01x34 - The Carnival of Doctor Kalihari

[bunniefuu]

- ♪ Defenders of the Earth, Defenders ♪

♪ Out of the sky his rockets ignite ♪

♪ Jets into battle, flies faster than light ♪

♪ Flash Gordon ♪

♪ Lord of the jungle, the hero who st*lks ♪

♪ The beasts call him brother, the ghost who walks ♪

♪ Phantom ♪

♪ Defenders of the Earth, Defenders ♪

♪ Master of magic, spells and illusion ♪

♪ Enemies crumble in fear and confusion ♪

♪ Mandrake ♪

♪ Defenders of the Earth, Defenders ♪

♪ His strength is a legend, his skills conquer all ♪

♪ Armed with his power, we never will fall ♪

♪ Lothar ♪

♪ Defenders of the Earth, Defenders ♪

♪ With our new young heroes, proving their worth ♪

♪ Four become eight, defending the Earth ♪

♪ Defenders of the Earth, Defenders ♪

♪ Defenders of the Earth ♪

- Gosh, Zuff.

Mandrake's birthday was last week,

and I still haven't found a gift for him!

What would Mandrake do with a bottle?

- Ladies and Gentlemen, welcome to the carnival!

We're gonna see the wonders of the world,

romance, ringmasters, riddles, and, and--

- Carnivals. I love them.

You enter with your wits and your money

and depart with neither.

- This is the best scam you ever came up with, Doc.

- Yes, these fools appear ripe for the plucking.

- One question, boss.

What are we gonna do about the real owners

of the carnival?

- Keep the Hendersons out of sight.

After we fleece the suckers of Central City,

I see an unfortunate future for them.

Meanwhile, my faithful Goliath, it's show time, folks!

Welcome, Ladies and Gentlemen, to my carnival,

the Carnival of Doctor Kalihari!

[cheers and applause]

- Oh my, flowers from a wand.

How terribly original!

- We are here to amaze you and amuse you.

I see a man with a top hat.

Sir, may I borrow your chapeau?

Now, I know that you've heard

that magicians pull rabbits from hats.

But how many of you have actually witnessed

such an event?

- I have!

- I perceive this rabbit shall be bright red.

[laughs]

- Mandrake, is it all right

if I look around in the old museum?

- Of course, Kshin,

but be careful and be back soon.

- Simba, the most dangerous lion on Earth!

He was the most vicious man-eater in Kenya.

Captured personally by Doctor Kalihari and myself.

Now see man's mastery over beast.

- I don't like this.

That lion isn't angry, he's frightened.

Take it easy, big fella.

You have some friends here.

- That's a real dangerous lion you got there, Mister!

- Keep trying, little lady.

You'll get it next time!

- Let me take a shot at it.

- Hey, you're not playing fair.

- So sue me.

Meanwhile, the lady will take the teddy bear,

if it's all the same to you.

- One thousand pounds!

Not another man alive could lift that!

- Are you gonna let him get away with that one, Dad?

- I am in a most kindly mood at the moment.

- Solid ten-point steel!

I am Goliath,

and I am the strongest man alive.

Any of you wimps out there think you can do this?

Want to try your strength, little man?

- Sure.

But I need some working room.

A perfect fit.

- Welcome to the Museum of Magic!

Looking for something special, young man?

- I'm, uh, looking for a birthday present

for my friend.

- The gentleman in the tall hat perchance?

- Yeah, Mandrake.

He's the greatest magician in the world!

- Is that right?

Well, for the greatest magician in the world,

we must have something special.

Yes!

What about this?

Kali.

The Hindu Goddess of Death!
[ … ]

No, no. You're right.

That won't do.

Now this is what I call really very special.

This container with its magical potion

was created eons ago, in the mysterious east.

- Wow!

Just like in the book!

What's the writing say?

- Even I, with all my knowledge,

have been unable to decipher the inscription.

- Great! Oh, I hope I have enough money.

That's for you.

It's you birthday gift, a little late, but...

- Why?

Thank you, Kshin.

- Have you seen Rick and L.J.?

Come on, Zuff, let's go find them.

- What in the blazes is that, Mandrake?

- A gift from Kshin.

Surprisingly enough for this carvinal,

it appears to be slightly genuine.

- They're ruining the whole scam, Doc.

I say we throw them out on their ear.

- Let me take a look at that!

I'm sorry, Mandrake. I--

I feel weird.

- Flash, you're shrinking!

- I'm not alone, buddy, Look at you.

- So am I.

- What's happening?

- Well, what do we have here?

Little People.

And we can always find a place for little people

at Doctor Kalihari's Carnival.

- I have no idea what caused you four to shrink,

but it makes you worthy additions to my collection.

Take them away!

- There goes my chance to make it big in show biz!

- I know you're in here, little man.

- You're not looking in the right places, Goliath!

- All right, master magician, what magic can save you now?

- I always respond to requests from the audience.

- Poor illusion, Mandrake.

Remember, I know every inch of this phony haunted house.

- There are illusions within illusions, Kalihari.

- Just like an adult, never on time.

- They're probably still in there,

remembering when they were small.

- Dad, what happened to you?

You've shrunk!

- You won't believe this,

but there was this magic bottle, see and--

- Oh, no!

My present!

- We could stand around here all day

making small talk, but--

- Time is short.

Let's get out of here!

- I suggest you all stand very still.

I hope you will be comfortable in your new quarters.

Allow me to introduce you to your roommates.

Mr and Mrs. Henderson,

once the owners

of this magnificent world of make-believe!

- You're a thief!

You stole this carnival from us!

- Quiet!

Or you'll be fed to those flea-bitten lions of yours!

Goliath, stand guard.

- Kshin, do you remember anything else about the bottle?

- Just what I told you, Dynac.

It looked just like the picture in Mandrake's book.

I thought you'd like it, Mandrake, and I'm sorry,

I'm really sorry.

- Kshin, we will find a way to correct this.

I promise.

- Dynac, can you reverse this shrinking process?

- Negative.

Analysis shows that this shrinking process

cannot be reversed by scientific means.

The answer must lie in the discarded bottle.

- Yeah, well, first we got to get out of here.

- All biological indicators show

there is very little time left.

- Thanks a lot.

I feel strange again.

- Oh, no!

- Dad, what are we gonna do?

- I don't know, son.

But for starters we're heading out of here.

- Knock it off!

- I believe the inscription is pre-Sumerian.

- Is that good?

- Keep your analysis short.

I see very little humor in this situation.

- As ye ruined me, little by little,

he shall be destroyed the same.

And ye shall never discover the answer

which is the same.

- I don't get it.
[ … ]

Will somebody please tell me what it all means?

- It means we're gonna keep shrinking,

until we disappear.

Zap!

No more Defenders!

- Hey! They got away!

- The inscription intimates that whoever built the bottle,

also made a cure, an antidote.

- Great, that means another bottle.

- Lying in some pre-Sumerian desert somewhere.

- Don't be so cheerful, Lothar.

Look on the bright side.

What else could happen to us?

I had to go and ask!

Contact!

Contact!

I said, start, you poor excuse for an airplane!

- Let's go!

This is not a healthy environment.

- They're here! They in here!

- Let's see if we can land the big one.

- A real fish out of water.

- Come back here.

I'll get you if it's the last thing I do!

- Nerd at o'clock, attack!

- You line them up, Phantom, and I'll mow them down!

Didn't I see that ape on the top

of the Empire State Building swatting planes?

Take that!

And oops!

Unhand me!

Who do you think I am, you monkey.

- Now I got you!

- No, you don't!

Gee-ronimo!

- You're the magician, Mandrake,

how about a little illusion?

- My public calls!

- What was that about a second bottle, Dad?

- Mandrake thinks there may be another bottle

with the antidote in it.

- That's right!

Just like the picture I saw in Mandrake's book,

and I saw the other bottle in Kalihari's museum!

- I think we've got the answer.

Oh, no.

Not again!

- Guess you tinies have run out of tricks.

- You know, Flash,

this would be a great time for you to feel funny again.

- I don't know.

The next time we shrink, it could be no more Defenders.

- Come on! Come on!

- I'm close!

I'm close!

- Close only counts in horseshoes.

- How did you ever get involved with Kalihari?

- We hired him as the assistant manager.

- He started bringing in his own people.

At first we didn't know what kind of people.

- We found out too late.

- Don't worry. We will find a way out.

- I think I got it.

No I don't.

- Maybe we should approach this problem feet-first.

Thank you, thank you.

I will accept applause or money.

- You folks stay here where it's safe.

We'll be right back.

- The lion's loose!

- And so we move

from one happy moment to another.

- Somebody let the cat out of the bag.

- Relax, gentlemen.

- Phantom, wherever you're lurking,

come on out.

We badly need your ten tigers right now!

- By the size of things,

I'm afraid they'll be ten kittens.

- I owe you one.

Please return to your cage, now.

- Father!

- Jedda, watch where you step.

- We got to get in the museum and find the other bottle

before it's too late.

- I am not happy with these events.

- Those little guys are ruining everything, boss.

- Then forget capturing them!

Destroy them!

Destroy them all!

- I'll get it next time.

You wait and see.

- Never mind, L.J., I'll get it.

- If you guys are as good on windows as you are on doors.

We'll never get through that!

- No, but they can!

- All we need is a boost!

- Careful, Kshin, I break easily.

- Easy, son, if you drop me,

you are going to be in real trouble.
[ … ]

- Come on, Dad!

Don't be small about this.

Where's your sense of humor?

- It has shrunk proportionately.

- Okay, here's the game plan.

I want you kids out of sight, back to the van.

- Those guys are gonna be back with reinforcements any minute!

- Exactly!

And if we don't show up in twenty minutes,

head for Monitor!

- But Dad, we can't leave you.

- That's an order, son!

Get going.

Lothar, old buddy.

How do we get down?

- No problem.

- Hey, I can fly anything, except ropes.

- What's this rope hang-up?

- Last time I checked, ropes didn't have wings!

- Charge!

- Okay, we're inside.

What next?

- Drop.

- Are you kidding me?

- It'll be a soft landing, trust me, Flash.

- Remember, I'm only three inches tall.

- The bigger they are, the harder the fall.

You'll have no problem, Flash.

- Softest landing I ever had.

- The next order of business, gentlemen,

is finding that bottle.

- There's our objective.

- That is not an objective, that is Mount Everest.

- We need to get up there.

- Let's hope this works.

I need a volunteer.

Lothar, you're it.

- Ladies and Gentlemen,

step right up and see how high we can fly.

- Have you had lunch?

- If you're through mousing around,

would you care to join us?

- So sorry.

I had to break a dinner date.

- I feel strange.

I'm shrinking again!

- Doctor Kalihari,

I've been looking forward to a chat with you.

- Let's see how brave you are with guys your own size.

- Don't believe them, Doc.

They're doing it with mirrors.

- There's only one way you can deal with trash,

throw it out!

- Give it your best shot, boys.

Didn't even get my hands dirty that time.

- Attack, Brutus!

Attack!

- Fetch, boy!

- You won't dispose of me so easily.

- What? Why I?

- That should be the last we ever see of them.

- We thank you for returning our carnival to us.

- You all have a lifetime pass to the Henderson Carnival!

Now back to work!

We must get ready for tonight!

- Next time we have a family outing,

I suggest a picnic.

- Hey, Rick, what's wrong?

- We blew it.

You realize we had our fathers in the palms of our hands

and we didn't even ask for a raise in our allowances?

[laughs]