02x12 - The Catwoman from Channel Six

[bunniefuu]

♪ Teenage mutant
ninja turtles ♪

♪ teenage mutant
ninja turtles ♪

♪ teenage mutant
ninja turtles ♪

♪ heroes in a half shell ♪

♪ turtle power ♪

♪ they're the world's
most fearsome fighting team ♪

We're really hip.

♪ They're heroes
in the half shell ♪

♪ and they're green ♪

Hey, get a grip.

♪ When the evil shredder
attacks ♪

♪ these turtle boys
don't cut him no slack ♪

♪ teenage mutant
ninja turtles ♪

♪ teenage mutant
ninja turtles ♪

♪ splinter taught them
to be ninja teens ♪

He's a radical rat.

♪ Leonardo leads,
donatello does machines ♪

That's a fact, Jack.

♪ Raphael is cool
but rude ♪

Give me a break.

♪ Michelangelo
is a party dude ♪

♪ teenage mutant
ninja turtles ♪

♪ teenage mutant
ninja turtles ♪

♪ teenage mutant
ninja turtles ♪

♪ heroes in a half shell ♪

♪ turtle power ♪




[LOUD ROARING]

[WOMAN SCREAMS]

Whoa, outrageous.

This is the part
where the slime monster

scarfs up the entire
city of Cleveland.

I warn you,

too much television
warps the mind

and promotes
violence.

Right.
You bet.

You're right,
master. Uh-huh.

What's this
thing, boss?

Another toy
from krang?

It happens to be a state-of-the-art
matter transporter.

With it, I can transmit an
object anywhere in the world.

Like what?

Like sending two ill-mannered
slobs to the city dump.

Huh?
What's this place?

Maybe it's one of them
nouvelle cuisine restaurants.

Whoa!
Whoa!

Whoa!
Whoa!

I guess they want
to make sure

you wash
before you eat.

Aah!

Oh, awesome.

Who's the slime monster
gonna scarf up next?

Who cares as long as she's
a real good screamer.

[GASPS]

It's the
ninja turtles!

Rocksteady
and bebop!

We're gonna turn you guys
into turtle mush!

Now it's my turn,
wart-breath.

Beginner's luck.

[GROWLS]

Let's get it on,
tusk-teeth.

Oh, no! He's turned our TV
set into a vast wasteland.

This time,
he's gone too far.

Turtle power!
Turtle power!

I'm coming
to help you, bebop.

Not really, dude.
Hyah!

I think those idiots
have learned

their lesson by now.
Ha ha ha!

Scat! Get away!

No! Look out!

Blasted cat!

All right, chumps!

They've
disappeared.

Whoa!
Like vaporized!

I am pleased you have at last
turned down the television.

Oh! Why'd you bring
us back, boss?

Yeah. We was just
about to pulverize

them shell backs.

You found the turtles'
hiding place?

We sure did.

Quickly. What was
the exact location?

Well, let's see...

Um...First,
we went this way.

Then, um...
We went that way.

I think we turned left.
Or was it right?

Or was it down
and then up?

All them sewers
looks alike to me.

Silence!

Serves me right for using
cheap mutant labor.

Oh, bummer, man.

Could you fix it,
donatello?

I don't know.
It looks pretty far gone.

You mean we're gonna miss
it came from the sewers?

Well, that's
my favorite flick!

Don't panic, fellas.
Maybe April can help us.

This is April O'Neill,
channel 6 news,

speaking with
this year's winner

of the fat cabbies contest,
myron bimbleton.

Tell us, what is the
secret of your success?

Uh, chili burgers
and onions.

Lots of onions.

Ohh, you said
a mouthful, myron.

This is April O'Neill.
Channel 6 news.

Ok. That's
a wrap.

Really, Vernon,

why must I do these idiotic
human interest stories?

Because the public
eats them up.

Right. With
lots of onions.

My, aren't
we grumpy.

[BEEP] April here.
What's up, guys?

We've got an emergency
and we need your help.

Now, this sounds
like a real story.

Uh...Yeah, right.

There are these gigantic
alligators in the sewer.

Fantastic! I'll bring
my video camera.

We'd rather you brought
a spare TV instead.

Huh?

Ohh! You got me
over here

so you could watch a movie about
alligators in the sewers?

Exactamundo.

Awesome flick,
isn't it?

Hey, you guys want
to hold it down?

You're drowning out
all the screams.

What happened here?
World w*r III?

Not quite. There was a fight
with 2 of shredder's th*gs.

Here? But how?

This sewer home of yours is the
best-kept secret in the city

they must have used some
form of matter transporter.

Wow. That would
make some story.

If we could find
shredder's hideout.

Chinese food?

Don't tell me that you guys
have given up pizza?

It's rocksteady
and bebop's.

It's not bad enough
they trashed the place,

they also left
their garbage!

Woo's oriental
palace. Hmm.

Uh...So long, guys.
Enjoy your movie.

Hey, she can't go
to woo's by herself.

That place is really bad.

The food is
even worse.

We better
follow her.

Something tells me
I shouldn't be doing this,

but here goes.

Yuck.
What a dive.

Hyah!

Excuse me.
Are you Mr. woo?

I am woo.
Who are you?

I'm April O'Neill,
a TV reporter.

Hmm. We do not like
nosy reporters.

Oh. Uh...I'm not
that kind of reporter.

I'm a restaurant critic.

Hey!

Mmm. Delicious.

Did you serve a couple of
weird-looking customers

in the last hour?
One that looks like a rhino

and the other looks
like a wart hog.

Hmm. I remember them.
They wore Halloween masks.

They came from warehouse
at end of pier.

Thanks. I'll recommend
this place to my friends.

Hey, shorty,
where's my won tons?

Aah!

All out of won tons.

This must be the matter transporter
splinter talked about.

I'd better back this story
up with some photos.

[CAMERA CLICKING]

[MEOW]

Scat, kitty.
You're in my shot.

W-what happened?

I--I feel so woozy.

[GASPS] What's going on?

IRMA: April?

[MEOWING]

April, you know the landlord
doesn't allow pets.

What could I do, Irma?
They followed me home.

Wow, what a day.

I feel like something
the cat dragged in.

Gee. Let me fix you
something to eat.

That sounds good.

First, I'll feed
your furry friends.

You're a nice person
for a human.

How's that
again?

Don't mind
me-ow, Irma.

I'm so tired, I don't
know what I'm saying.

Mm-hmm.
Well, I'll leave you

so you can take
a little cat nap.

Ooh. I thought
she'd never leave.

You know,
I'm getting pretty bored

with these private eye
disguises.

Sorry, fellas,

but our French poodle suits
are still at the cleaners.

Quit griping, guys. We're
trying to help April.

And this is where
we'll find her.

Uh-oh.
I smell trouble.

Phew. Can't smell worse
than the food.

Who are you supposed to be,
Humphrey bogus?

You hit the nail right
on the head, sweetheart.

Yeah! Now, listen here,
you mugs.

I'm giving the orders
around here, see?

All right,
so I don't do bogart.

Enough stalling!

You turkeys are about
to get plucked.

Wrong, bozo!

We're turtles,
not turkeys.

Ohh, I'm going to
make turtle stew.

This one's on me, fellas.
Hyah!

Back at you,
cabbage heads. Unh!

Allow me.

Unh! Unh! Unh!

Man, there's nothing like a furious,
fun-filled, food flinging fight!

Try saying that
three times fast.

VERNON: One minute
to air time, April.

[HISS]

Was it
something I said?

Meo-out! Out! Out!

Well, there's no need
to get catty.

April, I'm worried.

You're not acting at all
like yourself.

You'd better go, Irma.
Nowww!

Not until you tell
me what's going on!

I went to the hideout of thisss
character called shredder.

I was taking pictures
of sssome machine...

[MEOW]

When sssomething
happened to me-ow!

Gosh.
Oh, my gosh.

It's turned you
into a cat.

Yesss. That's why
I must go back

and reverse what happened.
[MEOW]

No way!

I'm not letting you
out of this room!

[HISS]

Of course, if you
insist on going...

Don't worry
about me-ow.

My best friend
has turned into a cat.

I don't know whether to call 911
or the animal shelter.

What's this?

Some kind of
weird walkie-talkie?

Hello? Hello?

Those kung fu guys
turned out to be

a bunch of
chicken lo meins.

Yeah, with the accent
on "lo."

IRMA: Hello,
is anyone there?

Who are you?

Never mind that.
Who are you?

I'm Leonardo.

[GASPS] Ohh!
You really are a turtle.

Congratulations, lady.

You just won the
national wildlife award.

April's in trouble. If you
care anything about her,

meet me at the subway
station at 4th and Broadway

and I'll explain
everything.

We're on our way.

Ok, guys,
it's turtle time!

[HISS]

I mussst remember which
buttons the cat touched.

Someone is
snooping around.

Hey, you!

[HISSES]

[Me-oww]

What do you know,
it's half animal.

Yeah, just like us.

Miss O'Neill, what
are you doing here?

[HISS]

So that's it.

You've been transmutated
with a cat.

This should
hold you.

[YOWLS]

Get her something to eat.
It may calm her down.

Oh, I've got just
the thing, boss.

Hey, kitty,

look at what bebop
brought you for dindin.

Oww!

Aah!

SHREDDER: You fool!

She's still more
female than feline.

Hmm. She might not
eat a rodent,

but perhaps she'll
help me hunt one down.

Excuse me, did you
happen to see--

ALL: Shh!

Oh, wow! The t--

cool it.
We're top secret.

Yeah, like, you want
to blow our cover?

Oh, sorry. I guess
I got carried away.

Ok. So what happened
to April?

Well, first
she turned into a cat,

and then she drank milk
from a saucer,

and then she jumped out
the window

and then she went to
some man called shredder--

hey, whoa, whoa,
whoa, slow down.

Right. Could you,
like, rewind that

and play it back
at normal speed?

She said April went
to shredder's hideout.

That's all we need to know.

Did she happen to
tell you where it is?

No, but she did take some
pictures of the place.

Maybe they're still
at her apartment.

Her apartment?
Let's go!

Don't be frightened.
I am your friend.

No. [HISS]

You are enemy.

ROCKSTEADY: Here, kitty.
A brand-new collar.

How come
you're giving her

such pretty
presents, boss?

It's not a present,
you cretin.

The effects of
the molecular crossover

will only last
a short time,

but with that collar,

she will obey
my every command forever.

And I command you
to hunt down splinter.

Yesss, massster.

[YOWLS]

Which one is
April's apartment?

It's that one
up there.

[TIGER GROWLS]

And look what's
down here.

[SNARLING]

Uh, April,
is that you?

I guess not.

You guys start climbing.
I'll handle this.

Back, big fellow. Back!

Whoa!

That was great,
Michelangelo. Thanks.

Oh, nothing to it, bud.

Just remember, pizza's
the perfect payback.

Hi, fellas.
What took you so long?

Irma! How'd
you get in here?

I've got a key.

You mean we climbed that
fire escape for nothing?

It's ok.
We needed the workout.

I found
April's notes.

It says this guy
shredder's hideout

is an old warehouse
on the dock.

And here are some photos
she took of the place.

It's a molecular
transporter.

Then splinter
was right.

How totally weird.

Like, that's the same
cat in every photo.

That explains
everything.

April and the cat must've gotten
their molecules switched.

Which means that
somewhere out there

is a cat who's
trying to choose

just the right nail
Polish for its claws.

Turtles, we've got
to find April.

Finally, the lair
is as it should be,

but where are
those turtles?

[MEOW]

[GASPS]

[MEOW]

Go away! Out of here!

Cats--the one creature
I truly fear.

Yes, massster,
I hear you.

We must destroy sssplinter.

Oh, what delicious irony.

Soon they will find splinter
and tear him to shreds.

Well, shredder, you finally
did something right.

May I remind you, krang,

it was your transporter
that malfunctioned.

Oh? And now you'd like me
to send a repairman, right?

Maybe you'd like me to fix
your washing machine, too.

Just the instructions
will do.

All right,
but I warn you,

when I send
the technodrome,

there will be
no second chances.

Om...

I must rid my mind of
this dreaded fear of cats.

Om...

Aah!

My deepest nightmare
come to life.

[YOWLS]

April!
What's come over you?

[HISSING]

I must try to contact
the turtles.

Yoo-hoo! Here,
kitty, kitty, kitty.

Oh, there's a million cats
in this city

and we're supposed to find
one ordinary stray?

[MEOW]

Hi there, pussycat.
What's your name?

Is that really you, April?

[MEOW]

See? I told you
I was her favorite.

It's not you, man.

It's those anchovy
pizzas you eat.

[BEEP]
The turtlecom.

Quickly, turtles,
I need you.

[TIGER ROARS]

Master!
Come in, master!

Splinter
needs our help.

Splinter. Who's that?
He sounds cute.

Yeah. Cute enough to eat.

Back! Back, I say!

Shredder must be
behind this.

But how did
he find me?

[MEOW]
I led him here.

Master shredder sent us
to destroy you.

I will not fight you.

That will not ssstop me.

No. I do not know what
shredder has done to you,

but you are still my friend

and the turtles' friend.

Turtles?

Yes! You care deeply
for one another.

No! That was
in the passst.

Sssay farewell,
master splinter.

LEONARDO:
April, no! It's us!

The ninja turtles.

Ninja turtles...

My friends.

Right, and this is
our sensei, remember?

Yesss, also my friend.

No!

It's that collar!

It's controlling
her thoughts!

Mussst k*ll all of you!

Shredder commands it!
[YOWLS]

Holy cat! She's gone
totally nutsoid!

I'll take
care of this.

No, Leonardo, don't!
What are you doing?

Just this!

So much for shredder's
thought control.

Wh-what happened?

Let's just say for a while
there, you were catatonic.

[TIGER ROARS]

Uh-oh. We're not out
of the jungle yet.

And this one's
not wearing a collar.

Chill out, dudes.
This one's on me.

Got you.

[ROARS]

That ought to hold him until
we can notify the zoo.

Boy, Michelangelo,
you and your dumb toys.

Like I always say,

never look a gift
mouse in the mouth.

Ohh!
Ohh!

SHREDDER: Blast it!
My control over

April O'Neill's thought
waves has been terminated.

So, what do we do
with her lunch?

Ow! He did it again.

Don't sweat it.
I'll get the little nipper.

No, you idiot. Don't!

Uh-oh. I think
we broke it.

What do you mean we,
horn head?

Hurry, you cretins.
Out of here!

I'll get you turtles yet,
if it's the last thing I do!

Well, April, how's it feel
being a human again?

Awful. My nails are
absolutely ruined

from walking around
on all fours.

Yep. She's back to being
a woman, all right.

IRMA: Yoo-hoo! Splinter?
Are you in there?

Irma, what are you
doing in the sewers?

Well, a woman will go to any
depths to meet her dream man.

Now, where is
this hunky splinter guy?

I am splinter.

[GASPS] Oh!
You're a...You're a rat!

Precisely.
You must be Irma.

Wrong.
I must be going.

Aah!

[MEOW]

[LAUGHTER]