11x05 - Something In The Air

[bunniefuu]

[dramatic music]

♪ ♪

Ah. [bleep] Ow.

Having my hand burned,
I can't sh**t my bow,

which means that I really
need to rely on fish.

Look at that guy. He's huge.

[chuckling] Oh, my gosh.

[laughing] Oh, there's two.

I am attempting to make
the warmest shelter

this show's seen.

Everyone knows Rock House.

I think I can outdo it.

Wow.

The more I get into my
body, the longer I last.

This will be half
the pike in this pot.

♪

[sighs] Oh, my
berry breakfast.

Ah.

First puke of
"Alone." [laughs]

[groans]

I haven't used the
bathroom in ten days.

This is something serious.

[groaning] Oh, God.

This is one of
the hardest things

I've ever done in my life.

I'm officially tapping out.

[dramatic music]

♪ ♪

[whispering] God, please
help me k*ll this moose.

♪

[tense music]

♪ ♪

I'm not tapping out.

I'd rather die.

♪ ♪

[exhales] Here goes nothing.

Whoa!

Yes!

Holy [bleep].

♪ ♪

This is the harshest
location possible.

We're 125 miles in
the Arctic Circle.

[shouts]

I never had an environment
make me feel like

a complete amateur before.

Everything is
against us out here.

Mother Nature went
and b*tch slapped me.

Looks like I got grizzlies
and wolves as my neighbors.

Holy crap.

They're just hunting
the shoreline.

Mother Nature is about
to dim the lights on us.

We're heading into
total darkness.

- [twigs snap]
- Hey, bear.

The cold and the dark is
going to sap people's souls.

It really makes you
wonder if it's worth it.

♪ ♪

There is no camera crew.

There's no support system.

I'm completely alone.

Yes!

People go in one way...

Stop bleeding.

And they come out
entirely different.

[shouts]

This is the most difficult

survival challenge in the world.

[grunting]

$500,000. That's completely
life-changing money.

It's beautiful.

Whoever can thrive
the longest...

If they out here, they
ought to be afraid of me.

Whoever can push through it...

- [groans]
- Wins.

I hope I made the right
choice coming out here.

♪ ♪

[suspenseful music]

♪

[imitating moose calls]

♪ ♪

[whispering] God, please
help me k*ll this moose.

♪ ♪

It's about 60 yards
away right now.

[chuckling softly]

I can't believe it.

Now I can sing and shout and
chop trees all I want to.

I don't care what
the noise does.

I don't care how
much noise I make.

The biggest game here is down.

It's clear to me
that God is with me.

[panting]

[grunts]

Oh, my goodness.

It's a beast.

This thing's bigger
than one of my horses.

There's no way I can flip
this animal over, though.

I'm gonna have to skin
it off the best I can.

[suspenseful music]

I have to get the guts
out so that they won't

make the meat spoil quicker
in this warmer weather.

The leg is where it's
gonna be really hard

to skin it this way.

I've never butchered a moose,

but I've butchered
plenty of large animals

that I know how much
work this is gonna be.

Stomach lining fat.

This is an
all-consuming project.

It could take all day and all
night and all the next day.

This is, like, a 60-pound liver.

And I know that I have to just
buckle in for this process.

[grunts]

♪

Found the arrow.

♪ ♪

All right.

Now I've got to make sure

that I don't lose any of it.

As I'm cutting on
this fresh meat,

the wind of this is
carrying far and wide.

And grizzlies are
gonna smell this.

I don't want to come and
find a giant grizzly.

I'm gonna clear this little
area and make a fire here.

♪ ♪

And I'm gonna keep that
fire going all night

to mix with the scent signature

so if grizzlies smell it,

they know that this is
a moose owned by man.

And I'll also be cooking
meat on that fire

while I work all night,

'cause I'm gonna burn up a
lot of energy doing this.

♪

Think I'll cut the legs off
and take the top quarters off.

This nagging feeling
is growing in me...

[grunts]

That the weather is
not gonna cooperate.

That means I'm gonna have
to work like a maniac

to preserve this meat.

Mmm. Yeah, that's
tasting good.

I have to transport the meat.

I have to get it
into a place where

I can watch over it and not
let the birds land on it

and bears get it.

♪

But I look at the
sun and I know that

I won't get it done before dark.

Man, I hope this
weather drops cold.

♪ ♪

Well, I've got the top half
of the moose butchered.

I'll butcher the
lower half tomorrow.

♪ ♪

Round trip is a mile

back to where I can
drop it near my camp.

And then I start to calculate

how many trips is it gonna take?

I mean, I'm already
tired from the day,

from k*lling the moose,

from butchering just
over half of the moose.

It's a big job.

Big job.

I'm a target for every bear

and everything else
in this whole region,

so I've got to be
smart about this.

[grunts]

Yeah, I can carry it home.

I can carry it home.

♪

I've covered the carcass up
with the skin for the night.

There's a good chill on tonight,

and I'm debating right now

which is more dangerous
in grizzly country...

to go work through
the night on it,

or to...

go tackle the other half
of it in the morning

in the daylight when I can see.

There's like 5,000 grizzly
bears in this territory.

So I've got to build a cache
that they can't get into.

So I've got a lot of work
over the next couple of days.

Either way, a lot of work.

♪

Well, one thing I've noticed

since it's been mild weather out

and I've got these, like,
thick winter boots on

is, my feet are
starting to suffer.

So I'm taking a piece
of black carbon,

and I dust that up onto my toes,

and that keeps
them nice and dry.

I'm just grinding it up
into a powdery texture

and then rubbing
that into my feet.

So this is like a
medicated foot powder.

OK, so I have to check my traps.

[soft suspenseful music]

I'm feeling confident
in my trail.

Animals will follow the trail.

And then that makes a
successful trap line.

Making a trail is like
utilizing animal psychology.

They will follow the
path of least resistance.

♪ ♪

So far, I've set
just rabbit snares

'cause I've just
seen so much sign.

But I haven't
caught anything yet.

Some fresh grass.

My plan is to expand,

to set some squirrel
poles as well.

I really want to make sure that

I'm just focused on getting
animals all the time.

[sniffles]

♪

[bleep].

♪

Oh, [bleep].

It's so hard.

OK, now I'm gonna go
look for the arrows.

Being out here, it's
a lot of tough work,

and I'm feeling anxiety
about everything.

I need to hunt more.

I need more fish,

and I don't really have
a way to release it.

It's a hard space
to be sometimes.

So out here, I'm
trying to stick with

that feeling of
hope that I can win.

♪

[gasps] I found it, I
found it, I found it.

Yes. Ah.

[sighs]

I have all my arrows now,
so I feel much better.

Don't lose arrows.

Determination.

Success.

[dramatic music]

♪

Gotta finish butchering

and transporting all the meat.

♪

Hustling to get all my
meat out of the sun.

[sighs]

♪ ♪

Still got a big pile
of meat to haul,

so I'll be busy
for quite a while.

[grunts]

I'm just thankful that no
bears have eaten it yet.

[vultures screeching]

I slept a bit last night,
and I'm now finished

butchering and
carrying the meat.

And my project today
is all building

the food cache cold storage.

[suspenseful music]

Trying to save all the
meat from the hot weather

got me so ragged.

And I was just
worried all night long

that a bear will find it.

♪ ♪

If I can get through
these next few days,

I'll be all right.

♪ ♪

I'm gonna get to work.

♪ ♪

Preserving and keeping this
meat is my biggest concern.

More than bears,
birds, anything else,

the enemy is weather.

It's still really cool back
here on this north bank.

And I'll work on building
something in the bank.

I got to keep this meat so
that I can smoke it all.

Everything comes down to this.

I have to do my best
to save the meat.

I'm definitely burning
a ton of energy

on this project and the
whole moose project.

But food security is worth it.

♪

To preserve this meat,

it's not just saving it
from the warm weather.

I have to save it
from moist weather.

And if the weather is
anything in this area,

it's very moist and humid.

[saw grinding]

♪ ♪

Now that I've gotten this moose

and I have the meat,

tapping out, that's
not an option.

The pressure to
win now is intense,

so I better pull it off.

♪

I'm gonna make a solid wall.

♪ ♪

I need a bunch more of those.

♪ ♪

Food cache is coming along.

I'm praying for
colder weather, quick.

Such a huge blessing
can also be a curse

if the timing isn't right.

[thunder rumbles]

But everything
for me this season

could come down to this.

There's no option on Earth
of wasting this meat.

♪ ♪

Hopefully this will
be grizzly-proof.

Now, I'm gonna put
stakes out here

and then fix it all together.

It'll be a 7- or


♪ ♪

I'm not quite finished

with the outside to
make it bear-proof.

Almost.

But I'm gonna go ahead
and put the meat in.

I'm gonna line the
inside with these bows,

put a grate of sticks down,

'cause I want some
airflow to it.

I don't want to seal it off
'cause then it will go bad.

♪ ♪

This is life here
for the winter.

I've got to protect it.

[wind howling]

All right, guys.

Fort Moose Meat is done.

It's staked down well back here.

And the bear is
gonna tear at it here

and he'll be able to put
no leverage back there,

and he won't think to go
back there and undo that.

So the locking log lifts off...

[grunts] Like this,

And I get the lid off...

and get the meat.

I think it should be
enough, but we'll see.

[sighs]

What a nightmare it's been.

[suspenseful music]

♪ ♪

[panting]

Four days ago, I
sat down on a rock,

and there was this really
sharp protrusion from the rock.

When I sat down on it,

that thing hit me
right on the tailbone

and snapped my tailbone.

♪ ♪

[chuckles] So I've been...

I've been gimping
around out here.

[chuckles]

I'm not worried about
it. It'll get better.

It's just one more
thing, you know?

♪ ♪

But anyway,

let's go check the net.

♪ ♪

The first few days it
slowed me down a bit,

but not anymore.

I'm doing fine.

But I need to get a real big
win for me at some point.

Oh, I see something.

I see a fish for... I
see two fish for me.

[laughs]

♪ ♪

That's the spot.

I guess that was the whole deal,

'cause I played around
all over this bank.

[laughs] That's just awesome.

♪ ♪

[sighs] Oh, man.

That one's just barely
hanging on there.

♪ ♪

Better be careful.

Oh, my gosh. Look
at how fat he is.

Oh, my gosh. He's huge.

Huge.

Oh, and he's got... [laughs]

He's got a lingcod in
his mouth or something.

[soft upbeat music]

Oh, my gosh. Look at this.

♪

I scored big time on these.

[laughs] This is just amazing.

All right, let's see what's
in your mouth, buddy.

That looks like a burbot.

I think the burbot
was caught in the net,

and the pike came
after the burbot.

[laughs]

All right, man. You're dead.

You might as well let go.

♪ ♪

[laughs]

Can I dump him out?

♪

[sighs]

♪

Look at this.

[laughs]

[laughing]

Oh, my gosh. What a score.

[laughs]

♪ ♪

What a freaking score, man.

♪ ♪

All right.

♪

It's been kind of a
rough start for me.

But when I lost my fishing line,

rather than breaking
all over the country

trying to k*ll squirrels
and burning more calories

than what a squirrel
would provide...

[chuckles]

I chose to teach myself
how to make a gillnet.

This is a turning point for me.

Everything is going
to be different now.

That's two huge pike

and some of my favorite fish
in the world, which is cod.

If I had some potatoes, I'd be
having fish and chips tonight.

I'm feeling pretty
good about this.

I finally found some
methods that are working.

That is incredible.

[dramatic music]

♪ ♪

Good enough for the chimney.

All right, we're back
on the shelter train...

'cause last night was cold.

So cold.

It was by far the
coldest night we've had.

And it kind of got me spooked.

I want to make sure this
is good as I can get it

and the insulation is all in.

I came out here knowing

I wanted to get a solid shelter

and begin preparing for winter.

OK. We got a layer
of horsetail.

Crossed it.

Staging myself for a long-term
situation is a priority.

It's just mud and
grass mixed together.

Yeah, big game, if you get it,

then you got a real
good shot at winning.

But I'll tell you what, it's
a full-time job to process it,

to smoke it, to keep it
all safe from animals.

I mean, I want that
steak really badly,

but it's almost irresponsible

to take an animal in
this kind of weather.

Whereas if I wait
for it to get cold,

I can slowly make the cache,
and when I get an animal,

I can just pop it up
there, and I'll be ready.

Willow branches

working beautifully.

I've put spruce bows
across the whole top

of the shelter for insulation.

On top of that, I have
about 5 inches of horsetail.

[suspenseful music]

My new shelter may be
small, but it's strong,

and it's gonna be warmer inside.

♪ ♪

Let's tuck this down.

♪ ♪

The only thing that can make you

a stronger outdoors man

and survivalist is to
be able to push through

tough situations
and learn from them.

♪ ♪

We got this damn
thing insulated.

Beautiful mud daub fireplace.

♪ ♪

We just need a front door
and some final touches.

But if winter came
tomorrow, we would be fine.

This shelter

is fortified

for the Arctic winter.

Man, I think we got
this situation handled.

[tense music]

♪ ♪

All right, this one goes out

to my nieces and nephews,

who were curious.

They'd say Chow Chow,
which is what they call me.

They call me Uncle Chow Chow.

They're curious how I'm gonna
brush my teeth out here.

So this is how.

[soft upbeat music]

You can either just go at it

with just your spit, some water,

or you can, uh...

you can just use a
simple piece of charcoal.

♪ ♪

Throw it in there.

♪

Oh, yeah.

♪ ♪

Not too shabby.

All right.

[suspenseful music]

Let's work on a fireplace.

♪ ♪

I think we're in for a winner
like this show's never seen.

And so I'm gonna keep
working on my shelter

as my main priority
to keep myself warm,

to keep myself dry, and
to keep myself safe.

Oh, man. [sniffles]

I'm gonna call this the bunker.

This is gonna have
so many layers,

and it's gonna have
the best fireplace.

I've just got to
be able to do it

without k*lling myself

and burning too much calories,

but I think I can knock it out.

So I'm gonna throw some of
these stakes in the ground.

And as I build these rocks up,

I'll have dirt behind them to
fill in and keep all the sparks

and make it a little more solid.

[suspenseful music]

♪

So now, rocks.

♪

I'm no stonemason, obviously.

♪ ♪

After college, I did
a lot of great jobs,

a lot of different jobs.

I joined the West Virginia
Air National Guard.

And that's one of the best
decisions I ever made,

getting to serve my country.

[soft upbeat music]

One leg up I might have
on some of my competitors

is my military experience.

That made me really good
at one thing in particular,

and military members
would know this.

I know how to just
shut up and color.

A lot of hurry up and wait,

but sometimes you just
got to get something done.

And we call that
shut up and color.

That's what I'm doing.

♪

That one go about right there.

It's perfect.

So today, I got
quite a bit done.

I didn't eat today. Um...

just didn't really feel like it.

I'll be fine.

I'm just gonna go to bed.

[suspenseful music]

♪

[wolves howling in distance]

[wolves howling in distance]

[wolves howling in distance]

And to me, it sounded
like they're really close,

but yeah, I don't...

I don't really know
how to tell out here,

as far as how far sound travels.

[wolves howling in distance]

Wolves scare me.

[wolves howling in distance]

Got to get the shelter done.

'Cause I don't want to
get my face eaten off.

[wolves howling in distance]

[suspenseful music]

♪ ♪

[yawning]

Last night was the
roughest night so far.

Those...

those wolves would
just not let up.

Luckily, nothing came
up against the...

shelter last night.

At least, I don't
think anything did.

That's all the more
reason to get that shelter

finished as fast as possible.

[suspenseful music]

I gotta get to work.

♪ ♪

[steady hammering]

♪

I need to get out of
the temporary shelter.

I need to be as safe as I can
from any kind of predators.

And it's just gonna get
colder and colder and colder,

so I'm gonna push and do as
much in one day as I can.

Around about right there.

Like so.

It's gonna go about right here

and drop straight down.

That should make 16 feet.

Psh, psh, psh, psh.

Basically what I'm doing is

I'm cutting out these
corners of the ceiling.

I'm taking away
some of my space.

That way, I have
less to heat up.

I think in the long run,

that's gonna be a pretty
big calorie-saver.

Let's go shopping
for some poles.

I know that there might
be, like, the question of

why am I not going harder
after fish and after game?

I'm trying to set
myself up long-term.

When it comes to the cold, like,

you're burning calories to
try to keep yourself warm.

And so I'm doing smaller

so that I can
actually move into it

and then I can just keep
adding walls to the inside

to provide more insulation
as it gets colder.

I think in the long
run, digging in,

framing up is the way to go.

And once everything's together,

we'll just tie these at the top.

It's a solid wall.

When I'm done, this place
is gonna be b*mb-proof.

♪ ♪

[exhales]

I gotta be careful
standing up so quick.

It's easy to forget how
much I haven't eaten.

♪ ♪

Raining a little.

All right. We need my tarp.

[rain pattering]

♪

Oh. [Laughs]

Yes. Oh, yes. Oh! [laughs]

New shelter. New shelter.

I can stand up.

Oh, I'm so excited.

♪

This tree has a little
bird's nest in it.

That's cool.

I wonder if this would be
good for starting a fire.

Probably. A literal
bird's nest.

Usually when you make a fire,

you take a whole bunch
of really dry material,

and you shape it into a
ball with a little crevice

in the center, and you
call it a bird's nest.

And here, I literally
have a bird's nest.

That's really cool.

So there's moose around here,
'cause there's moose hairs

in this bird's nest.

Save that for a cold day.

OK. We continue the shelter.

♪

So I would like to cut all
the poles for this side.

♪

About...

♪

I love my shelter.
It's a great shelter.

It's a simple A-frame attached
to a big tree, so it's strong.

One side is facing north,

so that's where the main
winds are gonna come.

I'm gonna leave all the trees
there to be a wind block.

And then the other
side is facing south.

And I'm thinking that
maybe I can capture

some radiant heat from the sun

and then all the spruce
boughs is insulation.

♪

It is small,

but I'm willing to sacrifice
a little bit of comfort

so that I'm staying
warm and safe.

♪ I need another tree ♪

♪ ♪

I grew up out in the trap
line, being homeschooled.

And I always thought
my world was so small.

All I wanted to do was
just go to the real world.

That's what I called it.

So I went to university.

And when I got to the city,

I wanted to experience
everything all at once.

So I was going to
all the parties,

I was in all the sports.

I tried it all out, from
the good to the bad.

But I was trying to
fit in some other box

that was not me at all.

And then one day,

I had a complete
mental breakdown.

And I was hospitalized.

And my mom came
rushing to the city

and she's like, "You
need to come home."

And the first thing
that really healed me

when I got home
was the quietness.

There was no traffic.
There was no machines.

There was just nature,

and I could just really be safe.

[chopping]

♪

[rustling in forest]

[animal calling]

[rustling in forest]

[tense music]

[rustling in forest continuing]

♪ ♪

[animal screeches]

[animal screeches]

Oh, my God.

[rustling in forest]

[animal screeches]

It's a marten hunting rabbit.

[tense music]

♪

Hey.

♪ ♪

Hey.

♪ ♪

Oh, my God.

What?

This place is wild, man.

Oh, man.

Look at that.

Fresh rabbit.

[soft upbeat music]

I guess I'm skinning
some rabbit.

♪ ♪

After my college experience,

the land healed and
gave me a new education.

It's like I found purpose again.

Now, rabbit skin
is very fragile.

[soft suspenseful music]

So if you want it to be intact,

you kind of have to be gentle.

The Cree philosophy of
teaching is kinisitohten.

That's the Cree word
for "Do you understand?"

And that's something that

my dad has asked me
throughout my life.

"Kinisitohten?"

It's not a written language,

so the way that Cree
people teach is by showing.

And my dad isn't really, like,
explaining things beforehand.

I would just have to
start helping him out

and copying his actions and
figuring it out on the go.

[soft suspenseful music]

And then eventually, it
becomes part of your body

because you've been doing
it with your own hands.

♪ ♪

Inspect the liver.

So now, I'm just
gonna start slicing.

And then when you can
say "ninistohten,"

which means "I understand,"

that means you can actually
teach someone else.

And now I'm showing other people

my knowledge, what I'm doing.

Whoo. That's amazing.

♪

All right. Here
it is, my rabbit.

[fire crackling]

Oh, my gosh. It's so good.

Wow.

Thank you for this
gift of rabbit.

Normally, I don't
like rabbit that much.

But I must be out
here a long time,

because this is delicious.

That is so good.

[suspenseful music]

♪ ♪

I keep seeing fish hitting
on this point right here.

So I got this whitefish.
We're gonna try that as bait.

[splashing]

Try here.

A school of whitefish
in front of me.

Whitefish, how do you feel about

a little bit of cannibalism?

♪ ♪

How's that sound?

♪

They're not into
that, apparently.

♪ ♪

I'm about ready to indulge
in a little cannibalism.

About ready to creep into the
next "Alone" survivalist area

and...

cut myself a femur to chew on.

Just kidding, of course.

Just kidding.

♪

But I'm not kidding
about these whitefish

needing to become cannibalistic.

'Cause this morning,

they were going bananas
all along the edge.

Now that the sun's
out and bright,

they moved out a bit.

Nature's gonna be throwing
curve ba*ls left and right

every day,

but I'm ready.

There's a lot of
subtle cues in nature

that a lot of people
might not pick up on,

but you spend enough
time out there,

and you can read everything
sort of like a book.

You just got to know
what to look for.

♪ ♪

Dude, come on back.

Pike's right at my feet.

[tense music]

[gasps]

♪

Ooh.

Ah. [chuckling] I lost him.

Dude.

[sighs]

That was insane, man.

Damn it, fish.

You're k*lling me.

We gotta go fish that river.

It's worth taking the
time at our money spot.

[suspenseful music]

♪ ♪

He stared right at me,

came up out of the grass
that I had it packed in.

There's a freaking mink

eating my meat in my meat cache.

I better get leather
gloves in case

I have to grab him.

Mink can bite like the devil.

♪ ♪

I'm going to scare it away.

It's in my meat cache right now.

♪

♪ ♪

Hoo, hoo, hoo, hoo!

[rustling]

Freaking mink.

There you go. Good.
Get out of here, you.

Yeah, mink tracks for sure.

He's run here two days in a row.

I know he'll be back,
plus probably others.

Yeah, he chewed up
the heart really good.

Look.

That's the moose heart,

and he's eaten the whole
bottom end of it off.

So I have a problem now.

Any little thing
that gets in there

is going for the fat
first, so I'm gonna...

I'm gonna start
rendering this fat,

because the fat is the most
precious commodity out here.

♪

It's hard to build
something out here

that would be mink-proof.

And pine martens are
the same way, same size.

They can get through that stuff.

That's a big problem.

I've got to do something
about that meat.

[sizzling]

I know one thing.

I've got to start
making some containers

and rendering the fat,

'cause the fat is the first
thing everything goes for.

And the fat is what
I need the most.

So I'm gonna start cooking
it down a bit each day

as fast as I can cook
it through this pot.

I don't know how else to
keep it away from everything.

♪ ♪

[dramatic music]

♪

[sizzling]

♪ ♪

I have to save the fat.

Starting to render
this down pot by pot.

[hissing]

It's sealing.

Yeah.

This birch bark lard canister.

And I'll make more
of these and just

fill them with rendered lard.

All right.

I should be moving
into my shelter,

but it's big enough, I think,
to smoke a whole moose,

so I'm staying in a tarp.

This is just one of many,
many huge hunks of meat.

What I'm gonna do is
just strip it pretty thin

and get it on a bunch
of skewers like this

and hang it in racks
inside the smoker.

♪ ♪

This is good. Putting
up food in the fall.

Food for winter.

Some of my best
childhood memories

are putting up food in
the fall with my family.

I'm one of 11 kids.

We grew everything we ate;

green beans, apple sauce,
tomatoes, venison...

to keep it any way we could.

We didn't have a
refrigerator, you see,

we had no electricity.

Fresh stuff is
just so delicious.

[soft upbeat music]

I'm torn about smoking this
much meat right in my camp.

There's decent-sized bear
tracks that I've seen

three times now
close to my camp.

But I don't have the luxury
of choosing another option,

so I'm just going forward.

The silence out here
and the isolation

has really brought me
to a point of thinking

about other
situations in my life,

doubts that start
pouring into my mind.

It's all very dirty

because that mink
wallowed in it.

Not real proud of my
butchering right now

because I'm in a rush.

All it is is just functional
and adequate at the moment.

Nothing beautiful.

♪ ♪

When I was a kid,

my parents viewed society
as becoming really godless

and wanted to protect
their children from that.

But at the time,
what I got instead

was the message that
God hated everybody.

I remember living
every day thinking

that I wasn't
worthy of, you know,

the food that I was eating.

Like, I could never
deserve to exist.

And I thought you could
compensate for that feeling

by hard work.

It's time to get
this thing done.

[suspenseful music]

♪ ♪

Look at all this meat.

Rows and rows and rows

and rows and rows of
it all the way back.

I'm just about to fire it up.

The smell of fresh
meat coming from there

is almost overwhelming.

And I've never had such an urge
to just eat it just like it is.

Controlling the
airflow to the fire

is what's gonna make
it smolder and smoke

and not just burn
and cook the meat.

So yeah, I think
it's gonna work.

[fire crackling]

♪ ♪

As a child, trying to
be worthy of living

made me basically suicidal
through my teenage years.

And even afterwards as an adult,

I remember it just becoming
such a reality for me

that I could not be enough
for God or for people.

But now, somehow,
out here with nature,

I'm starting to find a
peace and balance with God

about my story somehow.

♪

Hoo.

This is a pot of total goodness.

God's bounty.

So I'm gonna sit
here and eat my fill.

If I'm a tough person,

it's because of my dad
diligently teaching that.

I love him for that.

That's because of my mother,
the person who she was

raising 11 kids and
schooling them all.

I love her for that.

And out here, I'm
actually feeling

just incredible joy in my soul

that I exist, that I live.

I smell cooler
weather on the wind.

And I thank God for it.

[suspenseful music]

♪ ♪

[beat boxing]

♪ ♪

Welcome, man.

Welcome to "Alone's"
first freaking rave.

[beat boxing]

I think this smoke's
starting to make

my head go a little bit wrong.

[beat boxing]

What is wrong with my head?

I'm not thinking nearly as
clearly as I'd normally do.

Ugh.

[fire crackling]

Let's go fishing.

Because Dub is hungry.

♪ ♪

Couple more days of no food,

and I will probably fall
into a downward spiral.

Today has got to be a good one.

♪

I need to start
focusing on food again.

♪

There's my pike
club right there.

I'm gonna make a bush craft...

situation here.

So this is gonna make it
so that when a pike hits,

this rig that I'm making

is gonna set the hook
automatically on the pike.

So this is gonna be...

pretty much what you
call an L7 trigger.

So it's two triggers that
sit together like that.

So when this trigger,

the top trigger, gets
pulled off, boom.

This stick...

that I'm carving right here...

is gonna get jammed
into the ground.

And then I'm gonna get a nice,
super spring-loaded tree,

and I can set the
hook on the fish.

Probably from about
age seven or eight,

I decided I wanted to
be a pro fisherman,

so I bought a bass boat

and won a bunch of
bass tournaments.

Turns out gas for bass
boats is really expensive.

There was a time I had
just enough gas in my boat

and my truck to make
it to the tournament.

But in the back of my
truck was a trash bag

filled with pop cans.

And in Michigan, they
have a 10¢ refund on cans.

"I'm like, "If I don't win it,

"I'm gonna have to
turn these pop cans in

and get, like, four bucks
and maybe get home."

So I risked all my money that
I had to pay the entry fee.

That's actually really easy.

So I'm just tying them.

Overhand loop.

Now, I want to tie it
right around the area

where this trigger is.

So I go there, win
the bass tournament.

I win, like, 5 grand.

And fortunately, I didn't
have to use my pop cans.

That's how poor I am and
how much I love fishing.

♪ ♪

So we want one more loop.

Probably right about there.

And they fit on each other.

So when something pulls even
pretty lightly right there...

it's gonna pull this
trigger off that,

and this rod's gonna
spring like crazy.

Something's happening
on this one.

Something just hit.

That's definitely got it.

I'm gonna give it a little line.

[suspenseful music]

Hmm.

Hook set right there, boy.

♪

He's coming.

[splashing]

♪

Good size.

It's a really good size.

[splashing]

♪

Hell yeah, little pike.

[fish groans] Yeah.

♪ ♪

Yes! Dude.

Put them up on
these pine boughs.

[imitates impact sound]

Oh, hell.

I weakened ya.

And what I'm gonna do is

cast this one back out...

and let it fish while
I clean that pike.

There's gonna be
a time frame where

the river starts to freeze
and I can't ice fish.

Can't walk on the ice till
it's at least 4 inches.

So I'm gonna be snaring.

I'm gonna do hunting and
trapping, everything.

Fishing will not
get you all the way,

no matter how good
you are at it.

So I want to try to
bring this one in

without triggering it

and put a fresh piece
of bait on there.

And right then... look at that.

Right then, something's
grabbing that.

Look at that.

That line's moving right now.

♪ ♪

That's game on.

♪ ♪

Holy crap. Are you kidding me?

[dramatic music]

Boom!

♪ ♪

Got him.

♪ ♪

Coming right at me.

♪

Yeah.

Yes, yes, yes, yes,
yes. Yes, yes, yes, yes.

♪

Get in here, bro. Mm, mm.

Yeah!

[panting]

Thank you, spring pole.

He wasn't coming
off that big hook.

Oh, my goodness.

That is so amazing, dude.

Rod demonstration, done.

And I could not be
any freaking happier.

[soft upbeat music]

'Cause it's freaking lunch time!

♪ ♪

I love nature more
than anything.

Nature is honest.

People, in general,
are not honest.

But fish aren't
gonna lie to you.

The grizzly bear is
not gonna lie to you.

Grizzly bear is
just gonna k*ll you.

It's not hiding that fact.

So I strongly believe that

you're never gonna beat nature.

But when nature throws
you a tidal wave,

you build a bush craft
surfboard and ride it out.

I'm so happy we got
that spring pole.

Yes.

[dramatic music]

♪

[leaves rustling]

♪ ♪

I'm gonna go get
some more water.

[sniffles]

[sighs]

Look at that.

It's a happy family of swans.

[sighs]

That's what I want.

I want to start a family.

♪ ♪

I really want my future kids
to see the possibilities

of a life living
close to the land.

And I hope that I inspire
them to follow in my footsteps

like I'm following my
parents' footsteps.

[soft upbeat music]

♪

Got some water.

Boil it and then
get back to work.

♪ ♪

I thought this would
be a really good spot

to set up a squirrel pole.

Because there is a very
active squirrel here.

[squirrel squeaking]

♪

[exhales]

♪

I feel so alone.

I feel really alone, and
it's really hard for me.

It's hard for my mentality.

[soft suspenseful music]

I just... I came into this
game so mentally strong.

I thought I was so strong.

And then I came out here

and I just feel like
my brain is struggling.

It's mentally really
tough out here.

I don't like it. [chuckles]

[sighs]

♪ ♪

I feel like I'm
going back and forth

between feeling
great success here

and then feeling anxiety,

almost a sense of
depression coming in

because I feel so disconnected.

[sniffles]

I live in an isolated
place, far away from people

and I've spent a
lot of time alone.

♪ ♪

But this feels
different somehow.

It's really isolated here.

I've chosen this path,
but this extreme sense

of being taken away from
my family and my culture

and placed in this environment
that I'm unfamiliar with

is really instilling in me

that feeling of what
it might be like

to be taken away to
a residential school.

♪ ♪

I didn't think
that these feelings

would come up out here.

I thought this was in my past.

I mean, one place that
I feel most healthy

is when I'm in nature.

But for some reason, there is
a huge piece of me missing.

♪

Oh, I just wanted
to be out here.

[sobs]

At the same time, I feel,

as an Indigenous woman,

I need to keep staying here,

that I need to keep
pushing myself.

[sighs and sniffles]

♪ ♪

[sobbing]

♪ ♪

It [bleep] sucks.

[sniffles]

And everything is fine.
Everything's good.

[sniffles] My shelter
is getting warmer.

I have food.

♪

I'll just keep going.

♪

Come on. Just one more day.

Just one more day.

[dramatic music]

[dramatic music]

♪

You know...

the more time I spend here,

the more I want to be with
someone that is from here,

the Gwich'in and Aleut.

I want them to show me how
much they love this land,

what they know about this land.

[suspenseful music]

I came here with skills
enough to feed me,

to shelter me, to keep
me alive and thriving.

♪ ♪

This is an amazing
experience for me.

♪

But I wish I was with someone.

♪ ♪

I just want to get
through the isolation.

So I want to go
check the fishnet.

♪

Look at that.

[soft upbeat music]

♪ ♪

[sighs]

♪ ♪

[bleep]. [chuckles]

It just didn't feel
right, keeping that fish.

I need to honor it.

I need to eat it with joy.

[sniffles]

Ugh.

[somber music]

♪ ♪



[sniffles] I got this far.

I got this far.

♪ ♪

Oh, what the heck? [sniffles]

♪

I don't want to go
to that place again.

I don't want to have
another mental breakdown

that I can't come back from
that takes me years and years.

♪ ♪

It's a delicate balance

and you really
got to be careful.

♪ ♪

This is a nice
place. [sniffles]

It'll always be in my memories.

[electronic beep]

It's time to call in.

Hi, this is Michela. I'm
officially tapping out.

[dramatic music]

♪ ♪

I just couldn't deal with the
social isolation aspect of it.

[sniffles]

I needed to be connected
again to people,

to my family, to my home.

[soft dramatic music]

It's been a really
beautiful time here.

I've had so many blessings.

And this competition has
made me understand that

I am the Saskatchewan
River Delta,

I am my home, I am my family,

and I really feel
that in my heart now.

♪ ♪

It's really disappointing
to have to go home so early,

but this experience
has taught me

something even deeper than
I've ever known before.

Finally, I can say "ninistohten"

because now, I
understand completely

how being Indigenous is more
than just living off the land.

We need community.
We need connection.

And I'm feeling a
really strong calling

to go home with a new
sense of how to share

what I know about Cree culture.

I need to take people
out into nature,

onto the canoe trips,

and we can just connect
deeply to each other.

♪ ♪

I came here to take
care of my family.

But now, I realize that
there's no way to separate us.

We're stronger together.

So I feel like I am
going home with a prize.

♪ ♪

They're doing med
check sometime today.

I must be getting sick.

[dramatic music]

Kind of nervous.

How thorough is the med check?

♪ ♪

My stomach is
feeling really lean.

I'm actually worried
about this med check.

OK, that's sore.

I've thought about whether
or not I should just

grit my teeth and fake
it through this check.

We need to officially extract
you for medical reasons.

♪