02x19 - Alcatraz Mataz/Oahu Wahoo

[bunniefuu]

♪ Hakuna matata ♪

♪ what a wonderful phrase ♪

♪ hakuna matata ♪

♪ ain't no passing craze ♪

♪ it means no worries ♪

♪ for the rest of your days ♪

♪ it's our problem-free ♪

♪ philosophy ♪

♪ hakuna matata ♪

♪ yeah! ♪

♪ Hakuna matata! ♪

♪ Timon and Pumbaa! ♪

♪ Hakuna matata! ♪

♪ It means no worries ♪

♪ for the rest of your days ♪

♪ it's our problem-free ♪

♪ philosophy ♪

♪ hakuna matata ♪

♪ Timon and Pumbaa ♪

Now see here, Rafiki,

I need more
particulars on this, eh...

Timon and Pumbaa duo.

Simba's royal
reputation is at stake.

And as you know, they have
quite an influence on him.

He still eats b-u-g-ss.

So why don't you talk to
Timon and Pumbaa yourself?

Oh, I tried,

but when I requested they fill out
the pride lands registration form,

they returned this.

Hee hee hee!

Ahem, and the data I have
managed to gather is minimal.

For example, we all know
why the warthog is an outcast,

what was his
gaseous talents and all,

but I have nothing
here about the meerkat.

Ah! Why Timon is an outcast.

h*-h*-h*-h*.

That is a story
most interesting.

Oh, I'm certain
it's a gripping tale,

but if you would be so kind

as to fill out these official
papers documenting the story.

I'll be back to
pick them up later.

I've got important
business with simba.

Noogh!

Make yourself comfortable.

And let old Rafiki
man tell you the tale.

It all began long ago in
an ordinary meerkat colony.

And if you do not know
the ways of meerkats,

let me tell you, my friend...

They are a strict
and efficient species.

Each meerkat in this colony

had a specific meerkat duty

which was performed
with precision.

There was the colony tailor,

the colony bookseller,

the grocer,

The front gate guard,

and, in Timon's case,
the back gate guard.

This was the most
tedious of meerkat duties,

for nobody ever
came to the back gate.

However,

Timon did have an unobstructed
view of the Duke meerkat's castle,

and, more importantly,

the Duke's daughter's window.

For you see,

Timon was in love.

Hey, look at you.

You're a peeping Timon.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Very funny, Fred.

Shouldn't you be
guardin' the castle?

Yep, but the Duke's
gone for the day,

so I ran over to the
grocery to get a snack.

So? Why you tellin' me?

Oh, I just thought you
might like to know...

Ahh.

The Duke left his
daughter home all alone.

Eh, it'll never happen
between me and Tatiana.

She wants somebody brave
and cunning and resourceful.

Nah. All you need
is candy, flowers...

And a bath.

But I can't abandon my post.

I'd be... banished.

Eh, that's not the worst
thing that could happen.

Oh, yes, it is.

Okay, so it is,

but you won't get banished
if you don't get caught.

See ya around, Romeo.

Hisss!

Yippee!

Hisss!

Snake!

Snake!

State your name
and purpose for visit.

Hisss!

Hey!

Holy, oh...

Yaah!

Hisss!

Ooh, looking good.

All that's left is this.

The Duke's daughter is dead?

How could this have happened?

Nothing passed the front gate.

And nobody ever
goes to the back gate.

Where's Timon?

Yes?

Know of anyone who
abandoned their post?

Eh...

Heh.

Get him!

Far away and fast.

Huh?

Oy.

Going up.

The tragic loss of my daughter

is the direct result of your failure
to perform your meerkat duty.

Timon Berkowitz,
you've been found guilty

of abandoning your guard post,

and your sentence
is... Banishment.

And that, Zazu, is how
Timon became an outcast.

But what happened to him?

A-A-And what about
the Duke's daughter?

And how did Timon meet Pumbaa?

Are you certain you have
time to hear all that, my friend?

I thought you had important
business with simba.

Simba schmimba.

Oh, the spoiled boy can wait.

Just tell me the
rest of the story.

Come on, come on!

Out with it, you silly,
blue-bottomed baboon.

Finish the story.

If you wish for me to
finish, then sit down

and pay ah-ten-shun!

That's more like it!

Timon had been cast
out of the meerkat colony

and now found himself
wandering the shadow-filled jungle,

lost and alone.

Heh?

Hmm...

♪ Yodel-ayee-oo... ♪

And where do you
think you're goin'?

Did the hyenas invite
you to dinner, too?

Ah, yeah. Sure.

First, we'll have a
catnip, What'cha think?

Hee hee! Yeah, yeah.
Yeah, yeah. Then... then...

We'll pig out!

Hey! What are you doing?

The hyenas don't want
to have us for dinner.

They want to have us for dinner!

Uh, you mean...
they're gonna eat us?

That was close!

Yeah, the circle of life
passed before my eyes.

But I'd say we made a
pretty good team, huh?

Yeah, we sure did.

Couldn't have
done it without ya.

Uh, yup.

Uh-huh.

Guess you'll be heading back
to your meerkat colony now, huh?

Huh? Oh, yeah, yeah.

Gotta get back
to the old colony.

Well, uh...

See ya.

Bye.

Bye.

Hey, what's the big idea?

Hey, why don't you
watch where you're going?

Say...

I thought you were going
back to the meerkat colony.

Heh? Oh, yeah, right.

Uh, well, the...

Hey, there goes our lunch!

You want to rustle up some grub?

Hop aboard!

Name's Pumbaa.

Nice to meet you,
Pumbaa. I'm Timon.

Oh, nice one, Timon.

Good one, Pumbaa.

Bravo!

Exquisite!

Bee-yootiful!

What was that?

I didn't hear anything!

It sounded like a...
a bird? An airplane?

A... a squeaky door!

Whew... and what's that smell?

A skunk! Or a skunk!

Or maybe a skunk!

No. No. I think
it's a... it's a...

Excuse me. Excuse me!

♪ Excuuuuuse me ♪

♪ it seems I'm always
saying pardon me ♪

♪ I find the feeling
so dismaying ♪

♪ but seems that
everywhere I go ♪

♪ they hold their nose ♪

♪ and tell me, "go away!" ♪

Away?

Away.

That bad, huh?

It stinks!

- Tell me about it!
- Okay.

♪ I've developed a
strong reputation ♪

♪ for malodorous appreciation ♪

♪ which has led
to my alienation ♪

♪ I'm only upset that I stink ♪

♪ yeah, well, now that
we're being so candid ♪

♪ I can say that I too,
have been branded ♪

♪ I was banished, and
here I am stranded ♪

♪ but, buddy, you
know what I think? ♪

♪ The world out there
can be so cold and mean ♪

♪ but, you and me ♪

♪ we're two-heads-is-
better-than-one-man-ain't-no-island ♪

♪ if you know what I mean ♪

Huh?

♪ Timon and Pumbaa,
Timon and Pumbaa ♪

♪ that sorta has a
catchy ring ♪ whee!

♪ Timon and Pumbaa,
Timon and Pumbaa ♪

♪ it sorta makes
you wanna sing ♪

♪ you could be lonely
out here forever ♪

♪ just thinking about
it makes me sad, but ♪

♪ Timon and Pumbaa
alone together ♪

♪ somehow that
doesn't sound so bad ♪

♪ I hear what you're
saying correctly ♪

♪ you could Cherish
and love and respect me ♪

♪ we can eat little
harmless insecties ♪

♪ and become the
bestest of friends ♪

♪ I don't want to go
burstin' your bubble ♪

♪ I'm just saying we'll
stay out of trouble ♪

♪ if the two of us
pair up and double ♪

♪ but don't ever
touch me again ♪

- Sorry.
- Sing.

♪ Timon and Pumbaa,
Timon and Pumbaa ♪

♪ a meerkat and a big warthog ♪

♪ Timon and Pumbaa,
Timon and Pumbaa ♪

♪ no finer pair of underdogs ♪

♪ and we'll go lonely,
out here forever ♪

♪ no matter how
it came to pass ♪

♪ Timon and Pumbaa,
Timon and Pumbaa ♪

♪ when we're
together it's a gas ♪

♪ Timon and Pumbaa,
Timon and Pumbaa ♪

♪ when we're
together it's a gas ♪

This is the life, huh?

Yeah. I thought it was going
to be lonely being alone,

you know what, Timon?

I think if I had to choose

between everything in
the world I could ever want

and being your friend,

I'd choose being your friend.

Well, Pumbaa,

I think I'd choose
being your friend, too.

What'd you say, Timon?

Huh? Oh, nothing.

Ooh!

What was that?

She's still alive!

Ohh... It starts.

But Pumbaa, that's
the Duke's daughter.

We rescue her, I'll be accepted
back into the meerkat colony

and get married and be rich and
healthy and happy and not alone!

Good for you.

Don't you get it?

You can live at the
colony, too, and best of all,

no longer will
you be an outcast!

Yay!

Eeh!

Yaa!

Hakuna matata!

Sugar plum!

Father!

Timon, because of
the brave, cunning,

and resourceful
rescue of my daughter,

the charges against
you are dropped.

And as a reward,
I present to you

the key to the city.

That's it?

No, no, no, no. You
get all that stuff, too.

And, Timon, my hero,

I offer you my hand in marriage.

Oh, boy, oh, boy,
oh, boy, Timon!

Everything's happening
just like you said it would.

Ah, speaking of which, Duke,

now that I'm your
son-in-law and all,

I want you to declare
my outcast pal here

an official member
of meerkat society.

But, Timon, this is
a meerkat colony.

Thus, only meerkats
are allowed to live here.

Your point being?

No warthogs.

No worries, Pumbaa.

Listen here, pal. You know,

I couldn't have rescued sugar
plum over there without his help,

so, get to declarin'.

I'm sorry, Timon, but you're
going to have to choose.

Power, riches, and love,

or the stinky warthog.

Oh, well. That's that.

No more time to
finish the story.

What?

Why?

You have that important
business with simba.

Surely you are due back by now?

Oh, he probably just
needed his diaper changed.

I'll catch up to him later.

Too late. Ha!

He already caught up with you.

Sire!

Hello, Zazu.

I'm here to have
my diaper changed.

Go on, Rafiki. Finish the story.

Very good, simba.

Timon was having to choose

between everything in the
world he could ever want

or being Pumbaa's friend.

Are you sure you wanna
give up all that stuff for me?

Yeah, don't you worry about it.

In fact, from this day forward,

neither one of us are going
to worry about anything.

No worries for the
rest of our days.

Yay!

You know, we should give this
new philosophy of ours a name.

How about

hakuna matata?

Where did that come from?

Oh, that's a
whole 'nother story!