04x06 - Road Trip

[bunniefuu]

[Music]

[Music]

Oh

[Music]

[Music]

[Music]

Wow looks like you had quite a workout

yeah three whole hours now that finally

got it together I can try riding it

I heard that keeps applying to Southern

Dominion yeah it's a tough school to get

into you know he has to write an essay

comparing and contrasting educational

theories from the Dark Ages to the

Eisenhower administration

either that or go on an interview so

when's the interview on Friday he's

gonna take Freddy with and then they'll

spend a couple days looking over the

campus well they should have a great

time I'm gonna drive him down

oh well dad went with me and all my

college interviews I know and you

complained about it for eight years

you've got all those interviews by

yourself it would have been a real

confidence builder for you

yeah but Kip really needs me I mean the

kid still watches cartoons on Saturday

morning

what are you it's all arranged I'll take

a couple days off I say he'll leave

lumpy in charge that should work out

real good how much trouble could love to

get into in a couple of days probably no

more than last time

when he left his maid in charge of the

office and she bought that algae farm in

New Jersey

[Music]

boy this is working out great a 20

minute interview and then the rest of

the weekend a party my pessimism tip but

I'm not exactly known as a social

gadabout especially so far away from

family and friends my own bathroom come

on it can't be afraid to try new things

you're practically a college man look

you go perhaps I'll get cracking on that

essay Freddie we need this trip I mean

we gotta stop playing everything so

close to the vest it's true it's a good

idea to broaden one's horizons but that

doesn't exactly solve my bathroom

difficult oh come on we used to top

being such a baby

I mean it's time to grow up be a man

Kemp I put your favorite pillow in the

car like yes what if I bring you back a

sweatshirt with southern dominion on it

huh like sweatshirts from cool school

but I will take a calendar of the hunks

on the swim team remember what I told

you I know don't pick up any hitchhikers

don't keep your car doors locked and you

obey all local speed limits and you

don't eat shrimp on Monday because

they're always leftover okay don't worry

I will

oh here's a little extra money just in

case don't tell your father

so you're off yeah sure you don't mind

me not going well of course I mind it

would have been great no problem I'll go

pack kidding I looked up take care of

yourself and here's a couple extra bucks

you know just in case but don't tell

your grandmother don't worry I won't hey

yeah what's the big to do went out on a

college interview sir College you're

graduating this year hey that's great

thank you

don't worry about this interview I was a

total tongue-tied dork on my first

college interview and who still got in

no there's no sense worrying about it

Thanks it's a cute bunch they have a

little extra fun on huh but don't let

your dad know think you're gonna be gone

the entire weekend I was wondering if

maybe I understand come on they're just

going for an interview I mean it's not

like they're gonna get in or anything

grandma don't worry I have everything I

could possibly need

[Music]

okay don't worry

I slipped them an extra 20 just in case

so did I me too I only got ten

[Music]

Roberts plates he don't rush me when

people rockin my palms sweat hold this

Freddie we don't have time for this

how's my hair look in the back now let's

go it's not my fault we're late

I mean you should never take direction

from someone with less than three teeth

oh please you would have been here on

time if you had made me stop at 19

different gas stations can I help it if

every public restrooms south of the

mason-dixon line looks like an

archeological dig right great we're 20

minutes late or a week and a half early

back on the 14th have a wonderful spring

vacation

and we would have been here on time if

you didn't have kidneys besides a woman

me

you're the one with fun and for few

Billie's without a dental plan you just

hear my dad now Kip your grandmother and

I are very disappointed in you I guess

you're just not ready to accept

responsibility boy as for me I guess

there's something to be said burying a

father really doesn't care I told you

it's nice taking the ride board anybody

going to Fort Lauderdale off honey has

second-degree sunburn all those

treatments to get rid of my appendectomy

scar now no one's gonna see me my new

bikini far louder they'll support a

thousand guys looking for a while time

and not finding us we're gonna miss all

those wild parties and dancing and cello

bass cello bass

[Music]

[Applause]

[Music]

[Music]

what do you think you think we'll be

able to get a couple of passengers to

Fort Lauderdale your father will k*ll

you can you think of a better way to die

it's great we're looking for a ride

coincidence yeah no I don't think I've

ever seen you guys before what do you

live live

you know the dorm across from the flawed

Darkman Hall that's where we live we're

a couple doors tonight did you talk to

my fellow door tonight here for a second

yeah I think you're suffering from an

enzyme imbalance and it's affecting your

judgment look right here we blew the

interview but we can still salvage an

adventure we have three days two girls

and a convertible got parents

he'll never know this doesn't sound like

the kid cleaver we've all grown to love

and be bored by what's gotten into you

look Freddie I refuse to let you be the

flat tire on our road to manhood think

about coeds surf Sun coeds

and you've always been fond of jell-o

[Music]

here it is the El Presidente suite the

last thing can see in town so you'll

have to share it oh darn

it's gonna be a little crowded well if

you don't want it I come from a family

of 12 I like to be crowded

well not the rich but as long as the

bathrooms clean how far is the nearest

service station hey this place is great

why is it empty the kid who was staying

here fell asleep on the beach last night

was run over by a Jeep I don't want the

dead man's bed I don't care where you

sleep as long as you obey the rules no

boozing no wild parties and the balcony

is not a diving board don't worry sir

see we're from a Bible study group and

the wildest thing we do is play spillin

spell with the Apostles names Matthew I

hate you kids will you handle that

really well oh thanks it was nothing so

what do you want to do first

unpack sounds great good well you can do

that and we're gonna go check out the

beach wait wait wait if what have we

gotten ourselves into

we're in a tawdry hotel room in Fort

Lauderdale with two refugees from beach

blanket bingo

yeah life's good isn't it but the road

ahead is fraught with danger we're gonna

have to live with the consequences of

our actions for the rest of our lives

let's go through their suitcases and

suicides their bras are

good god did you leave all sense of

decency at the state line Freddie don't

you remember in economics learning the

concept of risk and reward right and we

also learned about the law of supply and

demand we supplied them a ride and we're

no longer in demand give me a break

they'll be back

and they actually think we're college

guys oh yeah they were real impressed

when you told them you were in pretty

doctor school look if we want these

girls these women to like us you know

we're gonna have to start acting like

men

yeah well it's after three man you were

supposed to call your dad oh no probably

gonna tell us why don't you tell him

you're in a motel room in fort

lauderdale with two college girls you'll

never believe that I think I better open

a window getting a little messy in here

come on what's my new record hello Kara

how the interview go oh great

boys want to stay a couple of extra days

to monitor some classes Freddie wants to

see a cadaver what kind of father would

deprive him of that your father says

it's okay and we'll let Freddy's folks

know thanks for calling Kip love you bye

are you thinking what I'm thinking they

probably heard about some college

parties they want to go to how dumb do

they think we are

you lied to your grandmother the woman

that rub paper rub on your chest and now

Ellen rub cocoa butter on my back all in

all it's not a bad deal

[Music]

[Applause]

[Music]

okay okay so maybe last night do you go

exactly as I'd hoped

wasn't so bad sleeping in the bathtub

and that was personally thrilled with my

accommodations in the closet that I

shared with that foreign exchange

student Sahib and I became quite close

now I have a wonderful new recipe for

lamb right fine last night was a b*mb

but today's the first day the rest of

our vacation

[Music]

yeah this is a fun by the yard why we

say big rocks to our feet and go

swimming see where they're going

probably to let's bury the voice but

maybe upset

[Music]

[Applause]

[Music]

[Applause]

what's going on here in order to

cafeteria monitor you have to know the

heimlich manoeuver do you have to have

that thing blasting all the time

[Music]

reni wanted to see a cadaver it just may

get his wish

[Music]

the last when it sit for the pizza

contest things should quiet down now on

your underwear good evening sir

my what a handsome outfit you what's

always Norrington how come is always

suitcases well if the truth be told sir

I'm quite a clotheshorse all right sir I

can explain you see this is our church

choir and we were rehearsing in the

bathroom to give that echo effect rock

my soul in the bosom of Abraham

[Music]

[Music]

[Music]

by the way isn't that asbestos in the

ceiling okay this is terrible

no girls no hotel room and I think a

spider just bit me hi Freddie

what are you guys doing here I thought

you were judging the belching contest

but we thought you guys might need this

Thanks yeah after your luggage got

thrown in the pool we started feeling

kind of guilty yeah we've never felt

like that before yeah I guess what were

trying to say is we thought he'd used

you guys to get a ride down here that's

funny we thought we were using you but

for the record I was against it from the

start

[Music]

now where are we

[Music]

this is the best Spring Break ever I do

at a superb time you're a great kisser

especially for a high school boy how did

you know you said you lived in Dorfman

Hall and that's the girls dorm but if

you guys come here next year be sure to

look at that

[Music]

they said that we should look them up if

we get it great but I don't think it can

handle another interview

[Music]

you know gift even if every vacation for

the rest of my life it's been visiting

my aunt died attending to her sick cat

this one trip will make up for all of

them yeah and you were the one who

wanted to stay home with your own

bathroom but now I faced my every

adversity not triumph afraid no more of

the trip

[Music]

hey guys grandma ollie

[Music]

yeah how's it going son I'm almost done

sir

great here's a few more you know the

work you're doing inside of a craftsman

thank you sir

we don't have time for that speed it up

this punishment hurts me more than it

does you but believe me it's for your

own good I'm forever grateful

a simple college interview and it turns

into a weekend of debauchery sir I must

reiterate I tried to reach this Kip's

madcap scheme from the start right a

Haskell being led astray by a cleaver

don't compound this by lying what

concerns me most is how am I gonna tell

your mother about the shameless escapade

does she really need to be burdened with

this sir how do you expect me to keep

this from the woman who gave you life

nice try do you really think that an

episode like this could be forgiven for

a lousy $20 on the other hand hatreds is

bliss

[Music]

tonight at 7:05 Eastern don't miss the

body-slamming event of World

Championship Wrestling Mennonite o-5

George Segal Ben Gazzara and Robert

Vaughn the Allies are about to take

Germany and only one thing stands in

their way

bridge at Remagen now top athletes

compete on US Olympic gold a TBS Sports

exclusive next

[Music]

you