01x01 - The DVD

[bunniefuu]

Oh, no! It seems I can't put them on.

I'm afraid we can't go to the parent's evening.

Ready to go.

Ah.

Hi. I'm here to sit on the baby.

What?

Well, duh! I'm the babysitter!

Richard, where did you find that guy?

On the Internet...

Where am I going to find a babysitter at this time?

Ahem!

I can't believe I'm going to say this.

I guess you guys are old enough to babysit?

Us?

Yes, you. But promise you'll be responsible.

I promise to be the most responsible kid

and will handle my responsibilities

in the most responsible way.

Yeah, responsible!

You have no idea what responsible means, do you?

Nah.

It means acting like a grownup.

And most of all, it means taking care of your little sister.

What?!

Can I trust you guys to do that?

Come on, Mom. We were born reprehensible.

Responsible.

Yeah, that's what I meant.

Richard, put your pants on. We're off.

No!

Richard. Pants... on.

No!

Nooo! I don't wanna go to school!

We have to go! It's a parents evening,

and we are the parents!

I'm putting a lot of trust in you kids.

Don't worry, Mom. You won't be disappointed.

So how do you feel, Darwin?

Pretty responsible. And you?

I feel like a new man... a responsible man.

I can't believe this. I'm going upstairs.

STAIRS! AAAHHH!

Oww! What are you doing?

Seventy-nine percent of stair accidents happen on the stairs.

What does that even mean?

It means you're safer sitting here.

Okay.

Welcome to Daisy the Donkey show! We'll be right back after these messages.

When you're deciding where to go for a hamburger-

Aah! Commercials! They'll corrupt your mind!

Bad commercials! Bad commercials!

Are you completely out of your mind?
Bad commercials! Bad commercials!

Are you completely out of your mind?

There's...too...much...v*olence...on...TV...anyway.

And you chose to demonstrate that by smashing the TV in front of me?

It was the responsible thing to do.

Even though you set it on fire.

It's not on fire.

Oh, it is on fire...

FIRE!

Stop! Don't throw water on an electrical-

-fire...

You should always use a fire extinguisher or if unavailable, baking soda.

But most importantly call an adult or the emergency services.

Yeah of course, but ours was a responsible demonstration of what not to do in case of an electrical fire.

How could Mom put you in charge?

What is wrong with you?!

Papercuts.

Ridiculous, and look at the mess you're making!

It's a small price to pay for your safety.

You're too young to understand.

Excuse me, but who makes your breakfast every day?

You, of course.

And who helps you with your homework?

You.

So I should be in charge.

But who did Mom put in charge?

You...

So who has to do what we say?

Me.

Uhh, I feel like I'm in one of those dreams.

The ones where you go to school naked.

Oh come on Richard, stop being so dramatic.

We're the parents now, there's nothing she can do to you.

You get an F minus in parenting! Next!

Oh, the Wattersons.

Are you aware that your husband isn't wearing any pants?

Aw, look at that grumpy little face.

I know what will cheer her up. How about a walk in the park?

Hmm, yeah I guess that could be okay.

Come on, it's for your own safety.

Oh, isn't she lovely? How old is she then?

She's four now.

Well now, you want a biscuit? Huh?

You won't get a taste of this

you won't ever get a taste of this that's right cause it's mine.

Whoo I was just teasin' ya, you want a little bit of-

Oh, she bit me!

You know what this means?

She must be hungry!

It's time for num-nums!

We have a mackerel sandwich, a potato, and a little something for dessert.

Are you kidding me?

Of course!

That food is way too chunky for a little baby like her, she could choke.

I know what to do.

Bon appetit!

Alright, you asked for this.

Okay, bath time.

Ah, just right.

Isn't water dangerous?

How do you expect me to wash myself without water?

Haven't you heard of dry cleaning?

Fine, get out of here!

They grow up so fast.

Shhh!

Is that water I hear?

No! I just... flushed?

Oh, speaking of which we're gonna need you to wear this.

WHAT!?!

We don't want you to have any accidents.

Very responsible thinking, Gumball.

Hm, thanks.

Now be a big girl and...

There's no way I'm wearing a diaper!

Get back here!

Come back Anais!

You can run but you can't hide!

Run! Hide!

Put it on!

Never!

Open this door young lady!

Don't make me tell Mom that you've been a bad baby!

Aah! She's not in there, she ran out the window!

Oh, what's mom gonna think? We're in so much trouble!

You g*ons really walked into that one!

Anais, let us in.

Babysit yourself on the roof until Mom and Dad come back.

Anais! Anais!

Oh look, a book, I hope I don't give myself a papercut.

Anais!

Oh no, no diaper.

I surely hope I don't have an accident, on your bed!

Anais!

Anais!!

And you know what I'm gonna have now?

A nice relaxing bath, with real water!

Well, it could've been worse.

Are you kidding me?

Look at the bill, how do you set fire to a swimming pool?

I know, pretty good huh?

...that you're always there to keep an eye on them?

Do something!

Get on the bed and stay where you are.

We'll figure out a way to rescue you.

Don't worry! I'll smash the door in- Ah!

You wouldn't know where the keys are by any chance, would you?

Somewhere safe.

Ah, what are we gonna do?

Hey, how's it going?

I don't know, how do you think it's going?

Okay, take a deep breath.

Woohoo!

Good job everyone!

Hey don't worry, we can use this diaper as a parachute and float safely down to-

They're back!

Oh no.

See honey? I told you there was nothing to worry about.

Hi.

Thank heavens you're safe!

So you're not angry at us for trashing the house?

Oh no.

Angry doesn't BEGIN TO COVER IT!!

How do you burn a TV underwater?

WHO IS RESPONSIBLE FOR THIS!?

Mom, it's my...

No, I've got this.

No, Gumball, it was me that left the faucet running!

Please sis, let your brother be "responsible" for once in his life.

Thanks, Gumball.

Mom...

It was Darwin.

WHAT!? It was her that flooded the place!

I thought you were going to take the rap!

Anyway, it was clearly Mom's fault.

She was the one who left Gumball in charge.

Well it, it's Dad's fault for not finding a proper babysitter!

Well, um...

None of this would've happened if it wasn't for you!

Um, who are you blaming here?

The internet?

Yeah, that's good enough.

Gumball, don't forget to take that DVD back today or we'll get a fine.

Pffftt... Can't you do it?

You're the one with the car.

I wasn't the one who watched Alligators on a Train seventy-two times.

Ha! But, technically, you rented it with your money.

The money I have to go and earn to feed you kids.

The kids you decided to have.

Yep! No problem, Mom! I'll take it back!

Oh, very kind of you, honey.

And don't forget to put on some pants. Bye-bye!

Darwin, have you seen that DVD anywhere I--

Darwin! What are you doing?

I'm using the pizza cutter.

That's not the pizza cutter, that's the DVD!

Aw, give me that!

Oh man, you really have to be careful with these things.

The slightest scratch and they're ruined...forever.

Uh, Gumball...?

Hup, hup, hup!

I am fed up with your carelessness, Darwin.

This disk utilizes laser technology.

You have treat it with respect.

You're using the wrong side of the scrubby sponge.

No! No! What are we gonna do?!

Face the consequences of our actions and tell Mom?

Don't be silly. I've got a much better idea.

There. You can make anything with cardboard and no one will notice the difference.

Really? It looks kind of obvious.

Eh, you say that, but I lost my trousers three weeks ago, and still, no one's noticed.

Everyone's noticed that walk, though.

Really?

You look like you went to the bathroom in a spacesuit.

Dude, it's a letter from Laser Video!

Ah, so what? Put it with the others.

No, this one's red! It means urgent!

Red envelope or red writing?

Red writing on red envelope. It's really hard to read actually.

It says we have to pay twenty-five dollars for the DVD!

Aaah! What are we gonna do?!

Face the consequences of our actions and tell Mom?

No, no, no, no, no. Just give me a little time to think.

It took you two days to think of this?

Less complaining, more begging.

How much have we got anyway?

Like, three dollars?

Great! Twenty-two more and we can pay for the DVD.

Now pinch me, we get more when it looks like I'm crying.

The reason you guys are on the streets is to pay a DVD fine?

Yeah, I know, it's crazy, right?

People don't understand how hard our life is.

Hey!

Yay!

But...huh...

That guy stole our cash!

Well, Darwin, sometimes in life

you have to realize that there are less fortunate people than ourselves.

He needs that money more than we do.

WOOHOO! I WON!

I spent your money on a scratch card, and now I'm a millionaire!

That's great! So, can we have our four dollars back?

Oh...uh...sorry, guys. I don't have anything in change.

You have new messages.

Hi, Laser Video here...
Hello, it's Laser Video...

You need to bring back...

You need...to bring...the film...back to the shop.

Ha ha, I knew you were trying to skip my messages!

Gumball, I think we need to get a job.

- Mmm, can you cook?
- No.

- Can you drive?
- No.

Can you speak Chinese?

Can you provide inspirational leadership to a core team of people

covering both national/international markets?

Mmm, no.

Wait! How about this one? "Looking for a person with no skills or training

to serve as a scientific subject for the cosmetics industry."

What does that mean?

It means they'll put make-up on us and see if it looks nice.

Kind of like modeling?

Yeah.

I'd always thought I make a good model.

What makes you think that?

High cheekbones.

There are bones in there?

Oh ha, there are.

Are you boys ?

Uhh...
does it count that I've been both and ?

I suppose so.
Now step into the make-up booth.

Please relax.
Look at the red dot, and pout.

Hey, that's not bad. Looking good.

What happened to you?!

I think I'm allergic.

How come you look so good?

I don't know. Maybe it's something to do with my perfect skin.

I think I'm gonna get this off.

What happened? Why am I looking at the floor?

Okay boys. How did the test go ?

I can't believe she only gave us five bucks.

It costs more than that to get home on the bus.

Huh?

Oh, man! More letters from Laser Video!

Oh, we're in so much trouble!

We have to hide these before Mom gets home!

Yes?

Honey, are you in trouble?

Because my mother senses are tingling. I can smell trouble.

Trouble? No, we're fine. Absolutely Fine.

No trouble here, bye.

Are you lying?

No, of course not.

Right, you're lying. I'm coming home now.

Mom's on her way home.

Now.

What should we do?!

Should we tell the truth and face the consequences of our actions?!

What is it with you with trying to be honest all the time?!

No, we need to copy Alligators on a Train.

I know. I'm gonna download it.

Gumball! You wouldn't steal a car, you wouldn't steal a woman's purse,

you wouldn't steal a cell phone!

PIRACY IS STEALING!

I know. I'm... I'm so sorry.

Anyway, I got a better idea.

Is it stupid, desperate and very unlikely to get us out of this mess?

- Yes.
- Is it humiliating?

- If we get it wrong.
- Are we likely to get it wrong?

- Possibly.
- In the time it's taking me to ask these questions,

could you have just told me what it is?

- Technically.
- Can we get on with it then?

Yeah, we better.

I knew it. You are in so much TROUBLE!

We need to get to Laser Video before Mom kicks our butt!

What did you do this time?!

STOP! RIGHT! THERE!

QUICK!

WHERE DO YOU THINK YOU'RE GOING?!

DON'T YOU DARE RUN AWAY FROM YOUR MOTHER!

Whoa !

Mom, are you okay?

What was that?

YOU'RE IN SO MUCH TROUBLE!

QUICK!

Gumball, we have to help Mom!

I don't know. Maybe she'll be alright.

GUMBALL! There's a monstrous creature attacking our mother!

We have to face the consequences of our actions and HELP HER OUT!

Yes. I'm... I'm sorry. You're right.

Wait a minute. Why has it gone quiet?

STOP RIGHT NOW!

Stop the letters! Stop the letters!

Huh. The Wattersons, it's about time you showed up.

I assume you have my money?

Better than that, Larry, we got the DVD.

I hope you don't mind if I make sure it's real.

Last time, it was a piece of cardboard.

Huh. Go for it.

Alligators on a Train.

OH, NO! This alligator is on this train!

Thank goodness we got all the alligators off this train.

Thank you so much for saving us from all the alligators on this train.

Doo-doo-doo. Alligators off this train.

Alligators off this train.

Alligators on a Train!

This had better be a joke.

Aw, man. What gave it away?

Dude, it's five seconds long and every name in the credits is one of you two.

I told you we should've put some other people on the credits.

What, and let them have all the glory?

Well, there's no way I can accept this.

You need to give me the real DVD, NOW!

We can't! We used it to cut a pizza,

and then we scratched it with the wrong side of the scrubby sponge,

and then we threw it in the waste disposal! Please don't tell our mom!

I already know.

How much is the DVD, Larry?

Twenty-five dollars.

WHAT?! You made me leave work and chase you through the neighborhood on a dog

for twenty-five dollars?!

But... but we were scared to tell you.

Aw silly, there's nothing you can do that will ever stop me loving you.

Come here.

Now, let me pay for that.

See Darwin, you should always tell the truth.

and face the consequences of your actions.

Ow!

Come on, let's go home, you little troublemakers.

Uh, just a minute, there's also the lateness fee.

Oh, yes of course. How much is it please?

Let me see. Three months and three days late.

That will be seven-hundred dollars.

You see boys, sometimes in life you really have to face the consequences of your actions.

And sometimes you just RUN!

Hey, hey, HEY!