04x12 - Robodie II/For Butter or Worse/Annoying Things

[bunniefuu]

Narrator: Ladies and Gentlemen, Garfield and Friends! ♪

- We're - We're

- ready - ready

- to - to

- party!

♪ We're ready to party, we're ready ♪

♪ I hope you bring lots of spaghetti ♪

- [Wade] I'm scared!

♪ Come on in, come to the place where fun never ends ♪

♪ Come on in, it's fun to party with Garfield and Friends ♪

- Dancing! - Fiesta!

- Romancing! - Siesta!

- Samba! - La bamba!

- Ay caramba!

- Disguises. - Disguises!

- Surprises. - Surprises!

- And pies of - And pies of

- all sizes!

♪ Come on in, come to the place where fun never ends ♪

♪ Come on in, it's time to party with Garfield and Friends ♪

♪ Come on in, it's time to party with Garfield and Friends ♪

♪ Garfield and Friends

- [Garfield] And just remember what you paid to get in.

[trumpet sound]

[upbeat theme music]

♪

[barking]

- Want me to throw the stick again boy?

- [Odie] Yeah, yeah! [barking]

- [Garfield] Another heavy- weight intellectual activity.

[stick flies] [barking]

[clatters and splatters]

This is a felony in some states.

[panting]

[dramatic music] - Hmm?

Ah there he is.

The doggy I need for my experiment.

Don't be scared little doggy. [Odie whines]

I merely need to borrow you for a second.

[Odie whines]

I won't harm you puppy. [static]

- [Garfield] We interrupt this cartoon for a footnote.

If that man with the Three Stooges haircut

looks familiar to ya, there may be a reason.

He was on the show about two years ago.

We've re-run that one about ninety-eight times by now.

Let's see "Box of Fun", "Garfield goes Hawaiian"...

ah here we go "Robodie".

One of my favorite episodes.

What was that guy's name again?

[playful music] [electronic beeping]

[tape clatters]

[static]

- Oh do not fear little poochie,

I am Dr. Bean.

Doctor Garbanzo Bean!

I do mad scientific work,

and a one-hour film... [Dr. Bean mumbles]

- [Garfield] Dr. Bean that's it.

He built all those robot duplicates of Odie.

[robotic barking]

This is a sequel.

Same title, same guest star, and probably

most of the same jokes.

We now rejoin our cartoon where we left off. Thank you.

[static]

[playful music] [Odie whines]

- I won't harm you puppy.

[playful rock music]

- Odie?

Odie?

Maybe he's lost?

- [Garfield] Nah we don't have that kind of luck.

Let's go look for him in a good Italian restaurant.

- Here's the stick I threw.

- [Garfield] Uh oh, it's not like Odie

to give up on a stick.

He has a head for wood.

And vice versa.

- C'mon we've gotta search.

[playful rock music]

[electronic beeping]

[Odie whining] - I am not giving up

on my dream to perfect the robot dog!

They said the Wright brothers were nutty,

they said Thomas Edison was nutty,

they said Phillip W. Wonderburger was nutty.

- [Otis] Huh? - He was my uncle.

He was nutty.

But I am not!

I am a great inventor.

I invented the telephone.

Okay so I did it in 1987,

how was I to know somebody had beaten me to it?

Once I unveil my robot dog,

the world will never laugh at me again.

[Odie whines]

[trumpets play]

[zapping]

[whimpering]

The computer is assimilating the data.

Any minute now.

[trumpets playing] [gears whirring]

[electronic barking]

It worked, it worked!

The robot dog!

[playful music]

I will test it out.

[evil laughing] [robotic barking]

- What a cute little doggy.

Yow! Ow!

Hey dog you get back here!

[mischevious music]

[pants ripping]

[robot voice]: Bow wow. Bow wow.

- [Store Clerk] Hey dog don't touch that.

[register chimes]

- My robot dog still has a few bugs.

[register chimes]

Or fleas in it.

[playful rock music]

[Odie grunts and struggles]

[machine whirs]

[Odie gasps]

[machine grinding]

[loud expl*si*n]

[Odie gasps]

[Odie whines]

[loud electronic barking]

- [Citizen] There's the dog the police wanted so bad.

[playful rock music]

[angry chatter]

[thud]

- [Odie] Whew.

[citizens angry chatter]

[skidding stop] [Odie gasps]

[citizens angry chatter]

[Odie barks]

[loud splash] [Odie gasps and whines]

- Okay dog it's over.

We're gonna put you away where you'll

never cause trouble again!

[Odie whimpers]

[electronic barking] [loud thuds]

[booming voice] Bow wow.

[suspenseful music]

- [Garfield] You know, it would be simpler

just to buy another dog.

- Garfield did you hear someone yelling this way?

[booming voice] Bow wow.

[Jon stutters] I-I-I-I uh...

- [Garfield] You could say that again.

[slurping] [rock music]

- Help,help!

[thud]

[Odie barking]

Odie! Who, or what is that?

- Oh my goodness, that's the second biggest

robot dog I've ever seen!

- Dr. Bean?

- Dr. Garbanzo Bean in person.

In the flesh.

I think I miscalculated again.

Come back to my lab where I will offer

profound apologies for all of this.

[playful music]

There I've dismantled them all.

I will never build another robot dog again.

I promise.

I especially am sorry to you little doggy.

I got you in a heap of trouble.

Do you forgive me?

[slurping]

- [Jon] Hey Dr. Bean what's this?

- Oh that's my newest invention of which I'm so proud.

The robot cat.

Here give it a try.

[zapping]

- It just lays there and doesn't do anything.

[Dr. Bean laughs]

- It worked!

It does everything a real cat does.

- [Garfield] Don't get too attached to Dr. Bean kids,

this is his last time on the show.

[jazzy piano music]

[chewing]

[Odie barks] [splatter]

[playful music] [panting]

[skidding stop] [ripping]

[jazzy piano music]

- I didn't see it, I don't know anything about it.

[rustling]

[theme song instrumentals]

[playful music]

- Hey what are you cooking Bo?

- Cajun food man.

Did you ever make like blackened eggplant?

- No everything I cook comes out blackened.

Including the angle food cake.

[Wade chuckles]

- Boy you're gonna need a pound of butter.

- Well at least we've got plenty of that.

We've been churning a supply of butter for weeks!

It's empty!

- How can that be?

This is not the Garfield cartoon ya know.

- That refrigerator was full of butter last week.

- Someone stole all our butter man.

- I know who did it!

It was--

- Wait! Let's not be too hasty to accuse anyone.

Why do you think Roy did it?

- I'll go talk to him.

You guys start churning some more.

[whimsical music]

- [Roy] Whoo hoo! Oh we love our butter.

I can butter a roll.

I can butter my toast.

I can butter my beans!

Oh I love it!

[knocking] [Roy gasps]

Oh no! Someone wants to take

all my beautiful butter away from me.

[mysterious music]

Just a second.

Come in.

- Hi Roy I was wondering--

- No butter. I am completely out of butter.

Oh if only I had some butter.

- Gee Roy you've put on a few pounds.

You wouldn't happen to have some butter in there?

- You wouldn't happen to have an entire

dairy in there pig-o?

- Fair comment.

Okay Roy I'll go look somewhere

else for the stolen butter.

- The thought that honest I would steal butter.

How absurd!

[Roy excitedly yells] Butter, butter, butter, butter

how do I love the?

Let me count the pats. [evil laughing]

[squishing]

- Ah, how much more butter do we have to churn Orson?

- Fifty or sixty more pounds.

I'm gonna go grab a quick nap

and then I'll churn some more.

[squishing] [melancholy music]

- What an exciting cartoon huh?

- I know Roy has that butter,

but it would take a superhero to prove it.

[yawns] [mysterious music]

[harp strumming]

- [Announcer] Faster than a speeding custard,

[splatter]

More powerful than a garlic pizza.

[burping]

Able to leap tall sandwiches in a single bound.

[rocket jets]

- Look up there in the sky.

- It's a bird.

- No it's a plane.

- No it's a bird.

- No it's a raccoon, I'm sure it is a raccoon.

- No it's a jumbo jet.

[all angrily chattering]

- [Announcer] No you're all wrong.

It's a pig.

A pig! Ya got that?

- [All] A pig?

[rocket jets]

- [Announcer] Yes, it's Power Pig.

Strange visitor from another waller,

and who disguised as Orson pig,

mild mannered Saturday morning cartoon star,

fights a never-ending battle for truth,

justice and some other important stuff.

[heroic music]

[alarm ringing] - [Bo] Help!

Like help someone!

I've been robbed man.

Like where is Power Pig-o?

- This looks like a job for...

The police.

I'll go get lunch.

No on second thought this is a job for Power Pig.

I'll find a phone booth and change.

I will change in there.

- Hey Power Pig,

somebody just stole all my top grade butter.

- They stole your better butter big Bo?

- Well just the bitter variety man.

- Zounds! Someone has stolen big Bo's better bitter butter.

- People use it to make batter for biscuits.

- Big Bo's better bitter butter for better biscuit batter?

- Any ideas who could of done it?

- Hmm, my mind mulls many malicious malfeasants.

Mayhaps mean and menacing margarine men burgled

big Bo's better bitter butter for better biscuit batter!

[clapping]

Don't worry big Bo.

I'll get the burgled better bitter butter back.

[swishing]

Uh correction.

First I'll fix your sign,

then I'll get the burgled better whatever back.

- I've done it lowly assistant.

I now have all the butter in the city.

[evil laugh] - Why did you want it

Margarine Man?

- Because now people have no choice

but to use the imitation stuff--margarine!

And I control the margarine market.

I'll be rich!

Now I shall get rid of all the butter by melting it.

[evil laugh]

[mysterious music] [heat ray humming]

Any minute now the butter will be all gone.

[hero entrance music]

- Uh oh that sounds like hero entrance music.

[loud crash]

- You burgled big Bo's better bitter butter

for better biscuit batter.

- You're too late Power Pig.

You have good diction but you're too late.

The butter's all melted.

- I have to do something.

All the butter I have to find something to put it on.

That corn field. That's it!

I'll use my heat ray vision to pop all the corn.

[popping] [splattering]

[trumpets] It worked!

Fifty acres of hot buttered popcorn.

I can distribute it to every movie theater in town.

Everyone loves hot buttered popcorn.

But first, I need to find a salt mine to shake over all this.

Hmm...

That's how I prove that Roy has the butter!

Stop churning, popcorn is the answer to all our problems.

- Popcorn? How bout some pretzels?

- No Wade, popcorn!

Leave it to me.

[playful music]

- Hmm, I am getting perilously low on butter.

I hope Orson churns some more so I can...

[clears throat] borrow it.

[knocking on door]

Be right with you!

- Hi Roy just came by to bring you a bag of popcorn.

- Popcorn! How inexpensive.

But appreciated.

[crunching]

There's no butter on this popcorn.

- Oh no, there's no butter anywhere on the farm.

And it's too bad too, cause I know

some folks can't eat popcorn without

golden delicious butter.

Smooth creamy butter flowing over every kernel,

adding to that high calorie bad for your health taste.

Too bad there's no butter around

here to put on your popcorn Roy.

[anxious music] [Roy mutters]

- Butter, I must have b-b-b-butter!

Butter!

I must have butter on my popcorn!

- So that's where you hid it.

Roy you thief!

- Please Orson forgive this butter brained rooster.

Please?

- Well, if you replace all the butter you took--

- How can I churn that much butter?

- I have an idea.

And it'll help you loose those extra

butter belly pounds. [playful music]

[Roy panting] - Orson--

how much so far?

- So far you've lost five pounds of tummy,

and we've got fifty pounds of butter.

- Like how do I do it man?

- Well not bad, only six-hundred more miles to go.

- Better stop him before we have cottage cheese.

[playful music]

[theme music instrumentals]

[horn honks]

- [Garfield] I'm late.

I have to get to the TV studio.

I have to get to the TV studio.

I have to be anywhere else.

I have to be anywhere else.

- [Dog] I want you to know,

that I hate cats with big mouths.

- [Garfield] You do?

- [Dog] I do.

And every time you do one of those TV shows,

you say bad things about dogs.

- [Garfield] Me say bad things about dogs?

Whew no that's my evil twin doing that.

We've got to stop him-- - [Dog] Listen cat,

read my lips.

- [Garfield] I can't.

They're like mine they don't move.

- [Dog] One unkind comment about dogs

and you'll be in that book of world records

under pain.

- [Garfield] Yes sir.

Thank you man's best friend.

Not one bad word about dogs.

Not even a bad syllable.

- [Dog] And cat...

[yelling] I'll be watching!

- [Announcer] And now here's the host

of Annoying Things, Garfield Cat!

And now here's the host of Annoying Things,

Garfield Cat!

Where's that stupid cat?

[applause] [crashing]

- [Garfield] Annoying thing number one,

slippery stage floors.

Welcome to Annoying Things.

The show that shows you every thing that annoys you.

A little later we'll be doing that by showing

you ninety-nine solid minutes of commercials.

[laugher] But before we get to that,

let's look at some other things that annoy us all.

For instance, annoying thing number two is...

Annoying thing number two is people on TV

who forget their script, 'scuse me.

Let's see what we have today.

Poodles, c*ck Spaniels, Doberman Pinchers,

Mutts, Boxer dogs, Pit Bulls, Dachshunds...

Ah this could be a very dangerous show.

[clears troat] Here are some annoying things

that have nothing to do with dogs.

[clears troat] Annoying thing number three,

anchovies on pizza.

Putting anchovies on pizza is either

a felony or it should be.

Annoying thing number four.

Door to door alligator salesmen.

We have quite all the alligators we need thank you.

Annoying thing number five.

People who make you watch home movies of their goldfish.

This must come to a screeching halt.

Annoying thing number six.

[circus music] Nermal, need I say more?

Annoying thing number seven.

That kid who reminds the teacher

that she forgot to assign homework.

[loud clatter] [punching]

Annoying thing number eight is those little

cards that fall out of magazines.

I really hate those little cards

that fall out of magazines.

[playful music] Your magazine comes

in the mail, you open it and out falls those little cards.

And most of em' comes in your subscription

copy asking you to subscribe.

Annoying things number nine through twelve

are things that people say that they shouldn't.

Annoying thing number nine.

- So what's your sign?

- [Garfield] Annoying thing number ten.

- Mind if I share an experience with you?

- [Garfield] Annoying thing number eleven.

- I really need to know where my head is at.

- [Garfield] Try looking above your shoulders

on that little neck-like thing.

Annoying thing number twelve.

- Let's savor the moment. [splatter]

[gong chimes]

- [Garfield] Annoying thing number thirteen.

People who carry around pictures of their power tools.

Annoying thing number fourteen.

People who leave their Christmas

decorations up until July.

Annoying thing number fifteen.

People who put them up in August.

Annoying thing number sixteen.

Nermal again.

Annoying thing number seventeen.

Doggie tongue. Very dangerous. [slurping]

Annoying thing number eighteen.

The instruction man-- [knocking]

Excuse me, we'll make number eighteen

being interrupted in the middle of your show.

[cautious music]

You pounded?

[dramatic music] - [Dog] Yeah I pounded.

And that door ain't all I'm gonna pound

if you make any more cracks about dogs!

- [Garfield] Right. [whimsical music]

I am very sorry I promise you it will not happen again.

[haunting music]

That dog is going to make kitty litter out of me.

I gotta make sure I don't mention dogs again.

Okay cats back what number was I up to?

- [Audience] Nineteen!

- [Garfield] Right.

Annoying thing number nineteen is those instruction

manuals that come with things that have to be assembled.

[playful music] - Okay, locate main housing A

and insert sub assembly B.

Now holding flange unit C parallel

a fix with locking parts B, E, and F.

Then invert assembly and slide rolling

cleats G and H and tighten with crescent wrench.

Remove outer support structure seven,

and dis guard while tightening locking wheel. Ah.

- [Garfield] Six hours later.

- Sand unit with fine grain sand paper,

then gently tap sub structural wing 9-K

with a borrowed ball-peen hammer

and your assembly is complete. [sighs]

Great. Let's see what it looks like Garfield.

Garfield! I'm impressed!

That is an incredible life sized replica of Elvis Presley.

- [Garfield] Yeah but it was supposed to be a skateboard.

Annoying thing number twenty is the most annoying of all.

It's dogs.

Dogs stink, they're stupid, they're useless,

they're...they're...Hey!

Who put that on my cue card?

- [Nerman] Nerman.

- [Garfield] I didn't mean it.

I didn't mean what I said about dogs.

Dogs are nice, dogs are noble, dogs are good.

Dogs are here.

Dogs are here, and I am leaving.

- [Dog] Cat you're history.

- [Garfield] You don't want to do anything

to me in front of millions of people?

- [Dog] I--millions of people?

- [Garfield] We're on TV now rover.

Haven't you ever been on TV before?

- [Dog] TV? Why no.

- [Garfield] Really?

A talented guy like you?

- [Dog] Awe, I'm not talented.

- [Garfield] You're being modest.

I'll bet you're quite the little dancer.

[dog chuckles] - [Dog] Well I--

I do know a few steps. [circus music]

- [Garfield] Isn't that great folks?

- [Dog] My momma always thought

I should be on the stage.

- [Garfield] You should, but not my stage now.

If you just-- - [Dog] Hey watch this one!

[feet pattering] [faint clapping]

- [Garfield] Wonderful.

Now we have to get on with the show.

- [Dog] Hey cat I'm not letting

you get in the way of my big break here.

- [Garfield] Hey don't--stop!

Don't do that. Help!

Look out! [crashing]

- [Dog] Forgive the intrusion ladies and gentleman.

Could I have my hat and cane?

[circus music] [feet pattering]

[cheers and applause]

- [Garfield] Annoying thing number twenty-one.

Guys who don't know when to get off camera.

Goodnight.

[upbeat theme song]

♪