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02x05 - Queen of DeNile

Episode transcripts for the TV show, "I Am Weasel". Aired: July 22, 1997 – 2000.*
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Series centers on I.M. Weasel, a smart, noble and successful weasel, I.R. Baboon, an unintelligent and rude Hamadryas baboon who is envious of Weasel and often acts as his frenemy, and the mischievous Red Guy, who often antagonizes the duo.

02x05 - Queen of DeNile

Post by bunniefuu »

I are demanding rematch, Weasel. Very

well, Baboon. One more game of

tic-tac-toe, one in a row. Winner goes

first. Hmm

Hey, what do you know?Tic-tac-toe one in

a row. Hoo-ha, I win again. What?!

I am losing again?! I am

hating losing all time!

I am Weasel, Asp Exterminator. May I help

you?It's a long

distance call for you.

Hello, Riddle Asp Exterminators. I am

Weasel speaking.

Asp! Asp!

Hello?Hello Dane. I've been disconnected.

Hey, I are. That was from Queen

Cleopatlis. The royal palace is full of

asps. Key or pantless?Can

is full or asp?Let's go!

Ohh

Won't somebody help

me?Egans, I had no idea the asp problem

was this big. Come

on now!

Please! I am not a piece of meat! I have

never seen so much asp before. Hello.

It's me, Cleopantless,

Queen of Denial.

It's the queen, I'll say. Can we get on

with this already?I've got a world to

rule. So, would you kindly hurry up and

get rid of all these snakey asses?

I am the hero. I will set free of

denying. Not so fast, Mr. Vapo.

Asps are dangerous. We must use caution

and stealth. Ohh

What our little house for?This, my simian

pal, is the latest in cruelty-free pest

control. The asp motel.

Asps check in, but they don't check out.

We lure them in with a tasty mint and

then... Wham-o, trapped like a Mexican

moose. All we have to do is

wait.

Yee-haw. Lookie

what I are seeing. Ooh, slapped you. Mmm,

mmm, minty chocolate slurp.

Ah

No, you a custom of girl asp.

You pretty-a*s snake, stupid weasel.

Just for record, I are not liking this

one b*tch. Yes, siree. There's nothing

quite like a nice, big, fresh, hot bucket

of asp milk. I are

humiliating! You make a great

asp, baboon. Now, we must make you smell

like one.

Oh, go away, you worms! Hey,

come on, k*ll me! Forever! Come on!

Yoo-hoo! All right!

Baby, baby! Wow!

Yeah! Yikes! Hey, come on,

What the?Tots rental?

This ain't no a*s. It's just a smelly old

baboon in a two-bin soup. What?I'm

on a journey,

Looks like the Aspen costume was a bad

idea. Oh, well. Hey, Asps,

it's the queen!

It's

looking like every aspen world are coming

to palace.

ohh The queen are a asp magnet.

That's it. She's an asp magnet.

I now know what to do.

Looky, giant asp trap all

finished. It's finished.

Well, that takes care of those pesky

asps. Ladies, hello. Pentless queen

trap here. Bunch of asps in here.

Baboon, where did you build the escape

hatch?Escape hatch?What's that?Oh,

well, we're only human.

Dr. Baboon, this is astounding.

According to the hieroglyphics, this

isn't a tomb after all. It's an asp

trap, and I have figured out the secret

to getting inside.

Oh, hello there. Have you met my

a*s?They're really quite nice once you

get to know them.

Say, Dr. Bambone, how's about another

game of digital tic-tac-toe one in a row?

Hey, you go first, you one last time.