02x05 - Three Ring Bind

[bunniefuu]

♪♪

Ah-hyuck.

H-h-h-hit it ♪

Like father, like son ♪

You're always number one ♪

Yes!

Best buddies, best pals ♪

Yeah ♪

You always seem

To work things out ♪

Can't you see

You're two of a kind ♪

Lookin' for

A real good time? ♪

Whaa-ooo-h*-h*!

A real good time ♪

Repor

To the goof troop ♪

And we'll always

Stick together ♪

Always

Stick together ♪

We're the goof troop ♪

The best of friends

Forever ♪

Side by side

Wherever we go ♪

We're always ready to roll ♪

Now gimme a beat ♪

We're the goof troop ♪

And we always

Stick together ♪

Gawrsh.

We're the goof troop ♪

The best of friends

Forever ♪

Now we're calling

Everyone ♪

Come along

And join the fun ♪

Report to

The goof troop ♪

La do be da bop

La ba do bop ♪

Yeah!

[ Dog barking ]

p*stol:

P.j.!

Duck!

P.j.!

Come out right now

Or I'm gonna tell daddy!

She's going into your house!

Maybe she's given up?

Maybe, but we'll stay

Out of sight for a while

To make sure.

Yum

Let's see, bad news,

More bad news,

Worse news what's the world

Coming to?

Daddy, daddy, daddy,

Daddy, max and p.j.

Won't play with me.

Oh, that's great, pumpkin.

They don't like the circus.

I love the circus.

I love the lionesses

And the monkey shines

And elephanticals

And the bears.

Don't you just love

The circus, daddy?

I just know you do.

Don't you daddy, huh?

Don't you, don't you,

Huh, huh, daddy?

Mmm, oh, sure, lady bug, sure.

Daddy loves the

Whatever it is you

Were just talking about.

Hurray!

Then you can play

With me 'cause you

Love the circus too.

You can be my

Pony act.

Yow!

But p*stol,

My little onion ring,

Daddy was trying

To read the paper.

Waaah!

You don't want to

Play with me either!

Oh, shh, shh!

Now, now.

p*stol, baby, daddy's

Little petunia.

Quiet down!

What are you doing

To that child?

Oh, we're jus

Playing circus.

Aren't we, p*stol?

Oh boy, giddyup, daddy.

C'mon, daddy!

[ Shouting ]

Oh, isn't that sweet?

Now keep it down!

Ride 'em, daddy,

Yahoo!

[ Crashing ]

Sounds like p*stol found

Someone to play circus with.

I don't know whether to call

A doctor or a vet.

[ Pete groaning ]

Come on, daddy, you have to

Play the rest of the animals.

Lions and teddy bears and

Wait a second,

Daddy's little peach pit.

I have a better idea.

How'd you like to go

See a real circus?

For you birthday.

Really? Oh, yes, daddy.

Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes.

Oh, but my birthday's no

For three months.

A mere technicality.

Now, daddy's too busy

To take you

Pete:

P.j.!

Ignore it?

Pete:

P.j.!

Bad idea.

Yes, sir?

Well, my boy, it though

Today you'd like to take

Your baby sister

To the circus.

Aw, but sir, I was

I think that's an inspired

Idea, mr. Pete.

But, we can't.

Waaah!

Oh, don't worry,

Punky-doodle.

The boys'll take you,

Or they'll collect their

Social security

Before they collec

Their allowance.

But that's just it, mr. P.

We're broke.

Yeah, busted, squeezed,

Emptied, dried,

Strangled, starved,

Nothing, nada, zippo.

Oh, don't worry, boys.

I'll spring for

Everything.

Oh, thank you, daddy.

Thank you, thank you,

Thank you, thank you

[ Chokes ]

I want to see the lions

And the elephanticals

And the tigresses.

Ugh, I think this

Big-tops bottom is showing.

And the monkeys

And the hippopotomohorses,

And the bears on the bicycles

And the little small yippy dogs,

And the clown's pockets,

And I guess that's all.

Place looks closed, p*stol.

I wanna see the animals!

Okay, okay, shh, shh, okay.

Hello?

Anybody in there?

What do you kids want?

Ah!

Tickets to the show.

We're closed.

Closed?

Hang on a sec.

Yes?

Uh, we'd like to know

When you're not closed.

You see, this little girl

Here really loves--

There is no not closed.

We are always to be closed

From this moment on.

Got it?

- Got it.

- Good!

Hey, hey you, ugly man

With the hairy nose!

And what do you want,

You nasty little

Bed bug of a girl?

I want to see

The animals.

Now, if you're not out of

Here in 10 seconds,

I'm going to sic gible

The clown on you.

Giblet the clown?

Big red noses and panel fee

Do not usually strike terror

Into my heart.

Your ten seconds are up.

But I'm open-minded.

You two better get going

While the get gone is good.

p*stol!

Where's p*stol!

I don't need a p*stol

To handle you two.

No, man, it's

My little sister.

Now, get off my foot,

And scram!

Oops!

Oh, these stupid shoes.

Uh, what abou

Her royal weirdness?

I think we better find her

Before chuckles here

Feeds her to the lions.

So where are all

The animals?

[ Monkey screeching ]

What?

Hi, monkey.

No wonder there's no circus,

They got you all locked up.

[ Screeching ]

Let you out?

That's a great idea!

Okay, guys, come on out.

[ Screeching ]

Kitty! I just love kitties!

[ Elephant blaring ]

And an elephantical.

[ p*stol gasps ]

And a teddy bear.

[ Seal barks ]

And a wet, shiny

Puppy thing.

With fish breath, blegh.

What are we waiting for?

Let's play circus!

p*stol's no

In here, max.

Shh.

No, no, no.

I won't sell you the animals

Unless you buy the res

Of the circus as well.

I want out of

This silly business.

Just look at the clothes

We have to wear.

It's demeaning, isn't it,

Giblet?

- Well

- Shut up, giblet!

She's not here.

Let's check the tent.

[ Lights clang on ]

And now for p*stol's

Circus of the animals.

Annie the peanut sh**ting

Elephantical!

[ Monkey screeching ]

And now for boris and

His real high roller skating.

[ Howls ]

Annie, don't be selfish.

Let go of boris'ses wire!

[ Howls ]

Oops!

p*stol, we gotta ge

Out of here.

Why? We're having fun!

That's why!

What do you malevolen

Little munchkins think

You are doing?

We're having a circus!

Who told you to

Set those animals free?

They told me to.

They don't like

That icky old cage.

Did you hear her, giblet?

The animals told her

To let them out,

Because the pewling

Little darlings don'

Like my icky cage.

Get those animals

Back into that cage

Right now!

[ Honks horn ]

Elephant, seal,

Monkey, lion.

Okay, where's the bear?

I want that bear here

And I want him here now.

I think that clown's wish

Is about to come true.

[ Whistling air ]

Ooh!

Help! Who turned ou

The lights?

Where's the exit?

Help!

Stand up like a man!

You're not gonna put my

Friends back in that old cage.

Oh, and what's to stop me,

You insignificant weed

Of a child?

Ow! Ooh! Eeh!

[ Groaning ]

I hate this!

Let me out!

Get those troublemakers

Into that cage.

Uh, I suppose it's

Too late to negotiate?

The only thing

To do is

Run!

[ Lion roars, elephant blares ]

You leave my friends alone,

You mean old

Meanie!

Not so fast, spunky.

Why don't you make

Yourself comfortable

And watch what happens

To your friends?

[ Cackles ]

Yow!

If I weren't a grown man,

And a gentleman to the core,

I'd tell your mommy

On you.

What the?

Ooh!

[ Blows raspberry ]

All right, tarzan,

You want to play?

Let's play.

Uh-oh.

[ Screams ]

Come back here,

King kong!

[ Snickers ]

Huh?

Ha!

Got you, banana-breath!

[ Giggles ]

Oopsie-daisy.

[ Roars ]

If you'll excuse me

For a moment,

I have to go find a

Larger net.

Come on, max, we got to

Go find my sister and split.

[ Elephant blares ]

[ Chuckles ]

Blow your nose

All you want, annie.

I got you!

[ Elephant blares ]

Come on, annie.

Let's get some peanuts!

[ Elephant blares ]

We clowns aren'

As dumb as we look.

No, you're even dumber.

Haul buns, petester!

[ p*stol laughing ]

Faster, faster!

So, so, if we pooled our

Allowances and worked

After school on weekends

For a couple of centuries

I don't want your money.

I just want the three of you

Out of my life.

You're just a mean old--

Heh, heh. Cute, huh?

Uh, she said she's

Sorry about your circus.

Well, I'm sorry, too,

But for the price I'm getting

For your friends,

I can retire in style.

At least as puppy chow,

They'll be good for something.

Puppy chow?

You think he means it?

I think this guy'd sell

His own mother if he could

Find a market for gorillas.

So you boys talk tha

Sawed-off little harpy and

Where did she--

Find her! Somebody

Find her before--

Here I am!

Goodbye, goodbye.

Good riddance.

Ah, yes, giblet.

Now that those

Children are gone,

Nothing can possible

Go wrong.

Ooh.

Nobody around?

Great.

Okay guys, it's snack time.

[ Excited animal noises ]

Oh boy!

Here's a nice birdy

For the kitty.

And a steak for boris.

And protein for

The puppy thing.

[ Barks ]

[ Dog barking ]

Uh-oh, trouble.

[ Shrieks ]

[ Whines ]

[ Muffled barking ]

Let's finish eating

In my room.

Hey, what's all the noise

You flea-bitten tire-biter?

What the?

[ Muffled barking ]

I'll m*rder that mutt!

You're supposed to be

A watch dog, not a chow hound.

That reminds me.

I'd better make sure

My little rug rats are

Bedded down.

Night, son.

Sleep tight.

If the bed bugs bite

Hit 'em with a hammer.

[ Laughs ]

Heh-heh.

Night, sir.

[ Crunch ]

Huh? What?

Peanut shells?

p*stol?

And so the icky old ringmaster

Ran away screaming

And was never seen again.

And the princess

And all the aminals

Lived happily every after.

[ Happy animal noises ]

Pistolkins, are you

Sleepypoo?

It's daddy!

Baby cakes?

Hi, daddy.

Nighty-night, monkey face.

Say, that kinda tickled.

Ha-ha! I think one of

Us needs a shave, daddy.

Hmm, yeah.

One of us.

[ Monkey chitters ]

Uh I had to

Blow my nose.

Oh.

Hmm.

I must be sleepier

Than I thought.

[ Muttering ]

Giblet:

Boss, even if she has

The animals,

How are we ever

Gonna find her?

We'll find her.

A child that obnoxious

Is impossible to

Keep secret for long.

p*stol:

Now, if you all

Stand very still,

This is the best time

To get a "yes, yes, yes!"

From daddy.

[ Doorbell rings ]

Daddy, daddy, daddy,

Num, num, num.

Daddy, daddy,

Daddy, daddy.

[ Pete muttering ]

Daddy, daddy, daddy!

[ Barks ]

That's a good dog.

Nice doggy.

They followed me home

From the circus.

Can I keep 'em, huh?

Can i, can i, can i?

Please, please, please, daddy,

Oh, please.

I'll take care of them,

I'll love them,

And I'll feed 'em.

Well, he didn't say no.

Pete:

Circus animals?!

p*stol, what where

Oh, daddy, I'm so glad

You didn't say no!

You'll love them, daddy.

They can do all

Sorts of things

Like clean the pool and keep

Away the burglars.

- Oh, but, p*stol honeybun.

- Very, very entertaining

And take care of me

When you and mommy go out.

You just can'

Have 'em.

- [ Motor approaching ]

- Why not?

Because they belong to me,

That's why not!

But he's gonna make them

In to puppy chow!

- Ew!

- Ew!

Oh, but they belong

To him, sweet cheeks.

He can do what he wants.

But, but, but, bu

They're my friends!

[ Crying ]

Get the truck started.

Goodbye, I'll never

Forget you.

Whoa!

Hey, stop, runaway truck!

No driver!

Hyuck, hi-ya, pete!

What's going on?

Follow that truck!

That's my baby,

I'll give the orders, see?

Follow that truck!

Oh, boy, just like the movies!

Whoa!

Faster, goof!

[ Tires squeal ]

[ Honking ]

She's a-heading for the river!

[ Screaming ]

[ Tires squealing ]

[ Splash ]

[ Goofy shouting ]

My baby!

Oh, no!

[ Pete sobs ]

My little sweet patooty.

Gone!

Huh?

p*stol?

Baby?

[ Sniffing ]

[ Barks ]

Yay!

[ Laughing ]

Let's do it again!

At least my puppy

Chow is safe!

You're not gonna turn

The animals

That saved my daughter

Into dog food, see!

They're my animals now!

So get in that mobile

Cage of yours,

And get that truck

Out of here!

But our truck

Is down there.

I know.

[ Shouting ]

Oh, daddy's little

Corn fritter.

Hey, what are you gonna do

With all these animals, mr. P?

[ Laughs ]

Woo! Wee!

Woopie!

[ Monkey screeches ]

[ Elephant blares ]

[ Seal barks ]

Boy, I got to hand I

To you, dad.

You really came through.

Yeah, I can't wait until

p*stol's next birthday.

Because of why?

Oh, 'cause p*stol wants to go

To see-more seaquarium.

[ Groans ]

Yeah.