01x12 - Rudy's Sick

[bunniefuu]

Calling All Partners!

Calling All New Law Partners!

Come On Down And
Get Your Breakfast!

I'm Not A Partner Yet.

You Will Be
This Afternoon.

That's Why You Should
Have A Hearty Breakfast.

I'll Have Coffee.

I'm Too Nervous To Eat.

You've Been With This Firm
For Seven Years.

You're The Best Lawyer
They've Seen.

You Have Brought In
Top-Notch Clients.

On Top Of That,
You Have Raised Five Children

And A Very Homely Husband.

Everything Hinges On
This One Interview

With This Man I've Never Met.

You Are Charming.

You Are Beautiful.

You Are Intelligent.

And You Are, Because I Know,
Ruthless.

You'll Blow This Man Away.

He's Not The Kind Of Man
You Blow Away.

He's The Founding Partner.

But Can He Do His Hair And
Makeup In Seven Minutes?

I'm Going To Get Dressed.

Mom, You...

Take It Up With
Your Father.

Dad, Go Check Rudy.

What's The Matter?

She's Sick.

How Do You Know?

She Woke Me Up Today...

Yeah?

When I Pushed Her Away,
She Felt Warm.

I'll Check On Her.

Could I Sleep
In Denise's Room Tonight?

I Don't Think That's Necessary.

Could I Wear One Of Your Masks?

Before You Start Worrying
About Catching Anything

Let's Find Out
If She's Really Sick.

Okay, But I
Know She Is.

Have You Written
A Prescription For Her Yet?

No, I'm Waiting For
A Second Opinion.

Hi, Pumpkin, What's Wrong?

I Don't Feel Good.

Aha.

Okay.

Well, Now, Where
Does It Hurt?

All Over.

Bobo's Sick, Too.

Where Does Bobo Hurt?

His Throat.

His Throat Hurts.
Okay.

Well, Uh...

No, No. I'll Look
At Bobo Later.

You Slide Over This Way.

That's Fine.

Now, Just Relax.

Does That Hurt?

How About Here?

How About When You Swallow?

Yes.

Open Up A Little Bit.

You Can
Open

Bigger Than That.

I Can See Your Feet.

Yeah!

Okay.

Vanessa Says Rudy's Sick?

Uh, Yeah.

Did You Check Her Glands?

Yes, They're
Slightly Swollen.

Is There Swelling?

Just A Little...

We Should Call
A Doctor.

Did You
Take

Her Temperature?

No...

He Has To Take
Bobo's First.

Cliff, Take The Bear's
Temperature, Please.

All Right, Bobo

Put This Under Your Tongue
And Don't Bite Down.

She Can't Go To School

And I Have
That Interview.

I'll Call Mrs. Davis.

We Don't Need Her.

I Don't Work Until : .

You're Back By Then.

You Don't Cater
To Sick Children Like I Do.

If I Weren't Here, You Wouldn't
Be Taking Bobo's Temperature.

Bobo Does Not Have A Pulse.

What's Bobo's Temperature?

Zero.

Come On.

Which Is Just Above Normal
For A Bear This Size.

Now, Bobo, I Want
You To Stay Warm

Drink Plenty Of Liquids

And No Salmon Fishing
For At Least A Week.

What?

Where Are You Going?

To School.

Is It Scarecrow Day?

Everybody's Dresses Like This
At A Slob Rally.

Didn't You Do That?

Only In Medical School.

We Were So Tired, We Didn't
Know What We Were Wearing.

Is This Okay?

No, But If Everyone Else
Is Not Okay, It's Okay.

See You Later.

I Need You To Sign
My History Paper.

You Do This Every Time.

You Give Me The Paper

And You Put Your Hand
Over Whatever It Is.

I Can't See What It Is.

Take Your Hand Off.

Okay.

A "B+"?

I Asked The Teacher.

It's Not A Mistake.

It's A "B+"!

I Took Your Advice.

While I Was Writing,
No Tv, No Music, No Food.

I'm Proud Of You.

An "A" Would Have Been Better.

An "A" Is Great.

The Fact That You Applied
Yourself Is What's Important.

Thanks, Dad.

Thank You.

Cliff.

Did You See The "B+"?

Yes.

Here's A List.

Keep Her In Bed.

Give Her Liquids
And Aspirin.

I Don't Believe You.

You Went To Law School
And Got A Degree In Medicine.

I'll Try To Keep
This Meeting Brief.

If Her Temperature
sh**t Up, Call Me.

Hey.

Yes?

You Look Nice.

Thank You.

Hey.

Yeah?

Tomorrow, I'm Going To Celebrate
By Taking Out The New Partner.

Okay?

Wish Me Luck.

Good Luck.

I Have A Wife Who's About
To Become A Partner

In One Of The Most Prestigious
Law Firms In The Country

A Son Who Got A "B+"
On A Book Report

And Said It Was Because

He Believes Now That
He Should Apply Himself.

I'm In Seventh Heaven.

Rudy:
Daddy!

Yeah?

Did Mommy Leave?

Yeah.

What Do You Want?

Mommy.

Do Horses Get Sick?

Yes.

That's Why There
Are Veterinarians.

Do Dinosaurs Get Sick?

In The Old Days,
The Tarynaronosauramises--

Ooh, Those Dudes, They Would Be
From Here All The Way Downtown.

And You Don't Want To See One
Get A Head Cold And Sneeze.

You'll Have To Hold On
To Your Bed, Jack.

Vanessa Said I Have Germs.

What Kind Are They?

Oh, Yeah.

See, You Have...

You Have The, Uh...
The Tryptopendantpernsaps.

Tryptoperensaps?

The Tryps, As They Like
To Call Themselves

They Hang Around Water
Fountains And Glasses

And Things Like That.

And They Keep Saying,
"Where's The Party?

"I Love
To Party.

I Just Love To Just Get Inside
Of A Young Body And Just Party."

Why Me?

They Chose You Because
You're Young And You're Cute.

They Go Inside Your Body

And Say,
"It's A Lovely Place To Party."

And They Start To
Move Around All Fast.

"Ooh, This Is A Hot Party."

Then They Bump
Into The Corpuscles

And Do The Boogie Down,
"Party, Party, Party."

How Do I Get Rid Of Them?

You Drink A Lot Of Liquids.

The Liquids Go In Your Body
And Cool You Down.

The Tryps,
They're Out There Saying

"It's Getting Kind
Of Chilly In Here."

They Don't Care For That Much.

And Then

You Take Some Aspirin,
You Understand?

You Put The Aspirin In.

Aspirin To
A Trypsocornomanomenanus

Is Just Like Beets To A Girl
I Know Named Rudy Huxtable.

Yuck!

And If You Really
Want To Get Them

You Gargle.

You Take This Stuff And Gargle.

(Gargling)

That Causes A Vibration
That's Like An Earthquake.

Now The Trypsacordamama
Are Like This.

You Give Them The Aspirin,
And They're Going--

"Yuck, Yuck."

And Then You Add The Earthquake,
They Say, "Oh, God."

They Get Up And Say,
"Whoa, Let's Get Out Of Here."

And They're Gone.

Do You Feel Better?

Yes!

Are We Ready To Get Rid Of
The Tryptomondplamenisis?

Yes!

Come On.

Now, We're Going To Take Three
Of These Chewable Aspirin.

What's The Matter?

Mommy Crushes Them.

Okay, Three Chewable Aspirin

Crushed, Just Like
Mommy Would Crush Them.

Walking Like Mommy.

What's The Matter?

Mommy Puts Orange Juice In It.

Mommy Putting Orange Juice In
And Walking Like Mommy.

Okay.

Orange Juice

In The
Crushed
Aspirin.

Stirring And Smiling,
Just Like Mommy.

Okay.

Coming Up.

Mommy Does An Airplane.

Single Engine Or Jet?

Single Engine!

Okay.

Coming Up.

(Imitating Single
Engine Aircraft)

Open Up.
Open Up.

There You Go.

Oh, Boy.

Looks Good.

Thank You, Daddy.

You're Welcome, Dear.

(Gargling)

No More Parties In There.

I Don't Know, Cliff.

Mr. Halifax
Is Already Minutes Late.

Are You Sure Everything Is Okay?

Are You Sure?

I'll Be Home... Bye.

Huxtable?

Yes.

Halifax.

Pleased To
Meet You.

Sorry I'm Late.

I Had To Say Hello

To Barney,
The Elevator Operator.

He's An Old Friend.

Nervous?

A Little.

I Checked Your Record--
You're Good.

Thank You.

Did You Have Breakfast?

Never Skip Breakfast--
Most Important Meal Of The Day.

I Always Have Oatmeal, Milk
And A Drop Of Honey.

Two Eggs-- Poached--

Bacon, Rye Toast
And A Martini.

Auerbach Says You
Handle Yourself Well In Court.

I'm Glad He's Noticed.

I've Had A...

Auerbach's Good.

Charlie Patterson And I
Hired Him.

Mr. Patterson Retired
Before I...

Charlie Patterson Introduced Me
To My Haberdasher, Joe Drucker.

Joe's Gone Now. He's Passed On.

Joe Sold Me This Tie.

Nice.

They Don't Make Ties
Like This Anymore-- Feel It.

What Are You Feeling?

Silk.

Quality.

You Can't Beat Quality When
It Comes To Clothes Or Lawyers.

This Tie Will
Never Go Out Of Style.

Mr. Auerbach And I
Have Worked Very Closely...

Do You Skip Lunch, Too?

Not Usually.

I Always Have The Same Thing:

Mushroom Barley, Rye Bread,
A Garden Salad And A Martini.

Where's Mommy?

Mom Called And Said
She Would Be A Little Late.

Why Do I Have To
Stay Down Here?

Because This Is One Floor
Above Dad's Office.

So You'll Be
Closer To Me.

Why Do I Have To
Stay On The Couch?

Couch?
This Isn't A Couch.

Yes, It Is.

This Is A Super-Duper
Get-Well Island, You See.

This Whole
Thing Here.

And On The Super-Duper Island
You Have Your Own Telephone

And Now You're Going To Have
Your Little Books To Mark In.

Do Your Letters
And Numbers.

All This Will
Help You Feel Better.

I Feel Better Now.

This Is The Telephone.

To Reach Daddy, You Dial...

- - .

And That's All You Dial.

The Last Time
You Dialed A Lot Of Numbers

You Called The Honduras.

Stay On The Island,
Don't Get Off Of It, All Right?

All Right.

Ahh!

Get Back
In There.

Those Fish Are Going To
Bite Your Toes Off.

They're Not Biting My Toes.

Mr. Yamato.

Mr. Yamato.

Every Time We Talk About

What Will Happen
In The Delivery Room

He Passes Out.

When Did This Start?

When He Saw
The Childbirth Film In Class.

Now Whenever You
Mention "The Film" He's Gone.

I'm Fine, Let Me Up.

You Fainted, Honey.

I'm Fine Now.

Take It Easy.

Would You Like
Some Water?

No, Thanks.

Where Were We?

You Said You Want
To Be In The Deliver Room.

Yes, I Want
To Support Janet.

Now, When You Saw The Film...

Doctor!

Sorry.

Okay, Mr. Yamato,
Just Take It Easy.

I Have To Be There
To Help Janet.

That's Wonderful.

But I Want You To Know

That When A Woman
Is In Transition

There's A Change.

This Woman Will Have
The Strength Of Ten Men.

And This Lovely Person
That You Know

May Call You Names
That You've Never Heard Before.

Janet?

Yes. What Did They Say
After The Film?

No, I'm Sorry.

I Said,
"After The Film."

Yeah, Just Put Your
Head Down Here.

(Buzzer)

Just A Minute, Please.

Hello.

Yeah, Rudy.

No, Not Now.

You Can't Have Any Ice Cream.

No, You Stay
On The Island, Please!

Yes, Do Your Book.

No Matter What Happens,
Stay On The Island.

Mr. Yamato,
I Was Wondering

Are You Aware That
An Awful Lot Of Fathers

Do Mental Coaching?

Mental Coaching?

From The Lobby.

You See, There Are Many Husbands
Who Stay In The Lobby

And They Mentally Coach
Their Wives From Back There

While Their Wives Are In The
Delivery Room Having Labor.

Labor?

Labor... Whoa.

I'm Sorry.
I Didn't Say "Film."

Film?

"And The Baby Bear Said:

"'Somebody Has Been Eating My
Porridge And It's All Gone.'

Big Papa Bear Said,
'Somebody Has...'"

Hi, Rudy.

Mommy!

How Are You Feeling?

Fine.

Give Me A Kiss?

Did Your Daddy
Give You Aspirin?

Yes.

Did He Do
The Airplane?

He Did Everything.

Howdy, Partner!

I Don't Know That
Yet, Cliff.

What Did He Say?

Everything.

He Talked And Talked
Until He Fell Asleep.

What Did You Do?

I Started To Wake Him Up,
But That Didn't Seem Right.

So I Left Because
Rudy Was Home Alone.

Are You Kidding?
She's Not Home Alone.

The Child Is Just
Above My Office.

I Did Everything You Asked.

I Know You Did Everything,
But I Wanted It Done By Me.

We're Going Up To Your Room.

Say Good-Bye To Your Island.

Bye, Fishies.

What About The Partnership?

(Ring)

Dr. Huxtable.

Mr. Auerbach?

Yeah.

Huh?

She Is?

Who?

Okay, Put Him On.

Mr. Halifax?

How Are You, Sir?

This Is Dr. Huxtable.

Well, She's... What?

No, I've Not Been
To That Restaurant.

Thin Slice Of Veal,
Potato And A Martini.

No, I Think He Was
Way Before My Wife's Time.

Yeah, I'll Let You
Talk To Her Right Now.

Sir?

Yeah, Bow Ties
Are Wonderful.

You're A Partner,
You're A Partner.

You're A Partner.

And I'm Taking The Partner Out,
And We're Going To Celebrate.

No, You Are Not.

Because The Partner
Is Taking You Out.

And We're Going To Celebrate
With Dinner And Dancing.

All Right, Miss Money.

What About Tito Puente?

You Got It.

We'll See Him.

Let's Tell
The Children!

Uh-Huh.