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01x12 - Take Me to Your Leader

Episode transcripts for the TV show, "Road Rovers". Aired: September 7, 1996 – February 22, 1997.*
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One year prior, in Socorro, New Mexico, Professor Shepherd was forced to relinquish his experimental transdogmafier technology to General Parvo in exchange for having his kidnapped dog Scout returned to him, but Parvo refused to do so and destroyed his laboratory.

01x12 - Take Me to Your Leader

Post by bunniefuu »

Bark and scratch and Frisbee catch and

presidential pets. That's us. Changing to

the canines who drive suit up cars and

jets. Coming through. Took a sniffing

toilet sip and soaring through the sky. I

like it. They can do it with the view.

And who says dogs can't fly?Not me.

Feeding, crash and k*ll a scratching

vehicle and smoke. Jason racing

down the road.

Is his bots worse than his bite?I'm

permission Shag is strong from head to

toe A cow through and through Well, well,

well Muscle stack, it's gonna blow He's

sure a screw or two They fight for right

both day and night In every episode Let's

roll! Now it's time to hit the road Go,

Brothers!

Captain Zachary Storm, please rise.

You have been found guilty of treason

against the United States. The justice

system is a conspiracy. You have no

authority over me. I hereby sentence you

to federal prison for life with no

possibility of parole.

This is just a minor setback. Bailiff,

take him away.

No, not me!

No! As UFO sightings continue, today at

Camp David, the president and other world

leaders have gathered to review the

prices. According to our data,

there's no clear pattern to these

sightings. Reminds me a bit of those

mysterious crop circles we have, except

they don't go around disintegrating

people.

It's OK, Hunter. It's OK. Now, as of

this morning, NATO forces have been put

on full alert. Mr. President, Germany's

military is standing by. You can count on

us. Her Majesty's armed forces are ready

to assist in any way. Russia's Ministry

of Defense is prepared to crush any

threat. Well. If we're unable to

remain neutral, then the Swiss Guards

will be ready. Good. At tomorrow's press

conference, we'll announce the formation

of a planetary peacekeeping alliance. I

suggest that we all get a chunky lunky

burger, maybe a large fry and a malt, and

then sack out. What'd he say?Hey, even

you, boy. Huh

Keep rolling. Keep rolling.

What is it?You better stay back, Mr.

President. We'll take care of this.

Sir, I suggest you and the others

evacuate. No, we need to put a stop to

this once and for all. Hillary?

Oh, she's not here.

No, stay, Hunter. I'll be fine.

I do not have a good feeling about this.

It's OK, honor. What do they want, sir?

Unconditional surrender.

We've been waiting over 5 hours for the

press conference to begin, and there is

still no word from the world leaders on

how they plan to respond to last night's

alien ultimatum. Ha! You've got

mad! I have proof that England is

covertly involved with these aliens in a

grab for world power. You dare

accuse my country?Your country's behind

this. This is an insidious

British-American covenure.

Now, it is a Swiss spying for world

domination.

Bolshoi, all of you are conspiring to

overthrow my government.

If you persist with these accusations, I

will be forced to declare w*r on all of

you. Then w*r it is!

Rovers, this is a red alert. It's time

to save the world.

Rovers, we're on the brink of a disaster

that could destroy the planet. The

leaders of the world are talking w*r.

Everyone should listen to my owner. He's

the only one making sense. Duh,

nonsense. Watch your tongue,

Snowball. You should talk, weird boy.

I'm gonna bite you so hard. Get off my

tail. Quit hounding me. Stop bickering.

We're trying to stop a w*r, not start

another one. Rovers, this crisis is

related to that UFO. I want you to track

it down. Let's hit the skies.

Satellite indicates UFO last spotted near

Greatest Lakes. What do these aliens want?

Well, they may be after our planet, or

maybe they're after our brains. Oh, even

mine?Sure, it's the little things that

count. Or they might be after our food.

Shack says now it's personal.

Whoa!close encounter are the

worst kind.

Colleen, I need your help. Everyone else

abandon ship. Whatever happened to women

and children first?Another cliche bites

the dust.

You sure you know how that pup works,

answer?Nope, but it's worth a try. And

if it doesn't work, how long can you hold

your breath?Not long enough.

You never learned how to doggy paddle?

What a shame for both of us.

Lucky for us, comrade, we have chutes. Uh,

I didn't say it was good lucky for us.

Easy, but I give bad guys big chips.

Dad will learn them. Oops.

They are fast learners.

Move along.

Hey, stop shopping. Look what

Cat tracked in. Don't start with me.

I'm feeling a tad cranky. Well,

wellIt seems the planet Earth has

truly gone to the dogs. Put

the prisoners through the neural brain

scrambler to ensure their loyalty to me.

Just like the leaders of their little

world. Please, Mr. Alien, sir, I beg

of you, don't scramble my brain. It's so

teeny-tiny, it wouldn't even make a

decent omelet. Please!

Engage that ship, and this time, I'll

biggerate it! Boy, am I glad that bump

worked. I'll say.

Faster, Runtie-Wuntie!

They are mine. Commander, sensors are

picking up something new.

I would not have predicted this.

How's it lagging, space rovers?Oil

systems current. Engaging laser

launchers. Come again?

Initiating retrieval maneuvers. Hey,

you're from another country, aren't you?

Ready, auntie?You bet. Catch.

We need reinforcements.

What we are about to do should not happen

to a dog. It won't. It'll happen to

them. Muzzle it.

Cold w*r was never like this. Oh, I'm

feeling a little dyspepsia.

Yo, monkey boy, leaving the party already?

Who do they send to stop me?Not the FBI,

not the CIA. They send months

of grave tactical error. Storm!

But you're dead. You're a dead alien

ghost zombie thingy. That's what I wanted

everyone to think. He wasn't vaporized

after all. It was special effects. Oh,

cool. Did I LM to him?Well, that must

have cost a fortune. I'm

glad you liked the illusion, but the

show's over. You see, the captain is

going down with the ship, and so are

you. The ship will self-destruct

in 30 seconds. Yet another

unexpected twist. Bummer.

All pushies bitten and accounted for.





Hurry, exile. If we don't warp out of

here now, we're toast. Do you like your

toast with jam or honey?Uh, jam. And

don't call me honey. Four, three,

two, one. What

about all of Storm's mercenaries?They'll

be picked up by the maybe. To the

power of the pack.

Now, where were we?Captain Zachary

Storm, once again, you've been found

guilty of treason against the United

States. I sentence you to federal prison

for a double life sentence with no

possibility of parole. Dream on,

Judge. I guarantee you I'll eclipse

everything I've ever done before.

Then the whole world will know the storm

can never be stopped. Never!

Couldn't happen to a nicer maniac.

And again, he might not be at the top of

the list. I love you

most. We have

peace on Earth for a while at least.

Thanks to you, Rovers. Cool. This

calls for a group hug.

Where in the Road Rover manual does it

say we have to do this?The footnote on

page 227. Oh, fine

paint gets me every time.

Finally, the nightmare is over.

Now if we could just calm things down in

Bosnia.

Sweet dream, Shag

Enough biting, Litz. It's time for bed.



There. All done. Now it's off to bed,

dear.

We'll play some more tomorrow, Hunter.

Right now, all I want to do is get over

that white water thing and get somesleep.

They'll learn the hard way.

Not even prison bars can stop me from

controlling the world. Excuse me. What do

you mean?Just watch the moon, buddy boy.

Yeah, it's all happening now.

I don't understand. When the lunar

eclipse is at its apex, the w*r will

begin. But how?I

planted a post-hypnotic suggestion in the

minds of the world's leaders. Oh,

no. They thought they could stop

me.

Stand by for verification codes. But

Mr. President, these codes authorize the

immediate activation of our missiles.

Correct, General. Now do it.

Prepare for launching. You heard

me correctly. We're not neutral anymore.

Complete obliteration. The time

is a time.

Hunter, wake up. HuhColleen, you

too. Blitz.

Shag

Dream about hydrants some other night,

ShagExile, this is a full Road Rover

alert. The world leaders are about to set

off a full-scale w*r. You need to stop

them before the eclipse is complete.

No, Hunter. There's no time to

transdogmify into road rovers. You've got

to do it on your own. There's no other

way.

Receiving emergency message for strategic

m*ssile launch. Begin verification codes.

Bravo. Echo. Tango.

Hey, cut it out, Hunter. What was the

answer?Hey!

Yvonne, Piccadilly, Abby.

Colleen, what's wrong with you?This won't

do at all. Krasny, Svenja,

Sobaka.

Exile, you will be sent back to Siberia

for this.

Zurich, Geneva, Lucerne.

Yeah, doggy breath. Doggie break.

I'm afraid that's not part of the code,

sir. Sieben, Rein,

Eint, Linden. Ah,

Blitz! Mein hiding!

Connor, knock it off!

Whoa! We need

the final code for the launch if we're to

proceed, Sir. Launch?

What am I doing?Abort. Cancel

launch immediately. I haven't.

Abort the launch. Bolshoi,

start missiles now. We're in neutral

again. How's the blisklag?

I don't fully understand what happened

last night, Hunter, but hoo-wee! I

think you saved the world from total

destruction. You're a genuine hero.

If it wasn't for you, Colleen, I shudder

to think what might have happened. You

are true comrade exile. Donke

Shan Blitz. I think.

Eat up, Shan. You deserve it.

Deep inside, every dog is a road rover.

You're good, good dogs. Ohh

I'll be back. You'll see. What

doesn't k*ll me makes me stronger.

Besides, old soldiers never die. They

keep coming back for more.

Excuse me. Could you please keep it

down?We're in the middle of a meeting.

Now, Spider, you'll control Russia.

Flee. China is yours. And

c*ck, you can have Iran. You

can't split up the world. It's mine to

rule! Mine! You can't rule the

world. You're not a bank. You're not

going to rule, I am. No, it is

I who shall rule the world, yes! You

can't! You can't! It's mine! No rule! No,

no, no, no