come and listen to the story about a man
named Jed to pour a mountaineer barely
kept his family head and then one day he
was sh**ting at some food and up to the
ground from a bubbling crude oil that is
black gold Texas Tea well the first
thing you know old Jeb's a millionaire
the Kim folks said Jed move away from
there said California is the place you
ought to be so the load and took the
truck in the mood to Beverly Hills that
is swimming pools movie stars The
Beverly Hillbillies
[Music]
thank you
shorty shorty
what you all good
you know you were supposed to Marielle
Verna here
yeah and why'd you let the judge marry
the Gloria
two reasons yet
she's one she's the other
I was too late the judge had already
left the building
don't worry I'll call his office we'll
get this marriage and all
right find time for the wedding she just
missed it oh there there bride you can
cry a bride should be happy she is
that's why I'm crying
she killings excuse me did you marry
Gloria yes Mom come on Chloe hold on
where do you think you're going to get
into my crowded in here for a honeymoon
you ain't going on no honeymoon you're
gonna have this wedding to know
okay Jed come on Louie where do you
think you're going now we're going one
of them nice and ultimate places like
how are you
ain't going no place with this woman
can't help myself jit he's handcuffed to
one another it's Hathaway unlocked those
stupid handcuffs
he's all yours Mrs Bradshaw all right
shorty kellums let's go home
you ain't gonna lock me in the cage
again are you I am and you're gonna stay
there until we become Mr and Mrs Alberta
Bradshaw
doing you a favor unlocking these
actually I should handcuff you to your
typewriter until the anonymous now back
to your desk Miss buckles the name is
Mrs kellums and what makes you think I
want an annulment
who cares what you want I'm your boss
and I'm Shorty's wife
and I think maybe I like it do you
realize I could fire you
go ahead I have a husband to support me
now
do you know what you need young lady you
need a good old-fashioned paddling and
you're going to get it right now you're
kidding oh no I'm not Mr Clampett give
her a good old-fashioned family
I'll be washing up and if he yells or
screams don't let her bother you this
washroom is soundproof
oh my Mr dry deal he gets the mat worked
up
so you think he'd like to stay married
to Shorty would you well let's face it
it's one way out of this detention home
for underprivileged secretaries well I
can't blame you for wanting to be
married a fine looking young woman like
you ought to have a husband well thank
you those are the first kind words I've
heard in this Bank
sit down
ever been back in the Hills no
ever been on a farm no I've been a city
girl all my life
well you know what Shorty's Place back
in the Hills is uh sort of out in the
country that sounds groovy I've always
wanted a Country Place well you might
just got into it wouldn't you like to
see what a farm is like before you pull
up steaks and move back there could I
yeah we got a lot of land around our
place we put you up a small farmhouse
and you can have a first-hand sample
you'd go to all that trouble just for me
ain't no trouble at all glad to do it
gee and you're so nice I don't know what
to say oh need to say nothing at all
just come along
and I don't go to crying
I can't help it you're the first man
besides shorty who's ever been kind to
me
well good cry I'll make you feel better
go on get it out of your system I'll be
waiting
and let that be a lesson to you
[Music]
yes sir I understand
I'll tell him right away
yes sir bye something wrong Ellie no
ma'am Paul wants us to commit putting up
the little old cabin out back the little
old cabin what fur Paul says he's
snatching home a girl to live in it
damn Shake he's gone and got himself
married
of course I seen it happen before
marriage is kitchen he was standing
there watching shorty Mario burner and
the fever struck him come on Diggity
doggone's gonna have me a mom
I wonder who we marry well it must be a
concert girl because he wants Jethro to
get him some chickens and Hogs and a cow
right away
honeymoon couples coming up the driveway
which one a shorty in Alberta oh here's
Ram rice everybody
[Music]
thank you
that's it what's the matter Alvin you
got married didn't just
he did I didn't
there's no such thing as being half
married you gotta be husband and wife
you can't be husband and friend don't be
too sure granny this year's Hollywood
I'll explain later granny right now I
gotta lock this little twerp up in his
cage come along you miserable little
weasel Yes dear come in dear
they sure talk like husband and wife
Miss Jane can you clear up this mystery
I better let Mrs Bradshaw do that I have
to hurry back to the bank
[Music]
I just some don't understand that
marriage at all like I said granny this
is Hollywood
oh here comes Paul with his bride is
Uncle Jed married that's right boy have
some real sudden good thing we got
plenty of rice left let's get ready to
pout them
[Music]
[Applause]
congratulations I really mean it you
sure got the best part of this deal
y'all are making a mistake what do you
mean you two got married didn't you
she did I did
another Hollywood
[Music]
how this is gonna discourage Miss Gloria
from wanting to live back in the hills
look granny you gotta remember she's a
city girl she ain't never been around
chickens and figs and goats and such
there you are she's gonna fall in love
with it and don't forget she's also
going to be digging in the dirt milking
the cow slapping the Hogs and washing
her clothes with homemade Lysol okay
he was painting a picture of paradise
was Paradise to you might not be in his
glory
hi Ellie hi Gloria well look who's here
hello welcome to a back in the woods
farmhouse Shorty's house like this oh no
with the two you can fix it up till it's
pretty near this night you're joking
it's like a lot of work but Farm women
get used to that
[Music]
oh look at the funny looking dog you're
a Miss Gloria that Critter is what you
call a hall
yeah that's where you get ham and bacon
and sausage really I get mine at the
supermarket
oh Jen we've got our work cut out first
yeah I think maybe first off uh Miss
Glory had best change into some work
clothes oh I wear this dress to work
what you want when you live on the farm
Ellie May take her and get her into some
back home work done yes come along Miss
Lori see you later
shorty Mr Drysdale and I have set the
wheels in motion for the annulment oh
that's good news
let me out we'll celebrate
I trust you
apply the way the time
horse breeding exactly after we're
married we're going to get rid of those
mothy mules on your farm and start
raising Thoroughbred racehorses
well
I'll enjoy that
but what I'd really enjoy some smoking
let me out so I can give you a big old
hug
oh we can do that through the bars well
come here baby
[Music]
fill me with ecstasy now how about
feeling me some of them delicious video
to yours I'll go stick something in the
oven
make it to your head
what was that oh I said it's great to be
thin
boy shorty the way you swapped that key
was really slick
it's my key hey Lisa you didn't know it
didn't have it
well put it here right it'll be out of
the reach of pickpocket
music
thanks a lot Jethro well you deserve to
be afraid that was real slick
hey hey what's that magazine huh
never mind you're too young to see this
one of those huh
oh come on shorty let me see it oh never
mind Jess roll I wouldn't dare let a
magazine like this out of the cage well
then I'll come in and see oh no it ain't
for the eyes of a boy like you well this
picture drive you crazy prettiest Philly
I ever seen
look at them beautiful labels coming in
oh yeah she built and not a stitch on it
oh she sure looks like a fast one
let me see let me see
I dropped it I'll get it
this is a picture of a wall
yep
come on you shorty did you outsmart me
again I don't care bro you outsmarted me
are you sure
you wound up the magazine didn't you
yeah that's right I did wrong everyone
[Music]
are you sure this is what a farm wife
wears it is back in the Hills yes ma'am
but why well first off it's nice and
warm you see one wife gets up at four
o'clock oh wonderful I love to sleep
late
[Music]
Jordy Alberta's cooked you up a
guest room all right
okay let's shorty out oh no sir he let
me in
appreciate it if you'd unlock the cage
I think maybe that's the best place for
you if you're in there you can't let
nobody out if you let me out I'll help
you find Shorty I don't think Shorty's
gonna stray far we've got the queen bee
in the cabin
now what boy
if you unlock the cake and step inside
I'll show you a racy magazine
will you see the picture
sweet prettiest Philly you've ever seen
and boy is she built not a stitch arm
I've never heard of a horse wearing
clothes
how did a big dumb over here Billy we
Bend It Like Him get the best of the
giant brain like I got sitting up young
hey Casa Bessie come here I want to talk
to you
now listen
up there on the limb of that tree is the
key
you get that key and unlock the cage let
me out I'll give you a banana
hey I got a banana here and you can have
it you just get the key
go get it get it that's it
come on put the key in the lock and turn
it
remember you're gonna get a banana big
old yellow Rascal just ride free
that's it that's it
it's a lock out and open the door good
good
and you're so smart take this
you sit up here and eat your banana
go on cousin Bessie
hey don't get up tight baby that's life
the smart takes away from the dumb
anyway you just a little old lady you
done run up against a monster human
brain
excuse me for laughing bestie but you
sure fell for that banana trick
[Music]
oh good you fished around the cot yep
quick as Miss Glory tries her hand at
Milton I'm gonna hit you up the donkey
and let her have a go with flower she's
a big strong girl Jed most likely do
fine here's Miss Glory let us convince
learning their chores
fine and dandy will take Milken first
what's this for well that's to catch the
milk now come on over to Old bossy the
cow and we'll get started okay
hi bossy nice cow
Miss Gloria this here is a donkey they
don't give milk oh what do they give
mostly trouble
this is a cow now Gloria you sat on this
door and you put your bucket under there
that's where the milk comes out
hey look at that four faucets
that's right you can get milk from all
of them
okay bossy I'll have a court of
h*m*
you're right granny we got our work cut
out first
gather me I'm busy
who let you out of the cage nobody I
smarted my way out with the sixth grade
educated brain
good good job smart Ellie's eight
I tricked him into thinking it was a
banana in the cage and when he come in
to get it I slipped out and locked him
inside
smartnet ape is a real step forward for
you thank you it made me awful hungry
though it takes a lot to feed a giant
brain like mine
afraid the only videos is uh whatever
and it's cooking in the kitchen
oh well well then I'll Scamper back to
the house I'm starving
what do you see what I fixed for your
big spare ribs and grits and and some
fresh fruit for
what happened
tell me shorty tricked you into opening
this cage
locked you inside and taken the key oh
you poor little deer it isn't your fault
here's a banana of course
where do I get my hands on that slippery
little eel
[Music]
there really was a banana in there hey
you give me that that's mine
well I'm not coming in there and get it
that's mine and I'm starving
[Music]
Look Who's laughing I got the banana
[Applause]
[Music]
ready your curtains is up oh fine Jed
well how's Miss Glory doing with a chore
oh she's strong and willing chip she
milked the cows she slaps the Hogs she
fed the goat she cleaned the chicken
pins and now she's out there plowing in
fertilizing
that girl has got Grit last time I seen
her she was covered with it
kid
Ney
where is my big beautiful dog you mean
alverna or Glory
I said beautiful Jed that narrows it
down to glory
to do farm chores oh ain't that
wonderful
what a wife she's gonna be I done found
me the perfect woman
she's hard working and she loves me
[Music]
that's your big beautiful doll
been learning chores huh yeah
good now you know what you can do with
the farm
I know what you can do with it
would you like to soak in the knife
would I well
here's the tub all you have to do is
heat the water and throw a cake of ice
open it isn't there a bathroom
oh sure right through that door Yonder
this leads outside
where it is
that does it shorty I'm sorry
I belong behind a desk not a plow
oh there you are shorty Mr Drysdale just
called and he said since the license is
made out to you and me your marriage to
Gloria is invalid Hallelujah
who is that
yes I got a Mormon in the oven let's go
oh bye Gloria
it was nice being married to you
[Music]
hey Jordy
I put myself in kid
why
you know Vernon was commissioned to look
good to me
see you later shorty
[Music]
boots black belt bad news for the bad
guys Walker Texas Ranger weeknights at
six on the Hallmark Channel you're here
about Maggie May I'm her daughter
daughter a family she never knew what if
this woman really is my sister a liar
she never imagined you've turned into a
real country girl a Hallmark Channel
original movie Melissa Gilbert Lindsay
Wagner bigger than water premieres
tonight at nine on the Hallmark Channel
welcome back now here
[Music]
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