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I'll Be Right There (2023)

Comedy Movie Collection.
(Buddy/Dark/Black/Parody/Screwball/Slapstick/Sketch/Satire/Spoof/Mock/Comedians/etc.)

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Comedy Movie Collection.

I'll Be Right There (2023)

Post by bunniefuu »

["Stay High" playing]

I already feel

Like doing it again, honey

'Cause once you know

Then you know

And you don't wanna go

Back to wherever it is

That you come from, yeah

I just want to stay high

With you

'Cause where I come from

Everybody frowns

And walks around

With that ugly thing

On their face

And where I come from

We work hard and grind

And hustle all day

Yes, we do

There comes a time

[man] Good morning.

At night

Where we get to play

And we smile and laugh

And jump and clap

And yell and holler

And just feel great

I just want to stay high

With you

With you, with you, baby

So don't question

My state of mind

I'm doing wonderful

Just fine, thank you

Thank you

Everything is everything

And everything is beautiful

How did you get like that?

See, all I do

Is keep it cool

And don't worry

'Bout what...

[clock ticking]

-Are you okay?

-I'm nervous.

Yeah, that's normal.

Can I hold your hand?

-It's a little sweaty.

-Oh, I don't care about that.

I've had a good life,

haven't I?

Yes, you have

and it's not over yet.

I had a dream that the doctor

told me that I was gonna die.

A dream doesn't make it so.

Most of my dreams come true.

That's ridiculous.

You're not acknowledging

the power of my dreams.

[doctor] Ladies, sorry

to keep you waiting.

It has been a little crazy

out there this morning.

Is it lung cancer?

Grace, please.

I mean, I know

it's lung cancer.

I started smoking when I was 14.

What else could it be?

I'm really sorry that I wasted

everybody's time.

-Mom, wait. No, Mom, please!

-Grace!

Mom, please!

Well, 68's a pretty good run.

I mean, I drank. I smoked.

I... I ate pretty much

anything I wanted to.

There's no reason for anyone

to feel sorry for me.

I was one of the lucky ones

until I got this lung cancer.

Mom. Mom, please

let the doctor speak, okay?

Grace, please.

You don't have lung cancer.

I know that there's something

wrong with me.

A person knows their own body

better than any doctor

ever will.

There is something wrong.

What is it?

Well, Grace,

this is a little complicated,

so I'm going to walk you

through it.

-You have leukemia.

-Oh?

Now, this is a very

serious disease,

but you actually

don't have any symptoms yet.

Well?

We will monitor your

blood levels every six months,

but there is

a very real chance

that you might die

of something else entirely

before the leukemia

ever presents itself.

Eh...

Thank you.

How are you doing, Mom?

You okay?

I'm still processing it all.

We will get through this.

This is not a death sentence.

Okay.

What... What are you doing?

I was going to quit

if it was lung cancer.

This-- Well, smoking is how

you got leukemia, Mom.

[Wanda sighs]

You heard what he said.

I'll probably die

from something else

before this ever gets me.

He said you might.

What are you doing?

I need something to comfort me

after what I just heard.

I am here to comfort you, Mom.

That is why I am here.

You can't just quit smoking

after 50 years.

A shock to the system like that

could give me a stroke.

Do you want to give

your mother a stroke?

Would you let me make you

some lunch?

You're getting too skinny.

That is not true.

Or we could go

for some ice cream.

I don't have time today, Mom.

Hey, Mom, you're not fooling

anybody, okay?

Can you get rid of that?

Get rid of what?

Is Sarah still

driving you crazy?

You know, she's just stressed.

Well, make her go down

to City Hall and get married.

She wants a proper wedding.

Well, she should

have thought of that

before she was

eight months pregnant.

I have everything under control,

don't you worry.

Just come in for a quick

slice of my pecan pie.

I have to get to Mark's

therapy session.

This is something

you do together?

No, not usually,

but Mark says the doctor

wants me there today.

Why?

I guess I'll find out.

You should stop

paying his rent.

Mom, what good would it do

if he was homeless?

-He could move in with you.

-He doesn't want to do that.

-Well, then he could

move in with me.

-Yeah, that'd be great.

Sit around playing poker all day

with you and your gals.

There's a lot of life lessons

you can learn playing poker.

Mom, he has addiction issues.

I, I-- I don't think we need

to add gambling to that list.

It's not gambling

if you know how to play.

It's leukemia.

-[Tess] Hurray!

-[Mary] Oh! You said

it was lung cancer for sure.

-Turns out you can't always

trust your dreams.

-[cell phone buzzing]

[Tess] Let's go to the casino

and celebrate.

[Grace] Yes, let's do that.

Mom, I got to go.

What? Wait a minute,

wait a minute.

-I thought I was

making you a sandwich.

-Next time.

Well, don't let those kids

run you ragged, Wanda.

Okay. I will check in

on you later.

[Grace] Okay.

Hey, Mark. Hi. Listen.

Uh, I'm running a little late.

I'm sorry.

There's an emergency

with your sister,

and I'm not going to have time

to pick you up, okay?

So I'll just meet you there.

-Sweetie.

-Mom.

Honey. Sweetheart,

what happened?

-It's been over ten hours.

-What has?

It's probably because

of all the junk food I eat

or because, you know, the shocks

on Eugene's truck are so bad.

Sometimes when he's driving,

it's like you might as well

be riding a horse.

Honey, what?

He still wants to have sex,

like all the time.

And I just, I know

that's what's done this.

Done what?

This.

What, honey?

I don't feel anything.

That's because the baby

hasn't kicked in over ten hours.

Oh, Sarah, honey.

Oh, Mom, I k*lled my baby.

I k*lled my own baby.

Sarah, it's okay. Shh...

It's okay?

How could you--

How could you say that?

It's not gonna be okay.

Why don't we just wait to see

what the doctor says, honey?

-I am sure--

-Mom, it's been ten hours.

Ten hours is a long time.

Sweetheart, babies sleep.

They sleep a lot.

-Where is Eugene?

-Um, he's at work.

I left him a message,

and I told him

that the wedding is off.

The dress is almost finished.

We have the church.

You know you want

this wedding, honey.

I'm only marrying Eugene

because I got pregnant.

And now that I've k*lled

my own baby...

Honey, please stop--

...it doesn't really

matter anymore.

[sobbing]

-While I was waiting for you...

-Mm-hmm?

I made a list of 25 things

that I should be doing

rather than sewing booties.

-You don't sew.

-It's a metaphor.

All right, sweetheart,

why don't I just go

see what's taking

so long, okay?

You stay here,

and I'll be right back, okay?

Oh, no, Mom. Mom. Mom.

I think I did something

really wrong here, and...

'cause I gotta do

everything wrong, don't I?

Sweetheart, sweetheart.

It's really your fault

because...

you never taught me and Mark

how to be real people,

to live a real life.

And now I'm supposed

to raise a littler person.

And it doesn't matter anymore

because my baby is...

[exhales deeply]

Are you okay? You okay?

Oh... [chuckles]

[laughs] Oh, Mom.

There is your strong boy.

Now he's just showing off.

[Wanda laughs]

Okay. Let's go. It smells

like sick people in here.

All right, sweetheart.

You want to call Eugene,

tell him that the wedding

is back on?

Oh, I've already canceled it,

like, a dozen times.

I'm sure he's used to it

by now.

Are you glad

that you had me and Mark?

What kind of question is that?

Even after we turned out

like the way we did?

A crackhead

and an unwed mother?

Listen, Mark is doing

much better.

We're about to get you wed.

-And you like Eugene?

-Yes. He's a good man.

He's gonna make a good father,

good husband.

He's kind of dumb, isn't he?

[laughs] Eugene is not dumb.

I thought that

if I married somebody

that wasn't all that smart,

that I could get him to do

anything I wanted him to,

but it's not really

working out like that.

Listen, you want a partner

to go through life with.

Eugene has a good heart.

You know that.

Hey, don't tell him all that

stuff I said inside there.

No, honey, of course not.

And the baby's fine.

That's really all that matters.

Yeah, that and having

the perfect wedding.

And the wedding.

I know you think

this wedding is stupid.

-No, I do not.

-You might be right.

I'm so pregnant that when

I tossed the bouquet,

the baby might poke an arm out

and try to catch it.

Listen, your father and I

are very happy

to put this wedding together

for you, honey.

Oh, yeah, because I see Dad

doing so much.

Listen, he's paying

for half of it.

As long as he does that,

I'm happy to do the rest.

Watch your feet.

Great. Aye yai yai.

Okay. Hold on,

let me give you a hand.

-I'm fine. I've got it.

I've got it.

-[Eugene] Sarah!

-Sarah, what's going on?

-What are you doing here?

I got your message.

I couldn't understand

a word that you said.

You sounded really panicked.

What happened?

Nothing. I just said

that the baby was dead

and I'd never marry you

in a million years.

-Okay, honey, I got--

-All right. But are you okay?

The baby's fine. I'm fine.

Wedding's back on.

Don't be such a drama queen.

-Honey, I got to go.

I'll see you later.

-I love you, Mom. Bye.

Oh, if you're

off work, though,

could you go

to that place I like

and get me that meatball sub?

-See you, Eugene.

-All right, Wanda.

Bye, Wanda.

I'm sorry. The receptionist said

I could just come right in.

Sure. It's fine.

Wow. You got your hair cut.

I didn't get my hair cut.

Yeah. I can see

you got it cut.

I didn't get it cut.

I cut it myself.

-Wow. Why?

-Um, I'm sorry.

It kept getting in my eyes.

-Can we, um...

-[Wanda] Okay.

-Yes.

-Where were you?

Uh, there was an emergency

with your sister. Sorry.

I'm sure that that's not true.

She was at the hospital,

Mark, so...

I'm sure that she thought that

there was an emergency,

-but I'm sure it was nothing.

-Okay, I'll tell you what.

Let's focus.

You know, I had to ride

my neighbor's bike to get here.

Okay, well, it's a nice day

outside.

I'm sure a bike ride

probably did you some good.

-[Wanda chuckles]

-Did me some good.

Mom, listen, look,

I agree to come to these.

Most of the time,

I'm talking to Dr. Sherman

about my abandonment

issues or whatever.

And then I have to come in here

today and explain to him

that my mom is abandoning me

for my sister.

And this happens

over and over again.

Like there was the time

two months ago

where I needed you,

and you had to drive to Sarah's

to go scrape up a dead squirrel

that was three streets down

from where she lives.

But just knowing that its

flattened body's out there

makes Sarah hyperventilate,

and then she can't concentrate

on the cooking shows

she watches all day,

even though she doesn't cook.

Okay. She likes food, Mark.

Hey, I like oxygen.

I don't watch a channel

devoted to air all day.

Mark, she was at the hospital.

I had to go and check

to see if she was all right.

Mom, I had to ride

my neighbor's

12-year-old daughter's

bike here.

Okay, Mark,

we are both here now,

so how about we don't waste

any more of Dr. Sherman's time?

-Thank you. Thank you, Wanda.

-I'm sorry.

And it's so interesting

that you actually, uh,

uh, said it exactly like that.

Uh, wh-- How do you mean?

I've decided, uh,

that Mark and I

are going to end his therapy

as of today.

Oh! Okay.

That's good news, isn't it?

Well, we're here, Mark and I,

um, to talk about the issues

that he has to move past

so that he has a chance

to have the best life

that he possibly can.

-Yeah. Okay.

-Okay.

So, Wanda, let me ask you...

did Mark spend five years

in the Army

fighting in Afghanistan?

Why would you waste

all of that time, Mark?

You have been seeing this guy

for more than six months.

He got paid.

I don't care

about Dr. Sherman.

Don't you want to get better?

-There's nothing wrong with me.

-Oh!

Okay, I've had a few meltdowns

in the past.

In a crowded pool,

at a crowded mall.

I just don't like crowds

that much.

Mark, don't.

Give me this thing.

Mom, I'm fine.

The medication is working.

Why are you so mad?

Because you only get this skinny

when you stop taking

your medication.

-Can I drive?

-You haven't answered

my question.

You didn't ask a question.

You made a statement.

Have you stopped taking

your medication, Mark?

Can I drive? I want to show you

something nice.

No, I've got a million things

I got to do.

You have time to see something

nice. You'll like this.

[Wanda] If I found

another therapist,

would you agree to go?

-Yeah, sure.

-You promise not to lie to them?

I'd say yes, but I'd hate

to have to lie to you.

We could go together.

What, like couples therapy?

Mark, please

take this seriously.

Let's just enjoy

this drive, please.

Where are we going?

-I told you, it's a surprise.

-I don't love surprises.

What are we doing here?

-[Mark] I work here.

-Doing what?

[Mark] Come inside.

Inside.

-[dogs barking]

-[house alarm beeping]

Hey, boys.

Mom, this is Buddy,

Mazzy, Arturo.

-[keypad beeping]

-[alarm stops]

They are the best.

Hey, guys, bathroom?

Whose house is this?

Come on, boy.

It's great, right?

Go on.

Yeah, so it's not technically

a real, real job,

but I get to stay here for free

while I take care of the dogs.

For how long?

Two months starting today.

So, who actually lives here?

How do you know them?

You worry too much, Mom.

Yes, I am your mother.

That's my job.

Well, I've been good

for a year or so.

A year?

Nine months, give or take.

[sighs] So why did you cut

your hair so short?

There's ticks out here.

I thought it'd be easier

with short hair.

You don't believe me.

Well, at the doctor's,

you said you cut your hair

because it was getting

in your eyes.

Yeah, that was a lie.

-So then this is the truth?

-Yes.

Why do you make them

sound the same?

All right, Mom, I'm fine.

I'm actually doing really good.

Look.

Hey, can you return that bike

to my neighbor's house?

Sure. Who is it?

I don't know. Some guy.

So-- Some guy? All right,

he'll be easy to find.

You know I'm horrible

with names.

He lives above me in seven.

He said

he knows you, actually.

How does he know me?

I don't remember.

I'm also terrible

at remembering

the things

that people tell me.

What is it you think

you're good at, Mark?

[scoffs] We'll see.

[light guitar music playing]

[sighs]

[guitar music continues]

[train whistle blowing]

[train bell dinging]

[sighs]

Hey, Wanda.

Hi. Yes, I'm returning this

for Mark.

Oh, oh, you brought

back Kimmy's bike.

Thank you.

Thank you very much.

But you didn't have to

bring it all the way up here.

We usually

leave it downstairs.

You don't...

you don't remember me.

-No, uh... No, I do. Kind of.

-Kind of.

Uh, no, I'm sorry. Not really.

I'm sorry. I don't.

Albert Newman

from high school.

Come on. Same face.

Litt-- Little Albert Newman?

[stammering] You were like

a stick figure in high school.

Smaller, yeah.

It looks like you're wearing,

like, body armor or something.

Well, I got divorced

a few years ago,

and, you know, I didn't know

what to do with myself,

so one day, I decided

to go to the gym.

Ah! And you ate

all the weights.

[both laugh]

-You are still funny.

-Me?

Yeah, yeah. You were very funny

back in high school.

-I was?

-Yeah, you were.

-[smoke alarm beeping]

-Oh, hold on, hold on.

Oh! [groans]

What do you got

going on in there?

Whoo!

Kimmy's school, you know,

they have a parent come in

and, you know,

cook a meal for the kids.

So, I thought that I would,

I would bake something,

you know, some kind

of dessert.

But I keep burning everything

or everything breaks apart,

you know.

I-- I don't know what

I was thinking. I can't cook.

I don't know

what I'm going to do.

Wait, when are you supposed

to do this?

Tomorrow, after my shift

at the firehouse.

All right, don't look

so panicked.

It's going to be A-okay.

I have a plan.

[light music playing]

-Hello.

-[Sophie] Hey.

I hope it's okay

that I'm waiting for you here.

Uh, don't you have a class

to teach?

I was supposed

to have office hours,

but I stuck a note on the door

that there was an emergency.

Oh, what was the emergency?

The emergency is that

I needed to see you.

No one's watching.

This is a very nosy

neighborhood.

-Believe me.

-Okay. So, let's go inside.

But I have to get ready

for work, so no funny stuff.

-Okay.

-Okay.

No, quit it.

Oh, my goodness.

That was amazing.

You're f*cking amazing.

Thank you.

It's like, whatever

my body wants,

your mouth and your fingers

anticipate it.

[Wanda chuckles]

And it's all connected.

And it sends me

higher and higher

until I feel like

I'm going to pass out.

But then you bring me back

into my body again,

and I feel every

wave and shimmer,

and I feel like I'm gonna

melt through this bed,

through the floor,

down into the center

of the earth.

That's-- that's so vivid.

Do you not feel the same way?

No, I do. I do.

I just don't have, um,

as many words as you, I guess.

-You don't need them.

-[Wanda chuckles]

How come we never go

to your house?

I don't mind coming here.

I know, but I've never seen

where you live.

My place is a mess.

Oh, I'd like to see

where you live.

Maybe, I don't know,

meet some of your friends.

My friends are the worst.

You would hate them.

Then why are you friends

with them?

They're not even--

They're just people who teach

in the same program I'm in.

I'm not even going to see them

very much longer anyway

because I just heard back

from BU.

Why are you just telling me

this now? What did they say?

They offered me the job.

Sophie, that's

wonderful news. Wow!

I'm very excited.

And I think you should

come with me.

-Come with you to Boston?

-Yeah, why not?

What would I do in Boston?

We could find a place together.

What would I do for money?

Can't you do

bookkeeping there?

And what about my kids?

Your kids

are grown-ups, Wanda.

They are at a very vulnerable

time in their lives right now.

So am I. So are you.

Isn't that what life

is all about?

-I think--

-[knock on window]

-[Henry] Okay.

-[Sophie] There's an old man

and, like, three children.

Okay. It's all right.

That's Henry. Hmm.

Wow. Okay, let's give Wanda

a little private time.

[boy] Yeah.

[car engine starts]

She's awesome.

You always been a l*sbian?

It's a recent thing.

Careful! Easy--

Watch the paint.

My, the boys

are getting so big.

Did you ever sleep with Cindy?

-With who?

-Cindy-- Whatever.

The neighbor.

She lived in the house

behind ours.

-Cindy Asher?

-Yeah.

You guys used to lie

in the sun together,

put lotion on each other.

-No. No.

-No? That's too bad.

Yeah. It sounds like

maybe you wanted

to sleep with Cindy Asher.

-Could that be it?

-I will take the fifth on that.

Does Marshall know

you're sleeping with a woman?

He broke his wrist

about a month ago.

I'm going to tell him

after it heals.

What does a broken wrist

have to do

with you sleeping

with a woman?

Well, Marshall likes to play

basketball, right?

Baseball and... he can't now

because of his wrist.

He's very depressed,

so I'm just going to tell him

after his wrist heals.

Oh, okay.

Now, you sound like Mark,

with all his reasons

when something happens.

Please, in the name of God,

just stop! Sit!

-Okay.

-You know, I was talking

with Marshall,

and he was kind of

complaining that you--

You were talking to Marshall

about my relationship with him?

-What business is that of yours?

-He brought it up.

We just think that maybe

you should embrace the fact

it's time to move on to the next

phase of your life, like I did.

What are you doing here, Henry?

Don't you have a job

or something?

I need to talk about

Sarah's wedding.

All right. The dress

is almost done. It's beautiful.

I have a picture on my phone

if you want to see it.

I left you a message

about the church.

It looks like we're set.

I swear to God,

I'm going to k*ll you!

Here's the thing.

Here's the thing.

I thought I was going to be able

to chip in, but I can't.

Henry, don't.

Who decides to have a big

wedding at the last minute?

Sell that stupid car.

It's not a stupid car.

That car's a classic.

I have spent years

restoring it lovingly, okay?

There's only one other of those

on the entire East Coast.

Who cares? This is what

you do for your kid.

I can't do it. I can't do it

right now. The market sucks.

You just said

there's only one of them.

There's only one

on the East Coast,

but it turns out there's a lot

of them on the West Coast.

It's complicated.

The market's-- It's swamped.

So, the best offer I'm getting,

it's like half my asking price.

And I don't know

if you've noticed,

but I have a few more kids

than I used to.

-And that's Sarah's fault?

-Look, can we just...

talk honestly for a second

about this wedding?

-Don't. Don't, Henry.

-No.

You know I love her.

I want to do anything

that I can for her.

I mean, doesn't it

kind of smell like

this may be the first

of several weddings for her?

That is an awful thing to say.

I'm just saying

what everybody's thinking.

Oh, boy. So what am I

supposed to do now?

I'm just saying

I don't have the money.

I can't contribute anything.

If you want to do

this big wedding,

you're gonna have

to pay for it yourself.

I'm sorry.

Hey!

What did I tell you?

You sit in the car.

It's not a-- it's not a bouncy.

[laughter]

[indistinct chattering]

[man] What's up, Wanda?

[Wanda] How's it going?

Hey.

Hey, I'd come

and give you a kiss,

but you seem like

you're in a good groove.

I always have time

for a little kiss.

-How's the wrist?

-It's good.

They said I can take this thing

off at the end of the week.

-Oh, great.

-Yeah.

You know, I'm still pissed

that I broke it, but...

-Well, you know, people

get hurt all the time.

-Yeah.

You know what it is?

It's just, it's stupid,

but I hate getting old.

[laughs]

-It's stupid, right?

-No, I mean, everybody

in the world feels that way.

But what's the point of life?

You know, what's the real point?

-What do you mean?

-I don't know.

I feel like I lost

the thread of my life.

Like, I just don't know

what to do with myself.

Because you broke your wrist?

I broke my wrist.

I can't play sports.

I can't do what I want

when I want to do it.

And I start to think like,

what am I even doing here?

Like, what is the point

of all of this?

Like here on earth?

It's insane. Right?

I know it's probably

a midlife crisis,

but I swear I went through

one of these two years ago.

Well, why don't you wait

to see how you feel

once the cast comes off?

You're right. That's smart.

You want to get married?

-What?

-Forget I said that.

Forget I said that.

Okay. You're kind of a little

all over the place.

I'm sorry. I-I shouldn't

have said that.

I shouldn't

have asked you that.

Let's talk about the news

about your mother.

I'm sorry. How's she

taking the news?

Well, uh, since she thought

she had lung cancer,

somehow leukemia is like

the best news in the world.

And how was the rest

of your day?

Well, Mark got thrown

out of therapy.

Then I had to rush to meet Sarah

at the hospital.

-Is she all right?

-Yeah.

She didn't feel the baby kick,

so she thought

something was wrong.

Wait, was there?

No. He started

kicking up a storm

while we were sitting there

in the waiting room.

-Wow. You had some day, huh?

-Yes.

Then Henry came by

with all of his many children,

told me that he can't pay

for his half of Sarah's wedding.

Wow, that's a lot of people.

You see anybody else?

Uh, no, that was it.

Uh, let me--

No. That was-- Yeah.

But he said

he was going to pay.

Yeah, now he says apparently

he can't afford it.

So what are you going to do?

I don't know. I'll figure

something out, I guess.

You know, I could

give you the money.

That is very generous, Marshall.

Thank you, but--

Just keep it as an option.

You know, I've been

trying to figure out a way

to be a part of this wedding.

Maybe this is,

you know, my way in.

[light music playing]

-This is from last week.

-Perfect, thank you.

[lounge music playing]

-There's my daughter.

-Here I am.

Are you going to come by

and check on me every night

now that I'm sick?

-[cell phone chimes]

-Is it too late to get

that ice cream?

No, I'd love it.

Who is that?

-Oh, it's your granddaughter.

-Well, what is she saying?

She says she can't sleep.

Oh, well, let's go

bring her along.

I'm going to get strawberry,

chocolate

-and then I'm going to get

some Jamocha almond fudge.

-Uh-huh.

-I'd like some hot chocolate

fudge syrup...

-Uh-huh.

-...but not that liquidy kind.

-Okay. Mm-hmm.

Shoobie-doobie

Doobie-doo-wop-wop...

[Wanda] Thank you.

-How come you couldn't sleep?

-Oh, I don't know.

Maybe it's because I have

a tiny human inside me

who's trying to kick

his way out.

[Sarah winces]

This place

has been here so long

that your grandpa

used to take me here

when we were dating.

That's so romantic.

Did I ever tell you

about the time when

your grandpa robbed a bank?

No, no. You've never told me

anything that awesome.

Dad never robbed a bank, Mom.

-This was before I met him.

-Mom!

Do you want to hear

this story or not?

Well, I do. Shut up, Mom.

Let her tell it.

You know, I've always known

that I had fugitive blood

running through my veins.

Stanley must have been

about 18 years old,

and he had just quit

the chicken factory.

What's a chicken factory?

It's a great big place

where they k*ll thousands

of chickens every day,

and Stanley quit

after less than a week

and then didn't eat chicken

again for the next two years.

So he had no money coming in,

and he didn't want

to move back in

with those parents of his.

-So he started robbing banks.

-Just the one bank.

Yeah, if you steal enough money,

you only need to rob the one.

So he's in a bar one day,

and this tough old fella

strolls up to him

and his name is Lucky,

which is a joke name,

because this Lucky

had the worst luck

of anybody in the world.

And he whispers

to your grandfather

how he's going to rob

a bank on Friday

and he needs a getaway driver.

Somehow I cannot see Dad

being a part of this.

He needed the money.

Keep going, Grandma.

Stanley didn't want to do it,

but he figured,

I don't have to do any of

the robbing. Just the driving.

So the day comes.

Lucky has stolen them

a really fast car,

and they head over

to the bank.

Oh, my God, this is so exciting.

I know that Grandpa doesn't die

in a shootout or anything,

but it's still really exciting.

Lucky says, "You stay right here

in front of the bank

till I come out and jump

into the backseat."

He's supposed

to just stay there?

Oh, now

you're all interested.

So your grandfather

is scared to death,

but he's got the car running,

and he's clutching

the steering wheel

with both hands

so tight his knuckles

are white.

The baby loves this story.

He keeps jumping up and down.

Sweat is pouring down

your grandfather's face,

and he's going to stay

right there,

even though he thinks he hears

a siren in the distance.

He shouldn't just wait there.

He should leave Lucky.

He should go.

And then he hears yelling

from in front of the bank.

The back door rips open,

Lucky jumps in

and yells, "Drive!"

Is that it?

Is that the end of the story?

No, but my ice cream

is melting.

I have to eat some of it before

it gets mushy, which it is.

Oh, it's so much better

when it's mushy.

-What?

-What?

At home, I microwave

my ice cream before I eat it.

-Microwave?

-Yes.

Whose child are you?

Grandma, the story.

Keep going.

Stanley is tearing

down the street.

They get out of the city.

They're on some old

country roads.

They're going

90 miles an hour.

And Grandpa's actually giddy

because they did it.

-They robbed a bank.

-[Sarah] Wow.

So your grandpa

calls back to Lucky,

"How much money did we get?"

And from the back seat he hears,

"What are you talking about?"

Is Lucky trying to screw grandpa

out of his share?

Grandpa turns back to see

what Lucky's talking about,

and the fella

sitting in the back seat...

-isn't Lucky.

-Who is it?

When he heard all the yelling

from in front of the bank,

he assumed that it was at Lucky.

But it turns out,

there's a young couple

having a great big argument

in front of the bank.

The woman is hitting her fella

with her purse,

then she started punching him.

So he pushes her away,

jumps in the back

of your grandpa's car

-and yells, "Drive!"

-No way.

So what happened to Lucky?

Oh, Lucky.

They caught Lucky standing

in front of the bank

with a big bag of money

and a really confused look

on his face.

It turns out they gave him

two and a half years.

I like this story so much.

It's a good one.

[cell phone ringing]

It's Mark.

Oh, my gosh. He's house-sitting

this gorgeous house on a lake

-while the owners are away.

-Hey, Mark.

Yeah. No, I'm sitting here

with your sister and...

What's that?

Uh, okay. Yes.

Okay. All right.

I'll be right there. Bye.

-Okay, we have to go.

-Why?

Because your brother

is in jail.

-What?

-Since when?

I'm going to drop you guys off

and find out what's going on.

[Grace] No, I'm going with you.

-No, you are not.

-[Sarah] So am I.

No, you're not and I'm not

arguing about this.

Man, I could use

another ice cream.

That was so good, wasn't it?

Yeah, we should go

to that place every night.

We'd weigh 700 pounds.

Yeah, but then we could join

a gym together or something.

How'd you stay thin

when you were young, Grandma?

[chattering continues,

indistinct]

What are we waiting for?

-I thought you paid Mark's bail.

-I did.

-Well, what's he in for?

-Breaking and entering.

Oh, see, Mark's got the fugitive

blood, like me and Grandpa.

You don't have

fugitive blood, honey.

Agree to disagree.

There's Mark.

[Mark] What are you guys

all doing here?

Did those cops shave your head?

No. What? What do you think

police do? I did it myself.

It looks like it. You should

have called me.

I always do Eugene's.

I don't understand.

Why did it take all three of you

to come and get me?

Because we are family.

Yeah, that's what family does.

If they ever strap you

to the electric chair,

we'll all be sitting right there

in the front row

when they zap you.

Okay. Thank you, Grandma.

That's very nice.

Mark, what happened?

Oh, it was just

a misunderstanding.

Yeah, about that house

you showed me.

Guy came home a lot earlier

than expected.

So, you just broke in?

I didn't break in.

You were there. You saw.

I knew where the key was.

I knew the alarm code. He--

He would have let me stay there.

I just couldn't find him to ask.

They could

throw your a*s in jail

for breaking and entering.

I mean, did you steal something?

No, of course I didn't

steal anything.

I wouldn't do that.

Oh, look at you all offended

about me asking questions

while we're bailing you

out of jail.

You wanna talk about jail?

Let's see how Eugene's feeling

knowing he's going to be

shackled to this soon.

-Everybody calm down.

-Shut your mouth!

-[Mark] Ow!

-[Wanda] Sarah!

[Grace] Sarah!

Let's get out of here

before we all get arrested.

-Get in the car!

-[Mark] Christ!

[Grace] Nice young lady.

[Sarah]

Stop being such a baby.

Oh, Mark.

This guy is not going

to press charges, Mom.

How do you know him?

And how about you tell me

the truth this time.

Weed.

So he's a drug dealer?

Weed's basically legal.

He's more of a wholesale

supplier, but...

He says he's retired,

but I know it's too much money

to completely

walk away from, so...

Boy, you're really hurting

my heart over here, Mark.

Mom, it's fine.

Don't have to worry about me.

It's funny how you

keep saying that

even as I am driving you home

after bailing you out of jail.

[Mark sighs]

[Sophie]

You always work this late?

Something came up with Mark.

Is he okay?

Yeah. I don't really want

to get into it right now.

Okay.

Let's go hit that bed of yours.

You been drinking?

I was out celebrating,

uh, the new job

with a couple of people

from work.

You didn't think maybe

I'd want to come?

Why would you want

to have drinks

with a bunch of book nerds?

This thing between us,

it's not just sex, right?

I mean, the sex is pretty great.

Oh, my God.

Hey. Hey.

The sex is amazing.

But of course

that's not all there is.

Don't you feel the power

when we're together?

Power?

Yeah. I can't think

of the exact name.

You just called it power.

You say you want this

to be more than sex,

but you never actually

tell me what you want.

What-- What do you mean?

I ask you how your day was,

and you don't want

to talk about it.

You tell me about your son

or your daughter or your mom.

What emergency there was.

But what do you want?

[Sophie snoring]

[Sarah] Mom, your favorite

and very thoughtful child

brought you some coffee.

Good morning.

-Hi.

-I'm Sarah.

-I'm Sophie.

-Yes, you are.

Okay, well, I'll just, uh,

give you girls a minute.

And, uh, then you can come

see your grandbaby

-at the doctor's office with me.

-Yeah. Give me a minute.

-Sorry.

-It's okay.

Just give me a second

before you start talking.

-My mother's a l*sbian...

-All right.

My mother's a l*sbian,

and my brother's going to jail.

I mean, I used to think

that I was the most interesting

person in this family,

but it turns out,

I'm a distant third.

Honey, can we just not make

such a big deal about this?

-Can we just go?

-Oh, okay.

Not a big deal. Fine.

Have you told Marshall?

I'm gonna--

I'm gonna tell Marshall.

-Oh, Mom.

-I'm going to tell him.

Let's go.

[indistinct announcement on PA]

That nurse is cute.

Mom, don't you think

that nurse is cute?

Well, I think she's cute.

-What are you talking about?

-I'll tell you later.

Oh. Sarah? The doctor

will see you now.

How you holding up, Eugene?

Yeah. You know, I think

I'm just ready to meet the kid

at this point, you know?

Can I ask you

something personal?

Sure.

When I was in the ER with Sarah,

she said that you always

want to have sex.

I did-- I don't.

Oh.

No, I, um... I do.

We have. Obvio--

Obviously, we have. Um...

It's-- you know how Sarah gets.

If I don't act like I want

to have sex all the time,

then she gets angry, you know.

And if she gets--

Then she thinks that I think

that she's ugly.

I don't think that she's ugly.

I never think that she's ugly.

It's just, frankly, I'm a little

freaked out by the prospect

of having sex with a woman

when she's--

[nurse] Grasea.

[whispering]

...of having sex with a woman

when there's a baby that's going

to come out any second.

It kind of scares me

a little bit.

So I have to pretend,

you know,

to try to keep her happy.

I got you. I got you.

-You know?

-Okay.

I should have guessed

it was something like that.

[chuckles]

-Can I ask you something?

-Yeah.

Is it always

going to be like this?

Just hang in there

till the baby comes, okay?

You are at the very beginning

of the really fun part.

Trust me.

I just...

-This is my fault.

-No, no, no, you're...

It's going to be okay.

[chuckles]

[upbeat music playing]

Wanda, you are saving my life.

Oh, please. I am happy to help.

So, I cleaned out

the entire kitchen for you.

Oh, that is so nice of you.

I don't need it. I got my grill.

Grill? How do you make dessert

with a grill?

You gotta trust me.

Okay. Campfire cones.

You take the cone.

You put in some marshmallows,

chocolate sauce,

chocolate chips, crackers.

Wrap it in tinfoil. Put it

on the grill five minutes.

Off the grill.

Ice cream on top.

You, my friend, will be the hero

of your daughter's class.

I like that. Yeah.

Sounds delicious.

All right, strong man.

Take this yellow box.

-All right. Here we go.

-I'll get the grill.

[Albert grunts]

You good? Let me know

if you need a hand.

-This is just sugar, huh?

-Yeah. [laughs]

And I'll get... You know what?

You'll get the grill.

Yeah, I got it. I got it.

-Good job.

-Yeah.

[grill clattering]

So I really, uh,

I really appreciate

you taking the time

to help me with this.

Ah! I'm happy to help.

If I wasn't here,

I'd probably be

running around doing something

for my kids, so.

Yeah, I remember days like that.

It's so much fun.

You know, fun is not the first

word that comes to mind.

[laughs]

You know, I have to, uh,

I have to take you out

to dinner

to pay you back for this.

-No, you don't.

-Oh, I want to.

All right.

I mean, not-- not like a date,

though. Just...

No, no, of course not. No.

Why, uh-- Why not as a date?

Are you seeing someone?

As it turns out,

I am seeing two people.

-A man and a woman.

-Really?

I mean, not really.

Not at the same-- not together.

I don't know why

I'm telling you this.

[laughs]

It sounds pretty ridiculous

now that I'm saying it

out loud.

No, no, it doesn't

sound ridiculous at all.

What?

If I'd known that this type

of dating was going on here,

I would have never left.

[laughs]

All right, okay. Enough.

Go check on those or something.

[sighs]

-There's my girl.

-Hi.

-How are you?

-Good.

-Ready?

-Yeah.

-[Marshall] You okay?

-Yep, yep, yep.

Were you able to sleep

last night?

Yeah. You know.

-It'll be good

to get this done with.

-Mmm.

Yeah.

Hey. So I usually don't handle

these things, but--

Why don't we just come back

when Alice is here?

You know what?

I know I saw Alice

put away the file, so.

Now I thought your ex-husband

was paying for half the wedding.

I'm actually

taking care of it instead.

Oh, okay, great.

You know what?

It's not my business, so.

[Reverend Peter laughs]

By the way, do you take checks?

Well, if I can't find

the paperwork for the wedding,

then I can't

tell you the amount.

We can't have you leaving

the church

a blank check, right?

I feel like now's the time

to tell a joke about God

and blank checks

in the church.

[Reverend Peter laughs]

Yeah. Well, we don't--

Around here, we tend not to tell

too many God jokes, but...

-[Marshall] Right.

-Yeah.

I mean, if you go through

the Bible,

it turns out He doesn't have

the greatest sense of humor.

Oh, you know what?

Here it is.

"Miles, Sarah." Excellent.

And I don't know why

she does this.

Who goes through the trouble

of making a file

and then putting nothing inside?

Why does she do this to me?

You know, we'll come back

another time.

It's not existential.

It's like a legitimate question.

Well, why don't we

just take care of it now?

Wanda, we're here.

No, because I-- Alice knows--

You know, I've been talking

to Alice the whole time.

She's not here right now.

The Reverend is not used

to handling, you know,

the paper--

And I'm seeing some--

I am seeing someone else.

I'm sorry. I don't understand.

I'm sorry.

I'm talking to Marshall.

I am seeing someone else

behind your back.

-It's okay.

-No, it's not okay.

I can't have you pay

for half this wedding

when I'm lying to you like this.

It's just not right.

I can't do it.

I already know.

You're seeing the English

professor, Sophie, right?

You al-- You already know?

Sophie's a woman's name.

I'm going to go see if Alice

is back yet because...

Alice?

It's okay.

-Wanda, can you stop

for a second?

-No, it's so humiliating.

Will you just wait a minute?

How long have you known

about me and Sophie?

About a month.

That's how long

I've been seeing her.

-Agnes from across the street.

-Uh, yes?

Her husband Billy, he sells me

most of my domestic beers.

Yes, yes, I know

who those people are.

Well, Agnes saw you

kissing Sophie on your porch,

and then she told Billy,

and then Billy told me.

So? I mean, it could have

been something innocent.

You know, I drove by your house

and I saw her car parked there.

And then sometimes

I drove back,

and the car was still there

in the morning.

Jesus, Marshall,

aren't you supposed

to be running a restaurant?

I know, but my wrist--

-Will you stop with the wrist?

-Okay.

You don't seem at all angry

about this.

I don't understand

why you're not upset

about me and Sophie.

I am upset.

But I don't know, maybe

because it's two women.

That is so insulting.

-Is it?

-Yeah.

-[cell phone ringing]

-It's like you don't believe

that two women

could have a real relationship.

Can you not answer that now?

Hey. Yes. Hi, Sarah.

Oh. Yes. Okay. I'm not far.

Yeah, I'll be right there.

Uh, I-- I don't think we should

see each other anymore.

You're breaking up with me?

I think it's for the best.

Oh, too bad

I'm not one of your kids.

What is that supposed to mean?

I'm crazy about you,

and you're breaking up with me.

Your kids,

they treat you like sh*t.

They take advantage of you.

And as soon as they need you,

you just run off.

You drop everything.

I don't have time to explain

to you how wrong you are.

[Marshall] All right. Okay.

Go help your grown-up kids.

[engine starts]

Mom.

-There's my daughter.

-What are you doing here?

I was watching the news,

and then that son of yours went

and sold his TV

and took it away.

Well, what is going on?

Where is all of Mark's stuff?

Well, I guess he sold that, too.

[Sarah] I still think

you could have

gotten more for the TV.

[Wanda] Mark!

-You called Mom?

-Obviously, I called Mom.

I only called Grandma.

Now I got the whole family here?

Mark, what is going on?

Where is all of your furniture?

Tell Mom

why you called Grandma.

I got to get this AC

down to the guy in 1A

before he gets to work.

Just...

He called Grandma

because he wanted money.

Did he, Mom?

I called Sarah to take me

to the bank,

and instead she brought me

straight here,

and they've been arguing

ever since.

-Mark, why do you need money?

-I don't.

Is this about drugs?

Nope. I haven't done drugs

in years, Mom.

Put that down.

You'll give yourself a hernia.

It's not...

It's not about drugs.

Tell her why you needed

the money, Mark.

Okay. It's not a big deal.

What do you mean,

it's not a big deal?

What is not a big deal?

Mark enlisted in the Army.

-You did what?

-Yeah, he enlisted.

Is that really such a huge deal?

Like the Army-Army?

Where they send you to wars

and people sh**t at you.

That Army, Mark?

Mom, there's thousands of jobs

in the armed services.

It's not all that.

You can become a mechanic

and repair Jeeps.

Oh, and that's why

you joined the Army.

Because you want

to repair Jeeps?

You couldn't learn

to repair Jeeps here?

I don't want to be a mechanic.

That was just an example.

The first example

you thought of is something

you don't even want to do.

-Okay, Sarah. Thank you.

-I could not possibly

be the problem here.

Why is everyone

in my apartment right now?

-I was brought here.

-I know that.

Sarah, sit down.

I don't understand

how this is even possible, Mark.

You were just arrested.

Gary dropped the charges

on the breaking and entering,

like I said he would.

And I called Grandma

because I thought

maybe I could borrow

like a couple bucks

because I'm completely broke

and, like...

I just didn't know if the Army

pays you right away

or if it takes

a couple weeks or so.

No. You don't need money

when you go into the Army

because they pay for everything.

Oh.

Well, I also owed

some people some cash.

-Hmm. There it is.

-Okay, Sarah, can you please--?

Why are there five answers

to every question I ask you?

-When I ship out

tomorrow, I'll--

-To--tomorrow?

Yeah.

I signed up

a couple of weeks ago.

I'm going to Louisiana.

No, you can't go.

You can't do tomorrow.

You're going to have

to tell them that you can

push it back because--

You can have your father

call them.

Mom, it's done. I'm signed up.

I'm going tomorrow. It's done.

So you were just

going to leave?

You can drive me tomorrow

so I don't have to take the bus.

If you want.

I gotta...

[door opens]

[door closes]

[Wanda breathes deeply]

I am so sorry, Mom.

You saw him.

He's so skinny and frail.

How's he going to survive

even a week in the Army?

How is he ever

going to survive in jail?

It did seem like that's

where he was headed.

No. There's no way

I'd let him end up in jail.

There's some things

that you have no control of.

So I hear now

that you're dating girls.

I'm not getting

into this with you.

Do you want to talk

about Mark some more?

I don't know what else

there is to say.

Hey, Mom...

are you gonna finish that?

[calculator whirring]

[Henry] I'm telling you, man,

cars now,

they're made out

of like, you know,

papier-mch,

composite bullshit.

This car, you know,

it's an American car

with ba*ls, you know.

You know what I mean?

Gracias.

[groans]

Oh, sh*t.

Wanda.

You're tying one on

at Kwan's, huh?

I had a fight with Allison.

-Oh, yeah? What about?

-Money.

Gosh, how unusual.

You are usually so good

with money.

[laughs sarcastically]

You're really good

with relationships.

-[Wanda] Oh, please.

-Oh!

Anyway, yeah, she's pissed.

She would also like me

to sell my car.

Huh! Good.

Does no one to understand

what it means to be a classic?

It means that they do not

make that car anymore.

They-- They will never

make another.

This is something that--

It should be cherished.

And Allison

doesn't share your view.

No. When she gets pissed,

she says she's going to douse it

with gasoline, set it on fire.

[laughs] I've had exactly

that thought.

Why does everyone

hate this car so much?

[grunts] Whoa!

-Are you all right?

-Yeah.

-Okay.

-Yeah, I'm fine.

I'm fine. I can drive.

Sorry, man. I need change.

So, did Mark tell you

that he joined the Army?

Yeah.

Yeah, about, uh...

About a week ago.

What are you-- I just saw you.

Why didn't you say anything?

I don't know. I thought

he would have told you first.

[Wanda sniffles]

So what are we going to do

about this?

I actually think the Army

could be kind of good for Mark.

So what happens when he goes

over to some other country

and, like, you know,

kills people

or watches his friends

get k*lled?

He's not a kid anymore, Wanda.

-He's stronger than you think.

-But the Army?

I just, I think he knows

he needs some structure,

and I think, you know, he wants

some kind of higher purpose.

Higher purpose.

Let him do yoga.

I also think, you know, not

spending all his time with you

isn't the worst idea.

I hardly even see him.

Yeah, but you're the safety net

he calls whenever

there's trouble.

Same with Sarah,

same with your mom.

-That's ridiculous.

-[chuckles]

Whatever they need,

whenever they need it,

whatever you're doing,

you drop it, you go

and you rescue them.

-No, that is not true.

-[Henry chuckles]

[cell phone ringing]

[Wanda breathes deeply]

-You want me to get that?

-No, I got it. Thank you.

Hello?

[Grace]

It's your favorite mother.

Hi, Mom. How's it going?

I need you to come down

to the casino and pick me up.

At the casino? What are you--

I just dropped you off

at your home two hours ago.

I know, but the girls wanted

to go to the Horseshoe,

so I hitched a ride.

Problem is, I won so much money

playing poker

that I need you

to come down here,

so we can each cash out

on half of what I won,

and I won't have to pay taxes

on any of it.

-Mom...

-I need you, Wanda.

My poker girls busted out

on me and left me.

I'll give you $500

towards Sarah's wedding.

Uh... all right.

Give me 45 minutes, okay?

-I love you.

-Love you.

[clicks tongue]

Just don't, okay?

Hey, I'm not saying anything.

Like everybody else,

I just appreciate the ride.

Ah...

[Wanda] Mom, just wait there.

I'm going to go park

and then we can check--

[Grace] No, no. We don't need

to do that now.

[Wanda] Wait. Why?

I was sitting here,

and I realized

that I had a little time

to wait,

so I thought I could squeeze in

a few more hands.

And so you lost

all the money?

No, I just cashed out

with $200.

How much were you up

when you called me, Mom?

A little over 4,000.

Oh, Mom!

Please don't yell at me.

I am a sick woman.

You cannot use that excuse

for the rest of your life.

You should have seen the hand

that I got beat on.

I couldn't possibly care less.

He had a full house.

Threes over eights.

Mom, I said I don't want

to hear about it.

Fine. I thought just maybe

deep down, you really did.

-Well, I really don't.

-Okay.

[blinkers beeping]

Where are you going?

-Where are you going?

-I don't know.

What are you so angry about?

I spend all day, every day

driving people around,

cleaning up their messes.

Who's everybody?

You, Sarah, Mark.

I do everything for Mark,

and he joins the Army?

I mean, I feel like I just

completely failed him.

Like he just went

and jumped off a bridge.

He hasn't, Wanda.

Now I can't pay

for Sarah's wedding.

-Why not?

-Because Henry can't stop

having children.

And now he can't pay

for his half of the wedding.

That jackass.

And then Marshall

offered to pay,

and I said, no, you can't,

because I'm having an affair

with a woman

behind your back

for some reason.

-And what did he say to that?

-He already knew.

Agnes and Billy across

the street already told him.

Oh, that Agnes. She's always

been such a big mouth.

So... so, did Marshall

break up with you?

-No, I broke up with him.

-Why?

Because if I'm having

an affair behind his back,

it's a pretty good indication

that the relationship

isn't working out.

And then you went and lost

all that g*dd*mn money!

What does that

have to do with...

Oh.

Just make her go down

to City Hall and get married.

Because, Mom,

it's not what she wants.

People don't always

get what they want.

And Sarah would finally

realize that

if you'd stop helping her

all of the time.

Mom, then who's going to do it?

It's always me.

Who do you think's going to

babysit this kid all the time?

Who's going to go get Mark

when he gets thrown

out of the Army?

Two weeks ago, I had to go see

Henry's kids in a play.

He's not my husband.

They're not my kids.

Then stop

answering your phone.

What about I want to do?

What is it that you want to do?

I don't know.

Then how is anybody stopping you

if you don't know?

Because the phone

never stops ringing.

I don't have five minutes

to myself to think.

I just told you.

Stop answering the phone.

Okay. Maybe I'll drive you

back to the casino

and you can walk home.

I'm 150 years old.

I already learned that life

doesn't turn out

the way you want.

Have you noticed

that I'm trying to quit smoking?

I just thought you weren't

smoking in front of me

because you got tired

of me screaming at you.

No, I know

that it's important to you,

so I'm trying.

How's it going?

Good moments. Bad moments.

But the point of it is,

I know you think that I'm not

listening you, but I am.

And I know that it's the same

for Mark and Sarah.

I would like to believe that.

We just don't like to admit

when you're right.

So you think I'm right?

I've said way too much.

Because you know that's

the only reason I do this, Mom,

is because I'm right.

[sniffles] It's hard

to be right all the time.

[car door closes]

[Wanda sighs]

Are you drunk again?

Is that how you greet every

person who comes to visit you?

I have had an exhausting,

long day.

I think you should probably

just go home.

I'm sorry.

We can just hang out.

We can do whatever you want.

-Look, I'm not moving

to Boston with you.

-Why not?

Because I cannot imagine

anything worse

than going to Boston

and sitting around waiting

for you to come home

after hanging out

with all your friends.

It wouldn't be that way.

So, in Boston, I would

get to meet your friends?

I was thinking you'd probably

make your own friends up there.

You are ashamed

to be seen with me.

That's not true.

I just like to keep

different parts

of my life separate.

Lots of people do that.

Yeah. You have

the interesting people

that you like to hang out with,

and then this older woman

who you like to have sex with.

You would never think that way

if you were a guy

and I was a girl.

All right?

Plus, the sex is great.

No, you know,

the sex is just sex.

I don't know why you

keep trying to write

like a poem about it

or something.

-It's just sex, Sophie.

-It's just sex?

Yes, sex is one part of life,

and I want to have a whole life

with somebody.

Is that what you have

with Marshall?

No, I broke up with Marshall.

So you choose me.

No, no.

I need to break up

with you, too. It's over.

So does this mean

this is the last time

we're going to make love?

No, honey, it means

that you have to go home.

I'm sorry.

[door opens, closes]

[soft music playing]

[breathing deeply]

[soft music continues]

You're parked in the bus lane.

Get in.

You know, it'd probably

be a federal offense

if you try to kidnap me to stop

me from joining the Army.

All right.

You didn't have

to do this, you know.

I know.

You didn't have

to do this either.

Kind of did.

Thanks.

If you're not going

to say anything,

I don't know why you bothered.

Come here.

[sobbing]

Thanks, Mom.

[sniffles]

[sighs]

["Flowers of Forgiveness"

playing]

Standing on the corner

Just begging more time

I won't miss it

You can have some of mine

Flower of forgiveness

Ain't hard to grow

You can find it blooming

By the side of the road

By the side

How we gonna carry

All the things that we know

[train bell dinging]

A pound of feathers

Or a pound of stones

[train whistle blowing]

[song resumes]

Eyes on the line boys

Steady as she goes

We sang every song

Anybody's ever known

Gave 'em to the ghosts

By the side of the road

Oh, God, she's going to have

to let the waist out again.

Why don't we wait to see

what she has to say, okay?

It's my fault.

I can't stop eating.

You're not supposed

to stop eating, honey.

Yeah, but this morning,

I had a breakfast burrito,

and then it was so good

that I made Eugene

go through the drive-thru

and get me another one,

and now I'm in so much pain.

Why don't you sit down

for a minute?

I can't sit in this dress.

Well, we can get that off you.

-I would rather

just get it done.

-Okay.

Ugh! Did you talk to the cousins

and make sure they're still

coming to the wedding?

Actually, Sarah,

there's something

we need to talk about.

Uh-oh.

It's "Ladybug"

when things are good

and "Sarah" when something's

wrong. What's up?

-It's your father.

-Is he dead?

-No, he's not dead.

-Okay. Is he dying?

No. He just can't come up

with his half of the money

for the wedding.

Hmph!

I knew this was going to happen.

He has a new family,

and suddenly it's like

Mark and I never existed.

No, honey, that's not true.

He loves you very much.

That's...

Oh, God!

Why am I trying on

this stupid wedding dress

if there's not even

going to be a wedding?

You can wear the dress

to City Hall and get married.

Oh, my God, Mom,

that is so tacky.

I don't want to do that.

All right, look, I was able

to get together $8,000

for this wedding.

Why don't I give that money

to you and Eugene?

It's not about the money, Mom.

I know it's not about the money,

but you guys could buy

something nice.

Uh, you can go on a honeymoon.

I wanted the day!

I wanted the day.

I wanted the church.

I wanted people

to throw rice at us and...

I wanted... I wanted Dad

to walk me down the...

Honey, I know. I'm sorry.

[clears throat]

These burritos are k*lling me.

How's the dress looking?

[Sarah breathing heavily]

-Ladybug?

-[distorted guitar music

playing]

Ladybug?

Okay. Uh...

-Oh, probably not the burritos.

-Okay, go. Just go. I have...

Um... I got the shoes.

[stammers]

I'm gonna pay for this.

We'll be back.

Honey, let's just go.

[Sarah] Sorry about the mess!

I'm not ready. No, I'm not--

I can't have this baby.

I can't have this baby

because the wedding

was supposed to happen first.

-I know.

-The wedding was supposed

to be perfect,

and it was supposed

to happen first.

I have a plan, okay, honey?

-Just breathe, please.

-What's the plan?

-[sighs] I'm-- I'm not ready.

I'm not ready.

-Okay. Hold on.

-What are you doing?

-I'm not ready!

-Oh, Jesus!

-[Sarah groans]

-Sarah!

-What?

You're going to give me

a heart attack.

All right. They're coming.

-Uh, honey, please,

can we go inside?

-No. No.

-Get her to go inside.

-I'm trying, Mom!

She's gonna wind up

having the baby

right here on the sidewalk...

-Two seconds.

-...outside of the hospital.

...they're gonna kick

everyone out, so we have

to do this right here.

-All right. Let's go.

-Hello, Reverend.

It's your turn.

-Yup. Thank you, son.

-Breathe, please, honey.

-I said dress shirt.

-There's buttons on it.

Don't worry. Don't worry.

This is good.

Dearly beloved,

we are gathered here today...

Skip past... [groans]

Oh. Uh...

Um, what is marriage?

Marriage is a union.

I'm gonna need you

to skip to the "I dos"

before this baby comes sh**ting

out of me at you.

Oh, heavens.

Reverend, I'm sorry.

This is not at all ideal,

and I'm so appreciative for what

you're doing for our family.

-Where did you find this guy?

-Mom.

-Shall we begin?

-Yes.

Um, do you take this man

to be your husband?

-I do!

-And do you take

this woman to--

-Oh, my God!

-[Eugene] I do. I do. I do.

[Reverend Peter] I now

pronounce you husband and wife.

[Wanda] Very good.

Thank you.

When you're down

And troubled

And you need

Some loving care

And nothing

Oh, nothing is going right

Close your eyes

And think of me

And soon I will be there

To brighten up

Even your darkest night

You just call out

My name...

-Hey...

-We have the same haircut.

[laughs]

He's awake.

[gasps] Oh, my goodness.

Oh... Oh...

Oh, he is just fabulous.

[Sarah] He just opened his eyes

a minute ago.

-[Grace] No!

-[Sarah] Mm-hmm.

[Wanda] Oh, my goodness.

Oh, my goodness.

How are you doing, Eugene?

I'm a bit overwhelmed,

I think,

but I'm happy

to get to the fun part.

[Wanda laughs]

-Did I do good, Mom?

-Oh, you did so good, Ladybug.

I wish Mark were here.

He couldn't have waited a day?

How was he supposed to know

you were going to have

the baby early?

Yeah. And he probably

wouldn't be

a very good influence

on this kid anyway.

-All right.

-That's not very nice.

This is your brother

you're talking about.

I don't really mean it.

I just wish he was here.

Yeah.

All right, well, your father

is on his way here,

-and so I'm going to go--

-Not be here?

-Get a coffee. Yes.

-[Sarah] Mm-hmm.

[gasps] Hi. Hi.

Aren't you just

the most beautiful boy

in the whole world?

He smiled at me.

-He has my smile.

-Yeah.

Oh, hey there, Grandma.

-Where have you been?

-Work. You called me at work.

Yeah. You couldn't leave early?

I could, but I had to find

someone to pick up the kids.

-Your wife can't do that?

-She works also.

What's the matter with you?

I don't know. Your daughter

just got married and had a baby.

Yeah, and I'm here.

[scoffs]

-You mad, Wanda?

-Yes.

Yeah?

I think you could have

done a better job

looking out for Mark.

Jesus. Okay.

Um... Mark is fine.

Mark is going to be fine.

Now, are you angry

because he joined the Army,

or are you angry

because you're not gonna

be able to see him every day?

You're not gonna be able

to do his laundry

and cut up his food for him.

-Do me a favor.

-What are you gonna do

if Eugene gets a job

somewhere else?

Is he looking for another job?

No, he's not looking

for another-- I'm just saying,

this is what happens, Wanda,

with families now. They scatter.

You only get to see each other

once or twice a year.

Christmas, maybe every other

Thanksgiving. Anyway...

-Great. Thanks.

-Okay. You know what?

Next time you get a good man

like Marshall interested in you,

maybe you don't

just toss him away.

-Hey, Henry.

-Yeah?

f*ck you.

-How's it going?

-You look exhausted.

[sighs]

[Wanda mumbling]

[mumbling continues]

[mumbling continues]

Oh, God.

[screams]

[mumbles, cries]

[grunts]

[crying]

[sighs]

-[Albert] Wanda?

-[footsteps running]

-Wanda!

-[door opens]

Are you okay?

You could hear me yell?

-I could. Are you okay?

-Yeah, I'm fine.

[chuckles]

I became a grandmother today.

Congratulations.

And I took my son to a bus

that took him away to,

um, to basic training.

-Oh, that's-- that's tough.

-Yeah.

I think people think I'm boring.

Why would they think that?

Because I just live

for my family.

They give me everything I need.

All the joy and the laughter

and the fun and frustration.

They keep me very busy,

and you know what?

I love it. Mmm.

It's all I've ever wanted.

[sniffles] It's just keeps me

so, like, tickled.

So what's the problem?

Everybody keeps telling me

I'm supposed to want more

out of life.

I feel, like, guilty.

[sighs] Yeah, well, um,

maybe you feel guilty

because you know what you want

and most people don't.

Hmm. Maybe.

You love being with your family.

What else do you like?

What-- What else do I like?

Hmm.

I have no idea.

Well, lately,

it's making me so happy

just to watch the sun

come through the window.

You know, like...

Like this. See?

I do.

I watch it most mornings

from my bed. I can see it.

And I saw it the other day

at the church.

You know,

I know what that means.

Why it makes you feel that way.

-You do?

-Yeah.

Come on, I'll show you.

[Wanda grunts, sighs]

[Albert] Here.

-Hold on.

I have to wear shoes.

-Okay.

-Come on.

-Okay.

[sighs]

The sun has been calling you

outside all this time,

and you've been ignoring it.

I've got a daughter named June

and tonight,

my ex-wife and I

will go to sleep

and not know where June is.

-Is it drugs?

-Yeah.

It's insane to me

that I can't...

take out my phone

and call her.

Mark had it pretty bad,

but not quite like that.

I'm so sorry, Albert.

You've got a daughter

with a healthy baby

and a son who's starting

a new adventure.

I'd take that in a heartbeat.

Everybody keeps telling me,

you got to let go,

you got to move on.

Move on from my family?

Like, what does that even mean?

It doesn't mean anything.

You get the call

that they need you, and you go.

-Yes.

-If my daughter calls

right now...

[chuckles] ...I would

leave you on this porch

and never feel a second

of guilt about it.

Well, of course.

I would drive you to her

if you needed me to.

-Thank you.

-[Wanda chuckles]

[train whistle blowing]

[train bell dinging]

-One of the perks.

-[Wanda chuckles]

[exhales]

You want me to help you

pack up Mark's stuff?

You do, and I'll buy you a beer.

-Not as a date.

-Oh, no. Not as a date.

Although I did dump both

of those people I was seeing

-since the last time we talked.

-Really?

It seems that we talked

not very long ago.

Sometimes that's just

how it goes.

Okay.

Okay, what?

Just okay.

All right. Let's get started.

-[Wanda] Ooh, ooh, ooh...

-[Sarah] That is good.

-[Wanda] That's so good.

-[Sarah] That is good.

I never had yogurt

from here before.

See, Mom, it's good

to try different things.

Well, it tastes good,

-but I'm still going to pretend

that it's ice cream.

-[cell phone chimes]

-[baby fussing]

-[Sarah gasps]

-It's Mark.

-[baby fussing]

Oh. I just sent him a picture

of the baby the other day.

How's he doing?

He is getting on a plane

to Frankfurt.

Looks like he will be stationed

in Germany for the next year.

Well, that's good. Nobody

shoots at you in Germany.

That is absolutely right.

Did I ever tell you

about the time I got

my pilot's license?

-Oh! Mom, please.

-[baby fussing]

Do you want to hear

the story or not?

-Go ahead. Go to Grandma.

-[baby babbling]

Yeah, I want to hear it.

Tell me.

I was in high school.

I was playing

for the girls' basketball team,

and we had a coach, a great big

fat fella named Mr. North.

And he owned three crop planes.

One day he says to me,

my friend Willy and I...

[continues, indistinct]

["I'll Be Right There" playing]

Oh, darlin'

If you need someone

Don't you hesitate

to know I'll be there

If you ever need

someone to rely on

Just call

You know I'll always be there

When your nights

Get so lonely and hard

And you're looking

For a brighter day

I'll come running

I'll come running

Listen, people

What I'm trying to say

You know I'll be right there



You know I'll be there

Yeah

-Everybody

-Everybody

Everyone needs

Someone to love

-Everybody

-Everybody

Everyone

Needs someone to love

Let's take a trip

Oh, back in time

To remind your mind

I've always been there

Every stumble

Every trip and fall

Couldn't watch it all

And not be right there

When your nights

Get so lonely and hard

And you're looking

For a brighter day

I'll come running

I'll come running, baby

Listen, people,

What I'm trying to say

I'll be right there

-Everybody

-Everybody

-Needs someone to love

-Needs someone to love

-Everybody

-Everybody

-Ooohhh

-Needs someone

Ooohhh

And you know

I say what I mean

And you see how much I care

Ooohhh

-Everybody

-Everybody

Needs someone to love

Everyone needs

Someone to love

Everybody

Everybody

[singer vocalizing]

[song fades]