01x02 - Fighting Mother

[bunniefuu]

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[Growling]

Everything's twisting!

[Beeping]

That's because you're moving parallel

to the space distortion.

It's the shortest way back home.

[Groans]

Huh?

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This is terrible, Summer!

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[Beeping]

[Groans] Whoa!
What the hell?!

[Beeping]

[Groans]
Oh, crap.

[Film reel rolling]

["Love is Entropy"
plays in Japanese]

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[Rock music plays]

Hey, Summer.
What's up?

Space Mom!
I've lost sight of Grandpa.

It's all right.
I'm still tracking him fine.

Not the dummy one.
I mean the real Rick.

Well, that sounds like my dad.

If he needs to figure
out a way back, he can.

Freaking out
just makes us look stupid.

Um, I think the situation is a
little more serious than that.

Ugh, you're right.

It does seem like
it's a bit more serious.

Uh! Wait a sec.

[Beeping]

Things look like they're
about to get interesting.

Only the best for Rick Sanchez!

Just look at the fleet
they sent to escort you.

Wow. It's a bunch of turds
put into a dung heap.

Laugh while you can.
No help is coming for you.

Aye!

[Groans]

Did I break your nose?

Well, it's no skin off my ba*ls
if nobody comes.

[Beeping]

Could be the chance
to wipe them out.

Once I finish kicking a*s
over here, I'll head your way.

Mm.

Space Mom, please hurry.

You know, time doesn't really
matter, Summer,

especially
when it comes to my dad.

Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa!
God damn it!

Not gonna throw up!
[Whirring]

[Birds chirping]

Huh?

[Groans]

[Door opens]

- Well, we're off.
- Hmm?

I guess we'll see you later,
Dad.

[Birds chirping]

- Oh!
- [Crying]

Aw, Morty. It's okay.

Are you sure you don't
want to come with us, Dad?

Just forget about me.
Go enjoy yourselves.

Hmm.

[Birds chirping]

[Beeps]

People usually use the cover of
night to ghost their families.

Hmm?

So, you're the dickhead
who made this, aren't you?

Space b*stards requesting
backup.

This is our chance to squash
those damn maggots flat.

Let's move!

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[Beeping]

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[Clanging]

What the hell was that?

Huh?

[Both groaning]

[Whirring]

Hmm? Aah!

[Whirring]

[Beeping]

Huh?

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Hello?

[Groans]

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[Beeps]

[Rock music plays]

[Gasps]

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Mm.

Uh, yeah?

I wouldn't bother
putting up a fight

if I were you.

[Weapons c*ck]

[Weapons c*ck]

Because I won't

hesitate to blow up
the whole room if I have to.

Mm!

[Groans]

I just knew
that you'd come here.

And you ended up
just like your husband.

Hate to break it to you,

but taking me hostage
won't work on my dad.

I'd never do anything so petty.

Let's settle our score,
shall we?

So, I take it you're
Rick C-137, right?

The one who stole my invention
and my family.

I'm not here
to clean up your mess.

And I don't give a damn
about this device.

I'm not gonna create it, use it,
or steal the stupid thing.

- Besides...
- Hmm?

...I'm the one
who saved Beth's life.

Ha! You sacrificed yourself
like an idiot

by being emotional.

It's hard to believe,

but I guess I have that crap
they call "sincerity" in me.

And those two died
because of that crap.

Mistakes were made.

Honestly, I wish I had been
enough of an arrogant d*uche

to create the portal g*n.

[Sighs]

I was planning
to get the hell out of here,

but I guess that's
not happening, huh?

I'll let you go on your way,

but only after I punch you
in the face a few times.

[Crying] Oh, man,

that was the only love
I'll ever have.

Oh, please. What, were you
gonna stay in there forever?

- Space Mom, are you there?
- Sorry, Summer.

I've got my hands full
right now.

I'll have to call you back.

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I think they call that
an unfair advantage.

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[Weapon clicks]

[Groans]

[Growls]

[Humming]

Time's up, loser.

Hmm?

Now it's my time to shine,
moron.

Huh?

Aahhh!

[Clanging, groaning]

The rebels are attacking us!

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I'm gonna get the hell
out of here!

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Why would you spare me?

Well, I didn't do it for you,
Tammy.

Hmm. I know what it's like
to have kids.

[Gasps]

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[expl*si*n in distance]

I'm willing
to call it a draw this time.

Bye. For now.

[Panting]

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[Groaning]

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I'm not just gonna
let you hit me.

Fine by me.

This wouldn't be
any fun otherwise.

- Gotcha!
- Aah!

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[Both yelling]

- Huh?
- Oh, my back!

You just shifted dimensions
without using the portal g*n.

The two of us
are from different dimensions.

Our bodies interacting must
be causing dimensional havoc.

Our mass back
in the original world

should have converted
into energy by now.

[Whirring, crackling]

Mr. President,

a huge source of energy
has appeared in the sky

above the Smith house.

Aah! Not again.
That mother [bleep]!

So, what do I gotta do
to leave this dimension?

Hug you?

Or we can just punch each other.

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[Groans]

- Where the hell are we now?
- A fissure in space-time.

Now it's time for round two!

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There's only one thing
you're wrong about.

I'm not the person
who made that device

because I already put it to use,
idiot!

If so, then what I saw
earlier was your family

from after the reset?

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Aah!

Eeh! Aah!

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Let me get this straight.

You were just gonna
throw that family away.

I guess even rebirth
can't cure you of being a...

I'm the only reason

you even have a place
to exist right now!

Think twice before
going ballistic on me.

You had this coming.

You let Beth marry Jerry,
of all people.

[Beeping]

Magnificent!

We can solve all
of the world's energy problems

- with this matter.
- Really?

There's an unidentified fleet
of aircraft

heading straight
for our air space, sir.

Here come the damn hyenas!

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Come one inch
into our territory.

I dare you!
It's an air-space violation.

We'll blow every last one
of you sky-high.

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It's sickening doing
a version of me like you.

You don't get to tell me
how to live my life!

[Both yelling]

[Groaning]

[Groaning]

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[Whirring, crackling]

Sir, the energy source
has vanished.

Damn!

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We're really better off

not solving the energy crisis,
anyway.

[Both yelling]

Ooh!

[Grunts]

[Groans]

Just go.

You can let me take care of Beth
and the others.

Do you even have a way
back home?

Hmm.

Wow, reality sure is convenient.

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["The Other Side"
by Ayuko Saito plays]

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Huh?

Huh?

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Uh...[Gasps]

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[Electricity crackles]