12x23 - Mackerel Sky

[bunniefuu]

♪ Heartbeat

♪ Why do you miss

♪ When my baby kisses me?

♪ Heartbeat

♪ Why does a love kiss

♪ Stay in my memory?

MUSIC: 'Roadrunner' by The Animals

- Successful trip, Mr Renishaw? - Very, thank you.

Have you ever been to London yourself, David?

Me? Oh-ho! No. No.

I almost went to Tadcaster once but it er... fell through.

Good Lord!

Yeah, I know. I really wanted to go.

I mean, good Lord, look at this idiot!

CAR HORN

Blimey!

How dare they?

I know. People shouldn't drive like that!

But it was my car!

♪ Yeah, yeah

♪ Take my hand baby

♪ I wanna prove to you that I'm a roadrunning man

♪ Yeah

♪ I wanna tell you something... ♪

- So it was an Aston Martin? - A DB.

- Worth a bit then? - A small fortune.

I only bought it three months ago.

And he has the nerve to pinch it in broad daylight!

Did you get a look at the driver?

Oh, dark hair, sunglasses... It was just a blur.

How about you, David? Did you get a look at him?

No, not really. He was driving like an idiot,

like most people who drive sports cars.

- I beg your pardon? - Oh, not you, Mr Renishaw.

OSCAR: Vernon, where's Bernie?

- Doing a funeral. What's the panic? - My car won't start.

I've been asking him to service it for weeks.

There's nothing I can do about it. He'll get round to it when he can.

I need it now. I've a social engagement.

- Oh, and what's that? - None of your business, Vernon.

There's nothing for it, you'll have to drive me.

I can't drive you if I don't know where I'm going!

It happens to be a charity function at the old folks' home.

A three-line whip for anyone who is anyone in the area.

Well, I haven't been invited.

You don't exactly move in Sir Nigel's social circles,

do you? - Sir Nigel?

Sir Nigel. Sir Nigel Fetherstone.

Our MP. This function is his idea, so get your skates on!

Oh, I see.

No, I can't give you his home number.

But if you want to make contact again give us a call here. Cheerio.

Oh, what was the name again?

Oh, sarge. Colleague of yours from Leeds has just called.

- Really? Who? - Well, he didn't say.

He's trying to organise some kind of reunion.

I see.

He said he wanted to be sure of your whereabouts

and he'll call later to give you the details.

Fair enough.

Right, what's the story with the stolen sports car?

MUSIC: 'Whiter Shade Of Pale' by Procol Harum

VERNON: I ought to charge you for this, Oscar.

OSCAR: You can take that up with Bernie.

They're impressed by your arrival in style, Oscar.

Yes, they will be when I tell them you're my chauffeur.

- Hang on, Oscar! - What?

Perhaps, Oscar, in my new incarnation

as a man of substance and wealth

I may be able to make a contribution.

This is not your scene, Vernon. You won't know a soul in there.

Just come back here at ., pick me up.

An MG taken two days ago from a house in Ashfordly,

a Morgan last week from Dunsford.

So, someone's targeting high-performance sports cars.

Must be.

Anyone locally with previous form for this kind of crime?

The only person I can think of was Graham Poulton.

He was done a couple of years ago for dealing in stolen cars.

They weren't sports cars, they were posh cars,

you know, Mercedes, Jaguars and the like.

He's back in business in Ashfordly, isn't he?

Yes.

Right then, Crane, Bellamy, check him out.

Just excuse me a minute.

What are you doing in here?

Who's the geezer with the dodgy moustache?

The "geezer" is Sir Nigel Fetherstone himself.

You should know that.

His face is hardly off the front page of the Gazette.

I'm a busy man these days, Oscar. If I do read a paper

it's usually the Financial Times, not the local rag.

APPLAUSE Thank you.

Now, I know what some of you are thinking.

Ask an MP to make a speech and he'll drone on for ages,

mostly to make himself sound important.

LAUGHTER

Well, you all know that's not my style.

However, I must take this opportunity

to explain why

I believe this is such an important cause.

Mr Poulton?

That's me.

- Mind if we have a quick word? - About what?

PHIL: There's been a few car thefts in the area lately.

Look, I served my time, I run a straight business now.

- We're not presuming otherwise. - Then why come pestering me?

We just want to eliminate you from our enquiries.

The cars in question were all sports cars.

Aston Martin, an MG, a Morgan.

You can see I've got nothing like that here.

Has anyone offered to sell you cars of that type?

No. And If they did I wouldn't touch 'em with a barge pole.

Well, thanks for your time. You'll let us know if anyone does.

Mm.

And that's why I have always fought so hard

for the elderly members of this constituency.

HE SNORES The sooner we raise funds

to purchase a minibus

for the residents here at St Anselm's the better.

APPLAUSE Thank you.

Blimey, he doesn't half go on a bit, doesn't he?

- Councillor Blaketon. How are you? - Very well, Sir Nigel. And you?

- Thirsty. - Right. I'll get you a drink.

- Good man. - I was just saying, Sir Nigel.

Excellent speech. - Oh, thank you.

I suppose, as an MP, one has to have a gift for oratory.

- I'm sure. - Don't think we've met, have we?

Vernon Scripps. Art Dealer.

Art? What sort of art?

- Oh, my taste is very broad. - Not modern art I hope.

I detest the stuff.

Then you're missing out, Sir Nigel.

There are some giants of the modern era.

Picasso, Matisse, Kokoschka. - Kokoschka?

- Sounds like somebody sneezing! - Yes, very good!

Well, you'll have to educate me sometime.

It'll be a pleasure.

Anyway. Must circulate.

If I didn't know you better, I'd accuse you of sucking up.

And I'd call that the pot calling the kettle black.

- ALF: Oh! Hello, love. - Hello.

- What can I do for you? - Is Dennis around?

He certainly is.

Hello!

I wondered if you fancied going out for dinner tonight?

Oh, I'd love to, but...

Or perhaps I could cook us something.

- Be great. Make it my place? - OK.

- Hi, Jenny. - Hi.

- Any luck with Poulton? - Well, no grounds for suspicion.

I'll see you later.

Well, you'd better do the rounds of all the other

second-hand car dealers in the area.

OK, sarge, we'll go in the morning.

No, you won't, you'll do it now.

So, Vernon, I hear you made a big impression on our MP.

- Has someone been taking the Mick? - Would I do a thing like that?

You didn't even want me to meet Sir Nigel.

- Certainly not. - Why?

Do you know, if there's one thing I can't stand it's snobbery.

I believe in treating everyone the same, prince or pauper.

Don't I, David? - Oh, yes, Mr Vernon.

I'll tell you what, Vernon, if you want to get on

the right side of Sir Nigel, try and help him

with his fundraising. - I might just do that.

Excuse me. You aren't Vernon Scripps?

Yes.

The Vernon Scripps of the Tristram Mackerell paintings?

- Indeed. - I thought so.

I recognised your photograph from the papers. Congratulations!

- Oh, thank you, erm... - Peters. Ralph Peters.

I'm in the trade myself. Deal in old paintings, antiques, so on.

- Really? Can I get you a drink? - Well, thank you.

Gina, can Mr Peters have a drink, please?

Has much been stolen?

Nothing at all, as far as I can see.

That's strange.

But at least Jenny's given us a decent description.

Aye. And I want him caught.

It's not only annoying, it's embarrassing.

I'll have to give some thought to getting you a uniform.

A uniform?

Yeah, well, if you're going to drive me in the Bentley

you're gonna have to look the part, aren't you?

You mean you're going to let me drive it?

VERNON DIALS PHONE NUMBER

Sir Nigel? Vernon Scripps.

We met yesterday at the charity bash.

No, I was the well-built gentleman with Oscar Blaketon, Councillor.

Yes, I've been giving some thought to your appeal.

I've had a bit of a brainwave,

I wondered if we could discuss it somewhere.

Webster's Hotel. Excellent!

I'll be there. Cheerio now.

Are you sure that's the right way up, David?

- Dennis must be upset. - You can say that again.

He takes a dim view of any kind of crime,

but his own home being broken into.

I meant you coming face-to-face with an intruder.

- Oh, I suppose he was. - You don't sound very sure.

Oh, you know Dennis. He isn't really one for showing his feelings.

Not even towards you?

He feels more than he lets on, I'm sure.

But it'd be nice if he'd let it show now and again, eh?

Ah! Sir Nigel. What will you have to drink?

A G&T, thanks.

Large gin and tonic for Sir Nigel. Good of you to spare the time.

As I said, I don't have a lot of...

I quite understand.

Sorting constituents' problems, lobbying ministers...

Actually no, I've got an afternoon's sh**ting arranged.

Oh, I see. Well, all work and no play, as they say.

- So, what's your brainwave? - A grand auction.

We invite the community to donate any unwanted antiques and bricabrac.

We flog it all off and give the proceeds to the fund.

- What a good idea. - And of course,

you could leave me to do the organisation.

Even better.

Any luck with the second-hand car dealers?

- Not so far. - Better tell Merton.

No, let's stay here and have a cuppa.

He'll only send us back out again.

I'd keep out of his way if I were you.

Oh, how come?

Because someone broke into his house last night

and he's not in the best of moods.

Oh. Sorry, sarge.

Sorry doesn't find stolen cars, Bellamy.

Get back on the case. I want results.

VERNON: ...whereas the Surrealists achieved their effect

by depicting ordinary objects in unfamiliar surroundings.

Give me an example.

Let me see, if I were to paint an Eccles cake

inside a budgerigar cage,

then that would make you look at Eccles cakes

in a completely different way. - Would it?

Oh, definitely.

I'm not sure I'm quite getting your drift

but you must know what you're talking about

or you wouldn't have made a fortune.

Well, it's very nice making money, but I must say I've got to the stage

where I'd like to put a bit back into the community.

As have we all.

Which brings us back to the auction. I'll get it underway immediately.

I'm sure the response will be tremendous.

Excellent. Look, I should be blasting pheasant.

I really must go.

Cheerio, Sir Nigel. Good sh**ting.

It'll be Vernon Scripps MBE, before you know it.

Vernon Scripps MBE.

MUSIC: 'Pressure Drop' by Toots & The Maytals

- Ah. Is Ralph around? - Who shall I say it is?

- Vernon Scripps. - Not... not the Vernon Scripps?

- Yes, it is. - Oh! How exciting.

Ralph was saying he'd met you last night.

Ah! Hello there. What brings you here?

I wanted to ask a favour.

I'm working on a major charitable project with Sir Nigel Fetherstone.

- Oh, I see. - We're holding an auction.

Inviting the public to donate antiques and so on.

We thought you might be able to help.

- Well, how exactly? - Well,

I thought in addition to the auction

we could perhaps offer a valuation service.

You know, for people with an heirloom in the attic

want to know the value of it.

- You want me to do the valuations? - For a small charge.

Which of course you could donate to the fund.

I'm right up to my neck at the moment.

Oh, I'm sure you can find time for such a worthy cause.

- Yes, of course. - Excellent.

Hey, cheer up. It's not like you lost your life savings.

It's not just the break-in.

I've got an uncomfortable feeling about it.

And I've got the Chief Super breathing down my neck

about these stolen cars. - Sorry. Obviously the last thing

you want to do is take me out for a drink.

- That's not what I mean, Jenny. - Well, that's how it sounds.

Look, why don't you drop me off and you can get on with your work?

Oh, there's no need for that.

Jenny. - What's going on there then?

- Communication problems? - Who knows?

Well, It's a relief really, isn't it?

What is?

Well, not to be involved in anything like that.

You know, to be free and single.

Ah, just the people I was hoping to see.

I'm organising an auction... - MERTON: Not now.

- There's no need for this you know. - Your attention's miles away,

what's the point?

The response already has been fantastic.

No end of people have rung up offering items.

I'll have a look round at home.

I'm sure I've got something to send in.

What about you, Gina?

I'm sure you've an old antique you'd like to get rid of.

Yeah, only Oscar. And who'd want him, eh?

I heard that.

I'm sure you'll be able to contribute something, Oscar?

Well, I'll think about it. Only Sir Nigel and I

are very keen to make it a success.

Oh! Sir Nigel and I now, is it?

It's as if we've known each other years.

He's joining me for a drink in here tonight.

- Oh, aye? - Don't scoff, Oscar.

Ah! Sir Nigel. - Vernon, good evening.

- What are you having? - Oh, thanks. Usual, please.

Large gin and tonic for Sir Nigel. And get everyone else a drink.

Oh, Sir Nigel, this is Ralph Peters, he'll be doing our valuations.

- Good man. - Pleased to meet you, Sir Nigel.

I hear you've been roped in for auction, Sir Nigel.

I wouldn't say roped in.

When an eminent chap like Vernon comes up with a scheme,

we all need to back it to the hilt.

Well, we're still waiting to hear what contribution Vernon is making.

- Sorry? - You're right.

Well, of course, you'll be putting something into the sale as well.

Yes. Of course.

What about one of your Mackerell paintings?

Tower Bridge. I remember it well.

SIR NIGEL: Excellent.

Now that would make a marvellous centrepiece to the event.

And attract some high-profile dealers to the sale.

Yes, it would.

What a generous chap. What an asset to the community.

- MERTON: I feel guilty. - You don't need to.

You've got work to do. And I do understand.

I hope you do.

What I'm not so sure about is where I fit in?

- What do you mean? - Where's it going? You and me.

I need to know whether you think there's any future in this.

And I don't want an answer now.

But I think we should talk about it... soon.

TELEPHONE RINGING

Aidensfield Police.

Right. Can I take your address, please, sir?

I'll be right there.

RALPH: In here. I went to get something out of the garage

and noticed that the doors had been forced.

- It's vanished. - What sort of car was it?

A Morgan. Bought it only a couple of years ago.

Just use it occasionally.

It's my pride and joy. - I could imagine.

Yours? - No.

That's something for forensics to go on.

We'll get them onto it first thing.

There's been a few sports cars stolen in the area.

So you don't think I'll ever see it again?

We think they're being targeted by a highly-professional g*ng.

We'll do all we can, Mr Peters.

- I could m*rder him! - m*rder who, Mr Vernon?

Oscar blooming Blaketon. He can't get over the fact

that I made a k*lling out of that painting of his.

Only put me in the position where I've had to donate Tower Bridge.

I mean, how can I call myself an art dealer

when I haven't got a single painting left to sell?

I suppose I've got to remember why I'm doing it.

Ah. Raising money for the old folks.

Vernon Scripps, Member of the British Empire.

MUSIC: 'Anyone Who Had A Heart' by Cilla Black

♪ Anyone who ever loved

♪ Could look at me

♪ And know that I love you... ♪

MAN: You can pour one for me too.

What's up with old Dennis? Doesn't he fancy a cuddle tonight?

- Let me go. - Sorry, love, no can do.

You're staying with me till I get what I want.

Thank you very much, Mrs Walser. Most generous of you.

Right. Mr Gardiner, Holly Lane.

Got an antique carriage clock. Reckons it's worth quid.

We haven't a single worthwhile lead

on any of these stolen cars and now another one's gone.

- This is a set up, isn't it? - I'm sorry?

- Who's in charge here? - I am!

You got someone to make that call.

- MERTON: What call? - Earlier this morning.

PHONE RINGS You got someone to call me,

pretending to have a Morgan for sale.

Prepared to accept a low price, no questions asked.

- A Morgan? - Sarge. It's Dr Merrick for you.

Tell her I'll call her back.

Let's get this straight. Someone's offered to sell you

what you believe to be a stolen Morgan?

Yes.

It wasn't us, Mr Poulton.

Please, come through.

This could be the breakthrough we're looking for.

I don't understand. - Did the caller give any clue

to his identity?

No. I just said get lost, I'm not interested.

Did he offer you any other cars?

Just the Morgan.

Right. If he phones you again, it's vital you let us know.

But first, let's get all the details off you.

Do you know, David, it's amazing.

While I was, how shall I put it, on my way up,

people didn't want to give me the time of day.

Now I'm a celebrity, they're queuing up to help.

DAVID: What's up?

- It's gone! - What has?

Tower Bridge!

PHONE RINGING

- Merton. - Dennis, it's Liz.

Oh, Liz, sorry, I was supposed to call you back, wasn't I?

Not to worry. You're obviously very busy.

- 'I am, but what can I do for you?' - Dennis, have you seen Jenny?

Not since last night, why?

She didn't turn up to work today.

Really?

'I've phoned her flat a few times but there's no answer.

'Maybe she's ill?'

- I'd better pop over there. - 'OK. Thank you.'

I'll phone you back.

- Was it insured? - I intended to get it insured,

I'd just never gotten round to it.

What am I going to do? - You'll have to tell the police.

I can't tell the police, the whole world will get to know,

including Sir Nigel. - Well, it's not your fault.

That's not the point.

I promised I'd donate him that painting.

He's got dealers coming from all over to bid for it.

Oh!

Oh, well, that's it, isn't it? I mean, that is it.

Bang goes the MBE.

- Bang goes your what? - Oh, never mind.

What am I gonna tell Sir Nigel?

Unless.

Unless what?

Wait here. I won't be long.

Jen?

Jenny?

Only me.

MUSIC: 'I'm A Man' by The Spencer Davis Group

MAN: So, Dennis, she's not at home. I wouldn't turn round if I were you.

- Who is this? - You'll find out soon enough.

Just drive.

- Where's Jenny? - Don't worry about her, she's fine.

Then just tell me what this is about.

Did you get a message about a reunion?

- Yes. - Well, this is it.

- Who are you? - Let's test your memory.

Eight years ago. Leeds. Bank job.

Acting on information received from a police informant,

two men arrested.

Joe Feeney and...

- Eddie Harvey. - Very good.

- How come you're out? - Turn around.

They've given me six months to live.

They reckon I'm not fit to do anyone any harm now.

- What do you want, Eddie? - Just a name and address.

What name?

There's only one name I want from you, isn't there?

I want to know who grassed us up.

- I don't know. - Pull the other one!

I was just a lowly DC.

Who happened to be the arresting officer.

Key witness at the trial. Of course you know.

Even if I did know it would be more than my job's worth to tell you.

More than your job's worth?

What about the life of your girlfriend?

- If any harm comes to her... - No point making threats

against a dying man, Merton.

You know who it was.

And I want to know where they are now.

Get out.

You've got hours to come up with that information.

If you don't... I should start looking for a new girlfriend.

VERNON: Are you ready?

I can't do this!

Look, David, I know it's a long shot.

All I'm asking is that you try and give it a go.

Well, go on.

Oh!

Keep going.

Sarge. Wondered where you'd got to.

He left me on a lane near Shireoaks farm,

but who knows where he could be holding her prisoner.

- STEVE: How dangerous is he, sarge? - He was bad enough eight years ago,

he and Feeney used firearms on several occasions.

And now he's terminally ill, nothing whatsoever to lose.

Doesn't bear thinking about.

Do you know who shopped him, sarge?

A man named Jim Boyd. We'd been after him for years,

caught him red-handed on a post office raid.

My bosses did a deal. He gave good information

on half the criminal fraternity in Leeds.

Harvey and Feeney amongst them.

It looks nothing like Tower Bridge!

Well, neither does the picture!

I mean, if you want me to paint Tower Bridge

I've got to know what it looks like.

David, you know what Tower Bridge looks like.

It looks like...

Oh! Where's that encyclopedia?

Here. That's what it looks like.

- But... - Well, just use your imagination.

DOORBELL RINGS

Dennis, have you heard anything yet?

I thought you might want some company.

I just keep thinking about her. What she's going through.

Jenny's tough. She'll be OK.

You don't understand. The man's desperate.

If anything were to happen to her...

And it's because of me she's in this situation.

Plus, there's the fact that the last time I spoke to her we had a row.

In the pub? That didn't look like much of a row. I was there.

She was upset.

And she asked me a question

I really should have been able to give an answer to...

and I didn't.

What question?

Doesn't matter.

- VERNON: Mug of cocoa, David? - Shhh!

It's fantastic.

David, it's Tristram Mackerell.

It's incredible!

A few hours, he said. What's going on?

PHONE RINGS

Merton.

Hello?

Eddie.

I've made a few enquiries, yes.

I can't tell you over the phone.

I'm prepared to tell you what I know.

But only if you let Jenny go at the same time.

OK. Agreed.

Tomorrow morning. Hawkshaw Woods.

Come on, David, we should have been there half an hour ago!

It's still sticky.

- We'll tell people not to touch it. - I'm a bit worried about this.

- Why? - Because it's like...

It's cheating.

Look, whoever buys it will be getting something

identical to the original, only newer.

I mean, what's wrong with that?

OK, thank you, sir.

Right. We're due to meet Harvey in two hours.

Division are sending armed support.

They'll have roadblocks on surrounding roads

but they'll keep a low profile.

All negotiations will be left to me. PHONE RINGS

Ashfordly Police Station. Yes.

When you say negotiations, sarge,

you're not actually gonna reveal Jim Boyd's whereabouts?

I couldn't if I wanted to.

Boyd died two years ago.

We'll just have to hope I can persuade him

that as there's no chance of getting what he really wants,

he should let Jenny go. - ALF: Thanks for letting us know.

That was Scarborough police, sarge. Those stolen sports cars,

they arrested a couple of blokes last night

who've admitted taking the cars in this area.

Thank goodness we wrapped that up at least.

ALF: Not quite. They've found a Morgan

but its details don't match Ralph Peters' car.

Ventress, you go over to Mr Peters and see if you can clear that up.

- Yes. - Bellamy, Crane, let's go.

Must be painful to part with it, Vernon? I know the feeling.

Indeed. But I just keep thinking of the cause, you know?

Good morning. All ready to go?

We are, Sir Nigel.

Good Lord. What's that?

That's the painting I'm donating, Sir Nigel.

It looks like something a child could have done. Don't you agree?

Well er...

VERNON: That's true when you first see it,

but of course the more you look at it

the more you realise that beneath that charmingly naive surface

there is a deep and sophisticated meaning.

Oh, aye? What meaning?

I haven't got time to go into that now.

But whoever buys it

will be taking advantage of a major investment opportunity.

Probably double its value in two years.

- Really? - I'm so sorry I'm late.

That's all right, Ralph.

But there are quite a few people queuing up to pick your brains.

Ah! Good.

Are you all right, Ralph?

Yes. Yes. It's just a heck of a painting.

All right everyone, we're ready to start.

AUCTIONEER: . .

Who'll give me ? Thank you, sir.

Any advance on ?

At then, sold.

Sold for £ to the gentleman over there.

We're early, sarge.

Better than being late.

Merton to all units. We're in position here.

AUCTIONEER: And now we shall move on to...

Going a treat, Sir Nigel.

...which is a fine English porcelain teapot,

decorated with nice gold and blue colours,

and a non-drip spout.

CRASH

MUSIC: 'Waltz For Lumumba' by The Spencer Davis Group

What's going on, love?

Is that Ralph Peters' car? - Look, it's nothing to do with me.

- He reported it missing. - I don't know anything about that.

Are you quite sure about that, love?

- He'll k*ll me. - I don't think so.

He's in financial trouble. He's made a claim on the insurance.

And he's trying to flog the car through a dodgy car dealer?

He got nervous about the car still being here outside the house.

He asked if I could put it in my garage.

I see.

What's that?

I think you'd better tell us what else is going on.

Serge.

So... who was he?

His name was Jim Boyd.

Jim Boyd.

Some mate he turned out to be.

So where is he?

He's dead, Eddie.

You're lying.

He was an alcoholic. He died of liver failure two years ago.

- You're making this up. - I'm not, Eddie.

I have a number for his widow.

As soon as you've let Jenny go you can phone her for confirmation.

You think I'm falling for this?

Just let her go, Eddie, and get out of here, eh?

Not till I know the truth.

Dennis!

- Eddie. - Stay there!

Stay there!

He's gone. He still has Jenny with him.

No one take any risks.

That's over £ raised already.

- Splendid. - Now for the big one.

AUCTIONEER: And now for the highlight of the auction.

Lot No .

An unfinished painting

by the celebrated artist Tristram Mackerell

entitled 'Tower Bridge'.

Generously donated by the organiser of this function,

Mr Vernon Scripps.

Now, where shall we start? £? Thank you, sir.

MUSIC: 'Little Pretty Thing' by The Troggs

Put your foot down!

Faster!

♪ I wanna love you like a lover should

♪ Sugar-lips taste so sweet... ♪

Come on! Faster!

£,.

£,.

This is one of the most fashionable artists in the country, remember.

,. Thank you, sir.

£,.

Come on.

TYRES SCREECH

Go on! Go through it! Don't stop!

Drive straight through it!

Come on! Drive through it! Come on!

Steve, they've broken through the roadblock.

They're heading towards Collinby. - Roger, Phil.

Do I hear £,?

Are we all done? Are we sure?

£,.

Go left. Do as I say!

- I can't! - Do as I say!

JENNY: Will you get off? Stop it!

For the first time, and the second...

Will you get off!

Just... Please!

Sold to Sir Nigel for £,.

Jenny.

Are you all right?

Thank heavens.

Congratulations!

You've certainly got a bargain there, Sir Nigel.

Well, as Vernon says, it's an investment first and foremost.

But in any case, it's growing on me already.

Vernon. If you don't mind, I really ought to be getting off.

Oh, fine. And thanks very much for your help.

- It's a pleasure. - Ralph Peters?

- That's right. - I'm arresting you

on suspicion of attempted deception and theft.

What?

You're not obliged to say anything unless you wish to do so.

But what you may say may be put in writing

and given in evidence.

- There must be a mistake. - Well, clearly there must, Alf.

This man's a friend of mine.

Maybe you should choose your friends more carefully.

- What? - He's nicked something of yours.

- Good Lord! - What?

LORD NIGEL: Good heavens.

Can you explain this?

I really thought I'd had it.

You know what the moral of the story is, Jenny?

If you want a quiet life, don't get involved with a copper.

Well, maybe I don't want a quiet life.

I think you've had enough excitement for one day, don't you?

JENNY: Maybe.

And maybe it's time we got you home.

Are you sure you're going to be all right?

Nothing that a good night's sleep wouldn't sort out.

- Night then. - Good night.

So, Oscar, what's all this about Vernon's painting?

Huh! How long have you got?

- Good for them, eh, Gina? - How do you mean?

Well, sarge and Jenny being all lovey-dovey.

Hang on a sec, Phil. It was only the other day

you were saying how glad you were not to be involved with anyone.

Yeah, well. You know I didn't mean it.

- Honest? - Course not.

Good, I'm glad.

- Night cap? - Oh, definitely.

I don't want you to be on your own tonight.

You'll stay over?

That conversation you wanted to have.

Oh, look, don't worry about that now.

- There is something I want to say. - What?

I love you.

Marry me.