01x08 - Going Up/Wait Till Your Father Gets Even/Never Too Late to Loon

[bunniefuu]

You're lucky. It's Plucky. I'm absolutely

ducky. Other shows seem yucky now that

Plucky's on the air. I'm wacky. I'm

quacky. He's an egomaniac-y. Hampton

plays the lucky of this stuff

extraordinaire. Who knows the way to

close his endless babbling beak?Drop an

angle down upon his feathery physique.

Toast him. Roast him. The show will still

be boasting. It's the Pucky Duck Show and

it's on each week His antics are

frantic At times he gets romantic My

talent's so gigantic It'll burst from

your TV The writers are hackers The

artists all with crackers The actors are

yackers But don't complain, it's free

Rocky goes to Acme Lune to learn to be a

star There are other tootsters at the

school But who cares who they are?So

enjoy, don't be coy And don't fall for a

decoy It's the Pucky Duck Show, come and

laugh aloneI also

wrote this song.

Okay, Han. We're all done shopping.

Now, what would you like to do?I want to

go on the elevator. I want to push the

button. You want to go on the elevator,

darling?Yes, sir. I want to go on the

elevator. Okay, dear. Let's do

that.

No, I push the button. No, you push the

button. I push the button. Now your turn,

my turn. I push the button. Okay,

okayI push the button.

I push it. I push it again. I push it

again and again and again and again.

Don't overdo it, Plucky. Once is enough.

Elinator go down the hole. Here

we go, son. Watch your step.

No, I scared. But, darling, there's

nothing to be afraid of. No, I scared. It

won't bite. No, I scared.

Come along, dear.

Pick me up, pick me up, pick me up, pick

me up. Let's

go to the 8th floor. Do you see a number



your turn. My turn. All right,

you pushed number eight. What a

big boy. I pushed eight. I pushed eight.

I pushed eight. Yes, you did, huh

Elilator go up. That's right,

son. Elilator go up.

You got it. Elilator go up.

Yes. Elilator go up.

Yeah. And

here we are. I want to do it again.

You do?Yes, sir. I want to do it again. I

want to push the button. Okay,

one more time. Here we go. It's my

turn. It's not your turn. It's my turn.

I push the button. I get in and get in

again. Lovely.

Elevator go down. Elevator go

down. That's right. Elevator go down.

Okay. All right, Plucky, we

have to go now. I don't want to do it

again. But now it's time to go

home. No, go home. I want to go on

the elevator. I want to do it again. Next

time. I want to do it again. I want to do

it again. Waaaaaaaaa! Waaaaaa! Waaaaaa!

Waaaaa!

Next time, I promise. Wanna do

it again! Waaaaa!

Wanna do it! Ohh

I want to do it again. I want to go on

the elevator. My turn. No, you push the

button. I push the button.

My turn, not your turn. I push the

button. Not your turn, my turn.

I push A! I push

A! I get in and get in again.

It's my turn. It's not your turn. I push

the button. It let it go up. It

let it go up. It let it go up.

My elevator. Not your elevator.

My elevator. Not your elevator.

Mine.

Elevator go down.

Up you go, Plucky.

You're not Plucky! Hi, lady.

I need to go down the hall.

Uh oh, bottom of the

hole.

Number one, who?My

elevator. Not your elevator. My

elevator. Let go, kid. I pushed

the button. No, you pushed the button. I

pushed the button. Let go! It's

my turn. It's not your turn. It's myturn.

My turn! I push the button!

I pushed the button.

I pushed the buttons again.

And a little go down. And a little stop.

And a little go up. A little

stop. And a little go down. A

little stop. A

little go up. A little stop.

Lucky, thank goodness! I was

so worried!

I pushed the button.

Elevator down the floor.

Welcome, kiddies, for a selection of

cartoons so ghoulishly

gruesome, we can only call them

Toons from the Crypt.

I've brought out some real screamers

tonight, starting off with this

blood-curdling tale of a panicked pig,

which I callWait till your

father gets even.

Kee, Hampton, you're a natural. It's

just beginner's luck. No, really. You're

the best jax player I've ever seen.

I wish I could handle the ball the way

you do. Magic.

Golly, I'm really not doing anything

special. Hey, do you think we could play

one more game?I'll let you have my halo.

Oh, I couldn't take-- Oh, well, if you

couldn't take it, we could, um, what's

the word?Uh, bet for it?

You be... dabble?Oh,

no, no no, just a friendly little

wanger. Um, you know, my halo

for your,Your dad's bottle cap

collection. Dad's collected them since he

was a kid. They're priceless. He'd be...

really angry with me. Sure,

I understand. You're probably just saying

that so I won't lose my halo and go home

crying. You're a pal.

Uh, no, it's just... Then we have a

test! Ladies and gentlemen, the

game is jazz. Winner take all.

I win. Thanks.

Just call me a lucky duck. Just call

me a lucky duck. Just call me a

lucky duck. And I'll call you a

shocker.

How can I face my dad?

He'll be so disappointed.

That's what I get for gambling. Now I

know how Pete Rose feels.

At least my mom will

understand.

You did what?

Wait till your father gets

home. Ohh I'm

doomed. I

lost your bottle cap collection. Can you

forgive me?

Have you any coal, any server,

tupperware?No,

I've nothing at all. Nothing?

How about your self-respect?

Not even that. You see,

I've dishonored my dad.

Horrors. It's true.

I gambled with his trust. I

died lost. Even in the

wild, we have honor among

thieves. You have shamed your father,

and you shall be punished.

Roast him! I say, roast

him! No!

Dad. Now,

Wade, don't be too hard on him. Now, now,

Winnie. I know what I'm doing. Well, he

feels bad enough already. Just let me

take care of this.

Son, can I have a word with you?

Please forgive me, please. I'll

never gamble again. I promise. I don't

want to get roasted by boars. Whoa,

son. Those bottle caps meant a lot to me.

I was hoping to give them to you, just

like my father gave them to me.

Let's hope you've learned your lesson,

son.

Say, this new collection is looking

better than the first. Ready, men?

Tops off, bottoms up.

Yes, I know it's not the fiendishly

frightening finale we usually run in

these stories. For Hampton all ended

happily, but Plucky's folks took a

slightly harsher view of his

gambling.

But that's another story.

Uh-oh. I overslept again. Oh, hi,

Tootsters. Exam day at Acme Loo. I got a

motor.

Hey, Pookie. You ready for the big test?

T-t-test?What test?Cartoon

math. Weight rations of falling anvils,

density per inch of bonking mallets. Ooh,

it's a k*ller. You're telling

me?Well, good luck, old big

face. I'm doomed.

Oh, what a loon I am Oh,

what a loon I am

Shirley, sweetheart, your

dream duck needs a small favor. No, like

I won't help you cheat on your math test,

OK?That's what I get for asking a mind

reader. Oh, you got to help me, Cheryl.

You can channel Einstein or Newton or or

some other genius into my head. Then I'll

pass for sure. Plucky. Last week you

told me channeling was New Age nonsense.

It's a term of endearment.

Please, you got to help me.

Get invisible, plucky! Your whining is

stressing out my aura to the max, you

lunch meat!

I'm not gonna give up.

Hey, uh, Loom Girl, any guess as to what

today's mystery meal is?Ew, like this

requires telekinetic communication,

Buster. I'll have to, like, meld with the

meal. Okay, it's coming. I am...

I am.. poultry. Let's do

lunch. Ew. I just lost my appetite. Uh,

Shirley, you look beautiful tonight.

I have an ache in my heart and a hole in

my head that needs to be filled. So how

about channeling a little Einstein up

here, Toots?Like, let me whisper

something to you, darling. I'm out of

here.

How about just a peek at old Sonny'sbrain?

I hear that old guy Einstein was pretty

smart.

Couldn't you channel just a little bit of

Einstein?How about his mustache?Ohh

All right, I'll do it! Anything to get

you out of my hair! Oh, joy,

Rapture! I'm gonna be a genius!

I call upon the spirit world to answer my

friend. Channel the genius of Einstein

into this duck's pea brain.

The size of the death home is in direct

proportion to the number of freeloading

in-laws staying at your house. What are

you talking about?Einstein's

theory of relativity, of course.

Geek me out. Uh-oh. It's

test time. Pardon me for our line.

This will be a, how do you say, slam

dunk.

I am

slapping a hamburger with a frank foot on

the sour pot. Oh, like Mondo

negatory vibes. Who's inventing my space?

Plucky, school's over. What are you still

doing in there?I'm

in detention, and it's all your fault. My

fault?Yeah, you told me I had Einstein's

genius, but I still failed the math test.

You do have Einstein's genius or some

junk. I just forgot to tell you that when

Einstein was a kid, he flunked math, too.

Bye. Ugh, do algebra.

I've been snookered.