03x27 - Country Cousins: Parts 1

[bunniefuu]

Uh, what is all this?

We are cleaning
out the basement,

so if there's anything you want
to keep, you better grab it now.

And you better hurry up before miss
toss it all out gets her hands on it.

Hey, look.

Hey, that's me. I
was 4 years old.

I was so cute.

Yeah, what happened?

Hey, look at this old newspaper.

Ow.

And that girl... I remember her.

Oh, yeah.

That's your cousin, Betty Jane.

Betty Jane. That's right.

We used to play
together on her farm.

Hey, whatever happened to her?

Um, yeah, we used to...

We used to visit
with them all the time.

We were really close.

And then, suddenly,

they just stopped talking to us.

Why? What happened?

After our last visit, they
stopped returning our phone calls,

they returned our letters
and our Christmas cards,

and they never invited
us back there again.

Like they were
complete strangers.

Cousin Raven,

I been waiting all these
years to see you again.

Oh, my goodness. I just
had a vision about Betty Jane.

I was on the farm, and she
said she was so happy to see me.

I don't know how
that's gonna happen.

I know. I'll write her a letter,

and I'll tell 'em
that I'm coming.

I'm sure they'll be
thrilled to hear from me.

The nerve of that girl
inviting herself down here

after what that
family done did to us.

Now hush, delroy.
Now, this girl right here,

she's trying to make the peace.

We gonna welcome
her with open arms.

Oww!

I said open arms.

Let's go.

♪ If you could gaze
into the future ♪

♪ future, future ♪

♪ you might think life
would be a breeze ♪

♪ life is a breeze ♪

♪ seeing trouble
from a distance ♪

♪ yeah ♪ go, Rae!

♪ But it's not that easy ♪
♪ oh, no ♪

♪ I try to save the situation ♪

♪ then I end up misbehavin' ♪

♪ ohh, whoa, oh ♪

♪ hey, now, say now ♪

♪ 'bout to put it down, yeah ♪

♪ come on and
ride with Rae now ♪

♪ you know the future
looks great now ♪

♪ and everything's
gonna change now ♪

♪ that's so Raven ♪

♪ it's the future I can see ♪

♪ that's so Raven ♪

♪ it's so mysterious to me ♪

♪ that's so Raven ♪

♪ it's the future I can see ♪

♪ that's so Raven ♪

♪ it's so mysterious
to me, yeah ♪

yep, that's me.

Thanks for coming along, Chels.

Are you kidding? A
chance to be on a real farm

and walk for what seems
like forever on a hot, dusty road

till your feet get
blistered and sore.

Wouldn't miss it.

You know what? They
said that it should be close.

It's only a stone's throw
away from the bus station.

Oh, well, then...

ahh, Chels, nice toss.

Thank you. I always
had a good arm.

You know I was star pitcher
at vegetarian baseball camp.

Man. Ahh, well,
think you found it.

Ahh, there it is, Chels,
just like I remember.

Whoa, that's one
creepy scarecrow.

Oh, yeah, I remember
him. That's Percy.

They used to tell us
this really scary story

about how at night,
when the moon was out,

Percy would come to
life, sneak into your room,

and steal your soul.

Chelsea?

Chels, come back here, girl!

You know I got heels
on. I can't run after you.

Chelsea!

Knock knock. Anybody home?!

Knocky knock.

Hey, Raven Baxter
in the farm hizzouse!

Oh, my goodness. I
remember this place.

And, look, there's a portrait
of my great-great granddaddy.

That must be them.

Oh, my goodness, they're probably
throwing me a welcome party.

Ok, act surprised.

I'm ok.

Yep, we are definitely family.

Cousin Raven.

Cousin Vicky?

Look at you, all growed up.

And I'm guessing
you must be Chels-ea.

Wow, you're a good guesser.

Ok, try this one. I'm thinking
of a number between one...

Hey, Chels...

I didn't mean to startle you.

I was fixing some boards
in the guestroom, and, uh...

Make sure you mind that hole.

Ooh. Yeah, Chelsea, you're
in charge of minding that hole.

What? Why am I always in
charge of minding the hole?

We was very surprised

to hear from your side of
the family after so many years.

Well, you know,
family is very important,

and I had a "feeling"
that we would reconnect.

Oh, well, yeah,
I guess it's time

to forget about the
past and move on.

Yeah, what did
happen in the past?

I said forget about
it and, uh, move on!

Ok, moving on. So
what can we do to help?

Oh, why don't y'all go help
Betty Jane with the milking?

Ahh, milking?

Like, a cow?

Oh, my goodness, I
have the perfect outfit.

Hey, Cory, I'm making me an
Eddie special. You want some?

Yeah. What's in it?

A little tomato, you
know, lettuce, Turkey...

Pretty much everything
but the light bulb.

Ok, well, count me in.

This is really cool, you staying
here while your mom's out of town.

It's like I finally
got a big brother.

It's like I finally
got a little brother.

Unh, unh, unh, unh.

Who needs to learn how to share.

Hey, wanna make
some crank phone calls?

Yeah, I'm down for
whatever. You know me.

Ok, I'm gonna call the health club
and see if they have any dumbbells.

I know that one,

and then you ask 'em,
"are they as dumb as you?"

That's good.

I was just gonna see if
they had any dumbbells.

Hey, guys, what are you up to?

Oh, uh, we were just
calling the library, Mr. B.

Yeah. They're still
open, right, Cory?

Uh, yeah.

They're still open, and
they've got lots of books left.

You guys are going
to the library, huh?

You know, just keeping
our options open. Right.

Cool. That's better than
making crank phone calls.

Oh, ho ho. You got it.

We're growing up.
Yeah. Funny, funny.

Man, thanks, Eddie.
You had my back.

Raven would've sold
me out in a heartbeat.

Well, you know, that's
what big brothers are for.

Yeah, man.

Sandwich race.

Now remember, Trixie,

no matter what cousin
Raven's family done did to ours,

auntie Faye says
we have to be nice.

Thanks for listening.

Hi. I'm Chelsea.
I'm Raven's friend.

Raven'll be down in a minute.

Hi. I'm Betty Jane.

Nice to met ya. And
who's this beautiful girl?

Aw, this here is Trixie.
I think she likes ya.

Yeah, I know. I'm,
like, a total cow magnet.

Oh, ok. Wanna milk her?

Really?

Yeah. Come on,
pull you up a stool.

Ok.

Wow. Honey, you
pretty good at this.

Yeah, my uncle has a farm.

I've milked all kinds of
things, cows, goats, roosters.

But you can't milk a rooster.

That one didn't really
work out too well.

Right. So, what's taking
my cousin so long?

Oh, she's picking out her
special cow-milking outfit.

What kind of an outfit
do ya need to milk a cow?

Hey, y'all.

Got milk?

What is buzzin', cousin?

Ooh, there you
are, all dressed up...

Like a cow.

Well, you know how I moo.

See, the thing is, this
here is a workin' farm.

We gonna be
milkin', not modelin'.

I get it. Overdressed.

Just a tad.

Rae, Rae, you've gotta
try milking. It's so much fun.

Oh, ok, ok.

So I guess this is
the pump right here.

Something coming out?

You see, Raven, the
milk's in the udders.

The other what?

Them thangs underneath the cow.

Ha, I knew that, cousin.

Just a little family fun. You
know how we do. Ha ha.

All right, so, um...

Now grab them there.

You mean that right
there? Mm-hmm.

See, we just met. That's a
little bit too personal for me.

Rae, it's really
easy. Just do it.

Yeah, just pull and squeeze.

Ew, ew, ew.

Oh, ew, ew. Unh, ew, ew.

Ehh, ficky, ficky, ficky.

Ha ha ha ha. How am I
doin'? How am I doin'?

Great, except there's
no milk coming out.

Maybe she's empty.

No. See, you gotta...

Pull and squeeze
at the same time.

Oh. Like this...

I got it!

Yeah, so did I.

Oh... My milk!

Come back here. What are you...

My milk!

Aah!

My bad. Let me help.

Help me!

Ok. Chels, she's stuck.
A little help, please.

Don't worry. This
happens to me all the time.

Yeah, it's only
gonna hurt a little bit.

Ow!

Ok, maybe a lot.

There you go.
That wasn't too bad.

Cousin Raven, I've been waitin'
all these years to see you again.

I knew you were gonna say that.

And now I can't wait
for you to leave! Mama!

I didn't know she
was gonna say that.

I can't believe I got
off to such a bad start

with Betty Jane.

Rae, don't be so
hard on yourself, ok?

You know what? I'm
sure she's forgotten

all about it by now.

Uh!

I'll never forgive what
cousin Raven did to me!

Mama, my head hurts!

Oh, I'm sure she didn't mean it.

Not, hold still, Betty Jane.

This ice'll take
down the swellin'.

Ohh!

At least cousin Vicky's
on your side, Rae.

Oh! Try to get the boot!

Ow!

Raven!

My bad.

Want some of my ice, mama?

Oh, hush up.

I just can't win
with these people.

Rae, listen, you came here

to end a feud
between your families.

They know your
heart's in the right place.

You know what?

You're right, Chels.

Yeah.

I can't give up.

I just have to make sure

I don't do anything
else to insult them.

Mm-hmm. Or hurt them.

Exactly.

I just have to fit in.

Yeah.

Starting with the
way that I dress.

Yeah, yeah. You know what?

That's a good
idea, actually, Rae.

For dinner, you
probably shouldn't wear

anything with sequins or
studs or glitter or feathers...

This could be a problem.

Oh, oh, ooh, oh!

Hey, man, your
shoelace is untied.

Oh, yeah!



Man, Raven never
lets me win at sockball.

Thanks.

Let you win? Cory, I didn't...

Right, right, I let you
win. That's what I did.

Well, you know, that's
what big brothers do.

Ooh! I'm sorry.

Uh, guys, we're going out
to dinner with the coopers.

Oh, and remember, Victor.

It's their turn to pay the bill.

Yeah. How come they
always go to the bathroom

when the check comes?

I got to remember that one.

Anyway, we won't be late.

All right, mom.
Have a good time.

Ok, sweetie, and remember,

Eddie's in charge.

Hey, don't worry. I got
everything under control.

Hey! I got it.

This time, we go to the
bathroom when the check comes.

Mama like the way you think.

So, uh, what do you
want to do, Cory?

Want to write some rhymes?

Well, you know, we could
go down to the arcade

and hang out with my friends.

No offense, Cory,

but I don't want to hang
out with a bunch of little kids.

Ok, well, I'll just
go by myself.

Whoa, whoa, whoa,
whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa!

I don't think your
parents would let you

go to the arcade at night alone.

Man, Eddie, come on.

I'll be back before
they even get home.

They'll never know I was gone.

No, my brother.

I think that's a bad idea.

Man, you're soundin'
just like Raven.

What's the fun of
havin' a big brother

if he's just like
your big sister?

All right, man.

You got one hour.

Thanks, Eddie. You're the best.

Well, I know.

Just bring me back a
corndog, my brother.

I'll being you 2, cool bro.

Aw, man, now I gotta
play with one hand.

Talk to me.

Cory, you're late!

What if your folks come
home and you're not here?

Man, I don't know! Cover for me!

What am I supposed to say?

Man, I don't know.
You'll think of something.

Eddie, come on, don't
be like that right now.

I'm goin' for a new record.

Oh, oh... Bye.

No worries. My big
brother's got my back.

He had better get my corndog!

Now, y'all remember,

be nice to your cousin Raven,

no matter what bonehead
thing she might have did to you.

I mean it!

Wait, now, now.
Don't waste that ice!

Put that in the sweet tea.

Hi. I'm Chelsea.

Hey, child!

Why don't you sit
down and join us?

Well, thank you.

Raven'll be down in a minute.

She's just changing.

Oh, who is this
cute little thing?

Hi!

I wouldn't get too close
to baby g if I was you.

But she's so adorable.

Shake it, shake it!

Ow!

A bull's-eye. Aah!

Hey, y'all!

Eww!

Gal, this here is dinnertime.

Why are you dressed for milkin'?

I'm sorry. I was
just tryin' to fit in.

Well, you don't.

Delroy! Hush up!

Now, come on and
grab a seat, child.

I'm your auntie Faye,

and this fool right
there your cousin delroy.

Fool?!

You gonna let that woman
call your husband a fool?

She just tell it like it t-i-is.

I can't hate on it.

La-la-la-la-la!

Uhhh-unh!

And this little gem right here,

this here's baby g.

Oh! What's the "g" stand for?

"Girl."

See, cousin...

Well, that's what it
said on the hospital tag,

and we all
thought it kind of fit.

Oh! Well, she is really cute.

Cootchie-cootchie!

Careful, Rae.

Booyah!

You weren't supposed to duck.

Well, now, let's eat up, ok?

Ok, ok.

Betty Jane, fix your
little sister a bottle.

Ok, mama.

Here you go.

Aah! Ha ha! Aah!

Yeah, baby, you
like it, don't you?

Yeah.

Mmm! This Mac and
cheese is slammin'!

I hope that means
that you like it.

Oh, I love it.

LooKit there.

Least that girl got
good taste in the food.

Yeah, that's good.

It's always nice
cookin' for family.

Ohh! They called me family.

You're on a roll. Keep going.

Mmm! And I love these potatoes!

Can somebody pass the gravy?

Did you just say the "g" word?

What, y'all don't like gravy?

Ohh!

Lord!

What's wrong with gravy?

No!

She keeps sayin' it, mama.

Make her stop!

Now, child, now, child,

listen to your auntie Faye.

We don't speak of the
"g" word in this house.

Why not?

Why not? It's
'cause of your daddy!

That's why not!

Wait a second now.

What does my daddy
have to do with the...

You know.

It rhymes with "travy."

Tell you somethin'
about your daddy, girl.

Last time your daddy
stepped foot in this house

was the last time we saw
that antique gravy boat.

I can't believe this
whole family feud

is over a gravy boat.

Uhh!

Not just any gravy boat!

But your great-great
grandpappy's gravy boat.

Yeah, see...

That boat right there, child.

That boat was in our
family for generations,

through the good
times... Uh-huh.

Through the bad times.

Well...

From the heartache... aah!

To the supper!

See, the point is,

that boat was always here.

Now it ain't.

Plus...

It poured a nice
puddle of gravy.

Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.

And we all saw your
daddy eyeballin' it.

Next thing you know,

that gravy boat gone missin'.

My dad is not a
gravy boat thief!

Yeah! And he's
no eyeballer, either!

Well, now, child,

now that the situation
is on the table,

the finger of suspicion
does point to your daddy.

But I've never
even seen the thing.

Oh, no, I'll tell you why
you ain't seen it, child.

That's 'cause
your daddy sold it.

That's why you're
livin' up there

in that big ol' house
in San franciscie.

And we have never... Had g...

Gravy again.

Oh, honey, I'm sorry.

That child done
hurt your feelin's.

You gonna get over it.

I was so young,

I don't even remember
what it tastes like!

Child, it's ok.

You done made
me lost my appetite.

Me, too.

Me, too!

Oh, now, now, see
what you done? Lord!

You had to go and
say the "g" word.

I think coming here
was a bad idea.

You think?

You nasty!

Aah!

Ow!

Little gremlin.

♪ Yeah! ♪