Heightened (2023)

[bunniefuu]

- What?

- That's a nice way to answer the phone.

Hello, Mother. What do you want?

You haven't RSVPed

to the Peterson wedding.

- What?

- Alice just called me.

Said she couldn't find

your response anywhere.

It's this weekend, Eleanor.

- Well, obviously, I can't go.

- Why not?

You've known Jill

since you were two.

And I haven't spoken

to her since I was ten.

Well, ignoring

her invitation is rude,

and reflects rather poorly

on your father

and me, don't you think?

Sorry I made you look

bad, but can you think

of any reason other than Jillian

Peterson being a huge b*tch,

- that I can't go?

- Eleanor.

Christ, Mom.

I have the Bar Exam.

I hate it

when you talk like that.

We're so happy

you're home, dear.

We were so worried about you,

weren't we?

So worried.

Can I get anyone a drink?

-Eleanor shouldn't be drinking.

-Oh, right.

But I'll have a G&T.

So the wedding was lovely.

The Peterson wedding.

Jillian looked beautiful.

Though, her hair is short now,

and she wore it down,

which I found a little gauche,

and my chicken

was a little tough,

but you can't have it all.

Thank you, dear.

What do you think?

About what?

Is it just my generation

that thinks you should have

your hair done

for your own wedding?

Are you serious?

Uh, your mother is just trying

to have a conversation, Nora.

Yes, but forget about me.

What would you like

to talk about, Eleanor?

She'll be okay.

How am I getting there?

Good morning to you, too.

I don't have a car.

So I suppose

I'll have to drive you.

Hello everyone, my name is Jim.

Let's go around the circle,

and introduce ourselves.

We'll start with you.

My name's Bill,

I'm an alcoholic.

Ah, Bill,

this is "Learning to Connect."

AA is two doors down

on the left.

Anyone else?

Okay.

We'll get there eventually.

You're all here

because you have

something in common.

You have trouble

connecting with others.

This is a safe space.

In here we open up, connect,

and learn to take that

to the outside world.

I don't really need to be here.

My parents made me.

Your parents?

And a judge.

Well, why do you think

your "parents" feel

it's necessary?

They were concerned

about my behavior.

And you're not?

Concerned?

My behavior is fine.

You don't think pulling

that alarm indicated otherwise?

I needed to leave.

So you're just going

to pull an alarm

every time

you feel uncomfortable.

Why not?

Maybe then I'll go to jail,

and I won't have to see

my mother anymore.

You were very lucky

to have escaped

more serious consequences,

Eleanor.

It's Nora.

I don't like

being called Eleanor.

-Noted.

-And no, I'm not lucky.

I have rich parents.

The judge was an old

law school buddy of my dad's.

It's a lot of things,

but it's certainly not luck.

Well, Nora, lucky or not,

I suggest you

take your time here seriously.

So, Eleanor,

are you going to be seeing

any of your old friends

while you're home?

What friends?

You know, your old

high school girlfriends.

Can you name a single one

of my high school girlfriends?

We've found that volunteer work

is the best way

to re-integrate yourselves

as functional members

of society.

So if you have any preferences,

speak right up.

- I'll do animals.

- Animals.

- Pediatric ward.

- Okay.

- Old people.

- Old People.

- Homeless outreach.

- Soup Kitchen.

And that leaves Eleanor.

-Do you have a preference?

-It's Nora.

Nora, do you have a preference?

Oh.

I don't really do...

nature.

Can I help you?

Hi. I'm, um...

Sorry, it's just--

it's embarrassing.

Why I'm here, I mean.

You haven't gotten

to that part yet.

Right, um, so,

I'm in this program.

-Yeah?

-And, um...

I'm just enjoying

watching you squirm.

-You must be Eleanor.

-It's Nora.

Jim called ahead about you.

We've had great success with

some people from the program.

You all make

fantastic little workers.

You'll be shadowing Dustin,

a member of our team.

He'll be responsible

for your day-to-day.

We just ask that you sign in

and out on the forms over there,

so that we can send the hours

off to the cuckoo's nest,

let 'em know

you're behaving yourself.

Okay.

Where do I find this Dustin?

Take a left out that front door,

follow the path

straight down to the beach.

He spends his morning prowling

on the rocks down there.

Okay.

Oh, Eleanor.

I'll be watching you.

Hi.

-Hi.

-Hi.

I'm Nora,

I'm looking for Dustin.

He's supposed to be

my project manager, supervisor--

Call me Dusty.

-You're Dustin?

-Dusty.

Dusty's not a name.

It is. It's my name.

Yeah, um, I think

it's more like an adjective.

-An adjective?

-A descriptor.

Yeah, I know--

I know what an adjective is.

Of course you do.

Right, well, Nora,

you'll be working with me

for the next few weeks.

Mostly trail maintenance

and the like.

Do you have a change of clothes?

We'll see what we can do.

You're getting sunburned.

Let's take a break.

Want some?

No. Thank you.

You don't like 'em?

Not really.

What? Why? They're so cheesy

and perfect and delicious.

Well, I've never

actually had them.

You have to try some right now.

-I can't.

-Why? You on a diet?

Not that you need to be.

Your body is fine.

Not like, "fine." Just fine.

It's better than fine.

It's good.

It's--it's good.

It's great. That was weird.

Yeah, I don't eat orange foods.

Huh? Why?

It's not natural.

The color is

named after a fruit.

I think the fruit was

named after the color, but...

I don't eat fruit either.

It's dirty.

Is that why

you're in that program?

Kind of.

What else is wrong with you?

To land you there?

It's so dirty there.

Did that give you anxiety, Nora?

When anxious,

it can be helpful to name things

that you're experiencing

with your five senses.

For example, could you smell

the salt of the sea?

Yes,

and it smelled like as*h*le.

Feel the sun on your face?

I forgot to put sunscreen on

the other day,

and I think this freckle

on my nose is new.

How did the waves sound?

I've only had it for a day

and it's already changing shape.

That's melanoma 101.

Your program gave me cancer.

If we're gonna

let you use the clippers,

then we need to go over

some safety protocol.

If you want to use the clippers,

then you need to reach out

your hands like so,

and say in a loud, clear voice,

"Clippers, please."

Nora? Are you watching?

Ah.

Let's, uh--let's take a break.

You don't wanna be a cop,

do you?

What?

No.

Then why are you reading that?

Oh, you, uh--you got

a little something there.

Nora, get off the rock!

What? Why?

I said get off the rock!

-What was that?

-What?

On the rocks? I saw a can.

I was gonna get the can.

I can't jeopardize your safety.

My safety wasn't jeopardized.

It wasn't exactly a cliff.

I'm responsible for you, Nora.

I can't have you falling

into the water--

Hey, Dustin, go long!

- How's it going, Eleanor?

- It's Nora.

Some kid vomited

all over the picnic tables.

You know what to do.

Yeah, I know what to do.

Eleanor!

You are tracking mud

all over the house.

Hello, Mother.

Clean it up.

It's just--

it's everywhere.

You clean off

before you come in.

Oh, darling,

I'm getting my car detailed

in the morning,

and I've got golf.

Can you drop me off

for my tee time?

Of course, dear.

-I need a ride to the Park.

-Oh.

Well, I can bring you

into your program

after I drop your father off

at the club.

Thanks.

But you'll need

to get a ride home.

From who?

I'm sure there's

plenty of nice people

who could take you.

It's true, my little cousin,

he's seven years old

and he writes better than that.

He's got hearts

over the I's, or he wants to.

It's like a--like a girl.

Here he is!

The man of the hour!

You really made

our morning, D-man.

Happy to be of service.

We were just

reading your incident report

of those punks down

by the lighthouse yesterday.

Now, tell me, Dustin.

How do you spell "vandalized"?

Did I do something wrong?

I wrote that.

-What?

-What?

Yeah, uh, Dusty had me

write it up yesterday.

The spelling mistakes

must be mine.

I will redo this

and get it back to you

this afternoon.

Right.

Nora, let's, uh, go make sure

all that spray paint

is cleaned off the lighthouse.

Why did you do that?

Do what?

Cover for me?

It was just a mistake.

Mitch didn't need to be

such a d*ck about it.

It wasn't a mistake.

I really thought that vandalized

was spelled with an "S."

So you're not a great speller.

I didn't think spelling

was a requirement

to be a good Park Ranger.

Good?

Well,

after a fresh coat of paint,

those vandals, with a "Z,"

will be no match for us!

Well, vandals is, uh--

Never mind.

sh*t.

-What can I do for you, Officer?

-Where might you be going?

And why is that

any of your business?

It's my business because you're

endangering yourself and others.

By walking?

By walking with

the flow of traffic

on a road without sidewalks.

Come on, you can't

give me a ticket for walking.

-Afternoon, Officer.

-Afternoon, Dusty.

I was just stopping

to give Nora here a ride.

-You know this young lady?

-I do. We work together.

Well, then, you can let her know

the safe way to walk

here in the country is

against the flow of traffic.

Yes.

I was already planning on it.

Get in.

How do you know her?

Small town. What were you doing?

Walking home.

Why?

Apparently my mom had

something more important to do.

She's right, you know.

About it being dangerous.

You think

everything's dangerous.

That's because most things are.

You hungry?

Do they have anything

other than lobster?

It's the Lobster Shack. So, no.

So, I've never

actually had lobster.

You lived almost

your entire life in Maine

and you never had lobster?

-Is it the orange thing?

-No.

More like the giant bug thing.

You get us a table,

I'll take care of the food.

I don't think I can do this.

Mmm, of course you can.

We'll start with the claw.

It's the best part.

-Uh, no, I really can't--

-I have an idea.

-Close your eyes.

-What?

Open up!

-Eleanor?

-Jillian!

-Hi!

-It's so good to see you!

Yeah. Uh, con--congratulations.

-Sorry I missed your--

-Thanks. It was so perfect.

- Wow.

- Yeah.

-Who's your friend?

-No one.

I mean, of course he's someone.

Um, he's just not my friend.

He's my coworker!

Not that I work at the park.

Um, it's more like

a volunteering thing.

I'm very immersed

in charity these days.

Oh, that's wonderful!

When I lived in India

after college,

teaching yoga to

underprivileged locals,

I really learned

the importance of charity

as part of one's dharma.

You taught yoga

to Indian people?

I continue my service here

teaching yoga on weekends.

Oh, you should come

to class sometime!

Well, I'll leave you two to it.

Say hi to your parents for me!

I can't eat that.

It's more for me.

Wow. You grew up here?

Yeah.

I'm pretty surprised

your parents only have one car.

They don't.

My dad's is in the shop.

Ah.

It's hard relying on them

to get around.

I rank somewhere after golf

and grocery shopping

in importance.

Well, I'd be happy to give you

a ride anywhere you need.

Thanks, but I'll manage.

I can't exactly ask you

to drop me off at therapy

every other day.

Well, you could.

If you needed to.

Um, you should probably

get out of here

before my mother

tries to talk to you.

Eleanor! Who's your friend?

He's not my friend.

Dustin McCarthy, ma'am.

Pleased to make

your acquaintance.

-You have a beautiful home.

-Thank you!

Eleanor, why have you

never mentioned him?

He's adorable!

-Thanks for the ride.

-No problem.

Lovely to meet you,

Mrs. St. Clair.

Likewise.

-Handsome man.

-Yeah?

Pity about his situation though.

-What situation?

-Oh, you know.

The dirt,

the truck, and whatnot.

My day was fine, thanks.

I've been home for weeks,

and they haven't even

acknowledged why.

They're acting like I'm on

some sort of extended vacation.

Well, what do they do when you

tell them about your day?

I don't. They don't ask.

I'm sorry.

I'm used to it.

It's just lonely.

I get that.

I mean, the lonely part.

I don't have, like,

that many friends or anything.

Yeah, I don't either.

Not even in Boston.

We could be friends.

If you want.

Well, we already spend, like,

most our time together anyway.

That was stupid, sorry.

People don't just ask

other people to be friends--

That would be nice.

Oh!

Great.

You're getting sunburned again.

I really don't need

to be here anymore.

I think

that's a little premature.

-But I slept last night!

-That's great, Nora.

I am truly happy

about the strides you're making,

but one night of sleep

isn't enough to discharge you.

-Fine.

-So, let's focus

on some more coping mechanisms.

But I'm not even

having anxiety anymore.

Okay, coping mechanisms

for hypothetical future anxiety.

And you say

I have to be less negative.

What is an example

of a situation

that may give you anxiety?

What about your relationship

with your parents?

-Is that improving?

-That's a lost cause.

Nothing is a lost cause.

Okay, if I'm being honest,

my Mom still

makes me feel like sh*t.

Why would that work?

When your exhalation

is longer than your inhalation,

your brain is signaled

to turn down

the sympathetic nervous system,

aka fight or flight,

and turn up the parasympathetic

nervous system,

aka rest and relaxation.

Try it.

Good!

I'd also recommend

incorporating meditation

and yoga into your routine.

The many different

breathing techniques

coupled with movement

can do wonders for your mood.

Yeah, I don't love to sweat.

But I will try the meditation.

Eleanor! Dinner.

I'm meditating.

What?

I'm meditating!

You're what?

I'm f*cking meditating!

What's left?

Should we check the rocks?

I, uh, checked them

before you got here.

-They're clear.

-Oh, thank God.

-What do they call it?

-What?

What you have.

A lot of things.

-Anxiety, misophonia, OCD.

-Miso-what?

Misophonia.

It's when you can't stand

certain noises.

Like you, chewing cheese puffs

extremely loudly

and disgustingly.

What about the thing

where everything

starts closing in,

and then you can't do anything?

-How do you know I have that?

-I've seen it.

When you had

the caterpillar on your arm.

That's just

a panic attack, anxiety.

Is it common?

Yeah, a lot of people have it.

Not just crazy people?

There's that charm of yours.

Am I interrupting?

No.

You know what I was

thinking about the other day?

All of those night swims

we used to take.

Well, don't forget the pier.

Twenty feet high, and you'd

throw yourself right off.

You were so fearless

as a little girl.

I wonder what changed?

Mm.

Ah! Karen.

Hi.

Oh, no, nothing important,

just sitting here with Eleanor.

Didn't I tell you she

was home?

Quick visit from the city,

just to get a little beach time.

God knows

she could use the Vitamin D.

Eleanor was devastated

to miss the Peterson wedding.

Jillian looked truly gorgeous.

Ah, she had

her hair down, so strange.

No, no, no bar results yet,

but I'm sure she passed.

Oh, she's just like her father.

Oh, yes, she'll make

a wonderful little lawyer.

It's in her blood!

What are you

still doing here?

Just finishing things up.

You too good

to join us for a brew?

I didn't think I was invited.

You can't be serious.

You trying for this again?

Why do you still want it so bad,

after failing so many times?

'Cause I don't want

to give up yet.

Not now.

You know, I had a dream, too.

But I was forced to give it up.

Mitch, I'm--

You're not using

state supplied equipment

for your own

personal use, are you?

I thought because it was

related to work,

that it was okay

that I did it here.

You know what, bro,

I don't care what you do.

-Hello?

-Dusty? It's Nora.

Hey, what's up?

I am so sick,

I cannot come to work tomorrow.

What's wrong with you?

Something very contagious,

you do not want me there.

Where are you?

-Puking.

-No you're not, where are you?

What are you doing?

- Can you not?

- What?

Get that out of my eyes!

Oh.

Sorry.

What's going on?

I decided to go to the beach.

You decided to go to the beach?

Yeah. For a nighttime swim.

You know the park

is closed after dark.

I may have heard that

once or twice

from a certain park ranger

who is very obsessed with rules.

-Want some?

-No, I don't--

wait a minute, aren't you

not supposed to be drinking?

I'm not an alcoholic.

I didn't say

that you were, I just--

There's that look, so judgy.

Explain it to me, then.

Well, when it's bad,

it's like there's

a thousand noises,

and they all blend into this one

giant buzzing in my body.

And then on top of that,

there's like, a hundred voices--

You hear voices?

Not like that.

They're all my voice.

Telling me

all the things I'm doing wrong,

all the stuff I've said weird,

all the ways I could die.

You think I'm crazy.

No!

Well, it's really hard

to make the noises stop,

or the voices shut up.

Sometimes booze helps.

Aren't they trying

to teach you other ways

in your program?

I hate the way you say that,

"Your program."

Well, what am I

supposed to call it, then?

Why are you here, anyway?

I don't know.

-Let's go swimming!

-What? Nora!

Nora! Nora! Get off the rock!

-Let's go swimming!

-Nora, no. Hey!

We're gonna go swimming!

It's not safe.

You're more scared than I am.

Let's get you home.

Boo.

Careful on the rocks.

Do you have any food?

I'm starving.

-Just--

-Ooh.

These are good.

What are you doing?

-Um, I was just--

-Are you just signing in?

It's almost noon.

I was feeling really sick,

and I slept in, I'm sorry.

Sick, huh?

Please don't tell my therapist.

You need to be more

careful.

I don't think

Mitch really cares.

Well, he'll look for

any reason to get to you,

if he knows we're close.

"Close"?

I mean, friendly.

Anyway,

I wasn't talking about Mitch.

I don't think you should

be drinking like that.

Drinking never leads

to anything good.

You don't drink?

No.

It causes bad decision-making.

God forbid.

You don't have to

make fun of me.

It's my choice.

You know, maybe that's why

you don't have any friends.

Yeah.

Says the girl who has to

walk home from work.

All right,

I think that's a good place

to take a five.

So, then I'm about to fall

asleep, and my phone goes off.

And it's him,

with a "Hey, you up?" text.

No. Seriously?

After two weeks

of not texting me.

-What an a*s.

-I know.

Ugh. Guys, right?

Am I difficult to deal with?

Where is this coming from?

Well, I'm trying to figure out

why I don't have any friends.

I can be really fun,

but you guys frown on fun.

We don't frown on

going out with friends.

We frown on self-medication,

there's a difference.

Okay, so I'm fun,

-I'm really smart--

- Maybe don't say that

when you're trying

to make friends.

-But it's true.

-They'll figure it out

on their own.

-Fun, smart--

-You have many

great qualities, Nora.

But your social anxiety gets

in the way of allowing them

to present themselves naturally.

So I am difficult.

Oh, my God.

What if Jillian Peterson

is actually really nice,

and I'm the b*tch?

Okay, let's backtrack

for a minute.

Did you have

any friends at law school?

I mean, not really.

I had a few friends in college,

but like, party friends,

nothing meaningful.

Is there anyone now you feel

a meaningful connection with?

I only see my parents,

and they suck.

What about people

at your volunteer space? Dustin?

He prefers "Dusty."

Hi.

Sorry,

didn't mean to startle you.

Want me to get that?

Ah, no.

We're late

for our beach patrol anyway.

So, I ran into Mitch earlier.

He told me

some interesting stuff.

What did he say?

Why does he

give you so much sh*t?

He seems

to love everyone else here.

I've seen the little parties

he throws in his back office.

-We grew up together.

-Really?

Yeah, he's my stepbrother.

-Well, was.

-Wow.

Why haven't you

mentioned this before?

I wasn't exactly cool to him

when we were younger.

You? Not cool?

Ha, ha.

Yeah, I got him in a lot of

trouble over the years.

So you've always been this

into-the-rules.

That's how I saw it.

He saw it as tattling.

You said

he was your stepbrother.

Yeah.

My mom married his dad

when I was like, 13.

They divorced a few years later,

but I can't escape him.

What happened?

Well, his dad...

wasn't my mom's type.

What do you mean?

Oh, sh*t!

Walked up to him,

and I freaking slapped him

across the head,

and I said,

"Hey, dickhead, what's wrong?"

It was great.

Cheers to that.

Oh, kids, kids, kids.

I'm going to

need to see some ID.

Hey. Stop that!

I could arrest you for this.

No you couldn't.

I could have you

arrested for this.

Hey!

What the hell are you doing?

What, is he your little b*tch?

Oh, this is mine now,

you little shits.

What?

Come on!

Good work, we'll turn those in.

I was thinking we'd keep them.

Sure, whatever.

I wasn't expecting you

to give up that easily,

what's going on?

Oh, come on, I've told you

all sorts of my sh*t.

You know, this isn't even real?

I bought it online.

I've failed my law enforcement

test three times.

Three times.

So you do want to be a cop.

No.

You have to pass the exam

in order to become

a real park ranger.

I just want

to take care of the land.

Keep it beautiful.

Make people happy

to be here, the way I am.

So what's stopping you?

I get all freaked out,

and I can't do it.

The first time I took the exam,

I thought I was gonna

have a heart attack.

And now, even if I do pass,

I don't know how anybody is

ever going to take me seriously.

Well, I take you seriously.

No pass means no badge.

No badge means

I'm a trail janitor

who gets to have

some batshit crazy girl

follow him around all day.

So yeah, thanks,

that really means a lot.

-Hey!

-You're done

for the day Nora, go home.

You said you felt like

you were having a heart attack.

What?

When you took your test.

Yeah, I had to go

to the hospital and everything.

Well, was there anything wrong?

No.

That's a panic attack.

-Really?

-Yeah.

That is exactly

what happens to me.

Face it, you're just

as batshit crazy as I am.

I can help you.

Learn to deal with it.

No booze required.

Thanks, but I don't think

fixing the anxiety

is going to solve the problem.

I don't know if you noticed,

but I'm not exactly smart.

Who says?

Mitch. Everybody.

And they're right.

I was never good

at taking exams.

I didn't go to college,

I just stayed here.

I can help you study.

What do you know

about law enforcement?

Nothing, but I'm really sma--

Really good at studying,

and if Mitch

could figure it out,

I promise I can too.

I can't ask you to pick up

trash with me all day,

and then

study with me all night.

You could, if you needed to.

On your feet, Ranger.

Eleanor!

Set the table,

I'm not asking again.

In a minute!

"The police chased

a suspect vehicle for 30 miles

traveling at a speed

of 80 miles per hour."

-Wait, there's math on this?

-"After apprehending the

defendant..."

-Wait, what?

-"...they made the same trip

back to the police station

-at 40 miles per hour."

-Okay, can you start over?

"What was the average speed

the squad car traveled

for both trips?"

Okay, why is there math on this?

This is dark ops Dusty.

Cover me.

I'm going in.

Freeze, Victor! It's just us.

You're not getting out of it

this time.

No, I'm not gonna

get caught, Dusty!

You're a criminal.

You've been selling

drugs to kids!

Where's the evidence, b*tch?

What did you say?

Don't say b*tch!

Don't say b*tch--

Nora! Hi.

What are you--You're early.

Uh, come in.

I made sandwiches.

I thought you might want dinner.

Thank you.

It's a replica g*n.

It's the same weight and feel

as the real deal.

I was just studying it.

For the test.

Sure.

Let's eat.

So what do you do

when it happens?

For the anxiety.

'Cause this is all great...

but even if I remember

the terms,

and I figure out the math...

if I have a panic attack

it kind of all goes out

the window, doesn't it?

Okay.

We'll start

with some breathing exercises.

Inhale for three, hold,

exhale for four.

No, no, no.

Not like that.

From your diaphragm.

Diaphragm?

Isn't that a lady thing?

Not that one.

The body part.

-I have one?

-Everyone does.

It's what you use

to breathe deeply.

Like this.

No, no, no.

Here.

From here.

Hold.

Exhale.

Four, three, two, one.

It feels good.

Um, okay.

True or false,

based on the information

in that paragraph.

Can you fill out

a complete incident report?

False.

It is missing the time

of the incident.

Good!

Hi.

Can you tell me how to get

to the lighthouse from here?

Yes, ma'am.

Do you have a vehicle

with you today

or are you on foot?

I have a car.

Sorry, what?

I said I have a car.

Take a left

out of this parking lot,

and then your first right.

The easiest way is to exit

this part of the park entirely,

join back up with Route One,

and then make a right

about half a mile down

into the lot

that says "Dirigo Head Light."

Okay. Thanks very much.

I have big news.

Yes?

Well, I've been

improving so rapidly,

and I really want to

get out of my parents' house,

so I thought in a couple months

I'd be good enough to try again.

-Try what again?

-The Bar.

I'm signing up

to take the Bar again.

That's great, Nora!

But we want to make sure

this is coming

at an appropriate time,

and won't cause

too much additional stress.

Well, I already know

everything on it,

so I won't have

any studying to do.

I just have to be able

to take the test

and actually finish it,

and then I can get a job

and move out of my parents'

horrible home.

I love the attitude, Nora.

But we need to

balance the optimism

with some pragmatism.

It is pragmatic!

I haven't felt

this good in years.

The other night

I was making sandwiches,

and I had no problem

touching American Cheese.

I mean, I didn't put it

in my sandwich,

it's disgusting,

I don't know how Dusty likes it,

but it still felt good

to just be able to make

a sandwich.

Dusty?

You made a sandwich for Dusty?

I'm helping him

study for a test.

I made sandwiches

for our study session,

and I didn't think once

about the way he was chewing

while we were eating.

Well, do you think

maybe you didn't have a problem

touching the orange cheese

because you were making

the sandwich

for someone you connect with?

Someone you're trying to help?

That's kind of reading into it.

It's just cheese.

A month ago,

"just cheese" sent you here.

I'm sorry, I didn't mean to--

Oh, it's okay.

I was almost done.

-May I?

-Yeah. Of course.

So...

-How's it going?

-Good.

No, I'm asking for real.

How's therapy?

Oh! Um...

-it was good--

-What are you two doing?

The Petersons

will be here in half an hour!

You need to get dressed!

No, no,

you can't wear that sweater.

You know I hate

the color orange.

Orange? I think

this is more of a salmon.

No. No!

Let's go change up, darling.

I said, "This is

completely unacceptable."

Hey, you're looking

a little low there.

-Want a refill?

-Sure.

Eleanor!

I'm just going to just see

General.

Yeah.

Well, Eleanor,

you certainly are all grown up.

Younger than your daughter.

What can I get you?

All business, are we?

Single malt on the rocks.

Oops.

This is Nora.

Leave a message.

Eleanor, hors d'oeuvres.

We need more hors d'oeuvres.

Thank you, dear.

So she's beautiful,

and she cooks!

It's just cheese.

And you're just beautiful.

Excuse me. I have to go...

take a sh*t.

Oh, gotcha.

And I said to Alice,

"My Dear, you may be

the mother of the bride,

but you're just as stunning

as you were on our wedding day."

Oh, my God.

It was such a special day.

Our Jillian was so happy.

Eleanor, I understand

you saw Jill just last month!

Oh, yeah. At the Lobster Shack.

Well, Eleanor,

you didn't even mention that!

She said you were with a man!

A little something

you need to tell us about?

- Just a friend.

- Uh-huh.

So there's no one

special in your life?

No.

I find that

very hard to believe.

- Hmm.

- It's true.

The St. Clair line will probably

die along with all of my eggs.

The, uh, chicken is superb,

Susan.

Hear, hear.

- Yes. Yeah.

- Delicious.

Oh, thank you.

You can do this.

Breathe.

This is Nora,

leave a message.

You don't need her.

Right, Dusty?

You got it, Dusty.

So, then, after Umbria,

where did they go next?

They went to a private

villa on a Tuscan vineyard.

The photos were divine.

How divine of them!

So, Eleanor, how long

will you be vacationing here?

Well, I wouldn't call it

a vacation.

It's not a joke.

Well, being with us old folks

for too long is no joke!

Did my mother not tell you

why I'm here?

That's funny, you're supposed

to be her best friends.

One would think

she would've told you

her precious Eleanor is home

because she went

a teensy bit nuts.

Who needs a top off?

I'll--

I'll have another scotch.

-Me as well, please.

-Eleanor, why don't you be

a dear and--

Fetch the scotch

for my alcoholic father

and his alcoholic friend?

-On it.

-Eleanor!

You know, everybody else

in the world calls me Nora.

But that stick is wedged

just a little too far

up your a*s

for nicknames, huh?

Now that's enough.

I'm so sorry, I'm so so sorry.

She's just been so fragile

since the incident.

- It's okay.

- Eleanor, I think

it's time

you went upstairs.

Oh, I am on my way out.

By the way,

your daughter is a b*tch,

and your husband's been

hitting on me

since the moment I turned 18.

There you go.

You sleep up there?

That's so weird.

What are you doing here?

I came to help you study.

Where are your shoes?

No idea.

You didn't drive here, did you?

No, walked.

So, what happened here?

I called you.

Like, a bunch of times.

My parents have a no phones

at the dinner table policy.

I'm having problems.

I can see that.

The test is next week.

I have to pass.

I told Mitch

I was going to pass this time.

And I can't face him again

if I fail.

Oh, you're not gonna fail.

It's getting worse.

I--I can barely see.

The breathing

isn't doing anything right now.

It's just...

I know something that works

when the breathing doesn't.

Ugh.

You're a man's man.

Men love scotch.

I just don't know

what to do anymore.

Make it go away.

Oh, God. That's bad.

The more you drink it,

the more you like it.

What is the process

for a national park to become...

national.

Well, uh,

first it has to be nature...

- Yes.

- ...that is conserved...

...by a, uh,

it starts with an S.

-A So...

-A So...

-Sovereign State!

-Yes!

You are so going to crush this.

I am so going to crush this.

Let's go do something.

Uh, like what?

We can't drive anywhere.

I am going to be a federal

law enforcement person,

I can't be drinking and driving.

Let's go swim at the park!

- Mm-hmm.

- Park's closed.

You're about to pass your test

and run the park.

Okay. Let's do it.

No, no, no.

Be cool, be cool, be cool.

You just refuse to learn,

don't you?

She is with me, and I can enter

the park at any time.

Dusty, Where are your shoes?

Not sure, ma'am.

Have you two been drinking?

We're both of legal age, ma'am.

And not operating

any motor vehicles,

as you can see.

You two been

spending a lot of time together.

Nowhere in my Ivy League

law education did I learn

that making

meaningful connections

was a crime, officer.

Meaningful, did she say?

Officer,

despite you being, like,

totally obsessed with us,

we have done nothing wrong.

Are we free to go?

I guess so. Keep being safe.

We absolutely will, ma'am.

And stop calling me ma'am.

Yes, m--

Sorry. Officer.

Weird cop.

My mom used to bring me

on so many night time swims

when I was a kid.

She used to be so fun.

I don't know what happened.

Whatever.

Uh, what are you doing?

We can't swim in our clothes.

Oh, uh.

Well, we should keep

our underwear on at least.

What?

Are you afraid

to go skinny dipping?

Wow.

You really

don't want to see me naked.

The opposite, actually.

What?

I really do

want to see you naked.

But we're friends.

I shouldn't think like that.

What if I wanted to be

more than friends?

But you don't.

Why would you?

A lot of reasons.

Oh.

Yeah.

Okay.

I'm going to do that again now.

Is that okay?

Stop.

Okay. Sorry.

I'm sorry.

Thank you.

It's not personal.

It--it's just--it's just...

wrong.

I'm your supervisor.

You're so obsessed with rules.

"It's wrong, you're wrong,

you can't go on the rocks,

you can't swim at night,

you can't have sex with me

on this beach even though

I so clearly want to."

I'm sorry, but I like my rules.

You want me to change who I am?

Why?

So that we can just

have sex on this beach

and then you go off

to your next crazy thing

and then I have to

go pick up trash again

and that's that?

You think

I wanted to get with you

as some crazy thing that I do?

What, you think

this was my new version

of pulling the fire alarm?

Well, yeah.

You're the crazy one.

Have you ever

even been with anybody?

What?

How could you even say that?

That's what Mitch told me.

He said

your whole family was weird.

-I thought he was lying.

-He was lying.

You know,

I wanted to get with you,

because you're the first person

I've wanted to

be around in years.

I thought we had something,

but clearly, I'm just crazy.

I got one for you right here.

Waited up for you.

I'm sorry

I called you an alcoholic.

It was a bit harsh, tactless.

But I suppose...

there's a little

nugget of truth of it.

You-- You look out. Okay?

You don't want to

end up like me.

Better than ending up like Mom.

- Come on.

- I'm serious.

Why does she hate me so much?

You know,

she doesn't hate you.

Not even close.

She loves you.

She just doesn't always know

how to show it.

She's embarrassed of me.

Oh, I think you remind her

of what she might be like

if she didn't hold

the reins so tight.

No way.

We are nothing alike.

Y--You two are

so much more alike

than you realize.

Your mother

likes her world ordered,

and so do you.

You disrupt her sometimes.

You know, I disrupted her...

right from the start.

When we were engaged,

she thought she was going

to marry a hotshot lawyer.

And I went and failed the Bar.

You failed?

-Twice.

-Wow.

I am signing up

to take it again.

-Why?

-What do you mean?

I mean, why?

Do you even want to be a lawyer?

sh*t. I don't know.

I always just assumed

I'd do what you do.

If you don't know,

then don't do it.

I--I mean, take the time

to figure out what it is

and find what you want to do

and do that.

Something you love.

You're right.

Thanks, Dad.

I know I haven't always

been there for you.

And I--I didn't understand

the extent...

of your issues.

But I want to.

If it's not too late.

It's not.

Come here.

I am so sorry I'm late.

My mom took the car

without telling me

and then

I couldn't get a hold of her,

I don't think she's picked up--

Sit down.

We need to talk.

That is usually

what goes down in therapy.

I've received

some troubling news.

-Oh?

-Your supervisor at the park

has contacted us.

What did he have to say?

I'm going to

give you an opportunity

to come clean to me.

I thought we'd built

a trusting relationship, Nora.

I'll be a lot

less disappointed in you

if I hear this coming

out of your own mouth.

I don't know

what you're talking about.

Okay, then.

I've received

reports of t*rd

and general lack of work ethic.

Oh, yeah, um, I was late one

time

and I don't really like

nature all that much.

-I'm sorry--

-Those are not

the disturbing reports.

He told me

that you had

shown up to work hungover

on multiple occasions.

That you broke into the park

after hours to consume alcohol.

And that you attempted to engage

in an inappropriate relationship

while intoxicated.

Oh.

That stuff.

Yes. That stuff.

I'm sorry.

What exactly are you sorry for?

I'm sorry for drinking

and I'm sorry

for behaving inappropriately.

I thought he liked me back.

I'm not disappointed

that your judgment has lapsed.

That is to be expected.

I'm disappointed

that you did not choose

to seek out my help

when you had an impulse

to do these things.

Or at least tell me afterwards,

so we could work on preventing

them from happening again.

I'm adding another three weeks

on to your volunteering.

Understood?

I don't know what

the hell your problem is,

but don't ever contact me again.

What?

I wanted to ask you something.

Yeah?

Would it be possible for me

to work with someone else

from now on?

Why do you ask?

I don't feel comfortable

working with Dustin anymore.

Did something happen?

I would prefer

not to discuss it.

You can tell me.

-If he did anything

inappropriate, I will--

-No.

I just don't like

being around him.

Join the club.

Between you and I,

the Rangers all think

he might be a bit spectrum-y.

Well, it just so happens

I need a helping hand

every now and again.

-You'll work with me.

-Thank you.

You can start now.

These need to be

scanned into the system

and then faxed over to the EPA.

Off you go.

- Visitor Center, this is Dusty.

Do you copy?

Mitch here.

Has Nora signed in yet today?

Yes, she has.

She hasn't reported to me

yet for work.

- That's because she's working for me now.

- -What?

You heard me. Over and out.

Clippers, please.

What are you doing?

Asking for the clippers.

Why are you doing it so weirdly?

I thought that was protocol.

Never mind.

Can I just have the clippers?

What are you looking at?

Get back to work.

- Excuse me.

- What?

We still haven't talked

about your behavior

the other night

with the Petersons.

Since when do we talk?

You know what I can't stand

about you sometimes?

You think you're the only person

on this earth with problems.

- You are the--

- No, no.

It's me, me, me

all the time with you.

Your anxiety. Your issues.

No one could

possibly understand you.

What do you think

I have Xanax for?

For fun?

The difference between us

is I don't go around

all woe is me,

throwing my life away,

acting rude to anybody

I deem too normal

to understand me.

So, when you are ready

to get off

your obsessively high horse,

let me know.

Hi.

Paper jam?

It does that a lot.

Here.

Is Dustin bothering you?

No.

-Thank you.

-You're welcome.

Carry on.

-Hi.

-Hi.

How are you?

Fine.

-Yeah?

-Yeah.

You know,

I'm teaching a yoga class

at Two Lights this evening.

Cool.

You should really come.

Seems like you might need it.

Parents told you about

the dinner party, huh?

Six o'clock by the pond.

We pretended

that these Japanese maple leaves

were weed.

-Right? Right.

-No way.

We totally convinced him.

Oh, like, we sold out.

We rolled one up for him

and everything.

Like, it was--it was--

he bought it.

-Hey.

-So, we're smoking up,

he's hitting this thing away,

but he's so impressionable.

-Like, he wants to--

-Hey.

Um.

Anyone want to grab

a "brewski" with me tonight?

We're going to start

with our eyes closed.

Focus on your breath.

Note the rise and fall

of your chest

through your heartbeat.

And then keeping

your eyes closed,

start to move your body

in a way that feels good.

Whatever you need

in this moment.

Good, everyone.

Keep listening

to what your body needs

before we start our practice.

My body's calling out

for inversions today.

Hello.

May I please have a scotch?

Make that two, Dave.

You got it.

Are you okay?

Have I ever been?

I didn't know you liked whiskey.

I'm not really sure that I do.

You know,

you're always such a...

timid squeak of a kid.

Grew up,

you got tall and so handsome.

I thought you'd grown out

of the timid part, too.

I never...

stopped to ask myself

if you need...

real help.

Don't blame yourself.

Apparently,

I have Panic Disorder.

No sh*t.

Don't you go

making me feel dumb now, too.

You're not dumb, Dusty.

You just think differently

than other people.

Take it from me.

Being different

can be a really good thing

once you're no longer afraid

to be yourself.

How did you do it?

I was done hiding.

It was time to be me,

love it or hate it.

Yeah, but I'm not like you.

You had the courage

to come out and be yourself

in this small town.

I can't even stand up to Mitch.

You are special, Dusty.

You have more love

and compassion and decency

than anyone I know.

Stop trying to fit in.

People don't like you,

f*ck 'em.

And you have to

get away from Mitch.

I do.

But no other park

needs a trail janitor.

Don't be so hard on yourself.

You're gonna pass,

if not this time,

then the next, or the next.

What you are

not going to do is give up.

So...

tell me about this girl

I keep busting you with.

I don't know.

I thought maybe

she was good for me.

But it turns out

she might just be trouble.

A little trouble

could be just what you need.

Never expected

to hear that from a cop.

Or my mom.

Never thought I'd say it, but...

sometimes we need to...

let go of what we think we know.

Who can tell me

what exposure therapy is?

Exposure therapy

is practicing what you fear.

So, a good form

of exposure therapy

for all of you would have been

to actually raise your hand

and answer that question.

Nora, can you give an example

of something you fear?

Intimacy.

Okay.

We'll call that "connecting."

How might you practice

exposure therapy with that?

I tried and now

everything is ruined.

We're not talking about

physical intimacy.

How might you practice

connecting with another person?

Tell them

personal things about myself?

Okay, good. What else?

Ask them personal questions

about themselves?

Listen.

Be a confidant.

Offer to help them with

their shitty f*cking life.

Okay, okay,

that's--that's enough.

We will start with

the written examination.

You'll have 60 minutes

to answer 25 questions.

We'll begin in five minutes.

What do you want?

Dusty told me you guys

are stepbrothers.

Were.

Growing up with him

must have been...

interesting.

That's one way to put it.

He was an annoying

little weirdo.

Always running to his mom

anytime I had any fun.

Sounds like him.

Didn't help that his mom

was a cop, of course.

Turned out to be a d*ke too.

Don't be such a snowflake.

You're a small person.

First time I've heard that.

Wait. Dusty's mom is a cop?

You know...

...I was a really good

quarterback in high school.

Made varsity as a freshman.

We won state's all four years.

Got a full ride

to play at U Maine.

Living the dream.

And?

And your boy tattled to Mommy

one too many times.

Got suspended. Lost my ride.

He's not my boy.

Get back to work.

Nora!

If you tell me

to get off this rock,

I swear to God--

No, no, no. Look.

I've been looking at that thing

for months trying to get it.

But I couldn't.

All I could see was the drop

to the water and myself falling.

So you're afraid of heights.

Shocker.

I'm afraid of

a lot of things, Nora.

You got a can. Good job.

Don't you get it?

You believed

I could do it, so I did it.

You sound like a crazy person.

I got your note.

It helped me breathe and focus,

and I know I passed.

Well, I'm really happy

that I could fix your life

just in time for you

to ruin mine

like you ruined Mitch's.

What are you talking about?

Don't play stupid.

I don't play stupid.

I just am stupid.

And I've been so stupid.

-What are you doing?

-I'm fixing things.

I didn't mean to ruin anything.

I just--

I was scared that

you were going to get with me

and then get bored of me.

And I like you too much

for you to run away.

Your rejection

didn't ruin my life, dumbass.

It's what you did after.

You didn't even give me

a chance to talk to you after.

You'd already talked to Dr. Jha.

God forbid you would've

talked to me first.

Who's Dr. Jha?

Who's Dr. Jha? My therapist!

You told her

that I'm late and I'm lazy

and I break into the park

and drink and have inappropriate

relations with co-workers.

I didn't tell her anything.

Why would my own therapist

lie to me?

How would she even know

about any of that?

What the hell is your problem?

Weren't you taking today off?

Let me guess.

Couldn't finish the test?

Oh, I finished.

And I know I passed.

Sure you did.

Why did you do that to Nora?

I was just reporting

on her behavior

like I'm supposed to.

Poor girl could

have hurt herself.

If I remember correctly,

that was your rationale

for telling Mommy

about my drinking.

I'm sorry. Okay?

I'm sorry you lost your chance

to play football in college.

I really am.

But it was over 15 years ago.

Get over it.

Why should I get over it?

You're still the same exact

little sh*t you always were.

Yeah, well at least

I'm working on changing it.

You know what?

I'm done being bullied

over your petty teenage sh*t.

I quit.

I quit too.

If my therapist lets me.

-See you tomorrow?

-We're not working tomorrow.

I know.

Look, Nora.

We need to talk.

I'm sorry

about the other night

with the Petersons.

I'm working on it

with my therapist.

It won't happen again.

That's not what this is about.

-It's not?

-It's not.

It's not.

It's about...

how we are as a family.

It's not working anymore.

What's that supposed to mean?

Well, it means we can't keep

pretending that it does.

Nora may have

f*cked up once or twice.

Probably more like

a hundred times.

Thank you.

But she's in therapy.

She's actively

dealing with her issues.

Can we say the same?

So what do you say?

You're saying

I should go to therapy?

I'm saying that

we all should go together.

The lighthouse

is right over there.

See?

Yes.

Every night, a man would climb

all the way up there

and light the beacon.

And that way,

all the ships out to sea

could find their way home.

And--and then...

To what do I owe the pleasure,

Miss St. Clair?

-You did it!

-I did.

So what are we going to do

to celebrate?

-Are you sure this is safe?

-I did it a hundred times

as a kid.

What if there are rocks below?

It's high tide.

Ready?