02x42 - Last Train to Oblivion

[bunniefuu]

[Ray Parker Jr's "Ghostbusters" playing]

♪ Ghostbusters ♪

♪ There's something strange
In the neighborhood ♪

[alarm blaring]

♪ Who you going to call? ♪

♪ Ghostbusters ♪

♪ There's something weird
And it don't look good ♪

♪ Who you going to call? ♪

♪ Ghostbusters ♪

[tires screeching]

♪ I ain't afraid of no ghost ♪

[ghosts roaring]

♪ I ain't afraid of no ghost ♪

[whirring]

♪ Who you going to call? ♪

♪ Ghostbusters ♪

♪ Who you going to call? ♪

♪ Ghostbusters ♪

[train horn blowing]

[male announcer] The Midnight Express

from Trenton, New Jersey and Port South,

now arriving on Plat 13.

All aboard!

[indistinct chattering]

[horn blaring]

[electricity crackles]

[growling]

[people screaming]

[continues growling]

[shrieks]

[yelling]

[people screaming]

[continues yelling]

[indistinct shouting]

[beeping]

[howling]

[toy train whistles]

Hey!

I've been working on this
all the livelong day.

Do you have any idea what time it is?

Isn't it great?

It's just like the real thing.
It even makes smoke.

[horn tooting]

[imitates train chugging]

Do you have to make those noises?

What noises?

[horn tooting]

Nevermind.

[imitates train chugging]

Get your own train, slime ball.

Yuck!

[speaking gibberish]

[imitates train chugging]

Next time, buy a ticket.

Hey! Ah!

Slimer!

[horn tooting]

[gulping] Mmm, yummy, yum, yum!

[belching]

Do the words "stomach pump"
mean anything to you?

[screams]

[speaking gibberish]

[growls]

[phone ringing]

Do you know what time it is?

Well, yeah, that's right.

But, what do you want, anyway?

Grand Central Station, huh?

Is this you, Egon?

Is what me?

Ghostbusters. Dr. Venkman speaking.

May I help you?

[siren wailing]

[yawns] Couldn't this wait till morning?

[continues yawning]

Pardon me, boys. Are you the Ghostbusters?

You got 'em, we bust 'em.

Well, good luck, sonny.

I've been working
on the railroad a long time.

I've never seen anything like tonight.

Was it a full torso manifestation
or an ectoplasmic energy display?

Uh, I don't know anything
about that stuff.

I got a feeling that whatever's in there

was a railroad man once.

I wouldn't be surprised

if it wasn't the ghost of
old Casey Jones himself.

[beeping rapidly]

What have you got, Egon?

He's here somewhere.

We'd better split up.

I was waiting for someone to say that.

Do you think that guard was right
about it being the ghost of Casey Jones?

I hope not.

One hundred years ago,

Casey Jones was the engineer
in the most famous wreck

in railroad history.

So?

Old habits are hard to break.

[gasps]

Hey, would you look at that?

Now, that's what I call a choo-choo.

Come on, Winston. Let's check it out.

[ghost humming]

What's he doing?

[Ray] He's humming off-key.

And it looks like
he's drinking a hot cup of coffee

and a cold glass of tea.

This ghost could be up for hours.

Let's get him.

[howling]

[door creaks]

Which way did he go?

[beeping]

I'm getting a strong reading.

End of the line.

What?

-[Egon sarcastically] Nice shot, Ray.
-[Ray]Thanks.

[levers cranking]

[imitates train whistle]

[imitates train chugging]

I hate it when he has fun.

Hey, a hat.

[coughing]

What do you think?

It's you.

[beeping rapidly]
He's here somewhere.

We're right on top of him.

I don't see anything.

[both] Huh?

Talk about traveling light.

[screams]

[exclaiming]

What do we do now?

I'd, uh, let out the sleeves.

I've always loved trains,
ever since I was a little boy.

I used to dream about
driving a big locomotive.

I studied engineering
in college for two years

before I found out
it didn't have anything to do with trains.

I feel like a real railroad man
in this hat.

[growling]

Help!

What the...Ah!

[Peter screaming]

Peter!

-[Peter] Wha...
-[ghost] [CACKLING]

[exclaiming]

Hey, wait!

[horn blowing]

Peter!

Oh, no!

What's happening?

The ghost...It's got Peter.

Why do you think the ghost grabbed Peter?

To get to the other side?

That's what I'm afraid of.

Come on, guys. We've got a train to catch.

[horn blaring]

Coal. More coal.

Sorry, guy. No can do.

I'm not in the union.

More coal, now!

Hey, fella, this is America.

I've got the right to
not work any time I want.

What if I just refuse, huh?

[horn blaring]

[coughing]

More coal!

Has this thing passed an emissions test?

We'll head 'em off at the overpass.

[horn continues blaring]

[Ray] We can jump down
when it goes under us.

By the way,

has it occurred to anybody
that this is amazingly stupid,

and unreasonably dangerous?

[all coughing]

[Ray] Now!

[all groaning]

I can't understand it.

We should have landed
right in the middle of the fifth car.

I think there were only four cars, Ray.

Have you considered solar energy?

More coal!

Hmm. An old fashioned guy.

It all looks the same.

That's the trouble with New Jersey.

Closer!

[engine roaring]

A little closer!

What do you say to a coffee break?

More coal!

That's what I thought you'd say.

We're gaining on them.

Can this car float?

Why?

That's why.

[all screaming]

[all exclaiming]

[Egon groans]

I think I lost a filling.

Where's this train going, anyway?

Oblivion.

Eternal rest.

Well, hey, I'm rested, relaxed, so...

How about you drop me off at Asbury Park?

[car engine roars]

[tires screeching]

[Ray] This is sure to work.

I'm surprised
we didn't think of this before.

Wait a minute, guys.

We need to rethink this.

[tires screeching]

You know, this isn't so bad
after the first four or five tons.

♪ You load sixteen tons
And what do you get? ♪

♪ Another day older
And deeper in debt ♪

I've got an idea.

You had that last idea.

Trust me.

[all screaming]

Can I parallel park or what?

♪ Listen to the jingle,
The rumble and the roar ♪

♪ As she glides along the woodland ♪

♪ Through the hills and by the shore ♪

♪ Hear the mighty rush of the engine ♪

-Look out!
-[growls]

[groans]

Get off!

[straining] Could we stop the train first?

[roaring]

[horn blaring]

[Ray] Whoa!

That's the most amazing thing
I've ever seen.

[Egon] What is it, Ray?

[horn blaring]

Forget it. You missed it.

I hope we don't go through
any more tunnels.

[Ray] Anybody got a flashlight?

[Winston] Stop shoving, Egon.

[Egon] I'm over here.

[Ghostbusters screaming]

[Winston] Ray.

Never, ever, ever do that again!

Phew!

The last one.

I ought to keep this as a souvenir.

More coal!

So, I'll buy a postcard...

[Winston] Don't move, Peter.

[gasps]

End of the line, fella.

Please. Please don't!

Come on, take it like a man.

Or...Whatever.

No! No, not yet!

Oh, no!

Can I move now?

How do trains look to you now, Peter?

I'm just glad this is all over.

[horn blows in the distance]

I knew I shouldn't have said that.

That's an Amtrak passenger train.

It's ahead of schedule.

Well, now,
this is really getting unbelievable.

Time to throw this thing into reverse.

[straining]

Just isn't your night, is it?

We can jump.

Hey, I can't.

Put it to a vote?

Jumping won't save the people
on the other train.

Yeah, or me either.

You're right, Winston.
I hadn't thought of that.

Glad somebody did.

We don't jump. What do we do?

I'm open to suggestions.

[horns blaring]

I guess maybe
it was the ghost of Casey Jones.

That's it.

Peter!

[all] Whoa!

[metal clanks]

[horns blaring]

[engine hissing]

All right! I'm free!

How did you know the ghost would
switch us on to the siding?

Just a brilliant flash of insight.

Everyone knows that
some ghosts spend eternity

trying to correct mistakes
they made in life.

Well, Casey Jones was an engineer.

He died in a train wreck.

So I figured, his ghost wouldn't rest
until he'd set things right.

By preventing a train wreck,

he wanted to save someone's life,
not take it.

Cause and effect, Ray. Psychology.

-Lucky guess?
-You know it.

Look, it's Casey Jones.

[Peter] There he goes.

Have a good one, Casey.

You did fine.

Real fine.

[theme music playing]
[crowd cheering]

[yelling]