04x26 - My Dog, the Cat/World Without Me

[bunniefuu]

-[Garfield snores]

-[alarm clock]

[theme song]
Hello. I'm Garfield.

You've probably figured that out

from the opening titles.

But I degress.

Today's episode

is about complaining.

[complaints]

We have a lot of complainers

out there at the moment.


[complainer in audience] And I really

hate it when he talks to camera like that!

Now, I used to be a complainer.

[complainer in audience] Oh, and also,

I've already seen this episode!


Perhaps you remember how I used

to be back in, around season two.


I complained

about every little thing.


I wanted a hamburger

with everything on it.

By that, I meant:

lettuce, tomato, onion,

a hot dog, a roast turkey,


a sausage lasagna,

an order of shrimp chow mein,


a prime rib,

strawberry shortcake...

This cereal is soggy.
I'd want it to more crunchy.
We're all out of tartar sauce.

Yep,

I was a complainer all right,


until one day when Squeak

said something to me.


You sure complain a lot,

Garfield.

Those aren't complaints Squeak.

I just notice a lot of things

that aren't up to my standards.


Yeah.

That's what Renfrew says, too.


"Renfrew?" I'm starting

to sound like Renfrew?

Now, some of you may not know--

[complainer in audience]

We don't know who Renfrew is!


I thought you said you'd

already seen this episode!

This is Renfrew.

He's a most unusual breed.

He's a caninus complainus.


[Garfield]
Renfrew had two main activities

in his life.


One was avoiding

Al the Dogcatcher.


There he is!

There's that dog again!


He won't get away

from me this time!

I've got you, you mangy mutt!

Uh, sorry about the net

and the "mangy mutt" thing...

No! I said I was sorry! Help!

[Garfield]
And the other thing Renfrew

did all day was to complain.


Renfrew complained

about everything.


The park is way

too crowded today.


What are all these people

doing here?


What a stupid color to paint

a fire hydrant.

Hello, Mr. Doggie.

My mother and I

were having dinner

at a big, fancy restaurant

and there was this bone

left over and I thought:

"I'll bet that nice doggie I see

around the neighborhood

would like it."


So I brought it home

and here it is.

I hope you enjoy it, Mr. Doggie.
You call that a bone?

I always thought Renfrew's

motto was:


"If you can't say

something negative,

don't say anything at all."

[Garfield]

Mostly, Renfrew complained


about how he believed cats

had it so much better than dogs.


All you cats have to do is lie

around the house all day.

I don't have house.
You cats have it so easy.
Humans just give you food.
Humans never give me food.

All cats have to do is lie

around all day and be petted.

Nobody ever pets me.

His complaining got to all

the cats in the neighborhood

so what did they do?
They complained... to me.
[brouhaha]

[Garfield]

All right, all right.


Stop complaining to me about

Renfrew complaining to you.

I'm sick of it!

And I think I have an idea

what we can do about it.

There's an old saying:

"Be careful what you wish for,

you just might get it."


I decided it was time for Renfrew

to get his wish.


Now, you guys understand

what you need to do, right?

Clear as thinly-sliced cheese!
Good.

Here they are with him now.

Be ready when I need you


All rehearsed, Odie?

Let's hear it.

Not bad.

Explain to me why you

brought me to Garfield's house,


which, by the way,

could use a coat of paint

'Cause you're always saying

how much better

cats have it than dogs.


And Garfield's got a training

program so you could join us.

Yeah. Become a cat!
"Become a cat" ?
Ready to be catified, Renfrew?
Hold on here.
Remember how you were saying

cats get to just lie

around the house all day?

Yeah and how humans feed us?
And pet us?
You can't do it.

You can't train a dog

to be a cat.

Oh, I can't, can't I?
Odiecat! Odiecat!
[meow]

Oh I sure hope no mice

come along.

[meow]
Oh no! It is a cat!
Garfield,
you think I could become a cat?
Sure!
Of course, there is a risk here.
You might not turn out like me.

There's always the danger you

might turn into one of these...

Let's start the lessons.

The first thing

I had to teach him

was how to sound like a cat.

All right, Renfrew.

You have your script there.

Read what's on it.
Meow!
Ok keep going. Keep doing it.
Meow!
Meow!
Better. Now, one more time.
[dog bark]

Oops, sorry. I'm not used to

learning a foreign language.


I taught him how to annoy

the mailman.

[loud cat screech]
Not bad. I'll give you a B+.

I tried to teach him how

to catch or at least chase mice.


Oh, help!

The big, bad cat is after me.


I will catch you and eat you,

mouse! Miam miam.

Do I really have to eat him?
I wouldn't.

And then came the most

important lesson of them all...

All right now, Renfrew.

As a cat,

this will be your main activity


so take your time

and do this right.

On the count of three.
One.
Two.
Three!
[snoring]
Oh, you're good at this.
If I could make one suggestion,
a truly professional cat

picks a spot to sleep

in where he'll be in the way


when humans want to walk.

Like this.


Garfield!

I just got a bill from Vito's.

Did you charge seven thousand--
But apart from that,

I think you're ready

to graduate!


and by the power vested in me

by no one,


I now pronounce you

Renfrew the Cat.

Congratulations.
[cheering]
Thanks to all my fellow cats.

Well, I think

I'll go claw some drapes.


-Goodbye!

-Good luck!

Nice going, Garf!

You actually made him think

he's now a cat!

He totally fell for it!
For now.

But at least

we won't have to listen


to his complaints

about cats for a while.

That's what I thought.

As it turned out, within five minutes,

Renfrew realized something...

I'm...
I'm still a dog!
That sneaky cat!

I'm going to go tell him

what I think about it!


It was Renfrew's

worst nightmare.


Now, he really had something

to complain about.


I did it! After months

and months of chasing him,

I finally caught this dog!
I did it!

And I did it when my boss

was here to see it.


Look, Chief! I caught that dog

I've been chasing for so long!

I can't tell.
What kind of dog is he?
[meow]
Al, this is a cat.
No, he's a dog.
He goes "meow." He's a cat.

You're a dogcatcher. You're not

supposed to catch cats.

Let him go.
You imbecile!
Can't tell a cat from a dog!
I should fire you right now!

[Garfield]

And that was when Renfrew


decided that cats

were all right,


even if he wasn't one.


So that's how Renfrew gave up

complaining all the time.


He still complains

from time to time. We all do.


There are some things in life

worth complaining about


[complainer in audience]

Hey, Garfield!

That guy, for instance.

I didn't like that Nermal didn't

have any lines in this cartoon.

That makes two of us.

-Hi, Sandy!

-Hi, Nermal!


My agent. I could have played

a much bigger part.


Well, you're kind of limited

in what you can--


"Limited"? Garfield,

you've known me for years!


Since before

we were both in C.G.I.!


You know what I can do.

Name a role. Anything

Well...

You know how Odie

played a cat earlier?

Could you play a dog?
A dog? A cinch. Watch this.
[barking]
[barking]

Now, tell me

that wasn't convincing.

I did it! I caught a dog!

I know it's a dog

because it barks like one!

No! I'm not a dog! I'm a cat!

In fact, I'm the cutest cat

in the world!


Let me out! Sandy, do something!

I can prove I'm a cat!


So now, does anyone else

have any complaints?

No, I didn't think so.

[Paddy]
It all started,

as some good things do,


on a bleak and rainy day.


In the Arbuckle house,

a man named Jon


was concerned about his cat.

I don't know what it is, Liz.

He's just been moping around,

looking kind of glum.


I don't think he's sick

or anything.


What did you mean when you said

he has no enthusiasm?

Watch. I'll show you.
Garfield?

I'm baking a ton

of sausage lasagna.

Aren't you excited?

You're right.

Something's very, very wrong.

And I have no idea what it is.

Even if I could talk

and tell you, Jon,


you wouldn't understand

because I don't understand.

It's like I don't even matter.

All I do is eat and sleep

and eat and sleep...


I also throw the stick

so Odie can fetch it

How meaningful.

[Paddy]
And a little while later,

the rain had stopped


as the rain always does.


Garfield had been cooped up

inside for days


so he decided to go out

for a little walk.


But he headed for the end


of maybe the most spectacular

rainbow anyone had ever seen.


And what do you suppose was

at the end of that rainbow?

Why, me of course!

Top o' the cartoon to you,

folks!


The name's O'Furniture

but you can call me Paddy.

[scream]

Greetings, Garfield.

Remember me?


The great maker of magic

back in Season Two?

If you're so good at magic,

how come you haven't gotten

yourself on the show since then?


You haven't needed me

since then.


[Paddy]

And need me he did.


Garfield told me

how he'd been feeling lately,


like his life was boring

and didn't matter.


It's like it wouldn't have made

a bit of difference

if I'd never been born.

It would have made

a big difference!

Oh yeah?

Tell me one thing

that would have been different

if I'd never existed.
I'll do better than that.
I'll show you.
Where are we going?

To a world

where you never existed!

We're here.
No, we're there.
There is not here.

We're in a world exactly

like the one you lived in,

except you've never lived in it.

There's the mailman.

I'll scare him.


That always

makes me feel better.


He can't see us.

He can't hear us.


Remember,

in this world you never existed.

Outch.
Oh, thank you, Mr. Post.
Here you go, Mrs. Goodrich.

Who's that woman

living in our house?


It's not your house

in this world.

Is that other letter for me?
Nope. It's for Mr. Arbuckle.

He's the fellow who owned

this house before you.


He lives over in a mansion

on the west side now.

"Mansion"?
Come on. I'll show you.

A lot of things are different

because you aren't around.

Apparently.
Wow!

How is Jon able to afford

a place like this?


Mainly it's the money

he's saving

by not having to feed a cat
Outch.

You want someone to throw the

stick so you can fetch it, boy?

Oh, Daws!
Stick-throwing duty again, sir?

-Please.

-Very well.


Here, Odie.

I shall throw the stick

and you can fetch it--
again
and again and again
and again...
They don't seem to need me.
Hey Arlene!
She always seemed to need me!
Let's go see.

Oh, Bruno, you always

make me feel so beautiful.


Let's go to the park

and we can sit under the trees.

Arlene and Bruno?
Boy, I really don't matter.
No, Garfield.

I brought you here

to make you realize

you matter for many reasons,
and one in particular.
Well, I haven't seen--
Hey, what's going on?

[breaking news]
A state of emergency

has been declared


for the entire world.


It was announced moments ago

by President Jim Davis.

President Jim Davis?
Jim is president in this world?

Well, he doesn't have

your comic strip to draw.


Wow. I hope he doesn't mind

the loss of prestige.


[breaking news]
Scientists

report the impending invasion


by warriors

from the planet Parma,


a world where people

all resemble Earth lasagnas.


This telescopic footage

shot just moments ago


shows the invasion forces

who intend to enslave us all.


They will be landing

any minute now


and President Davis

urges all to remain calm.

In these horrifying times,

it is important that everyone

remains calm and cool,

even though we're all doomed!
Doomed, I tell you!
Doomed!

-[screams]

-[panicked running]

People of Earth!

Bow down before

your new masters.

You will work for us.
You will obey us.

And you will not eat anything

that looks like is.


Isn't there anyone

who can stop them?


There is no one in this world

who can stop them.

Hold the phone! I can stop them.
You can't, Garfield.
You were never born, remember?
But you can fix that!
Make me real!

Quick! Before my favorite food

conquers my favorite planet.

Make me really exist here.
Well, I shouldn't,

but I guess

this is an emergency.


There seems to be no one

in this world

who dares stand against us.
I dare stand against you!
A cat?

One alone cat

thinks he can defeat

the awesome forces of Parma?
Private Provolone!

Scan the memory cells

of this impudent one


and show me

what he is capable of!

Yes, General Gorgonzola.

This will show us

what he has done


so we may see

he is no threat to us.


I want to get a copy of this

on Blu-Ray.


General! We cannot defeat

such a monster!

What we going to do?
I will tell you what we do!
We retreat!

Maybe I can make a difference

in this world after all.


Why did you drag me away

from my adoring public?


Because you don't belong

in this reality.


You said you'd show me

a special reason why I mattered.


Was that it?

Me saving the world?


No, that wasn't it,

but we'll get to it.


Did you enjoy having my butler

throw the stick

so you could fetch it?
I know how you feel.

It's not the same as having

a playmate in the family?

I've been thinking.

Maybe we should have

someone else here.

Maybe, a cat!
But it couldn't be just any cat.

To fit in with us, it would have

to a very special cat.

Smart, funny.

I don't think there's a cat like

that in the entire world.

Yes there is! Me! Me, me!

Is that the thing you wanted to

show me that proves I'm needed?

No. Come with me.

I thought you and Bruno

were sweet on each other.


We were.

But he's just not right for me.


The guy I want

has to be one of a kind,

with a great sense of humor.

Someone orange

with black stripes.

Someone I could do things for

like maybe make lasagna

if he liked it.

Whoo! Me!

I like lasagna!

I'm all those things!


Is that the thing you wanted to

show me that proves I'm needed?


Vito's Pizzeria

is out of business?

How did this happen?

[Italian accent]

Do not be sad, Vito.

You are a great cook.

It is not your fault

business was so poor.


If only I'd had

one more regular customer!


One who ate

fifty pizzas a week.


Without me,

Vito would have to close down.


So that's the thing

you wanted to show me that

proves I'm needed?
No. Come with me.
Garfield,

you know all those people

out there watching this show?

If you didn't exist,

you know what they'd be

looking at right now?

No, what?
This!
They're still watching.
Because you matter!
To them, anyway.
Wow!
I guess I do.

I think it's time you went home

to the place where you belong.

Bye now.
Hi, Garfield.

I'll be ready on time

for our date tonight.


Date tonight?

Oh yeah sure, Arlene. Sure.

What? Oh, sure, boy.
I matter.
You do, too!

And I hope you don't have

to go through

what I went through to know it