2x18 - The Age of Dissonance

[bunniefuu]

You were right about dan and rachel.

You have proof.

give it to me.

If they find out that I let an outsider in I'll protect you.

Your own father was one of them and you didn't even know it.

Don't contact me again.

I'm sorry for the interruption, But I have something I think almost everyone here would want to see.

I'm back at constance, got into yale.

Everything's perfect again.

I thought you lied to me.

Then why were you so ready to believe the worst? I think part of me wanted to.

It's over, isn't it?- what are you doing here? I came to apologize.

I don't know what came over me.

On the upper east side, All the world's a stage and all the men and women merely players.

But once a year, constance/ st.

Jude's students shed their usual roles and Take on new ones for the senior class play.

This year's pick-- "the age of innocence.

" I just can't believe this is a senior requirement or that Chuck got a doctor to actually diagnose him with acute stage fright.

Should have gone with mercury poisoning.

Before "gossip girl," there was edith wharton, And how little has changed.

The same society snobs still reigned, Only in corsets and horse-drawn carriages.

When I saw "the age of innocence" with daddy, I always pictured myself as winona, But playing the stronger, More emotionally complex female lead Just feels so right.

Dorota, hairpin.

Besides, you're so much more suited to play may, who's so pretty.

Uh, thanks.

At last, my life is perfect.

My only problem-- how to relate to my character.

Countess olenska is a ruined woman With no prospects, And let's face it��I have the world on a string.

Of course, there is the odious task of playing opposite dan humphrey.

Dorota, enough.

how are you two doing, b.

t.

w? I don't know.

I'm just trying not to think of him, distracting myself with other Distractions.

You mean your crush on our director? Julian is kind of amazing, isn't he? - Do you know that he directed - bogosian off-broadway In his last year of juilliard, blah, blah, blah? You can always depend on constance to snare some wunderkind.

But really, s.

, aren't you sick of brooding artists? Well, he broods in the sexiest way, that is, When he's not looking right through me.

Oh, my life is so bountiful.

I don't need a boyfriend to feel fulfilled.

Aah! oh, my god! come look at this! But I do need silence to emotionally prepare for the stage.

What are you clucking about? Nelly just got in early to yale.

Uh, that's impossible.

Yale only accepts one constance student early a year, and that's me.

She just got an e-mail directly from dean berube.

I have to find headmistress queller.

Julian, I added the fur collar to olenska's act two dress.

Add fur to the cuffs.

humphrey! This is an invited dress.

backstage now.

I can't believe I volunteered to do costumes.

Oh, for the days of eleanor's atelier.

Wait.

did I really just say that? How did she even show her face after everthing she's done.

Dan, remember, in scene three, you enter from stage right, not stage left.

Stage left, right.

No.

no, stage right.

yeah, I got it.

I just don't get why you want to do a documentary on all this.

Are you kidding? A high school forks out a small fortune to stage a play okay.

Hires broadway's hottest up-and-coming director-- That means you've got wealth, privilege, atrocious acting.

And the fact that you're doing "the age of innocence," - Well, that's just the icing on the cake.

okay.

But don't worry.

I won't make you look bad.

stop.

And whatever else, "the age of innocence" is one of the most beautiful books ever.

ugh.

It's, like, the most boring book ever.

Nothing happens.

Guy and girl want to be together, but can't, end of story.

Nate, the story's in the details.

The simple act of unbuttoning a glove expresses the character's Inner passion.

I can think of a lot more interesting ways to express my passion.

Oh, really? - towards you.

Chuck bass.

it's good to see you, son.

Mr.

campbell, hello.

I, uh, I'm sorry for your loss.

I was in prague for the funeral.

I would have paid my respects in person.

Thank you.

I'll come by the office.

I hear you're learning the ropes.

Trying to.

Enjoy.

thanks.

Is this okay?- perfect.

My lucky day.

carter baizen back in town.

A delight to see you, bass.

Elle? you're all right.

You have the wrong person.

my name is hayley.

What are you doing with this loser? Back off, bass.

the, uh, lady says she doesn't know you.

She knows me.

I know you're in some kind of trouble.

Whatever kind of help you need, You're not going to find it with him.

Carter, I have to use the ladies' room.

Get me a drink? just--just wait a sec.

Come on, bass.

don't cause a scene.

Heard you were in thailand recently.

Of course I had to leave in a hurry.

You should have come to see me in singapore.

How was singapore? I'm surprised you made it out in one piece.

I'm hooked up on every continent.

I landed last night, rrolled into apothe and met Well, who really cares what her name is, right? - God bless america.

mr.

baizen? Your date just exited through the kitchen.

Welcome home.

Hey.

jacket over vest and button to top.

Hello? what's wrong with you? Oh, um, no, it's--it's nothing.

Did you see how those teachers treated rachel? Yeah.

they were like grown-up mean girls.

If I wrote a note, could you deliver it? Dan, headmistress queller told her to stay away from you.

I saw how they were treating her.

it's--it's--it's my fault.

I just want to know that she's okay.

Hi, miss carr.

I love your necklace.

is it new? Uh, no.

it's quite old, actually.

Well, it's very nice.

Hi.

I am gonna sit in front until the first costume change.

Jenny, i-i really don't think that Thanks.

This is just a dress rehearsal.

There are people out there.

don't let the-- headmistress! there you are.

Nelly yuki claimed she got into yale early.

There must be some mistake.

I'm sorry, blair.

there's no mistake.

I was on my way to tell you I received a call from dean berube.

They've rescinded your acceptance and given the spot to nelly.

Is today april fool's? Though I had previously informed yale of your detention, I did not tell them what the punishment was for.

But apparently, an anonymous caller did.

The dean called for me to confirm the story.

I had no choice.

But I did penance for that.

I explained that you made amends, But yale considers hazing a faculty member a very serious offense.

I'm sorry.

There must be something we can do.

Blair, it's over.

You will not be attending yale.

Every actress eventually finds the hook into her character, Even if sometimes life has to give her a little push.

Waldorf, you're holding up the curtain.

Come.

now.

Upon my soul, it's countess olenska, parading herself at the opera.

It's a pity.

her life is finished.

But don't worry, b.

When god closes a door, he opens a play.

Elle.

I need your help.

Oh, did you tell my cousin ellen of our engagement? I hadn't had the chance.

oh, well, you mustn't.

she's been away so long.

Did I miss much? oh, no, just the first scene.

Hey, jenny, you dropped your Oh.

wait.

can i May knows as well as I do the real reason of her cousin staying away.

But I shall never let her see the least sign that I'm Conscious of there being a shadow on poor ellen olenska's reputation.

Get me out of this.

out of my way.

I need to make the fat lady sing.

Pull! - it's stuck.

No, leave it.

she'll need as much padding as possible.

What is your problem? My problem is a two-faced, four-eyed devious little snipe in a fat suit.

Did you really think you could rat me out to yale and get away with it? I don't know what you're talking about.

Everyone's jealous of me because my life is perfect, And you've always been the most jealous of all.

People aren't jealous of you, blair.

they hate you.

I didn't call yale, and good luck figuring out who did.

There are about a thousand people who would relish taking you down.

wanna hear the sickest scandal ever? Remember b.

's lord? It turns out he was giving the royal treatment to his own queen mother, And the worst part? B.

knew and ignored it.

How desperate can you be, b.

? No wonder yale dumped you.

who wants inbred legacies? Someone's out to get you, blair.

it's just not me.

Vanessa.

Julian.

hey, I made the adjustment you suggested in the garden scene.

Uh, yeah, yeah.

um, good show, sabrina.

So how does it feel to play may welland? Well, it feels like my character's rubbing off on me.

May's fiance pays no attention to her, and as for me Are you talking about julian? Well, the play opens tomorrow.

he's just distracted.

Julian, hey.

I was just thinking, It would be really helpful for my friend vanessa's Documentary to hear more about your vision for the show.

Why don't we all grab a bite to eat? I suppose it couldn't hurt to, uh, Give my actors a little more insight into my intentions.

Let me just grab my stuff.

I'll meet you in front.

Airing my dirty laundry to yale and sending the lord marcus "gossip girl" blast makes you officially my enemy number one.

I don't know what you're talking about, blair.

Honestly.

what are you doing with her? we hate her.

I don't hate her.

she's my friend, actually.

And you just need to calm down.

Calm down, serena? she got me axed from yale.

You're seriously taking her side? Fine.

But a word of advice-- she will be destroyed, And you don't want to become collateral damage.

Thank you.

I've been bathing like the french in restaurant bathrooms all week.

So you've been on the run.

You know, I wanted to contact you.

I felt like we had a connection.

but I was scared.

And carter? - I just met him.

He told me he was rich, so I thought he could help.

Please.

Look, no one is going to hurt you.

Are you kidding? You know the kind of people who are members.

They're powerful men, And the things I know about them could destroy their lives.

Nobody ever told me that once you're in, you're in for good.

If only I could just leave the country, Start over with a clean slate.

So that's what you'll do.

Money's not a problem.

We'll get you a new identity, a new passport.

How? I know a guy.

Thank you.

Just one question.

How do you feel about Brazil? Scorsese said that he considers "Age of Innocence" More violent than his films with g*ns and blood.

Marty's inspiration was "The Heiress.

" - William Wyler.

So you're a Wyler fan? Have you ever seen "Little Foxes"? Are you kidding? Serena made me see it, like, what, three times? She's obsessed with Bette Davis.

Yeah, Bette Davis.

I, um I love her eyes.

Her hair is harlow gold.

Hey, listen.

I'm gonna take off, okay? - I'll come with.

Oh, I was just gonna tell you my take on the play.

Yes, that's a great idea.

Don't go, please.

Nate, do you mind? No, no.

It's, uh, it's cool.

Listen I have Lines to practice anyway, so I'll go now.

So You know, uh, Nate's got the right idea.

I didn't realize how late it was.

Let me just grab the check.

Thank god.

Serena, I know you like him, but as your friend, Julian is the most self-absorbed, Pompous person I've ever met.

All he does is go on and on about classic movies, And it's totally annoying.

You were keeping up with him pretty good there.

Yeah, and I'm totally annoying.

Thanks, ladies.

Don't worry.

It's taken care of.

And, uh, it's been a lot of fun.

It has.

Uh, you know, All this talk about Bette Davis has--has Really got me thinking about my character.

You know, I think I could use some More coaching before the show.

What do you say? - Sure.

Say 4:00? Text me your address.

Great.

So what are you up to? - You mean, what are we up to? I may not be a huge classic film buff, But I have read "Cyrano.

" Hey.

Sorry.

When I finally came out, you were gone.

So You were great in the play.

I just-- No, I-I meant with Rachel.

Do you, like--did she respond? Uh, yeah.

She wrote a note.

All right, w-well, great.

Where is it? Um, dad has it.

Mr.

Humphrey-- - I believe this belongs to you.

Poor Miss Iowa-- caught playing Mrs.

Robinson.

Looks like the teacher just got schooled.

Dan, we need to talk.

Well, I've got nothing to say.

I went to see Miss Carr last night.

This thing between the two of you--it's over.

Well, we'll see.

You cannot be this short-sighted.

If word gets out about this, you'll be expelled.

Miss Carr will be fired for good.

Well, Miss Carr is the one who sent me the key.

So presumably, she understands that risk And she's making her own decision.

However grown-up you think you are, You're still in high school.

I care about Rachel, all right? And I'm 18.

So with all due respect, I think I'll decide who I see.

Oh, do go on, newland.

I do love your descriptions.

Well, why shouldn't we make them real? We shall, my dearest, of course, next year.

See, May is all about what's proper.

You've read other Wharton novels, right? "The House of Mirth"? Yes.

yes, I-I have.

Good, because "House of Mirth" Was a huge influence on clayton.

Jack Clayton.

He directed "the great gatsby.

" Jack Clayton, "Gatsby.

" Most critics consider it a failed adaptation.

No offense, Mr.

Film Fanatic, But I-I don't think the movie was nearly as good as the book.

I don't disagree.

Why do you say so? Some blame Clayton's direction, Others point the finger at Coppola's screenplay.

In "the times," vincent canby said-- - Whoa.

Slow down.

Excuse me? No excuse me.

It's just that sometimes my thoughts come so fast that I, uh, I get confused.

Sorry.

From now on, I'll say a line, And all you have to do is repeat it exactly.

You're quite right.

The film is impotent.

It totally misses what the book is even about-- The eternal conflict between the repression of Society and the passion of the individual.

You are so insightful, Julian.

I completely agree about the power of unexpressed passion.

You know, you are so insightful, Julian.

I completely agree about the power of unexpressed passion.

I have to confess, I underestimated you.

You're quite extraordinary.

Shall we get back to the scene? What was that? I'm sorry.

Just one second.

It's a text.

Yale's hallowed halls have gone to hell.

S.

got accepted, but not for her s.

a.

t.

scores.

Allowing a press release was her only prerequisite.

I have to go.

I-I lost track of time again.

We're late for the theater.

Are you ready to go? Yeah.

Yeah.

Good to see you, Hayley.

Or should I call you Elle? - sorry I ran off like that.

I just didn't know if I could trust you or not.

Baizen, you know I'm not your biggest fan, - But you are an expert at crossing borders.

I'm happy to oblige.

Especially if it means having Chuck Bass owe me a favor.

But my passport guy-- he's a bit of a paranoid freak.

He won't like an entourage.

I understand.

Look, you take Elle, and I'll meet you at Teterboro.

It's okay.

Thank you.

I'm so grateful.

Don't worry, Bass.

We'll take care of her.

I've lost everything.

I'm humiliated and shunned.

They've made me a flesh-and-blood countess olenska.

You are an actress.

Pour it into the role.

use pain onstage.

You're right.

I'm an actress.

no I'm a seagull.

No, you're a shameless b*tch.

Now what? Everything you've done spreading rumors about who I've had sex with, What alley I puked in Or telling Dean Berube that I k*lled pete fairman I forgave everything all because I thought one Day you'd grow up, but putting out a "gossip girl" blast about yale and the press release Serena, I didn't put out the blast.

At least have the dignity not to lie to my face.

wait.

but I'm not lying.

Only two people knew about it--you and Dan and dan would never do something like that.

I always want to believe the best in you, Blair.

The bottom line is, betrayal's in your nature.

I didn't do it, Dorota.

I believe you, miss Blair.

And if I didn't, that means Dan Humphrey did.

Vanessa told him about marcus, and he could've put that out, too, All to get back at me for teacher-gate.

Do you know how hard it is to get revenge When your enemy is changing every five minutes? You need to calm nerves and warm vocal chord.

you want tea? No, I want dan Humphrey's head on a platter.

Rachel, hey, hey.

I've been looking for you everywhere.

We have to talk.

no, no, dan.

we need to stay away from each other.

My dad showed up at your house.

We need to at least discuss this.

people are coming.

It was reckless of me to respond to your note.

Rachel What are we doing? I-i can't help myself.

Am I supposed to pretend I'm not feeling what I'm feeling? You know this can't last.

What can't? Our staying away from each other.

Oh, mother's carriage has arrived.

Do excuse me, dear.

of course.

So what happened with julian? We were in the middle of it, and then you just hung up.

oh, sorry.

I had to get off the phone.

But I shall never let her see the least signs that I am Conscious of there being a shadow on poor ellen olenska's reputation.

I'll explain later.

the next day, mrs.

Manson mingott received the young couple at a large House in an inaccessible wilderness in the central park.

Girl, bring me my fan.

Yes.

right away, ma'am.

Mr.

archer and miss welland.

At last.

I was beginning to think you were so besotted With love you'd forgotten about your old grandmother.

And when is the wedding to be? - Thank you for meeting me, mr.

campbell.

oh, it's my pleasure, Chuck.

Your father was one of my closest friends.

Which is why I was hoping you could help me with something.

My father was a member of a club.

Oh, I can get you off the waiting list at any place in town.

just name it.

I'm not talking racket sports.

this is a gentlemen's club.

As it happens, carter baizen is a member, too.

I'm not acquainted with mr.

baizen.

yesterday, park avenue winter? - You left right when he did.

I don't remember when I left.

And I don't know anything about a gentlemen's club.

The club moves every month.

There are girls there.

My.

my, my.

Well, Chuck I have no idea what you're talking about.

Someone I care about is in trouble, And this club has something to do with it.

Now knowing my father was a member, It only stands to reason that his closest friends were, too.

When I go to the authorities, I'll have to suggest they investigate everyone.

I'm sorry about your friend, but I don't know anything that could help.

Have a good evening.

Mr.

campbell, please.

I care about her.

I can't say anything.

Eastview Hotel 10:30p.

m.

The great uta hagen used to tell actors, "give birth to the new person you are to become.

" Well, with act one behind you and act two looming, my friends, You are still in labor.

I feel like I'm in labor.

Remember, being onstage Is like standing on the edge of a cliff.

What saves you is the love and trust you have in each other.

Also, my friend, the renowned "new york times" theater critic, Charles isherwood, is in the audience, and if you embarrass me, I will k*ll you.

now go.

Mr.

isherwood, thank you so much for coming.

Thank you.

Are you enjoying the show? - yes.

yes.

What happened to you? you were supposed to come by and get me.

I'm sorry.

You stood me up and your only explanation is "sorry"? Nate, what is going on? Nate, I told you.

Your character went bankrupt, suffered total public humiliation.

Not that you would understand that.

The characters in this play are smoldering tempests of emotion.

You're as empty as The federal reserve.

Nate, wait.

No.

I gotta go work on my smoldering tempest of emotion.

Don't you think that was a little harsh? Directors push buttons to get performances.

Put your camera on a tripod.

come watch the show.

what a pretty carriage.

Every time I see you, you happen to me all over again.

Ellen, you might be the most honest woman I've ever met.

What the hell are you doing? Oh, no, but one of the least fussy.

You're trying to ruin my life.

you're insane.

You must know that this can't last.

What can't? Our being together And not being together.

Don't try to gaslight me, humphrey.

I know you're just seeking revenge Because I ruined your chances with the simpy iowa Teacher.

And incredible as it may seem, not everyone spends their lives trying to plot revenge.

You ought not to have come today.

I look forward to seeing you.

Every thought is burnt up in a great flame.

Someone is out to get me, and all signs point to you.

You're the only one who knew it all.

it has to be you.

Six or seven days passed, and archer heard nothing from madam olenska.

Then one day, the newland archers received an invitation To dine at mrs.

Mingott's.

May, what a pretty gown.

Oh, thank you.

how are you feeling, granny? People tell me I'm old and ill, but I feel perfectly fine.

Hey.

here.

That charm will prove useful when "beu-fort" arrives.

I want him to feel welcomed.

uh, beau-beaufort.

Oh.

right.

beaufort.

Granny? My child, your beauty never wanes.

Ellen, it's been too long.

Much too long, cousin.

It was--it was really great of julian to let vanessa film it.

I guess she says he's an amazing director.

is that right? Nate, that's your cue.

go, go! okay.

sorry.

Beaufort, so, so good of you to come.

Uh, they say you've been abroad.

Well, yes.

I've--i've been, um I've been, um, you Uh, they--they say you've been abroad, right? Yes.

I've, um he's always had trouble with this line.

I You know what? whatever.

y-y-you want feelings? Well, i-i-i hate these clothes, I hate this play and I hate pretentious Asshats who try and steal other people's girlfriends.

In fact, I might just spontaneously punch one next time you get in my face.

I know just how mr.

Beaufort feels-- working so hard for something And losing it because people are out to destroy you.

Well, countess, At least you don't have to go through your whole life Worried your best friend will humiliate and betray you.

I hate this fat suit.

oh, and there's one other thing.

My whole family lost all of our money Before my father went to jail for embezzlement.

So I think I know more about humiliation andbankruptcy All right, all right.

than some lame dilettante director.

okay? Oh, what amusing companions.

no, stop.

Oh my god.

why don't we retire to the parlor, uh, for some port? No.

I'm damned with van der luyden.

all right.

Shakespeare says, "all's well that ends well," And then sometimes it just ends.

Nate had already ruined everything.

You high school idiots turned my play into a travesty, Embarrassed me professionally.

julian, it's charles isherwood.

Charles.

please, i-i can explain.

explain what? I loved it.

The classic interpretation of the first act juxtaposed with the radical Deconstruction of the second act--genius.

really? you--you thought it was genius? Yeah, I did.

The repressed characters melding with the actual kids Aggressively expressing their feelings-- how did you come up with it? well,as soon as I saw all that raw, adolescent emotion, I-i-i knew I had to use it, harness it, spin it into gold.

Well, congratulations.

I look forward to seeing what you do next.

G--that's great.

thank you for coming.

thanks.

Wow.

that was a whole new level of fake.

I'm going to look for my boyfriend.

good job.

You know, I don't know why I ever had a crush on you.

Serena I'm g*y.

Nate, wh-- what happened up there? I know you're into him, and I get it.

I mean, he's older, he's smarter, and you guys like the same stuff.

I can't compete.

you what? I came to the gallery today and heard you on the phone.

Oh, my god.

are you talking about julian? I was talking to serena.

she was with him.

She's the one who likes him, not me.

This is a total misunderstanding.

Well, you know, that doesn't change the facts.

All right? I mean, we have nothing in common.

I like espn, okay, and you like Books and movies.

The way you say that You didn't even bother to read "age of innocence.

" You didn't watch the dvd I gave you.

You're like a kid who swears he hates Tomatoes and has never even tried one.

Maybe you should be with a guy like julian who already likes tomatoes.

Maybe if you would put in some effort, you wouldn't be so insecure.

Elle.

Chuck.

how did you-- escape? turns out they didn't want to hurt me.

They just wanted me to sign an agreement.

They gave me some cash and told me to get out of town.

that's great.

Sao paolo awaits.

Sao paolo? brazil.

I can still help you get settled, and we can make a plan together.

Chuck, I am really grateful that you were willing to help me, But all I needed was someone to give me money.

Now I have more than enough, and I've already made a plan By myself.

So you were just using me? You've got a good heart.

You should give it to somebody who cares.

Hi.

that was some performance.

It was nothing compared to yours.

what do you mean? You called yale, sent the blast in to "gossip girl" To get revenge on blair.

I believed in you.

All your talk about integrity and ideals.

My ideals? Blair spread false rumors, blackmailed the school, Turned my job into a sham with no repercussions.

You're just as bad as she is.

No, you're--you're worse.

Blair is a high schooler.

you're an adult.

You need to fix things with blair.

absolutely not.

You know how you felt when your ideals were crushed? Well, congratulations.

you've crushed mine.

Hey, blair.

It's--it's rachel who's been messing with you, And we had sex in the costume closet, So you can do whatever you want with that.

Student sex in the costume closet-- is That what they mean by heartland values? I at least expected a denial.

No.

I don't deny it.

Well, the headmistress told me my fate at yale is sealed.

So the question is, how do I make your fate as bleak as mine? I don't know what's happened to me.

I don't know what I've become.

I'm So sorry.

Well, your punishment is Just Live with it.

I should know.

It's not easy.

Serena.

So just so you know, Blair isn't responsible for--for sending out that blast about yale.

I am.

You? Yeah, well, I told rachel about yale wanting to put out the press release, And she sent it in to "gossip girl.

" but w-why would you do that? I was trying to explain to her that you aren't like the other Girls here and-- i-i gotta go find blair.

thank you for telling me.

I'm so sorry.

And I get it if you don't want to talk to me right now, but the fact is, I come bearing snacks, Hoping that we can cuddle on the couch and watch espn.

come here.

You're watching "the age of innocence"? It's heartbreaking.

So are you.

I am a way better beaufort.

I'm--i'm sorry.

I-i know you were just looking out for me.

And rachel--well, she, uh, She turned out to be not who I thought she was or at least not anymore.

I'm sorry, too, son.

Dad, you were right about this, but I think you Need to give me space to make my own mistakes.

Well Lucky for you, you'll be at yale soon.

You can make all the mistakes you want, with, god-willing, Girls your own age.

b.

, I've been looking everywhere for you.

I know that was rachel that sent the "gossip girl" blast.

I'm sorry I didn't believe you.

Why would you? What do you mean? Believe me.

Nine times out of ten, I would have sent the blast.

Like you said, betrayal's in my nature.

I didn't mean that.

Spare me, serena.

I don't need a stirring speech telling me what a good person I am.

I know I'm not.

Yale kicking me out is the karma I've earned.

Blair.

Could you please leave? I want to be alone.

You're still my best friend.

In life, as in art, some endings are bittersweet, Especially when it comes to love.

So I know I sucked at the role of messenger, but I found this by the door, So I thought I'd try again.

Thanks.

Dan, I am going back to iowa, as you must have known.

I am sorry for everything.

As edith wharton wrote, "there is no one as kind as you, "no one who gave me reasons I Understood for doing what at first seemed so hard.

" Thank you.

r.

Sometimes fate throws two lovers together, only to rip them apart.

Miss blair is out, mr.

chuck.

I'll wait.

Sometimes the hero finally makes the Right choice but the timing is all wrong.

And as they say, timing is everything.

Hello, beautiful.

Carter.

What are you doing here? Buying you a drink.

Looks like this story might just have a second act.

Let's hope it's not a tragedy.

X.

o.

x.

o.

, gossip girl.

[bunniefuu]

(OG version)


WOMAN:
Where has she been?

GOSSIP GIRL:
And who am I?

That's one secret I'll never tell.

You know you love me. XOXO...

...Gossip Girl.

On the Upper East Side,
all the world's a stage...

...and the men and women
merely players.

But once a year,
Constance St. Jude's students...

...shed their usual roles and take on
new ones for the senior class play.

This year's pick:
The Age of Innocence.

NATE: I can't believe
this is a senior requirement.

Or that Chuck got a doctor to actually
diagnose him with acute stage fright.

Should have gone
with mercury poisoning.

GOSSIP GIRL: Before Gossip Girl,
there was Edith Wharton...

...and how little has changed.
The same society snobs still reigned...

...only in corsets
and horse-drawn carriages.

[ALL LAUGHING]

When I saw The Age of Innocence
I always pictured myself as Winona.

But playing the stronger,
more emotionally complex female lead...

...just feels so right.

Dorota, hair pin.

Besides, you're so much more suited
to play May...

...who's so witty.

-Thanks.
-At last my life is perfect.

My only problem:
how to relate to my character.

Countess Olenska
is a ruined woman with no prospects.

Let's face it,
I have the world on a string.

Of course, there is the odious task
of playing opposite Dan Humphrey.

Dorota, enough.
How are you two doing, BTW?

I'm just trying not to think of him.

Distracting myself
with other distractions.

-You mean your crush on our director?
-Julian is kind of amazing, isn't he?

-You know he directed--
-Bogosian Off-Broadway...

...in his last year of Juilliard?
Blah, blah, blah.

You can always depend on Constance
to snare some wunderkind.

But really, S.,
aren't you sick of brooding artists?

Well, he broods in the sexiest way.

That is,
when he's not looking right through me.

Oh, my life is so bountiful
I don't need a boyfriend to feel fulfilled.

NELLY:
Ah! Oh, my God. Come look.

But I do need silence
to emotionally prepare for the stage.

-What are you clucking about?
-Nelly just got in early to Yale.

That's impossible. Yale only accepts
one Constance student early a year. Me.

She just got an e-mail
directly from Dean Berube.

I have to find Headmistress Queller.

JENNY: Julian, I added the fur collar
to Olenska's dress.

Add fur to the cuffs. Humphrey?
This is an invited dress. Backstage now.

JENNY: I can't believe
I volunteered to do costumes.

Oh, for the days of Eleanor's atelier.
Wait, did I really just say that?

WOMAN: How does she even show
her face after...?

And remember,
in Scene 3 you enter from stage right...

-...not stage left.
-Stage left, right.

-No, no, stage right.
-Yeah, I got it.

I don't get why you wanna do
a documentary.

Are you kidding?

A high school forks out
a small fortune to stage a play...

...hires Broadway's
hottest up-and-coming director.

That means you got wealth,
privilege, atrocious acting.

You're doing The Age of Innocence,
that's the icing on the cake.

-Okay.
-But don't worry...

-...I won't make you look bad.
-Stop.

And whatever else...

...The Age of Innocence
is one of the most beautiful books ever.

It's like the most boring book ever.
Nothing happens.

Guy and girl wanna be together,
but can't.

Nate, the story's in the details.

The act of unbuttoning a glove
expresses the character's inner passion.

I can think of a lot more ways
to express my passion.

-Oh, really?
-Towards you.

Chuck Bass. It's good to see you, son.

Mr. Campbell, hello.

I'm sorry for your loss.

I was in Prague for the funeral.
I would have paid my respects in person.

-Thank you.
-I'll come by the office.

-I hear you're learning the ropes.
-I'm trying to.

-Enjoy.
-Thanks.

-Is this okay?
-Perfect.

[SPEAKING INDISTINCTLY]

My lucky day.
Carter Baizen back in town.

CARTER:
Always a delight to see you, Bass.

Elle? You're all right.

You have the wrong person.
My name is Hayley.

-What are you doing with this loser?
-Back off, Bass.

-The lady says she doesn't know you.
-She knows me.

You're in trouble. What help you need
you're not gonna find with him.

Carter, I have to use the ladies' room.
Get me a drink?

-Just wait a second.
-Come on. Don't cause a scene.

Heard you were in Thailand.
Should've come see me in Singapore.

-I had to leave in a hurry.
-Surprised you made it out in one piece.

I'm hooked up on every continent.

I landed last night.
Roll into Apotheke, I met....

Well, who really cares
what her name is.

God bless America.

Mr. Baizen? Your date just exited
through the kitchen.

Welcome home.

[DAN READING TEXT ON SCRIPT]

Hey, jacket over vest
and buttoned at the top.

Hello? What's wrong with you?

It's nothing. Did you see
how those teachers treated Rachel?

Yeah, they were like
grown up mean girls.

If I wrote a note, could you deliver it?

Dan, Headmistress Queller
told her to stay away from you.

I saw how they're treating her.
It's my fault.

I just wanna know that she's okay.

Hi, Miss Carr.
I love your necklace. Is it new?

-No, it's quite old, actually.
-Well, it's very nice.

Hi, I am gonna sit in front
until the first costume change.

-Jenny, I really don't think that--
-Thanks.

This is just a dress rehearsal.
There are people there--

Headmistress. There you are.

Nelly Yuki claims she got into Yale early.
There must be some mistake.

I'm sorry. There's no mistake.

I was on my way to tell you
I received a call from Dean Berube.

They've rescinded your acceptance
and given your spot to Nelly.

Is today April Fools'?

I'd previously informed Yale
of your detention.

I did not tell them
what the punishment was for.

But apparently,
an anonymous caller did.

The dean called
for me to confirm this story.

I had no choice.

-But I did penance for that.
-I explained that you made amends.

But Yale considers hazing
a faculty member a very serious offense.

I'm sorry.

-There must be something we can do.
-Blair, it's over.

You will not be attending Yale.

GOSSIP GIRL: Every actress eventually
finds the hook into her character...

...even if sometimes
life has to give her a little push.

Waldorf, you're holding up the curtain.
Come. Now.

Upon my soul, it's Countess Olenska
parading herself at the opera.

It's a pity. Her life is finished.

GOSSIP GIRL: But don't worry, B,
when God closes a door, he opens a play.

-Elle.
-I need your help.

Oh, did you tell my cousin Ellen
of our engagement?

-I hadn't had the chance.
-You must. She's been away so long--

-Did I miss much?
-No, just the first scene.

-Jenny, you dropped your wallet.
SERENA: Mother's carriage has arrived.

-Would you excuse me.
-Wait, can I--?

DAN: May knows as well as I the real
reason her cousin's staying away.

But I shall never let her see
the least sign...

...that I'm conscious of there being
a shadow on poor Olenska's reputation.

BLAIR:
Out of my way.

-I need to make a fat lady sing.
-It's stuck.

No, leave it.
She'll need as much padding as possible.

What is your problem?

My problem is a two-faced, four-eyed,
devious little snipe in a fat suit.

Did you think
you could rat me out to Yale?

-I don't know what you're talking about.
-Everyone's jealous. My life's perfect.

You've always been
the most jealous of all.

People aren't jealous of you, Blair.

They hate you. I didn't call Yale.
Good luck figuring out who did.

There are about a thousand people
who would relish taking you down.

[PHONES RINGING]

GOSSIP GIRL: Wanna hear the sickest
scandal ever? Remember B's lord?

Turns out he was giving the royal
treatment to his own Queen Mother.

And the worse part?
B knew and ignored it.

How desperate can you be, B?

No wonder Yale dumped you.
Who wants inbred legacies?

Someone's out to get you, Blair.
It's just not me.

Vanessa.

Julian, hey. I made the adjustment
you suggested in the garden scene.

Yeah, yeah. Good show, Sabrina.

How does it feel
to play May Welland?

Well, it feels like my character's
rubbing off on me.

May's fiancé pays no attention to her,
and as for me....

You talking about Julian?

Well, the play opens tomorrow.
He's just distracted.

Julian, hey. I was just thinking
it would be really helpful...

...for Vanessa's documentary
to hear about your vision for the show.

Why don't we grab a bite to eat?

I suppose it couldn't hurt
to give my actors...

...a little more insight
into my intentions.

Let me just grab my stuff.
I'll meet you in front.

Airing my dirty laundry to Yale...

...sending the Lord Marcus
Gossip Girl blast...

...makes you officially
my enemy number one.

I don't know what you're talking about,
Blair. Honestly.

What are you doing?
We hate her.

I don't hate her.
She's my friend, actually.

-And you just need to calm down.
-Calm down, Serena?

-She got me axed from Yale.
-Okay.

You're seriously taking her side? Fine.

But a word of advice.
She will be destroyed.

You don't wanna become
collateral damage.

Thank you.

I've been bathing like the French
in restaurant bathrooms all week.

So you've been on the run?

You know, I wanted to contact you.
I felt like we had a connection.

-But I was scared.
-And Carter?

I just met him. He told me he was rich,
so I thought he could help.

Please.

Look, no one's going to hurt you.

Are you kidding? You know
the kind of people who are members.

They're powerful men. The things I know
could destroy their lives.

Nobody told me
that once you're in you're in for good.

If only I could just leave the country.
Start over with a clean slate.

So that's what you'll do.
Money's not a problem.

We'll get you a new identity.
A new passport.

How?

I know a guy.

Thank you.

Hey. Just one question.

How do you feel about Brazil?

Scorsese said that he considers
Age of Innocence more violent...

...than his films with g*ns and blood.

-Marty's inspiration was The Heiress.
-William Wyler.

You're a Wyler fan?
Have you seen Little Foxes?

VANESSA:
Are you kidding?

Serena made me see it, like, what?
Three times?

She's obsessed with Bette Davis.

Yeah, Bette Davis. I....

I love her eyes.
Her hair is Harlow gold.

-Hey, listen. I'm gonna take off.
-I'll come with.

I was just gonna tell you
my take on the play.

Yes, that's a great idea.
Don't go. Please.

-Nate, do you mind?
-No, no. It's cool.

Listen, I have lines to practice anyway.
I'm gonna....

-So--
-You know, Nate's got the right idea.

I didn't realize how late it was.
Let me just grab the check.

Thank God. Serena, I know you like him,
but as your friend...

...Julian is the most self-absorbed,
pompous person I've ever met.

All he does is go on about movies.
It's annoying.

You were keeping up with him.

Yeah, and I'm totally annoying.

Thanks, ladies.
Don't worry, it's taken care of.

-And it's been a lot of fun.
-It has.

You know,
all this talk about Bette Davis...

...has got me thinking
about my character.

I could use some more coaching
before the show. What do you say?

Sure. Say, 4:00?
Text me your address.

Great.

-So, what are you up to?
-You mean, what are we up to?

I may not be a huge classic film buff,
but I have read Cyrano.

Hey, so when I finally came out,
you were gone. So...?

-You were great in the play. I just--
-No, I meant with Rachel.

Did she respond?

Yeah, she wrote a note.

Well, great. Where is it?

Dad has it.

-Mr. Humphrey--
-I believe this belongs to you.

GOSSIP GIRL: Poor Miss Iowa.
Caught playing Mrs. Robinson.

Looks like the teacher
just got schooled.

RUFUS: Dan, we need to talk.
-I've nothing to say.

I went to see Miss Carr. This thing
between the two of you, it's over.

-We'll see.
-You cannot be this short-sighted.

You'll be expelled.
Miss Carr will be fired for good.

Miss Carr sent me the key.
She understands.

-She's making her decision.
-However grown up you think you are...

-...you're still in high school.
-I care about Rachel, right? I'm 18.

With all due respect,
I think I'll decide who I see.

Oh, do go on, Newland.
I do love your description.

But why shouldn't we make them real?

We shall, my dearest.
Of course. Next year.

See, May is all about what's proper.

You've read other Wharton novels, right?
House of Mirth?

Yes. Yes, I have.

Good. House of Mirth
was a huge influence on Clayton.

Jack Clayton.
He directed The Great Gatsby.

-Jack Clayton. Gatsby.
-Critics consider it a failed adaptation.

No offense, Mr. Film Fanatic...

...I don't think the movie
was nearly as good as the book.

-I don't disagree. Why do you say so?
-Some blame Clayton's direction.

Others point the finger
at Coppola's screenplay.

-And The Times' Vincent Canby said--
-Whoa, slow down.

-Excuse me?
-No, excuse me.

It's just that sometimes my thoughts
come so fast that I get confused.

Sorry. From now on, I'll say a line,
and all you do is repeat it exactly.

The film is impotent. It totally misses
what the book is even about.

The eternal conflict
between the repression of society...

-...and the passion of the individual.
-You are so insightful, Julian.

I completely agree about
the power of unexpressed passion.

You know,
you are so insightful, Julian.

I completely agree about
the power of unexpressed passion.

I have to confess I underestimated you.
You're quite extraordinary.

Shall we get back to the scene?

What was that?

I'm sorry. Just one second. It's a text.

GOSSIP GIRL: Yale's hallowed halls
have gone to hell.

S got accepted,
but not for her SAT scores.

Allowing a press release
was her only prerequisite.

I have to go.

I lost track of time.
We're late for the theater. Ready to go?

Yeah. Yeah.

Good to see you, Hayley.

Or should I call you Elle?

Sorry I ran off.
I didn't know if I could trust you.

Baizen,
you know I'm not your biggest fan.

-You're an expert at crossing borders.
-I'm happy to oblige.

Especially if it means having
Chuck Bass owe me a favor.

But my passport guy
is a bit of a paranoid freak.

-He won't like an entourage.
-I understand.

Look, you take Elle,
and I'll meet you at Teterboro.

-Okay?
-Thank you. I'm so grateful.

Don't worry, Bass.
We'll take care of her.

I've lost everything.
I'm humiliated and shunned.

They've made me
a flesh and blood Countess Olenska.

You are an actress. Pour it into the role.
Use pain on-stage.

You're right.

I'm an actress.

No...

...I'm a seagull.

No, you're a shameless b*tch.

-Now what?
-Everything you've done.

Spreading rumors
about who I've had sex with...

...what alley I puked in...

...or telling Dean Berube
that I k*lled Pete Fairman.

I forgave everything.
I thought one day you'd grow up.

But putting out a Gossip Girl blast
about Yale and the press release--

I didn't put out the blast.

At least have the dignity
not to lie to my face.

-But I'm not lying.
-Two people knew about it.

You and Dan.
Dan would never do that.

I always want to believe
the best in you.

The bottom line is,
betrayal's in your nature.

I didn't do it, Dorota.

I believe you, Miss Blair.

If I didn't, Dan Humphrey did.
Vanessa told him about Marcus.

He could have put that out,
all to get back at me.

Do you know how hard it is to get
revenge when your enemy is changing?

You need to calm nerves
and warm vocal cord.

-You want tea?
-No.

I want Dan Humphrey's head
on a platter.

Rachel, I've been looking for you
We have to talk.

We need to stay away
from each other.

My dad showed up at your house.
We need to discuss this.

People are coming.

It was reckless of me to respond
to your note.

Rachel.

What are we doing?

I can't help myself.

Am I supposed to pretend
I'm not feeling what I'm feeling?

You know this can't last.

What can't?

Our staying away from each other.

SERENA: Oh, mother's carriage
has arrived. Do excuse me, dear.

Oh, of course.

-Hey.
-Hey.

What happened with Julian? We were
in the middle and you hung up.

I had to get off the phone.

I shall never let her see the signs
that I am conscious of there being...

...a shadow
on poor Ellen Olenska's reputation.

-I'll explain later.
GIRL: Next day, Mrs. Manson Mingott...

...received the couple at the house
in an inaccessible wilderness...

...in Central Park.

-Girl, bring me my fan.
-Yes. Right away, ma'am.

MAID:
Mr. Archer and Ms. Welland.

I was beginning to think you
were so besotted with love...

...you'd forgotten about
old grandmother.

And when is the wedding to be?

CHUCK: Thank you for meeting me.
-It was my pleasure, Chuck.

Your father was one
of my closest friends.

Which is why I was hoping
you could help me.

-My father was a member of a club--
-I can get you off the waiting list...

-...anyplace in town. Name it.
-I'm not talking racket sports.

This is a gentleman's club.
Carter Baizen is a member too.

-I'm not acquainted with Mr. Baizen.
-Yesterday. Park Avenue Winter.

You left right when he did.

I don't remember when I left and I don't
know anything about a gentleman's club.

The club moves every month.
There are girls there.

My, my, my.

Well, Chuck.

I have no idea
what you're talking about.

Someone I care about is in trouble.
This club has something to do with it.

Now, knowing my father was a member
it only stands to reason...

...that his closest friends were too.
When I go to the authorities...

...I'll have to suggest
they investigate everyone.

I'm sorry about your friend. But I don't
know anything that could help.

-Have a good evening.
-Mr. Campbell.

Please.

I care about her.

I can't say anything.

[PHONE BEEPS]

The great Uta Hagen
used to tell actors...

...give birth to the new person
you are to become.

Well, with act one behind you
and act two looming...

...my friends, you are still in labor.

I feel like I'm in labor.

Remember, being on-stage
is like standing on the edge of a cliff.

What saves you is the love and trust
you have in each other.

Also, the renowned New York Times
theater critic Charles Isherwood...

...is in the audience and if you
embarrass me, I will k*ll you. Now go.

Mr. Isherwood, thank you
so much for coming.

-Thank you.
-Are you enjoying the show?

Yes. Yes.

What happened?
You were supposed to get me.

I'm sorry.

You stood me up and your explanation
is sorry? Nate, what is going on?

Nate, I told you.
Your character went bankrupt.

Suffered total public humiliation,
not that you would understand that.

The characters in this play are
smoldering tempests of emotion.

You're as empty
as the Federal Reserve.

-Nate, wait.
-No. I gotta go work on...

...my smoldering tempest
of emotion.

-Don't you think that was a little harsh?
-Directors push buttons...

...to get performances.

Put your camera on a tripod.
Come watch the show.

BLAIR:
What a pretty carriage.

[DAN GRUNTS]

Every time I see you,
you happen to me all over again.

Ellen, you might be the most
honest woman I've ever met.

[AUDIENCE LAUGH]

[WHISPERS] What the hell are you doing?
-Oh, no. But one of the least fussy.

[WHISPERS] You're trying to ruin my life.
-You're insane.

[IN NORMAL VOICE]
You must know that this can't last.

What can't?

Our being together.

And not being together.

[WHISPERS] Don't try to gaslight me,
Humphrey. You're seeking revenge...

-...because I ruined your chances with--
-Not everyone plots revenge.

-You ought not to have come today.
-I look forward to seeing you.

Every thought is burnt up
in a great flame.

[WHISPERS] Someone is out to get me
and all signs point to you.

The only one who knew it all,
it has to be you.

[AUDIENCE APPLAUDING]

Six or seven days passed and Archer
heard nothing from Madame Olenska.

Then, one day the Newland Archers
received an invitation...

...to dine at Mrs. Mingott's.

-May, what a pretty gown.
-Oh, thank you.

-How are you feeling, granny?
NELLY: People tell me I'm old and ill.

But I feel perfectly fine.

Hey. Here.

Oh, that charm will prove useful
when Beauford arrives.

I want him to feel welcomed.

-Beaufort.
-Oh, right. Beaufort.

[AUDIENCE LAUGHING]

Granny.

-My child, your beauty never wanes.
SERENA: Ellen, it's been too long.

Much too long, cousin.

It was really great of Julian
to let Vanessa film it.

She says he's an amazing director.

-Is that right?
GIRL: Hey, that's your cue.

-Okay. Sorry.
-Go. Go.

Beaufort. So good of you to come.
They say you've been abroad.

Oh, yes. I've been, um--

-I've been, um--
-You--

-They say you've been abroad, right?
-Yes. I've, um--

I-- You know, what? Whatever.
You want feelings?

Well, I hate these clothes,
I hate this play...

...and I hate pretentious a*s hats who
try and steal other people's girlfriends.

In fact, I might just spontaneously
punch one next time you get in my face.

I know just how Mr. Beaufort feels.
Working so hard for something...

...and losing it because people
are out to destroy you.

Countess, at least you don't have
to go through your life...

...worried your best friend
will humiliate and betray you.

-I hate this fat suit.
-And there's one other thing.

My family lost all of our money before
my father went to jail for embezzlement.

So I think I know more about
humiliation and bankruptcy...

-...than some lame dilettante director.
DAN: What amusing companions you have.

-Oh, my God.
DAN: Why don't you retire to the parlor?

No. No one gives a damn about
the van der Luydens, Humphrey.

All right.

GOSSIP GIRL: Shakespeare says,
"All's well that ends well."

And sometimes, it just ends.

SERENA: Nate ruined everything.
It wouldn't have made a difference.

I stayed in character.

You high-school idiots
turned my play into a travesty...

...embarrassed me professionally--

It's Charles Isherwood.

Charles. Please, I can explain.

Explain what? I loved it. The classic
interpretation of the first act...

...juxtaposed with a radical
deconstruction of the second act.

-Genius.
-Really? You thought it was genius?

Yeah. I did. The repressed characters
melding with the actual kids...

...aggressively expressing their feelings.
How did you come up with it?

Oh, well, as soon as I saw
all that raw adolescent emotion...

...I knew I had to use it.

Harness it. Spin it into gold.

CHARLES: I look forward
to seeing what you do next.

-Great. Thank you for coming.
-Thanks.

Wow. That was a whole new level of
fake. I'm going to look for my boyfriend.

Good job.

You know, I don't know why
I ever had a crush on you.

Serena.

I'm g*y.

[KNOCKING]

Nate, what--
What happened up there?

I know you're into him. And I get it.
I mean, he's older, he's smarter.

And you guys like the same stuff.
I can't compete.

What?

I came to the gallery today.
And I heard you on the phone.

Are you talking about Julian?

I was talking to Serena. She was
with him. She likes him. Not me.

This is a total misunderstanding.

Well, you know,
that doesn't change the facts.

All right, I mean,
we have nothing in common.

I like ESPN.

-Okay? And you like books and movies.
-The way you say that....

You didn't bother to read Age of
Innocence. You didn't watch the DVD.

You're like a kid who swears
he hates tomatoes...

...and has never even tried one.

Well...

...maybe you should be with a guy
like Julian who already likes tomatoes.

Maybe if you'd put in some effort
you wouldn't be so insecure.

CHUCK:
Elle.

-Chuck.
-How did you--

Escape? They didn't wanna hurt me.
They wanted me to sign an agreement.

They gave me some cash
and told me to get out of town.

São Paulo awaits.

-São Paulo?
-Brazil.

I can help you get settled.
We can make a plan.

Chuck, I'm really grateful that you were
willing to help me.

But all I needed was someone
to give me money.

Now I have more than enough
and I've already made a plan.

By myself.

So you were just using me?

You've got a good heart. You should
give it to somebody who cares.

-Hi.
-That was some performance.

-It's nothing compared to yours.
-What do you mean?

You called Yale? Sent the blast
in to Gossip Girl to get revenge on Blair?

I believed in you. All your talk
about integrity and ideals.

My ideals? Blair spread false rumors,
blackmailed the school...

...turned my job into a sham
with no repercussions.

You're just as bad as she is.

No, you're worse. Blair is a high
schooler. You're an adult.

-You need to fix things with Blair.
-Absolutely not.

Know how you felt
when your ideals were crushed?

Well, congratulations.
You've crushed mine.

Hey, Blair. It's Rachel who's been
messing with you.

And we had sex
in the costume closet so you can...

...do whatever you want with that.

Student sex in the costume closet.

Is that what they mean
by heartland values?

-I at least expect a denial.
-No.

I don't deny it.

Well, the headmistress told me
my fate at Yale is sealed.

So the question is how do I make
your fate as bleak as mine?

I don't know
what's happened to me. I--

I don't know what I've become. I'm...

...so sorry.

Well, your punishment is...

...just live with it.

I should know.

It's not easy.

Serena.

So just so you know,
Blair isn't responsible...

...for sending out that blast
about you.

I am.

-You?
-Well, I told Rachel about Yale...

...wanting to put out the press release
and she sent it in to Gossip Girl.

But why would you do that?

I was trying to explain
that you aren't like the other girls.

-I gotta go find Blair.
-Yeah.

Thank you for telling me.

Hey.

I'm so sorry. And I get it if you don't
wanna talk to me right now.

But the fact is,
I come bearing snacks...

...hoping that we can cuddle on
the couch and watch ESPN.

Come here.

VANESSA: You're watching
The Age of Innocence?

It's heartbreaking.

So are you.

I am a way better Beaufort.

I'm sorry.

I know you were just looking out for me.
And Rachel, well, she--

She turned out to be not who I thought
she was. At least, not anymore.

I'm sorry too, son.

Dad, you were right about this.

But I think you need to give me space
to make my own mistakes.

Well...

...lucky for you,
you'll be at Yale soon.

You can make all the mistakes you
want with, God willing...

...girls your own age.

B, I've been looking
everywhere for you.

I know it was Rachel that sent
the Gossip Girl blast.

I'm sorry I didn't believe you.

Why would you?

What do you mean?

Believe me...

...nine times out of ten
I would have sent the blast.

Like you said, betrayal's in my nature.

-I didn't mean it.
-Spare me, Serena.

I don't need a stirring speech
telling me what a good person I am.

I know I'm not.

Yale kicking me out
is the karma I've earned.

Blair.

Could you please leave?

I wanna be alone.

You're still my best friend.

GOSSIP GIRL: In life, as in art,
some endings are bittersweet.

Especially when it comes to love.

So I know I sucked at the role of
messenger but I found this by the door.

So I thought I'd try again.

Thanks.

RACHEL: Dan, I'm going back to Iowa,
as you must've known.

I'm sorry for everything.
As Edith Wharton wrote...

..."There is no one as kind as you."

No one who gave me reasons I
understood for doing...

...what at first seemed so hard.

Thank you. R.

GOSSIP GIRL: Sometimes, fate throws two
lovers together, only to rip them apart.

Ms. Blair is out, Mr. Chuck.

I'll wait.

GOSSIP GIRL: Sometimes, the hero
finally makes the right choice...

...but the timing is all wrong.

And as they say, timing is everything.

Hello, beautiful.

Carter.

What are you doing here?

Buying you a drink.

GOSSIP GIRL: Looks like this story
might just have a second act.

Let's hope it's not a tragedy.

XOXO. Gossip Girl.