01x02 - The Honeymoon's Over or Now What?

[bunniefuu]

Whatcha doin'?

Just getting things
ready for the newlyweds.

Aw, I can't believe my
little girl's married.

Can you believe she's pregnant?

I'm gonna be the only
aunt in seventh grade.

My grandmother made this when
your father and I first got married.

She wished us a long
and happy life together.

Well, we know it's
not a magic pillow.

They're back!

Hey! The montgomerys are here!

We missed you so
much! Oh, me too.

We had the best
time in galveston.

We swam and
walked on the beach...

And bought matching
puka shell wedding rings.

Nothin' says eternal
love like the puka.

You know, I always dreamed
of having a honeymoon in hawaii,

But van showed me that it doesn't matter
where you are, as long as you're in love.

Oh, van, that's beautiful.

Yeah. You spend most of
your time in bed anyway.

Oh!

Okay. Well, um,

I've been fixing up the room.

Actually, I was gonna talk to you
about that. Since my room is so small,

And your room, it's so much bigger,
and with dad being gone, no. No.

I just thought,
you know... Let it go.

It doesn't matter
where we sleep.

Anyplace is fine as long as
I'm with... My wife. My husband.

My lunch.

Notice anything
different about the room?

Oh, mom! Meemaw's pillow!

Mom! Thank you. You're the best.

Thanks for being so
cool about all this.

Hey, I'm cool. So I'll get outta
here and let y'all get settled in.

Honeymoon's over.
School's tomorrow.

We still got tonight.

Come on, mom.
You're not this cool.

♪♪ [country]

♪ my roots are
planted in the past ♪

♪ though my life
is changing fast ♪

♪ who I am is who I want to be ♪

♪ a single mom who
works too hard ♪

♪ who loves her
kids and never stops ♪

♪ with gentle hands and
the heart of a fighter ♪

♪ I'm a survivor ♪♪

All right. Here's what
you do. Take your pancake.

Slap some ham on top.

Roll it up.

And you've got
yourself a vanwich.

Look, mom. I made a vanwich.

- You like having him here,
don't ya?
- Yeah.

Well, I don't. I had to
listen to cheyenne...

Making a vanwich last night.

I beg your pardon?

Shows what you know. We
didn't even do anything last night.

We did it this morning.

Cheyenne, there
are children present.

i'm present.

Ah, ah, ah!

Not at the breakfast table
or anyplace else I can see it.

What's wrong with showing affection?
Isn't that what married people do?

Depends on how long
they've been married.

Van. How do I look? Mm.

muy caliente. [giggles]

That's spanish for "good."

Van, honey, I have to
look better than good.

I have to wear something that
says "mrs. Van montgomery."

How about "I'm with stupid"?

Kyra, you two go brush your
teeth. You're gonna miss the bus.

Hey, van, where's your ring? I
can't play football with a ring on.

What about all day? You don't have
to play football till after school.

You want me to wear a
puka shell ring to school?

- You wore it in galveston.
- Yeah, I wore your bra
in galveston.

- Just for...
- Ah! Uh-uh.

Van, I thought you
liked your ring.

I do. It's just, you know, I don't
usually wear rings to school.

But I will today,

So everyone will know I married the most
beautiful girl at westchester high school.

Oh!

- [Clears throat]
- am I the luckiest girl
or what?

Check back with me when
you've been in labor for 36 hours.

[knocking]

Hey. Hey.

Kids get back from their trip
okay? You mean honeymoon.

That just sounds so dirty.

You should've been
here for breakfast.

Say, have you seen
my bowling ball?

B.j.'S church is having their
bowling for jesus fund-raiser.

Don't start.

Check the box in the garage marked
"crap that don't belong here no more."

Ah! When you knocked
up your hygienist,

You lost the right
to touch my muffins.

[Knocking] brock, sweetie,

I hate to interrupt, but I
really have to... Wee wee.

Go ahead.

Oh, you're a peach.

- "Wee wee"?
- Oh, what have you got
against her?

[Scoffs] [phone ringing]

Hello?

Yes, this is cheyenne's mother.

Sure. No, you don't have to
call him. I'll tell him. Okay. Bye.

That was cheyenne's school.

The principal wants to talk to both
of us as soon as possible. What about?

They wanna change the school
colors! What do you think it's about?

All right. I'll drive. Come on.

whoo! Who knew a baby
the size of a peanut...

Could play such heck
with your bladder?

Brock?

Reba?

Well, hello.

Mrs. Hodge, I'm sorry I didn't inform
you about cheyenne in advance,

But things have
been a little crazy.

Oh, you don't have to tell me. I
saw the honeymoon polaroids.

But there's no
need to apologize.

You know, I'm one of
cheyenne's biggest supporters.

She's been a wonderful student,
and that's why I want to help her now.

The holly house school
for pregnant teens?

It provides a
judgment-free environment...

For women like cheyenne
to continue their education.

Good lord. Look at
the size of those desks.

Is this really necessary?

Well, we have to think about
what's best for cheyenne.

For those who don't fit in, high
school can be a very cruel place.

You should see the way they
treat the fat kids. [Chuckles]

Mr. Brown brought that
nude model to art class again.

Oh, dear. This
may take a minute.

Feel free to sit there
for as long as you need.

I should've shut down that
fine arts department years ago.

What were we thinking, sending cheyenne
back to school like nothing's happened?

I haven't had time to think,
what with planning a wedding...

And trying to figure out
where to put everybody...

and going to the grocery
store six times a day.

Yeah, it's been
rough on both of us.

I don't know how you've managed.

Reba, do you really think cheyenne
could be happier if she stays here?

Well, it's not gonna be easy, but I don't
believe in running away from a problem.

Well, this isn't you, reba. This
is cheyenne we're talking about.

She's 17. Until now, her biggest
worry's been how to hide a zit.

Yeah, that's true. She sure can't
hide this problem behind bangs.

The looks we were getting out there are
gonna be a hundred times worse for her.

The most important thing
is for cheyenne to graduate.

And if this is the
best place for that,

Well, then I guess we should
at least discuss it with her.

You know, who knows? She
might even like holly house. Yeah.

I mean, look at all those
happy pregnant women.

Oh, my god! Barbra jean!

i am not going to a special
school, mom! I'm not a freak!

Nobody said anything
about freaks.

Man, those girls are huge!

Mom, this is my senior
year, the best year ever.

Cheyenne, this is not gonna be the
senior year you've dreamed about,

Unless stretch marks and
hemorrhoids were part of that dream.

Mom, ew.

Well, I just don't think you
understand how hard this is gonna be.

Believe me, I understand.

Today I watched scarlet stevens take
my place as cocaptain of the drill team.

My high kicks are so
much better than hers.

It's true. She can kick a juice
box off the top of my head.

Cheyenne, scarlet stevens
is only the beginning.

Your friends, your teachers,

They might say
things, hurtful things.

I know. Before we even got
back from our honeymoon,

Kelsey parks told
the whole school...

The only reason van married
me was 'cause I was pregnant.

- Jump in at any time.
- I was chewing.

- [Sighs]
- cheyenne, you gotta admit,
it was a reason.

Well, not the only reason.
He also loves me. Right?

Right. I don't want cheyenne
going to that place either.

A husband and wife belong
in the same high school.

Mom, please? I can handle it.

I really want to
graduate with my friends.

All right.

If that's your decision,
I'll support you. Thank you.

So how's the room working out?

Oh, it's good. Van fell in
between the bed a couple of times.

Once when we weren't
even doin' anything. Yeah.

I really gotta stop
askin' questions.

I appreciate your concern.

We know it's gonna be tough,
but cheyenne is determined to stay.

Maybe I didn't
make myself clear.

I wasn't simply... suggesting
that cheyenne go somewhere else.

Then what were
you... suggesting?

I was hoping you could make
this decision by yourself,

But I see that I'm going
to have to make it for you.

You can't kick her out of
school for being pregnant.

No, but I can suspend
her for three weeks,

Which should be enough to ruin her grade
point average and keep her from graduating.

Suspend her for what?

You need a reason? How about
toilet-papering the school?

- The entire drill team
admitted to that.
- That's not the way I heard it.

You know, I'm beginning
to believe all those

Things I read about you
on the bathroom wall.

Well, I'm not
interested in what you...

Or those... Liars think of me,

Only in maintaining the
reputation of my school,

Which does not include pregnant
girls parading through the hallways.

And what about the boys
that got 'em that way?

Setting limits has always
been the girl's responsibility.

You know the old
saying... Boys will be boys.

Yeah, I'm familiar with it.

I've just never known anybody
stupid enough to repeat it.

This discussion is over.

I wouldn't be so
sure about that.

[susan peters] perhaps we should
get started without brock.

He'll be here. [knocking]

- Hey. Sorry I'm late.
- There he is. Now you can start.

[barbra jean chuckling]

Maybe I should sit over there.
I don't want to get in the way.

Too late.

hello. I'm barbra jean.

You brought her?

It's 106 degrees in the
car. Crack a window.

My, isn't this cozy?

Well, shall we start?

Well, they kicked
me out of school.

Cheyenne, sweetheart,
I don't understand...

Why you'd wanna go to a
school that doesn't want you.

Maybe coach is right, cheyenne.

Easy for you to say
since you get to still

Play football and
graduate with your friends.

Oh, that's not van's fault.

God built women to carry
babies and men to carry footballs.

You are just precious.

It's not fair. Why am I the
only one that has to suffer?

I'm sorry, but what am I supposed to
do? Quit school and stay home with you?

- No.
- Yes.

- What?
- That's exactly
what you're gonna do.

As long as cheyenne's
suspended, you stay home.

No school and no football.

No football? That's ridiculous!

Pulling van out of school isn't
gonna make things fair for cheyenne.

Wanna bet? Reba, the whole
school is counting on him.

There's no way the wildcats can
go all the way to state without van.

Exactly.

Nice.

- What?
- Oh, she said, "nice."

If the game's as important as you
say it is, it's only a matter of time...

Before mrs. Hodge invites van
and cheyenne to return to school.

Go, mom!

Are you sure about this?

I'm sure. What's more embarrassing
to a texas high school?

A pregnant teen
or a losing season?

Ooh! I know.

The booster club has made over a
hundred phone calls to mrs. Hodge,

And she has shown no
signs of backing down.

Now, the game
starts in 10 minutes.

I should be busting through
the big paper "w" right now.

I love runnin' through
the big paper "w."

She's gonna call. She's
just makin' us sweat.

I know this is the right
thing. Just have a little faith.

[doorbell rings] oh, thank god.

No, no, no. Let me. I've been
looking forward to this.

[Growls]

Down, kitty.

No call yet? Y'all, pregame warm-ups
are over. They're about to kick off.

Oh, now you hear
that? It's kickoff.

All right. The assistant coach and
the star player are leavin'. Let's go.

Hold it. Reba, it's over.

Look. I don't think what's
happening to cheyenne is fair either,

But there are gonna be
college scouts at this game.

This is his future
we're talkin' about,

And his future affects
our daughter's future.

Now come on. We
can still make kickoff.

You should go. I'll be fine.

No. I'm staying.

Aw, gee!

You know, I'm sorry, coach,

But these puka shells
aren't just fancy jewelry.

I'm married now.

And I don't wanna play for a
school that doesn't want my wife.

Oh, sweetie.

So we're not goin' to the game?

Nope. Maybe we should pray.

Or just me.

Don't look so down.

We should be proud for standing
up for what's right ahead of football.

That's something
to cheer about too.

[doorbell rings]
thank you, jesus!

- Hello. I'm mrs. Hodge.
- i know who you are. Come in.

Come in. She's right over here.

Shouldn't you be at the game?

I was booed at pregame warm-ups.

I've never been booed before.

That's surprising.

We've been fielding
offers all night long.

Turns out there are plenty of schools
who would love an all-state cornerback.

And they think a
pregnant girl who can

Throw a baton would
be a real crowd-pleaser.

Might I have a word
with van and cheyenne?

I'm told that we can't win
the game tonight without you.

Well, I don't like
to brag... Brag.

- We'll be slaughtered.
- You're 17.

It's your decision whether you go to
school or not. Now, is this your choice?

I wanna go to the
same school as my wife.

And if that means holly house
school for girls, then I'm there.

I see.

Cheyenne, it's come
to my attention...

That your suspension
may have been... Unfounded.

You're hereby
reinstated in school.

Here we go! Yeah! [Laughing]

Honey, mrs. Hodge just said you could
return to school. Now it's your turn.

Cheyenne, this is
where you say, "yes, mrs.

Hodge, I would love to
come back to school."

No. I don't wanna go to
westchester high anymore.

[Murmurs]

Nobody move.

Cheyenne, what's wrong?

Why would I wanna
go to a school...

When the only reason they want me
is 'cause I'm married to mr. Football?

If ernie glickman from
the chess team had

Gotten me pregnant,
I'd so be at holly house.

I know it's not the best option, but an
hour ago you didn't even have an option.

Mom, I'm a role model. The
freshmen girls look up to me.

Since when do high kicks
make you a role model?

Kyra.

I'm sorry, but in my book this is
the coolest thing you've ever done.

You think it's cool
that I got pregnant?

No, that's the dumbest
thing you've ever done.

Kyra. No, mom. It's okay.

I mean standing up for yourself.

You make good grades, go to all the school
functions, rah-rah for the sports teams.

Don't let them hide you away like
you're some pregnant freak show.

Hi. Anything I can help with?

There's a frisbee on the roof.

Cheyenne, your sister's right.
Everybody makes mistakes,

But it's how you handle them
that makes you a role model.

Oh, sure.

Hey, kids, don't be like me.

If you wanna go
back to that school,

You go in there with
your head held high.

And anyone who's uncomfortable
is just gonna have to get over it.

Mom, you can't even get over it.

What's that supposed to mean?

Face it. You're just as
uncomfortable with us as mrs. Hodge.

That's not true. I'm not allowed
to kiss my husband in my own house.

Since van and I got married, whenever we're
within three feet of each other, you wig.

I do not wig!

All right. I wig.

But raising married teenagers
wasn't exactly in my plan.

Well, we are married
teenagers. I know. I know.

Just give me some
more time. This is hard.

You're gonna be a
mom soon. You'll see.

It's not that easy on this side.

You're not that bad at
it. [Chuckles] well, thanks.

You two can help. No more wearin'
bride and groom t-shirts to school,

And no more braggin' about
sex at the breakfast table.

Why would I brag? We've only
done it like four times this week.

And no more sayin'
stuff like that.

Is everything going okay?

I think so. But it's your call.

Oh, let's go.

Mrs. Hodge?

- I'd like to come back
to school.
- All right!

Hey, sticking up for me was
very studly, mr. Montgomery.

You like that,
huh? Uh-huh. [Giggling]

Oh, go ahead.

Hey, y'all, the game
clock is ticking.

Let's go! Shall we kick
some willowbrook butt?

Praise the lord! Oh!

Who is she? My husband's
pregnant hygienist/girlfriend.

It's not as bad as
it sounds. Come on.

What?

What you said about me.

I feel like family.

Can I get a hug?
When I get my frisbee.