07x16 - The Legend of Koji

[bunniefuu]

♪ Teenage Mutant Ninja
Turtles ♪

♪ Teenage Mutant Ninja
Turtles ♪

♪ Teenage Mutant Ninja
Turtles ♪

♪ Heroes in a half-shell
Turtle power! ♪

♪ They're the world's
Most fearsome fighting team ♪

We're really hip.

♪ They're heroes
In the half-shell ♪

♪ And they're green ♪

Hey, get a grip.

♪ When the evil Shredder
Attacks ♪

♪ These Turtle boys
Don't cut him no slack ♪

♪ Teenage Mutant Ninja
Turtles ♪

♪ Teenage Mutant Ninja
Turtles ♪

♪ Splinter taught them to be
Ninja teens ♪

LEONARDO:
He's a radical rat.

♪ Leonardo leads
Donatello does machines ♪

That's a fact, Jack.

♪ Raphael is cool but crude ♪
Give me a break.

♪ Michelangelo
Is a party dude ♪

Party!

♪ Teenage Mutant Ninja
Turtles ♪

♪ Teenage Mutant Ninja
Turtles ♪

♪ Teenage Mutant Ninja
Turtles ♪

♪ Heroes in a half-shell ♪

♪ Turtle power! ♪

[♪♪♪]

Dishonorable wretches,

for your sordid
infamy,

you must be punished.

[LAUGHS]

Even your mighty sword

will prove ineffectual
against we 20.

[LAUGHS]

You are my enemy.

I disapprove of your actions.

[GRUNTS]

[ALL SCREAM]

[FISTS THUD]

[GROANS]

Truly we have been
reprimanded

for our contemptible misdeeds.

[♪♪♪]

[SIGHS]

Now, that's what I call
a movie.

[SIGHS]
Now, that's what I call
a cheapie.

Oh, come on.

Didn't you see
where he disarmed those 20 guys

with a single swipe
of his sword?

[GRUNTS]

Yeah, and some help
from the special-effects dudes.

Leonardo,
that's physically impossible.

Back then,
nothing was impossible.

In Ancient Japan,

a ninja lived by his wits
and his martial-arts skills.

[SIGHS]

Those were the days.

Hey, let's talk
to Master Splinter.

He's always got a story about
the history of the Foot Clan.

Good idea. I could use
a dose of nostalgia.

Master Splinter,
what's wrong?

[♪♪♪]

This isn't one of his
usual trances.

Sensei, snap out of it.

[GRUNTS, SCREAMS]

LEONARDO:
Master, are you okay?

I-- I felt a strange
sensation.

As if the voices of my ancestors
were reaching across

the vast sea of history

and crying out for help.

[♪♪♪]

Perfect.

This ruby is exactly

the temporal-focusing crystal
I need

for my time portal.

At last, I shall be able
to travel through time.

Now to destroy Splinter
and those accursed turtles

once and for all

by changing history.

We must make haste.

I sense that something
is terribly wrong.

Master, what do you want
our ninja cloaks for?

There is no time
to explain, Donatello.

We must hurry
to the Fine Arts Museum.

The Fine Arts Museum?

Guys, Master Splinter may have
finally stepped off the curb.

[♪♪♪]

I wish to see your master,
Oroku Sancho

You wear the helmet
of our master.

That is treason.

Ignorant fools.

[ALL SCREAM]

[♪♪♪]

Out of my way, cretins.

[ALL SCREAM]

[ALL SCREAM]

Uh, I-- I'll give you
whatever you want,

but please do not hurt me.

I am one of your
descendants.

Oroku Saki.

I have traveled here
from the future

to give you power and wealth
beyond your wildest dreams.

Wealth and power?

Mmm.

Very well.
Give them to me.

In the woods
near this castle

are two magical relics.

If you will allow me to command
your men, Oroku Sancho,

I will bring you
the artifacts,

making you the most powerful
warlord in Japan.

Oh, but why do you wish
to help me?

And why do you wear a copy
of my w*r helmet?

You wish to use my men

to gain this power
for yourself.

Ah, now that I know
of these items,

I don't need you.

[CACKLES]

I can find them
for myself.

You fool.

I'm an Oroku too.

I'm on your side.

Oh, please let me out.

I-- I'll give you anything.

It appears I'll have to
impersonate

my arrogant young ancestor.

I have captured the intruder

and locked him
in a secret chamber.

Rally your best men, general.

We're heading
for the forest.

[WHINNIES]

How much longer must I keep
wandering in these woods?

My sensei told me
that if I search this forest,

I would find what I need
to start my own ninja clan.

I wonder if he wasn't
fooling with me.

Hamato Koji,

your search is at an end.

Attack!

[SOLDIERS SHOUTING INDISTINCTLY]

DONATELLO:
I still don't understand
what we're doing here, master.

We have been led
to this place, Donatello,

by the same psychic call
I've felt before.

Yeah, are you sure they weren't
dialing a wrong number?

LEONARDO:
No. Look.

MICHELANGELO:
Whoa. Foot Soldier guard dudes.

Our old enemy Shredder
must be nearby.

[♪♪♪]

[EXCLAIMS]

He blowed up real good.

[FIRES g*n]

[GRUNTS]

All right!

Double-header.

RAPHAEL:
Now for old Shred-Head.

Uh, Shred-Head?

DONATELLO:
If I didn't know any better,

I'd say this was some kind
of time machine.

In an Egyptian temple?

[SCOFFS]

That makes a lot
of sense.

And it appears Shredder
has set the controls

to take him back
to the year 1583.

That is the year
that Hamato Koji

founded our Foot Clan.

And I suspect that Shredder
means to destroy him

before he can do it.

But Shredder's a member
of the Foot Clan too.

Why would he want to destroy
the guy who started it?

My human name
was Hamato Yoshi.

Hamato Koji
is my direct ancestor.

Then if Shredder destroys him,
you will never have been born.

And you four would forever
remain ordinary turtles.

Holy guacamole.

Wow. Wiped out
by a single rewrite of history.

We must go back in time
and stop him.

But first we must disguise
our unusual appearances.

Right. People were pretty
superstitious

back in those days.

LEONARDO:
Well, I said I could use

a dose of nostalgia.

RAPHAEL:
Ha! You're about to get it.

Big time.

You know, this isn't really
a fair fight.

RAPHAEL:
Oh, boy. Uh, did we show up
at a bad time?

SPLINTER:
Not necessarily.

That is Hamato Koji.

Who are you?

We're the cavalry, dude.

Maybe you'd better
explain it later.

[ALL GRUNTING]

LEONARDO:
All right!
We make a good little team.

RAPHAEL:
Yeah, but they make a good
big team.

You and your mysterious
friends

fight well,
Hamato Koji.

But now it is time for you
to meet your ancestors.

[♪♪♪]

[♪♪♪]

Now, Koji, you and your
mysterious friends

are finished.

[GRUNTS]

[HORSE WHINNIES]

[GRUNTS]

[INDISTINCT MURMURING]

MICHELANGELO:
Way to go, Koji!

Uh-oh.

LEONARDO:
There's too many of 'em.

Quickly, remove your cloaks.

[SOLDIERS GASP]

They are tengus. Demons.

[TURTLES LAUGHING]

SHREDDER:
The turtles? It can't be!

You fools! Come back!

No. To attack a tengu

would bring misfortune
on us all.

You wretched reptiles
may have followed me here,

but you'll never escape
from the past without this.

That must be the remote control
for the time machine.

We'll never catch up with him.

And we need that device.

All in good time.

First we must make sure

that Koji completes
his quest.

What manner of creatures
are you?

And how do you know
of my quest?

We are from the future.

Koji-sama, I am your descendant,
Hamato Yoshi.

Excuse me, but I don't see
the family resemblance.

DONATELLO:
Oh, well, you see,

we were all mutated...

Forgive me.

"Mutated"?

RAPHAEL [CHUCKLING]:
Donatello,

these people don't even have
electric toothbrushes.

How are you gonna
explain genetics?

[CLEARS THROAT]

Let me try.

Koji, we were put
under a magical spell.

Ah, I understand.

An evil sorcerer
turned you into a rat.

SPLINTER:
Uh, something like that, yes.

[♪♪♪]

SHREDDER:
So these cowardly samurai

think the turtles
are demons, huh?

I'll prove I'm more powerful
than any tengu

with my anti-gravity ray.

Blast!

One of those archers
must have hit it.

It'll take hours to repair.

But every minute
brings Koji closer

to those relics.

He must be stopped.

[CHUCKLES]

At least my sniveling ancestor
is out of the way.

[KNOCKING ON WALL]

SANCHO:
Let me out of here!

I am lord of this castle!

You can't do this to me!

[SIGHS]
I knew I should never

have trusted someone
who looks so much like me.

Hire the most ruthless
ninja assassins you can find.

Koji and his companions
must be destroyed.

KOJI:
My sensei told me

to seek out the shrine
of Shibano-Sama.

There, he said,
I would find what I need

to establish my own
ninja clan.

But surely a supreme ninja
such as Shibano-Sama

would not leave his shrine
out in the open.

We must use our wits to find it.

Well, what are we
waiting for, dudes?

Let's do some serious
searching.

[♪♪♪]

SPLINTER:
You know, Leonardo,

you might want to have
a talk with Koji.

What do you mean,
Master Splinter?

He is the founder
of our clan, after all.

He could give you much advice
about our fighting style.

I don't like
the looks of this.

I do.

They're beautiful.

May I help you
lovely ladies?

You are so gallant
and handsome.

What a pity you must perish!

[♪♪♪]

ALL:
Whoa!

[♪♪♪]

RAPHAEL:
All right, let's teach
these "ladies" a lesson.

You know, I don't think
we could have picked

a worse spot
for a sword fight.

[GRUNTS]

You must be destroyed!

[SCREAMS]

Go back. I can't hold
all this weight.

Save yourselves.
Get off the bridge.

I can't hold on...

[SCREAMS]

[♪♪♪]

Gotcha, dude.

WOMAN:
Honorable Koji,

even though we were sent
to destroy you,

you risked your life
to save us.

We renounce our mission.

We are no longer
your enemies.

SHREDDER:
There. It's fixed.

You are afraid
of the four turtles?

Yes. They are demons.
Tengus.

But behold, I am more powerful
than any demon.

[ALL GASP]

It is true.

He has the power
to control demons.

As long as I lead you,
you will be safe.

Now, I want every man
in this castle

to march out with me.

We must stop Koji!

Say, Koji,

uh, I was wondering if you could
help me with something.

After all the help
you've given me,

of course,
honorable turtle.

LEONARDO:
Well, I was watching
this movie--

I mean, I was reading
this story,

where this samurai
was surrounded.

And he chopped through
all the enemies' weapons

just by swinging his sword
in a circle.

Oh, that's easy.

It's all in the wrist.

Stand back.
I'll show you.

[♪♪♪]

MICHELANGELO:
Yo, buds,

we found a serious
shrine here.

According to the inscription,

this is the shrine
of someone

other than Shibano-Sama.

But still...

I am sorry to say I ran across
this shrine three days ago.

I searched every seam but could
find nothing unusual about it.

Well, looks like
we'll just have to

keep searching,
fellow dudes.

MAN: Your search is at an end.
[FOOTSTEPS RUMBLING]

I am Koro.

In battle, I am invincible.

[GRUNTS]

[ALL SCREAM]

Whoa. He can't do that to us.

[♪♪♪]

[ALL SHOUTING INDISTINCTLY]

On second thought,
maybe he can.

I fear this giant's strength
may be too much

even for the five of us.

No way, Koji.

Leonardo, you and Koji
start chopping down that tree.

Come on,
help me move that log.

[LOUD RUMBLING]

You little fools!

Why don't you fight?

Because we're busy
defeating you.

[LAUGHS]

The mighty Koro
can never be defeated.

Oh, sure you can.

Just step on the end
of that log.

Very well.

I'm not afraid of you.

DONATELLO:
Leonardo,

let him have it!

Whoa!

DONATELLO:
Boy, what a sucker.

I have been defeated.

I cannot bear the disgrace.

I will retire
to a peaceful life.

RAPHAEL:
Yeah, you do that.

Fellas, look.

Whoa. There was
a little shrine

hidden in that big shrine.

It is the shrine
of Shibano-Sama.

I don't believe it.

It is the Nojima blade.

What's that?
A legendary sword

that can cut through
anything.

What's this thing?

SPLINTER:
It is the Tsunami Box.

The Tsunami Box.

But it's said to contain

a power greater
than any tidal wave.

No, Koji-sama.

The Tsunami Box
must only be opened

when its power is needed.

Very well.

KOJI:
At last, I can start

my own ninja clan.

With these magical relics,

men will rally around me.

[SOLDIERS SHOUT,
SWORDS WITHDRAW]

Great. Start with them.

[♪♪♪]

[♪♪♪]

My enemies and the relics.
Perfect.

Attack!

[ALL SHOUTING]

[KOJI GRUNTING]

No!

Don't!

[♪♪♪]

MICHELANGELO:
Major drag, dudes.

[THUNDER CRASHES]

[ROARING]
RAPHAEL: Better make that,

"Major dragon."

Whoa. It's Godzilla's
great-granddad.

[ROARING]

There are villages
in that direction.

I must stop that creature.

SPLINTER:
I will come with you, Koji.

RAPHAEL:
Okay, so I guess

this means that we have to hold
these 400 samurai

at bay pretty much, huh?

Hey, somebody's gotta do it.

[ALL SHOUTING]

Destroy the turtles.

Destroy!

[♪♪♪]

[SANCHO GRUNTS]

At last I'm free.

That impostor
has stolen my armor.

This is intolerable!

I'll show him
who's the mightiest warlord.

I hope I can remember
how to use these things.

[DRAGON ROARING,
PEOPLE SCREAMING]

My ninja training
is only for fighting men,

not monsters.

Even this mystic blade

won't get that creature
back in this box.

Think, Koji.
What is the one thing

a fire-breathing monster
would fear?

Of course.

Water.

And there's
an underground spring

beneath the street.

[ROARING]

I will release you,
honorable dragon.

But you must obey me now.

[RUMBLING]

[ROARING]

Fellow dudes,

I think this is adios.

Not necessarily.

When I give the word,

everybody duck.

Whoa. Whoa. Whoa, Leonardo?

You're really not gonna try that
maneuver, are you?

That only works in the movies.

Duck!

[♪♪♪]

I don't believe it.

You did it.

It's all in the wrist.

RAPHAEL:
Great. Now just do it

about 50 more times
and we'll be home free.

[ALL SHOUTING]
[CHUCKLING]

You're finished, turtles.

SANCHO:
Stop!

This man is an impostor.
Take him away.

You idiot.

I'm trying to help you.

SANCHO:
Destroy the impostor.

Destroy them all!

Destroyed with the turtles?

It's too ignominious.

Hey, this isn't a big thrill
for us, either.

[DRAGON ROARING]

[♪♪♪]

Hi-ya!

Don't just stand there.

Save me! Save me!

Listen, all of you.

I am looking for men of valor
to join my new clan.

No longer will we serve
a cowardly,

dishonorable lord like you.

Only the one
who rides the dragon

is a worthy lord.

[ALL CHEERING]

Then join me, and I will teach
you the ninjutsu art

of the great Shibano-Sama
himself.

Together, we will be
a beacon of light

in these dark times.

Here in the footprint
of the dragon,

we form our new clan:

the Foot Clan.

My beautiful scheme!

You wrecked it!

[ALL SCREAM]

Forget it, Shredder.

You can't beat
the four of us.

Uh, perhaps not.

But I can leave you
stranded in the past.

The time control.
Where is it?

Uh, you mean this thing?

[BEEPS]

[ALL MUTTER INDISTINCTLY]

Please tell me
we're in the museum

and we didn't accidentally
go back


to Ancient Egypt.

Oh, we're in the museum,
all right.

What more can those
miserable turtles do to me?

RAPHAEL:
Oh, let's see. How about this?

No, no, no. No! No!

No!

Like, where's the Shredster?

He's gone.

LEONARDO:
Master,

I'm gonna miss Ancient Japan.

That was the greatest
experience of my life.

Those were indeed
noble times.

I'll say.

When the martial arts
were in full flower.

When the air rang
with the sound

of clashing swords.

Hey, they didn't have this
back then, dude.

Still, maybe it's better
to just live in the present.

[♪♪♪]