[Match Strikes]
[Engine Running]
# [Rock]
[Tires Screeching]
- Mmm!
- Hey.
[Girl Giggling]
- [Continues]
- Hey, how come we never
got together before?
Well, because I always
had a boyfriend.
- [Screams]
- You still got one?
Would you still be my boyfriend
if I ditched you at the prom?
Never happen.
- Watch it, your highness.
- Let me drive.
- I wanna drive.
- No, I don't think...
Let me drive.
I got a better place for your hand.
Oh, yeah.
# You might think I'm crazy
[Screeching]
[Horn Blowing]
- [Ends]
- [Engine Hissing]
[Girl Moaning]
[Girl Giggling]
[Woman] Inhale through your nose.
- [Inhaling]
- Exhale through your mouth.
Turn the wheel to the right.
Inhale through your nose.
[Inhales]
Exhale, turn the wheel
to the left.
Inhale through your nose.
[Inhales]
Turn the wheel
to the right.
[Ball Bouncing]
Oh, very good.
Okay, ready?
Oh, Irma hit it
with her head!
Gimme five on that.
Right here. Good job.
[Woman On Police Radio]
One-baker-ten, two-eleven in progress.
243 Maple.
- [Man Chattering]
- [Jail Door Opening]
[Jail Door Closing]
Now,
what color ribbon would you like today:
blue or peach?
[Air Brakes Hissing]
- [Man] You got it?
- [Man #2] All right.
Easy does it.
[Woman] I wanna have my bath now.
You already had
your bath, Diane.
- Stroke, huh?
- That's what they told me.
- Thanks.
- You're welcome.
I think we can remove
his restraints now.
I know he deserves
the same care as anyone else,
but we're really not set up
to accommodate the state's overflow.
Hey, I just move 'em.
Carol!
Just, uh, sign here.
Would you please take
Mr. Manning to 114?
[Jail Door Opening]
[Jail Door Closing]
[Man On P.A.] For a bargain
shopping trip to the outlet center.
Can you follow this?
How about
a little squeeze?
Man, why'd they have you
chained up like that?
[Thump]
- He's a felon.
- Shh!
Ladies, you should know
better than that. Go on.
There's plenty of time
to visit later.
Go.
Not a lot of privacy
around here,
but considering
where you've been,
a little female attention
might be nice.
Right. How 'bout
a little music?
- ## [Country]
- We got rock 'n' roll. We got jazz.
We got country.
We got lots of country here.
[Click]
- [Whirring]
- How was work?
Okay.
Got a new guy in.
- Guess what he was?
- What?
A bank robber.
Pretty good one too.
Took them 30 years to catch him.
- The only reason they did
was a blackout.
- Why'd he black out?
He didn't black out.
Denver did.
The whole city.
The emergency generator
kicked in.
The vault shuts, and the next day
when they open the vault...
Are the keys in the car?
- Yeah.
- Okay. See you in the morning.
They found him
in the vault.
[Birds Chirping]
- [Alarm Beeping]
- [Woman On Radio] Rise and shine.
It's another beautiful day
in the Pacific Northwest,
and our Oregon forecast
promises sunshine.
[Turns Radio Off]
Honey?
Thank you.
Carol.
How 'bout it?
You and me?
[Motorcycle Starting]
[Screeching]
If my husband
were alive, hah!
## [Country]
This looks pretty good.
Are you in there
remembering it all,
or did everything
just get erased?
What's his problem?
He had a stroke.
What's your excuse?
Uh-oh.
Are you mad at me?
You're really gonna
be mad at me?
You said you were gonna
drive me to work.
Damn. Look at you.
You are so beautiful.
You know how beautiful you are?
You always say that to me
when I'm mad at you.
Beats fightin'.
So? Where were you?
Um...
It was a work thing.
- Really?
- Yeah.
Drinking with the boss,
that's hard work.
But...
[Clears Throat]
You're lookin'
at a supervisor.
- Really?
- Mm-hmm.
Day shift?
How did I know you
were gonna ask that?
But it is
80 bucks raise...
and a full pension, benefits,
the whole nine yards.
- Pension.
- So you don't have to eat
cat food when you get old.
Or wind up
like this poor slob.
The sad thing is, he probably has
loads of money somewhere.
[Whispering] He's the guy
I told you about, the bank robber.
Hey, I'll get on
the day shift soon, okay?
That would be nice.
I could see you once in a while.
[Deejay On Radio]
Now with a blast from the past,
You Might Think from The Cars.
Congratulations.
I'm happy about the promotion.
# You might think
it's hysterical
# I know when you're weak
# You think you're
in the movies
- Now?
- You can't do this here!
- Mmm!
- But I think that you're wild
# When you flash
that fragile smile
# You might think
it's foolish
# What you put me through
- You might think
- You might think I'm crazy
- All I want
- All I want is you
# And it was hard
# So hard to take
# There's no escape
# Without a scrape
- But you kept it goin'
till the sun fell down
- [Carol Moaning]
# You kept it goin'
[Snaps Fingers]
[Announcer] Coming on
powerfully. Skipper Joe
and Sure Thing losing ground.
In the backstretch, five lengths to go,
Moon Glow moving fast.
High Hat, Rooty-Tooty,
Caliente and Alibi are all there.
King's Ransom
on the extreme outside.
Skipper Joe making a move.
Sure Thing under the whip.
# [Radio]
# The seasons will fade
but one thing rem... ##
She can't just go changing
the rules on us like that.
And I'll go to the union
if I have to. She knows I will.
[TV: Horse Racing Continues]
- [Coughing]
- ## [Singing Continues]
[Gagging]
[Glass Shattering]
- [Coughing]
- Help me lift her up.
Okay, up you go.
[Gagging]
[Coughs]
Ohh!
[Crash]
- No way can you fake a stroke.
- He could.
Do you know
what he did?
He started a company
that sold security systems to banks.
- Yeah, so?
- And then he robbed the banks.
I saw him. You know, this coleslaw's
got more going on than he does.
- Maybe you need a hobby or something.
- [Slaps Butt]
[Woman] Well, your strawberries,
bananas and apples float,
and your prunes
and peaches sink.
You just have to tell
the floaters from the sinkers.
Kinda like men.
[Man] I got it, I got it. Okay.
I'll bet those prison doctors
gave you a real going-over.
- [Rock]
- Sticking you with pins.
Whacking you with hammers.
Did they hurt you?
Obviously, they took
the wrong approach.
That's the difference
between doctors and nurses.
Doctors can be so tied
to medical procedures.
But sometimes...
a little down-home therapy
is so much more effective.
# When she's dancing
'neath the starry sky
# Ooh, she'll make you flip
Here she comes again
# When she's dancing
'neath the starry sky
# I kinda like the way
she dips
Are your lips dry?
- She's my best friend's girl
- Is that why you can't speak to me?
# She's my best friend's girl
# But she used to be mine
Wouldn't it feel good
to just let go, hmm?
Hmm?
I know you're in there.
Come out, come out,
wherever you are.
# But when you
bite your lip
# It's a reaction to love
- Here she comes again
- When she's dancing
'neath the starry sky
Therapy can be very difficult
if you resist.
Maybe you need
a less-structured environment.
# When she's dancing
'neath the starry sky
This is very thoughtful of you, Carol,
especially on your day off,
but I really don't think Mr. Manning
will be able to appreciate a picnic.
You know, Mrs. Foster,
deep down inside, I think he will.
Don't worry, baby.
We're gonna have a great time.
Well, sure. We got beer.
We got, uh...
We got diapers.
Want a beer, Henry?
I thought he was
the designated driver.
- How about a little chicken?
- Don't t*rture the poor bastard.
I'm not torturing him.
He's just being stubborn.
Guy can't even have a stroke without
some chick taking it personally, huh?
Wayne, don't you have
some fishing to do?
Okay, Henry.
It's just you and me.
I know you hear me.
This is your last chance.
Just remember,
this was your choice.
Didn't have
to come to this.
Oh, my God.
Ah!
Carol!
Okay, so you're smart.
Really smart.
What do you want?
A minute ago,
you couldn't shut up.
Now you can't talk, huh?
What is it?
You lookin' to blackmail me? You're
gonna put the bite on me, is that it?
- Carol! You lay a finger
on her, and I'll...
- What, splash me?
Come on!
Now, what do you want?
- Come on!
- [Gasps]
- I don't know.
- You don't know.
I just... I don't like
being made a fool of.
Two and a half years I've been
working on this hype, and that's it?
- That's it.
- I don't believe this.
So, what are you
gonna do?
What am I gonna do? What the hell are
you gonna do? And what about him, huh?
- Hey!
- And what about you?
What about me what?
You wanna be a hero, huh?
You wanna stick me back in
the slammer for a couple years?
Are you... Is he...
Are you calling me a rat?
Oh, boy.
I need a drink.
# [Blues]
You know, it's funny
the kind of stuff...
that you can get shipped
into a prison library.
Tantric Buddhism,
mind control, autohypnosis.
Gotta... gather up
all that stuff.
Find out what you need
and make it work for you. I did that.
All day, all night.
Every day, every night.
Like I was in training.
Yeah. I played sports.
Yeah, well, faking a stroke
is not exactly like, uh,
an Olympic event,
but I gotta tell ya,
if you know they're gonna be
stickin' pins in ya,
and you know that there are gonna
be guards 24 hours a day...
just waitin' for you
to screw up on the hustle,
then you know it ain't good enough
to be just... playin' possum.
You gotta be a possum.
Dead possum.
So you work,
and you learn just to funnel...
everything down,
so finally all you know,
all you are is a heartbeat.
I gotta tell you,
you get to a place like that,
it is some kick in the ass.
Then you take that,
and after a while,
you can shape it and mold it
and squeeze it till...
Hey, I can make every heartbeat
sound like Frank Sinatra.
- Man.
- Yeah, man.
I'll tell ya...
One day, this cockroach...
just climbed off my collar,
decided to take a hike
around my face,
and he parked...
half on my upper lip
and half inside my nose.
He just scratched around
in there,
lookin' for a little action.
That's when you hope and pray
there's a guard watching...
so that the moment won't be
entirely lost to history.
But, hey, after a while,
a couple hours,
doesn't matter.
Just a contest...
between Frank Sinatra,
you and the cockroach.
So who won?
[Sizzling]
And you thought that you could get a
rise out of me with a little lap dance.
Lap... Lap dance?
It's, um...
Therapy.
Kind of... hippy stuff.
You wanna dance?
Come on.
It's okay with you?
Yeah, sure.
What the hell.
What the hell.
# Lie to me
# And tell me that
you'll stay here tonight
# Tell me that
you'll never leave
- [Continues]
- [Carol] Aren't you worried
being seen like this?
You're the one that
ought to be worried.
Everybody wondering
what the hell you're doing...
dancing with your
great-great-great-great grandfather.
I never danced with him.
So, come here often?
Lady, I've been coming here every day
for the last five years.
[Laughs]
You?
Often enough.
Why don't you go
someplace else?
It's the only
someplace else in town.
Try a new town.
[Sizzles]
How long you guys been
goin' together?
I don't know.
Since high school.
We were king and queen
of the prom.
Kind of made sense,
you know. King, queen.
When did it stop
making sense?
# Oh, anyone can see
# That you love him
more than me
# But right now, baby
let me pretend
# That our love
will never end
# Lie to me
- Yeah, come on, baby
- Go ahead and lie to me
Not bad. Looks like you did
a lot of dancing in the joint.
Those were guys.
This is different.
[Laughs]
Ow. Take it easy.
Are you gonna be
all right?
- Huh?
- I'm okay.
What were you
talking about?
What? You're jealous.
Why would I be jealous?
- You are. You're jealous.
- No way.
I mean, look at the guy.
He's about to keel over.
Where'd he go? Carol.
Check the men's room.
Oh, g*dd*mn it!
He's gone.
He took the car.
Oh, no. No, that's it.
I'm calling the cops.
- And tell them what?
- Anything.
We turned our backs, he was in the
wheelchair, he was gone. I don't know.
Oh, was that before or after
I was seen dancing with him?
You can't
call the cops.
How could you do this?
You come up with these ideas
and I end up having to go along.
And every time, the sh*t hits the fan,
who's gotta clean it up? Me!
What are we gonna do here?
What do we do?
What do we do, huh?
I don't know.
Why don't we fix
the Mustang...
- and just get the hell out of here?
- Yeah.
- And then what?
- Well,
just keep going till we find
someplace we like.
You know what?
I like it here just fine.
I couldn't call earlier.
I'll explain later. Hey, just come
and get me and bring the money.
There's a train station. It's about
a mile from the home on Route 6.
- Is this better? How's this?
- [Wrench Clicking]
You know I love that car.
You better hope
he doesn't trash it.
I don't see why you couldn't have
done this weeks ago.
Yeah, yeah.
[Woman Muttering]
[Siren Wailing]
[Siren Continues]
[Siren Stops]
- Hey, did it go good?
- Yeah. I signed him in.
- Anyone see you?
- No.
It's their problem now.
Oh, there you are.
I've been looking all over for you.
- We have a serious problem.
- [Door Opens]
Carol, are you listening?
Mrs. Tetlow vandalized
her ankle monitor last night.
I want you to pay
special attention to her.
I'm concerned.
She might be a danger to herself.
Okay, great.
- Great?
- Um...
I'll take care of it.
Don't worry.
[Sighs]
Why did you come back?
Nobody's business.
You knew I wouldn't
call the cops on you,
but that doesn't mean
I won't sign you up for bingo.
So...
Why did you come back?
All right.
I'll do it for you.
After making
a complete ass of me,
you went and called someone,
but you couldn't reach them.
No. Maybe you did reach them,
and they're gonna pick you up here.
I mean, you're a lot safer here
than you are on the outside...
with the cops
looking for you, right?
Or maybe...
you came back because you didn't
want to get me in trouble.
[Man] N43.
Ah.
There you are,
Mr. Manning.
- Did they say B 13?
- No, dear, it was G.
- I don't think so.
- Oh, I'm quite sure of it, dear.
It was G.
- I heard D.
- I don't want to argue about it anymore.
G for George.
- Did you say B 13?
- I really don't want to argue
about this, you know.
It was G.
Oh, look.
Mr. Manning
has a bingo.
Lucky man.
I can't find
my weddin' ring.
Oh, don't worry, dear.
It'll turn up.
I don't know. And I always
hide it in the same place.
- Well, I'm sure it'll turn up, dear.
- I don't know.
- You mustn't worry.
- I'm so forgetful these days.
- No.
- I couldn't find it anywhere.
I've lost a lot of
things like that,
and I just can't figure out
what happens to them.
- Oh, my... Oh!
- Let me help you. Hold on a minute.
He's landed on his head.
- Did he croak?
- No. I think he just got
a little bit lazy.
He'll be all right now.
Well, you lucked out.
That's all I can say.
I lucked out?
How about we lucked out?
Hmm.
So now you're just gonna
lay off, right?
Right?
Carol, everything's back
where it was.
Don't screw it up again,
okay?
Okay.
[Thunder Rumbling]
Hey!
Okay, got the money?
What do you mean,
you didn't bring it?
You son of a bitch!
What the hell are you doin' here?
Hey!
[Thunder Rumbling]
Ahh!
[Shoe Squeaks]
Shh.
Is there anything
I can do?
Yeah. Scrape up a million bucks,
then hijack a plane.
So what happened? Did your partner
run out with your money?
My partner's dead.
Before he went, I was in the slammer,
and he got in touch...
and asked me what I
wanted to do with my money.
So I told him, Let your kid
hold it for me.
Cute kid. Taught him
how to hustle gin rummy.
You know what that cute kid
just told me?
If I come around or try anything,
he's gonna drop a dime.
Man, am I b*at.
Try not to make noise
in the morning.
It's your day off,
right?
Yeah, but Kitty's moving.
I told her I'd help her.
Well, that sucks.
I know,
but I owe her a favor.
I can't
get out of it now.
Are you quitting?
Gonna try.
I can't understand
these instructions.
Honey, I'm trying
to read this.
Hey, Carol.
I thought I'd
come back later,
- give you a ride on my hog.
- That's good, Karl.
But if you're gonna compare your crank
to a bike, you should get a scooter.
[Starts Motor]
[Screeching]
[expl*si*n, Crash]
I can't look.
- [Motor Putters, Stops]
- Oh, dear.
Oh, my God.
It's okay.
He's getting up.
Hold on a minute.
No, he's out.
He's gonna need a good dentist.
[Laughing]
It's a matter of getting
too attached.
I know, but it's just that he doesn't
have family like the others.
I understand, but it'll be
that much harder...
when they transfer him back
to a prison hospital.
When?
They promised me there'll be
a bed opening up soon.
You look like
we're going someplace.
It's a surprise.
- Is that a nicotine patch?
- Mm-hmm.
I didn't want you using yourself
as an ashtray again.
Thanks.
Here you go.
Here you go.
- Nice little getaway for you.
- I don't need a round trip.
A bank.
Thanks.
So what do you think?
- I should've ordered pancakes.
- I mean about the bank.
What, they're giving away
free toaster ovens.
Can you imagine what kind
of moron it takes...
to open a bank account
in order to get a free toaster oven?
- Think we could knock that place off?
- Beg your pardon?
Do you think we could
knock that place off?
- Who?
- You and me.
Honey, I am playing brain-dead,
not brain-damaged.
Tell me, how can you go from just
taking care of dead people...
to what I'm
listening to now?
- You're the one who said
I needed a new town.
- When?
When we were dancing...
and you said me and Wayne
didn't make sense anymore.
You wanna save your marriage by robbing
a bank. Why don't you go see a priest?
- That's not what I'm saying.
- What are you saying?
I'm saying...
I'm gonna wake up one morning
wearing diapers,
sucking lime Jell-O
through a straw,
and I'm gonna wonder
where my life went.
I'm the one
who's dead here.
I gotta...
do something.
Stick to lap dancing.
[Door Opens]
Is everything
okay here?
Yeah,
everything's okay here.
I'm not so sure about
out there.
- Hi.
- Hi.
Um, I want
a toaster oven.
Great. Let's just get you
a new-account application.
Oh, no, no.
I don't want to open a new account.
I just want
a toaster oven.
Oh, well,
that's the thing, see.
First, you have to open up
a new account, $500 minimum,
and then you get
a toaster oven.
[Snickers]
Farwell.
- Can I call you Farwell?
- Please.
You know something?
- I used to be the prom queen.
- Really?
- I'm not surprised.
- But the sad fact is,
prom queen, it doesn't
really prepare you for much in life.
It's been kind of
downhill ever since.
I'm not saying I'm bitter. I'm just
saying that I don't have much time.
And there's only one thing that's gonna
make me feel good about myself again.
Toast.
Uh, I'm afraid
I don't understand.
- Then give me a toaster oven.
- Sorry, ma'am, l...
I don't wanna have
to get ugly on you, Farwell.
Hurry.
God, I need a cigarette.
[Laughs]
Wonder if they have this
in black?
Baked potatoes,
450 degrees for 45 minutes.
That's your idea
of a bank job, huh?
[Laughs]
Cakes in medium tins...
Hey, you flashed your knockers,
you got a toaster.
350 degrees for 30 minutes.
If you'd have dropped your panties,
you might have got a cast-iron stove.
And defrosted pastries...
Who knows? A whole kitchen,
for Christ's sake.
15 minutes at 325.
[Tires Screech]
Excuse me.
You're up.
Here's what I think of
your g*dd*mn bank robbery.
It says you're not supposed
to immerse it in water.
Hey, you ain't listenin'.
What I'm sayin' is, however easy
it looks, you got a job to do.
Meaning?
Do your homework.
Ah.
[Car Door Opens, Closes]
Hey.
Hey. How was the move?
It was a pain in the ass.
Hey, you know what? You're gonna
get grease on your clothes.
- Something wrong?
- No.
You should've seen it. They looked
like bees coming to gather up pollen,
so I followed them
back to the hive.
A depository, Henry,
where the banks bank.
The only one around
for a hundred miles.
That's a lot of honey, honey.
How's that for homework?
Good on the money,
not so good on the choice.
Five years ago, maybe,
but today you'd need an army.
We hit the armored car,
get the money before it gets in.
I must be goin' nuts.
- It'd be tough with two.
- Hmm.
[Carol On Answering Machine] Hi,
honey, it's me. I'm still with Kitty.
Um, I'll be home
a little later, okay?
[Beeps]
- Whoa! Whoa!
- [Tires Screeching]
Hey, Wayne, where do you think
you're going?
- You all right there, buddy?
- Yep.
Just checking.
By the way, that was a stop sign
back there.
Oh, yeah?
- Okay. Say hi to Carol.
- Yep.
[Engine Revs]
[Tires Screeching]
- Hi.
- Hi, Kitty.
[Man On P.A.] Sign up for our
bargain shopping trip...
to the outlet center
next Tuesday.
There are eight more places
available, so don't delay.
Lady.
I've had enough of this.
Irma, take Diane for me
for a minute.
- No!
- Please? I'll owe you one.
- One?
- Just do it.
[Straining]
Come on.
Wayne, what are we doin'?
I'd like to know what you think
you're doing with my wife.
You stay away from her.
I'll clean your clock.
From now on, if you know what's good
for you, she gives you your medicine,
she takes your temperature
and that's it.
Wayne, what are you doing? What are
you doing? You can't do this here!
Why not? I can do
whatever the hell I want!
- Shh! You're gonna blow everything.
- I'm gonna blow everything?
What about you, the other day
in your damn car?
- Don't bother lying. I saw you.
- Shh!
We have to talk.
It's not what you think,
if that's what you're thinking.
- Tell me about it.
- Okay.
- We're working together.
- What are you talking about?
We're doing a job
together.
- What job?
- A bank job.
You expect me
to believe that?
- Yes.
- Okay, so you don't want
to screw the old guy.
You just want to
rob a bank with him.
No. It's just
an armored car.
Oh. Just one of those
steel-plated trucks,
bulletproof glass, a couple guys
inside with shotguns, Carol?
That's exactly why we were gonna
ask you to do it with us,
- but you didn't give us a chance.
- Us? What do you mean, us?
- Me and Henry.
- Carol, we're us. He's just him.
- Honey...
- I'm gonna tell that son of a bitch...
No! It was my idea.
Yeah? Well, you never wanted
to rob a bank until he came along.
- Henry, what are you doing here?
- How am I gonna run the sprinklers...
- when you leave your people
all over the place?
- I don't know. sh**t!
Thanks, man.
Figured you'd be here.
- How come you couldn't just be
a compulsive shopper?
- Let's go home.
- I can deal with that.
- Let's go home.
Watch it.
You know the conclusion
I've come to?
It doesn't matter
what I think.
You get something in your head,
you're gonna do it.
Right?
What am I gonna do,
tie you to a tree or...
have you put away till you get
your head straightened out?
I'll tell you
what I'm gonna do.
I'm gonna do it with you.
You are?
You're damn right, I am.
- That's great. That's exactly...
- No, no. Hold on.
I'm not doing it
'cause you want me to.
I'm doing it
'cause I want to, okay?
And another thing.
If I'm in, you listen to me, not him.
- [Opens Door]
- And...
[Sighs]
After this,
we can go back to normal, right?
No... No more robberies.
You got it?
Got it.
You said
we could use a third.
No, I didn't.
I said it would be tough with two.
You should've seen him
on the football field.
He was so clutch.
He always
kept his head.
He didn't keep his head
yesterday.
What did you expect?
He saw us in the car together.
I lied to him.
Of course he went nuts.
I mean, what if it
were reversed?
What if it were
you and me?
You would've flattened him
right in his wheelchair...
in the TV room, in front of
all the little old ladies.
You should give Wayne
some credit for self-control.
- Hey, don't push it.
- Okay.
Try this.
Either he's in or I'm out.
Ohh! Amateur hour.
If anybody had ever told me
a husband and wife amateur hour...
But one thing clear.
If anything goes sour, I'm gone.
I will take my chances,
r*fle the soda machine,
take a g*dd*mn cab,
you got that?
Got it.
Gas station.
Oh, Rite Buy supermarket.
Fifteen checkout lanes,
open twenty-four hours a day.
You do the math.
Gas station.
[Wayne] Oh, this next one's mine.
That's that sports bar
where they got all the sports channels.
Yeah, but nobody spends
any money in there.
Hey, well, at least
it's not a gas station.
People pay cash for gas, honey.
It's a good idea.
Hey, it's a nice show, guys,
but you got it backwards.
You don't rob the route.
You rob the crew.
[Henry] When you see a pair
of Boy Scouts...
marching around with their hands
in their holsters, just stay away.
What you're looking for
is a couple of real oafs.
Hey, baby,
how you doin'?
Hi.
You see that?
She smiled at me.
I'm tellin' ya,
women never leave me alone.
You mean they were
both out of the truck?
- [Laughs]
- Bingo.
So we hit these guys
at the end of their shift,
- we're golden, right?
- No.
But it's perfect.
These guys are idiots.
The more money they're carrying,
the quicker their fingers
will be on the trigger.
We take it with
the beginning of the shift,
- when they're really not
paying attention.
- Truck's gonna be empty.
We have our work cut out
for us then, don't we?
I think we should...
have a little picnic
for the ladies.
So the times we took you out
won't seem so suspicious.
- Bingo too.
- Uh, I'm gonna sit this one out, okay?
- Whoo!
- [Applause, Chattering]
9.9!
- Nine.
- Five.
- Huh?
- You didn't keep your feet together!
- I did too!
- You certainly did not!
- Yes, I did!
- [Carol Laughing]
Makeup stuff, duct tape.
It's all on the list.
I want you to get in touch
with a guy by the name of Lewis.
He's a friend of mine.
- Okay.
- He'll get the g*n guys.
Number is right there. That's it.
Hey, Wayne.
Be cool
with these guys, huh?
I got it.
Look 'em in the eye,
but not like you're gonna
remember their faces.
You think you can do that?
No problem.
- [Turns Engine Off]
- Are you sure this is the place?
Yeah.
That's what he told me.
Are you up for this?
Hmm? Oh, yeah.
I can handle it.
How's this?
Don't squint so much.
Right, okay.
Leave the key in the ignition.
Lock the door.
Hey.
- Be careful.
- I will.
Got a cigarette?
Uh, I quit.
[Chuckles]
You got the money?
[Wayne] Oh, yeah. Um...
- Well, let's go.
- Where to?
You don't really wanna
do this now, do ya?
No... I mean, yeah.
- Let's just do it.
- All right, come on. Let's go.
[Carol] Oh, my God.
[Keys Jingling]
[Gasps]
Jesus!
It's a done deal.
Let's go.
I'm supposed to tell you
Wayne did fine.
The way I heard it, he just barely
didn't soil his shorts.
- Yeah, well, he's still clutch.
- Ah.
- See you Monday night after bed check.
- That's it?
Yeah, that's it.
[Sighs]
I guess that's it.
- Hey.
- Hey.
Grand theft auto.
We are now officially
on the wrong path.
[TV: Engine Running]
- We have to get ready.
- Just a second.
Ah!
So, how is everybody?
Pretty good.
Uh, pretty good.
- [Turns Engine Off]
- What are you doing?
You gonna see if she's okay?
- [Vomiting]
- Oh.
Oh, yeah. Maybe I, uh...
- [Groans]
- Honey?
g*dd*mn
nicotine patches.
Let's get going.
In five hours, I gotta be back
in my little bed.
- You put a little peanut butter
on the trap, that's all.
- And they go for it?
- Cheese they know about 'cause...
- Drop everything.
Hands on the truck.
[Wayne] You heard the man.
Get in the van. Get that door open.
[Wayne] Let's go.
[Henry] Go on. Get up.
- Right on schedule.
- Good. We gotta stay that way.
We get behind,
the alarms start popping.
[Carol] Good morning.
This is Chambers Courier Service.
We're experiencing some mechanical
problems with your usual truck.
We're gonna reroute another crew
to make your scheduled pickup.
We're all set
at the Max Mart.
We've gotta be there
in nine minutes.
Turn her around.
I won't be long.
[Indistinct Radio Chatter]
There's a damn cop car
out here.
What do we do?
- They must be inside.
- Just go in front and wait, I guess.
You an ex-cop?
I used to be
in food security.
You know, bacterial stuff,
protein protection.
My kid brother used to be
a trooper in Maryland.
- Nice state, Maryland.
- Yeah, it's a nice state.
I'll see you guys.
Boy, I got a long night.
Hey! You know a guy named Fassano,
drives for Trusty?
Fassano.
- Passano. I know a Passano.
- Not him.
No, no. He is a good guy.
He's a member of my flock.
You see, my day job,
I got this church.
Let me ask you guys
something.
Are you guys
in a state of grace?
- Grace?
- Yeah.
Are you running parallel with the Lord
right now, or do you think maybe,
just maybe you're runnin' down
a wrong-way street?
Is that our radio?
- Yeah, I think so.
- Gotta go.
Have a good night.
Take care.
Peace.
We're three minutes behind.
[Carol] Hi, this is Deena
at Chambers Courier.
The guys who normally
pick you up,
they threw a rod over at
the AM/PM in Reedsville.
We're sending
a couple of new guys over.
Hey, guys, they're ready for us at the
stadium. Guess the concert's over.
Am I good?
You're good.
- Hiya. Good.
- How's it going? Good.
[Indistinct Radio Chatter]
- Thank you, guys.
- You're welcome.
Okay, sweetie,
let's hit the road.
Okay, 12,000 seats,
30 bucks a seat, 360 grand.
Plus your beer or whatnot.
Add another 60.
420 thou, exactly.
That's right. 420,000.
And for what?
The two of them bouncing around
with a microphone, talking. Talking!
- Is that music? Huh?
- No. No!
I flunked English, but I can write
better stuff than that.
You know what I'm sayin'?
Then they got this other bozo
up there scratching records.
That's it.
420 thou for one night.
How long would it take you to make
420 grand, huh? Figure it out.
I don't know.
Five times five, carry your two...
Twenty years, that's how long,
if you've got seniority.
But you wanna know
what makes it worse?
You wanna know?
They make that much
every night out.
Yep.
Look at that.
- Well, nobody said life
was a bowl of cherries.
- Yeah.
Wow.
- Yeah. Good night.
- Nightie-night.
[Carol] Hi, this is Deena
at Chambers Courier.
We're running
a little bit late today.
Yeah, we've got some new guys
on the route.
Yeah, you know how it is.
Yo!
- You're new?
- That's me. You Kenny?
Mm-hmm. Kenny Jr.
Oh. It's
a family business, huh?
Yeah, we're
his sisters.
Don't be
talking about my sister.
I'll be right back.
You in a lot of trouble.
He gonna tell his mommy.
Y'all gonna be around
when I get off?
Um, bring a couple bags of money,
we'll be wherever you want us to be.
You got yourself a deal.
About an hour.
Hi, this is Deena at Chambers Courier.
Good morning.
Yes, this is Chambers Courier Service.
We're running a little bit late today.
The guys who normally pick you up, well,
they threw a rod over at the AM/PM.
We're gonna reroute another crew
to make your scheduled pickup.
We're sending a couple of new guys over.
That's right. Great. Thanks. Thank you.
Last stop coming up.
- Time.
- [Carol] We're just about caught up.
[Alarm Blaring]
This isn't how it was three days ago
when I was here. The gate wasn't closed.
- Maybe we should forget about this one.
- Make a U-turn?
The guard'll be on the phone to
the dispatcher right away. Go on in.
- How're you doin'?
- Not bad.
Big haul.
Yeah.
- Why don't you just put
your John Hancock on this.
- All right, sir.
That box won't fit in the chute.
It's too big.
Oh, man.
You load it up
in the back of the truck.
- That's against regulation.
- We have to do something.
- [Guard] Yeah,
but that's the way we do it now.
- Uh-huh.
Well, I'm new on this run,
and they don't tell me nothin'.
- Why don't you give a buzz
and clear it up?
- No!
That's okay. l...
- Here...
- No, I got it. [Grunting]
- Oh, man.
- Told me they were sending in a new guy,
but you look like you've
been doin' this a while.
- Oh, man.
- I'm ready for retirement.
- You can't let him see you.
- I know.
But nobody's gonna
hire you over 50.
The thing is, what people
don't realize is after 50...
is the best time
to hire a man.
His oats are sown, all the hell-raising
is out of his system.
[Phone Ringing]
Hey. What is that?
Is that a phone?
- [Ringing Continues]
- You better get that.
- I bet you that's your old lady.
- Yeah, look...
You gonna be
all right with this?
- Oh, you bet.
- I'll be right back.
Hi, this is Deena
from Chambers Courier again.
Hey, the dispatcher says
it's your old lady.
She wants you to pick up some milk.
[Chuckling]
She can find me anyplace.
Yeah, look, have a nice day.
That was so cool.
Damn, was that cool.
I mean, that was
so damn cool. Damn.
- You nailed it.
- That's right. All the way.
I had this buddy down in
Florida, bred greyhounds.
He had this one pup.
Dog just finally went
faster and faster and faster.
And one night
on the backstretch,
that dog caught up with
a mechanical rabbit.
Took a mouthful of metal, 220 volts
and dropped like a stone.
Well, I guess he got what he wanted,
but it sure wasn't what he expected.
He caught the rabbit,
didn't he?
- Oh, yeah, he got the rabbit.
- What a bummer.
Just imagine. The moment...
Wait a minute.
[Wayne] What the hell.
[Wayne] Oh, no. No!
How did this happen?
I tied 'em up. That's all I know.
I tied 'em up good.
- Oh, no. Man.
- Wayne!
- Where are you going?
- Well, I gotta look for them.
Aw, come on. Waste of time.
They could be anywhere.
How far is the nearest road?
I don't know. Eight or nine miles.
You rode in with me. You tell me.
If we're lucky, we got an hour
before they get to a phone.
Let's get this thing unloaded.
I tied 'em up.
I tied 'em up good.
Is this yours?
Let's get out of these outfits.
Grab the bags with the big stuff.
Transfer them in the Mustang.
Drop me off at the home and then stash
the dough at your place. Wayne.
Ditch the van near the airport. Make
'em think maybe we're taking a plane.
- Wayne?
- Yeah, yeah.
That was nice work
on the phone back there.
Thanks.
- Nice going.
- Be careful.
Good morning, Henry.
Did we have
a good sleep?
[Indistinct Radio Chatter]
- You know what?
- [Radio Off]
Damn it.
It had to
fall out of my pocket.
Don't worry about it.
We're gonna be okay.
- Yeah, 'cause that's where I put it.
- I know.
- That's where I g*dd*mn put it.
- I know.
And left, kick in.
One, two, three.
And right, in.
Good, Diane.
And left, in.
One, two, three.
And right, in.
One, two, three.
[Woman On Radio]... against
protecting the county's sanction
of the new state committee.
The real story in Oregon,
however,
continues to be
the daring armored-car robbery.
More on this
after a word from our sponsors.
- Trained...
- Wednesday on U...
Teamwork is the key
to succ...
[Man On TV] If you've been involved
in an automobile accident...
- Ah!
- Sorry.
But sources estimate the amount of money
stolen at two million dollars.
Police say they have a number of leads
as to the identities of the robbers.
- Henry.
- Kitty!
- Yeah?
- Mrs. Weiler.
- Wants me.
- You got it.
You gotta hold him.
Sit up, Henry.
[Door Closes]
I just heard it on the news.
They found the van at the airport.
They're looking for two guys
who flew to Miami this morning.
[Phone Ringing]
Hello?
Yeah. I know, I know.
I heard.
Yeah.
We're home free. Bye.
What's going on?
See you tomorrow.
We'll take it from here.
Thank you for taking care of him.
- Poor guy.
- [Carol] We have to do something.
Look, I'm sorry,
but what can we do?
We can't let him go back there.
We have to do something.
No, wait. Now, listen.
There's nothing else we can do.
- We have to do something.
- No, Carol. Just come home.
[Indistinct Radio Chatter]
Aw, jeez.
Hey, lady.
Lady, you all right?
- I'm looking for a friend of mine.
- Boy, that's my girl.
Open it up.
Do it!
- How're you doin', Henry?
- What took you so long?
- Aw, man.
- He's much nicer when he's
in a coma, isn't he?
Why would you do this? Can't you just
tell me why? You have no idea...
I told you to come home!
Just get the money together.
We're on our way.
Do you have any idea
what you just did? Do you?
Carol, when are you ever
gonna start using your head?
Ah!
Where you gonna go?
North, probably,
for a while.
It's close.
Then, I don't know.
Somewhere where it's warm.
What about you?
I don't know.
I've never been
anywhere else.
I'm sorry. It's okay.
You did the right thing.
I'm sorry I, uh,
came down on you.
T-shirts. I got a bunch of
stuff packed. Oh, and socks.
I don't know if l...
I got the money split two ways...
here and the duffel bag in there.
I could use a little help here, Carol.
I got it.
This is just for the road.
I figured we're really gonna
have to make time, so...
We're gonna have to take this stuff with
us, otherwise, it's gonna go to waste.
Anything we can't buy,
we can take with us, right?
- What?
- Well, we can afford it now.
We got the money.
Can I get you a cup of coffee?
Oh. Mustard,
right, right.
Okay. You could argue it's a three-way
split, but I figure what the hell.
Me and Carol make one.
After all, it's just money,
[Laughs] Might as well
throw you a little bone, right?
Did you make
a deal for Carol too,
or just for yourself?
[Indistinct Police Radios]
Cops out there.
I did it for us.
I did it for us. l...
Lloyd-Lloyd said they didn't
care about you and me. Just him.
Somebody's gotta pay,
right?
What am I supposed to do?
I told you to stay away from this guy.
You gotta stay away from him.
I had this worked out...
where we're just gonna
get a slap on the wrist.
Only they're gonna slap her a little bit
harder, seeing as she sprung me.
That's the guy
you call clutch, huh?
All right, that's enough
of this crap.
We're going outside.
I'm not going anywhere.
What?
- I'm not going.
- I'm warning you, Carol.
You'd better
think about this.
I have.
Okay. So you want me
to make you go.
Tell you what.
This time I'm not gonna.
So, what do you say?
We go down in a blaze of glory?
I don't know
about glory,
but we're gonna go down
in a blaze of something.
[Indistinct Chattering]
- Uh, l...
- Okay, Wayne. Put your hands
behind your back.
- What?
- Put your hands behind your back.
- What are you doing, Lloyd?
- I'm arresting you.
Lloyd, Jesus.
Come on.
[Lloyd On Loudspeaker] Come out
slowly with your hands above your heads.
You haven't lived...
till you've heard someone
say that to you.
- [Car Engine Revving]
- Okay, all right.
We've got a situation here.
g*dd*mn it! Oh, man.
The river!
- Get your hands off of me!
- Get in the g*dd*mn car!
[Sirens Wailing]
[Indistinct Police Radio Chatter]
- Aren't you supposed to
read me my rights?
- No, ma'am, you're not a suspect.
Yeah, but... aren't you
supposed to read me my rights?
Yeah, we got a moving violation
on her last year...
fifty in a thirty-five zone...
failure to complete traffic school and
multiple outstanding parking violations.
He has good breeding.
How do I know?
His bearing.
You can tell a lot
about people by their bearing.
I kinda hate to admit it,
but I think he got my watch.
Ladies, please.
This is a crime scene.
- You're kidding me.
- They've ruined the career
of a promising young nurse.
Carol Ann McKay had a future.
You're not kidding?
[Laughing]
[Man] May I help?
It's just that I've
never taken it off before.
Oh. Tsk, tsk, tsk.
It's completely stuck.
Yes, I know. That's why I'm here.
Can you help me?
My assistant is due back
in an hour.
Why don't you return then and we'll
go in the back and cut it off?
Oh, well, couldn't we
just do it now?
I mean, you could
do it yourself, right?
I can't leave the front
unattended.
The security system's
on the blink since this morning.
- They can't figure out what happened.
- I see.
Just my luck.
It's just that I finally
got the courage to do this and...
I mean, it was
a huge chunk of my life.
- College sweetheart?
- High school.
I've never even been with another man.
Imagine that.
Oh, please,
just take it off.
Come on.
Come with me in the back.
We'll be fine.
I'll just lock the door.
- [Buzzer Buzzing]
- You're such a sweet man.
Is, uh... Is he gonna be
all right?
Daddy'll be fine.
I just wish I could've done this
before the... stroke.
But somehow, deep down,
I think he'll know.
[Rhythmic Clapping]
# You're always
dancing down the street
# With your suede blue eyes
# And every new boy
that you meet
# Doesn't know
the real surprise
# Here she comes again
# When she's dancing
'neath the starry sky
# Ooh, she'll make you flip
# Here she comes again
# When she's dancing
'neath the starry sky
# I kinda like
the way she dips
# But she's
my best friend's girl
# She's my best friend's girl
# But she used to be mine
# You've got
your nuclear boots
# And your drip-dry glove
# Ooh, when you bite your lip
# It's some reaction to love
# Here she comes again
# When she's dancing
'neath the starry sky
# Yeah, I think you'll flip
# Here she comes again
- When she's dancing
'neath the starry sky
- Here she comes again
# I kinda like the way
like the way she dips
# 'Cause she's
my best friend's girl
# She's my best friend's girl
# And she used to be mine
# She's so fine
# Always dancing down the street
# With your suede blue eyes
# And every new boy that you meet
# Doesn't know
the real surprise
# Here she comes again
- When she's dancing
'neath the starry sky
- Here she comes again
# Ooh, she'll make you flip
# Here she comes again
- When she's dancing
'neath the starry sky
- Here she comes again
# I kinda like the way
I like the way she dips
# 'Cause she's
my best friend's girl
# She's my best friend's girl
# She used to be mine
# She's so fine
# My best friend's girlfriend
- My best friend's girlfriend
- She used to be mine
- My best friend's girlfriend
- Yeah, yeah
- My best friend's girlfriend
- She used to be mine
- My best friend's girlfriend
- Yeah, yeah, yeah
- My best friend's girlfriend
- She used to be mine
# My best friend's girlfriend
Where the Money Is (2000)
Moderator: Maskath3