02x12 - The Return of Auntie V

[bunniefuu]

Hi, Ungawa. Long time no see.

How come daddy keeps sending

these presents in the basement?

Ah, well, it's a fertility God,

and it's something

our father's never

really needed.

Well, we better move him

upstairs

before Auntie V gets here.

Oh, darn it!

Nicky, can I have

that flashlight?

We're all gonna freeze to death

if I don't get this lit.

What's a fertility God

for anyway?

Uh, it's something that helps

people have children.

Geez, you better stay

in the basement.

Eight is enough.

[chuckles]

[theme music]

[music continues]

[instrumental music]

What's going on around here?

Why is your dad home already?

- Auntie V is in town.

- Yeah, she's good at..

- The famous Auntie V?

- The one and only.

Good.

- Hello.

- Hi.

- Hey, Auntie V is coming.

- Yeah, so I hear.

- Isn't that fantastic.

- Yeah, it's great.

Hey, Abby, I really like

your furniture

but it sort of gives

the-the room

a kind of overcrowded look,

don't you think?

Well, it's our furniture now

and I would say

the word is cozy.

[whispering]

Cozy.

- Hiya.

- Oh, hi, Abby.

Hey, dad's home,

he has a surprise for--

Yeah, I heard his sister

Vivian's here.

Is there anything I can do?

No, no, no, we got it

all under control

at least till she comes.

Yeah, you know

she's staying at a hotel

she didn't want to interfere.

Oh-ho, that will be the day.

Remember last time she was here?

She had you going off with

a group of traveling actors.

Would she had you jumping out

of an airplane--

And, uh, what was it?

David, to be an architect?

- Yeah.

- All that in one visit?

- Oh.

- Well, she couldn't stay long.

You'll absolutely adore her.

Oh, no, Joannie, the dispenser

will blow up again. Oh.

Then feed it some more garbage.

Okay, okay.

Oh, somebody help me, darn it.

Well, don't you squeeze

the tomatoes all over the place.

- Hi, David.

- Hi, Abby.

You smell marvelous.

[sniffing]

- What is that?

- It's, uh, after shave lotion.

- It's called Mucho Macho.

- Uh-huh, let me guess.

- It's a present from Auntie V.

- Right, how did you know?

Little bird told me.

Tell me, is Auntie V as truly

amazing as her legend?

More.

- Do you think we'll hit it off?

- Oh, sure.

I mean, she's a little flaky,

but, uh, she has a warm heart.

So do you.

Oh, David, I'm glad you're here.

The disposal's flipped out

again.

This is where I came in.

Hey, wait, I don't generally

make house call.

- David, please.

- Alright.

- Don't panic, wait, wait, wait.

- Wait a minute.

Hurry!

Now the trick

is to be scientific.

[machine whirring]

Hyah!

I'll send you my bill.

Hey, Abby,

did you hear the news?

Yeah, Thomas,

yeah, I heard something unusual

is going on around here.

I hope your sister

lets me in on her secret.

Oh, what secret?

How do you get so much activity

on a teenager.

[car horn honking]

Oh, my gosh!

Oh, she's here.

J-just don't worry

about a thing.

Just be yourself. Relax.

You look great, you are great.

Now calm and cool.

That's the way to go.

[gasps]

Oh, Ungawa. Ah!

Ungawa.

Cool, cool.

[bell dings]

[indistinct chattering]

[exclaiming]

Oh, hey.

[indistinct chattering]

[all shouting]

Oh, Nicholas, you're gorgeous.

'Tommy.'

(Nicholas)

'Dad?'

- Tommy, where are you?

- Dad.

Hey, ah, you look wonderful.

Oh, Tommy Bellybutton.

You lover, you.

Oh, this must be Abby.

Wait, oh, she is prettier

than you said she was.

Oh, my God.

I mean, look at you.

Oh, she's better than

any of you deserve.

You are a Bradford!

Well, that's what it says

on the marriage license.

Don't believe everything you

read on the marriage license.

- I never did.

- That's what I heard.

Oh, well, don't believe

everything you hear, either.

- What did you tell her, huh?

- Oh, listen..

I want to celebrate.

I want to buy

my two favorite women a drink.

Best offer I've had all day.

Let's go, come on.

- Tommy Bellybutton?

- Oh, please don't ask.

[laughing]

So I said to Horst, "If you

wanna spend most of your time

"with your cars and

the Grand Prix Circuit

"then I have got to find

something to do

even if I had to go to work

to do it."

You're going to go to work?

(Auntie V)

'Don't laugh,

I'm very good at my job.'

Oh, what is your job?

I am the cruise director

on the most gorgeous

ocean liner afloat.

You call that work?

Well, most of my salary

goes for charity

but I'm doing something

and I love it.

'Captain's an old friend of

mine, the crew is French.'

'I mean, what more can I say?

Exotic locales.'

'The world is our playground.'

'We got to the South Seas'

'the Mediterranean,

South America.'

Even Africa?

Deepest, darkest Africa,

Nicholas.

As a matter of fact,

that's where I found

'Ungawa, the fertility God.'

'I was going up the Congo in

a canoe and I stumbled on him'

'in a native village.'

'I knew you'd adore him.'

Oh, he's fine.

I just hope he doesn't work.

Now, I have to find the perfect

wedding gift for you.

Excuse me, uh,

Joannie's put dinner on.

Uh, I'm hungry.

- Nicholas, would you escort me?

- Huh?

Don't worry, darling.

It doesn't hurt.

Here, love.

Okay.

[indistinct]

[dramatic music]

May the force be with you.

[laughing]

You think Nicholas will like it?

You'll never be able to

get him out of it.

Where did get that?

[sighs]

- What's that?

- Oh.

- Oh, college catalogue, huh?

- Yeah.

I never could make any sense

out of those things.

Well, I think you have to

be a genius

to figure one of these

things out.

They are very badly written.

Now, why are you wasting

your time?

I don't know.

Do you know that to take

the interior decorating classes

I want

I have to take English,

philosophy, history and math?

Well, all I know is that

my real education came

from interesting people

and going to exciting places.

I mean, seeing them,

not reading about them.

Horst reads.

I wish I could travel, Auntie V.

Now, why didn't

I think of that myself?

Why, of course

you will be wasted

in a community college

in Sacramento.

The world is your campus.

I am going to take you

on my next cruise.

Oh, Auntie V, I would love it.

(Auntie V)

'And of course the cruise

would be a marvelous'

'experience for any young lady'

'but especially one

as attractive as Nancy.'

She'll be the toast of the

Riviera, the bell of the Baltic.

Well, you just talked me

out of it.

Would you pass the rolls,

please?

It's the opportunity

of a lifetime.

You wouldn't dare say no.

No, please pass the rolls.

Well...I'm sure you know

what you're doing

but after all

it is only eight weeks.

College will be here

when she gets back.

It's the ship that won't wait.

Eight weeks, is that all?

Eight weeks wit-with major stops

in all the big ports

and-and side trips to museums,

and-and galleries.

She'll be talking to people

from all over the world.

I mean, she'll be having

dinner with, with professors

and foreign dignitaries.

I mean, she will be getting

a first class liberal education.

Abby?

[clears throat]

How liberal?

I will be with her every moment.

Tom, she'll be with her

every moment.

V, remember how I always said

that you would never get me

to ride my bicycle across

the old railroad trestle?

And you did.

Oh, Tommy,

I knew you wouldn't say no.

Nancy will be so thrilled.

It might be good for her, Abby.

'And while she is away, maybe

we can add on that spare room.'

I have a terrific idea.

Another idea?

[instrumental music]

Okay, everybody out!

(Nicholas)

'Who lives here?'

Someone with

a Swiss bank account.

Somebody who owns a Swiss bank.

Yeah, we brought our suits

like you said, Auntie V.

- Where's the pool?

- Yeah, and the tennis courts?

Hey, what's the big surprise?

What's this all about?

Abby, Tom...I finally

found a wedding gift

that expresses my love

and my joy

at you two having found

each other

'and I present it to you

with all my very best wishes.'

Well, how do you like it?

Like it? I didn't see it yet.

(Auntie V)

'Oh, but it's right

in front of you.'

'Your new house.'

Viola!

[laughs]

This isn't fun.

I would say, this house

is making quite a hit.

Well, shall we start

to make some plans?

Oh, why?

Since when have you

ever bothered to

consult us about anything?

Uh, what is all this

supposed to be, anyway?

I told you, Tommy Bellybutton.

It's your wedding present.

Uh, what kind of a thank-you

note are we suppose to send you?

"Dear V,

thank you for the estate.

It really comes in handy.

We use it every day."

- Now you're being ridiculous.

- I'm being ridiculous?

Me? Safe and sane Bradford?

Oh, no, no. I mean, monogram

towels are one thing, V.

We can even squeeze

a fertility God

into our lives if we have to

but I mean, if you think

that I can accept

this-this this plantation

well, then-then you're-you're,

you're even crazier

than I gave you credit for.

- Tom.

- Never mind.

You'll get used to

his little self.

He's just like Horst.

We'll discuss it

after you calm down.

Oh, look, I am calm

and we're not going to discuss

it anymore.

You can't possibly think

that I would accept

an outrageous gift like this.

No, no, no, no.

I know all about

your stubborn pride,

little brother.

I knew you wouldn't accept

the whole package.

Oh, well, good.

Then that settles that.

Oh, I was afraid that you..

That's why I agreed only to

a substantial down payment.

(Tom)

Huh.

Of course,

I'll guarantee the loan.

- The rest is up to you.

- Huh?

It goes for me too, huh?

Now, wait a minute, V, please.

You've done some pretty

high-handed things in your life

but pushing me into bankruptcy,

that would really take the cake.

V, this is a wonderful

fabulous,

incredible wedding gift

but we couldn't possibly

accept it.

It's much too much.

[sighs]

Well, I-I..

I guess I was being high-handed.

It's just that

I wanted you two to know

how happy I am

that you two found each other.

I wanted to give you something

that would make it

easier on you.

You're the only real family

I've ever had.

I mean, it-it isn't

as if I can't afford this.

I have money of my own,

investment, real estates.

What have you?

One day, it'll all go to you

and the children.

What's mine is yours.

I guess I was being selfish.

I just wanted to be around

to watch you enjoy

even a part of it.

Oh, hey, listen,

I appreciate it so much.

Just that it came in too much

of a surprise, all this.

- It's a big surprise, V.

- Oh, I understand.

I guess I shouldn't have

expected you to say...yes.

I just wish you hadn't said no

so quickly.

Well, we should think about it,

you know, give-give

give a little time.

That's all I ask.

Alright, I mean, thinking is

the one thing I can afford.

Oh.

- 'V, where you at?'

- He remembered.

Oh, you will love him.

He's our realtor.

Our realtor?

What's her is ours.

- Nancy, help.

- Unh-unh.

I love a man who takes

instruction up to a point.

Abby, Tom

I'd like to have you meet

Morgan Ames.

- How do you do, Abby?

- Nice to meet you.

Mr. Bradford.

Your sister is

a very decisive woman

once she makes up her mind.

Oh, Morgan helped us

find this house.

Well, shall we go outside

and chat?

- Come on.

- Sure.

We, uh, enjoy reading

your column

very much, Mr. Bradford.

I think you will have fun

writing it up

in that study, upstairs.

Who knows what brilliance

it will inspire.

It will have to inspire

a bestseller

to pay for all this.

Oh, don't be mislead,

Mrs. Bradford.

I've driven by your home

you'd be amazed at the price

we could get for it.

No less than triple

of what you paid.

Oh, I'm glad you didn't see

the inside of it.

[laughing]

It's a seller's market.

Oh, but we'd be buyers here,

right?

That's right, and you'd be

reinvesting all your big profits

into a solid buy,

that would increase

in value even before

it cleared escrow.

And the kicker is

you'd be getting

a tax break at the same time.

Oh, I suppose next

you'll be telling me that

I'm losing money

if I don't buy this place.

You read my mind.

[sighs]

Auntie V?

Where can I find the nearest

supply of, uh, drinking water

around here?

Well, I, uh, I think Morgan

has some soft drinks for us.

As a matter of fact, I could use

a hand setting up this lunch.

Well, okay.

They look cute.

- I hate cute.

- Oh.

I'm glad you sister promised

not to interfere.

I'd hate to see her

when she was trying to.

- Hey, dad.

- Hey, where have you been?

- Lost.

- Lost?

Nicholas, this is a strange

neighborhood, don't wander off.

Who wandered off?

I got lost in the house.

- Anyway, cute.

- He's cute.

Mr. Ames is gonna

serve us lunch.

Okay, but first

I'm going swimming.

- Bye.

- Oh, boy.

It's gonna be awfully hard

to say no.

(Morgan)

'Well, Tom, if you have

any further questions'

'these things will give you

the answer.'

'This independent study shows

how to get maximum profit'

'if you sell this house

right now.'

'And this is the proof'

'that the equity buildup

in your new home'

'will far outstrip

your present equity situation.'

So I would say that all this

pretty well proves my point.

Yeah, it proves something.

I thought you'd see it that way.

It proves that

I don't understand

half of what you're saying.

Hi.

I didn't know we had,

uh, company.

(man on recorder)

Appelez-moi un taxi.

Call me a taxi.

You speak French?

Not bad for a taxi.

Well, I spent a year in Paris.

I think I'm jealous.

I'm trying to learn it

for my European cruise

I'm planning on taking.

Oh, I'd love to help you,

but, uh

I'm little tied up with

your father right now.

Oh, hey, no,

don't let my dull sense

of high finance

stand in your way.

Why don't you and Nancy

take off for a few minutes

it will give me a chance

to go over your

independent survey,

it's a good idea.

I can do better than that, Tom.

Why don't I leave these figures

with you, and then when Abby

gets home from her meeting,

you can go over them with her.

Good.

- Mademoiselle.

- Monsieur.

V, explain something to me.

Morgan just demonstrated

how rich I am.

How come I feel so broke?

No need to fret about that now.

You know what a good deal it is.

In some ways, maybe.

You see, I lied to Morgan.

I know a lot more about

real estate that I led on

and frankly it's, uh,

it's not that bad a deal.

You just can't make

a big move like that

over dollars and cents.

Tom..

...Abby is a very brave woman.

She never complains about

having to put up with all this.

The crowding, the inconvenience.

We-we've managed so far.

But how long could it last?

Listen, little brother..

...Abby shouldn't have

to live with a memory..

...and neither should you,

and neither should the children.

I love you, love you.

Mwah, mwah.

I know.

[instrumental music]

- Oh, hi.

- Hi.

I didn't do a very good job

of waiting up for you.

These teacher union elections

always run late.

Hmm, who won?

- Anyone who didn't get elected.

- Hmm.

So how was your meeting

with Morgan Ames?

Oh, yeah, him.

Well, the way he explains is,

we-we would be worth more

in debt than out of it.

Well, that's an old

American tradition.

- Abby.

- Yeah?

What do you think if we did

close the door on this place?

I mean, you know, we wouldn't

be on top of each other anymore.

Wouldn't have to keep

separating Tommy and Nicholas

from fighting over

who's gonna clean the room.

Every time I turn around,

something else is broken.

If it isn't the furnace,

it's the plumbing.

I don't know the last time

I took a shower

without the water tuning

ice cold

right in the middle of it.

There's a lot of history

in this old house.

- Yeah.

- Yeah.

But what about the future?

I mean, like Vivian says

it would be a fresh start

for us.

What do you think?

I think we should put it

to a vote.

[instrumental music]

There it is, everybody.

'The first step

to a fresh start.'

(man on recorder)

'Where is the post office?'

Ou est le bureau de poste?

Ou est le bureau de poste?

(man on recorder)

I would like

a room with a bath.

Je voudrais une chambre

avec une salle de bain.

(Nancy)

Je, je voudrais une chambre

avec..

[Nancy sighs]

Avec a bathroom.

(man on recorder)

Is there a drugstore

in the neighborhood?

Y at-il une pharmacie

dans le quartier?

(Nancy)

Y at-il une pharmacie

dans le quartier?

(man on recorder)

Would you direct me

to the nearest subway stop?

Voulez-vous me diriger

du metro le plus proche?

(Nancy)

Huh? Would you repeat that?

(man on recorder)

Where is the Arch of Triumph?

Ou est l'Arc de Triomphe?

(Nancy)

Ou est l'Arc de Triomphe?

(Nancy)

What about discotheques?

(man on record)

How much is a round trip

ticket to Marseille?

Combien coute un voyage

aller-retour

billet pour Marseille?

(Nancy)

Combien coute un voyage

aller-retour..

...a round trip, uh, billet..

'Oh, who wants to go

to Marseille anyway?'

(man on recorder)

'What time is it?'

Quelle heure est-il?

Est-il, est-il..

(Nancy)

'It's o'clock.

That's what time it is.'

(Nicholas)

Gee, it really looks good.

Well, it's an open

house, Nicholas.

It's supposed to look good.

We should have one

of these every Sunday.

Yeah.

See you later.

I really appreciate

you sticking around

and helping

with all these, Nancy.

Oh, Morgan,

I don't mind at all.

Besides, you can help me

with my French.

Avec plaisir, mademoiselle.

[clears throat]

'I have some shopping to do.'

Is it safe

to leave you two alone?

Yeah, I think so.

Bye.

(Morgan)

'Thanks for stopping by.'

'Listen, if you want

to see the house again'

'please give me a call, okay?'

[door closes]

- Looky-loos.

- Oh.

Just curious.

Where were we?

Oh, um, the-the hair.

Uh-huh.

Les cheveux.

[speaking in French]

[chuckles]

Le nez.

Les levres.

Tres bien.

[doorbell dings]

Probably, uh, more looky-loos.

Don't go away, okay?

I won't.

[sighs]

Oh, boy.

(Morgan)

'Well, a year in Paris

did do wonders for my French.'

- Anything happened?

- Huh?

Uh, if you mean,

did we sell the house?

'No, Nicholas, we didn't'

but we might have

a few hot prospects

so I'd appreciate it

if you'd be ready

to show the house

in a moment's notice.

(Tom)

'Sure, would it be alright

for us to have dinner?'

Oh, sure, sure.

Just don't mess up

the kitchen, okay?

Would you like to help me

take those signs down outside?

Oh, oui, oui. Avec plaisir.

- Plaisir.

- Plaisir.

(Tom)

'Coming, Abby?'

Oh, yeah, yeah.

Don't spoil your dinner,

Nicholas.

We're having Quiche Lorraine.

We usually have hamburgers

on Wednesday night

but that's when Elizabeth cook.

That's the only thing

she can cook.

Well, you usually

eat about :.

Yeah, you probably

gonna put ketchup

all over this quiche, huh?

Or squeeze his mustard.

Yeah.

- Hello?

- How much pepper?

Um..

O-okay, I'll tell them.

Hey, you guys,

that was Morgan Ames

and he's bringing some people

over in about ten minutes.

Morgan Ames? Battle stations!

[clamoring]

Okay, you go upstairs,

tell Nancy

she's in the bath, alright?

Go get her.

- No way, that's her problem.

- Oh, now, move it. Come on.

[clamoring]

Nicholas, we're supposed to be

straightening this place up.

These are straight, see?

Get out of here, Elizabeth.

I just wanted

to tell you something.

(Nancy)

Out! Out!

Can't a person have any privacy

around here?

I wish somebody

would fix the lock.

'I was here first.'

You want privacy?

Okay, have your privacy.

[door closes]

[instrumental music]

Whoa, look at that.

'Gosh, the Circuit Breakers

are coming to see our house?'

'I don't believe it.'

Who are the Circuit Breakers?

I mean, I mean, what are they?

They-they are local

rock group, Auntie V.

'They made it big

in their first record.'

- Wooh!

- Punk rock and they stink.

Wooh, their driver doesn't.

They're coming.

[knock on door]

[doorbell ringing]

- Hello, Mary.

- Hello there.

Well, here we are, uh,

please feel free to look around.

Uh, ask questions. It's a very

good buy, I assure you.

- Well, it's basic American.

- Mm-hmm.

It's very good. Very good.

You see, Mr. Ames,

the Circuit Breakers

were created by a computer.

'It indicates that they require

an average-type ambiance'

'so that they can really

use their music as a release.'

Do you follow?

Oh, of course, of course.

Well, um, this is certainly

average ambiance.

Um, extremely average.

Please, feel free

to look around.

Ask questions.

Alright.

Hey, old buddy, how's it going?

- Hi.

- No, just a little buzz.

Oh, I was sure

that the little homemaker

would be interested

in the kitchen.

I drive.

Does this thing make brownies?

- Yeah.

- Yes, sure.

Is that you again, Elizabeth?

Oh, no, I'm Mac.

Uh, Elizabeth played bass,

but he got busted in Fresno.

You come with the house?

Oh.

[door closes]

Oh, oh.

Acoustic's okay.

'Rehearsal rooms'

'groupie quarters'

an office with a computer.

I think that'll do it, Mr. Ames.

Let's talk turkey, outside.

- Fine, fine.

- Good.

[snaps finger]

[whistles]

[instrumental music]

Stay cool, fella. Okay?

Ungawa say, "You know it, man."

[laughing]

We have some hot prospects here.

I wondered who they were.

Yeah, if you two wanna go inside

I'll speak to them.

- In what language?

- I don't know.

[music continues]

[no audio]

[no audio]

[music continues]

[music continues]

Alright now, men,

here take these boxes

and put them out by the curb.

The salvation army

will be along any minute.

And don't bring anything back.

Uh, dad, why is it that you get

to keep that weird-looking hat

and we have to get rid

of everything?

Huh, weird-looking hat?

This is my favorite hunting cap.

Actually, what I mean is I've

been hunting for over years.

Alright, come on. Out, out.

Come on, let's go.

Alright, mush, men. Mush, mush.

'Oh, Abby.'

Hey, look at this.

Remember?

You sent it to me when

I was about three years old.

I was in New York.

Boy, I loved this wagon.

Then Tommy had it.

Nicholas lost the wheel.

I know.

These old photographs,

they are very special.

It's hard to turn your back

on the past.

David...you don't seem

as excited

as everyone else

is about moving.

[chuckles]

Yeah, well, it's...purely

selfish, I suppose.

See, when I drop in here,

it's coming home.

Visiting that other place

will be..

I don't know.

Will be visiting

dad's new house.

Maybe somebody can find

another wheel for this thing.

[instrumental music]

Oh, gosh.

[crickets chirping]

Somebody's in the bathroom.

[sighs]

I can't sleep.

Hmm.

This old house talks to me.

Probably knows we're moving.

Yeah.

Can't worry about

how the house feels.

We're doing the right thing.

[creaking]

I hope that's Nancy.

That second step

always did creak.

[music continues]

Don't worry, guys.

You're gonna like the new place.

Really, you might even get

your own room and everything.

Nicholas, why don't you cool it?

We've got an early day tomorrow,

okay?

Okay. And don't worry, I'll come

and visit you everyday.

[music continues]

You awake?

Yeah.

Morgan, wait, please.

Nancy..

...tomorrow is a big day

for both of us.

Morgan..

...I don't wanna leave you.

Oh, Nancy..

...you're so sweet

and beautiful

but what about your cruise?

Who cares about the cruise?

You mean, you're gonna

pass up that trip?

But why?

'Cause you're more important

to me.

What's the matter, Morgan?

- Nancy, uh--

- D-don't you want me to stay?

I didn't wanna

have to tell you this.

I mean..

I thought you're going away.

You know, life goes on.

Nancy, I'm engaged.

You're what?

I-I didn't mean to

keep it from you

but it-it just..

Nobody asked, and..

...I figured

it was harmless enough.

I mean, my fiancee's been

out of town

for almost a month now.

Well, I see.

You mean, I just happened

to be handy and easy.

- Is that it, Morgan?

- No, no, no. No, Nancy.

I really do care for you

but I just didn't think

that you were gonna get serious.

You're a cheater.

Morgan...I feel sorry

for your fiancee.

Hi, how are you?

Now, yeah, okay.

Oh, no, watch that china.

Uh, that's, uh..

Hi, hello..

Well, here I am, what can I do?

Oh, hey, V. Hi.

Well, gee, I don't know, really.

What we're doing is we're taking

our personal clothing

and all the personal things

and we're moving them

in David's van to save

the time and money

with the-the movers.

- Hi, Auntie V.

- Watch it with the gold fish.

They'll drown.

Oh, they can't drown.

Oh, boy, what a day this is,

I tell ya.

Oh, listen, would you

do me a fav.. Hi.

V, go in there

and tell Nicholas

to get off the telephone

and get up in his room

and get everything out

of the room.

Right, now for a minute there,

you sounded just like Horst.

- Oh, yeah, of course.

- Hi, Auntie V.

- Hi, honey.

- Hi, that's..

You know who she is.

Now, listen, N-Nancy wants

to talk to you

and she wouldn't talk

to anybody else.

Right, right. Now, wait. now.

First, Nicholas

then Nancy, right?

Yes, okay.

Oh, it's so nerve-racking.

Oh, no, no, no. He stays.

Oh, excuse me. She stays.

(Nicholas)

'Yeah, Freddie, I know.'

'But if you wanted me to come

over to your house after school'

I'd have to turn my back

and get home in time for dinner.

Yeah, yeah, that's right.

That's three different buses

and two transfers.

Fifty cents a day.

Well, it's not my idea to move.

Okay, goodbye, Freddie.

[instrumental music]

Hi, Nicholas.

I know it's not easy

to move away

and leave old friends

but you'll make new ones

in no time.

Not like Freddie Ryan.

He's the best friend

a guy can ever have.

Auntie V, Auntie V,

your Horst is here.

My Horst?

Yeah, some guy gets out

of a super fast car

and says to me,

"You will tell Vivian

that her Horst is here."

(Auntie V)

'My Horst?'

My Horst?

So he has come to apologize,

has he?

Well, it is too late because

I am an independent woman.

Horst Von Manfred, go away.

You will come with me now?

I will not come with you now

or ever.

You are a, a German

high-handed potatohead.

Ya?

You're my wife, you will come.

Not as long as you care

about your stupid cars

more than you care about me.

I've sold them all.

'I'm delivering this one

to Marvin.'

Have a nice trip, Horst, alone.

'I am sailing a week

from Wednesday, alone.'

Nein!

You are no longer

cruise director.

You have been dismissed.

Oh, and by whose order?

Mine.

'I am the managing director

of your cruise line.'

Oh!

I bought it!

Ich liebe dich.

I love you!

Horst!

Horst.

[instrumental music]

You bought the cruise line?

You are a stupid..

...romantic fool.

[cheering]

Hey!

What's the matter?

I feel so humiliated, Auntie V.

I really thought I loved Morgan

but he was only using me.

Morgan Ames is engaged.

Oh, Nancy, I am so sorry.

I had no idea.

That cad!

I wonder if Horst brought

his dueling pistols.

Please, Auntie V,

can't we leave today?

Of course we can leave to..

Oh, Nancy, I..

I am really very, very sorry

'but I have some rather

bad news for you.'

I've been fired.

You've been fired? By who?

By my Horst.

He is the new owner

of the cruise line, we..

We won't be going--

But I can't stay here!

- I've gotta leave.

- No, Nancy! Please.

Please, now, just listen to me.

Nancy..

...well, I guess Abby was right.

You...you are young and,

and thank God you are.

I mean, you'll get over this

in no time.

Oh, believe me, I've been

through this more times

than I care to recall.

We're not talking about you,

Auntie V.

We're talking about me.

Nancy, wait..

Na..

Oh.

Nancy, Nancy,

please listen to me.

I've already done that

and look where it's got me.

Alright, I was wrong.

I was thinking of myself at

at your age, not, not you.

Nancy, you need more time

to-to grow up, to mature

and you can do that at college,

and-and live right here at home.

Home isn't here anymore,

Auntie V.

Take a look! You've fixed that.

You and Abby.

Me?

Hey, Nancy, wait a minute.

Let's not set me up

as a scapegoat, okay?

- Nancy?

- Wait, Thomas.

I'll handle this right now.

Nancy?

I love this house.

This place was you.

It was all of you and,

and what you've been, but, uh..

Hey, I can live with the past.

And I thought

I was doing pretty well too.

Tom..

...the only reason I wanted

to move was for your sake

and, and well, the-the pain this

place seem to cause you

'and, and your children.'

They've got everything

out of the garage.

- What goes?

- Hold it, David.

But I thought that it was you

that wanted a fresh start.

What? Getting married

was our fresh start, wasn't it?

Uh, I mean, if we can't live

with our memories here

we're not gonna be able to do it

anyplace else.

Tom, I never wanted to move.

Neither did I.

Yeah, I spent all last night

crying myself to sleep

'cause we're leaving

this old house.

Well, I guess we'll just have

to built a pool right here,

huh, dad?

How did all of this get started?

Auntie V and

that creep, Morgan Ames.

Oh, now he's a creep.

What is going on?

I don't wanna talk about it.

What do you care anyway?

You're going on

some fancy cruise.

I am not going on a cruise,

Elizabeth

and I don't wanna talk about

that either.

Hey, Nancy, whatever happened,

it's all gonna work out, honest.

Listen, uh, will someone please

tell me what what's going on

around here?

Can't you see, dad?

Nobody wants to move.

'It's as simple as that.'

- That simple?

- Oh!

Well, I mean if nobody

wants to move, then..

Well, then we won't move.

I don't know how we're gonna

undo everything that we did

but that's exactly

what we'll do.

Well, isn't it too late

for that?

Yeah, dad what about

the Circuit Breaker?

[indistinct chattering]

(Horst)

'Silence!'

Danke sehr.

My beloved wife

wishes to make a statement.

[instrumental music]

Well..

...it looks like

I've done it again.

'I really didn't mean to

interfere this time.'

I just, uh..

[sniffles]

I just love you all...very much.

[sighs]

You should have memories, and

for all of you, they're here.

And here they'll stay.

Now, don't worry about

the movers, we'll talk to them

and I'll take care

of Morgan Ames.

Oh, will I take care

of Morgan Ames.

- Now, Horst.

- Okay.

Alright, gentlemen,

you may begin.

[cheering]

[instrumental music]

Be it ever so humble.

And cold again

with the furnace out.

Hmm, don't worry,

we're gonna get a new one.

And a new pool.

Yeah, I've got a friend

who has a bulldozer.

Really?

You know what,

we can get Vivian to work it.

[laughing]

She just wants what's best

for you, Tommy Bellybutton.

Oh, don't start that.

I can't stand it.

It's so embarrassing.

Isn't it romantic to see

Horst and Auntie V riding off

into the sunset?

Yeah, that car was great.

Well, I'm gonna miss her.

This may sound crazy,

but I'm gonna miss her too.

Nicolas, where have you been?

Over at Freddy Ryan's.

Their furnace works.

What should I do with this?

I found it outside.

Oh, the sold sign.

I know what to do with this.

Follow me.

[fire crackling]

[music continues]

[theme music]