Wedding Pact, The (2014)

[bunniefuu]

- It's hot as hell

it's a cold w*r

tainted words

I left so pure

do I walk away

or let you in,

let you in

if I could give you

advice

just give up

'cause you don't want me

to mess you up

but you won't believe

I'm not the one

now saying

that you're lovesick

I don't have the cure

it hurts so good

to pick your poison

when you're in pain,

I enjoy it

your hell is my paradise

paradise

when the sun goes down,

it's time to play

and you know

that I won't go away

your hell is my paradise

so pick your poison tonight

- And last,

I would just like to say

good luck in this new

chapter of our lives.

Excuse the cliche,

but they say that time flies

when you're having fun.

And I don't know

about you guys,

but I have had

the best time of my life here

at Madison college.

Now...

Point me to the keg.

- Look in the mirror,

mascara smeared

sipping belvedere

LA LA like a superstar

stunner shades,

oh, it's so cliche

she's no grenade

- What a d*uche.

- Bring it in here, girls.

- Why do I get the feeling

we'll be calling Bob

senator one day?

In 20 years, that guy's

gonna be the president.

- Everybody's having

a good time.

I'm already having a good time.

- Dude.

- Hey!

Don't start with me.

- Look, the first semester,

she was totally single,

and you were actually

the first person to meet her.

- Yeah, I know.

I know I blew it, okay?

I mean, usually I got

pretty good game.

But, you know,

I get around Elizabeth

and I get all loopy.

- Yeah, well...

Speaking of game,

how'd the breakup go with Rosie?

- What do you mean,

how'd it go?

She kicked me in the nuts.

- Ooh. Were you wearing?

- Oh, yeah.

- Yeah.

You had to know that was coming.

- Oh, yeah.

- Oh, here she comes.

- Hi, guys.

- Hey!

- Hi.

- Hey.

- What are you guys

talking about?

- Baseball and...

- Oh.

Guy stuff?

- Yeah.

- So macho.

- Yeah.

- Yeah, let me get...

who wants a beer?

- Yeah, I'll have...

- beer? Two beers, three beers?

- I'm okay.

Thank you.

So...

Tomorrow's graduation.

It's crazy, right?

- I know, right?

It's like four years

went by like that.

- Yeah.

You should fly to visit me

in San Diego.

- Mm...

Yeah, I don't know.

- You don't... you don't know

if you wanna come see me?

- No, no, it's not...

it's not what you think.

It's... You know.

What I told you.

- Oh, the claustrophobia

stuff.

- Yes, I...

- I kinda thought you were

kidding about that.

- No. I don't kid

about that.

I thought it was just elevators

and things like that.

- Yeah, it is, but then

it kicks in pretty good

The whole fear of plunging

to a fiery, screaming death

tends to amplify it a bit.

- Right.

- We can talk about

something else.

- Sure. But I do want you

to come visit me.

- Okay.

- Lizzie!

- Um, hold on one second.

I guess maybe one regret

that I have is that,

you know, with all the stupid

boyfriends and girlfriends

that we both had

that you and I never

gave it a shot.

Let's make a deal, Mitch.

In ten years, if we haven't

married other people,

we marry each other.

What do you say?

- Lizzie!

We're gonna leave

without you.

- Okay. Hold on.

What do you say?

- Sure!

- I love you so much,

Mitch.

- I love you too.

- Okay. I'll see you soon.

- Okay.

- Bye.

- Bye.

- Huh? So?

How'd it go?

- To be honest,

I think I just got engaged.

Now listen,

I know what you're all thinking.

Yeah, right, he's gonna

wait ten years to marry her.

I will admit,

I did think about it.

For about a month.

Now, as you can see,

when I go on the first date,

I got it down pretty good.

I mean,

look at the way

they laugh at my jokes.

You can't fake that.

Although with women,

you never really can tell.

But first date...

I'm king.

When we get a little deeper

in the relationship...

- Mitch, this is the best

birthday dinner ever.

You'd better be careful,

mister.

I might just use

the "I" word tonight.

- That's when things

go kablooey.

It's your birthday?

- Don't ever call me again.

- For the last time,

my name is Eleanor,

not Elizabeth, jerk!

- Well, ten years later,

I'm still single.

And I heard that Elizabeth

already got married,

so I guess it's just not

meant to be.

- Okay.

This is from me.

- Thank you, Karen.

- Happy Birthday, Mitch.

- Thank you.

Oh, my gosh.

Oh, come on.

Look at that.

- Nice watch.

What'd that run you?

- Easy!

Thank you, Karen.

You're welcome.

- Seriously, I, uh,

I feel truly blessed

to have friends like you.

Are these wonderful gifts

are just too much, so...

- You're welcome!

- Thank you.

Most of you.

- Is this a party, or what?

- Look at you!

You made it!

- Hey, dude, I took the last

ferry from montauk,

got here in no time.

- And yet, you never visit.

- Nice hat.

- Thank you very much.

This is my good friend

Dave breem

from college, everybody.

- This a birthday party

or a funeral?

Come on!

- Funeral.

- Hey, hey, hey, easy.

Now, who scored

this month's bonus

and is picking up

tonight's check, huh?

- To Mitch.

To Mitch.

- Thank you very much.

- Salud.

- Waitress!

Another round.

Cheap stuff?

- Good night, ladies!

- Hey, guys, it's last call.

Would you like anything else

before I close out your tab?

- No, I think

just the check, thanks.

- Uh, um...

I would like to buy

me and my buddy

two shots of whiskey.

Why don't you, uh...

Keep the change?

Huh?

- You always know

the right thing to do, man.

- That is because I'm the ying

to your Yang.

Oh!

- What?

Oh, my... dude.

- Happy Birthday.

- Come on!

- Mm-hmm.

- You kept this?

- Ten years, man.

How you holding up?

- Eh.

Man, if she only waited,

we would have been great

together.

- Yeah, I know.

- Eh. Stupid to think

a girl like her

can go ten years

and not find somebody.

I mean, it's not like

I didn't try.

I mean, I scoured

the Internet, you know?

Facebook, Twitter...

nothing.

This woman's off the grid.

Thank you.

- Well, what if I told you...

- oh, my God,

who ordered the cabo?

Seriously,

I said bottom shelf, guys!

You know what?

I bet you it was damn Carl.

- Dude, would you stop?

In two seconds,

you're not even

gonna care about that.

- Yeah, that I'd like.

- Then this you'll love.

You sitting down?

- Yeah, Dave.

I'm sitting down.

- Okay, okay.

She never got married.

- No way.

- Yes, way!

- No, no, no, 'cause I read

in the alumni mag...

are you messing with me?

- I'm not messing with you.

- Don't mess with me.

- I'm not messing with you.

In fact, I'm trying to help you.

I read the same thing too.

But I called the alumni office.

She never got married.

This is her last known

address in San Diego.

- San Diego.

Happy Birthday!

It's meant to be, man!

- This might be meant to be.

- This is really meant to be.

- This might be meant to be.

- I'll drink to that.

- Mmm!

- Oh, my God.

Ugh...

- Give me my change!

Dude, there's such better

Mexican in this town.

Why do you keep going

to this dump?

- 'Cause it's got...

it's fiesta hour.

We got, you know,

free drinks.

- Uhh... But it's... ugh.

So what are you gonna do?

- Be honest?

Probably same thing

I've always done... nothing.

- Can I be honest?

That's stupid, man.

Come on... go after the girl!

- She lives a long way away,

and I am terrified of flying.

- Then drive.

- What about my job?

- You hate your job.

- What about my fish?

- I'll feed your fish.

- What about my plants?

- I'll water 'em.

- What if she

doesn't love me back?

- Well, what if she

love me back?

- All right.

You're an animal.

- Come on, man.

What if she does?

You'll never know unless

you get in this car

and go find out.

Yo, yo!

Thanks for the c*ck!

- Carl?

- Yeah.

- d*uche.

- d*uche.

- We're heading to val's.

You and your buddy wanna come?

- Yeah, Mitch, come on.

Come for a night cap.

- Yeah, Mitch.

Come!

- I'm gonna have to pass.

- What, do you got something

better to do?

- Yes, I do.

I'm going to San Diego.

Yeah! All right!

I'll come.

- Riding a narrow road

under skies so blue

hiding that I am

I'm searching for you

along the passersby

I keep looking in vain

day after day I ride

towards the setting sun

on the road traveled less

- Okay, so driving

across country

and just showing up

at her place with no warning?

Some people

might think it's crazy.

Or creepy.

But I think it's romantic.

toing and froing

gotta get 'em now,

gotta get your goal

gotta figure out what the hell

you know on your own

time to push the envelope,

runnin' out of rope

slipping down the slope,

looking for answers

I can't seem to find

- Bam.

Uh!

hey

- hey

I'm wastin' my time

get some more of the story

into the grind

gotta get 'em now,

gotta get your goal

gotta figure out...

- Wow, you're a long way

away from home.

Hey, there.

- Uh, hi.

- Where ya headed?

- Uh, San Diego.

- You look exhausted.

How long you been driving?

- Sheesh.

About 11 hours.

- What's your name,

patriot?

- Mitch.

- Hey, Mitch.

Nice to meet ya.

I'm Laura.

- Hi.

- You know, I run

a bed and breakfast

just up the road.

- Oh, well, uh...

That's okay.

- Come on.

I didn't meant to startle ya.

But you just look too cute

not to meet.

I got a nice bed

and a hot shower.

I was even gonna cook.

You like spicy?

Yeah, I don't know.

Mmm. Oh, my gosh.

That was fantastic.

Thank you.

- That's sweet.

There's more if you like.

- After 11 hours of driving

and three glasses of wine

and a meal like that...

Just point me to bed.

I am done.

- Mmm. Bed.

That sounds real nice.

Oh...

You really are cute.

Don't move.

- Wh...

- hello.

Oh, hey, Rudy.

It's my brother.

It'll just be a sec.

- Okay.

- Really?

That's kinda last minute.

But I have a guest here.

All right,

I'll see ya in a bit.

My brother and his friends

get together once a week

and they lost

their usual place, so...

He asked if he could

come here.

But I said he had to be

real quiet.

Um...

I'll just...

Probably...

- Okay.

Who is she,

and what's her name?

- What do you mean?

Uh...

Elizabeth.

I haven't seen her

since college,

and we made this pact

back then

that if we weren't married

in ten years,

we were gonna marry

each other.

So here it is ten years

later,

and, uh...

I'm gonna track her down.

- You made the old friend

college

ten-year pact?

- Sounds kinda dumb

when you say it like that.

- No, it is kinda dumb.

- Maybe, but...

I have to try.

- Are you sure?

- If I had a nickel

for every time a beautiful

woman like yourself

tried to take me to bed,

including right now...

- You'd have a nickel?

- Maybe a dime.

- Well, she's lucky

to have you,

even if she doesn't know it.

- Thank you.

- I would love to find

some guy

to take me away

from this life.

- You? I'm sure you have

plenty of offers.

- I seem to be attracted

to losers.

- Wait a minute.

Did she just call me a loser?

I haven't felt that awkward

since my first day of college.

- Here we go.

- Whoop! Yeah.

- College!

- All right!

Got in.

- Mitch.

- Oh.

I'm Dave.

- Hey.

Cool!

- Okay, all right.

This'll work.

Now that that's settled,

I'm gonna go take a whiz.

College!

- College.

O-ma-o-ma-my-ma...

O-ma-o-ma-my-ma...

- What the f...

Aah! Ohh!

Ohh!

Mitch?

A-are you all right?

- I'm fine.

Thank you.

- I thought I heard

a crash in there.

- Uh...

I just dropped

some change on the table.

I'm good.

- Honey, can you open

the door, please?

- Ohh...

Coming.

Ohh... Ooh.

See? All good.

- Actually,

I'm glad you're awake.

- Oh, really?

- My brother and his friends

are outside,

and he'd like to meet you.

- Your brother what?

- He'd like to meet you.

- Do you think

that's a good idea?

I mean, he seems...

Pretty busy with the boys

and all.

- Laura! Get your sorry butt

out here with your friend now.

- Rudy, don't push me!

Mitch is getting dressed

and will be out in a minute!

Sorry.

- That's okay.

- If you could...

If you could just get dressed

and come out with me,

it would be really great.

- I'll be out in a sec.

- Okay.

I'm dead!

- I knew about you

as soon as I met you.

- As did I you, sir.

- Sir.

- Sir?

Well, look out, everybody.

Here comes sir Rudy!

- Well, I gotta get going.

Got a long drive ahead of me.

- Hey, listen, we are gonna

be out in Zuma

in the next couple weeks.

If you need any help,

you call.

Deal?

- Deal.

- Ah!

- ah!

And thanks for

that all-American burger.

- You're welcome.

- I know he can be

an obnoxious jerk.

But he's my brother.

- It's family.

Hey, Laura,

thank you for everything.

And take care of yourself.

- You too, darling.

Now, go find Elizabeth.

Have your friend call me.

- Will do.

- So hot,

look at that body

ooh, girl

I'm gonna do

something naughty

Strawberries and cream.

If you know this...

Listen, babe, wait.

Yello?

- Hey, man.

- Oh, hey, man!

Where are you?

- Texas.

- Texas?

Only two things in Texas...

and you're not a steer.

- How's it going?

You got a number for me?

- Sorry, but you're really...

Not gonna like this.

- Aw, dude,

after the night I had,

it's not even gonna matter.

Just sh**t.

Yeah, she doesn't

live in, um, San Diego.

She lives in Hawaii.

- Hawaii?

- Yeah, dude, Hawaii.

But look, you can do this.

- How am I gonna get

to Hawaii?

Is there a boat?

- No, dude.

Not unless you want to

spend $5,000.

But you can take a flight.

What the...

- I'll tell you what.

I'll tell you what.

I will book you... come here.

I'll book you a ticket.

Right there.

Perfect, baby, just...

- all right, look,

just book it.

And I got the number of

a smoking hot woman

I'll give you, okay?

- Oh, really?

One sec.

How hot?

- Just book the ticket.

- All right, okay.

Guess what.

All right, one second.

Ooh... Pow!

All right, mm-hmm.

You owe me $600.

- Fine.

- Call you back.

I'm in the middle of something.

Safe flight.

Ooh! Hit me one time.

- We got you in 21b.

It's a middle seat.

Apologize.

That's all we have.

Have a good flight.

Mahalo.

- Good afternoon,

ladies and gentlemen.

Please make sure you are

with your bags at all times.

Do not leave bags

unattended.

- You okay?

'Cause you don't look well.

- I-I don't like flying.

- Oh, God, me neither.

It's just gross.

Hey, look, uh...

I was gonna pound half of this

before the flight.

No need to waste it.

You wanna share?

- How'd you get that past

security?

- I lifted it off

a duty-free.

- Welcome to the amarillo

international airport.

For your safety,

please obey the following

airport guidelines.

- Drink deeply.

Yeah.

- Oh, my goodness.

Come to daddy.

Mm.

Mm-hmm, mm-hmm, mm-hmm.

Mm! Mm!

- Oh, yeah, baby.

- Thank you.

- Mm-hmm.

You're welcome.

- Good afternoon,

ladies and gentlemen.

We are now boarding

aloha flight 3345

to Honolulu.

- Um... That's me.

Is that you?

- Uh, that's me.

- Yah, that's us.

That's good.

That's us.

All right.

All right.

I'll, uh... See you on the plane.

All righty.

Keep that.

It's for you.

- Boarding group 4.

Only those passengers

with a 4 on their boarding pass

should come to the gate.

- Ah! We're going down!

I'm so sorry.

It's my phone.

I'm sorry.

It's Dave.

Hello.

- Dude, oh, good, I got you.

Where are you?

- I'm boarding right now.

- No! Get off.

I was wrong.

Elizabeth

is not in Hawaii.

She's.

- Yeah.

- Your pilot's drunk.

- Don't get on the plane.

- Where am I going?

- She's in Pasadena.

- Pasadena?

- You're welcome.

- Morning.

- Morning, honey.

- Anything in there

that I need to know?

- Once again, not unless

you like politics.

- Mm, my favorite.

I don't know how you read that

day after day.

Doesn't it drive you nuts?

- If you don't read

about what's going on

in this country, Elizabeth,

how can you expect to be

an educated voter?

- Vote?

What's that?

Mom, I'm kidding.

God.

- I was thinking

of going over

and taking in a movie today.

Care to join me?

- I would love to,

but I have an appointment

with Mrs. Stanton and her kids.

- The family you sponsor?

- Yeah. They're part of

my training.

Three weeks, and then

I'm a full-time social worker.

And I have to go

get ready for work.

What time did they say

buddy was gonna be ready?

- 5:00.

- Thank you.

- Turn on rush in the car.

- She must be unlisted,

'cause I got nothing.

- No, I know, I tried...

I tried everybody.

What would you do...

did you try Becky?

Maybe you should give

her a call.

- Oh, Becky?

- Hey.

- That chick scares me.

- Ah...

Yeah, try Becky and then

get back to me, all right?

- I'll text her.

- Okay.

Take care, buddy.

- Peace!

- God!

- Don't freak out.

- Whoa... whoa, whoa,

whoa, whoa.

- What the hell

you doing with my girl?

- I wasn't doing anything!

- Shut up!

- J-just don't cut me.

- I said shut up.

- Damn it, Eddie,

just leave me alone.

- So, uh... How long

this been going on?

- There's nothing going on.

- He gives me

everything you don't.

- What?

- What?

- You just don't love me!

- So I don't love you, huh?

Then what's this then?

- What the hell am I

supposed to do with that?

- Fine.

Choke on it.

- Hey!

Is that how you want her

to remember the big question?

Listen,

do you know how long

some people wait

their whole lives

to be with the one person

they love,

and you two morons

have found each other,

and you're wasting

precious time

acting like children.

Now, she obviously loves you

if she's jumping in a car

with a complete stranger...

Right?

- Right.

- Looking to get your attention.

Now, he obviously loves you

if he's willing to go

to prison for life over you.

- Well, it'd probably be

10 to 12 for good behavior.

- The point is the two of you

are right here right now,

and you know what you want.

- I'm so sorry, baby.

I just get worried

you're gonna leave me.

- I love you so much,

and I want you to be

my one and only.

- Oh, Eddie, I just want you

so bad right now.

- Yeah?

- Yeah.

- Why don't you hop back here

and give me some

of that sweet-smelling sugar.

- I'm, uh...

I'm gonna step out.

- Daddy's waiting

for you, baby.

- New car, caviar

living like a superstar

she's no hater,

just a taker

bona fide love faker

just a hard heart breaker

looking for a money-maker

hey

- I wouldn't know,

but I imagine

the sex right after a marriage

proposal's pretty good.

I just hope it's quick too.

And not messy.

- Round,

get that dirty money

round,

you'll never take it from me

give her bling,

diamond rings

give her gold by the pound

money money money money

makes the girls go round

- Four-letter word...

For a female ending in "unt. "

Ha.

Aunt.

A-u-n-t.

Carter residence.

- Mrs. Carter.

Yes.

- H-hello?

H...

hello?

Damn it.

Yes?

- Mrs. Carter...

- whatever you're selling,

I'm not buying.

But thank you for trying.

- You on the cell phone,

pull over now!

Welcome to California.

- Hello.

- Hi, Mrs. Carter.

Please don't hang up.

- Who is this?

Is this acorn?

- No. My name's Mitch Becker.

I'm an old college friend

of Elizabeth's.

I was trying

to get in touch with her.

- Uh-huh.

Pecker.

- No. Becker, with a "b. "

- Oh.

Oh, Mitch!

Mitch!

Oh, I'm so sorry.

- I was trying to get

in touch with Elizabeth.

I'm in town.

I'd like to see her.

- Oh, she'll be so excited

to hear from you.

Oh, my goodness.

Listen, do you have

one of those g. S.P. Thingies

in your car?

If you do, you could meet her

at the dog groomer.

She's picking up her dog

at 5:00.

- That'd be great.

Um...

- Well, let me get you

the address then.

Oh, she'll be so surprised

to see you!

- Hi, Lizzie.

- Hey, Sally.

Is buddy ready?

- You betcha.

I'll go get him.

Thanks.

Knock it off!

Shut up!

Hey, I said quiet!

Go see mommy.

There she is!

- How are you?

How do you feel, boy?

- He did great, as always.

- Oh, thanks.

You wanna go

on a run later?

Okay!

- How's the training going?

- Good. I'm almost done.

Sounds crazy back there.

How are you?

- Uh, honestly,

I'm thinking cats.

Buddy, no!

- Ohh!

God!

- Oh, my gosh!

Buddy, stay!

Bad dog!

Sir, are you okay?

Oh, my God, I'm so sorry.

Are you all right?

Oh, my God, I feel so bad.

- Elizabeth.

- Mitch?

Back soon, mom.

Welcome home, buddy.

Pink toenail Polish.

I got beaten up.

- I'm speechless!

- No.

It's really you.

- It's really me.

- You look great.

- I was just about to say

the same thing about you.

- So what are you doing here?

You look like you need

to tell me something.

Are you sick?

You're not sick, are you?

- No. No, no.

Uh...

What about you?

Last I heard,

you were married.

- Hmm. Uh, no, not yet.

I was going to,

and that didn't happen.

It wasn't, um...

Really my choice.

What about you?

- Me.

- Mm-hmm.

Married?

- I would have thought

you'd be married by now.

- Funny you should say that.

- Why?

- It's...

It's funny because I...

I, um...

Have to go to the bathroom,

and I will be right back.

- Okay.

- Excuse me.

Oh, come on, Mitch.

Get it together, man!

You've been waiting on this.

It's gonna be fine.

It's gonna be good.

You got this.

You got this.

Really. 'Cause now you're

talking to your p*nis.

That's fantastic.

Great.

Elizabeth...

We made a promise

to each other

ten years ago.

I'm here

to honor that promise.

I'm here to say to you,

"will you marry me?"

I'm sorry.

- Good luck, bro.

- Jake, remember

how I told you about

my college best friend

who was a guy,

and you said

that it was impossible

for guys and girls

to be friends,

'cause the guy always wants

to get in the girl's pants?

- Well, no, babe, what I

actually said was only guys

who are friends

with attractive women can't be.

- Jake Jones, meet my college

best friend Mitch Becker.

- How you doing?

- Nice to meet you.

- Oh, wait a minute.

I do remember!

Yeah, from some of the college

photos that you showed me.

- Yes!

- I didn't recognize you

without that perm.

- Ha ha ha.

- Knock it off.

- I'm just messing around.

Friend?

- Friends.

- Good. That's better.

Because I could not have you

come to my wedding

hating my fiance.

- Huh?

- Jake and I

are getting married.

- Really?

Congratulations.

When?

- Ten days.

- That's fantastic!

- You should stay

for the wedding!

Would you?

- Well, while he

contemplates that,

I'll go ahead

and pay the check.

- I'll get it.

- Okay.

- Just tell him

I'll be there in a sec.

I'm on my way, okay?

God!

Oh, wait a minute.

I have something for you.

- You do?

- Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Here you go.

- No!

Babe, it's beautiful.

Thank you.

- Wait a minute.

I just gave you a wedding ring.

I need a little something

extra than that.

Mmm.

- Mm. Thank you.

- She didn't think I could get

the ring resized

in time for the wedding.

- I didn't say that.

- But I did,

and she was wrong.

Like she always is.

- Okay, don't listen to him.

I am not always wrong.

- Oh, really?

What about the Christmas party

last year... remember?

- You're gonna bring up

the Christmas party?

- Yeah, I'm... you gotta

hear this, rich.

This is hysterical.

- Mitch.

- We're at this lame

Christmas party last year,

something for her mom's

whatever.

- Nice.

- They finally break out

this karaoke machine,

so I start doing

a couple of ll cool j songs.

It was hilarious.

Seriously.

- Honestly, it was awful.

- It was awesome.

Are you kidding?

The early stuff.

Not the later crap.

Anyway, so we get ready

to leave at the end of the night

and then Elizabeth here

starts dousing

her Debbie downer spray

all over the place,

getting on my case

about drinking too much,

having too much fun,

we gotta call a cab.

- So did you?

- No, I didn't call a cab.

She called a cab.

But I was fine to drive.

- No, you weren't.

That's why I called the cab.

- Point is

is that she was wrong.

She was wrong about that.

She's wrong about this thing.

She's wrong a lot of the time.

- I think we get it, okay?

- I think it's cute, though.

- Hey, okay. Um...

How about where I could

get a hotel around here.

- No. You'll just stay

with me and my mom.

- Whoa, whoa,

we got a big week ahead of us.

We got the wedding.

We got the race.

- What race?

- Jake and I have been training

for this couples marathon

for like six months.

- Couples marathon.

- Yeah.

It's a pretty big deal.

They only let like

12 couples even do it.

- You should come

with us tomorrow.

- What, you want him

to go to the race too?

Yeah, fine, why don't you come

to the bridal shower

while you're at it?

- Well, I don't want to impose.

- You're not imposing, and I'm

not gonna take no for an answer.

We have the perfect

guest room.

- Okay.

- And you'll stay

for the wedding?

- Sure.

- It's gonna be

just like old times!

- Just like old times.

- Sweetheart,

we really gotta get going.

- I have to go see Jake's dad

for a couple of things

for the wedding,

but I'll see you at the house.

Do you remember

how to get there?

- Yeah, yeah.

It's in the GPS.

- Okay. See you.

- Later, rich.

- It's Mitch.

Turn left.

In one mile, turn left.

You have arrived

at your destination.

- Yello.

- Yeah, hey, it's me.

- Oh, hey!

- Yeah, good job, nostradamus.

She's getting married

in ten days.

- All right, that's great!

- No, not to me.

- Oh...

I did not predict that.

- Yeah. I got a prediction.

When I get home, I'm gonna...

- Hi.

- Hi, Joyce, how are you?

- Good to see you.

- You too.

- Could you please tell my

father I'm here to see him?

- Sure.

- Thanks.

Sir, your son is here.

No, he's with Elizabeth.

Oh, okay.

You can go in.

- Thanks.

- Thanks.

- Oh, I'm sorry.

He just said Jake,

Elizabeth.

- Ah. It's okay.

Just go.

Damn it.

- Didn't I tell you

to come alone?

- She was with me.

What could I do?

- You drop her off at home

on the way.

Have a seat.

- What do you want, dad?

- Big Chinese exporter's

thinking about hiring this firm.

- That's great, but what does

that have to do with me?

- It always has something

to do with you.

Don't you wanna run

this firm one day?

- Are you thinking about

letting me handle the account?

- No. What,

do you think I'm crazy?

- Then why am I here, dad?

- Um...

You and, uh,

you and her doing okay?

I mean,

the wedding's still on?

- Well, if by her you mean

Elizabeth,

then the answer's yes,

the wedding's still on.

- She sign the prenup?

- So that's it?

Good old dad looking out

for the family interests?

And forget about love,

but let's just make sure

the money's safe, right?

- Did she sign the prenup?

- Yeah.

Yeah, she signed it.

Two days ago.

- Well, that's good, son.

That's good.

I can't afford any...

I mean, we can't afford

any problems,

any surprises.

The Chinese believe

that a good home life

is essential

to a good work life,

and their vetting process

is extremely thorough.

Any shenanigans

could blow this whole deal,

and we're talking big dollars.

I would appreciate it

if you didn't

embarrass your family

or this firm.

- Not to worry, dad.

I'll do my best

not to embarrass you.

- Good. Now that we're

on the same page,

you can go.

- Is this it right here?

- Yeah, this is it.

Oh, buddy, get down!

- Oh, that's okay,

Mrs. Carter.

I'm a dog person.

- Good news for you,

buddy.

Look,

I call you Mitch.

Why don't you just

call me Donna?

- Okay. Thank you, Donna.

- You're welcome.

You're welcome. If you need

anything, ask buddy.

- Okay.

- All right?

I'll be right downstairs.

- Thank you.

- Hi.

Now what, huh?

- You're not gonna

say anything

about what just happened

in there?

- You know, I think

it's really ridiculous

that you got this guy

staying at your place.

- Who, Mitch?

What's wrong with Mitch?

- Elizabeth, it's ten days

before our wedding.

Now, all of a sudden,

you have some ex-boyfriend...

- he's not my ex-boyfriend.

- That's right.

He's your best friend.

And ten days before

our wedding,

he decides to shack up with you

at your place?

- Oh, come on.

- Actually, it's not

even your place, though,

is it?

It's my place.

I...

I can't believe you would

throw that in my face.

You knew my mom and I's

situation.

You're the one

that came up with the idea

for us to live there.

I don't know what your dad

said to you up there,

but please stop taking it out

on me, okay?

- You gonna sign

the prenup?

- What?

- Are you gonna sign

the prenup?

- Jake, I haven't even

really had a chance to read...

- Elizabeth, I really

need you to sign that.

- Well, I've had a lot

on my mind with the race

and the wedding.

I'm working...

- Really? You've had

a lot on your mind?

I've had a lot

on my mind too.

I've had the race on my mind,

the wedding on my mind.

I have this prenup on my mind

that you seem to never

want to talk about.

Now guess what...

now I have Mitch on my mind.

Thanks for that.

Some dweeb I don't even know

who's staying with

my-soon-to-be wife

in the house that I paid for.

- I really don't want to talk to

you about this right now, okay?

Can you please

just take me home?

- Fine.

I'm sorry.

I love you.

- Love you too.

Welcome back.

Okay, now there has been

a lot of talk about voter fraud,

and we are here to discuss...

- hey, Donna?

- Hey.

- Yeah, I was gonna

go grab a beer.

Is anyplace close by?

- Oh. Up the street,

there's lucky's.

- Perfect. Can you tell

Elizabeth where I am?

- Of course. I think buddy

and I can handle that.

Right, buddy?

Have fun.

- Thank you.

Ooh!

Ah-oh!

- Hey, groin shots

are off-limits.

Anything else is fair game.

- Hi.

- Hey. What can I get you?

- I'll just have a beer,

please.

- Sure.

- Here you go.

- Thank you.

- Would you like

to start a tab?

- Sure.

- Aah!

- What is that?

- It's called the whipping post.

I'll have a beer too.

Put it on this guy's tab.

- Oh!

Where's Elizabeth?

- I dropped her home.

- Ah.

What are you doing here?

Don't you have

a big race tomorrow?

- What are you doing here?

- I'm just having a beer.

- No. What are you

doing here?

- Why would anybody

do that to themselves?

- I knew you were a wussy

from the moment I met you.

- I'm not a wussy.

I'm just not stupid.

- Oh, yeah?

Prove it.

- No.

See? Wussy.

- You actually challenging me

to a rat tail competition?

- Tell you what.

Bet 1,000 to your 100

you tap out first.

- Hey, everybody.

Jake just bet $1,000 to...

I'm sorry, what's your name?

- b*tch.

- Mitch.

- To Mitch that he can

take him in the whipping post!

Whipping post, whipping post!

Whipping post,

whipping post,

whipping post, whipping post,

whipping...

- let's do this.

- Whipping post, whipping post!

Whoo!

- Let's do it!

Okay, mates,

here are the rules.

Trade off whips with your towels

until someone taps out.

You tap out, you lose.

No head or groin shots.

Everything else is fair game.

If after five whips

there's still no winner,

we dunk those towels

in ice water, boys.

Understand?

- Yeah, I understand...

- Yeah, okay.

Let's whip it out, boys.

- So, uh, you know, how does

this get going here?

- Are these regulation towels?

- Oh!

- Ooh!

- See that, see that?

Kick his a*s, Nate!

- Come on.

- See what you got.

Ow!

- Seems kinda dumb.

Ah!

- Wanna tap out?

- I'm good.

Okay. Okay.

- Sure you wanna do this,

college friend?

Ow! God!

- Right in the nipple.

- That's a good shot.

Good shot.

- Need a break in this,

or what?

- No, we keep going.

Oh.

- Whoo!

Man, what...

oh, God!

- Oh!

- That was right there!

That was...

- sorry. I don't know.

I've never done it before.

- Keep your whips up.

- All right, I'll keep it up.

- Get this guy?

- We keeping score or...

- Ooh!

- That was a little high.

No, I know, it's...

- let's keep it down.

- You want out?

You good?

You w... ow!

Son of a...

You felt that one,

didn't ya?

- Ow! He's hitting

the same spot!

Come on! Can't he

move it around a little bit?

- You all right?

- Yeah!

One-trick pony?

Oh, what were the rules

again?

- Mm!

Aah!

- These two idiots

have actually made it

to the wet whip.

It is now time

for these two fools

to whip each other

at the same time.

- Just bow out, man.

- That's not gonna happen.

You bow out.

- Let's go.

Come on.

- Okay, let's whip it out,

boys.

- Let's whip it out.

Hey!

Are you both crazy?

That's it.

Show's over.

- Boo!

- Come on!

- What were you both

thinking?

- Talk about this tomorrow?

- I'm good with that.

- I'm taking Mitch home.

And I'm gonna see you

at 10:00 A.M.

What is that, your mom?

Ha ha ha!

Come on!

- You had him, Jake.

- Thanks.

- Somebody should tend

to those wounds,

but you're definitely

too drunk to drive.

- You got any suggestions?

- I live right upstairs.

- Tell me what the hell

are you thinking of

when you say

you say that I'm not

everything you want

Ah...

Ohh...

Oh!

Gah!

Ah!

- What the hell

were you thinking?

Do you need some help?

- If you've come to yell at me,

I think I'm suffering

enough as it is.

- I'm not gonna yell at you.

- Here.

- What the hell

were you thinking?

- Oh, my gosh.

Oh...

Ah!

- I'm sorry.

Ow...

- Oh, my gosh!

Where did you find this?

- Oh. Friggin' Dave.

He was busting my ba*ls

about that, so...

- You ate so many hot dogs

that day.

- 27. I remember

every one of them.

- I ate a lot too.

- If memory serves,

you had three.

- Three is a lot.

- Three's a lot?

- Yes. I mean, not as many

as 27, but...

- Well, no, yeah,

look at my face,

and, you know,

look at yours.

- We're babies.

Okay. I'm off to bed.

Good night.

- Good night.

Hey.

Don't you judge me.

You wanna sleep together?

- College.

- College.

Come on, open!

Hi.

- Hi.

- I can't get my door open.

You think you could

help me out?

- Your door...

Oh, that's nice.

- Yeah, it's stuck.

- Um...

Your door's stuck.

Yeah, let me, uh,

let me take a look.

- All runners should be

making your way

to registration now.

He said 10:00 A.M.

Right?

- Yeah.

- Maybe he got held up.

- I don't know, but I can't

wait for him anymore.

I'm gonna go register,

okay?

- We'll be right here,

honey.

- Donna, what's the deal

with this guy?

I don't know.

Oh, Mitch, I don't know.

Speak of the devil...

- Hey!

Hey, where have you been?

And what... why aren't you

dressed for the race?

- What... what?

Oh, my God!

Are you drunk?

- No, I'm not drunk.

I was drunk.

I'm just hung over now.

- Mitch, could you

grab his stuff?

- Hey, don't... don't...

don't touch my stuff, bro.

All right?

- If she sees you like this,

it will k*ll her.

- Relax, Donna.

Give me a break.

Where is she?

- She's at registration.

- Hey, I wasn't talking

to you, dirt bag!

You know, we could finish

what we started

last night if you want.

- All right,

let's go, 12-step.

- Oh, great.

That's what I thought.

Let's do this thing.

Ow! Ow!

- Nate...

Get away from me!

Ah... Uh...

- I'll go find a doctor.

- What happened?

- You do that!

- Whatever happens,

do not tell Elizabeth

you've been drinking.

- Just quit yelling at me!

God, I have a headache!

- Good luck to you.

- Thank you.

- Hi.

- Hi.

- Team name.

- Welcome back, Carter.

- Okay.

Here you go.

These are for you.

- Thanks.

- I'll see you

at the starting line.

- Okay.

- Next.

Team name.

- I'm not gonna be too sure

until I look at some x-rays.

But what I see so far looks like

a high ankle sprain.

- Ow! Ow!

- Oh, no, what happened?

Speak.

- I-it was a freak

accident, babe.

I stepped out of the car

and I rolled my ankle.

- Is that the truth?

Mitch.

- It's pretty much

what I saw.

- Do you think there's

any possibility

of him running today?

- Babe, he's a doctor.

I can't run.

- Like I say,

I gotta look at some x-rays.

- So that's it?

What about Mrs. Stanton

and her kids?

- I think the pledges

will understand.

- Final call

for registration.

- I don't think so.

- Well, we're not

gonna find out,

'cause I'll run.

- What?

- If you'll have me.

- I will so have you.

Can you handle Jake?

Mitch and I have

a race to run.

- Wait, whoa...

wait, wait, wait...

- go get 'em, guys.

- Wait, I...

- shh, shh, shh,

shh, shh, shh.

- Ow!

- All couples should be

making their way

to the starting line.

- I got it, I got it.

- How long is this thing

anyway?

- Probably best

if you don't know.

Just remember,

keep an even pace

and remember

that you're doing it

for Mrs. Stanton and her kids.

- Mrs. Stanton

and her kids. Right.

Okay. This gonna

mess up my pedicure?

- The Pasadena couples marathon

is about to begin.

- I should have gone

to the bathroom first, right?

- Ladies and gentlemen,

do not break your connection,

or you will be disqualified.

Also, make sure

you stay in the course,

especially when you hit

trail hill.

- Trail what?

- Shh!

- There... there's a hill?

- In your position.

On your marks...

Get set...

- But you took control

of me

you pulled the rug

from under my feet

so this is the way

it's supposed to be

I never knew

a love like this

when I was searching

forever

to find someone better

to show me

a love like this

- Ow!

- Oh, stop complaining.

- Donna, I can do it

by myself, all right?

- Oh, shut up.

I'm helping.

- I can't believe she's running

that race with Mitch.

I bet they don't even

finish.

- Oh, h*!

She will.

I just hope Mitch

survives.

- Jesus is on the main line

tell him what you want

oh, Jesus is on

the main line

tell him what you want

Jesus is on the main line

tell him what you want

call him up

and tell him what you want

Jesus is on the main line

tell him what you want

oh, Jesus is on

the main line

tell him what you want

Jesus is on

the main line

tell him what you want

call him up

- good job, guys.

- And tell him

what you want

- So he just stepped in,

huh?

- I know.

Crazy, right?

- Yeah. Well, we have

checkpoints all over this place.

If they were to have quit,

we would have

found out by now.

- Come on, baby!

Whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo!

Come on, baby!

- Oh, wow.

- Whoo, whoo, whoo.

Are you all right?

Are you all right?

- Whoa, whoa, whoa,

whoa, whoa.

- Oh, my gosh.

- Hey, hey.

You okay?

- Oh, my gosh!

Should we call an ambulance?

Oh!

- Oh, my God.

- Oh, my God.

Put your arm around me.

Hold on.

Oh, look at this.

Oh, my God!

- Go, Lizzie!

- You all right?

- Mitch!

Here, sweetheart.

Oh, my God.

You okay?

Come on.

- As I get closer

and closer to Elizabeth,

I'm beginning to feel more

and more confident about this.

- Morning, sunshine.

- Good morning, mommy.

Mommy?

- You're not my mom!

- Mm-mm.

Good thing.

- Oh.

Oh, God, it hurts to move.

- I figured it would.

That way,

you can't kick me out.

- Doesn't it remind you

of when we were camping?

I could stay here all day.

- I don't think

I have a choice.

I think I left my credit card

at the bar the other night.

- Lizzie!

Are you up?

- Uh, yeah.

- Just got a call

from the wedding photographer.

He needs to change

his appointment

to 10:30 A.M. tomorrow.

- Okay. Thank you.

- You're welcome!

- I actually forgot

I had that appointment today.

- I'm sorry, Liz,

I have to ask.

- Yes?

Why are you marrying

this guy?

- Excuse me?

- No, I'm just saying,

it's...

From what I've seen,

you're not very happy with him.

And if you don't mind me

saying,

he's kind of a d*ck.

- Wow.

- What, you disagree?

- What would you like

for me to do, Mitch?

Do you want me to dump Jake

and marry you?

- And who do you think

you are,

you're gonna come here

after ten years

and you're gonna

judge me?

- Wait a second.

For... ow.

For your information,

I barely made it

through Texas

coming out here

to find you.

If I want to judge,

I'll judge!

- Okay, now we're gonna

play that card?

The "I worked so hard

to find you"?

Come on, give me a break.

- It's no card.

- Fine.

I'll bite.

Laura!

There he is.

- Hey, Rudy...

- come here, you!

Bring it in.

Bring it in.

So... I heard you're spending

the night at my sister's.

- Uh, yes, sir.

- Did you have sex with her yet?

- Rudy!

- Sorry.

I'm just kidding.

But I heard she's good.

I'm just kidding!

Hey, would you like to hang out

with us a bit?

Me and my boys, we're gonna be

hanging around the fire,

saying a couple chants.

- What kinda chants?

- Well, number one,

our lord and savior, j. C.

- J...

- Jesus Christ.

- Right.

Can I ask

what the bonfire's about?

I mean, don't you guys

usually burn... Crosses?

- Whoa, whoa.

Who do you think we are?

- K.K.K.?

- What would

make you say that?

- It might have something to do

with the white robes.

- Laura, first of all,

they're not white...

they're taupe.

- You've heard of

the hell's angels?

- Of course.

- Well, they are

the heaven's angels.

- Oh...

- We're a small group,

but we're growing fast.

- The robes are what they call

angel shrouds.

- Yo, Rudy, the boys are getting

restless waiting on you.

How much longer

we gotta wait?

- Would you like to join us

for our ceremony this evening?

- If I refuse?

- I'll just have

the boys come over and, uh,

they'll just

kick the snot outta you.

- Let's chant!

- All right, well,

you boys have fun.

I'm outta here.

- You're going?

- Oh, yeah.

- Let's go.

- Okay.

- Yeah. A biker g*ng

called the heaven's angels

in Texas?

That's ridiculous.

- Rudy turned out to be

a really nice guy.

He gave me his card.

- You know what?

Jake proposed to me,

I said yes,

and we're getting married.

- Well, great.

Good. Fine.

Good for you!

- You know...

Buddy!

Come on,

let's wake Mitch up!

Wait... no, bu... no.

Buddy, n-n...

Aah!

- Excuse me.

- Oh, hey, man.

Sorry. We don't open

for another hour.

- Yeah, I know.

I was in here the other night.

I think I left

my credit card.

I was...

Playing the, uh,

whipping post.

- Yes!

I remember you!

You're awesome!

- Thank you.

- Yeah. No, man,

you're one tough

son of a b*tch!

- Thank you.

Uh, the credit card.

- Oh, you don't just like

staring at each other

awkwardly.

Sorry. I'll be right back.

- Thank you.

I'll call you later.

- What are you doing here?

- Picking up my credit card.

What are you doing here?

- Nothin'.

I don't know what

you think you saw here,

but, uh...

You didn't see anything.

- Didn't say I did.

- Good.

- Mr. Mitch Becker...

Here you go.

- Thank you.

- Oh, and on tabs this high,

we automatically add 20%.

- You have a pen?

- Probably.

- I only got a few minutes,

whoever you are.

I... oh.

- Hello, Donna.

- Stanley Jones.

What brings you out here?

- Well, for starters,

I was hoping

that you would fix me one of

your delicious cups of coffee.

The house looks great.

- Thank you.

- How's Elizabeth?

I understand that she has

an old friend in town visiting.

- Oh, Mitch. He drove all

the way from Boston to see her.

She's so excited.

They haven't seen each other

since college.

- How heartwarming.

- You've never been good

at smalltalk, Stan.

Why are you here?

- I just wanna make sure

that she's going forward

with this wedding.

- Well, of course she is.

Why would you...

you don't think...

Oh, Stan!

They're just friends.

Trust me.

You have nothing to worry about.

- You're right, Donna.

I'm not very good

at small talk.

I want your assurance

that my son's wedding

is gonna go off

without a hitch.

It would be a shame

if I had to...

Sell certain assets

in order to make up my losses.

- Well, let me be

perfectly clear.

You can be well assured

that the wedding will go on

as planned.

- Thank you.

I can get the key in,

but then when I turn it...

oh!

Just the new paint

sticking to the door.

Thank you.

- Oh, I'm Elizabeth Carter.

- Hi, Elizabeth.

- And you are...

- Oh.

I'm b*tch maker.

Mitch. Becker.

- Fourth floor.

What the hell?

Hey, roomie.

- Hi.

Mm.

Uh, well, I'll leave

you two alone.

- You know, we should

hang out some time.

- Gr-oss!

- That'd be great.

See ya.

- Yeah.

Bye.

- Bye.

- What happened

to you, man?

- Oh, I just fell in love.

- I just got high

in the quad.

- College.

- College.

- Hey, hey.

- Hey.

- Somebody had a long

day at work, huh?

- Yes.

- Care to join me?

You know I hate

drinking alone.

- Sure.

- Here you go.

- Thank you.

- Cheers.

Listen, Elizabeth,

I want to apologize

for the way...

- No, Mitch, honestly,

I'm the one

that owes the apology.

After I thought about it,

I can totally understand

why you felt that way

about Jake.

- Listen, I don't even

know him...

- no, no, just...

Let me finish, okay?

This is kind of difficult

for me to say.

My parents always thought

that they'd retired here.

And then my dad died suddenly,

and both of us

were really devastated.

Six months later,

I'm living in Los Angeles

and I'm about to get married,

and then that didn't happen

because I found my fiance

in bed with my best friend.

My life was kinda

going nowhere.

I felt like... Felt like

I needed to move home,

and then once I got here,

I found out my mom

was about to lose the house.

She got caught up in one of

those refinancing schemes,

and she had no choice

but to sell or be foreclosed.

- Mm. Wow.

- That's when I met Jake.

He came to look

at the house

and pretty soon realized that

all he could do was look at me.

I know it sounds

really silly,

but after

what I had been through,

it felt really nice.

We went to dinner.

I explained our situation.

And shortly after that,

he bought the house

and said that we could stay.

- For free?

- His family

has a lot of money.

- Ah, I see.

For free

as long as the two of you

are together.

- It's really not like that.

He proposed.

I said yes.

And here we are.

- What can I say

about that?

- I guess I don't really

need you to say anything.

- Thank you.

- Woman...

- shh.

- Potter residence.

- Hey, Donna,

is Elizabeth there?

- Oh, good morning, Jake.

I think she's awake... she must be

around here somewhere.

Let me try and fi...

it's for you.

- Hey, you.

- Hello, sweetheart.

Look, I'm sorry,

but I'm not gonna

be able to make

that photographer

appointment this morning.

- Uh...

Is... okay.

Is everything all right?

- No, everything's fine,

but my dad just wants

to show me

this building he's thinking

of purchasing.

You mind going on your own?

- I would like for you

to be there,

but if you can't,

I can do it by myself.

- That's my girl.

Okay. I'll see you

when I get back.

- What now?

- Jake has to go meet his dad,

so I get to go to

the photographer by myself.

- Want me to go with you?

- No.

I'm okay.

Thank you.

- Pretty please?

- No. Let me read you

your horoscope instead.

- Oh, please.

- Leo.

- Good morning.

- Good morning.

Um...

I was coming

to actually tell you

that I'm leaving to go meet

with the wedding photographer.

I'll be back

in a little bit, though.

- That's good,

'cause your mom asked me

to clean some stuff out

in the garage, so...

- She did?

That's nice of you.

Thank you.

- Oh, not a problem.

All right, I'll see you later.

- Yeah.

- Awesome.

- Yeah.

Oh, my God.

- Hey, d*uche bag,

you and me

gotta talk, bro.

- What is your problem now?

- What'd you tell her, man?

- I see the ankle

healed up nice.

- Screw my ankle, all right?

What did you tell her?

- I didn't tell her

anything, okay?

'Cause it would

devastate her.

- Give me a break.

You expect me to believe that?

After what I saw

last night?

- Last night?

There was nothing to see.

- I saw you!

I was right over there!

She kissed you!

And you kissed her back.

You love her, man!

You've always loved her.

Elizabeth made her choice,

okay?

And whether I like it or not,

I'm not gonna do anything

to screw up her life.

- Well, guess what, jerk off?

That's exactly what

you're doing.

Now, I'm gonna

be back in an hour.

Make up any bogus excuse

you want,

but when I get back,

your bags better be packed

and you better be

headed back to Boston.

Got it?

Whoa!

Buddy!

It's okay, buddy.

- Oh...

- Help me get him in the car.

- Uh... No. No.

- Where you going?

Jake, help me get buddy

in the car!

- What...

- Okay, buddy.

It's okay, I'm here.

One, two, three.

Okay, bud.

Okay, I got you.

I got you.

Donna.

Donna, get the car!

- Dr. Dana Burke,

please dial extension 202.

Dr. Burke, please dial

extension 202.

- Oh, honey,

honey, honey.

Honey.

I'm so glad you're here.

- Is buddy okay?

- Mitch is back there

with the doctor right now.

- I've called Jake

a hundred times.

He's not answering

his phone.

Mitch!

- Listen, it's gonna be okay.

- Oh, my God, your shirt.

- It's okay, all right?

The doctors are with him

right now.

He's gonna be out in a second

to let us know

what's going on.

- How is he?

- Well, we were able

to stop the bleeding

and repair the damage

to the leg and the abdomen.

- Is he gonna be okay?

- It looks very good.

He'll have a full recovery.

- Thank you.

- Thank Mitch.

It was Mitch's quick action

that saved buddy's life.

- Thank you.

- Can we see him?

- Sure. Just remember,

he's a little out of it.

He hasn't been moved

to recovery yet,

but I'm sure he'd like to see

his mom and dad.

- Oh, Mitch isn't his dad.

He's a friend visiting

in town.

- Excuse me.

Sorry to interrupt you,

but I have some paperwork

that needs filling out.

- No problem.

You two go.

- Thank you, mom.

- I'll take care of this.

- I'm just gonna give you guys

a couple minutes,

then we have to move him.

- You okay?

You wanna be alone?

- No.

Hey...

- I'm just glad

he's gonna be all right.

- Me too.

- Yeah.

Oh, honey.

Oh...

thank you, Mitch.

Thank you so much.

Okay. I'll see you both

at home.

- Drive safe, mom.

- Okay.

- I'm just happy

he's coming home in a few days.

That's great.

- It's Jake. I don't want

to deal with that right now.

You wanna go get

something to eat?

- You know, I know my timing

kinda sucks right now,

but, um... I think

I'm gonna go.

- Oh, okay.

Um...

See you at the house.

- No. I mean I'm gonna leave.

- Like for good?

Mitch, we still have

the wedding.

I need you there.

- You don't need me there.

- Yes, I do.

- Why?

Why do you need me there?

It's your wedding,

for Christ's sake.

- You never really talked

to me like that before.

And you know what, Mitch?

You're right.

Your timing could not be worse.

- Why is it so important

that I be at your wedding, huh?

You wanna rub it

in my face?

- Rub it in your face?

What are you talking about?

- God, jeez...

Jake is right.

I am a wuss.

You might as well just

make me the maid of honor.

- What does that mean?

- You don't get it, do you?

- Get what?

- I'm in love with you.

- Why would you

tell me that?

- I've wanted to tell you that

since the first time I met you.

Do you know why

I came to find you?

Do you remember

what we said to each other?

The day before graduation.

Ten years ago.

- Tell me.

Mitch, tell me.

- Take care of yourself.

- Hey.

Donna filled me in.

Are you okay?

- No.

- I know you just

wanna save me

how bad I wanna let you

'cause there's so much

I wanna be

and I don't wanna

regret you

but I miss you

when you're gone

I wanted this

so very long

and I feel a breakdown

coming on

- Hi. Is this Rudy?

- I'm losing it,

I gotta let you go

while I go through this

I'm losing it,

don't wanna say good-bye

but I can't do this

I'm losing it,

I know it's time

I tried it all

I loved and I won

and still I fall

but I'm finally losing it

so hard waking up alone

and chasing my dreams

it's so far

to walk this road

with no guarantees

and never know

that every song

reminds me of you

being gone

and I feel a breakdown

coming on

I'm losing it,

I gotta let you go

while I go through this

I'm losing it,

don't wanna say good-bye

but I can't do this

I'm losing it,

I know it's time

I tried it all

I loved and I won

and still I fall

but I'm finally losing it

oh, when I'm out of town

and you're not around

I'll be breaking down

I'm breaking down

- I'm looking

at the same numbers.

But, well, no, I can assure you,

it's all tax deductible.

It is.

Let's go through

last month's projected

and actually see

where we came out.

I think you're gonna

be very happy.

- I'm losing it,

I'm losing it

I'm losing it, I'm losing it

I'm losing it

I gotta let you go

while I go through this

I'm losing it,

don't wanna say good-bye

but I can't do this

I'm losing it

honey, I don't wanna

put you through this

I'm losing it,

baby, please don't cry

but I can't do this

I'm losing it

oh, oh, no

I'm losing it

oh oh

I'm losing it

I know it's time,

I tried it all

I loved and I won

and still I fall

but I'm finally

losing it

I'm losing it.

- You look beautiful.

Your father

would be so...

Proud today.

- Yeah?

- Yeah.

Elizabeth...

You need to stop.

Mitch isn't coming.

- I know. I just can't

stop thinking about him.

It's my wedding day, and all

I think about is Mitch.

- It may sound strange, but

I keep thinking about him too.

- Mother!

- What?

He's a nice republican.

- He's actually

a registered independent.

- On the outside.

Not in here.

- I miss him.

- Is she here?

- You're not supposed

to be here.

- Donna, I'm gonna be

married to this woman

in about 30 minutes.

I think it's okay

if I see her now, okay?

- No, no. Not until

she walks down that aisle.

- Fine. Fine.

You haven't seen Mitch

around, have you?

- No. He isn't here.

- Good.

'Cause the next time I see him,

I'm gonna put him

in the hospital... you got it?

- Will you stop with that?

He's the one who saved buddy

after you hit him and took off.

Besides... They made

a pact ten years ago

to marry each other

only for him to find out

that she's marrying you

instead.

So I think I'd cut him

a little slack, honey.

- They made a pact?

Gosh, Donna,

I don't know what to say.

That's so touching.

Come on, are you kidding me?

Who the hell even does that?

And that whole buddy thing,

by the way?

I was trying to protect

my family's reputation.

- Go back

to your friends, Jake.

We'll see you downstairs.

- Yeah, I'll see you

downstairs.

- Everything okay?

- Everything's fine.

It's terrific. So...

You ready to get married?

- How's dad?

Well, look, I'm gonna see

you guys Sunday anyway, okay?

Yes, I'm still

coming for dinner.

Okay?

I love you too.

All right, bye.

Buddy?

Buddy!

Ha ha ha!

Is that you?

You look great?

- I was about to say

the same thing about you.

Looks like someone

took up jogging.

- What are you doing here?

- I just thought

that you'd like to see

that buddy was doing okay.

- So you came all the way to

Boston to tell me buddy's okay.

- No, actually,

I came all the way to Boston

to show you

that buddy was okay.

- Why would you do that?

- Well...

- Will you stop with that?

He's the one who saved buddy

after you hit him and took off.

Besides... They made

a pact ten years ago

to marry each other,

only for him to find out

that she's marrying you

instead.

- Everything okay?

- Everything's fine.

It's terrific. So...

You ready to get married?

- Sorry.

- Whoa, compadre.

Where do you think you're going?

- Who the hell are you?

Get your hands off me!

Ow! Ow!

- Now, we can do this

the easy way,

or we can do this my way.

It's your choice.

- Mother... ow! Ow!

- Okay. It's my way.

Let's go.

- Ladies and gentlemen,

may I have

your attention, please?

I'm sorry to inform you,

but there will no longer

be a wedding here today.

It seems that the bride to be

has had a change of heart.

And as I look around

this beautiful setting,

it seems none of you

are shocked.

- Excuse me, but you're

hurting my son.

- Yes, I am.

- Would you please stop?

- Where's Donna?

No worries.

Elizabeth called me.

Jake, it's over.

Don't come looking

for Elizabeth... ever.

If you do, you're not

gonna find her...

you're gonna find me.

And I'm from Texas.

That means

I'll barbecue his a*s!

Oh!

- Y...

- no.

Learn to leave

on a high note.

- You gonna be okay?

- I'll be fine.

Take care of her.

- Will do.

- Thank you.

- Good night, everybody.

- You know what, guys?

I'm gonna go catch

the laker game.

- You don't have to worry

about him anymore.

Ha ha ha!

So where we heading?

- Boston.

- Ha ha! Beantown. Sweet!

- Hey, baby,

we just picked her up.

We're on our way.

- Hold on, girls.

- Whoo-hoo!

- Whoo!

- Yee-haw!

- And we didn't stop

until we got here.

- Why would you do that?

- I needed to see you.

I wanted to make things

right between us.

- Well...

You saw me.

You...

buddy looks great.

- Mitch, wait.

It was the day

of graduation,

and you were talking to Dave

and I went over to steal you.

I told you what a special

friend you were to me...

And if I have a regret

it's that

I never gave you a chance.

I never gave us a chance.

So here I am

asking for a chance.

Mitch Becker,

will you do me the honor

of fulfilling a promise

that I made to you?

Will you marry me?

I love you, and I wanna

spend the rest...

- wait, stop.

I must have gone over

this moment

a thousand times in my head

and...

Never once did I ever imagine

it was going to be you

proposing to me.

You're the love

of my life.

Course I'm gonna marry you.

Wait, wait.

One condition.

We don't... we don't wait.

We do this.

No engagement.

No ceremony.

No photographers.

We just...

We do this right now.

We go down to city hall

and do it... what do you say?

Deal?

- I think I can do one better.

- It's such a long way

back to you

Hey, it's me.

Hold on, I'm gonna

put you on speaker.

Okay, you're on.

- What's up, my brother?

- Rudy!

- Hey, Mitch, what's happening?

- Oh, my gosh, Laura,

how are...

is Dave with you?

- He sure is.

- And I'm with her.

Ha ha ha!

So, man, any news.

- Well, I think we need

pastor Rudy.

We're getting married.

- Oh, congratulations.

- There you go, my man.

All right!

- Wait, wait.

Rudy's a pastor?

- Hell, yeah.

Online, baby.

You can get a license

or anything.

- How soon can you be here?

We wanna do it today.

- Uh, half an hour?

- Okay, we'll see you soon.

You know, they did say

that we had 30 minutes.

- Yes, they did.

Well, to quote my friend

Dave,

I did not predict that.

And if there's one thing

I've learned, it's...

- oh, wait, wait, wait.

Buddy!

- I'm sorry.

Where was I?

Ah, forget it.

I'm getting married!

Buddy come on!

- The feeling's all around me

and I can hardly wait

I'm still

that boy from Texas

and I'm already home

no matter where I am

I know I'm home

and I'm already home

no matter where I am

I know I'm home

- Now you know

what it feels like.

Ooh!

Turnabout.

Rah!

- When the girls

rule the world

when the girls rule

the world

when the girls

rule the world

there's a party

every night of the week

ride the beat

and come with me

oh oh oh-oh-oh,

oh oh oh

oh oh oh-oh-oh

a little less thinking,

a lot more drinking

throw your hands up

tonight you're dressed

to impress

don't know where

you'll wind up

life of the party,

pour more bacardi

till the sun's up

yes, we can, yes, we can,

yes, we can

the drinks are flowing

when we get going

life's so easy

steps up the side,

I can't hide

when the beat

starts moving through me

get the magic drink,

make him feel lovesick

I'm thinking maybe

yes, we can, yes, we can,

yes, we can

and if we have it our way,

then one day

the time would soon come

when the girls

rule the world

wah ah ah

when the girls

rule the world

wah ah ah ah,

when the girls rule the world

wah ah ah

there's a party

every night of the week

ride the beat

and come with me

come with me

and feel the heat

heat heat heat

feel the heat

and dance with me

oh oh oh-oh-oh

oh oh oh

oh oh oh

there's a party

every night of the week

ride the beat

and come with me

I've missed mischief

and missed misbehaving

it's a wild,

wild lust for life

that I've been craving

gotta party tonight

bumpin' till I-light

don't think twice,

roll the dice

naughty, never nice

I've missed mischief

and missed misbehaving

it's a wild,

wild lust for life

that I've been craving

gotta party tonight

bumpin' till I-light

don't think twice,

roll the dice

naughty, never nice

and if we have it our way

then one day

the time would soon come

when the girls

rule the world

wah ah ah

when the girls

rule the world

wah ah ah ah,

when the girls rule the world

wah ah ah

there's a party

every night of the week

ride the beat

and come with me

come with me

and feel the heat

heat heat heat

feel the heat

and dance with me

oh oh oh-oh-oh

oh oh oh

oh oh oh

there's a party

every night of the week

ride the beat

and come with me

oh oh oh-oh-oh

oh oh oh

oh oh oh

there's a party

every night of the week

ride the beat

and come with me