Gossip girl here your one and only source into the scandalous lives of manhattan's elite.
You got into Brown.
The letter came while you were away.
Congratulations.
You said you could call in a favor at N.
Y.
U.
Did you mean it? I can only get you an interview.
It's gonna be up to you to wow him.
You got your money.
That's all that matters.
Now you can go to - I'm going to N.
Y.
U.
Now.
Great.
Then I'll see you next year.
Oh, my god.
You're Nate Archibald.
And you're Bree Buckley.
It's good to see you again.
I made some new friends, one in particular.
Oh.
So you are dating someone? His name's Scott, and I think you guys Would really like each other.
Yeah, mom, everything's great.
I have been waiting all summer for reed to start, And tomorrow's the day I get to do what I came here for.
I know secrecy is a lot to ask for, - But I really can't risk making my family more upset right now.
Don't worry.
I'm good at secret relationships.
What if your dad didn't want to see you? Who cares? Who the hell is he not to want you? I would've stayed all summer with you.
Vanessa, I'm I'm not changing.
I don't care if you're rich, which you aren't, by the way.
If you're gonna be in this world, be yourself in this world.
Is there anything else? I'd like to request a roommate Blair Waldorf.
She's my best friend, and I just can't wait to live with her.
And who am I? That's a secret I'll never tell.
You know you love me.
X.
o.
x.
o.
Gossip Girl.
Every fall, confident high school seniors transform into nervous college freshmen.
They leave their parents' homes for the hallowed halls of higher education.
And like any new venture, starting college holds the promise Of limitless opportunity.
The opportunity to conquer a new territory * The facts and the figures * * They overwhelm and stifle * * Everything * * That you thought you knew * Or to try and be a little less lonely * The facts and the figures * * They overwhelm and stifle * But just because the opportunity presents itself * That you think make a difference * Doesn't mean everybody is ready to take it.
Mmm.
You're so sweet to see me off.
I can't believe N.
Y.
U.
orientation week.
is finally here.
I have to object to you living in the dorms.
Fluorescent lighting, communal showers, Public school girls? There's a place for that, and it belongs in the back of a video store.
It's not for long.
I can't rule the N.
Y.
U.
Masses from the upper east side.
I need to spend time in the dorm to establish myself as queen.
It's not Constance, Blair.
The only queens at N.
Y.
U.
are the ones with tickets to see Liza at carnegie hall.
Chuck, I trust that when you say, "never drink absinthe with Daniel Baldwin," You know what you're talking about.
But when I say the first week of college means.
Scared, vulnerable freshmen needing someone to guide them, That I know what I'm talking about.
And I'm very excited for you.
So you haven't called Vanessa yet? - No, she's the one who's out of line.
She's gotta call me.
Or you could just get over it.
After all these years, You guys are finally gonna be at the same school.
I guess you're right.
It's probably not the best idea To be avoiding my only friend at N.
Y.
U.
For the record, Dan, I don't think You're gonna have any trouble making friends there.
Right, because the The world of greenwich village intelligentsia is Dan Humphrey's natural habitat.
You're so lucky.
N.
Y.
U.
is exactly the right place for you.
Like Brown is for you.
Serena? Um Sorry.
Uh, yeah.
You know what? I should finish packing.
But good luck, Dan.
Hey, I'm sorry.
Are you Dan Humphrey? Uh, yeah.
Like the Dan Humphrey who was published In the "20 under 20" issue of "the new yorker"? Uh, yeah.
Large coffee, please.
I'm Katie, and I'm not usually an eavesdropping stalker.
It's just that I read your piece, and it was amazing.
What? Really? Wow.
That's that thank you.
Yeah, well, at first I hated you because I also submitted, But then I read it and I was like, Okay, fine.
I accept defeat at your hands, Dan Humphrey.
Anyway, I have a writer's group.
We meet every week.
We're meeting here at noon tomorrow.
You should come.
Car's downstairs.
You ready? - As I'll ever be.
Today's a big day, You and Dan both off college.
Yeah, I know.
I know.
Uh, I should get going.
Your mom's so proud of you.
So am I.
Hey.
Uh, Scott, you remember Dan.
Dan, this is Scott.
Yeah.
No, it's, uh, it's good to finally officially meet you.
Uh, so are you two dating now? Last I heard you were just friends Yeah, you actually have to call me to find out what's going on in my life.
Oh, well, okay.
I didn't realize we were speaking.
Oh, god.
Of course she's in a limo.
Ew.
Let's make it clear from the start.
We don't know each other here.
Works for me.
Me, too.
Well, hello, sis.
I assume you need a few ounces of study aid for Brown.
No.
I need a place to stay.
I'm not going to Brown.
Yes, we may all be freshmen and new to N.
Y.
U.
and the dorms, but that doesn't mean We have to embarrass ourselves.
I can tell from looking around this room that none of you are from new york city.
Actually, I'm from Riverdale doesn't count.
Anyway, I won't be holding The sad truths of your hometowns against you.
In fact, I want to help you.
For example, who can tell me Which is the only club to be seen at on a saturday night? I read marquee.
Wrong.
You should never be seen at a club on a saturday night.
It's strictly bridge and tunnel on the weekends.
You're welcome.
Now Dorota and I have put together some gift bags filled with essentials for everyone.
I think you don't need week to run school.
You do it in one day.
I know.
This is going even better than I'd hoped.
And the best part is I seem to have a single.
Sorry I'm late.
Blair? Blair Waldorf? Oh, my gosh! Oh, my gosh.
I can't believe it! We're roommates! Rah rah, sis boom bah.
Georgina's pulled a coup date.
Welcome to college, b.
This is gonna be a blast.
Following me to N.
Y.
U.
? Becoming my roommate? I'm gonna have Dorota file a restraining order.
I mean, you're overreacting.
The roommate thing is just a coincidence.
Besides, my parents said it was either bible camp or college, - So go, bobcats! - So you're not in love with jesus anymore? Oh, I still hold him in my heart, But jesus and I have redefined our relationship.
You mean he dumped you because he found out you were satan! This could actually be a good thing, Blair.
Look.
Manolos.
Size 7, just like you.
Let me know if you want to borrow.
I'll win, you know.
I ruled at constance and I will rule here, - And you can't stand in my way.
Are you still playing this tired old game? Oh, please.
Like you're not? No, I'm not.
I'm actually here for a fresh start.
Oh, no.
Vanessa, you're in our dorm, too? Yay! Your dorm? Yeah, um, my room's just down the hall.
So, uh That's awesome.
Oh! Isn't this so pretty? I'm gonna hang it up.
* The facts and the figures * * They overwhelm and stifle * Oh, Miss Blair.
What are we going to do? Call police? No.
We're going to throw a party.
I go to Masa, see if they will cater.
Pardon me.
I was packing and talking to Blair about her classes, And then it hit me.
I wasn't excited about any of it.
I don't know what I want to do yet, And and going off to a new place to figure that out? I don't know.
I'm just I'm not ready for that.
Look, sis, for people like us, A college degree is just an accessory, Like a Malawi baby or a poodle.
Well, it's an accessory my mother really wants me to have.
So you want to hide out at the Bass cave until you figure it out.
Yeah, if it's okay with you.
Nobody knows about this,Not even Blair.
Blair would be even more upset than my mother.
I couldn't help but notice you and Carter Baizen At the Van Der Bilt Polo party.
This doesn't have anything to do with him, does it? No, absolutely not.
I haven't even seen him since then.
Good.
Just one favor.
I'm having a meeting here tonight, So if you can clear out for a few hours.
Chuck, I don't mind if your dealer comes by.
Jesse is in St.
Barths this week.
This is something more legitimate.
You know the old art deco bank On 72nd between Madison and park? The one that went under last month? I want to make it into a speakeasy.
In the front an elegant restaurant, But down in the vault, an after hours locale, devoted to indecency, disreputable behavior and all manner of debauchery.
A kind of homage to the last time the market crashed.
The harder the times, The harder people want to party and forget about it.
Chuck.
This is really a great idea.
I I can't believe Blair hasn't told me about this yet.
She doesn't know.
Nobody does.
I just wanted to wait till I was sure it was going through.
You know, my father turned his first profit by the time he was 22.
I hope to do it by the time I'm 21.
* It's a fragile world * * Susceptible to * Let me guess.
Uh, women in literature, professor Schweik? You know I'm a sucker for stories about scorned women.
I got the same.
I think the universe is trying to tell us something.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
I should have called you.
No, it's it's okay.
I wouldn't have wanted to call me either After the way I came down on you at the party.
Um So Scott? Yeah, he's he's so great, And he really wants to get to know you.
Oh, my god.
I have so much to tell you.
You are never gonna guess who lives in my dorm.
Hey, guys.
Oh.
Oh! - Sorry to interrupt.
I just saw you, and I thought, um So I really just want to apologize for everything that happened in the past.
I've got my meds straightened out, And I'm really in a much better place now.
So I come to N.
Y.
U.
hoping for a fresh start, - And who do I get as my roommate? Blair Waldorf.
What? - I told you we have so much to catch up on.
I mean, I wish I had some other friends here, you know? You guys are are really lucky to have each other.
Anyway, I should go.
Okay, this is probably too much, But would you guys want to have a cup of coffee with me? Uh Look, Georgina, I appreciate that you want a clean slate, but I think it would kind of be too much.
I'm sorry.
No, of course.
I I mean, I I totally understand.
I'd feel the same way.
I'll see you around.
Maybe we were a little bit too harsh.
What? It's it's Georgina.
And you're Dan.
And you're Vanessa.
This is a fun game.
I'm sorry.
I just thought you were A little bit more forgiving than that.
Are you are you really trying to make me the bad guy here? No, it's just we want a fresh start and and so does she.
Okay.
I know you're new to the whole school thing, But you don't want Georgina as your friend.
I mean, she's gonna scare everyone away.
Georgina.
Hey.
What's gonna happen next week when we start classes? That's why we have my family's apartment.
And plus, you know, all this sneaking around, making sure the doorman doesn't see you, not answering the phone when my mother calls I mean, you know it adds a layer of hotness.
What are you saying? That our hotness is only purely circumstantial.
And that if we were out in the real world, We'd like each other less? Mm.
You know that if we really started dating, after a few months, you'd realize that you hate the way that I laugh, I couldn't stand the way that you chew, And then we'd break up.
That's a very romantic story, you know, But It doesn't have to be like that.
Care to make a bet? I got an idea.
I will hole up with you for the next 24 hours, and we can fast-forward through the entire relationship.
Leave the seat up, sing Timberlake in the shower.
Ah, watch TV shows you really like As opposed to ones you're supposed to like? What do you say you, me, this apartment? Let's get sick of each other.
Okay.
As you can see, the restaurant would be elegant.
Seasonal menu, extensive wine list.
You know, the space is big, But I want it to have a more intimate feel.
And how would you be using the vault space? It's perfect for storage.
I have to be honest.
Give your reputation, when you made your bid, the board was very concerned.
I completely understand.
The neighbors don't want some raucous club coming in and disrupting the quiet.
And believe me, I wouldn't want to bring that element to the area.
I'll be right down.
Ok, I got it.
I got it.
Sorry.
I'm not here.
My heel broke.
Stepsister.
I apologize.
My lawyer.
Excuse me.
Sorry for interrupting your meeting.
Not at all.
We were just finishing up anyway.
Oh, are you are you leasing Chuck the bank space? Mm-hmm.
He has a real vision.
I know.
Turning the vault into a club, it's genius.
Serena.
Excuse me? Thank you.
Cool party.
I'm Amalia.
I'm glad people understand the concept of being fashionably late, But this is ridiculous.
I think everybody's Down the hall, watching a movie or something.
What? Please.
Ease up on the toro.
He has to answer to a board, Serena.
And board members tend not to approve of clubs with coat check girls who give happy endings.
It was an honest mistake.
When he was talking about your plans Look, why do you think I asked you to go out tonight? Because I knew something like this would happen.
Fine.
Then I'll go.
Train wreck.
Great job, Vanessa.
That was awesome.
Oh.
Hey, Blair.
Oh, my god.
We just finished watching Vanessa's documentary about this community garden in her neighborhood.
It was amazing.
No, it wasn't.
Yes, it was.
I I mean, Vanessa, tears.
Actual tears.
When that g*ng member picked up his first carrot okay, screening is over.
The c*ck party has officially begun in the common room.
Sake-tinis.
And is that my invitation being used as a coaster? Um, thanks so much, Blair, But we actually just scarfed, like, four pizzas, And Vanessa's about to show us Her bootleg Michel Gondry videos.
Georgina, please.
Nobody wants greasy pizza and Vanessa's home movies when there's a sushi and sake party right in the other room.
Did I mention wasabi facials? Okay, then.
And shut the door? Spotted Blair Waldorf going from V.
I.
P.
to V.
D.
Poor Blair.
How are you going to cure this one? Morning.
Hey.
Thanks for letting me crash here last night.
Harboring an ivy league fugitive? I'm your man.
I made you breakfast.
I have to go, but remember, we don't have any servants here, So if you see anybody else in the loft besides me, Call the police.
It's not the chef.
Good to know.
So did classes start already? Uh, no, just orientation stuff.
But, uh, i did join a literary group.
More people have talked to me at N.
Y.
U.
In one day Than my entire four years at St.
Jude's.
Well, i'm not surprised.
I can totally see why people would love you there.
Oh, about Brown Uh, you really should think about talking to my dad.
He might ramble a lot, he might nervously strum his guitar, But, uh, when it comes to fatherly advice, I don't know, he's pretty much the best there is.
Do you want one? - Thanks.
Come to the party.
Come to the party.
Thanks.
It's gonna be really fun.
We'll be there.
Oh, fantastic.
Oh.
So if you're not trying to sabotage me, then what is this? First you deliberately ruin my sushi party, And now you're making your move.
This paranoia has got to stop, Blair.
I am not paranoid.
I'm right.
Why else would you have formed an alliance with Vanessa, The one person I may hate more than you? It's not an alliance.
It's a friendship.
Unlike you, Vanessa's cool and people like her, More than the weird girl who threw the fish party.
Sushi.
There was toro.
Face it, Blair.
Once upon a time, in a far-off land, You were a queen.
Here you're just a loser who will never fit in.
So you won't be needing that.
Hey, guys.
Do you want to come to my party? - You can have one, too.
You're really pretty.
Thank you.
Rufus? Hello? What are you doing here? Rufus and I were just catching up.
But I have to prepare for a meeting tonight.
Thank you for the waffles.
Look, I I don't know what kind of twisted spin Chuck put on things, But I actually wanted to talk to you about this.
Rufus, I'm having doubts about going to Brown.
Well, I'm sorry about that, But to lie about leaving for college? I mean, between the show you put on for the paparazzI all summer And the craziness at the polo party last week and this, I don't know what's going on with you.
I know.
I'm sorry I lied.
I just didn't want to upset my mom.
Well, at least we agree about that, Which is why you can repack your things and go to Brown today.
I'll have a car here within an hour.
As long as you're in it, there's no reason - Lily ever has to know about this.
Or what, you'll tell on me? Wow.
I feel really emotionally supported - in making this life-changing decision.
It's not a decision.
It's a mistake, - which is why I'm--I'm trying to get you not to make it.
By threatening me.
Do you know you're more afraid of my mother than I am? You know what, Rufus? Go ahead.
Call her.
You can let her know I'm not going to Brown.
Thanks for the talk.
What do you want? Hey.
I was wondering if you want to go out tonight.
I thought you were at Brown.
No, I'm not.
In fact, after I hang up with you, I will be withdrawing my admission.
There's nobody I'd rather celebrate with.
So are you in or out? See you tonight.
No, I'm telling you, I learned everything I need to know about women From Judy Blume's "Forever.
" Can I talk to you? Uh, yeah.
Yeah.
What's up? I was wondering Do you have a date to Georgina's party? Forget the four horsemen.
The real evidence our world is coming to an end Blair Waldorf needing Dan Humphrey To rescue her from social extinction.
You OK? I just feel like I got off on the wrong foot here, And I want to start again.
So Thanks for bringing me,Humphrey.
Oh.
Uh,yeah.
Well,you know,I I would just like to think That if I needed it, somebody would do the same for me.
Although, let's be honest, we both know it wouldn't be you.
Oh.
No headbands in college,okay? * She was so shy * * Till I drove her wild * * I make them good girls go bad * * I make them good girls * - Katie.
Hey,guys.
Blair, you, uh, you remember Katie? Yeah.
Cute necklace.
Thank you.
I love your How how about I get us all drinks and you two talk? Just not about high school, please.
What's up, Dan? So was everyone at your high school Totally jealous of Dan for being such a great writer? Dan's a writer? She was so shy Till I drove her wild Oh.
Hey, Dan.
Hey.
Um,listen.
I'm sorry about yesterday.
I I was out of line.
Please don't don't even worry about it.
I mean,you have every right to be upset.
I'm just really glad you're here.
Thanks.
Okay,so am I really drunk, Or did I just see you walk in with Blair? Look, you wanted me to give you a second chance.
Don't you think you should give one to Blair? She's not looking for a second chance.
She's looking for a way in.
People like you here, Dan, and Blair sees that.
I'm sorry.
I've been the person not welcome at parties, And if I'm now on the other side of things, I'm I'm not gonna treat people the way I was treated, - Even if it's Blair.
I'm just trying to look out for you.
Trust me.
You're being used.
Have fun.
* Oh * * Yeah * * Good girls go * Gross! With your mother's L.
L.
Bean catalog? Ugh.
A cargo short fetish Definitely goes in the "minus" column.
What are you talking about? I was, like, 12 years old.
Speaking of pants, pass yours over here.
What do you need my pants for? - Because I want to see what's in them.
Come on.
Show me all your secrets.
Have a look.
It's just normal stuff.
Normal stuff, huh? All right.
See? Hmm? Keys, cell phone.
A boarding pass From London.
Don't tell me that you've been wearing these pants since we met, because that really would be gross.
No, I If you must know, I kept it.
Ah.
And he has a sentimental streak.
Hey, I thought your theory was that If we really got to know each other, we'd break up.
Mm.
Maybe I'm revising my theory.
* You were a problem child.
* To you.
Brown's loss is my gain.
Thank you.
You know, when you called, I tried not to answer.
Great.
Chuck Bass.
Let's get out of here.
No.
Come on.
Since when do you run away from Chuck Bass ? It looks like he's having a business meeting.
This could be fun.
* You're a hot mess * No way.
Serena, Carter, this isn't a good time.
Well, then let's make it one.
What's wrong, Chuck? Aren't you happy to see us? - You know, Carter and I were Just sharing our favorite Chuck Bass stories.
There were so many we had to break them into categories.
What were we up to, international affairs? - Oh, there was a time when, uh, Chuck And the Italian Ambassador's son Were asked to leave an Amsterdam brothel.
Now that's an accomplishment.
Simple misunderstanding.
None of us spoke any Dutch.
Oh! My gosh.
Is this is this a business meeting? I'm I'm sorry if you sense any tension.
Those two don't like each other that much 'Cause they share the same taste in women.
Sometimes they share the actual women.
That's enough.
So what's this business meeting about, Bass? - Still trying to fill your daddy's shoes? - Yeah, Chuck, come on.
Tell him your idea.
I'm opening a restaurant.
Yeah, that's what he's telling people, But downstairs, in the vault, he's creating a club.
What did you say? You wanted to redefine decadence? You wanted to ruin my deal, So you came here and brought Carter Baizen as your wingman.
I told Rufus about Brown Because I was actually concerned for you.
I'm sorry to have wasted your time.
Are you insane? "battlestar" kicks "T.
N.
G.
" ' a*s.
What other show on the history of the planet Has been asked to speak at the U.
N.
? Oh, perfect.
An organization that condemns terrorism while secretly funding it hosts a panel for a show that glorifies t*rrorists.
Dude, I can't even look at you right now.
Fine.
Don't look.
What do you think? Trust me.
You don't want to know.
I do.
I do want to know.
Oh, thank God.
* Moving in an elliptical pattern * Man, I'm really glad you decided to come to the party.
Oh, thanks, man.
That's Vanessa cares about you a lot, And I know that she was hoping you'd come.
You know -Yeah, yeah, I know.
There he is.
Oh, speak of the devil.
Hey.
To, uh, to fresh starts.
I'm happy you're here, Humphrey.
Me, too.
So, Scott, you are in big trouble.
I cannot believe you told Vanessa to take professor Rifkin - For art in the world.
Why? I mean, I liked him.
Dude, he's totally old school, not to mention just plain old.
I mean, his lecture notes are literally turning yellow with age.
Please do tell.
What other professors are you recommending? Yeah, let's hear it, because katie's gonna have - To weigh in from now on.
I I'm at a party.
I really don't feel like taking a test right now.
Excuse me, everyone.
Can you please stop with that noise? - Hi, everyone.
What the hell? Well, most of you don't know me.
My name is Blair Waldorf.
But a lot of you know My roommate, who threw this amazing party Georgina.
Georgina! Yeah, I know.
Georgina rocks, right? I mean, it's funny, 'cause I never knew That a Jesus freak could throw such a good party, But I guess I was wrong.
So, everyone, raise a glass Or a Plastic cup of foam To the coolest christian I know Georgina Sparks.
What do you know, what do you know What do you know about Jesus? What do you know, what do you know What do you know about the lord? What do you know, what do you know about Jesus And his love? Oh My God.
This is a conversion party.
I can't believe it.
Georgina threw this party And invited all her friends here To convert the vulnerable freshmen.
It seems that Blair Waldorf has finally found Jesus And invited him to crash Georgina's party.
Carter, wait.
So that's the whole reason You wanted me to go out with you tonight You knew i'd help you screw over Chuck.
Chuck had screwed me over or or at least I thought he had.
I wanted to get him back.
Serena, listen to you.
What's your deal? You're acting out 'cause daddy doesn't love you? - Is that why you skipped out on Brown, too? - Please.
No.
I told you how I felt, and you blew me off Until you needed someone to do your dirty work.
It's time to find a new bad habit, 'Cause it's not gonna be me anymore.
V.
I.
P.
V.
I.
P.
Room at the Monkey Bar.
Monkey Bar.
Can't wait.
The limo's waiting downstairs.
We were worried about you.
We missed you so much.
I can't tell you how my heart filled with joy When we got your call inviting us to share his glory - With all of your new friends.
I didn't invite you here.
We thought our little lamb had been lost for good.
I am lost for good.
This isn't East Ridge High School prom.
Bye.
Hello.
Hey, uh, excuse me.
Could I get everyone's attention, please? Hey.
Hi.
Hello.
I'm Dan.
I just want to let everybody know here.
That, uh, Blair Waldorf over there invited some people from Georgina's past, just so she could embarrass her.
But you know, we'rewe're all starting college here, and college is supposed to be a place where you're not judged by what you believe oror the friends you make.
You're here to make new friends and start over, right? So last time I checked, I mean, I think - I think thisthis party's pretty fun.
Yeah? - Yeah.
Yeah, okay.
So Who wants to leave with Blair? All right, and who wants to stay here and drink cheap beer with me? It's a no-brainer.
* She was so shy till I drove* Thank you.
You didn't have to do that.
Yeah, I did.
* I make them good girls go bad * Let's get a beer.
* I make them good girls go bad * Uhoh, B.
Looks like your new flock was just led astray, and by Dan Humphrey no less.
I guess they know a force profit when they see it.
Hi.
You mind if I join you? - It's your home.
Dan told you I was here? I was glad you felt like you could come here, that you felt like this was a safe place.
I'm really sorry, Rufus.
I never meant for it to get this messed up.
None of it was your fault.
Well, I didn't help matters.
I shouldn't have blown up at you the way that I did.
So Talk to me.
Well, um I called Brown and deferred for a year.
Okay.
It may have been for the wrong reasons at the time, II think.
Well, no, II know that it was the right decision.
I would have just been going because my mom wanted me to go, and while that's a good reason, that's not good enough.
You know, I did the same thing.
Well,it was Rutgers, not Brown, but I got in and I realized that if I didn't pursue music, I'd never do it.
I wish I had that same sense of purpose.
But I hope that if Iif I take this time, that I'll find it.
Gosh.
How am I gonna tell my mom? Maybe I could help you figure that out.
I know I'm not the first guy that your mom's brought into your life, But if you and Eric will let me, I'd really like to be more to you than than just Lily's most recent husband.
Let me help you with this.
Wow.
I, uh I would really appreciate that, Rufus.
I'm sorry, mom.
It wasn't my intention to embarrass you or daddy.
Look, I wouldn't be doing any of this, if I didn't feel the way that I do.
I really, really like him, and Mom, please.
Don't be like that.
Mom? I guess we didn't fool the doorman.
So you told your mom the truth? I didn't want to risk everything with my family for some fling that wasn't gonna last.
But? Well, if your family can accept us together, maybe one day mine will, too.
And if not? It's a risk that I'm willing to take.
There's a reason we never went downtown It's awful.
The minute you cross 14th street, people forget there's a class system.
B, you will find your place.
Just give it time.
No, I found my place, and it's at the bottom.
It's a point of pride now that I see who's on top.
Anyway, it's all turned out for the best.
If I hadn't been so distracted, I would've been able to force you to go to Brown.
That's sweet, but no, you wouldn't have.
I am sorry I pulled a disappearing act on you.
I'm sure you'll find a way to make it up to me In the handbag department at Bendel's.
Now normally I'd be more worried about Brown, but you actually seem a lot better than you have in a while.
I really am.
It was so much easier when it was just about where we sat on the met steps.
Yeah, but we've We've been here, done this.
But I was so good at it.
Well Then it's time for a new challenge For both of us.
I'm glad you're not going to Brown.
I need you here.
Same.
Mm.
Bye.
Bye, you.
I'm sorry I'm late, but I have a good excuse.
What is this? A review of all the professors I had this summer.
And look, I even gave them grades.
Wow.
This is amazing.
I'm sorry For that weird moment with Katie last night.
I think I got a little, um, overwhelmed from meeting all your friends.
That's okay.
That was kind of the least weird part of the whole night.
Yeah, when Dan He got on the mike and he convinced everyone to stay at the party, that was insane.
Is he usually like that? No.
Dan is more of a corner-of-the-party guy.
Should I call him, see if he'll join us? Call him later.
I just want to be with you right now.
What do you want, Serena? There's a reason I always come back to you, Carter.
And it's not because you're my bad habit.
What then? You're the only one who understood why I needed to find my father.
You were there for me during all of that, and I trust you.
Anyone would have done the same thing.
No, they wouldn't have.
And I don't want anyone else.
I want you.
Mm.
You were right about the dorms.
The lighting is awful.
Are you okay? Mm.
I am now.
* We are all embers through all of the devilish things we do * * From the same fire through all of the devilish things we do * * We are all embers through all of the devilish things we do * * From the same fire through all of the devilish things we do * Hello? Hey.
Do you want to meet me and Scott so we can download about the epicness last night? Mm.
No, you know, I'm still a little wrecked.
So, uh, I'll I'll call you later.
Okay.
Bye.
* We are all embers from the same fire.
We are all embers * Apparently, higher education doesn't make for smarter decisions.
So take out your notebooks and sharpen your pencils, kids.
Gossip girl's going to college, and this class has a lot to learn.
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3x02 - The Freshman
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Privileged teens living on the Upper Eastside of New York City. You know you love me. xoxo
Privileged teens living on the Upper Eastside of New York City. You know you love me. xoxo
Re: 3x02 - The Freshman
(OG version)
WOMAN:
Where has she been?
GOSSIP GIRL:
And who am I?
That's one secret I'll never tell.
You know you love me. XOXO...
...Gossip Girl.
GOSSIP GIRL: Every fall,
confident high school seniors...
...transform into nervous
college freshmen.
They leave their parents' homes for
the hallowed halls of higher education.
And like any new venture...
...starting college holds the promise
of limitless opportunity.
The opportunity
to conquer a new territory.
Or to try and be a little less lonely.
But just because
the opportunity presents itself...
[CELL PHONE BEEPS]
...doesn't mean everybody
is ready to take it.
You're so sweet to see me off.
I can't believe NYU orientation week
is finally here.
I have to object to you living
in the dorms. Florescent lighting...
...communal showers,
public school girls?
There's a place for that and it belongs
in the back of a video store.
It's not for long.
I can't rule the NYU masses
from the Upper East Side.
I need time in the dorm
to establish myself as queen.
It's not Constance, Blair.
The only queens at NYU are the ones
with tickets to see Liza at Carnegie Hall.
Chuck, I trust that when you say "never
drink absinthe with Daniel Baldwin"...
...you know
what you're talking about.
But when I say the first week of college
means scared, vulnerable freshmen...
...needing someone to guide them,
I know what I'm talking about.
And I'm very excited for you.
You haven't called Vanessa?
-She's gotta call me.
-You could get over it.
After all these years,
you guys'll be at the same school.
It's probably not the best idea
to avoid my only friend at NYU.
I don't think you're gonna have
any trouble making friends there.
The World of Greenwich Village
intelligentsia...
...is Dan Humphrey's natural habitat.
You're so lucky.
NYU is exactly the right place for you.
Like Brown is for you?
-Serena?
-Um....
Sorry. Yeah, you know what, I should
finish packing. But good luck, Dan.
-Hey, I'm sorry, are you Dan Humphrey?
-Uh, yeah.
The Dan Humphrey who was published
in the issue of The New Yorker?
Uh, yeah.
[CHUCKLES]
Large coffee, please. I'm Katie.
And I'm not usually
an eavesdropping stalker.
It's just that I read your piece.
It was amazing.
What? Really? Wow, that's--
Thank you.
Yeah, well, at first I hated you
because I also submitted.
But then I read it and I was like:
"Okay, fine. I accept defeat
at your hands, Dan Humphrey."
Anyway, I have a writers' group.
We meet every week.
We're meeting here at noon tomorrow.
You should come.
[DOOR KNOCKS]
-Car's downstairs. You ready?
-As I'll ever be.
Today's a big day.
You and Dan both off to college.
Yeah, no, I know. I should get going.
Your mom's so proud of you.
So am I.
[INAUDIBLE DIALOGUE]
-Hey.
-Scott, you remember Dan. Dan, Scott.
Yeah, it's good to finally
officially meet you.
You dating now?
I heard you were friends.
-You actually have to call to find out.
-Okay, I didn't realize we were speaking.
-Oh, God.
VANESSA: Of course she's in a limo.
BLAIR:
Eww.
Let's make it clear from the start:
We don't know each other here.
-Works for me.
-Me too.
[DOOR KNOCKS]
Well, hello, sis.
I assume you need a few ounces
of study aid for Brown.
No. I need a place to stay.
I'm not going to Brown.
BLAIR: We may all be freshmen
and new to NYU and the dorms...
...but that doesn't mean
we embarrass ourselves.
I can tell that none of you
are from New York City.
GIRL: Actually, I'm from--
-Riverdale doesn't count.
I won't be holding the sad truths
of your hometowns against you.
In fact, I want to help you.
For example:
Who can tell me which is the only club
to be seen at on a Saturday night?
-I read Marquee.
BLAIR: Wrong.
You should never be seen at a club
on Saturday night.
It's strictly bridge and tunnel
on the weekends.
Dorota and I
have put together gift bags...
...filled with essentials for everyone.
I think you don't need week
to run school, you do it in one day.
I know. This is going even better
than I had hoped.
The best part is
I seem to have a single.
Sorry I'm late.
Blair? Blair Waldorf? Oh, my gosh.
[GIGGLES]
Oh, my gosh. I can't believe it.
We're roommates.
GOSSIP GIRL: Rah, rah, sis boom bah,
Georgina's pulled a coup d'état.
Welcome to college, B.
This is gonna be a blast.
Following me to NYU?
Becoming my roommate?
I'm gonna have Dorota
file a restraining order.
I mean, you're overreacting.
The roommate thing is a coincidence.
My parents said it was
either Bible camp or college. So...
-...go Bobcats!
-So you're not in love with Jesus?
I still hold him in my heart. Jesus
and I have redefined our relationship.
He dumped you.
He found you were Satan.
This could actually be a good thing,
Blair.
Look. Manolos.
Size seven just like you.
-Let me know if you wanna borrow.
-I'll win, you know.
I will rule here.
You can't stand in my way.
-Are we still playing this game?
BLAIR: Oh, please. Like you're not.
GEORGINA:
I'm not. I'm here for a fresh start.
VANESSA:
Oh, no.
Vanessa? You're in our dorm too?
Yay.
Your dorm? Yeah,
my room's just down the hall, so....
That's awesome.
Oh! Isn't this so pretty?
I'm gonna hang it up.
[CELL PHONE RINGS]
Oh, Miss Blair.
What are we going to do?
-Call police?
BLAIR: No.
-We're going to throw a party.
-I go to Masa. See if they will cater.
Pardon me.
I was packing and talking to Blair
about her classes, and then it hit me.
I wasn't excited about any of it.
I don't know what I wanna do yet.
And going off to a new place
to figure that out? I--
I don't know, I'm just--
I'm not ready for that.
Look, sis, for people like us,
a college degree is just an accessory.
Like a Malawi baby or a poodle.
An accessory my mother
really wants me to have.
You wanna hide out at the Bass cave
till you figure it out.
Yeah, if that's okay with you. Nobody
knows about this, not even Blair.
Blair would be more upset
than my mother.
I couldn't help but notice you and Carter
Baizen at the Vanderbilt polo party.
-This doesn't have to do with him?
-No, absolutely not.
-I haven't seen him since then.
-Good.
One favor. I'm having a meeting here
so if you can clear out for a few hours.
I don't mind if your dealer comes by.
Jesse is in St. Barts this week.
This is something more legitimate.
You know the old art-deco bank
on 72nd between Madison and Park?
The one that went under last month.
I wanna make it into a speakeasy.
In the front, an elegant restaurant.
But down in the vault, an after-hours
locale devoted to indecency...
...disreputable behavior
and all manner of debauchery.
A kind of homage
to the last time the market crashed.
The harder the times, the harder
people wanna party and forget about it.
Chuck, this is really a great idea.
I can't believe Blair
hasn't told me about this yet.
She doesn't know. Nobody does.
I just wanted to wait
till I was sure it was going through.
You know, my father turned
his first profit by the time he was 22.
I hope to do it by the time I'm 21.
Let me guess. Women in Literature,
Professor Schweik?
I'm a sucker for stories
about scorned women.
I got the same. I think the universe
is trying to tell us something.
I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
I should've called you.
No, it's okay. I wouldn't
have wanted to call me either...
...after the way I came down
on you at the party.
Um....
-So Scott.
-Yeah. He's so great.
He really wants to get to know you.
My God, I have so much to tell you.
-Guess who lives in my dorm.
GEORGINA: Hey, guys.
Ohh! h*, h*. Oh.
Sorry to interrupt.
I just saw you and I thought--
So I really just wanna apologize
for everything that happened in the past.
I got my meds straightened out and
I'm really in a much better place now.
So I come to NYU hoping for a fresh
start and who do I get as my roommate?
-Blair Waldorf.
-What?
We have so much to catch up on.
I mean, I wish I had
some other friends here, you know?
You guys are really lucky
to have each other.
Anyway, I should go.
Okay, this is probably too much...
...but would you guys
wanna have a coffee with me?
Uh.... Look, Georgina, I appreciate
that you want a clean slate...
...but I think it would kind of
be too much. I'm sorry.
No, of course.
I mean, I totally understand.
I'd feel the same way.
I'll see you around.
-Maybe we were a little bit too harsh.
-What? It's Georgina.
-You're Dan.
-You're Vanessa. This is a fun game.
Sorry. I thought you were
more forgiving than that.
Are you trying to make me
the bad guy here?
No, it's just, we want a fresh start
and so does she.
Okay, I know you're new
to the whole school thing...
...but you don't want Georgina
as your friend.
I mean, she's gonna
scare everyone away.
Georgina. Hey.
NATE: What's gonna happen
when we start classes?
That's why we have
my family's apartment.
And plus, you know
all this sneaking around?
Making sure the doorman
doesn't see.
Not answering the phone
when my mother calls.
I mean, you know it adds
a layer of hotness.
What are you saying? That
our hotness is purely circumstantial?
And that if we were out in the real
world, we'd like each other less?
Mm-hm.
You know
that if we really started dating...
...after a few months, you'd realize
that you hate the way that I laugh...
...I couldn't stand the way
that you chew and we'd break up.
That's a very romantic story.
No, but it doesn't have to be like that.
Care to make a bet?
I got an idea.
I will hole up with you for 24 hours...
...we fast-forward
through the entire relationship.
Leave the seat up,
sing Timberlake in the shower.
Watch shows you like,
not ones you're supposed to.
What do you say?
You, me, this apartment.
Let's get sick of each other.
Okay.
CHUCK: As you can see,
the restaurant would be elegant.
Seasonal menu, extensive wine list.
Now, the space is big, but I want it
to have a more intimate feel.
And how would you be using
the vault space?
It's perfect for storage.
I have to be honest.
Given your reputation, when you made
your bid, the board was very concerned.
I completely understand.
The neighbors don't want some raucous
club coming in and disrupting the quiet.
And believe me, I wouldn't wanna
bring that element to the area.
SERENA:
I'll be right down.
[SPEAKS IN ITALIAN]
Sorry. I'm not here. My heel broke.
Stepsister. I apologize.
[CELL PHONE RINGS]
My lawyer. Excuse me.
[MOUTHS]
Get out.
Sorry for interrupting your meeting.
Not at all. We were finishing up,
anyway.
Are you leasing Chuck
the bank space?
-Mm-hm. He has a real vision.
-I know.
Turning the vault into a club?
It's genius.
Serena.
FANK:
Excuse me?
Thank you.
Cool party. I'm Amalia.
I'm glad people understand the concept
of fashionably late. This is ridiculous.
I think everybody's down the hall
watching a movie or something.
What?
Please, ease up on the toro.
He has to answer to a board, Serena.
And board members
tend not to approve of clubs...
...with coat-check girls
who give happy endings.
It was an honest mistake.
When he was talking about your--
Look, why do you think I asked you
to go out tonight?
Because I knew something like this
would happen.
Fine. Then I'll go.
Train wreck.
MAN 1: All right.
MAN 2: Yeah.
[CHATTERING]
Oh! Hey, Blair.
Oh, my God, we just finished watching
Vanessa's documentary...
...about this community garden
in her neighborhood.
-It was amazing.
-No, it wasn't.
Yes, it was. I mean, Vanessa, tears.
Actual tears.
When that g*ng member
picked up his carrot--
Okay, screening is over.
The c*ck party has officially begun
in the common room. Sake-tinis.
And is that my invitation
being used as a coaster?
Thanks so much, Blair.
But we actually just scarfed, like, four
pizzas. Vanessa's about to show us...
-...her bootleg Michel Gondry videos.
-Georgina, please.
Nobody wants greasy pizza
and Vanessa's home movies...
...when there's a sushi-and-sake party
in the other room.
Did I mention wasabi facials?
-Okay, then.
-And shut the door.
GOSSIP GIRL: Spotted:
Blair Waldorf going from VIP to VD.
Poor Blair.
How are you gonna cure this one?
Morning.
Hey. Thanks for letting me
crash here last night.
Harboring an Ivy League fugitive?
I'm your man. I made you breakfast.
I have to go, but remember
we don't have servants here.
So if you see anybody else in the loft,
call the police. It's not the chef.
Good to know.
-So did classes start already?
-No, just orientation stuff.
But I did join a literary group.
More people talked to me in one day
than my entire four years at St. Jude's.
I'm not surprised. I can totally see
why people would love you there.
About Brown.... You should
think about talking to my dad.
He might ramble a lot,
might nervously strum his guitar...
...but when it comes to fatherly advice,
he's pretty much the best there is.
GEORGINA: Do you want one?
Thanks. Come to the party.
-Come to the party.
GIRL 1: Oh, great.
GEORGINA:
Thanks.
-It's gonna be really fun. Fantastic.
GIRL 1: We'll be there.
Oh.
So if you're not trying to sabotage me,
then what is this?
You ruin my sushi party
and now you're making your move.
-This paranoia has got to stop, Blair.
-I'm not paranoid, I'm right.
Why form an alliance with Vanessa,
the person I hate more than you?
It's not an alliance, it's a friendship.
Unlike you, Vanessa's cool.
People like her. More than the weird girl
who threw the fish party.
Sushi. There was toro.
Face it, Blair. Once upon a time
in a far-off land, you were a queen.
Here you're just a loser
who will never fit in.
So you won't be needing that.
Hey, guys, do you wanna come
to my party? You can have one too.
-You're really pretty.
GIRL 2: Thank you.
Rufus?
Hello?
-What are you doing here?
-Rufus and I were just catching up.
But I have to prepare for a meeting
tonight. Thank you for the waffles.
Look, I don't know what kind of
twisted spin Chuck put on things...
...but I actually wanted to
talk to you about this.
Rufus, I'm having doubts
about going to Brown.
Well, I'm sorry,
but to lie about leaving for college?
Between the show you put on
for the paparazzi...
...and the craziness
at the party last week and this...
-...I don't know what's going on.
-I'm sorry I lied.
-I didn't wanna upset Mom.
-At least we agree about that.
You can repack your things
and go to Brown today.
I'll have a car here within an hour.
There's no reason Lily has to know.
Or what, you'll tell on me?
Wow, I feel really emotionally supported
in making this life-changing decision.
It's not a decision, it's a mistake...
...which is why I'm trying to
get you not to make it.
By threatening me.
Do you know you're more afraid
of my mother than I am?
You know what, Rufus?
Go ahead, call her.
You can let her know
I'm not going to Brown.
Thanks for the talk.
[CELL PHONE RINGS]
-What do you want?
-Hey.
I was wondering
if you wanna go out tonight.
-I thought you were at Brown.
-No, I'm not.
In fact, after I hang up with you,
I will be withdrawing my admission.
There's nobody
I'd rather celebrate with.
So are you in or out?
See you tonight.
DAN: No, I learned everything I know
about women...
...from Judy Blume's Forever.
Can I talk to you?
Yeah. Yeah, what's up?
I was wondering...
...do you have a date
to Georgina's party?
GOSSIP GIRL:
Forget the Four Horsemen.
The real evidence our world
is coming to an end?
Blair Waldorf needing Dan Humphrey
to rescue her from social extinction.
MAN 1: You got it?
MAN 2: Yup.
You okay?
I feel like I got off on the wrong foot
here and I wanna start again...
...so thanks for bringing me,
Humphrey.
Oh. Yeah. I would like to think
that if I needed it...
...somebody would do the same for me.
Though, we know it wouldn't be you.
Oh. No headbands in college. Okay?
[POP MUSIC PLAYING
& CROWD CHATTERING]
-Katie.
-Hey, guys.
-Blair. You.... You remember Katie.
-Yeah. Cute necklace.
Thank you. I love your....
How about I get us all drinks,
and you two talk?
Just not about high school. Please.
MAN:
What's up, Dan?
So was everyone at your school
totally jealous of Dan...
...for being such a great writer?
Dan's a writer?
Oh. Hey, Dan.
Hey. Listen, I'm sorry about yesterday.
I was out of line.
Please, don't even worry about it.
I mean, you have every right to be upset.
-I'm just really glad you're here.
-Thanks.
Okay. So am I really drunk or
did I just see you walk in with Blair?
GIRL:
Hey, there.
You wanted me to give you a chance.
Don't you think you should
give one to Blair?
She's not looking for a second chance,
she's looking for a way in.
People like you here, Dan,
and Blair sees that.
I've been the person
not welcome at parties...
...and if I'm now on the other side...
...I'm not gonna treat people
the way I was treated.
-Even if it's Blair.
-I'm just trying to look out for you.
Trust me, you're being used.
Have fun.
Gross. With your mother's
L.L. Bean catalog?
A cargo-short fetish definitely goes
in the minus column.
What? I was 12 years old.
Speaking of pants,
pass yours over here.
-What do you need my pants for?
-I wanna see what's in them.
-Show me your secrets.
-Have a look. It's just normal stuff.
Normal stuff, huh? All right.
See?
Keys, cell phone, yeah.
A boarding pass...
...from London.
Don't tell me you've been wearing
these pants since we met.
No, I--
Look, if you must know, I kept it.
And he has a sentimental streak.
I thought your theory was that if we
got to know each other, we'd break up.
Maybe I'm revising my theory.
To you. Brown's loss is my gain.
Thank you. Heh, heh, heh.
You know, when you called,
I tried not to answer.
Great. Chuck Bass.
Let's get out of here.
No. Come on. Since when
do you run away from Chuck Bass?
It looks like he's having
a business meeting. This could be fun.
-No way.
-Serena. Carter. This isn't a good time.
Well, then, let's make it one.
What's wrong?
Aren't you happy to see us?
Carter and I were just
sharing Chuck Bass stories.
We had to break them into categories.
What were we up to?
-International affairs?
-There was the time when Chuck...
...and the Italian ambassador's son were
asked to leave an Amsterdam brothel.
-That's an accomplishment.
-Neither of us spoke any Dutch.
[SERENA CHUCKLES]
Oh, my gosh, is this--?
Is this a business meeting?
I'm sorry if you sense any tension.
These two don't like each other much.
They share the same taste in women.
Sometimes they share the actual women.
-That's enough.
CARTER: What's this meeting about?
-Still trying to fill your daddy's shoes?
SERENA: Yeah, Chuck, come on.
-Tell him your idea.
-I'm opening a restaurant.
Yeah, that's what he's telling people,
but downstairs in the vault...
...he's creating a club.
What did you say?
You wanted to redefine decadence?
You wanted to ruin my deal...
...so you came here and brought
Carter Baizen as your wingman.
I told Rufus about Brown...
...because I was actually concerned
for you.
I'm sorry to have wasted your time.
Are you insane?
Battlestar kicks TNG's a*s.
What other show in history
has been asked to speak at the UN?
An organization that condemns
terrorism while secretly funding it...
...hosts a panel for a show
that glorifies t*rrorists. Dude.
-I can't even look at you right now.
-Don't look.
What do you think?
-Trust me, you don't wanna know.
-I do. I do wanna know.
Oh, thank God.
Man, I'm really glad you decided
to come to the party.
Thanks, man, that's....
Vanessa cares about you a lot and I
know that she was hoping you'd come.
-You know that.
-Right. Yeah, yeah. I know that.
VANESSA: There he is.
-Oh, speak of the devil. Hey.
To.... To fresh starts.
-I'm happy you're here, Humphrey.
-Me too.
So, Scott, you are in big trouble.
I cannot believe you told Vanessa...
...to take Professor Rifkin
for Art in the World.
-Why? I mean, I liked him.
-Dude, he's totally old school.
Not to mention just plain old.
I mean, his lecture notes
are literally turning yellow with age.
Please, do tell, what other professors
are you recommending?
Let's hear it, because
Katie's gonna have to weigh in.
I'm at a party.
I don't feel like taking a test now.
Excuse me, everyone! Can you please--?
Stop with that noise. Hi, everyone.
What the hell?
Well, most of you don't know me.
My name is Blair Waldorf.
But a lot of you know my roommate
who threw this amazing party, Georgina.
[CHEERING]
Yeah, I know. Georgina rocks, right?
It's funny, because I never knew
that a Jesus freak...
...could throw such a good party,
but I guess I was wrong.
So everyone raise a glass
or a plastic cup of foam...
...to the coolest Christian I know,
Georgina Sparks.
[SINGING] What do you know?
What do you know?
What do you know about Jesus?
What do you know?
What do you know?
What do you know about the Lord?
What do you know?
What do you know about Jesus
And his love?
Oh, my God. This is a conversion party.
I can't believe it.
Georgina threw this party...
...and invited all her friends here
to convert the vulnerable freshmen.
GOSSIP GIRL: Seems that Blair Waldorf
has finally found Jesus...
...and invited him
to crash Georgina's party.
WAITER: Thank you, sir.
-Carter, wait.
That's the reason you wanted me
to go out with you.
You knew I'd help you
screw over Chuck.
Chuck had screwed me over.
At least I thought he had.
I wanted to get him back.
Listen to you. You're acting out
because Daddy doesn't love you?
Is that why you skipped out on Brown?
-Please.
-No.
I told you how I felt
and you blew me off...
...until you needed someone to do your
work. It's time to find a new bad habit...
...because it's not gonna be me
anymore.
-VIP.
GIRL: Yeah, I know.
VIP room at the Monkey Bar.
Monkey Bar.
-Can't wait.
-Limo's downstairs.
We were worried. We missed you.
I can't tell you how my heart filled with
joy when we got your call inviting us...
-...to share his glory with your friends.
-I didn't invite you here.
We thought our lamb
had been lost for good.
-I am lost.
BLAIR: I'm taking over the VIP room.
Hope I see you there. Monkey Bar.
-Limo's downstairs.
-Blair, what are you doing?
Georgina was turning everyone
against me. You were just a casualty.
Don't worry,
your loyalty's been rewarded.
Your name's on the list. Yours isn't.
Georgina wasn't turning people against
you, Blair. You tried to bribe people...
...with sushi parties and gift bags,
and nobody liked it.
I don't need these losers to like me
in order to follow me.
Fear works better, anyway.
Dan, you've experienced social Siberia.
If you wanna try something new,
I'll see you at Monkey Bar.
I didn't know there was
a cool crowd at college.
You and I were the only ones
dumb enough to believe that.
Hey. So some of us are wondering
if you're gonna go to Monkey Bar.
You know, just because someone
has to be on top...
...doesn't mean it has to be Blair.
When you get downstairs,
you'll find limos waiting to take you.
And no sticking your head
out the sunroof.
This isn't East Ridge High School
prom.
-Bye.
DAN: Hello, hey. Excuse me.
Can I get everybody's attention, please?
Hey, hi. Hello. I'm Dan.
I just wanna let everybody know here
that Blair Waldorf...
...over there invited some people
from Georgina's past...
...just so she could embarrass her.
But we're also in college, and college
is a place where you're not judged...
...about what you believe or friends.
You're here to make new friends.
All right, so last time I checked--
I mean....
I think this party was pretty fun, right?
Yeah, okay.
So who wants to leave with Blair?
All right, and who wants to stay here
and drink cheap beer with me?
It's a no-brainer. Here you go.
Thank you.
You didn't have to do that.
Yeah, I did.
Let's get a beer.
GOSSIP GIRL: Uh-oh, B, looks like
your new flock was just led astray...
...and by Dan Humphrey no less.
I guess they know a false prophet
when they see one.
Hi.
-Mind if I join you?
-It's your home.
Dan told you I was here?
I was...
...glad you felt like
you could come here.
That you felt like
this was a safe place.
I'm really sorry, Rufus. I never meant
for it to get this messed up.
-None of it was your fault.
-Well, I didn't help matters.
I shouldn't have blown up at you
the way that I did.
So talk to me.
Well....
I called Brown and deferred for a year.
-Okay.
-May have been for the wrong reasons...
...at the time, I think.
Well, no, I know
that it was the right decision.
I would've been going
because my mom wanted me to go.
While that's a good reason,
that's not good enough.
You know, I did the same thing.
Well, it was Rutgers, not Brown.
But I got in and I realized that
if I didn't pursue music, I'd never do it.
I wish I had that same sense
of purpose...
...but I hope that if I take this time
that I'll find it.
Gosh, how am I gonna tell my mom?
Maybe I could help you figure that out.
I know I'm not the first guy
that your mom's brought into your life...
...but if you and Eric will let me...
...I'd really like to be more to you
than....
Than just Lily's most recent husband.
Let me help you with this.
Wow, I....
I would really appreciate that, Rufus.
I'm sorry, Mom. It wasn't my intention
to embarrass you or Daddy.
I wouldn't be doing this
if I didn't feel the way I do.
I really, really like him, and--
Mom, please don't be like that.
Mom?
I guess we didn't fool the doorman.
So you told your mom the truth?
I didn't wanna risk everything
with my family...
...for some fling
that wasn't gonna last.
But?
Well, if your family can accept us
together, maybe one day mine will too.
And if not?
That's a risk that I'm willing to take.
There's a reason we never
went downtown. It's awful.
The minute you cross Fourteenth Street,
people forget there's a class system.
B, you will find your place.
Just give it time.
No, I found my place,
and it's at the bottom.
It's a point of pride now
that I see who's on top.
Anyway, it's all turned out
for the best.
If I hadn't been distracted,
I would've forced you to go to Brown.
That's sweet,
but, no, you wouldn't have.
I am sorry I pulled a disappearing act
on you.
I'm sure you'll find a way
to make it up to me...
...in the handbag department
at Bendels.
Now, normally I'd be more worried
about Brown...
...but you actually seem a lot better
than you have in a while.
I really am.
It was so much easier when it was just
about where we sat on the Met steps.
Yeah, but we've....
We've been here, done this.
But I was so good at it.
Well, then, it's time for a new challenge
for both of us.
I'm glad you're not going to Brown.
I need you here.
Same.
-Bye.
-Bye, you.
I'm sorry I'm late,
but I have a good excuse.
-What is this?
-A review...
...of all the professors I had this
summer. Look, I even gave them grades.
Oh. This is amazing.
Sorry for that weird moment
with Katie last night.
I think I got a little overwhelmed
from meeting all your friends.
That's okay. That was kind of
the least weird part of the whole night.
When Dan got on the mic and
he convinced everyone to stay...
...that was insane.
-Is he usually like that?
-No.
Dan is more of
a corner-of-the party guy.
Should I call him? See if he'll join us?
Call him later. I just wanna be
with you right now.
-What do you want?
-There's a reason I come back to you...
...and it's not because
you're my bad habit.
What, then?
You're the one who understood
why I needed to find my father.
You were there for me during all of that,
and I trust you.
-Anyone would've done the same thing.
-No, they wouldn't have.
And I don't want anyone else.
I want you.
You were right about the dorms.
The lighting is awful.
Are you okay?
I am now.
[CELL PHONE RINGING]
[GROANS]
-Hello?
-Hey.
You wanna meet me and Scott
so we can download about last night?
No, you know what? I'm still a little
wrecked, so I'll call you later.
Okay. Bye.
GOSSIP GIRL:
Apparently higher education...
...doesn't make for smarter decisions.
So take out your notebooks
and sharpen your pencils, kids.
Gossip Girl's going to college
and this class has a lot to learn.
WOMAN:
Where has she been?
GOSSIP GIRL:
And who am I?
That's one secret I'll never tell.
You know you love me. XOXO...
...Gossip Girl.
GOSSIP GIRL: Every fall,
confident high school seniors...
...transform into nervous
college freshmen.
They leave their parents' homes for
the hallowed halls of higher education.
And like any new venture...
...starting college holds the promise
of limitless opportunity.
The opportunity
to conquer a new territory.
Or to try and be a little less lonely.
But just because
the opportunity presents itself...
[CELL PHONE BEEPS]
...doesn't mean everybody
is ready to take it.
You're so sweet to see me off.
I can't believe NYU orientation week
is finally here.
I have to object to you living
in the dorms. Florescent lighting...
...communal showers,
public school girls?
There's a place for that and it belongs
in the back of a video store.
It's not for long.
I can't rule the NYU masses
from the Upper East Side.
I need time in the dorm
to establish myself as queen.
It's not Constance, Blair.
The only queens at NYU are the ones
with tickets to see Liza at Carnegie Hall.
Chuck, I trust that when you say "never
drink absinthe with Daniel Baldwin"...
...you know
what you're talking about.
But when I say the first week of college
means scared, vulnerable freshmen...
...needing someone to guide them,
I know what I'm talking about.
And I'm very excited for you.
You haven't called Vanessa?
-She's gotta call me.
-You could get over it.
After all these years,
you guys'll be at the same school.
It's probably not the best idea
to avoid my only friend at NYU.
I don't think you're gonna have
any trouble making friends there.
The World of Greenwich Village
intelligentsia...
...is Dan Humphrey's natural habitat.
You're so lucky.
NYU is exactly the right place for you.
Like Brown is for you?
-Serena?
-Um....
Sorry. Yeah, you know what, I should
finish packing. But good luck, Dan.
-Hey, I'm sorry, are you Dan Humphrey?
-Uh, yeah.
The Dan Humphrey who was published
in the issue of The New Yorker?
Uh, yeah.
[CHUCKLES]
Large coffee, please. I'm Katie.
And I'm not usually
an eavesdropping stalker.
It's just that I read your piece.
It was amazing.
What? Really? Wow, that's--
Thank you.
Yeah, well, at first I hated you
because I also submitted.
But then I read it and I was like:
"Okay, fine. I accept defeat
at your hands, Dan Humphrey."
Anyway, I have a writers' group.
We meet every week.
We're meeting here at noon tomorrow.
You should come.
[DOOR KNOCKS]
-Car's downstairs. You ready?
-As I'll ever be.
Today's a big day.
You and Dan both off to college.
Yeah, no, I know. I should get going.
Your mom's so proud of you.
So am I.
[INAUDIBLE DIALOGUE]
-Hey.
-Scott, you remember Dan. Dan, Scott.
Yeah, it's good to finally
officially meet you.
You dating now?
I heard you were friends.
-You actually have to call to find out.
-Okay, I didn't realize we were speaking.
-Oh, God.
VANESSA: Of course she's in a limo.
BLAIR:
Eww.
Let's make it clear from the start:
We don't know each other here.
-Works for me.
-Me too.
[DOOR KNOCKS]
Well, hello, sis.
I assume you need a few ounces
of study aid for Brown.
No. I need a place to stay.
I'm not going to Brown.
BLAIR: We may all be freshmen
and new to NYU and the dorms...
...but that doesn't mean
we embarrass ourselves.
I can tell that none of you
are from New York City.
GIRL: Actually, I'm from--
-Riverdale doesn't count.
I won't be holding the sad truths
of your hometowns against you.
In fact, I want to help you.
For example:
Who can tell me which is the only club
to be seen at on a Saturday night?
-I read Marquee.
BLAIR: Wrong.
You should never be seen at a club
on Saturday night.
It's strictly bridge and tunnel
on the weekends.
Dorota and I
have put together gift bags...
...filled with essentials for everyone.
I think you don't need week
to run school, you do it in one day.
I know. This is going even better
than I had hoped.
The best part is
I seem to have a single.
Sorry I'm late.
Blair? Blair Waldorf? Oh, my gosh.
[GIGGLES]
Oh, my gosh. I can't believe it.
We're roommates.
GOSSIP GIRL: Rah, rah, sis boom bah,
Georgina's pulled a coup d'état.
Welcome to college, B.
This is gonna be a blast.
Following me to NYU?
Becoming my roommate?
I'm gonna have Dorota
file a restraining order.
I mean, you're overreacting.
The roommate thing is a coincidence.
My parents said it was
either Bible camp or college. So...
-...go Bobcats!
-So you're not in love with Jesus?
I still hold him in my heart. Jesus
and I have redefined our relationship.
He dumped you.
He found you were Satan.
This could actually be a good thing,
Blair.
Look. Manolos.
Size seven just like you.
-Let me know if you wanna borrow.
-I'll win, you know.
I will rule here.
You can't stand in my way.
-Are we still playing this game?
BLAIR: Oh, please. Like you're not.
GEORGINA:
I'm not. I'm here for a fresh start.
VANESSA:
Oh, no.
Vanessa? You're in our dorm too?
Yay.
Your dorm? Yeah,
my room's just down the hall, so....
That's awesome.
Oh! Isn't this so pretty?
I'm gonna hang it up.
[CELL PHONE RINGS]
Oh, Miss Blair.
What are we going to do?
-Call police?
BLAIR: No.
-We're going to throw a party.
-I go to Masa. See if they will cater.
Pardon me.
I was packing and talking to Blair
about her classes, and then it hit me.
I wasn't excited about any of it.
I don't know what I wanna do yet.
And going off to a new place
to figure that out? I--
I don't know, I'm just--
I'm not ready for that.
Look, sis, for people like us,
a college degree is just an accessory.
Like a Malawi baby or a poodle.
An accessory my mother
really wants me to have.
You wanna hide out at the Bass cave
till you figure it out.
Yeah, if that's okay with you. Nobody
knows about this, not even Blair.
Blair would be more upset
than my mother.
I couldn't help but notice you and Carter
Baizen at the Vanderbilt polo party.
-This doesn't have to do with him?
-No, absolutely not.
-I haven't seen him since then.
-Good.
One favor. I'm having a meeting here
so if you can clear out for a few hours.
I don't mind if your dealer comes by.
Jesse is in St. Barts this week.
This is something more legitimate.
You know the old art-deco bank
on 72nd between Madison and Park?
The one that went under last month.
I wanna make it into a speakeasy.
In the front, an elegant restaurant.
But down in the vault, an after-hours
locale devoted to indecency...
...disreputable behavior
and all manner of debauchery.
A kind of homage
to the last time the market crashed.
The harder the times, the harder
people wanna party and forget about it.
Chuck, this is really a great idea.
I can't believe Blair
hasn't told me about this yet.
She doesn't know. Nobody does.
I just wanted to wait
till I was sure it was going through.
You know, my father turned
his first profit by the time he was 22.
I hope to do it by the time I'm 21.
Let me guess. Women in Literature,
Professor Schweik?
I'm a sucker for stories
about scorned women.
I got the same. I think the universe
is trying to tell us something.
I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
I should've called you.
No, it's okay. I wouldn't
have wanted to call me either...
...after the way I came down
on you at the party.
Um....
-So Scott.
-Yeah. He's so great.
He really wants to get to know you.
My God, I have so much to tell you.
-Guess who lives in my dorm.
GEORGINA: Hey, guys.
Ohh! h*, h*. Oh.
Sorry to interrupt.
I just saw you and I thought--
So I really just wanna apologize
for everything that happened in the past.
I got my meds straightened out and
I'm really in a much better place now.
So I come to NYU hoping for a fresh
start and who do I get as my roommate?
-Blair Waldorf.
-What?
We have so much to catch up on.
I mean, I wish I had
some other friends here, you know?
You guys are really lucky
to have each other.
Anyway, I should go.
Okay, this is probably too much...
...but would you guys
wanna have a coffee with me?
Uh.... Look, Georgina, I appreciate
that you want a clean slate...
...but I think it would kind of
be too much. I'm sorry.
No, of course.
I mean, I totally understand.
I'd feel the same way.
I'll see you around.
-Maybe we were a little bit too harsh.
-What? It's Georgina.
-You're Dan.
-You're Vanessa. This is a fun game.
Sorry. I thought you were
more forgiving than that.
Are you trying to make me
the bad guy here?
No, it's just, we want a fresh start
and so does she.
Okay, I know you're new
to the whole school thing...
...but you don't want Georgina
as your friend.
I mean, she's gonna
scare everyone away.
Georgina. Hey.
NATE: What's gonna happen
when we start classes?
That's why we have
my family's apartment.
And plus, you know
all this sneaking around?
Making sure the doorman
doesn't see.
Not answering the phone
when my mother calls.
I mean, you know it adds
a layer of hotness.
What are you saying? That
our hotness is purely circumstantial?
And that if we were out in the real
world, we'd like each other less?
Mm-hm.
You know
that if we really started dating...
...after a few months, you'd realize
that you hate the way that I laugh...
...I couldn't stand the way
that you chew and we'd break up.
That's a very romantic story.
No, but it doesn't have to be like that.
Care to make a bet?
I got an idea.
I will hole up with you for 24 hours...
...we fast-forward
through the entire relationship.
Leave the seat up,
sing Timberlake in the shower.
Watch shows you like,
not ones you're supposed to.
What do you say?
You, me, this apartment.
Let's get sick of each other.
Okay.
CHUCK: As you can see,
the restaurant would be elegant.
Seasonal menu, extensive wine list.
Now, the space is big, but I want it
to have a more intimate feel.
And how would you be using
the vault space?
It's perfect for storage.
I have to be honest.
Given your reputation, when you made
your bid, the board was very concerned.
I completely understand.
The neighbors don't want some raucous
club coming in and disrupting the quiet.
And believe me, I wouldn't wanna
bring that element to the area.
SERENA:
I'll be right down.
[SPEAKS IN ITALIAN]
Sorry. I'm not here. My heel broke.
Stepsister. I apologize.
[CELL PHONE RINGS]
My lawyer. Excuse me.
[MOUTHS]
Get out.
Sorry for interrupting your meeting.
Not at all. We were finishing up,
anyway.
Are you leasing Chuck
the bank space?
-Mm-hm. He has a real vision.
-I know.
Turning the vault into a club?
It's genius.
Serena.
FANK:
Excuse me?
Thank you.
Cool party. I'm Amalia.
I'm glad people understand the concept
of fashionably late. This is ridiculous.
I think everybody's down the hall
watching a movie or something.
What?
Please, ease up on the toro.
He has to answer to a board, Serena.
And board members
tend not to approve of clubs...
...with coat-check girls
who give happy endings.
It was an honest mistake.
When he was talking about your--
Look, why do you think I asked you
to go out tonight?
Because I knew something like this
would happen.
Fine. Then I'll go.
Train wreck.
MAN 1: All right.
MAN 2: Yeah.
[CHATTERING]
Oh! Hey, Blair.
Oh, my God, we just finished watching
Vanessa's documentary...
...about this community garden
in her neighborhood.
-It was amazing.
-No, it wasn't.
Yes, it was. I mean, Vanessa, tears.
Actual tears.
When that g*ng member
picked up his carrot--
Okay, screening is over.
The c*ck party has officially begun
in the common room. Sake-tinis.
And is that my invitation
being used as a coaster?
Thanks so much, Blair.
But we actually just scarfed, like, four
pizzas. Vanessa's about to show us...
-...her bootleg Michel Gondry videos.
-Georgina, please.
Nobody wants greasy pizza
and Vanessa's home movies...
...when there's a sushi-and-sake party
in the other room.
Did I mention wasabi facials?
-Okay, then.
-And shut the door.
GOSSIP GIRL: Spotted:
Blair Waldorf going from VIP to VD.
Poor Blair.
How are you gonna cure this one?
Morning.
Hey. Thanks for letting me
crash here last night.
Harboring an Ivy League fugitive?
I'm your man. I made you breakfast.
I have to go, but remember
we don't have servants here.
So if you see anybody else in the loft,
call the police. It's not the chef.
Good to know.
-So did classes start already?
-No, just orientation stuff.
But I did join a literary group.
More people talked to me in one day
than my entire four years at St. Jude's.
I'm not surprised. I can totally see
why people would love you there.
About Brown.... You should
think about talking to my dad.
He might ramble a lot,
might nervously strum his guitar...
...but when it comes to fatherly advice,
he's pretty much the best there is.
GEORGINA: Do you want one?
Thanks. Come to the party.
-Come to the party.
GIRL 1: Oh, great.
GEORGINA:
Thanks.
-It's gonna be really fun. Fantastic.
GIRL 1: We'll be there.
Oh.
So if you're not trying to sabotage me,
then what is this?
You ruin my sushi party
and now you're making your move.
-This paranoia has got to stop, Blair.
-I'm not paranoid, I'm right.
Why form an alliance with Vanessa,
the person I hate more than you?
It's not an alliance, it's a friendship.
Unlike you, Vanessa's cool.
People like her. More than the weird girl
who threw the fish party.
Sushi. There was toro.
Face it, Blair. Once upon a time
in a far-off land, you were a queen.
Here you're just a loser
who will never fit in.
So you won't be needing that.
Hey, guys, do you wanna come
to my party? You can have one too.
-You're really pretty.
GIRL 2: Thank you.
Rufus?
Hello?
-What are you doing here?
-Rufus and I were just catching up.
But I have to prepare for a meeting
tonight. Thank you for the waffles.
Look, I don't know what kind of
twisted spin Chuck put on things...
...but I actually wanted to
talk to you about this.
Rufus, I'm having doubts
about going to Brown.
Well, I'm sorry,
but to lie about leaving for college?
Between the show you put on
for the paparazzi...
...and the craziness
at the party last week and this...
-...I don't know what's going on.
-I'm sorry I lied.
-I didn't wanna upset Mom.
-At least we agree about that.
You can repack your things
and go to Brown today.
I'll have a car here within an hour.
There's no reason Lily has to know.
Or what, you'll tell on me?
Wow, I feel really emotionally supported
in making this life-changing decision.
It's not a decision, it's a mistake...
...which is why I'm trying to
get you not to make it.
By threatening me.
Do you know you're more afraid
of my mother than I am?
You know what, Rufus?
Go ahead, call her.
You can let her know
I'm not going to Brown.
Thanks for the talk.
[CELL PHONE RINGS]
-What do you want?
-Hey.
I was wondering
if you wanna go out tonight.
-I thought you were at Brown.
-No, I'm not.
In fact, after I hang up with you,
I will be withdrawing my admission.
There's nobody
I'd rather celebrate with.
So are you in or out?
See you tonight.
DAN: No, I learned everything I know
about women...
...from Judy Blume's Forever.
Can I talk to you?
Yeah. Yeah, what's up?
I was wondering...
...do you have a date
to Georgina's party?
GOSSIP GIRL:
Forget the Four Horsemen.
The real evidence our world
is coming to an end?
Blair Waldorf needing Dan Humphrey
to rescue her from social extinction.
MAN 1: You got it?
MAN 2: Yup.
You okay?
I feel like I got off on the wrong foot
here and I wanna start again...
...so thanks for bringing me,
Humphrey.
Oh. Yeah. I would like to think
that if I needed it...
...somebody would do the same for me.
Though, we know it wouldn't be you.
Oh. No headbands in college. Okay?
[POP MUSIC PLAYING
& CROWD CHATTERING]
-Katie.
-Hey, guys.
-Blair. You.... You remember Katie.
-Yeah. Cute necklace.
Thank you. I love your....
How about I get us all drinks,
and you two talk?
Just not about high school. Please.
MAN:
What's up, Dan?
So was everyone at your school
totally jealous of Dan...
...for being such a great writer?
Dan's a writer?
Oh. Hey, Dan.
Hey. Listen, I'm sorry about yesterday.
I was out of line.
Please, don't even worry about it.
I mean, you have every right to be upset.
-I'm just really glad you're here.
-Thanks.
Okay. So am I really drunk or
did I just see you walk in with Blair?
GIRL:
Hey, there.
You wanted me to give you a chance.
Don't you think you should
give one to Blair?
She's not looking for a second chance,
she's looking for a way in.
People like you here, Dan,
and Blair sees that.
I've been the person
not welcome at parties...
...and if I'm now on the other side...
...I'm not gonna treat people
the way I was treated.
-Even if it's Blair.
-I'm just trying to look out for you.
Trust me, you're being used.
Have fun.
Gross. With your mother's
L.L. Bean catalog?
A cargo-short fetish definitely goes
in the minus column.
What? I was 12 years old.
Speaking of pants,
pass yours over here.
-What do you need my pants for?
-I wanna see what's in them.
-Show me your secrets.
-Have a look. It's just normal stuff.
Normal stuff, huh? All right.
See?
Keys, cell phone, yeah.
A boarding pass...
...from London.
Don't tell me you've been wearing
these pants since we met.
No, I--
Look, if you must know, I kept it.
And he has a sentimental streak.
I thought your theory was that if we
got to know each other, we'd break up.
Maybe I'm revising my theory.
To you. Brown's loss is my gain.
Thank you. Heh, heh, heh.
You know, when you called,
I tried not to answer.
Great. Chuck Bass.
Let's get out of here.
No. Come on. Since when
do you run away from Chuck Bass?
It looks like he's having
a business meeting. This could be fun.
-No way.
-Serena. Carter. This isn't a good time.
Well, then, let's make it one.
What's wrong?
Aren't you happy to see us?
Carter and I were just
sharing Chuck Bass stories.
We had to break them into categories.
What were we up to?
-International affairs?
-There was the time when Chuck...
...and the Italian ambassador's son were
asked to leave an Amsterdam brothel.
-That's an accomplishment.
-Neither of us spoke any Dutch.
[SERENA CHUCKLES]
Oh, my gosh, is this--?
Is this a business meeting?
I'm sorry if you sense any tension.
These two don't like each other much.
They share the same taste in women.
Sometimes they share the actual women.
-That's enough.
CARTER: What's this meeting about?
-Still trying to fill your daddy's shoes?
SERENA: Yeah, Chuck, come on.
-Tell him your idea.
-I'm opening a restaurant.
Yeah, that's what he's telling people,
but downstairs in the vault...
...he's creating a club.
What did you say?
You wanted to redefine decadence?
You wanted to ruin my deal...
...so you came here and brought
Carter Baizen as your wingman.
I told Rufus about Brown...
...because I was actually concerned
for you.
I'm sorry to have wasted your time.
Are you insane?
Battlestar kicks TNG's a*s.
What other show in history
has been asked to speak at the UN?
An organization that condemns
terrorism while secretly funding it...
...hosts a panel for a show
that glorifies t*rrorists. Dude.
-I can't even look at you right now.
-Don't look.
What do you think?
-Trust me, you don't wanna know.
-I do. I do wanna know.
Oh, thank God.
Man, I'm really glad you decided
to come to the party.
Thanks, man, that's....
Vanessa cares about you a lot and I
know that she was hoping you'd come.
-You know that.
-Right. Yeah, yeah. I know that.
VANESSA: There he is.
-Oh, speak of the devil. Hey.
To.... To fresh starts.
-I'm happy you're here, Humphrey.
-Me too.
So, Scott, you are in big trouble.
I cannot believe you told Vanessa...
...to take Professor Rifkin
for Art in the World.
-Why? I mean, I liked him.
-Dude, he's totally old school.
Not to mention just plain old.
I mean, his lecture notes
are literally turning yellow with age.
Please, do tell, what other professors
are you recommending?
Let's hear it, because
Katie's gonna have to weigh in.
I'm at a party.
I don't feel like taking a test now.
Excuse me, everyone! Can you please--?
Stop with that noise. Hi, everyone.
What the hell?
Well, most of you don't know me.
My name is Blair Waldorf.
But a lot of you know my roommate
who threw this amazing party, Georgina.
[CHEERING]
Yeah, I know. Georgina rocks, right?
It's funny, because I never knew
that a Jesus freak...
...could throw such a good party,
but I guess I was wrong.
So everyone raise a glass
or a plastic cup of foam...
...to the coolest Christian I know,
Georgina Sparks.
[SINGING] What do you know?
What do you know?
What do you know about Jesus?
What do you know?
What do you know?
What do you know about the Lord?
What do you know?
What do you know about Jesus
And his love?
Oh, my God. This is a conversion party.
I can't believe it.
Georgina threw this party...
...and invited all her friends here
to convert the vulnerable freshmen.
GOSSIP GIRL: Seems that Blair Waldorf
has finally found Jesus...
...and invited him
to crash Georgina's party.
WAITER: Thank you, sir.
-Carter, wait.
That's the reason you wanted me
to go out with you.
You knew I'd help you
screw over Chuck.
Chuck had screwed me over.
At least I thought he had.
I wanted to get him back.
Listen to you. You're acting out
because Daddy doesn't love you?
Is that why you skipped out on Brown?
-Please.
-No.
I told you how I felt
and you blew me off...
...until you needed someone to do your
work. It's time to find a new bad habit...
...because it's not gonna be me
anymore.
-VIP.
GIRL: Yeah, I know.
VIP room at the Monkey Bar.
Monkey Bar.
-Can't wait.
-Limo's downstairs.
We were worried. We missed you.
I can't tell you how my heart filled with
joy when we got your call inviting us...
-...to share his glory with your friends.
-I didn't invite you here.
We thought our lamb
had been lost for good.
-I am lost.
BLAIR: I'm taking over the VIP room.
Hope I see you there. Monkey Bar.
-Limo's downstairs.
-Blair, what are you doing?
Georgina was turning everyone
against me. You were just a casualty.
Don't worry,
your loyalty's been rewarded.
Your name's on the list. Yours isn't.
Georgina wasn't turning people against
you, Blair. You tried to bribe people...
...with sushi parties and gift bags,
and nobody liked it.
I don't need these losers to like me
in order to follow me.
Fear works better, anyway.
Dan, you've experienced social Siberia.
If you wanna try something new,
I'll see you at Monkey Bar.
I didn't know there was
a cool crowd at college.
You and I were the only ones
dumb enough to believe that.
Hey. So some of us are wondering
if you're gonna go to Monkey Bar.
You know, just because someone
has to be on top...
...doesn't mean it has to be Blair.
When you get downstairs,
you'll find limos waiting to take you.
And no sticking your head
out the sunroof.
This isn't East Ridge High School
prom.
-Bye.
DAN: Hello, hey. Excuse me.
Can I get everybody's attention, please?
Hey, hi. Hello. I'm Dan.
I just wanna let everybody know here
that Blair Waldorf...
...over there invited some people
from Georgina's past...
...just so she could embarrass her.
But we're also in college, and college
is a place where you're not judged...
...about what you believe or friends.
You're here to make new friends.
All right, so last time I checked--
I mean....
I think this party was pretty fun, right?
Yeah, okay.
So who wants to leave with Blair?
All right, and who wants to stay here
and drink cheap beer with me?
It's a no-brainer. Here you go.
Thank you.
You didn't have to do that.
Yeah, I did.
Let's get a beer.
GOSSIP GIRL: Uh-oh, B, looks like
your new flock was just led astray...
...and by Dan Humphrey no less.
I guess they know a false prophet
when they see one.
Hi.
-Mind if I join you?
-It's your home.
Dan told you I was here?
I was...
...glad you felt like
you could come here.
That you felt like
this was a safe place.
I'm really sorry, Rufus. I never meant
for it to get this messed up.
-None of it was your fault.
-Well, I didn't help matters.
I shouldn't have blown up at you
the way that I did.
So talk to me.
Well....
I called Brown and deferred for a year.
-Okay.
-May have been for the wrong reasons...
...at the time, I think.
Well, no, I know
that it was the right decision.
I would've been going
because my mom wanted me to go.
While that's a good reason,
that's not good enough.
You know, I did the same thing.
Well, it was Rutgers, not Brown.
But I got in and I realized that
if I didn't pursue music, I'd never do it.
I wish I had that same sense
of purpose...
...but I hope that if I take this time
that I'll find it.
Gosh, how am I gonna tell my mom?
Maybe I could help you figure that out.
I know I'm not the first guy
that your mom's brought into your life...
...but if you and Eric will let me...
...I'd really like to be more to you
than....
Than just Lily's most recent husband.
Let me help you with this.
Wow, I....
I would really appreciate that, Rufus.
I'm sorry, Mom. It wasn't my intention
to embarrass you or Daddy.
I wouldn't be doing this
if I didn't feel the way I do.
I really, really like him, and--
Mom, please don't be like that.
Mom?
I guess we didn't fool the doorman.
So you told your mom the truth?
I didn't wanna risk everything
with my family...
...for some fling
that wasn't gonna last.
But?
Well, if your family can accept us
together, maybe one day mine will too.
And if not?
That's a risk that I'm willing to take.
There's a reason we never
went downtown. It's awful.
The minute you cross Fourteenth Street,
people forget there's a class system.
B, you will find your place.
Just give it time.
No, I found my place,
and it's at the bottom.
It's a point of pride now
that I see who's on top.
Anyway, it's all turned out
for the best.
If I hadn't been distracted,
I would've forced you to go to Brown.
That's sweet,
but, no, you wouldn't have.
I am sorry I pulled a disappearing act
on you.
I'm sure you'll find a way
to make it up to me...
...in the handbag department
at Bendels.
Now, normally I'd be more worried
about Brown...
...but you actually seem a lot better
than you have in a while.
I really am.
It was so much easier when it was just
about where we sat on the Met steps.
Yeah, but we've....
We've been here, done this.
But I was so good at it.
Well, then, it's time for a new challenge
for both of us.
I'm glad you're not going to Brown.
I need you here.
Same.
-Bye.
-Bye, you.
I'm sorry I'm late,
but I have a good excuse.
-What is this?
-A review...
...of all the professors I had this
summer. Look, I even gave them grades.
Oh. This is amazing.
Sorry for that weird moment
with Katie last night.
I think I got a little overwhelmed
from meeting all your friends.
That's okay. That was kind of
the least weird part of the whole night.
When Dan got on the mic and
he convinced everyone to stay...
...that was insane.
-Is he usually like that?
-No.
Dan is more of
a corner-of-the party guy.
Should I call him? See if he'll join us?
Call him later. I just wanna be
with you right now.
-What do you want?
-There's a reason I come back to you...
...and it's not because
you're my bad habit.
What, then?
You're the one who understood
why I needed to find my father.
You were there for me during all of that,
and I trust you.
-Anyone would've done the same thing.
-No, they wouldn't have.
And I don't want anyone else.
I want you.
You were right about the dorms.
The lighting is awful.
Are you okay?
I am now.
[CELL PHONE RINGING]
[GROANS]
-Hello?
-Hey.
You wanna meet me and Scott
so we can download about last night?
No, you know what? I'm still a little
wrecked, so I'll call you later.
Okay. Bye.
GOSSIP GIRL:
Apparently higher education...
...doesn't make for smarter decisions.
So take out your notebooks
and sharpen your pencils, kids.
Gossip Girl's going to college
and this class has a lot to learn.