02x18 - Dear Miss Dinah

[bunniefuu]

[instrumental music]

Was that Abby's car?

Huh?

Oh.

No, no, I was just, uh..

Somebody else driving by.

I have to ask Abby

something important.

Well, why don't you ask me?

After all, I'm your father.

Who better to ask

than your own father?

Go ahead, ask.

Okay.

Remember this morning

at breakfast

that history question

that I asked Abby, who he was?

Who who was?

Who who was what?

What you wanted to know?

I wanted to know who, not what.

Who what?

- Who he was?

- Who who was?

Who who was what?

Oh, come on, Nicholas

this is no time to start playing

"Who's On First?"

No, dad, who's on second?

What's on first?

Get to bed.

Yes, sir.

[instrumental music]

Gotta keep an eye on that kid.

[theme music]

[music continues]

[music continues]

[dramatic music]

Good morning, Mrs. Bradford.

Goodbye, Mrs. Bradford.

Stop. Tom, wait.

Oh, no, no, I can't wait.

I've to get to the office early.

I have a special project.

Early? Early, what time is it?

Oh, no. No, I'm late.

Do you think that maybe you're

burning the candle at both ends?

Oh, no, my being this busy

is not that usual.

It'll all let up.

(Tom)

'Yeah.'

Maybe you should have

started last night.

That little ring

around your finger

could act as a homing device.

You know a husband

with eight children.

Oh, Tom,

you're absolutely right.

But it's not that simple, I mean

PhDs aren't that easy to come by

I mean especially part-time.

'And when you work

part-time too'

'well, we've talked about it.'

I know, I know,

and I wanna be fair about it.

It's just that..

Well, maybe you..

...might need some help

in the kitchen

the kids could handle it.

Oh, no, no, no, no.

Remember my homing device.

You didn't do the shopping.

You're right.

I didn't do the shopping.

I'm sorry, I just clean forgot.

You know

I had the list in my purse

and I just..

I forgot but I'm,

I'll do it today, I promise.

I cross my heart

and I hope to starve.

Mm-hmm.

Now I remember why we're here.

Hm, give the lady a break, okay?

Yeah, listen,

what was that question

that Nicholas asked you

yesterday morning?

You know, kid number eight.

Kid number eight.

Oh, I should have

known it right away.

It just slipped my mind,

yeah, but I did look it up.

And the answer is..

John Quincy Adams that's who.

Thanks, dad.

- That's who what?

- Who he was.

- Who who was?

- Oh, please, Nancy.

I'd love to play the game

a second time.

But I'm late for work.

'What's for breakfast?'

No, dad, what's on second?

There's practically,

nothing for breakfast, dad.

We're almost out of cereal

and milk.

And only three eggs.

Yeah, if Abby doesn't

go the supermarket pretty soon

I'm gonna have to go next door

and borrow a cup of dinner.

Come on,

let's give the lady a break.

I mean PhDs

are not that easy to come by.

Especially part-time.

And when you're working

part-time on top of that..

Well, the family has discussed

it before.

[all murmuring]

Oh, Mary, please

go borrow a cup of coffee.

Nicholas, who who was?

[chuckles]

[knock on door]

Oh, uh, come in

- Morning.

- 'Hi, Elizabeth.'

Can I talk to you a second?

(Abby)

'Well, yeah.'

I mean it'll have to be

in-in short hand.

I mean, say seconds.

See, I-I stayed up

late last night.

Ironing your father's shirts

and, uh...I overslept.

But it's pretty important, Abby.

Oh, oh, well, uh,

in that case, uh..

Well, can we talk later?

'I shouldn't be too late.'

Sure. Okay.

But it's good,

that is good, because, uh

I'll come back here

before my evening class

and then, uh, we'll talk then.

Scout's honor.

'Is there any hot water left?'

I doubt it.

Gotta be fast around here.

[shuts door]

Huh-oh. Where's Abby?

She's in the shower.

Good. Shh!

(Elizabeth)

'What are you doing?'

Shh!

(Elizabeth)

'What are you doing?'

I'm taking these shirts

to the laundry.

Uh, didn't Abby already do it?

Yeah, that's the problem.

I have to get them de-starched.

You see Abby tries very hard.

But sometimes

she tries too hard.

- Feel that.

- I did.

You don't say

anything to anybody.

I don't wanna hurt her feelings.

Quiet!

Oh, Mary, listen.

Do me a favor.

Smuggle these to the laundry

on your way to school.

- But, dad, I--

- No, no, no.

Elizabeth will explain.

I'm late, I have to go.

Oh, and be careful.

Don't cut yourself on the edges

they're very sharp.

Don't ask.

- He's just being cute.

- I won't, I won't.

[imitating car revving]

I got it, dad.

I'll back it out.

[tires squealing]

Listen, you didn't learn that

in driver's training.

Where do you think you are,

Indy?

Oh, dad, you know

what this car could really use?

- A four barrel carb--

- Yeah, sure and headers too.

Goodbye. Thanks a lot.

Oh, dad, dad,

I was just trying to help.

Pfft!

(female #)

'Yeah, and they did too.'

Well, anyway,

when her parents found out

they went wild,

do you think it was s.

Well, I just told my mom,

not to hassle me.

She knows,

she's seen 'em in my room.

But, uh, we just don't talk

about it.

It's a good idea.

How about you,

do your parents hassle you?

About what?

About what? About the pill.

The pill?

Uh, no, nobody hassles me.

What for?

You know, I'm my own person.

I mean, why even discuss it?

Oh, I see.

Ronnie!

Hello, little girl.

Oh, come on, Ronnie, cut it out.

Why do you always call me that?

Because it's cute.

'Cause it fits.

I don't know

what do you want me

to call you, little woman?

You're impossible.

Oh, um...here's the cassette.

You said you didn't have.

Outta' sight.

You wanna hear it on my stereo?

I'll think about it.

Heavy.

[instrumental music]

- 'Good morning, sir.'

- Good morning.

- Calls?

- Not yet, sir.

Coffee.

No.

I wasn't giving

an observation, Donna.

I was giving an order.

You know, Mr. Bradford,

I've been getting

your coffee for you for

quite a few years now, right?

Well, I-I no longer feel that

sexist coffee making

is a part of my job.

Because I was hired

as a secretary, not a waitress.

You're absolutely right, Donna.

And if you would like to remain

in that capacity

you would do

very well to appease

my chauvinistic priorities

by bringing me some coffee!

Okay. Yes, sir.

Whatever happened

to bra burning?

It was so much more meaningful.

Tom, Tom.

Please, no Indian music.

It's a bad morning.

Would you like Donna

to get you some coffee?

Oh, uh, no, no.

I'm used to getting my own.

Uh, Tom, I gotta talk to you.

Oh, I can't this morning.

I have a meeting,

a special project.

You know, uh,

I'm your special project.

Mm, what are you talking about?

You're the special project?

Why are you dressed

that funny way?

Oh, well, that's the point see.

Uh, the point is

I'm going on vacation.

'I knew you wouldn't

be happy, Tom.'

It wasn't my idea.

Upstairs, huh.

You're my replacement.

What?

What do you mean?

You mean I'm Dear Miss Dinah?

[chuckling]

Miss Dinah?

How about some coffee, ma'am?

Well, I-I, this is ridiculous.

I mean, I have

a column to write.

I don't know how to give advice.

You've got eight children.

You're married, see.

I'm alone and I do it.

'Now, one suggestion though.'

Don't push anybody

over the edge.

Over the edge?

Now, look, Folly, I don't

want this responsibility.

Oh, come on.

I haven't lost one yet.

[chuckles]

I had some close calls though.

'You'll be fine, Tom.'

Hey, I'll bring you some fish.

If I catch one.

I don't believe this.

Oh, Mr. Bradford, listen

really, I want you to try to

think of this as a challenge.

So, I like to think of it

as a challenge.

I think of it as embarrassing.

Will I have to call you

Miss Dinah, dad?

What is a Miss Dinah dad?

It's somebody that answers

questions from weirdoes.

- That's not true.

- That is true, dad.

It's real put down to have to

write that kind of stuff.

You know, we all have

each other to talk to

and to listen to

and give advice to.

But there's a lot of people

out there

that are as not

as lucky as we are.

I mean to them, Miss Dinah

is very, uh, real

with very real advice.

Besides it's by rotation.

I was next on the list.

[phone ringing]

I'll get it.

[phone ringing]

Hello?

Oh, hi, Abby.

When're you gonna be home?

Oh, okay, here's dad.

Oh, yes, dear.

Oh, that late.

And a film too?

Oh.

Well, alright, I'll see you

when you get here, right.

Bye bye, now.

I'm gonna go to the study.

I have a lot of work to do.

So, please, no noise.

[instrumental music]

No dessert either.

Boy, am I getting

jumpy vibes from you?

Yeah.

Yeah.

Hey, we're more than

just sisters, we're roommates.

If you've got a problem,

Elizabeth, you can tell me.

Well..

It's kind of hard to get into.

You see, uh..

...Abby's not here,

Mary studying and..

...well, Joannie and Susan,

they're busy.

I just happen to be

the only one available, huh?

Thanks a lot, kid.

You really know

how to hurt a guy.

No, no, it's not that.

It's just that, um..

You really are uptight,

aren't you?

What's the matter?

I, um..

Well, I, uh..

I just thought..

I just thought

that maybe I should

start thinking about, um..

Well, about going on the pill.

Oh!

Who is it? Ronnie?

In a way.

I mean not yet.

But you know

I'm not a little girl anymore.

Well, the way you're going

about this thing

sure makes you sound like one.

- Nancy.

- Mm-hmm?

What do you do?

I mean, are you? Have you?

Come on, Elizabeth.

We're not talking about me.

What does my personal life

have to do with you anyway?

Nothing.

It's just that

if you were doing it

then I thought

that maybe you know..

Uh, okay.

Look, Elizabeth

you know the facts of life.

You've seen

the health films at school.

I can't tell you

more than you already know.

So let's just stay clear

of my personal life.

Okay?

Look, don't get all shook up.

You're the one who asked.

Dear Troubled.

Eighteen years of marriage

is not a thing

to be taken lightly.

Trust.

That is the important thing.

Give him a little

breathing space

and you'll both breathe easier.

Okay, Can I help you?

Anything special you wanna know?

Uh, yeah,

can I ask you something?

Sure, you've caught me

at a good time.

Anything, anything at all.

Go ahead.

Well, if almost everybody

was doing something

and you weren't doing it..

...do you think

you'd feel left out?

Oh. Well, I mean that depends.

Well, I mean this thing

that you want to do.

Is this something very important

or is it just a whim or what?

It's pretty important.

Well, uh, why don't you tell me

what it is.

There were never any walls

between us.

Daddy..

...I wanna go on the pill.

[dramatic music]

Y-you want to go

on the pill?

[chuckles]

I see you, uh, um-hmm..

You, uh, and y-you want me

t-to tell you

that it's okay

for you to..

...go on the pill.

- It's not okay.

- What?

Indisputably, indubitably,

irrefragably, it's not okay!

Why do you always use such

big words when you're mad.

Okay, how 'bout a small word?

No!

- But dad--

- I don't wanna discuss it.

Because there's nothing left

to discuss. N-O.

I sure hope

you are a better Miss Dinah

than you are a father.

[instrumental music]

Goodnight, my love.

Oh, goodnight.

- Abby?

- Yeah.

There's something I wanna talk

to you about.

- Oh.

- It's Elizabeth.

Not now. Tomorrow, okay?

[mumbling]

Oh, boy.

Oh, I forgot I have to get up

early in the morning.

I've gotta shop.

[sighs]

I'll call you, alright?

[snoring]

[instrumental music]

[groaning]

Oh!

'Hey, would someone go out

and get the oranges?'

I just dropped all the oranges..

Well, right.

Um, Abby..

Let me help you here.

Here. Oh, they're heavy.

Here, but don't drop..

Wait.

I told you I was gonna shop.

Yeah, well, we're just trying

to help, Abby.

Yeah, we know,

how busy you are.

I had a list in my purse.

Y'all knew that.

(Joannie)

'Yeah, well, we were just

getting kinda low'

'on bread and water, you know?'

It's nothing to be upset

about, Abby?

Yeah, I mean, we didn't know

when you're gonna shop

and kids gotta eat.

(Joannie)

'Yeah.'

Oh, Abby, come on.

Don't worry about it.

Once you come to know us better

you'll find out

we can be pretty

self-sufficient.

I guess you can be.

Um, Abby..

They don't really go in there.

Here.

Why don't you just

let us do it, huh?

- Hey, everyone.

- Hi, David.

- Hi, Abby.

- Hi, David.

(David)

'I noticed on the way in,

you're MG's leaking oil.'

Yeah? Lot or a little?

Uh, more than a little.

I was hoping you guys

could feed me.

I've a late date tonight,

thought I'd grab a bite.

Feed you?

We'll stuff you like a turkey.

(Joannie)

'Sit down, David, there's

plenty. Hey, sit down.'

- Look, what you guys--

- Plenty of bananas.

And a lot of bread.

Did you knock, did you knock

over a supermarket?

(Nancy)

'Uh, you want some milk?'

[indistinct chattering]

[instrumental music]

I suppose I'll have to get you

home by midnight, Cinderella.

I can stay out late

if I want.

You talk to me

like I'm a little girl

and you're only a year

older than me.

A year can make

all the difference.

The difference in what?

When you're older

you won't have to ask.

I still haven't played

the cassette you gave me.

What are you waiting for?

You.

We've still got a date

Friday night, right?

Yeah, sure. I said yes.

Well, maybe we can play

the tape then?

We'll have to hang

around the house.

My parents will be out of town.

Okay. Bye.

[cranks engine]

[instrumental music]

[knocking on door]

Come in.

Oh, hi, Elizabeth.

Have you got a minute?

Oh, sure, sure. Come on in.

- You're not busy?

- No. No, no.

Sit down.

What can I do for you?

Well, I've been wanting

to talk to you.

Mm-hmm.

This isn't easy.

Abby..

...I wanna go on the pill.

Well, the fact

that you're asking means

there's a possibility

that you might need it?

I suppose. Sort of.

Yeah, well see the first thing

that we've gotta do is

get you to a good doctor.

A gynecologist...for a check-up.

Do I have to?

Yeah, it's a good idea.

See because the pill

might not be

the right thing for you

and you've got to look

into the alternatives.

Then after we're absolutely sure

that everything's okay,

medically

then you and I

can get together again

for another good long talk

about the other issues.

What other issues?

Hmm, things like, um..

...commitment, morality,

responsibility..

...maybe even love.

You know I feel much better now

that I've talked to you.

This is the first time anybody's

ever asked me about that.

Especially a new daughter

and, uh..

Well, I've gotta tell you

that I, um..

I really appreciate

your confidence in coming to me.

Thank you.

Well, I hate that

you've been going through this

all by yourself.

Well, I tried talking

to other people, you know

but they just weren't much help.

Yeah, I remember.

Would you like for me to go

with you to the doctor?

Um..

No. No, I think

I better handle this on my own.

Okay.

I just wish

we could've talked sooner.

I tried, Abby..

...but you're just not around

that much.

[vacuum cleaner whirring]

Hey!

What's going on?

Uh, just routine.

(Joannie)

'But Abby, this is Wednesday.'

We don't usually do

the cleaning till Saturday.

(Abby)

'Until today,

I just hired myself.'

For house-work?

Yeah, but I don't do windows.

'Oh, and girls listen, um..'

If there's anything

you want, uh

anything you need, um..

Well, I-I'm gonna be

around a lot

so, um, any problem,

uh, big or small

'just call, okay?'

Okay, Abby.

- Bye.

- Yeah, thanks.

Bye.

'Oh, hey, Nicholas.'

Uh, is there anything

you want to ask me

uh, 'cause go ahead,

just ask me.

I-I'm here, ready to listen.

Are we getting a monkey?

Monkey?

All those bananas.

Boy!

[chuckles]

Bananas.

[vacuum cleaner whirring]

[instrumental music]

Hi. Uh, why the back door?

Oh, I, uh, thought

I'd pick up a few things.

You know, in case Abby forgot.

What'd you buy, dad?

Oh, um, nothing much.

Just, uh, some eggs

and, uh, a little coffee and..

I don't believe it. Bananas.

Elizabeth, I'm-I'm sorry

about last night

the way I blew up.

Dad, I want to tell you

that I--

No, don't say anything,

just listen

because it's been on my mind

all day and I..

I'm sorry. I overreacted.

I-I should've treated it

all much more delicately.

We understand each other.

You know how I feel.

So let's not talk

about it anymore, alright?

Unless you...wanna talk

about it.

No, I think everybody has talked

about it enough.

Good, good, we'll just let it..

...lie then for a while,

alright?

Where is Abby?

- Dining room.

- Oh.

Hi.

Wow.

Beautiful.

Just felt like a little

celebration tonight.

What are we celebrating?

Well, um, I've taken a leave

of absence from my job.

Why, what's wrong?

Oh, Tom, I-I just feel

I've had my priorities

a little messed up and,

and I wanna change all that.

Oh, wait a minute. I never asked

you to leave your work.

I know.

I asked me.

But I mean you'd be around

the house all day.

It's a big change.

Are you up to that?

Yes, I'm up to that.

From now on,

aside from my graduate classes

you're my favorite charity.

Alright. All donations

gratefully accepted.

Listen, why not, uh,

dinner will be ready soon.

So why don't you go change

into something more comfortable.

I've done all the laundry

and the ironing.

Boy, oh, boy, what other

surprises await me?

Starch in a golf shirt?

Boy, that is a big change.

[telephone ringing]

Hello?

Yes, this is

the Bradford residence.

Oh. Uh, doctor's appointment?

Well, uh, v-very..

Hold on, let-let me get

a pencil and paper.

Yes. Alright,

I-I have it right here.

Yes, go ahead. What is it?

Appointment, changed to Friday

at :.

Very good. Thank you.

Oh, well, wait a minute,

w-which doctor is this?

Dr. Clark.

Clark, that must be, uh

Mrs. Bradford's dentist?

Oh, gynecologist. Excuse me.

Well, don't worry.

I'll see to it that

Mrs. Bradford gets the message.

Thank..

Miss Bradford?

Which Miss Bradford?

Elizabeth?

Elizabeth?

Where's Elizabeth?

She's in the shower.

Elizabeth!

(Elizabeth)

'One second.'

Yeah, dad, am I holding up

dinner or something?

Why am I always

the last one to know?

Everybody knows

what's going on in this place.

- But not me.

- Not I.

Lets skip the grammar lesson.

If the telephone didn't ring

once in a while

I'd never know anything

that was going on.

I don't know

what you're talking about.

You don't know

what I'm talking about?

How could she know

what you were talking about?

She knew what

I was talking about.

Because you pushed her

into a corner.

She's in a corner?

Huh, I'm surrounded.

I mean if it isn't the crisis

about Miss Dinah

it's the crisis

around this house!

No, no.

You usurped my position.

I told Elizabeth no

and you told Elizabeth yes.

I did no such thing.

I told her about the doctor

so that she would have

the opportunity to figure--

Ah-hah!

You see what?

You just admitted it.

You countermanded my orders.

Oh, I'm sorry

about that, general.

You neglected to tell me

you'd ordered her.

I neglected to find out

your time schedule.

I can't tell whether

you're coming or going!

Or downstairs

cooking dinner for you.

Or falling fast asleep

snoring pleasantly away

while the whole house

collapses around you.

- I never snore.

- Oh, come on.

Everybody snores.

I even snore sometimes.

All the time.

You see,

you're exaggerating again.

Just the way you did

about the starch in my collar.

That's a golf shirt.

Not a guillotine.

I prefer the latter.

You know, you never told me

about this side of you

before we were married.

How could I? You were too busy

trying to trap me.

- I heard that.

- I meant for you to hear.

Yes, well, I did hear it

and I will remember it.

I heard it.

I never snore.

[instrumental music]

[honking]

Oh, David, what'd you do, man?

Free the trans?

I don't know what's wrong yet.

I just put it in neutral

and hauled it.

Oh, David!

David, thank you so much.

Oh, I can't thank you enough, I

just can't imagine

what it was like

being on the freeway.

I've never been so glad to see

a cop in my whole life.

- Yeah, what happened?

- Well, Gwendolyn just stopped.

Fine. Is she gonna be okay?

[imitating car revving]

Boy, oh, boy.

You'd think anybody

who's car leaked oil

would know enough to go

to a mechanic

before the red light went on.

Tommy, would you please

tell your father

that anyone who can't even

master learning to drive

an old-fashioned flipped over H

should be the last to talk.

Nicholas, you go tell him.

But I just got in.

Get out.

Hey, what's up?

Uh, they're not talking.

She said "some people,

flipped over H.."

Abby, what did you say?

People who can't drive

shouldn't throw stones.

[groaning]

You tell her that

there's an invention called..

..the telephone.

Considerate people call

when their car breaks down

and they're going to be out.

Half the night and further more

the way she launders shirts

could be considered as*ault

with a deadly w*apon.

He said that?

That's what he said?

Well, I heard it

through the grapevine.

Mm-hmm.

The sour grapevine.

[instrumental music]

- I got you, dad.

- Don't "got you" me.

What the heck are those?

Oh, these are dice

and this is a brodie knob.

Oh, you know Steve Brodie

the guy who jumped off

the Brooklyn Bridge?

Bridge jumping and

a brodie knobs are both illegal.

'and they're both very hazardous

to the health.'

I read you loud and clear, dad.

Elizabeth?

It's almost four.

(Elizabeth)

'I'm coming.'

I'll make it.

I've got plenty of time.

Okay. We'll talk

when you get back.

- Okay?

- Okay.

You sure you don't want me

to come? 'Cause I'll come.

It's okay. Thanks, Abby.

Okay.

[dramatic music]

Go ahead.

You're still going?

My appointment's at :.

[cranks car]

[music continues]

[instrumental music]

Mrs. Rothman.

Hi.

Are you Miss Bradford?

Yes.

Go right in.

[music continues]

Miss Bradford?

This is your first visit.

Would you mind filling out

some forms for me?

[music continues]

Look.

You told me it was fixed.

I like you Elizabeth.

A lot.

But we're just

not gonna make it.

I don't know why I did it.

I-I just..

Please don't be mad

at me, Ronnie.

Sorry, little girl.

I got to get to work.

Catch you later.

Ronnie.

What about our date, tonight?

Like I said, I'll be home.

If you don't make it, well then

I guess that's just three

strikes, you know.

'And if it makes any difference,

I'll send your cassette back.'

'Don't sweat it.'

[instrumental music]

[instrumental music]

Abby will be happy.

It's only a loose oil pan.

Oh, I'll have this out

in just a minute.

- What?

- 'The generator.'

No, don't. I checked

the brushes. They're okay.

And it's not the regulator?

'No.'

- The thermostat.

- 'No.'

Wait a minute,

the mixture's too rich

and she's flooding out.

It's the carburetor, right?

Right. Good boy.

Give the man a brass ring.

Exactly what I thought.

[panting]

Well, ah, there you go.

Oh, Lord.

Well, don't worry.

We'll have it on the road.

Yeah, right to the junk yard.

Tommy, you just turn

this little screw.

You don't dismantle

the whole engine.

Go get me a cool drink, okay?

[chuckles]

[whispering]

Don't slam.

Okay.

Why are we whispering?

I have a cake in the oven.

- Oh, I'm sorry.

- That's okay.

Hey, don't worry

about your car

we'll get it fixed in no time.

Cake, remember?

- Hey, Abby, have you seen--

- Shh!

- What's the matter?

- I have a cake in the oven.

Oh!

What kind?

Angel food.

Oh, love it.

You know, I always thought

it was the vibrations

not the sound

that made it "pshhh."

Yeah, oh, well, not taking

any chances with my first cake

you can understand that?

Oh, yeah. I can understand.

Is David still there?

- Yeah, he's in the garage.

- Okay.

[crunch]

- The cake.

- Right.

[sighs]

[dramatic music]

[birds chirping]

[door opens]

[music continues]

- I've had it!

- My cake!

[slams]

I will not tolerate..

[hissing]

And you thought, that I was

gonna, when I went bang on the..

[indistinct chattering]

No, no, no, no, no.

You did that..

[indistinct chattering]

The flattest cake I ever saw.

Yes, it's a garbage cake.

What kind of a cake is that?

- Garbage disposal.

- No, no, no.

It's not a garbage.

No, no, the kids will eat it.

- The kids will?

- The kids will eat anything.

[sighs]

With this ring, I thee wed.

You're a nut.

Do you know that?

And, I love you.

I got to get you

out of this kitchen.

Somewhere else.

It's true, I'm not a baker.

- Just the two of us?

- Just the two of us.

Okay.

But first there's something

I've got to straighten out.

[knock on door]

Come in.

Hi, Elizabeth.

I, uh...thought you might like

a piece of Abby's cake.

Oh, it-it tastes a lot better

than it looks.

Appearances can be

very deceiving.

You sure you won't have some?

[instrumental music]

Yes, uh...deceiving.

Like a father who blows off

a lot of steam, but..

...loves his daughter very much.

Honey.

You know, unless people listen

to what the other says

deep inside..

I mean...if you don't read

between the lines..

...sometimes it's-it's very

difficult for a father

to-to deal with certain things.

Perhaps, it's-it's because,

he's afraid that..

...ultimately, he's letting go.

It's very hard for a parent

to let a child grow up.

Make her own way.

'Her own life.'

I know what you mean, daddy.

No, you don't.

But you will.

I know how you feel

about this boy.

Believe it or not, I-I haven't

forgotten what it was like

to be young.

Impulsive.

But, a mature relationship

isn't something

to be taken lightly.

You'd have to be ready to

accept the responsibilities

for the freedoms that..

...that go with it.

Elizabeth, I trust

your value judgments.

But don't let our...relationship

get the point where all I do

around here is

pay the rent

and...buy your food.

[door closes]

[laughing]

Ah, those pajama's could keep

you awake.

They're supposed to.

They're for Elizabeth.

She's going to a slumber party.

Hmm. I'd trade microbiology

for a slumber party any day.

Oh, brother.

Hey, Elizabeth, look

what I borrowed from..

Is that the new look

in slumber party attire?

Ronnie kept calling me

little girl.

I'll show him little girl.

Elizabeth.

So what if Ronnie said that.

He's a jerk.

You don't have to prove

anything to jerks.

Leave me alone.

I know what I'm doing.

Elizabeth,

would you please wait.

You didn't help when I asked

your advice, so butt out.

But I wanna talk to--

I can take care

of myself, Nancy.

Elizabeth!

Mary.

Nancy, you know

I'm trying to study.

- What're you doing?

- Where can I get a car?

Take the wagon.

Elizabeth just took the wagon

and dad took the sedan.

Well, Elizabeth's entitled.

She's .

She's only ,

that's the problem.

I've got to get a car.

I've got to get over there.

Get over where?

Oh, Mary, I wish I could tell

you, but I can't.

It's between Elizabeth and me.

Who're you calling?

Hi, don't you people

ever lock your door?

I need your van.

Well, wait.

No. Nancy.

Now, what's that all about?

I've got a date.

Hey, look. Don't look at me.

I just live here, huh.

But I've got a date.

[crickets chirping]

[instrumental music]

Well...Ronnie knows

I'm not a little girl now.

He also knows that a woman is

a person and not just an object.

Here's the cassette I borrowed.

- He didn't open it.

- That's right.

He doesn't deserve it.

Do you think

I did the right thing?

You did the right thing.

But I liked him so much.

Yeah, I know, Elizabeth.

I too.

But when the time's right,

you won't wonder anymore.

I'm sorry, I yelled at you.

Hey, I'm sorry,

I didn't come through.

- But I got an idea.

- What?

Why don't we go out

for pie and ice cream?

I know it's fattening,

but it'll be my treat, okay?

Okay.

- Nancy?

- Yeah.

If I wasn't outside,

when you drove up..

...what were you gonna do?

[laughs]

I don't know.

'Oh, gosh.'

Hey, what time is it?

'Uh, about nine.'

Wanna go to a slumber party?

You nut.

Hey, dad, you're really

getting with it.

Hey, listen to this.

"Dear Cynic, yes, there is

a water shortage.

"But is the tub half empty

or is it half full?

Uh, bathing can be fine,

together."

[cheering]

(Tommy)

'Yeah, pretty racy there.'

Dear Miss Dinah.

Do you think that a woman

who's been in

a career all her life can make

the adjustment to a family with

'eight children and still go to

classes two nights a week'

even though it'll take her

years to earn her PhD?

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[indistinct chattering]

Come on. How would you all like

to write this column?

- 'Oh, yes.'

- 'Spare me.'

Hmm, my sentiments, exactly.

Dear Miss Dinah,

just a brief note.

Thanks, for being there

when you were needed.

And dear Abby..

(Tom)

'Oh, wait a minute.'

That's my competition.

What kinda house is this?

Doesn't even have a banana.

[laughing]

[theme music]

[music continues]