ropes!
- Check!
- Snacks!
- [mouth full] Check!
- It's working!
- We did it!
- It may not be pretty,
but we're headed to the city.
Whoo!
Candied yams from Sylvia's...
that's what I want
for Christmas.
- Uh-uh. I can't wait to get
back to my hippo pool
and that sweet smell
of chlorine.
- And I can't wait
to see Dr. Maneesh,
greatest chiropractor ever.
- Me? I just want to see
the snow falling down
on my beautiful city.
New York, here we come!
Ow!
What the...?
[all gasp]
- Look out!
[all screaming]
- No, no, no, no, no!
This isn't happening.
[all grunting]
- Ow! Hey!
- Stop it! Get off me!
- Shh, shh, shh.
Guys, did you hear something?
[gasps] Cannibals!
- Cannibals? Where?
- Julien!
- It's just the freaks.
- Oy vey.
- Maurice, I thought
they left already.
I hope we're still
charging them rent.
Mort, stop drumming already!
- Sorry.
- False alarm, everyone!
Back into hiding.
It was just a cruel hoax.
- Hoax? What kind
of sick joke is this, huh?
- Sorry. We thought you were
the Marauding Red Night Goblin.
- The Marauding Red What-ing?
- Maurice.
Every year on the th
of Julianuary...
- Julianuary?
- It's a festive holiday
named after His Majesty.
- It starts with a red glow,
then the air fills
with the Goblin's horrible,
mocking laughter,
then he pelts us with hundreds
of black rocks!
- Red Night Goblin!
The Red Night Goblin's coming!
- Okay, I get it.
It's picking-on-the-King day.
Very funny.
[distant screaming]
- [gasps]
- You can stop now, Mort.
I know it's you back there.
Red Night Goblin!
- He's real!
- What's happening?
- Here, Julien.
- Hide the women
and precious metals!
Load the sh**ting thingies!
Fire on the Goblin!
Lemurs down.
You, you...
Take their places.
both: Aye, aye!
- That's it.
I surrender!
- We're going to die!
- Alex, do something!
- All right, all right,
all right.
[grunting]
- [screaming]
- You're going down,
Red Night Marauding Goblin Guy!
- I did it, everybody!
[all cheering]
I did it!
- Aah!
- Everyone after the Goblin.
Don't let him get away.
- Candy canes?
- Presents?
- [chokes, spitting]
These rocks taste like coal.
- Hang on a minute.
Alex...
I think you just shot down...
- Who's laughing now,
Red Night Goblin?
[laughing]
I am, that's who.
- h* h* h*!
Merry Madagascar!
- [sighs]
I shot down Santa.
- Oh, you gonna be on
the naughty list for sure now.
- Is it safe?
- Is what safe?
- Are there more of you?
How many?
Tell me!
Are you a robot?
Maybe you have an army
hidden inside of you.
Talk to me, robot army.
I am talking to you!
- [laughs]
That tickles...
- Look, everybody!
It shakes like
a bowl full of jelly.
- This is fun!
- Stop it, Julien!
That's Santa Claus.
No wonder he throws
coal at you.
- Santa who?
- Santa, Santa,
Are you okay?
I can't believe I'm talking
to Santa Claus.
- I know.
- Wait. Who's Santa?
- What do you mean
who's Santa?
If you're not Santa,
who are you?
My name is...
I can't remember.
[all gasp]
- Look!
He's got another hat on!
- Oh. He must have hit
his head in the crash.
Maybe he's got amnesia.
- Oh, this is bad.
This is--this is bad.
I've ruined Christmas
for everybody.
I've ruined Christmas
for, like, the whole world.
Unless...
- Unless?
- Team huddle!
This could work out great
for everybody.
- Santa's head wound?
No. Not his head wound.
Here's the plan.
We find the sleigh, help Santa
deliver the toys.
Then on the way home,
he drops us off in New York.
It's perfect.
What do you guys think?
- I'm in.
- Okay.
- Let's go find that sleigh.
Oh, they are just adorable.
Alex, go talk to them.
Go, go, go
go go!
- Hello, there,
little reindeer.
You guys up
for a little road trip, hmm?
What do you say?
- Back away!
You don't know
who you're dealing with.
Whoa.
Hey, no need to get psycho.
They're just Santa's little...
- We meet again, South Polers.
- North Polers...
- Oh, okay. You guys know
each other or something?
- It's a cold w*r
that dates back centuries.
You see, Santa used
to be based in the South Pole.
- Oh, this again?
Santa chose North Pole
fair and square!
- Oh, please.
They bribed him with candy canes
and cheap elf labor.
- That's it!
Let's go!
- On my command,
kick 'em in the bells!
Wait, where's Private?
- You're the most beautiful deer
I've ever seen.
- That's the sweetest thing
any penguin has ever said to me.
[pop music]
- ♪ Girl, you're every woman ♪
♪ In the world to me ♪
- Shake it off, Private.
That North Poler might look
like a tall drink of water,
but she'll spit you out
like a cup of bad eggnog.
- Guys, guys, come on.
It's Christmas.
You know, the season
of giving.
So what do you say?
Can you give us a ride?
- Oh, son of the g*n!
We're only allowed
to take orders from Santa.
Why don't you can ask your
South Pole comrades to help.
Oops, I forget.
They can't fly.
[laughter]
Merry Christmas down there,
stuck on the land.
- Merry Christmas.
- Cupid!
- [sighs]
- Great, there goes
our lift home.
- We'll fly it.
- Skipper, you're a penguin.
- And those reindeer have,
like, magical powers.
- Well, that's exactly what
they want you to believe.
Private, give them
a little demo.
The only thing magical
about those North Polers
is that tank full
of sparkly stuff.
Now, go find Big Red, and we'll
get this baby airborne.
- Fat man,
behold the beauty
of a traditional Julianuary
carol honoring...
me.
all:
♪ I like to ♪
- Very nice.
all:
♪ You like to ♪
- All together...
all:
♪ We like to ♪
♪ Move it ♪
♪ I like to move it, move it ♪
- Santa?
- ♪ I'm physically fit,
physically fit ♪
♪ Physically, physically,
physically fit ♪
Incoming!
- All righty, Santa,
time to go, big buddy.
- I don't want to go.
I just want
to shake my booty!
- Santa, buddy,
you got to stop dancing.
- Santa.
- h* h* h*!
I'll never go.
- Oh.
What are we gonna do now?
- Look, it's not going to be
Christmas Eve for much longer,
so either we go without Santa,
or the world goes
without Christmas.
- That's right.
You made this mess,
now we got to clean it up.
Yo, Skipper, sparkle time!
- All right, boys.
Tighten your harnesses
and think happy thoughts.
- Whoo!
- Viva Las Vegas!
[all screaming]
- And everyone wept
tears of joy
for the miracle
that was baby Julien.
You see, fat man, Julianuary
is about the joy of giving...
to me!
Now bring me the presents.
- Merry Julianuary.
- Oh, You remembered.
Next one, please.
Move it along.
- Thank you on behalf
of His Majesty
and Merry Julianuary.
Thank you on behalf
of His Majesty
and Merry Julianuary.
- [gasps]
How did you do that?
- Beats me.
- Can you make one for me?
- Merry Julianuary!
- I want one!
- Me too! Me too!
- Next.
- Where's my presents?
What's going on over there?
- Merry Julianuary!
- Merry Julianuary!
- Merry Julianuary!
- Merry Julianuary!
- No, no, no, no!
Stop!
What's so special
about Julianuary
if everyone gets
to have something?
You...
I took you in as my guest
and now...
you've ruined Julianuary!
From this moment forth, all
your presents are my presents!
- Lady and gentlemen,
we are about to arrive
at our first destination.
Canada is straight ahead.
- Okay, boys,
let's take her down.
Flaps up.
Beaks down.
Stay on target.
Stay on target.
- What kind of landing
was that?
- Any landing you can walk away
from is a good landing.
- This is stupid, Marty.
Can't we just use
the front door?
- Come on.
How hard can it be?
Melman, you're up!
- But I'm claustrophobic.
- Yeah? Well, now you can be
Santa Claustrophobic.
Now dive, fool!
Dive! Dive!
Dive!
- Easy, easy...
Guys, I'm stuck!
- Hang in there, Melman.
I'm coming!
- Melman, I'm right here!
- I'm burning!
- You're not burning!
- Help!
Oh, thank you.
- Uh-oh.
- Don't leave me!
- Alex, you still have
the present.
[both gasp, siren wails]
- Dash away, boys.
Dash away.
- What?
No, wait.
Hang on!
- Aah!
I got you, Melman.
- Way to drop the ball,
you hippy freak.
- Me? Melman's the one
who lost it in the chimney.
- Calm down.
It's a small town.
There's only
a couple more houses...
Let's not freak out.
- Oh, yeah?
Can we freak out now?
- Okay, here's the plan.
We head to the nearest
post office,
and we just
dump the gifts.
- That's a plan.
- I need stamps anyway!
- Skipper, get us
to the nearest post office...
in New York.
[all groaning]
- Well, looks like
our coffee break.
- Oh, my gosh.
Oh, my gosh, oh, my gosh,
oh, my gosh.
You're Santa's helpers.
This is amazing.
You're hairier
than I thought, but amazing!
Okay.
Calm down, Abby.
Breathe.
Namaste. Namaste.
Merry Christmas.
Merry Christmas.
Merry Christmas.
Oh, Merry Christmas.
[gasps] Oh, my gosh,
I almost forgot.
I made you cookies.
[giggling with excitement]
This is the best
Christmas ever.
Don't tell Santa I was up.
Really.
Okay, I'm going to bed now.
I can't go to sleep. There's
no way I can go to sleep.
I just met Santa's helpers.
[grunting]
Ow!
I think I broke
my collarbone.
No, it's okay.
Going to bed now.
Oh, my gosh, oh, my gosh,
oh, my gosh.
New plan--we're not going
to the post office anymore.
We're Santa's hairy helpers,
and we don't rest
until every one
of these gifts
gets delivered.
[all grunting]
- ♪ From Coney Island
to the Sunset Strip ♪
♪ Somebody's gonna
make a happy trip tonight ♪
♪ While the moon is bright ♪
- [coughing]
- ♪ He's gonna have a bag
of presents ♪
- Skipper, progress report?
- Only a cities
left to go.
all: Oh!
- Skipper, look.
- New York.
It's still here.
- It's still beautiful.
- And it's still gonna be here
when we're done.
All right, New York,
let's do this.
- Hyah!
- ♪ On the th day
of Julianuary ♪
♪ My true love sent to me ♪
♪ A great big present for me ♪
Oh, Amelia, did you ever feel
like you're just wasting away?
This is the worst
Julianuary ever.
- Oh, uh, King Julien?
- Hello?
Haven't you heard of knocking?
I could have been naked
in here.
- I'm sorry if I ruined
your Julianuary.
- I don't understand.
I have all the presents.
Why do I feel
so empty inside?
- I don't know,
but back there,
when we were all giving
presents to each other,
it was pretty good.
Hey, why don't you give one
to your girlfriend Amelia
over there?
I bet she'd like it.
- No, she's not my girlfriend.
I don't want to.
Okay, fine!
I'll do it. Just keep
your chubby hands off.
Here, Amelia.
Merry Julianuary.
[gasps]
Look at the smile on Amelia.
Making her feel good
makes me feel good--
kind of warm and tingly
on the inside,
like pin worms.
Come, fat man, we must share
with the world
what I have discovered.
- Whoo!
We did it.
Every single present
delivered and accounted for.
Good-bye, empty bags.
Hello, New--
Oh, no!
There's still a few left
in this one.
- No. No, no more.
I can't take it.
I'll throw it in the river.
It'll be like we never saw them.
- Oh, give me that.
Wait. They're for us.
- What?
- Melman...
- Really?
- Marty...
- Get out of here!
- Alex, and me.
- No way.
Candied yams from Sylvia's.
And they're still hot!
They're still hot!
An inflatable hippo pool?
And chlorine?
[sniffs]
Oh, yeah, that's the stuff.
- Ah!
Dr. Maneesh's neck massager!
- What'd you get, Alex?
- Snow falling down
on my beautiful city.
How did he know?
- That's why Santa's Santa.
The big man's
got some talent.
- Well, we can't leave him
back there
dancing around
with that bump on his head.
We got to go back
and help him.
- Well, the good news is
there's enough sparkly stuff
to get us back to Madagascar.
- Whoo-hoo!
- Is there bad news?
- There's only enough
to get us to Madagascar.
- Put it back, put it back.
- So it's Madagascar or...
home?
- There she is, fellas.
- Maybe next Christmas,
New York.
Skipper, full speed ahead.
- This is the life, huh?
- Tropical paradise.
- To coconuts!
- Na Zdorovye!
- [sighs]
- It says: "To Mort.
"Happy Julianuary.
Love, King Julien."
- A coconut!
Thank you, King Julien!
- Okay, boys.
Let's take her down.
- We just lost
one of our engines.
- I thought you said
there was enough sparkly stuff
- to get us there.
- I did.
- Then what happened?
- I was wrong.
- Red Night Goblin!
The Red Night Goblin's coming!
- [gasps]
[all screaming]
Come on, Private,
think happy thoughts!
Happy thoughts!
- Aah!
[all screaming]
- The Red Night Goblin's
attacking again!
- Brace for impact!
[all grunting]
- Oh, no.
[gasps]
- [groans]
- He's alive.
- Where am I?
The children, the presents.
- He got his memory back.
- Terrible crisis, Santa!
The South Polers
stole sleigh for joyride.
Now Christmas is ruined.
- What?
- That's an outright Christmas
lie with all the trimmings.
- Yeah, Christmas isn't ruined.
We delivered everything.
- It's the truth.
Santa, the South Polers
saved Christmas.
- Cupid, stay out of this.
- I grow tired
of your reindeer games.
We want to be...
bipolar.
- Son of the g*n.
- So you really delivered
all the gifts?
- It's the least we could do.
- And you even found
Liechtenstein?
- Lickity-what?
- Oh, chestnuts!
Those children will be
up any minute now.
- This way, Santa.
- But there's no sparkly stuff
left in the tank.
- I'll use
the reserve tank, then.
- Oh, reserve tank.
- Hey, Santa, wait.
You know, my friends and I...
- Thank you all for everything!
- Santa, wait!
- If that sleigh leaves
and you're not with Santa,
you'll regret it.
- Farewell, Private.
- We'll always have
Madagascar.
- Santa!
- Wait!
- Hold on!
- And, Julien...
You're officially off
the naughty list!
Ha ha ha!
- What?
No!
You can't take me off
the naughty list.
I am the naughty list!
What's the naughty list?
- Merry Christmas!
- No, don't leave!
- Well, looks like Santa's
back in business.
- And we're back in Madagascar.
- And you know what?
We're gonna have the best
Christmas ever, right here.
- This'll get me back
on the naughty list...
Coconutball fight!
- All right, let's give
these babies a spin.
- I can't stop.
I can't stop!
- Rockefeller Center
ain't got nothing on this!
- Well, we may not have gotten
home for Christmas,
but we got snow.
- Um, I wouldn't do that
if I were you.
- Oh! It's not snow!
It's not snow!
- See, Marty?
It's not what you get.
It's what you give.
- Oh, give it a rest.
I'm so naughty.
Mort, you're next.
- Alex?
You okay?
- [groans]
Who's Alex?
[all groan]
- Merry Christmas
and Happy Julianuary everybody!
[rock music]
♪ ♪
- ♪ Jingle bells, jingle bells,
jingle all the way ♪
- h* h* h*!
Merry Madagascar!
- Madagascar!
This is King Julien
with a special Christmas ditty.
I wrote it myself.
♪ You better watch out ♪
♪ Better not cry ♪
♪ Better not pout,
I'm telling you why ♪
♪ Santa Claus is coming
to Madagascar ♪
There he is!
Shake it, fat man!
♪ He's making a list ♪
♪ And checking it twice ♪
♪ He's gonna find out
who's naughty and nice ♪
♪ Santa Claus is coming
to Madagascar ♪
Yes, he's coming!
Get ready!
♪ He sees
when you are sleeping ♪
That's a little creepy.
♪ He knows when you're awake ♪
He's in your room.
♪ He knows
if you've been bad or good ♪
♪ So be bad,
for goodness' sake ♪
Coconutball fight!
♪ You better watch out ♪
♪ Better not cry ♪
♪ Better not pout,
I'm telling you why ♪
♪ Santa Claus is coming
to Madagascar ♪
- Oh!
Santa time!
- ♪ Here he is, here he is,
here he is, go, Santa ♪
♪ Go, Santa, go, Santa,
go, Santa ♪
♪ Toys, toys, toys, toys ♪
♪ Wood planes, wood dolls,
wood ba*ls, wood toys ♪
♪ Wood bats, wood hats ♪
What?
Everything's made out of wood.
What you say to me?
- ♪ Santa Claus is coming ♪
- ♪ To Madagascar ♪
[laughing]
Yes. Yes.
This the holidays, y'all.
Let's get some hands
up in here, yes.
Where are the flying reindeer?
♪ Go, Dasher,
go, Dancer ♪
♪ Go, Prancer,
go, Vixen ♪
♪ Go, Comet,
go, Cupid ♪
♪ Go, Donner,
go, Blitzen ♪
[laughs] What's this dance
I just invented?
It will blow your eyes
out of the back of your mind.
Shake it, shake it,
shake it like a snow globe.
Shake it, shake it,
shake it like a snow globe.
♪ Cold in the globe,
cold in the globe ♪
♪ Cold in the globe,
cold in the globe ♪
Original King Julien!
Peace out.
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Happy Holidays from Madagascar Short Stories (2005)
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