Alien Xmas (2020)

[bunniefuu]

[Christmas melody playing]

[Santa] "…and laying a finger
aside of my nose,

I gave him a nod
and up the chimney I rose!

I sprang to my sleigh,
gave my flight team a whistle,

and away we all flew
like the down of a thistle.

But I gave him a shout,
ere we drove out of sight,

Merry Christmas to all…"

[kids] And to all a good night.

-Yay! [laughing]
-Yes! h* h* h* h*!

-[clock chimes]
-Oh, would you look at that.

-Time for bed, little ones.
-[kids] Aww…

Come on, Santa, one more story.

I don't think so.
What would your parents say?

They won't care.

-We won't tell.
-Please?

h* h* h* h*! You must have heard
every Christmas story there is by now.

Although, there is one tale
you may not have heard.

Honestly, it's kind of…

crazy.

You kids wouldn't want to hear
a crazy Christmas story, would you?

[kids] Yeah!

[all laughing]

[eerie sci-fi music playing]

[Santa] Once upon a time, there was a race
of aliens known as Klepts.

[alien gibbering]

[Santa] Long ago, they were colorful
creatures from a beautiful planet,

-but they grew greedy.
-Ah!

They plundered all their home planet

-had to offer…
-Hmm. Hmm. Hmm?

-…and their color faded away.
-Aw…

So, they took to the stars…

moving from galaxy to galaxy,

swindling, stealing and snatching
whatever they could.

[dramatic music playing]

The poor Klepts had no concept
of kindness or joy.

All they ever felt was greed.

But the more the Klepts had,

the more they wanted.

[chuckles] They even stole
from one another!

-Ah!
-X was the smallest of the Klepts,

-but he was also the sneakiest.
-Ah.

Ha! Ah.

-[Santa] But no matter how clever X was…
-Huh?

-…he was still the smallest.
-[laughing]

-[yelps]
-[X laughs]

Huh? Aw…

[clamoring]

[alarm blaring]

[Santa] X was an excellent thief…

-but because of his size…
-Ah!

…the other Klepts

-never took him seriously.
-[laughing]

Aw…

[Klepts murmuring]

[playing metallic fanfare]

[Santa] The Klepts' supreme leader
was a nasty piece of work,

-mean, greedy, and dangerous.
-[throne whirring]

Her name was Z.

And Z was about to reveal

-her most diabolical plan yet.
-[staff clangs]

Klepts, a fabulous treasure
is within our grasp.

This is Earth,

the most stuff-filled planet
we've ever seen.

-Alone and unguarded…
-Ooh!

…in the vastness of space.

You almost feel sorry for it.

[chuckles] Almost.

We will build the ultimate weapon:
the Gyrotron!

[Klepts] Ooh!

[Z] At the magnetic North Pole
of the planet,

-it will obliterate the planet's gravity.
-[beeping]

All the stuff on the surface
will float out into space,

where we will be waiting to snatch it up.

We will stuff their stuff
into our stuff chambers,

and then their stuff will be our stuff!

[Klepts cheering]

One of you will go to Earth
and assemble the Gyrotron.

[Klepts stop cheering and groan]

And let me remind you
that failure will be…

frowned upon.

Any volunteers?

[Santa] X knew that if he could
steal more stuff

-than any Klept in Klept history…
-Hmm!

…they would finally be forced
to take him seriously.

You're volunteering?

I was hoping for someone a bit taller.

-[Klepts laughing]
-Oh…

[guffawing]

Hmph!

Okay, the job is yours, little Klept.

Impress me.

-[staff clangs]
-[whirs]

[laughs evilly]

[X screaming]

-[clattering]
-[X grunts]

[groans]

-Huh? Ooh!
-[beeps, whirs]

[Santa] X had been assigned
a Semi-Automatic-Multi-Tasking-Unit,

-or SAMTU.
-[X grunting]

[Santa] And little did X realize just how
helpful SAMTU would turn out to be.

Mmm! Ow! Ooh!

-[beeping]
-[engine charging]

Ow!

-[squeaking]
-[barks]

[Santa] Of all the places
to build their weapon of doom,

the Klepts chose the North Pole…

right in the heart of Christmas Town…

just two days before Christmas Eve!

And who would be the first line
of defense

against this alien invasion?

A handful of elves.

[cheerful Christmas music playing]

[barking]

[panting]

[girl giggles] Hold still,
let me put your ribbon on.

[woman] Now, say "ah."

[girl] Mom, help!

Try your father's auto-bow.

Point it at the puppy
and push the button.

His gadgets are great… mostly.
[chuckles]

[gasps] Yay! You look perfect!

-Mom, we can't give this one away.
-[panting]

Look at those eyes.

-Giving is what Christmas is all about.
-I know.

But she's such a good girl!

[Santa] When X laid eyes
on Christmas Town,

he didn't see magic and wonder.

He only saw all the stuff

he could steal.

Oh! Ooh!

Whoopee!

[chimes]

Huh? Oh!
[giggles]

[Santa] It's in a Klept's nature to steal,

-so, Christmas Town was a paradise for X.
-Wow!

As SAMTU led him to the precise
spot where they would build the Gyrotron,

X couldn't help but pilfer.

[grunts] Oh… Hmm.

Oh… Ah!

[giggles] Mmm-hmm. Whoo-hoo!

[Santa] X didn't know it, but he had
arrived on a particularly special night.

[fanfare playing]

On the other side of town,
I was presenting our newest invention.

You're on, big guy. Three, two…

Hello-h*-h*, everyone!

And thank you for coming.

I know how busy you all are,
but you're my family,

and I have something
incredible to show you.

Everybody loves a baby!
They're soft and cute.

So, it's no wonder the planet is bursting
with more kids than ever before.

Friends, we need a faster method

for delivering gifts.

I had a vision, a dream!

I saw us bringing gifts to every girl
and boy on the face of the Earth

at the speed of light!

[elves] Ooh!

And with the help
of our lead mechanic, Obie,

-we have made my dream a reality!
-[applause, cheering]

Elves, snowmen,
citizens of the North Pole,

may I present to you,

the deluxe, fully loaded,

gravity-defying Santa Super Sleigh!

I named it myself.

[applause]

-My dad made that!
-Yes, he did.

-Boo!
-Boo!

Okay, here we go.

[engine whooshing]

[elves] Ooh!

h*-h*-h*-h*!

-Hi! Oh! Oh, that's not good.
-[alarm beeping]

-[engine backfiring]
-Oh!

-Whoa!
-I have a feeling that this year

will be the most crackerjack Christm--
Ahh!

[screams]

-Whoa! Santa! Watch out!
-[screams]

[laughing]

Not good.

[all screaming]

Let me turn the… No! Ah! Whoa!

Okay, okay, no, it's okay.
No, no, no, no.

[engine fizzling]

[engine gasps]

Santa?

h*-h*-h*-h*-h*!

Santa, are you okay?

[chuckles] Well, that wasn't
part of the plan, but it was fun!

Everyone okay?

Sorry, the light-speed booster
still isn't quite up to--

Christmas Eve is tomorrow!

How will we deliver gifts
without the Super Sleigh?

[chuckles] There's plenty of time!

By midnight tomorrow, the sleigh
will be in perfect working order.

[clatters]

I have full faith in Obie.

Okay.

Yeah.

-Are you okay?
-I'm fine. I just--

I really gotta get back to work.

Wait, you're not coming home?

I can't, I… I'm sorry.

The sleigh is my responsibility,
and I can't let Santa down.

But I'll be home later
to tuck you in. I promise.

Okay, I understand.

Noelle, I'm… I'm trying my best.

We know you are.

I'll make it up to her. I'll find her
the best Christmas gift ever this year.

The only gift she wants is you.

You get that sleigh fixed
and come home to us.

[rattles, hisses]

-[sighs]
-[clatters]

[X straining]

-Huh? Oh… Mmm…
-[beeping]

Huh?

Ooh!

[straining]

-Huh! Wow!
-[machinery whirring]

[X] Ooh!

-[doll 1] Mama.
-[doll 2] Papa.

Huh? Ah!

[chuckles]

Hmm.

[yelps]

Ah! [straining]

Whoo! Whoo!

Ah! [grunts]

[doll] Mama.

Mama.

[yelping]

-[clatters]
-Ah.

[screams, grunts]

-Oh… Oh!
-[whirs loudly]

[yelps]

[grunting]

[groans]

[straining]

Oh…

-[groans]
-[beeping, whirring]

Oh…

[yelps, screams]

[Santa] It was just one more day
until Christmas.

My flight crew and I made the final plans
for our first light-speed delivery.

[whirring, clatters]

But not everyone
was feeling the Christmas spirit.

And back home,
Obie's family was missing him.

[SAMTU whirring]

[X] Mmm-hmm! Mmm-hmm-hmm.
Mmm, mmm.

Mmm! Eh?

[whirs, beeps]

Eh?

Huh?

[rattles]

-[rattles]
-Uh-huh.

-Huh? Oh…
-[power hums]

Ah! Ah! Ah!

[SAMTU continues whirring]

[Santa] One downside
of the gravity-destroying Gyrotron

is that some assembly is required.

Ah!

Eh…

Mmm-hmm. Huh…

Hmm.

[yelps, grunts]

[groans]

[groans sadly]

-Mmm!
-[taps softly]

-[taps loudly]
-[whirring]

Ah!
[gibbers]

[Santa] Whenever a Klept
is completely out of options,

their final resort is to play dead.

It was X's job to assemble the Gyrotron,

-but he had better things to do.
-Hmm.

So, he reprogrammed SAMTU
to do the job for him.

[beeping]

[whirring]

[ratchet clicking]

[thumping]

Mmm…

[Santa]
X knew his mission was top priority,

but he couldn't stop thinking

-about Christmas Town.
-Ooh.

[SAMTU continues whirring]

[Santa] Up above him,
there was so much stuff just waiting,

begging, to be taken.

[X chuckles]

[grunting]

Ah.

Uh-huh.

[straining]

[grunts]

Huh? Ooh!

Oh…

[giggles]

-[grunting excitedly]
-[Obie] Santa,

I don't know what's wrong,

but the light-speed booster
won't work.

I know my calculations are right, but…

-Maybe they're not.
-[X groans]

[Santa] I'm sure they're perfect.

-If anyone can do this, it's you.
-[X gasps]

-[Santa] I'll let you get back to work.
-[Obie] Okay.

Thanks, Santa.

[sighs]

-[squeaks]
-[gasps]

Hello?

Somebody there?

[X] Hmm. [gasps]

[Obie] Hello?

-Oh.
-[gibbers]

Oh, just a toy. What are you, a doll?

Mama.

-Nice.
-Papa.

Hey, hey! I know someone
who's gonna just love you.

h*-h*-h*-h*!

Holly? You up?

[sighs]

Good night, Sugarplum.

Sorry I haven't been, uh…

I'm just sorry.

[Holly] Mmm.

[whispers] Merry Christmas.

[Holly] Hmm.

[door closes]

Huh?

Oh…

[chuckles]

-[yelps]
-Mmm.

[straining]

-[Santa] In that moment…
-Huh?

…X felt something
he'd never felt before.

-Something he didn't even have a word for.
-Ah…

But we do.

-It was love, pure and sweet.
-Ah.

[straining]

X wanted to forget
about this strange feeling.

But like it or not, he was trapped.

[groans]

[grunts]

[straining]

Ah.

[gasps]

Ah.
[gibbers]

[thuds]

Who are you?

Dad, Dad, it's perfect!

How did you find it?

Oh.

Where's Dad?

Work? That's okay.

He needs to fix the sleigh, I know.

Oh, did you see what Dad got me?

I did not.

It's a doll!

And I don't quite know what kind of doll,

but I think
there's something special about it.

[Santa] There's nothing quite like
Christmas Eve in Christmas Town.

There's a spirit of joy

that spreads through every household.

A deep appreciation for those we love

and the precious time
we get to spend together.

These feelings were brand new to X

-and made him feel awfully strange.
-[tinkling]

[gasps]

[grunting]

[doorbell rings]

-And as the day went on…
-[elves caroling]

…X witnessed everyday acts
of kindness and generosity.

He saw how the elves loved to sing songs,

give gifts, to smile and laugh.

What utterly strange creatures
these elves were.

There was so much
wonderful stuff to steal!

They should be taking, he thought.

Yet they were not stealing a thing!

It all made no sense to X.

[SAMTU whirring]

[eerie music playing]

[chuckles quietly] Ah.

[grunts]

-[Holly] Are you leaving, too?
-Huh?

You don't have to pretend.

I knew you could walk.
You're not very good at hiding it.

It's okay. You can have whatever you want.

It's just stuff.

-Why are you leaving?
-Um…

Do you have to go to work, too?

That's okay. I understand.

Wait here.

Huh?

-[panting]
-Here you go.

Nobody likes being alone,
especially on Christmas.

-[barks]
-Hmm.

[panting, barks]

[barks, panting]

Ugh. Ah.
[laughs]

[Santa] X finally understood
how wonderful it was to receive a gift.

-It was so much better than stealing!
-[gasps]

Because a present
wasn't just meaningless stuff.

It meant someone cared about him.

-[tinkling]
-[gasps]

An act of love like that?

Well, it didn't just change X
on the inside.

Hoo-hoo!

[giggles]

[Santa] X felt amazing!

And he wanted, more than anything,
to share this feeling,

to show Holly
that he cared about her just as much.

But what could X give her
that she didn't already have?

Hmm.

[Holly sniffles]

As they raced through Christmas Town,

-X told Holly everything.
-Whoa!

He told her about the Klepts
and Supreme Leader Z

-and what he was sent here to do.
-What?

[growls]

He told her he wasn't
going to do that anymore.

Instead, he'd come up
with a wonderful new plan, just for Holly.

[Holly] Whoo-hoo!

[laughs]

-[rumbling]
-[gasps]

Whoa.

[creaking]

[grunts]

[grunting]

[machine powering down]

[creaking]

[beeping, whirring]

X, look out!

-[X grunts]
-[barking]

[beeping]

-[X] Whoo!
-[SAMTU beeping, whirring]

[X] Huh?

[sighs]

Be careful.

[beeps]

[Santa]
With SAMTU successfully reprogrammed,

X was ready to begin his plan.

Dad? Dad?

[X] Ah. Aha.

Uh-huh?

-[scanner beeping]
-[X] Mmm-hmm. Mmm-hmm. Hmm!

Mmm-hmm. Ah.

I don't know where my dad is.

-[barking]
-Whoa!

With a new sleigh, our delivery time
will be cut by 90%!

Uh… Santa?

Obie? Is everything okay?

Well, not exactly.

I… I couldn't fix it.

I tried everything. It just won't work.
My math must have been wrong, and I…

I'm sorry. I…
I failed you, and I ruined Christmas.

I've put a lot of pressure on you
this year, haven't I, old friend?

I have, and I'm sorry.

How about we look at this sleigh together
and see what we can do.

What do you say?

Hey, Santa?

Uh, just in case we can't get the sleigh
to work, do you have a plan B?

h*-h*-h*! Nope.

Fixing the Super Sleigh
might have been difficult for Obie,

but for SAMTU, light-speed engine repair

-was well within his programming.
-Ah.

[X chuckles]

[giggles]

Yoo-hoo!

You did it! You did it!

Obie, you were pranking me!
[laughs]

How wonderful!

[X chuckles]

Uh… I, uh… Just a second, Santa.

Dad!

-What's going on? How--
-It was X! The doll you gave me.

He's not a doll, he's an alien!
He came to steal.

But I gave him a puppy,
and he changed colors!

And he has a robot.

The robot was doing bad things.

X reprogrammed him, then we
came here, and his robot fixed the sleigh!

I… But why?

So we can all be together on Christmas.

That was X's present to me.

[sighs]

Thank you.

[Santa] X was the first Klept in history

-to give a gift…
-Hmm.

[tinkling]

…and it felt even better
than he had hoped.

The little alien was imbued
with the spirit of Christmas.

The fully-loaded Super Santa Sleigh
was ready to rip!

And Obie and Holly were together.

-h* h* h*!
-[Holly] Whoo-hoo!

[Santa] A perfect,
happy ending for our Christmas tale.

[energy blast fires]

[all gasp]

[whimpers]

I never said
this Christmas story had a happy ending.

-I said this story was crazy!
-[elves screaming]

Bet you forgot about old Z, didn't you?

[chuckles] Well, she didn't forget,

and was here to finish the job.

Activate the Gyrotron!

Destroy Earth's gravity
and take everything!

Alien attack! Retreat!

There's too many of--

Secure the north wall
with the Ice Brigade!

Aerial reindeer support to the west!

The battle for Christmas Town had begun.

Aha!

[yelling]

[screams]

[gibbering in fear]

[grunting]

[snowman] Yeah!
[laughs]

-Mom's at the kennel! We have to go!
-You're right. Stay close!

[Santa] X knew that the Gyrotron

-could still be activated…
-Ah!

-…so he sent SAMTU to check on it.
-[beeping]

-[Klepts gibbering]
-Whoa!

Get the sleigh to safety!

Nobody messes with my holiday!

Hi-ya! h* h* h*!

[power humming]

Whoo!

[giggles]

Whoa!

[blasters c*ck]

[gibbering]

[power hums]

Oh! Oh, boy! This complicates things.

[growls]

-Let's round them all up.
-[barking]

Come here, little guy.

Heads up. Puppy coming your way.

This is kind of fun,
once you get used to it.

-[Holly gasps]
-[Noelle] What's wrong?

We got this, Mom.

[grunting]

[grunts]

[grunts]

[Holly] Yes!

-[barking]
-[gibbering angrily]

[Klepts exclaim]

[warning beeping]

-Ha!
-[blasters c*ck]

-[dings]
-[all gasp]

Ahh!

-[blows landing]
-[Klepts gibbering]

[gibbering angrily]

Ahh!

[eerie music playing]

[energy crackling]

-[beeping]
-[thuds]

[X] Whoo-hoo-hoo-hoo!

Yeah, ha, ha, ha!

Will someone please blast that miserable
thing out of the sky?

[X whooping] Ah!

-Oh, no!
-[X screaming]

Ooph!

[crashes]

-[gibbering gratefully]
-Forget about it.

It's what we do.

[X] Whoo!

[grunts]

[giggles] Aw.

-[blasters powering up]
-Ahh!

[growls]

[Santa] It was a devastating loss.

Christmas Town had fallen,

and the Klepts were triumphant.

[staff clanging]

[doll squeaks] Mama.

[echoing] X!

Come closer so I can see you.

You deviated from my plan.

Klepts!

I would like you to meet your new

-Vice Supreme Leader!
-Huh?

X has shown more unscrupulous treachery

-than all of you combined.
-Huh.

He assembled the Gyrotron,

gained the trust
of these moronic creatures

and led us right to the
best stuff we have ever seen!

-[Z cackles]
-[Santa] Once upon a time,

this would have been everything
X could have ever wanted.

But when he saw Holly,

X knew what he had to do.

-[puppy barks]
-Huh?

-[panting]
-What are you doing?

What in the-- Ah!

-[staff clatters]
-Ugh. Huh?

Huh! Huh…

-[puppy whimpers]
-Aw…

What's happening to me?

I feel so… warm.

-[tinkling]
-It's… It's…

it's wonderful!

-[laughing happily]
-[elves gasping]

[Santa] For so long there had been
an emptiness

-inside the Klepts…
-[growls]

…that no amount of taking
could ever fill.

-[squeaks]
-Merry Christmas.

-[Klept] Hmm… Hmm! Aw…
-[Santa] But now, thanks to X,

that hollow space was filled with love…

and transformed
by the spirit of Christmas.

Yes, it was this new concept of giving

that changed the Klepts.

Merry Christmas.

[tinkling]

[Santa] They were restored to the colorful
creatures they once were.

-[all cheering]
-[Santa] h* h* h*!

[Noelle] Mmm.

[X] Huh?

[Santa] It's Christmas.

The sun's coming up.

Children will wake up,
and there'll be nothing under their trees!

And there's not enough time
to deliver the gifts.

[whimpers]

[Santa] Yes, that little X
surprised them all that day.

Hmm.

[Santa] He may have been
the smallest of Klepts, but it turns out

-he had the biggest heart.
-Ah!

[grunts]

[gibbers]

[engine powering up]

[Santa]
And as dawn broke on Christmas morning,

the world could never have predicted
just how special,

how unique, how…

[chuckles]

…alien it would be.

The Klepts helped deliver toys
in an armada of spaceships.

Faster than the speed of light!

Just like my vision!

[chuckles]

Sort of.

It was all thanks to a little girl

and an even littler alien,

and a whole lot of love.

And that is the story
of the very first Alien Christmas.

The end.

Aw…

[upbeat music playing]