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01x05 - The Treasure of Hillhurst Mansion

Episode transcripts for the TV show, "Big Bad Beetleborgs". Aired: September 7, 1996 – March 2, 1998.*
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Set in the fictional town of Charterville, three "typical average kids" — Andrew "Drew" McCormick and his younger sister Josephine "Jo" McCormick, and their best friend Roland Williams — enter the supposedly haunted Hillhurst Mansion after accepting a dare from rich snobs Van and Trip.

01x05 - The Treasure of Hillhurst Mansion

Post by bunniefuu »

the right place it's kind of creepy

what's so creepy about it well the

Tombstones and the

cobwebs okay maybe it is a little creepy

but we'll be out of here soon all we

have to do is drop off this arcade game

and we're

[Music]

gone why why are you knocking on a a

tombstone look if the prej already to

say knock on a tombstone I knock on a

tombstone but I got a bad feeling about

this yeah

[Music]

right hey hey hey where you guys been

you're late you're ugly I have been

waiting all day for this game H just

give me the money and it's yours money

hey you know who you're talking to I

don't need no money if you want this

game you need money listen you give it

to me now you don't and I'll turn your

life into a living scary nightmare

if I do leave this game my supervisor

make my life a living scary nightmare

come on we're out of here let's go wait

wait wait wait wait wait wait wait you

you don't understand I need it come back

here o I'm warning you when I get a hold

of you too I'm going

to well very is G you said they bring it

they said they had to give him something

called money we're creatures from

another dimension why do we need money

to buy stuff do

how do you get it you get a job a job

yck that's disgusting forget noxy

there's got to be another way but what

if our job was something we' love to do

like stealing the money from the dim red

humans I like that it's bodaciously

brilliantly bad in fact it's toxic noxic

bad is beautiful yeah let's go to

work I think he's sick I must have some

sort of bug

what sort of

bug

e this sort of

[Music]

bug

spider there you are my little late

legged friend I've been looking all over

for

[Music]

you here we go again

[Music]

hey you guys look like ants from up

[Music]

here good thing I've got my

handkerchief wait a second where' you

get that this old thing it looks like a

treasure map what makes you say that

just no rag with a big x on

[Music]

it

[Music]

no hey this is a treasure map just like

in Treasure Island and it looks like

it's hidden in the secret room here at

hillers awesome we'll be rich huh richer

then even van and trip what do you think

flabber I think I need my handkerchief

back

[Applause]

[Music]

why

what if it's

diamonds what if it's

gold who cares as long as it's the kind

of treasure that makes you

[Music]

well Rich oh

cool but there's just one problem before

you living the Lifestyles of the Rich

and flabulous you have to find the

treasure you've got the map how hard can

it

be did somebody say

treasure I

flber I didn't say

treasure I said

pleasure it's a pleasure to see you c

fangula yeah a pleasure well what have

we here

hanky we've been looking for this ever

since old man Hillhurst died leaving

millions of a of a no things uh things

you wouldn't be interested in nice

try that's something I could sink my

teeth

and come on give it back make

me

[Music]

okay don't worry I'll pull myself

together I got it that'll teach him to

get wrapped up in other people's

plans okay we've got everything we

need pretty soon we'll be rich yeah did

I hear somebody say Rich you must be

talking about me if we were talking

about you you would have heard the words

mentally

challenge

yeah that was a good

one not

pretty soon the three of us will be

richer than even you two can imagine

that's

impossible unless we had a treasure

map a treasure map interesting not

exactly what I was thinking but all

right sure let's have it no way after we

find the treasure you two will be just

small

potatoes quit dreaming I'm the most

important potato in this town you mean

potato ahead head don't

[Music]

you let's not waste our time with these

punks yeah nice knowing you yeah right

if you like nerd hers

[Music]

right presto

I Want It All Right Now understand

listen to me will you well we'll just

see about that won't we now come in

before I split

you now what do we got here dog whistle

Keys Joy buzzer lint retainer more lint

H there must be somebody in this town

with some money who cares about a stupid

treasure we've already got all the money

we need don't you get it if we don't

grab the treasure dweebs will

so then they'll be rich they'll have a

house as big as ours o limo

[Music]

and and there goes the neighborhood

exactly well we need a plan Brainiac

okay we've got the map now we have to do

is sneak in the hillers

and and

find the treasure exactly yeah Bingo Bo

you're Quick Check

Please look tyos see what I found cute

huh look I hate

you you fool it's called the piggy bank

human store money in it hey let's open

it I don't think 14 C going to cut it

hey chill guys huh I just solved our

problems I know how we can get all the

money that we

need oh yeah how make it bad and make me

glad there's a treasure at the Hillhurst

Mansion just waiting to be discovered

but those Beetle bgs going to try and

stop us y I've already thought of that

The Beetleborgs will be too busy

fighting our old friend the mean green

cannon machine after we release him from

the comic you're bad no no you're better

than bad those Beetle BS don't have a

ghost of a chance I'm telling you I had

the map and now it's gone

what it's not in here someone must have

stolen it but who would do

that V

trip we have to get it

back

[Music]

uhoh come on out

borgs it's the green cannon machine

issue 99 he fires Rockets he's

practically indestructible when I get

through with you free you'll be buried

deeper than any

[Laughter]

treasure we're going to send them back

to the comics we have to transform into

the

beeters be

[Music]

w

looks like he's headed for the old

junkyard on the outskirts of town let's

go get him right you think this place is

a junkyard now just wait I get through

with

it are we at the hunted house yet Dudley

this isn't Driving Miss Daisy step on it

yes increase the acceleration

[Music]

please Dudley you're messing up my hand

and you're making my should all it's fit

dy I am telling my dad on

you dle pull over pull over this

in just what do you think you're doing I

call it a drive by

[Music]

looting give me the M

no

[Music]

what glass

[Music]

dismissed

look magnavore jet fighters I know what

the beetle board would do me too so

let's do

[Music]

it got visual

[Applause]

contact hey what's that wow look at that

let's get out of

here how about this one

n I'm too

[Music]

[Music]

boring on second

[Music]

thought I know it's got to be here

somewhere I followed this map to the

letter H head think I see your problem

you two are my

problem no this is your problem H so

that's it the Treasure's inside the

mansion and why didn't I I'm really

going to B him Le is good at something

even if it is making mistakes Doom

[Music]

cop who is

it it's noxic noxic who I'll noxic your

block off if you don't let me

in can you come back a little later uh

patient still contagious thank

you oh uh maybe we ought to try the back

door boy boy not so fast magob boob hey

what happened to the mean green Canon

machine you send them back to the

Comets that's where you're going we're

not afraid of you little twerps careful

a bite h

you're going to need a lot of bandages

before we get through with

you we're surrounded let's get out of

here until we me again Beetle

[Music]

Bo the

m

[Music]

good heav what

[Music]

blast we can't find a treasure with half

a why not Franken Bean uses half a

brain look if you guys are willing to

share the map we're willing share the

treasure mhm mhm yeah yeah

yeah sounds good to me

looks like this is the beginning of a

flastic

[Music]

friendship okay take two paces to the

[Music]

right

one two good now stand on one foot and

flap your wings like a chicken

is that really on the map uh uh no just

a little fasm

humor it says take 10 Paces to the

West

2 3

4 5

[Music]

well what are you waiting for come on in

let's

[Music]

go this doesn't make sense it must be

some sort of riddle what's it say before

you are two treasure chests

and you have to pick the right one

Choose Wisely and you get treasure

choose poorly and you get

none wow it looks like we'll only have

one chance I know how we can choose the

right one huh Frankie which one would

you

[Music]

open okay we'll open the other

[Music]

one

[Music]

wow try

harder hello me now remember you you

said you'd share the

wealth I don't think that's going to be

a problem we're richer than we ever

imagined

The Riches of the

earth

[Music]

SL the richest of the

earth one person's slime is another

person's

[Music]

treasure uhoh here we go

[Music]

again