06x20 - I Love the Nightlife

[bunniefuu]

You smell like musk and roses.

And you smell of passion and promises.

I never make promises I cannot keep.

Of all the women at the club

why did you come to me?

I could feel you watching me.

Was I that obvious?

Not at all.

Subtlety intrigues me.

Mmm...

Mmm...

Are you what you promise?

Are you what I think you are?

And if I am?

Then I want to be with you.

I want to be like you.

Are you sure?

As sure as I've ever been about anything.

Then I have a gift for you.

A gift of eternal life?

A gift of experience.

Who are they?

What...

Shh.

Remember...

I know your deepest desires.

Better than you do yourself.

Vrykolakas!

Fool.

So what did we do?

Lose a bar bet with vice?

I told you, all their female ops

are too recognizable.

If we want to drag

this knife-happy pimp

out of hiding, then...

I know, I know.

We got to give him

some fresh meat to strong arm.

I don't mind being bait, okay?

I just wish I could do it

in clothes my own size.

Well, I would have volunteered myself

I just...

I just look lousy in spandex.

Heads up, cass.

You got company.

Excuse me, miss.

Listen, I'm sorry, miss

but you have to leave.

What are you, block captain?

You own this corner?

This is my responsibility

and you're in the way.

Well, it's a free country

in case you skipped the fourth grade.

It's a private construction site.

I see, you work for the man.

I work for the man, too.

You know what I mean?

Lady, you've probably got a kid to feed

and a boyfriend on dr*gs

but you can't stand here.

This isn't what it looks like.

I'm a police officer

on an undercover assignment.

I don't care if you're
inspector clouseau in drag.

Move your pert little butt...

Now!

Sorry, Mr. Foreman, but I outrank you.

I can't talk you into decorating

some other job, huh?

Uh-uh.

Okay, fine.

Good luck to you.

It's not funny!

Ryan, grab Esther Williams and follow me.

We've got a d.B. Over on biscayne road

that requires our attention.

Oh, we're with you, Harry.

So... where's the body?

Lipschitz: Samantha devereaux...

, single.

Owner and operator of bain et toilette.

The joint that sells $ bars of soap

to the worth Avenue crowd.

All this from selling soap.

The victim did have sex

but there's no evidence of sexual as*ault.

Kinky sex, hanging from the balcony.

Why couldn't they use the chandelier

like everybody else?

If it wasn't the maid's
day to dust up there

she might not have
been discovered for days.

What was the cause of death?

Cause of death, looks
like a skull fracture.

And it looks like the blunt object

walked away with the perp.

There's a couple of things.

Yes?

Well, for one, she was
dead before she got up there.

Then how did she get up there?

Somebody throw her over their shoulder?

That's exactly what it looks like.

And the other thing

there were puncture marks in her neck.

Two of them.

So... did forensics I.D. the fingerprints

in the bidet queen's bedroom?

Nothing yet.

Do vampires even have fingerprints?

No, cass, you're
thinking about reflections.

And by the way

there's no such thing as vampires.

Of course not.

But let's not say anything

to the press about the
puncture marks, okay?

Could you see the headlines?

"Undead... alive and well in palm beach."

Well, just keep an eye out

for count Dracula's address in her book.

There's nothing exciting here.

It's mostly customers.

Check her handbag.

Women are always tucking cocktail napkins

with my phone number in those things.

They are.

Gorilla-gram for sergeant

Cassandra St. John!

Gorilla-gram for sergeant
Cassandra St. John!

That's me.

Hi! You must be the girl o' my dreams.

Get it? Girl o' my
dreams... gorilla my dreams.

Now.

♪ Oh, Cassandra,

I'm sorry as can be ♪

Ha-cha-cha-cha-cha.

"Please join me for dinner at
the L'Hermitage this evening.

David Luna."

Who's David Luna?

Half-moon construction, Luna...

Half-moon... Mr. Foreman.

The guy that poured water on you?

You're kidding me.

You tell your boss he ruined

a perfectly good pair of vinyl go-go boots

and I'll be taking it out in filet mignon.

That's a yes?!

That's a yes.

He'll go bananas!

You're not going.

Well, when was the last time

you took me to L'Hermitage?

Hey.

What?

No phone numbers

but how about an address?

Bar sinister

ocean parkway, palm beach.

She ran a tab there
only hours before death.

Wow, it's just about the witching hour.

Why don't we run by the bar sinister joint?

See if they make their
bloody Marys out of real blood?

Ugh.

Nice place.

You should bring your date here.

Yeah. Maybe I will.

Excuse me.

Do you mind if I ask you a few questions?

Yes.

Let me rephrase that.

I'd like to see some I.D.

For the young lady at the end of the bar

the very young lady.

What?

This woman was here last night.

Her name is Samantha devereaux.

So?

Did she talk to anybody?

Did she leave with anybody?

Yes... and yes.

They know.

Thank you.

I'm sergeant Tom Ryan.

Sergeant St. John.

Palm beach P.D.

Lilith...

Tara.

Chatty Cathy there

says you know this woman.

Mm... no.

Does anybody here speak in full sentences?

Forgive me, sergeants.

I don't know her

but, um...

I've seen her.

Last night.

She was in deep flirtation
with the prince of darkness.

The who?

Beautiful konstantin.

He is...

Strigoi morti.

He's a professor at the university.

European antiquities.

Very...

Erudite.

Women are...

Drawn to him, moth to flame.

Brains are so sexy.

They left together?

Perhaps. Why don't you ask him?

Oh. Do you know where we can find him?

Try the morgue.

Sorry?

The archives

at the university library.

Konstantin vrykolakas.

He has an office there.

Thank you. You've
been very helpful, ladies.

Mm-hmm.

Thank you.

Madame?

Thanks.

I got it.

What?

I'm trying to picture a
hard-hat on that jacket.

Ah, you were expecting me in denim overalls

maybe a baseball cap with the name of

a tool company on it?

Uh-huh.

I got some of those.

I started my contracting
career taping drywall

and I never want to forget what it's like.

Thank you.

So that's why you were out there

in work boots this morning.

Nah... that was because I
was supposed to meet you.

Luna: Thank you.

So, anyway, you were saying?

Yeah. Um...

Men are...

Afraid is the wrong word.

Intimidated by strong women.

You think so?

Oh, I know so.

You know, guys they, they...

Want take care of you.

To be the protector.

How do you protect someone

who carries a g*n and a badge?

Bigger g*n.

Don't laugh.

Most women cops marry other cops.

Well, why haven't you done that?

I did.

Okay.

Where's he?

Um... back at the precinct.

Ex-husband... current partner.

You're kidding.

Nope.

How's that working out?

Well, it's not as bad as you think.

We got married because
we were great friends.

But it was a mistake,
it was a huge mistake.

But we're becoming better friends now.

I like it

when you do that.

What?

Smile.

Lipschitz: What?

Those are the autopsy results?

Mm-hmm.

Am I going to like them?

Um, maybe yes, maybe no.

Tell me the good parts first.

I'm confirming skull fracture
as the cause of death.

Blunt object.

And we found flecks of
gold paint in the wound.

Oh, that doesn't sound too supernatural.

Any dr*gs in the system?

Our old friend, rohypnol.

Roofies, huh?

And...

Something else.

I found dicumerol.

Dicumerol, is that the
latest date-r*pe drug?

It's an anti-coagulant.

Keeps the blood from clotting?

You see, your corpse
was about two quarts low.

Cassy: Okay, tell me about

this guy we're going to see.

We're going to see professor konstantin

vrykolakas...

Possibly the last person to
see Samantha devereaux alive.

Professor vrykolakas?

Please, sergeant, call me konstantin.

Vrykolakas is such an unhappy name.

Unhappy? Why?

In Greek legend

vrykolakas were sinners,
excommunicated by the church.

After death, they fed upon their loved ones

and were finally

released from their misery.

Released how?

Traditionally.

A stake through the heart.

Konstantin it is.

How well did you know

Samantha devereaux?

I'm sorry?

Who's that?

You left bar sinister with her

last night.

Samantha?

She said her name was Serena.

And what happened after you left the bar?

Very little.

I saw the young lady home.

I kissed her hand at the door.

I said good night.

It was quite early, perhaps : A.M.

Tom: You say : A.M.

Did you see anyone parked on the street?

Did she seem worried

or indicate that she was expecting someone?

Not at all. She said she
was sleepy from the wine

and asked me to telephone her sometime.

Which I would have done.

Something has happened to her?

She was m*rder*d.

m*rder*d!

Mm-hmm.

Can anyone corroborate your story?

I believe I spoke to Lilith landru

after I returned.

Would you like her number?

Uh, yes, please.

And the vrykolakases

are, uh, vampires?

No.

There's no such things as vampires.

Thank you for your help, professor.

If you remember anything else, call me.

You smell like musk and roses.

Are you a creature of the night?

As I am?

Walking...

Always restless?

Desperately seeking our own kind?

Tom: So far this case

is one dead end after another.

What do you think of konstantin?

Do you think he's real, or...

Bela lugosi, junior?

I buy him as the doer but
he doesn't tie to the scene.

There's no fingerprints
and no physical evidence.

He just turned into a bat
and flew out the window.

I don't think so.

Well, you know a difference
that makes no difference

is no difference.

What are you getting at?

Do you remember that
case over in lake county?

What, the vampire cult kids?

Exactly. Kids who read too much Anne rice

thought they were vampires
and offed their parents?

But they weren't vampires.

But their parents were just as dead.

St. John.

Hi.

Oh, I don't know, after the other night

I may not eat for a month.

Okay, but this time I pick the place.

Yeah, me, too.

Okay. Bye.

Where you taking him?

Huh?

David Luna, where are you taking him?

I thought my place.

You going to cook for this guy?

Mm-hmm.

I thought you liked him.

Ha, ha.

Ryan, St. John, my office.

We got another one.

It's a carbon copy of devereaux.

Puncture wound, a sedative

and missing blood.

Except this time she wasn't
hanging from the ceiling.

No, but the m.E. Said her
fourth and fifth vertebrae

were crushed to sawdust.

This perp has the strength

of an ox, a herd of oxes.

Oxen.

Whatever.

The good news is, they I.D.'d a print.

Tara kildare.

Go.

Find her, talk to her.

Make this case go bye-bye.

Cassy: Mr. Stoker?

Palm beach police.

We're looking for an
employee of yours, Tara kildare.

Well, join the search party.

She's missing?

For three days

along with bucks from the register

and enough rohypnol to stock

the Kennedy compound.

Is that it?

No short stock on, say, dicumerol?

Well, yes, but, uh

it's probably just an inventory error.

I mean, what would anyone want

with a six-month supply of anti-coagulant?

Tom: Thanks for your time.

Cassy: I wish I could tell you

more about the case

it's creepy, but we're trying
to protect our identifiers.

Identifiers?

What are they, like, snitches?

Well, they're not a who, they're a what.

Some detail only the real k*ller

would know.

Keeping them quiet helps
weed out false confessions.

People confess to
crimes they didn't commit?

All the time.

And the more vicious the
crime, the more confessors.

It's the collective guilty conscience

of our times.

Oh, here it is, here it is.

Eighth grade.

See, I told you I was a dork.

Sorry, not even close.

Cassandra St. John, I
have a confession, too.

What?

I am totally...

Falling for you.

There's one other thing I should tell you.

I'm married, cassy.

A wife.

It's kind of a big thing to slip your mind.

We're separated.

We've been separated for about six months.

You could have told me.

I didn't...

I didn't want to scare you away.

What's she like?

Where did you meet her?

What does she do?

Do I get to call my lawyer?

Sorry, I...

Nah, nah, I'm sorry.

We met in college.

She's a sculptor.

At least, she wanted to be a sculptor.

She doesn't do much of anything lately.

Why not?

Take your pick...

Epstein-barr disease

chronic fatigue syndrome

bipolar disorder...

Whatever the latest trendy label is

for not wanting to face life.

I had to get out.

I was suffocating.

Cassy...

Do you know

how invigorating you are

after / years of that?

I mean, you grab life by the throat.

You takes risks every day.

Well, you know what they say.

"Fools rush in..."

Let's rush in, cass...

You and me.

It's right, isn't it?

Are you game?

Truthfully?

I'm terrified.

Good.

Me, too.

Try the big silver one.

Tara kildare, you're under arrest

for robbery and possession
of a controlled substance.

Come with me.

Lipschitz: You don't get it, do you?

This is not just some
penny ante burglary beef.

You have to let me go.

Please.

Those dr*gs were used

in the commission of a m*rder...

Two murders!

It wasn't me.

I didn't do it.

But you know who did, don't you?

Then spit it out.

He'll k*ll me.

Harry.

Tara...

No one's going to k*ll you.

We'll protect you.

You can't.

He's much stronger than you are.

You can't hide from him.

From who?

Konstantin.

He's strigoi morti.

Again, the Sci-Fi channel!

It's true, they're immortals.

Our blood gives them powers.

They can mesmerize.

No one mesmerized you.

It was the dr*gs.

The rohypnol you stole, it's hypnotic.

No, you don't understand!

He's real.

I understand.

He feeds off energies of humans

and when he makes love to you

you become like him.

Oh, great.

Now she's a vampire, too.

And if you lock me up in here

I will die with the sunrise.

Skipper!

Skipper, come here.

His department hasn't seen or heard

from professor konstantin
since day before yesterday.

Hmm, come here.

What?

Come here!

What?

What is that?

It's from frannie.

For what?

For luck.

We heard maybe you met your beshert.

The guy... your soul mate, huh?

Oh, oh, oh...

I don't know Harry, it feels good.

Good.

Thanks.

Yeah.

What is that?

What is that smell?

What smell?

What is that?

You... have you got your pockets

stuffed full of garlic?

Oh, no, I do not!

Yes, you do.

I do not.

It happens to be garlic chicken

from chao praya.

Okay. Yes.

Okay, the chicken.

Yes.

Right.

Check out Harry the
vampire slayer's Cologne.

Harry, nice Cologne.

How would you feel about interrogating

miss magenta again?

Well, you can try.

I just don't think you're going to get far.

Why, will she shrivel
up and die in the light

like she promised?

Nope, she called a lawyer and made bail.

But that was a m*rder charge.

God, bail must have been...

gs-collateralized in antique jewelry

by one Lilith landru.

The purple Princess?

You're kidding me.

Am I smiling?

Go, find her, maybe she's
seen the nutty professor.

I'd love to, Harry, but I
don't have an address.

I don't have an employer of record

and I don't have a social security number.

Oh, well...

Then I guess you'll just have to try harder

won't you, Thomas?

St. John.

Woman: Cassy St. John?

This is Miriam Luna.

David's wife.

Did something happen to him?

No, I just want to talk to you.

Um, talk to me?

What about?

I want you to leave him alone.

Well, i'm, uh...

Boy, that's just the
catch phrase of the week.

I'm not doing anything to him.

We're... we're friends.

I know what you are.

I'm asking you.

He's my husband.

No, Miriam, he hasn't
been that for a long time.

You can't take him from me.

I can't make it without him.

That's not true and you know it.

Please, I need him!

And what about me?

Maybe I need him, too.

I don't care about you!

You told them about me, didn't you?

My chosen one

my bride

you betrayed me.

No, it's not true.

I didn't do it.

I had to go into hiding.

Can you imagine how hungry I was?

I had to drink from a cat!

It was humiliating.

I didn't do it!

It was Lilith.

Lilith told them.

You are too in love with this life, Tara

to save yourself like this.

What can they do to you?

How can they hurt an immortal?

I'm not an immortal.

I'm just a regular person.

Go away.

Go away and leave me alone.

David Luna.

You're kidding.

How bad?

No, no, I'll, uh

I'll be right there.

Yeah.

I'm sorry.

It's an emergency.

I have to go.

Something fall off a building?

It's Miriam.

She tried to k*ll herself.

Ryan: Who is it?

It's cassy.

Come on in.

Hate to waste a good bottle

of beaujolais.

What happened to your date?

Got called off on account of su1c1de.

Thanks.

She slit her wrists, huh?

Mm-hmm.

Has she done this before?

Oh, I didn't ask.

How did she cut herself?

Side to side or up and down?

Well, they said stitches

so I guess it's the short way.

That means she's done it before.

Well, what makes you so sure?

Because you don't die from big stitches.

Sorry.

This wasn't a su1c1de attempt.

She threw a temper tantrum.

You know, you're not being very sympathetic

towards Miriam.

Nope. No, I'm not.

Because I've seen people like this before.

This woman's a black
hole, she'll suck this guy dry.

Then there's nothing left

for me.

It's not fair, is it?

Ryan.

Yeah, Harry.

Yeah, okay, yeah.

We'll be right there.

Konstantin's running out of options.

He's surrounded and
he can't jump in his coffin.

Why not?

Heads I go in the front.

Tails you go in the back.

Vrykolakas?

We know you're in here.

Why don't we just do this the easy way?

I've been alive for twice years.

You think you can scare
me with this cap p*stol?

Konstantin vrykolakas, you're under arrest

for the m*rder of Samantha devereaux.

You have the right to remain silent.

You have the right to an attorney.

Lawyers are no good to me.

They are bloodless.

Ouch.

What fools you mortals be.

You think you can hurt me?

You're here to serve me, nothing more.

I'm tired of this game.

Lilith, come.

The bolt is made of wood.

You know what to do.

Lilith, what are you thinking?

I'm tired of this game, too.

Hurry.

Pull!

Lipschitz: Ryan, St. John!

Cassy: Over here.

Skipper.

Bulletproof vest.

Lipschitz: Check this out.

Fake fangs.

My cousin morty was a dentist all his life.

Nobody every asked him to make fangs.

Well, they weren't really vampires

but they were still K*llers.

You'd be dead if it weren't for me.

Well, I appreciate it, Lilith

but you should have taken up lifesaving

just a little sooner.

Have a seat, Lilith.

Have a conversation with Molly there.

You can sit tight until your arraignment.

I'm sure I'll manage to amuse myself.

I've been waiting for you.

It was kind of a rough night.

Yeah, for me, too.

Miriam's going to be fine.

Good.

I knew she would be.

We've decided, um...

We're going to do a trial reconciliation.

I'm sorry.

I wish it was different.

I wish it was different, too.

Hypnotic dr*gs...

Bulletproof vests...

Cosmetic dentistry...

All this I get.

What about the strength of ten?

What, you mean throwing
the body up there like that?

Yeah.

Strength of three do it?

Yeah, I guess.

So where is our creature
of the night this morning?

Well, we stuck her in

with another denizen of the dark

miss Molly Margaret O'Malley.

No.

Yeah.

The world's most incompetent hooker?

She can't help it, she likes cops.

So where's the suspect?

Harry.

Hmm?

Guard!