01x06 - Is Toon Fur Really Warm?

[bunniefuu]

♪ Once upon a time in Toontown ♪

♪ There was a cat that had it all ♪

♪ Fortune and fame top of the game ♪

♪ Up until he hit the wall ♪

♪ Now he makes a livin' downtown ♪

♪ Walkin' on a brand new beat ♪

♪ Slippin' through the new day
Trippin' on a two-way ♪

♪ Ticket down a one way street
Beep beep beep ♪

♪ Who's that cat ♪

[siren]

♪ Crackin' up crime? ♪

♪ Stoppin' the clock ♪

[clock ticking]

♪ Hope he gets here on time ♪

[old car horn]

-♪ Let's go--
-Bonkers ♪

♪ Yeah! Totally nuts ♪

-♪ Bonkers
-No ifs, ands or but buts ♪

-♪ Bonkers
-Someone's stealin' the show ♪

♪ Can't stay, I gotta go, go! Oh, no! ♪

♪ Bonkers ♪

♪ Things gettin' outta control ♪

♪ You're caught in a trap
Ready to snap ♪

♪ Snappin' the cap
And you're takin' the rap ♪

♪ But ya can't hold back
That wacky attack ♪

♪ That's why you're still a star ♪

-♪ 'Cause you're--
-Bonkers ♪

-♪ Bonkers ♪
-Bonkers ♪

♪ Bonkers ♪

♪ Wherever you-- wherever you--
♪ Wherever you-- ♪

♪ Wherever you are ♪

♪ Bonkers ♪

[siren blaring]

[music playing on TV]

[applause and cheering]

Ooh! Alone at last.

I've missed you, darling.

I knew the prune juice diet
could never keep us apart.

Hush. Hush, my sweet.

We're together now.
That's all that matters.

Ow! Smells like the guacamole has turned.

[gasps]

[TV host] Smile, Mr. Seymore Chumsky
of Pork Chop Haven, North Dakota!

You're on "Candid Skunk"!

[giggles]

Yes, Mr. Chumsky, you thought no one knew
you were cheating on your diet.

But you were wrong.

Because this is the "Skunky Skunk Show",
and you've been "Skunked"!

-Oof!
-Hiya, Seymore!

Now I know why
they call it a pair of pajamas.

[laughs] There's at least
two of you in there.

Brrr-chi ha ha ha!

Ah-heh. Oh, that smell. [gulp]

Oh, yeah? Well, with a nose like yours,

anything would smell bad. Ha ha ha!

[giggles]

Ohh! [moaning]

-Urgh!
-[thud]

Cut it out, Seymore.
I'm the comedian on this show.

Seymore! Seymore!

-Seymore?
-[static]

[chomping] Marilyn, baby,

Why do you keep watching that video

of Skunky Skunk's last show,
over and over?

Who wants to watch that boring old cooking
show that's replaced him?

Oh, Daddy,

Skunky Skunk was my favorite.

I always thought he was pretty obnoxious,
even for a toon.

He's just putting on an act
'cause he's so insecure.

What makes you so sure?

Nobody knows insecurity better than a kid.

Oh, now, Marilyn, don't you be upset
about that nasty old Skunky show

going off the air.

You got a big birthday party coming up.

Honey, why don't you put Marilyn to bed?

Come on, Snuggle Bunny.
Let's hit the hay.

I just can't believe
Skunky would disappear

right in the middle of a show.

Oh, Honey, take it from Daddy,
Skunky's fine.

It's just one of those
weird toon publicity stunts.

Hey, I'm a cop. I know about these things.

Now, suppose you tell me
what you'd like for your birthday.

As long as it's not too expensive,
I can get you anything.

Anything?

Just name it.

I want Skunky Skunk to come
to my birthday party.

Ha ha. But, uh,

Uh, sweetheart, h-h-how, where-- who, now?

You're a cop. You know those things.

Don't you?

Oh, yeah, sure, absolutely.

[Marilyn] Ooh, thank you, daddy!

-Thank you! Thank you!
-[Lucky] Oh, that's--

-[Marilyn] Mwah! Mwah!
-[Lucky] I love you too, okay.

[Lucky clears throat] Bonkers,
I'm going to regret this,

Um, I'd like you to do me a favor.

You want me to do you a favor?!

[muttering] Yeah. Something like that.

Do you know how long I've been waiting
for you to ask me to do you a favor?

Oh, this is a spectacular day!

Of course, I'll do you a favor.
Just ask me.

All right. Don't, please.

Don't clam up now,
we're having a breakthrough here.

We're bonding!

Sit down and pipe down!

Okay, I get it.
No public displays of affection.

I got carried away.
I'm only human, you know.

No, I'm not! I'm a toon!
I can't help it!

[crash]

Cut that out!

Right. Not a sentence. Not a word.

Not a syllable. Not a sound. Not a peep.

[groans]

So, what do you want already? Spit it out.

-Uh, heh heh, yeah.
-[honk]

Look, it's the simplest thing
in the world.

Be good practice for you
in the missing persons area.

The perfect case for you,

'cause you got that "toon pull,"
if you know what I mean.

Yeah, yeah, yeah?

Find me Skunky Skunk.

Can't do it.
Wish I could, gotta clean out my desk.

Will you come out of there?

Can't. Too much to do. Place is a mess.

I said, "come out".

You know I'd do anything for you Lucky,
but Skunky Skunk?

[muffled] I wouldn't say he's obnoxious,

but when he was born,
the doctor slapped his momma.

What are you talking about?
The kids love him.

Well, sure they do.
Kids are his bread and butter.

He has to be nice to them.

Look, I promised Marilyn,
he'd be at her birthday party.

She'll be crushed if he's not.

Marilyn?

Cute, sweet, adorable,
little puddin' Marilyn?

Yeah, Mar-- you didn't think I wanted you
to find him for me, did you?

He's a toon, for crying out loud!

I'll do anything for Marilyn.
I'm on the job--

That you, Dyl? Yeah, it's me.

Tell Marilyn, Skunky's in the bag.

Sure.

She can invite the whole neighborhood.

[applause]

[TV host] Thank you, thank you.
I love you!

You were a great audience.

Another day, another soufflé!

Hope to see you all tomorrow.
Bye bye, till then.

-[bell rings]
-[director] That's a wrap, Mr. McScam.

[sighs] Glad that's over.

[Bonkers] Good!

Because I have a couple of things
to ask you.

Get lost, Bub.
No interviews on taping days.

[Bonkers] I knew I should've told him
I was a police officer.

Hello? Is anybody out there?

Ah... Ah... Ah...

Choo!

Fall-Apart, is that you?

It's me all over.

What are you doing here?

I'm the official
television studio janitor.

I empty the waste baskets, mop the floors,
and take the blame for missing articles.

[Bonkers] Sounds horrible.

Finally got tired of law enforcement, huh?

Had to get back to those
cream pies and anvils, right?

Actually, I'm trying to find Skunky Skunk,
but he's dropped right out of sight.

If you heard what I heard,
you wouldn't be surprised.

[Bonkers] What have you heard?

[Fall-Apart] I don't spread rumors,
especially the kind

that scare me to pieces
when I think about them too long, nyuh.

You better tell me what it is,

so I won't accidentally
bring it up in conversation.

Yes, you might be right. I hate surprises.

Okay, okay, okay.

[Fall- Apart whispering]
It seems that old Skunky Skunk,

might've k*lled somebody.

[Bonkers yelling]
Skunky Skunk k*lled somebody?

Skunky Skunk k*lled somebody!

[crash]

I knew this would happen, if I told you.

Sorry, F.A.

[Fall-Apart blubbering]

I love soufflé.

Come on, Fall-Apart, talk to Bonkers.

How do we find out
if this happened or not?

Well, whenever I need to know anything,

I hear it through the grapevine.

Yes, we have no shame.

[Bonkers over phone]
Lucky, I've got good news.

I know where Skunky Skunk is.

Good work. Where?

Nowhere. He's missing.
Am I making progress, or what?

That's the good news?

What am I going to tell Marilyn?
You call this doing me a favor?

But Lucky, I'm still tracking down leads.

I'm going to hear it
from the grapevine, right now.

I'll call you when I know
anything definite. Bye-bye.

Terrific! I'm gonna entrust
the happiness of my little girl,

to the future raisins of America.

[sighs] I better pull the plug
on this extravaganza,

before it gets any more out of hand.

Mwah! Mwah! Mwah!

Ah! Skunky's going to make this
the best birthday I ever had.

And you're the best dad I ever had.

Aw, honey, it's nothing, really.

So, when's he coming?

[clears throat] Well, you see, honey,

toons aren't exactly tuned into time
as tightly as we are.

But, he'll be here, won't he?

Oh, he'll be here, I guarantee it.

In fact, you'd better invite
some more kids.

We want to play this occasion up right.

Thanks, Daddy.

I'm gonna invite the whole school!

Good. Heh heh.

This isn't working out
quite the way I planned it.

[Bonkers] So, exactly
how do we go about this?

Whatever you do, don't press him.

I'm looking for Skunky Skunk.

What do you know about him?

Skunky Skunk, black with a white stripe
down the middle?

Nah, that's a highway.

I heard he insulted one
contestant too many.

Yeah, had to bury him.

Skunky had to dig a hole of his
own and pull it in after him.

So, why hasn't anyone heard about this?
The cops or the media?

Well, it seems a certain Jed McScam,
who I will not name, covered it up.

Why would he do that?

May be because they were best friends.

[all] Not!

Or maybe, because it was a all a McScam

to get rid of Skunky
and have a cooking show.

So, which is it?

[grape 1] Take your pick.

[grape 2]
Yeah, whatever keeps you out of a jam.

[all laughing]

You guys are no help at all.

Come on, Fall-Apart.

[grape 1] Hey, what is this?

[grape 2] Sour grapes for sure.

That'll teach you to question
a vine before it's time.

[grapes laughing]

[Bonkers] Wait till
Lucky hears about this.

[Lucky] What do you mean,
you can't find him?

But look at the good side,
we got a missing persons case,

we actually might be able to solve.

It may even turn out
to be a m*rder mystery.

Somebody's gonna get zapped, all right.

I promised Marilyn that Skunk
would be at her party.

Yes, we can't let Marilyn down.

I've got an idea.

What is he doing here?

Come on, Lucky. You know Fall-apart.

Knowing him and having to share space
with him, are two different things.

Now what's this idea of yours?

He'll be here in a minute.

[whistles]

[honking]

Oh, no, no, no. You can't mean that--

Honk! Honk! Beep beep!

Honk beep honk!

Toots is going to find Skunky for us.

[Bonkers] Toots is one
of the world's great sniffers.

He can find anyone or anything,
anytime, anyplace, anywhere.

Honk! Honk!

I don't know why
I didn't think of this before.

It's sheer brilliance.
Nothing is gonna stop me now.

Marilyn will get her wish,
if it's the last thing I do!

Skunky Skunk, you're mine!

-Honk! Honk!
-[groans]

[Lucky] Okay Bonkers,
you've come up with a good plan,

I knew you would, that's why I put
you in charge of this investigation.

In the police business,

foresight is what separates
the sheep from the sheepdogs.

Wow, I didn't know
they got stuck together.

Give me the leash.

I don't think
that's such a good idea, Lucky.

What are you talking about?
Who's in charge, here?

Oh, you are, Lucky, always, but
the Tootster can get kind of excited,

and, you not being a toon--

Excited? Excited is good.

I can appreciate excited.
Keeps us loose and alert.

-Give me the leash.
-[Bonkers] You're right.

Silly of me to make a big deal out of it.

That's okay, Bonkers.

Don't ever be afraid to speak out--

And they think toons are crazy?

Yeah, don't you just love him?

-[Toots] Honk! Honk! Beep beep!
-[woman screams]

[Toots] Beep beep beep!

Knew it was a mistake,
giving him the leash.

Tried to warn him.

You're right, bad move.

Honk! Honk! Beep beep!

Amateur night in Dixie.

[panting] That's a good horn.

Okay, now, don't move.

We don't want to go down
the nasty hole, do we?

-Awooooga!
-Whoa!

Honk!

-[Lucky] Heeeelp!
-[Toots] Beep beep beep!

Definitely, a gutsy move.

Better follow what's left of him.

Yeow!

[Bonkers] Lucky, are you all right?

-[Lucky gasping] Yeah!
-Honk! Honk!

Of course, I'm alright.

Easy as pie.

[sniffs]

Nothing like the excitement of a chase.

Good boy. You can go home now.

There's cold pizza in the fridge.

Beep beep!

[Lucky] What are you letting him go for?

We haven't found Skunky.

Oh, yeah? Take a snifter.

[sniffs]

Do you smell something really bad?

All together now.

Deep breath.

[all sniff]

[all] Pee-yoo! Skunky!

[Bonkers] Skunky, is that you?

[Skunky] You are so dumb.

When you have a brainstorm,
it's a light drizzle.

That's Skunky, all right.

I'd recognize those insults anywhere.

All right, Skunky,
come out in the name of the law!

All right, okay, you caught me.
Lock me up. Throw away the key.

Hide away my radiant personality
in the dark of a prison cell.

Skunky, that's our job.

Now the most important
thing we have to know is...

will you come to my
daughter's birthday party?

I don't do personal appearances.

I come off too cute and cuddly, in person.

It would ruin my reputation!

Besides, someone is
trying to k*ll me, here!

I thought you were on the run
because you k*lled someone.

Yeah, that, too.

All in all, it seems like a good idea
to stay away from public gatherings.

-Don't you think?
-[Lucky] Fine.

Well, if you'll excuse me,

I have to go and disappoint
the sweetest little girl in the world.

But boss, what about Skunky?

It's your case, now. You handle it.

Oh, Lucky, you know I'm no good
with that logic stuff, I'm a toon.

You're a cop, and you can do this.
Now, think it through.

Before anyone can be blamed for a crime...

He has to get caught? No, we did that.

Has to get a lawyer?

No, that's the worst thing you can do.

-Before anyone can be blamed for a crime,
-[bell dings]

we have to have proof
that a crime took place!

I knew you could do it. See you.

What's he talking about?

The first thing we're going to do,
is pay Seymore Chumsky a visit.

Chumsky?

But he's dead! Isn't he?

There's only one way to find out for sure.

[teeth chattering]

[Lucky clears throat] Ahem, Marilyn.

There comes a time
in every little girl's life,

when she learns that the world
just isn't on her side.

I can't say that. That's too brutal.

Ahem.

-Marilyn--
-Yes, daddy?

Oh, hi, honey.

I... what's new?

Oh, I have some great news!

The TV station heard that Skunky
is coming for my birthday,

and they're all sending camera crews!
Isn't that wonderful?

Yeah. Heh heh.

-Cool!
-[telephone rings]

Excuse me, baby,
Daddy has to answer the phone.

Hello? Is that you, Bonkers?
Never mind that,

whatever you do, don't lose that Skunk.

Where are you? I'm coming right down.

You're where?

[Bonkers] The Hollywood Cemetery, Lucky.

We're going to see if old Chumsky
is still sleeping.

Okay, boss, see you.

Lucky's coming down to help.

M-m-maybe we should wait for him.

[Skunky] No way.
Let's get this thing figured out,

before anybody messes it up.

Then again, it's nice to have someone
around who's a bigger target.

-[Skunky] There he is.
-Where? Oh, my garden seeds!

Consistent, isn't he?

[Bonkers] A padlocked coffin?

[Skunky] How do we get it open?

I can handle this. Sometimes having an ear
that locks and unlocks, comes in handy.

So, open it.

I unlocked it, why don't you open it.

It's Skunk's body, let him open it.

I'm not going to open it.

All right, all right,
let's all open it together.

[Bonkers] Ready? On three.

[creaks]

[all] Aah!

[wolf howling]

[Bonkers] I can't believe it!

I-I've never seen anything like it!

What a waste of perfectly good cookbooks.

Poor Chumsky really was trying to get rid
of his eating habit.

Yeah, and now he's trying
to get rid of me, too!

Yeah. Wonder why?

Well, that's pretty obvious, isn't it?

-[both] It is?
-Sure.

Obviously McScam, the frustrated cook,
bribed Chumsky, the frustrated dieter,

with the promise of permanent left overs,

if he'd get rid of the one toon
in the way of McScam's

premiere as television's
most popular chef. Mm-hmm.

Fall-part, how'd you figure all that out?

Hey, I'm a professional janitor.

Cleaning up other people's
messes is my business.

Ah, I guess it all is pretty obvious.

All except for one little thing.

-What?
-Who is that?

It's him! He's coming!

Please don't let him get me!
Please! Please!

Of course he's not going to get you...

[sigh]

because we're going to get him first!

[creaks, slams]

[Bonkers] Toons away!

Whaaah!

[scrapping sounds]

Oops! Hi, Lucky.

Nice night for an ambush, huh.

You're a little lively, for a dead guy.

There's only one thing I wanna know.

Can you, please, come to my little girl's
birthday party?

Of course, he is.

That's how we're gonna catch Chumsky
and the guy who put him up to all this.

[all] We are?

Mr. Big, the mind behind all this,
who our friend, Fall-Apart,

is going to lure into our little trap--

Oh, my garden seeds!

...is none other,
than the star of the show

that replaced Skunky--

[announcer] The Jed McScam show!

Tune in next week
for another celebrity recipe!

[bell rings] Wonderful show, Mr. McScam.

Oh, shut up, you miserable...

Too bad Skunky's coming back.

What did you say?

Uh, w-when?

You and I are gonna have
a little heart-to-heart talk, push-broom!

[Chumsky guzzling, slurping]

[McScam] Oh, Chumsky?

[Chumsky] Huh?

If you wanna keep your meal ticket,

we're going to have
to finish what we started.

Skunky, is not gonna come back
and kick my cooking show

out of his time slot!

Come, Seymore,

We have a birthday party to attend.

[Lucky] What do you mean,
Skunky's not coming?

But Lucky, you told me never
to put a star witness in danger.

Oh, yeah, of course, we can't do that.

What we need here, is some chowder head
in a skunk suit.

I was hoping you were going to say that.

Gosh, Skunky,

You're much bigger
than I thought you'd be.

Um, well, that's, uh,

Because, uh...

It's a TV thing.

The camera always puts
ten, a hundred pounds on you.

Everybody knows that.

But he's not on camera.

-Get me out of this.
-Right.

Come on, Skunky,
time to practice the famous Skunky fly.

[Lucky] What's a Skunky fly thing?

[Bonkers] I'll tell you on the roof.

Roof?

Um, are you sure about this?

Not to worry. I took care of everything.

See?

Poor little Skunky,

He's going to have an awful accident.

Yeah. [giggles]

Hey you don't happen to have
any pound cake on you, do you?

So, what-- I mean, so, what now?

Just don't do anything
until McScam gets here.

Huh, that I can do.

Then again--

[screaming]

Oh, dear! We've dropped the net.

Whatever will we do?

Yaah!

Ooomph!

[crash]

What a cop! You spotted him before I did!

Lucky, you're the best!

Wow! Great distance, Skunky!

Wait a minute! That's not Skunky Skunk!

When toons get bonked, they have
little birdies flying around their head.

I have them flying around my stomach.

Oh, Lucky!

Are you all right?

Happy birthday!

Oh, Daddy! [laughs]

You're such a kidder!

[laughing]

You didn't have to go to all this bother.

I can understand
if Skunky's too busy to come.

I'm a big girl, remember?

You certainly are.

Skunky said to give you this
and apologized for not coming in person.

You'll always be my favorite,

even though we'll never meet.

Say...

you're pretty warm.

What am I talking about?

It's just a doll.

Nope-eroo!

It's caaandid Skunk!

Skunky, it's you!

[Bonkers] You see, Lucky?

It all worked out.
You asked me to find Skunky,

and we found Skunky,
and now Marilyn's happy.

Anytime you need a favor,
you know where to come.

Anything at all, just ask me. You got it.

Anything in the world.
Just name it! Just name it!

Bonkers, I'm gonna ask you one more favor.

Yes! Yes! Yes! What? What? What? Anything!

Don't do me any more favors.

Aw, Lucky, you old softie, you!

[theme music playing]