01x02 - Mixed Signal

[bunniefuu]

- Say you love me.
- Previously on "sistas"...

- I love you.
- I'm a cool dude. I work hard.

I'd really like to take you out.

I just got the largest
divorce settlement

my firm has ever seen.

I never had a woman
like you before.

And you never will again.

Damn, you fine, Gary.

We've been waiting to meet
this mystery man for 6 months!

Thank you for not telling
the girls that Gary's married.

First, I'd like to say I hate that
we're here to talk about divorce.

Where do we start?

Let's start with
your husband's name.

Gary Marshall borders.

I'm sorry.
What was his name?

Gary Marshall borders.

I'm sorry. Would you
like some water?

No, thanks. I'm fine.

I'm used to the heat.
I'm from Albuquerque.

Right.

Ok.

Would you excuse me
for a moment?

Yeah. Sure.

I had too much coffee.

Mmm. Gotcha.
Yeah, no worries.

Ok, thanks.

Ok, I didn't make it.

- Karen.
- Ok, yeah,

well, I know you didn't
either, ok?

- Why was you so weak?
- Karen...

Don't call me judging me, ok?

At least zak is not married.

Karen! She's here.

Who?

His wife.

Where?

She's in my office.

Wait. What the hell
you talkin' about?

The woman I won
all that money for?

She recommended me to her.

Oh, that's a good thing.

No, the hell it's not.

Well, it means
he's telling the truth.

He's getting a divorce.

You don't understand.

She wants me to represent her.

Oh, hell, no!
You can't do that.

I know that.

Well, just give
her to someone else.

Give her to another lawyer.

She cannot be
represented here at all.

That is a clear conflict.

Well, then, you gotta
tell your boss.

What, that I am sleeping
with a married man?

Andi, what else you gonna do?

You just got the job.

I know, and I have never
made this much money.

What you gonna do, girl?

I don't know.

Look, you better figure it out.

I'm gonna call you back.

Ok. Bye.

Woman: ♪ don't my girls
hold me down ♪

Woman: ♪ don't my girls
♪ let them boys mess around ♪

♪ My love life is a headache ♪

♪ We're going out tonight ♪

♪ 'Cause I'm into the love ♪

Sir, I need to talk to you.

What are you doing?
She's waiting.

Yes, I know, but I just need to tell
you something before I go back in there.

Andi, talk to her first.

I think that she needs
another lawyer, sir.

Why?

Because I am not suitable
to handle this case.

Don: I hate to be blunt,
but Helen said she wanted a black woman.

She referred you to her.
What's the problem?

I think that there may be
a conflict of interest.

Don: Listen, this is
just cold feet, ok?

You got this. You're
gonna be great at it.

You made $6 million
for this firm in just 2 cases

and 800,000 for yourself.

This is another big one.

Go on. Go get it.

We're counting on you.
Make this work.

Yes, sir.

So sorry.

No. I'm sorry.

I just...

I never thought
it would come to this.

I just... I love him
so much.

But I have to
have standards, you know?

I mean, you have to hold
them to the fire at some point,

otherwise they'll
run all over you.

I...

Have a really great associate

who has been with us
for many years,

and he...
- No.

He has handled
over 400 divorces.

- No.
- He would be perfect.

No, no, no.
I want you.

Helen said that you are the best

and that you are almost
like a therapist to her.

And now she's so happy.

I just want to get out
of this thing happy.

Ok? So I want you,
you and only you.

That man took my entire life.

He owes me!

b*stard.

May I ask why
you want a divorce?

How much time you got?
I got lots of reasons.

Such as?

He's a liar...

A cheater...

- Cheater?
- An ab*ser...

An ab*ser?

Yes. And I know
he's cheating with someone,

and I'm sick of it!

Has he done this before?

Yes.

Do you have proof
of his affairs?

He's careful,

so careful.

And whoever this woman is,
she's different.

He showers more.

He wears different clothes.

I hear him whispering.

And I want to know
who that b*tch is!

I'm sorry.

No. Don't be.

It's not your fault.

Look, I know
he's gonna leave me,

but I want to beat him to it.

So I hired a private detective.

Do they have anything?

As I said, he's careful.

But I know he's gonna
find something soon.

I think that she's at his gym.

W-Why do you think that?

The private detective follows
him to the gym at 5 A.M.

He parks at the building
across the street,

but doesn't appear to the gym
until an hour later.

You can help me...

Can't you?

Tell me more, and I will
see what I can do.

Ok.

On Saturdays, we're
supposed to meet at the mall.

I'm sorry.

About last night?

About everything.

I hear you.

But you don't accept my apology?

Zac, look...

Listen, I just...

I just want things to go
back to the way they were.

Then you shouldn't
have done what you did!

I know! I know!
But what's done is done.

Can we just move forward?

That ain't how it works, Zac.

'Cause you want to be mad.

No. 'Cause I'm hurt.

You know what...

You don't get this.

And this selfish-a*s
conversation

that you are having
with me right now

just continues to inform me
that you don't get this.

- I get it.
- No, you don't.

You think just 'cause I... you
last night it's all good?

We cool?

If I can recall,
I did all the...

We got jokes right now?

No, I don't... I'm just
trying to make you laugh.

By telling a joke about ...?

You know what that just
made me think about?

You... her.

You know what I was thinkin' about
last night when you was on your knees?

How you did that to her.

Why would you be
thinking about her?

This between you and me.

You know what,
can you just get out?

'Cause I regret
last night for sure.

Ok, all right, you was weak.
I was weak.

But you still mad, and I'm
still in the doghouse.

All I'm saying is we
gotta move forward.

That's all, baby.

No. That ain't all.

Then what?

You forgot one thing.

What?

You still want me to leave?

Damn right.

You know what...

I'm not even trying
to upset you right now.

You got a long day ahead of you.

I won't be here
when you get back.

Ok.

That's for the best.

Ok.

What?

And then he said he wouldn't
be there when I got home.

Well, that's what you wanted.

No, it ain't!

You asked him to leave.

Well, why didn't he
wake up and just agree?

- Karen...
- No.

You know what, he came into
my bedroom last night, ok?

I know he heard my vibrator.
He knew I was horny.

He knew that he'd got to me.

Ok, will you calm down?

- He played me.
- He did not play you.

You asked him to leave.

Well, he should have stayed.

Didn't we have a
conversation about mixed signals?

This is not
a mixed signal, 'brina.

I wonder if that h* texted him.

- Karen...
- Nope.

That is what happened, 'brina.

She texted him, and she
told him to come on over.

She told him to come on!

You know I hate it when you
go down this rabbit hole.

I'm telling you!

But you don't
know that to be true.

You know what, I know who will.

Karen, no.
Do not involve danni.

Please don't involve her.

You know she's like
the insta-FBI.

She's gonna be all over social media
trying to put this all together.

Ok, I'm not gonna tell her, ok?

'Cause I ain't runnin'
after him no more.

Good.
Look, I gotta go

'cause I gotta
open up this bank,

and I will talk to you later.

Ok.

And tell danni I said hi.
- What?

Oh, you will be
calling her by lunch.

No, I will not, ok? Bye.

Ok. I'll talk
to you later. Bye.

sh*t.

Oh, good morning!

Sabrina, I just wanted
you to witness this.

Man: I've got a delivery for...

Me, darling.

- Are you Sabrina hollins?
- Oh!

No, that thot is right there.

You a hater. That's me.

- Sign right here.
- Thank you.

Wow.

Ugly-a*s flowers.
I don't like 'em no way.

What you signin', girl?
The declaration of independence?

- Thank you.
- Thank you so much.

Who they from?

Mmm...

Calvin.

Oh, "thanks for a great dinner"

"and I can't wait
to see you again

"so you can tell me
it was black." Ha!

What's black?

Mmm... we were at dinner, and
he was just making this joke

about how my dress is blue,
but it's black.

It was super funny.

That don't sound funny to me.

You are the worst.

So, did you sleep
with him, girl?

What are you talking about?

I know you went out with my man,

so I just need to know
did you take him home

and do the damn thing or not?

No.

He just seems like a nice guy.

Well, sending flowers
and sh*t, it seems...

Hush up.

You gonna see him again?

As a matter of fact, I might.

Mmm...

- It does say "lunch?"
- Don't.

What?

Don't make yourself
so available.

I'm not making myself available!

I'm not doing anything.

Then find something to do.

You can't be available
every time he calls.

I'm not playing those games.

You can't win unless
you play the game.

I'm not doing that.

Cool. Well,
be available.

He'll be gone in 2 weeks.

How do you know that?

Hmm. I know men, Sabrina.

I am one.

Well...

What are you trying to say?

No. Hold on, hold on.
Don't get offended.

- Of course you're a man.
- Oh, yeah.

Oh, yes, you're a man,
but I mean...

You were a little misleading.

Huh? You did say that
he was into you.

No, I still stand by that.

You're clearly wrong.

Cool.

Enjoy your 2 weeks.

When's the last time
you had a relationship

that lasted longer than 2 weeks?

Exactly my point.

Go open the door.

We got a bank to run.

Be about 30 minutes under the
dryer, then you'll be right out, ok?

Woman: Yeah.

You came early today, too, huh?

- Hey.
- Hey, girl.

Tito, you come bring
her under the dryer?

Go ahead, baby. Go ahead.

Hey.

Girl, you look like
I feel. What's up?

Nope. You first.

No. You go ahead.

No. You tell me.

- Gary.
- Zac.

Look, I'm sorry.
Go ahead. Go on.

No. I...

You first.

Zac left this morning
without putting up a fight,

and I just... I think
he's with that girl.

- Oh, damn. What the hell?
- I know.

Every black woman in the city
can't be going through this sh*t.

Can't be.

All right, come on.
I'm hungry.

Ok, but I'm meeting up
with danni.

Wait. Then we won't be
able to talk about this.

I know. She gonna be too busy
talking about my situation anyway.

Mmm, good point.
Give me a break.

- Right.
- Well, is bri coming?

No, she got a date.

With the guy from last night?

Mm-hmm.

Oh, he's taking her out again?

Lunch, apparently.

Wow.

Well, I hope she has
better luck than me.

I mean us.

No, Zac's gone.
You mean you.

- No, I mean us.
- You ready?

Oh, you gonna
change the subject?

- Are you ready?
- I'm ready. Can we eat?

Ha ha! Are you serious?

You mean to tell me
you've never come here before?

No.

Oh, what, it's too much
of a dive for you?

- No.
- Hmm.

I mean, I love it.

I just can't, you know,
eat like this every day.

This grown-woman weight
won't fall off like it used to.

Girl, what are you
talking about?

You look terrific. Stop it.

You see that right there?

What?

Your smile is...

It's like life.

Ok, stop.

No. Your smile is what
life should be.

You're beautiful.

Ok, Calvin.
What... what's up?

Where is your girlfriend?

Oh, wow! I knew
this was coming.

Well, you did ask me.

All right. Well, there's the door
if you want to run, 'cause...

Nope. I'm ready. Go.

Ok.

Well, I am single because
I have a kid

and a baby mama
that's bat-sh*t crazy.

Hmm. Ok.

Why didn't you two make it?

Did you not hear the crazy part?

Yes, but there had to have been a time
when you found her attractive, right?

Are we speaking honestly?

That's the only way
I want to speak.

It was her body.

Wow. That is so shallow.

No, no, no, wait.
Before you start dragging me,

all right, like any other man,
I saw her, thought she was sexy.

- Where?
- I hit her up.

- On the 'gram?
- Yeah.

All right, go ahead, keep going.

Thank you.

So, I hit her up, you know,
slid in her dm.

We knew each other
for, like, 2 days.

Next thing I know, she's talking
about that she loves me

and she wants to be with me,
and it was... aghh!

That's scary.

Yeah, tell me about it.

That's not even the scary part.

We only had sex one time.

Now I got a baby boy.

- Wow!
- Yeah.

But you do it only takes
one time, right?

Yeah. I know.

I mean, my baby boy...
He's... Amazing, but...

The baby mama...

Both: Bat-sh*t crazy!

- Right. So you understand.
- I got it.

It's crazy.

Laz: Calvin?

Oh, my god! Laz?

Oh, my god!

Mwah!

- It is so good to see you.
- It's good to see you.

- I can't believe it!
- This is crazy.

- It is.
- How you been?

- So good.
- Good.

Oh, I'm so sorry.
Sabrina, this is laz.

Laz, this is Sabrina.

- Hi!
- Hi.

Oh, my god.
My car's outside.

Laz: Will you please call me?
I miss you!

- I miss you!
- Please?

- Please call me. Please.
- I definitely will.

Definitely, man.
You already know.

Ok, 'cause that thing you
did last time I saw you,

I am still in pain!

Oh, my god. I can't
believe you remember...

Laz: Of course I do. It was good
to meet you, Katrina.

It's sabri...

Wow! Mmm, mmm, mmm.

Good old laz.

Ah... mmm.

Mm-hmm. You have
a little lip...

Oh. Ha ha!

Mmm. Good ol'...

Gotta go. You know,
I have an appointment,

so I think I should
get out of here.

Ok. Well, guess I'll just
go grab the check.

Uh-huh.

That's him texting you?

No, it's bri.

Oh. What she saying?

She asks where we are
and she said, "don't move."

She's on the way, apparently.

Well...

You better hurry up
and finish this conversation

before she and danni get here.

Girl, what am I gonna do?

What else did she say?

I mean some of everything.

The man she described...
She said he yells at her

and he belittles her and...

I mean, I've never
seen any of that.

Andi, you can't take
that lady's case.

I know.

I'm just gonna go back to my job

and I'm gonna tell 'em
I can't do it.

What reason will you give 'em?

You're gonna help me
think of that.

- Oh.
- Please?

Mmm... um-mmm.

I don't know.
I really don't.

I don't know nothin'
about love, so...

Neither do I, apparently.

Andi, you could lose your job.

You remember how hard
you worked in law school.

You can't lose that
for that man.

Yeah.

And, girl, she hired
a private detective

to follow him every morning.

When he's with you?

They're trying to figure out
why he parks in his building

and waits an hour
to go to workout.

Your building.

- Yes.
- Girl...

The gym is across the street.

I don't like this.
I don't like this at all.

Neither do I, but I
have to tell my boss.

Why did she choose me?

Girl...

What?

You think she knows?

No.

Wait. What if she
knows it's you

and she's messing
with you, Andi?

I don't think she'll
go through the trouble

of doing all that
just to mess with me.

- Look...
- That's cra...

Don't put it past her.

Just talk to your boss.

Ok...

Hey, girl.
Go ahead, sit down.

How you doing?

- Hey.
- How are you?

I'm sorry. I just...

For what?

Well, what he do now?

Girl, I just wanted to
take you to lunch. Stop!

What did I do?

Nothing!

You two never call me for lunch.

Well, I wanted to.

Oh, ok.

Uh... yeah, so I did charge
my Amazon bill to your account,

but you know I'm gonna
pay you back, Karen.

Gotta bring me here,
shake me down,

I didn't know you
did that, danni.

Forget I said that
until the 1st.

I just wanted to bring you
to lunch. That's it, so...

Oh, sh*t. Who died?

- Oh, my god.
- What did you do?

Come on.
Nobody died. Ok?

I just wanted to
talk to you. That's all.

Ok.

Zac said some things,

and I just wanted to get your
opinion on it. That's all.

You know what, I'm just...
I'm not hooking anyone else up.

You know, um...

I should just whoop his a*s.

What did he do now?
Can I get a drink, please?

Girl, you about
to go back to work.

- What are you talking about?
- Right? Exactly.

It'll help me
from k*lling the b*tch.

I need peach vodka.

That's what he did.

- No. Doesn't sound right.
- I know!

Am I being crazy?

Yes.

No. He got up and left
without a fight?

Right.

He with that h*.

- Ok, see, you...
- You think so?

You two... you don't need
to talk to each other.

You make each other crazy.

No, Karen, you right.

He with that h*!

- You think so, right?
- Yeah!

She probably called
him this morning

and told him he can
come stay with her.

- That's what I said, Andi!
- Don't do this, Karen.

I promise you, I can find out.

- Thank you, girl.
- I will.

- I just want to know.
- I got you.

Hey, girl. You're late.
We gotta go back to work.

He kissed a man.

Oh, we gotta talk.

What are you talking about?

Well...

We were sitting in there,
and then this guy comes in.

And I mean, that
b*tch was... Beat.

- Oh...
- Oh...

He had the heels
and the headwrap,

but a full beard.

And the eyebrows were arched.

Yasss, honey.

Stop it.

You talkin' about the man
that you met last night?

Calvin.

- Yes.
- Ok.

I mean, then the guy, you know,
he comes up and they greet

and they say hi,
and then they hug...

Really, really tight.

And then the guy says...

"The last time I saw you,
you were in so much pain."

- Oh...
- Oh...

What are you doing?

I'm seeing how much room
I got to fall out!

- Stop it, danni!
- Ha ha!

- This is not funny.
- Sorry, sorry.

- Danni, stop.
- I'm not...

Stop. Ok? Go ahead.
Go ahead, 'brina.

I'm listening.
Danni!

Ok. Did he
introduce you?

Yes.

Good. Did he say
who he was?

He didn't say a damn thing.

Maybe because
there's nothing to tell.

Maybe.

Or he's been getting that tail

and pinning the d*ck
on the donkey.

Danni.

Of course. Of course. Why do
I even tell you anything?

You know that's why you confide.

Oh, I'm not talking
to him no more.

Wait a minute, 'brina.
Why don't you just ask him?

No, look. This is
what you do.

You take him home,
you pull out your vibrator.

When he sees you, you know, you
let him go up in there with it.

Um, could we not
do this at lunch?

Oh, don't act like you
wasn't... Gary last night,

the man you claim
you gonna be leaving.

Ahem.

Did you break it off?

It's a very nice
place, actually.

Did you break it off?

Um... No.

- The d*ck...
- But I will.

I will... Soon.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.
That d too good.

And he's fine as hell.

That's true.

Dark-skinned brother
have you feenin'...

Also true.

Wait a minute.

What?

You really called her
about that?

Oh, no. No.

No.

And you're really
gonna listen to her?

You know she's always
going off the deep end.

- True.
- That's where the truth is.

- Sometimes.
- Like that time when...

What's his name?

- Craig.
- It's Craig.

Craig... he was... yeah, you thought
he was cheating on you,

but you actually
chased his mama down.

Girl, you broke
that woman's hip.

I shoulda. Nobody told that
old b*tch to be in red bottoms.

She looked young from the back!

She's 70.

She was still smaller than me

with them brittle-a*s bones.

You're lucky
you didn't get sued.

I didn't know the b*tch
had osteoporosis.

I contributed to
the fund afterwards.

Ok. All I can say,
don't listen to her.

Just making my point.

Good point.

- It's over. You good.
- Thank you.

'Cause I'm telling
the truth, all right.

Listen, I'll show you.
Come to my house tonight.

We'll go through the 'gram...

- Ok.
- No.

And I'll put it
all together for you.

- Yes!
- For a small fee.

Don't do it.

Bring wine and weed.
But I gots to go.

Yeah, listen,
call me when he calls you.

- Did y'all pay the bill?
- No. You got it, right?

- Yep. Oh.
- I'm trapped! Help me!

- Help yourself!
- Aah!

Bye!

Those aren't my friends.

- You're late.
- I'm sorry.

You know I cannot leave
until you come back.

I know. I said I'm sorry.

So how was lunch?

Good.

What was he wearing?

Jeans.

Did he smell good, girl?

Ok. Where is your head at?

Nowhere. It's just I look
book, chapter, and verse.

Don't you have to go to lunch?

Oh, girl, I can eat and talk.

Great.

Tell me, girl.

Ok. Can I ask you something?

Oh, this fella be good, huh.

Never mind.

Don't do that. Come on.

What did he do?
Tell extravaganza!

Who's extravaganza?

That's my drag name.

Hmm. That's cute.

What did he do?

Is it wrong for me to
assume that a man's g*y

because he has g*y friends?

Oh, yeah, that's
ignorant as sh*t.

You're right.

What kind of g*y friend?

What do you mean?

You know, the I, the g, the b,
the t, the q, the I, or the a?

Why does that matter?

Well, it doesn't matter.

If the friend's a les, but...

Well, I mean, there was this guy
who came into the restaurant.

You know, his name is laz.

Now, was his name laz
or was his name lazz!

Maurice.

- Anyway...
- Mm-hmm.

They greeted each other and they
hugged and then they kissed.

Wait, wait, wait.

Where he kiss the man?

On the lips.

Aw, yeah, girl.
He just as g*y

as my unicorn picnic basket.

Ok, nothing wrong with that,
but it's true.

Come on, will you talk to me?

Do you like him?

No.

Yes, you do.

Because if you didn't,
you wouldn't be bothered.

I mean, he just seems like
a really nice guy.

I was just thrown off by that.

Just ask him.

I already did.
He told me he was straight.

Straight straight
or straight with a twist?

Can't you just find out
if he is and, like, you know,

ask around or something?

Absolutely. How about I just
hop on the queen's hotline

and see if anybody knows him

'cause all of us gays
know each other!

You know what,
you're just being silly.

I don't want to talk to you.

Just ask the man, ok?

You suck.

And you better hope your man
don't swallow. Ok? Ha ha!

Such an as*h*le.

Oh h*! That too!

Get back to work.
Next, please!

Hi, how are you?

I'm about to leave.
How did it go?

I need to talk to you, sir.

Ok. Sounds serious.

Yes, it is.

I think I know
what this is about.

You do?

Yeah. I was looking over
the salary offer we made you,

and it's really low and unfair.

I think we should
bump it about 11%.

That'll put you right on par
with Nelson, our other recruit.

Well, I appreciate that...

And he did go to
Harvard, you know.

Yes, but I also...

Listen, I don't want to get
into negotiating with you.

You're a hell of a negotiator,

and I know you
have other offers.

And if you don't, you will.

I just want to make sure
you're happy here.

I can't represent
Jasmine borders.

Why?

Because there is a clear
conflict of interest.

How conflicted?

It's extreme.

Don: That's really
disappointing.

I'm sorry, too, because I think
I'm gonna have to hold off

on that salary offer.

I don't think you understand,
but Helen, who recommended her,

is the head of the rhinehouse,
the elite women of this town.

They meet every Wednesday
to talk about school, kids,

whatever their husbands
are doing.

Morris and Winston
had them for years

and made millions,

and you brought them to us.

I can still do my job.

Don: Not if you turn tail
on your best friend.

But the conflict is gonna...

I think you need to think long
and hard about this conflict...

And be sure that
it is a conflict.

I know her husband.

How?

I see.

I'm sorry.

You should go home.

Are you firing me?

No. Hell, no.

But you should go home.

And I want you to think
about what I said.

Think about that conflict.

And is it really a conflict?

Attorney barns? We never
had this conversation.

Hey, baggage, you good?
Be right back.

Hey!

Come on, danni!
Every day?

No, sir. Get your a*s off this
cart and come talk to me right now.

I got to get these old ladies.

Danni... dan...

Tell them old b*tches
it broke down.

Danni, you messin'
with my tip money.

What are you doing?

Give me my key.

Hold on.

There it is.

Almost... oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

- Really?
- Take it.

Girl, I will take it.

You know, you're messin' over
my friend, right?

She's a good woman.

I know that, danni.
I know it.

Then why did you leave?

She told me to leave.

- She didn't mean that...
- You see this right here?

This right here
is what's wrong with you.

That's why you're all single.

Yes, 'cause y'all crazy.

I'll slap the sh*t out you.

Go ahead on with that, danni.

My girl has been there for you.

I know that. She never
let me forget it.

Aw...

What are you talking about?

She always on my sh*t, all right,
just because I can't pay a bill

or I need to borrow the car.

Like, nobody want to hear
that every day.

I'm a grown-a*s man.

Well, get a better job.

With my record?

I'm happy as hell
to have this one.

So because you're
in your feelings,

you're gonna let the best
thing that ever happened to you

just pass you right by?

- You...
- See that?

That's... that's Karen.

You don't get it.

Tell me.

- Danni, I'm trying.
- Ok.

You know I'm on your side.

- You're on my side?
- Yes.

So then give me my key back so I
can go make some more money.

Where are you staying?

You know I'll take
that key, right?

Do it.

Boy, don't do that!

I'll... you right here
on this carpet like a rabbit.

- Do you want that?
- Give me it!

In front of these people?

I don't know them,
but give me the damn key.

That's not it. No.

Actually, come on.
Help me out.

- Danni!
- See? See?

You were gonna
do it, weren't you?

It feels good.

Whoo!

Was good to myself.

You ain't sh*t.

Thank you.

You just like your friend.
She reminds me every day.

Why these keys so sweaty?

I got a warm bosom.

They'll short-circuit the cart.

Cart coming through!
Cart coming through!

Yo, khakis, I said
"cart coming through," bro.

You ain't even paying attention.

Woman: Excuse me.

Man: It ain't all it's
cracked up to be.

Excuse me?

Marriage. Trust me.

Oh. Ok.

Uh, Aaron Carter.

Karen.

How are you?

Tired. Excuse me.

You see that right there,
that attitude,

is why you're single.

Oh! First of all, you as*h*le,
I'm not single.

And second of all, watch who
the hell you're talking to.

You do the same
with your rude a*s.

Rude. Me?

Yeah. I'm just saying
hi to you.

- You can't even say hi back?
- Whatever. Ok?

See? That's why
I date white women.

You try and give a sister a chance,
they got attitude about every damn thing.

Oh, wait a minute.
A chance?

What chance?

You ain't never had a chance
even when you walked up here.

Ok, so, yes, yes. Some of us
do have an attitude

'cause we are tired
of playing weak

so sorry-a*s... Like you
could feel strong...

- Now, hold on...
- No, no, no, no. Ok?

We are tired of
dumbing ourselves down

so that your ego
can be inflated.

Tired of playing your mama,
your daddy, and your damn therapist

when all we really
want to do is just be. Hmm?

Be us, be women.

So get the ...Out of here
with that sh*t, ok?

That way.
Bye...

Woman: With your tired a*s.

Woman: Next time,
bring popcorn.

Gary, on recording: Hey, babe.

Been calling you all day.

I just called into Albuquerque,
last-minute things.

So I can't see you
tomorrow morning.

I love you. Hope you're
kicking a*s today.

Hey.

Leave me alone.

Please?

You want to get
cussed out again?

I just want to apologize.

Ok, good. Now you
can be gone.

Come on, look. I'm going
through some things, too, all right?

I just found out my wife is
screwing around on me.

I'm mad. I came out here. I saw you,
and I ended up taking it out on you

when it's really all my
stuff, so I apologize.

Was she white?

I don't know why race
really has to come into it.

Oh, she was white.

Look...

I got some ice cream, too.

Do you want some company?

I don't know you.

You cussed me out like you did.

Can you leave me alone, please?

All right.

Well, you got the
right idea, so...

I'll be over sitting in my truck

going into a sugar coma, too.

- Do that.
- Yeah.

Wait, um...
Kind you got?

Vanilla?

Thanks.

Really?

Get in.

Can we start over?

I'm Aaron.

Karen.

It's nice to meet you, Karen.

You, too.

Thanks for the ice cream.

Oh, my feet are k*lling me.

What the...

Next on "sistas"...

- Have a seat.
- Honored to be invited.

- What are you having?
- Anything black.

I'm just mad at every man
in the world today.

I wish I could just sh**t fire from my
boobs and burn 'em all off the planet.

Damn, that's harsh.

You not gonna ask for my number?

I am not gonna let some
horrible, miserable

wicked person without a soul
destroy my marriage.

Anyone who sleeps with
another person's husband

is clearly the devil.

I am tired of your bullshit!

- Baby...
- No, get out!

- Baby, please.
- Get out!