- Hello, one and all,
and welcome back to "Dimension 20 LIVE
presents Fantasy High: Sophomore Year!"
I'm your humble dungeon
master, Brennan Lee Mulligan.
With me as always are our intrepid heroes.
Say "Hi, intrepid heroes."
- Hi, intrepid heroes.
- If you're tuning in tonight,
thank you so much for
coming in and playing.
We're back in 2020, g*ng.
I wanted to take a second
here to talk to you guys
and say we are so grateful for
you guys watching the show.
We love you guys.
Obviously, this last week,
a lot of our friends at
CollegeHumor said goodbye
and were laid off, and we
wanted to say that we love them,
including some friends of the show,
Mike Trapp and Rekha Shankar.
- And some enemies of the show,
like Ann and Ryan.
- And some enemies
of the show.
Jess Ross and Lily Du.
Some really wonderful people.
Information's gonna be coming out.
Andrew Bridgman, who runs the
social for "Dimension 20,"
is making an awesome website
where you guys watching at home
can go and hire CollegeHumor people.
- Oh, hell yeah.
- That's gonna come out-
- For birthdays or...
- Check it out.
I assume that half of our fans
own media companies, so...
- Everybody's got one these days.
- We're the number one
actual-play for CEOs.
- For CEOs.
- A huge percentage of our audience
is going.
- Jeff Bezos is just going...
- But we're sending lots of love
to all of our extended
CollegeHumor family tonight.
And we also wanted to let you guys know
that tonight we're actually airing
a new Dimension 20 side
quest, so "Tiny Heist,"
which features Jess Ross and Lily Du
along with the McElroy family,
is coming out on Thursdays
for the next few weeks.
There's six episodes.
Episode number two comes out tonight.
So, you know, after you watch
the continuing adventures of the Bad Kids,
you know, go get a snack.
And then at midnight Pacific time,
you'll have a new episode
of "Tiny Heist" to watch.
- Content, content, content.
- It's all about-
- Snacks, snacks.
- Snacks.
It's all about snacks, baby.
Last we left off our Bad Kids,
teenage heroes of the
Aguefort Adventuring Academy
have been on a quest their spring break
to retrieve the crown
of the Nightmare King.
Their quest has brought
them to Bastion City,
the pirate city of Leviathan,
to Kei Lumennura, the
land where horny elves...
teen elves are sent to be banished.
And our friends are now
heading to Calethriel Tower
to rescue Adaine Abernant
from the clutches of the Elven government.
They have some elemental pylons
that they've found that
they're trying to dismantle.
And also, Adaine has just triggered
some kind of auto warning
from Arthur Aguefort
about f*cking with his students.
Lo and behold, we return
now to the world of Spyre,
the continuing quest to retrieve
the crown of the Nightmare King!
- Woo!
- How about it?
So, we are in the forests of Fallinel.
In the valley before you,
you observe the tall tower of Calethriel.
This is, of course, the Bad Kids,
your associated hirelings and hangers-on.
And the two elemental pylons that you know
are powering the tower are,
there's kind of a rubbly
old tower far up on a ridge,
and there's a small plume of smoke
coming from a smithy or some kind of small
wood-burning place off in the woods,
a little bit closer to Calethriel Tower.
Last week, you guys had
made kind of a loose plan
to spread off in those
different directions.
Do you guys remember who you had said
you wanted to go where?
Were the hirelings going one place?
- Yeah.
- I'm going to Adaine.
- I think you and Kristen
are going to Adaine.
- Yeah.
- And I believe me, Gorgug,
and Fabian are going
to the smoke one?
- To the smoke.
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
- We're going to the pylon with the smoke.
- Okay.
- And then the hirelings are
going to the further one.
- Cool, they're going to the tower.
Sandra Lynn will have no
problem getting them there.
Tracker can fly and carry someone,
so that's not
a bad call.
- Tracker can fly?
- Tracker can change into a spirit form
that can fly.
- Oh, I forgot.
- You see Gilear looks up and says,
"And the van, what of the van and myself?"
- The van we put in
your ever-capable hands.
- Gilear, and it's very important to me
that you know that we trust you
and that you do not get behind the wheel
under any circumstance.
- "I shall remain with the van
and I shall not drive it
under any circumstance."
- The van just couldn't
handle your heavy foot.
- "Yes, my feet are, especially my right,
is extremely... There's
a lot of fluid in there."
- Oh, no.
- That's not what I was referring to.
I meant a metaphor.
- It looks like
you hurt your foot.
- You need to go
to the doctor.
- A metaphor
for dangerous driving, but okay.
- Did you roll your ankle?
- "Oh, months ago, yes.
A long, not here
on the adventure."
- Oh, no!
- "There's sort of, there's
a part above the sock
that's turned like a band
of purple around it."
- Wait, so when we healed
you from being dead,
it didn't fix the ankle?
- "No, I think there's
some kind of bone issue
or something that it
can't heal quite right.
It's all right, the
pain is kind of ambient.
It's not...
It's not acute, it's sort of throbbing.
And it's kind of nice too,
because all the extra
blood kind of warms it up
and I don't have heat on in my apartment."
- What about our friend?
- Yeah.
Yeah.
- We had some kind of plan, right?
- Yeah.
- Yes, it's like, you guys
are like transporting in
or something like that?
- We could. We could.
- Ayda's gonna do Invisibility, right?
- Yeah, Ayda looks and says,
"I can cast Invisibility
on all three of us
and we can go into the tower together."
- Also, I don't want to assume anything,
but you're a bird?
- "Mh?"
- Are you part bird?
Can you fly us in or no?
- "We have established
that I'm half phoenix."
- Okay, good.
I just, you know when sometimes
it comes out of your mouth
and you're like, is this okay?
- "Yes, absolutely.
It is okay."
- Okay, good.
- "You didn't just hurt my feelings."
- Good.
- Can you fly?
- "Yes, I can fly."
- So could you fly-
- So let's be
invisible and fly.
- With us?
- "I can turn you invisible
and then fly us all there."
- Done!
- Great.
- "Very good."
You see that she casts
Invisibility on you and says,
"I'm going to have to touch
you to pick you up and fly you.
Can I grab you in sort of a hug?"
- Enthusiastic consent.
- I go for the hug.
- "Okay, good.
It's happening."
And you see that she takes off flying.
As she does, the three
of you guys start heading
towards the smithy, which is closer.
The hirelings take off and start flying.
As you guys begin to take off, however,
you see there is a crash of lightning.
We cut to Calethriel Tower.
The little alert sort of
vanishes for a moment.
Adaine, you're in your
bubble and you see that Kir
and your father kind of
turn to stare at each other.
And you see as they turn,
the turn begins to slow down
and
a rift opens up and you
see Arthur Aguefort's desk.
You see him sort of rub one of his eyes,
look out and say, "Oh, Miss Abernant,
someone just selected the way of pain
on one of these auto notifications?"
- Yes.
Sorry, I didn't...
Hello.
I'm kidnapped in a tower and
they have my sister locked
in a orb and have done for five months.
I feel like that's t*rture.
- "Who, what institution has done this?"
- Oh, the high elves of Fallinel.
- "Very well, let's do it."
He crawls through
the rift that he's made.
He steps out, looks around and he says,
"Ah, indeed, we are in Fallinel.
All right, well, if they were dumb enough
to push that button, we'll make them pay."
He leaps out of the window of the tower.
And as he does, you don't see him fall
and realize the reason he's not falling
is because he's growing
as fast as he's falling.
- Woo!
- And a 80 foot, 150 foot,
300 foot Arthur Aguefort appears.
You guys see this happen even faster
as time begins to change and reform.
Arthur turns down and says,
"Attention, elves of Fallinel.
Today your nation falls!"
And reaches a hand up into
the sky, towering overhead.
And you see his hand moves behind the sun
and wraps around it.
- What?
- And as he closes his hand
around the sun, he goes,
"Gah!" and his veins
light up with golden fire.
His mouth opens, "Gah,"
fire races across the sky.
And he goes, "Agueforts
of the earth, to w*r!"
And thousands of terracotta
Arthur Agueforts begin to-
- What?
- To burst out of the ground
and just sprint north away
from Calethriel Tower.
- Can I just say, this
isn't part of the game,
but Brennan did have a
really bad fever recently.
- And I think it is showing.
Thousands of terracotta Agueforts.
- So they're going away from the tower?
- Yes, you see that the-
- Aguefort, we're down here,
watch out for us!
- The like mountain-sized Aguefort
that is clutching the sun.
- He's gonna punt that thing.
- You see he holds it
and begins to drag it across the sky.
- What?
- "Aaah!" and one giant step.
And you see that it
leaves a like burning scar
across the sky as he starts moving it.
And you see that-
- Do we need to do anything?
- You're all seeing this.
- I'm ready to die!
- What are we, is this good?
- You see that the giant Aguefort
takes long, slow, thudding
steps across the valley
as thousands of terracotta
Agueforts stream
through the woods.
And within minutes, he is gone
and all of them are just
leaving to go north.
- What's north?
Is that north of the tower?
- That means something...
- Their actual city,
I guess, right?
- Something's gonna happen.
I mean, if he's trying to save you,
he's probably not gonna destroy the city.
- Maybe it's just like a distraction
and we should just keep doing our plan.
- Okay, yeah, let's do it.
- Yeah, can we do an Insight check
to see if that's what's going on?
- Anyone that would like to
can make an Insight check.
- What's north?
- Oh, sweet, 26.
- I got a dirty 20.
- I got an 18, though.
- You heard, with the 26,
you heard the massive
Aguefort basically bellow,
you know, like "Elves of Fallinel,
you will pay for what
you have done this day."
The magic you're seeing is
beyond the scope of mortal...
You had no idea that
Arthur was able to do this.
- Grab the sun.
- Grab the sun, have it
light his veins on fire
and his glowing eyes.
You watch as he marches,
his eyes glow like golden bright
and just lasers the size of, you know,
like highways race out of his eyes
and he just caps a range of mountains.
As he marches north.
- Hey, Ayda, do you want to call your dad
and warn him that we're here?
- Ayda has landed and is like,
"Um, I..."
- Wait, are you-
- I didn't know
he could do that?
- "I guess.
I didn't know he could
specifically do that."
- Did he-
- "Did he look at me?
Do you think he saw me or?"
- He definitely didn't see you,
but is this a normal thing for your dad?
Or is this, do you think
that really was your dad?
- "It seems like something
he would try to do.
I didn't know that he was able to do that,
but it seems like something
that he would maybe do."
- I don't think he saw you,
but it's only because
your Invisibility spell
was that good.
- Yeah.
- "Have you said something
so kind on purpose?"
- Yeah.
- "Thank you."
- Remember, we're
transitively best friends.
- "I really appreciate that.
Sometimes people say nice things,
but they didn't mean it,
or you inferred the nice thing,
but the way you said it, it was very nice.
I appreciate that.
Okay, let's keep flying to the tower."
She lifts you guys up.
So Adaine, so you watch Kir
and your dad see this happen.
Kir is horrified and says,
"I'm going to alert the Elven government."
She rushes up, but you do also see
that Arthur has not sprung you
or done anything to help
in any meaningful way.
So your father just kind of
looks back at you and says,
"Do you know what... Is
this part of the plan?
Do you guys get informed
about this in an assembly?"
- Yes.
I knew that was going to
happen as soon as you pressed,
as she pressed the pain button.
None of this is a surprise to me.
- "Hmm, well, you're
certainly telling the truth."
And you see that he,
you see that he rushes
off out of your room
into the tower as well.
And we're going to begin
with our group headed
towards the first pylon, the smithy.
- Can you say that we're all like running
like anime characters?
- Yes, all arms straight back out,
running at the same time.
Okay, you guys arrive.
Are you trying to arrive
there stealthily or no?
- I mean, considering the
massive chaos happening,
like stealthily considering that,
but maybe like a little faster
than we would have normally.
- Gotcha.
- Yeah, I think we're in
kind of like a forest, right?
So I think we're going,
we're sprinting tree to tree.
- Cool.
You guys move, you guys move.
You see this...
as you guys arrive,
you see that there is a
a large Elven smithy.
Looking through the open archway,
it's sort of this small, like green,
moss-covered stone building,
smoke pouring out of it.
In the center of the building,
you see that there are
basically like three large
fiery braziers, right?
These huge, like silvery
Elven dishes piled high
with burning coals,
and that it's causing the
smoke to rise up out of this.
You see that there are
also three Elven statues
at the other corners
of this kind of hexagonal,
six-pointed room
that are Elven statues
that are holding huge pitchers of water.
In the center of this smithy is a,
so hot it's hard to
look at, it's so bright,
deep fire pit, and that has
like a helix of magic within it
going around and around and around.
That central pit is what
you think is the source
of a lot of the magical energy
that is going to Calethriel Tower
to power its permanent magical effects.
- Okay.
- What do you guys do as you behold?
- Perception checks for other entities?
- Everyone make Perception checks.
- Yeah.
- I can see those statues
being some tricky...
- Perception.
- 18.
- 16.
- Ooh, not great, 10.
- You do not see any people of any kind
here within the pylon.
- So we got water, and we got fire.
Maybe we douse them?
- We use the Elven-
- There's braziers, there's three?
And then there's three things of water?
- Yes, there's three braziers,
there's three things of water.
- And then the thing in the center?
- And then the thing in the center.
The braziers of coals
are in different corners,
so if it's like a six-cornered smithy,
it's sort of like one,
two, three braziers,
and then in the opposite corners,
facing away from each other,
it's one, two, three statues with water.
The pitchers, you notice,
gear down towards the central fire pit.
There's almost a channel or a runnel
or something like that
that comes off the pitchers going down.
The pitchers don't look like
they would naturally move
towards the braziers in the corner.
- Oh, they look like they
spill in and go to the center?
- Yes.
- Can we inspect the braziers?
Maybe see if, like, there's-
- Give me an Investigation
check for the braziers.
- Can somebody help me?
- I can help you.
- Well, too late, I already rolled.
- Ooh!
- Yeah, baby.
- Nice.
- That is a, da-da-da,
27.
- And I got a two.
- Ooh!
- A 27?
The braziers are, you recognize them
from a, like, rogue tomb-raiding manual?
These are traps,
and these are specifically
Conjure Elemental traps.
- Guys, this is Tomb-Raiding 101.
These are Conjure Elemental traps.
- So how do you set them off?
Would you know that?
Or, like, should we?
- So, I mean, well, I
mean, the question is,
is there a way around it,
or do we just have to deal with it?
- Here's the thing.
Tomb-Raiding 101 only
teaches us how to find traps,
not necessarily how to disarm them.
- I like to imagine Riz
is dressed as Tomb Raider
all of a sudden.
- Except a little blue.
- Riz looks so hot.
- Well, we gotta,
I don't think we have too
much time to figure it out.
- Yeah, all right.
- Why don't we all go
towards one of the statues?
Because I don't understand how
the braziers really fit in.
- I bet you if we use the water,
we definitely need to use the water
to put out the thing in the middle.
If we do that, I bet you
one of these elementals
will pop up.
Here's an idea.
I'll go do it.
You guys get ready to just bash
it as soon as it comes out.
- Yeah, let's try to, like,
only go towards one of the things
so we don't set off
everything, just in case.
- Right on.
All right.
Should I go climb up and
try to get some water going?
And then you guys are just,
like, ready to destroy
- Hell yeah
- One of these things.
- All right.
- All right.
- I believe in you.
- Hell yeah, I believe in you.
- I believe in you.
- I believe in you.
- Hell yeah, you guys all
believe in each other.
- I believe in two of these people.
- Very, very exciting.
- I believe in the three of us.
- I'm not sure about myself,
but the two of you have got this.
- But overall, the six of us at large.
- You move in.
That Investigation lets you avoid
what you see as being some possible areas
where you could just set
something off on the floor.
You, like, hop up into an alcove.
Go actually ahead and give
me an Acrobatics check.
- Can somebody toss me and help me?
- Can I toss?
- I'd like to toss The Ball.
- Yeah.
- Go ahead and give me
an Athletics check.
- Can I help you?
- Yeah.
- You could help.
- Gorgug gives a help action.
Give me, yeah.
Give me Athletics-
- This is really supportive.
with advantage.
- That's gonna be 22.
- Cool.
So you pick up Riz in your hand
and you sail, bam, land on the statue
without touching anything on the floor.
Land on the first statue.
- Like a little spider
monkey, or like a kite.
A kite.
Squirrel.
- Really good job everyone.
I believe in you, I believe in you.
- I like the support.
- Give me another Investigation check
as you arrive behind this brazier.
- 13.
- Immediately what you see is-
- Is he on the pitcher or the brazier?
- You're on the statue
with the pitcher, right?
So you're on the statue
with the pitcher there.
I see this, like, Elven statue here.
Immediately what you see
is all the infrastructure
of this place, like everything,
bears this high Elven
adoration for arcane magic.
So as a result of that,
you see that you need
a cantrip to trigger...
that these pitchers,
there's an easy way to
make these pitchers move,
which is just a cantrip that
would allow them to bend over.
For you, you're gonna have
to figure out some way
to mechanically or otherwise disable
or deal damage to cause
these pitchers to move.
- Oh yeah, they didn't care
about physical strength.
- We don't.
- That's right.
- Yeah, we don't know how to use magic.
- I am the greatest wizard of our time.
- I believe in you,
but also we should have brought
somebody who knows magic.
- Can I go into a rage and
just jump at this statue?
- Yeah, well, okay.
- Yeah, you can go into a rage.
- Wait, wait, no, no, no, no.
- Okay, come on, come on.
You're ready to attack?
I believe in you.
I believe in you, but wait, okay?
- Okay, do you wanna just sh**t it off?
- Yes.
- I mean, yeah, that's, okay, great, yeah.
- That's clearly, that's the move, right?
- I mean, it feels like
either you sh**t it off
or you do blunt-
- But he's down there
waiting for the elementals.
- Smack, okay, great.
I'm gonna sh**t, and then
we're gonna reassess.
I believe in you, I believe in you.
- I believe in you.
- Bam.
- All right, I'm gonna
let you know right now.
- That I did a bad job?
- No, you did not do...
There is a damage threshold here.
- Oh, okay, cool.
- The damage threshold is 15.
You need to do at least
15 points of damage
to do any damage.
And then it's 20 hit points
that the mechanism on the statue has.
- Okay.
- You go ahead and roll
an attack roll as normal.
You can add your Sneak Attack to this.
- Oh, sweet, okay.
- 16 to hit?
- 16 hits.
- Great, okay.
Let's do this.
- The statue never saw it coming.
- Ooh, very good.
- Very good.
- 28.
- 28.
Riz.
Bam.
You nail the...
- Great job, Riz.
- Boom.
And you see the pitcher
lurches forward off the broken statue.
This bright, clear water
surges out of this alabaster pitcher,
races down, hits the central fire.
The helix changes from golden green
to a weird arcane purple gold.
Just...
And the first brazier next to the door
roars into life.
- Initiative from everybody.
- k*ll it, k*ll it,
k*ll it, k*ll it.
- Great!
- You guys have readied actions,
but the way this is gonna work
is that basically you two
guys get a surprise round.
- Great, okay.
- We roll initiative, though, right?
- Do roll initiative, yes.
- 11 for me, initiative.
- 22.
- 21.
- Okay.
- Here we go, Fabian.
- This is good, this is a good plan.
- This is good, I like this.
- Fabian?
- I love the amount of support
we're all giving each other.
This is good.
- Positivity.
- Yes, we have each other's backs.
We're a team.
- All right, Fabian, you
act first without surprise.
Let me ask you a question.
Would you have gone to the
statue closest to the door
or one further away from the door?
- I think probably the one closest.
- Cool.
Fabian, you are first to act.
- Great.
Can I do an Arcana check?
Is this just like a
classic fire elemental?
Nothing special.
- Classic fire elemental.
- Great.
Then we'll just swing... I'll stab it.
- What sword are you attacking with?
- I guess I'll... I don't have, or I do.
- Do you have something magical?
- I don't have anything.
I don't think I have the sword.
Do I still have the Sword
of the Seacasters on me?
- It has been placed in front of you
a number of times.
But whether Fabian would be
fighting with it right now
is up to you.
- I think I timidly just take it out
and I'll swing at it with one.
- Cool.
Go ahead and give me an attack roll.
- That's going to be a 25.
- 25 hits.
- Great.
And that'll be 11.
- That is 11 points of damage.
You rush up, slash, are you
gonna take your second attack?
- I don't have one.
- That's right.
- And then I will take my movement
to stand timidly behind Gorgug.
- Hold on.
- Or no, I'm not gonna
leave a threatened area.
- You also take
five fire damage.
- Okay, great.
- Right away, right off the bat.
- Hey, Fabian, you're on fire, dude.
- What?
No, no.
- You're on fire.
- You have not ignited.
- Okay.
- But you do take five
points of fire damage.
And as you move away, it is
gonna take a swipe at you.
- Great.
- Oh, you did move away?
- I am going to move away.
- It misses.
- Okay, yeah.
Catching on fire.
Oh, stop!
- I believe in you.
I'm sure you can find a way
to not be on fire anymore.
- Gorgug, you are next acting.
Riz and the elemental, you guys
lose your turn for surprise.
- I'm gonna go into a rage.
- Hell, yeah.
- And then I'm gonna
recklessly attack this bad boy
while there's one.
- Yeah, do it up.
- Nat 20.
- Yes!
- Very good.
- Love to see it.
- And that means-
- That's gonna be three
D12 plus whatever you have
because you have savage attacks for-
- Three D12 plus six.
Oh, wait, do I have savage attacks?
- You're raging because it's plus eight.
- Do I get?
Oh yeah.
Okay, great.
Yes.
- And it is three D12.
- Do you need another one?
- Plus, I'm sorry.
Raging makes it plus eight?
Oh yeah, that's true.
Okay, great.
So here's, so that's 11 and
a two and then one more.
Oh, I'll just do one more.
And then a five.
So 11, two, five.
- 18.
- 18 plus six on the first attack.
- Or plus eight on the
first attack, right?
- Oh yeah, plus eight.
18 plus eight is 26.
- Jeez.
- So 26 on the first hit
and it's a magical weapon,
if that matters.
- It does matter.
- And then it's also,
you knock your subject
prone with Zelda's mixtape.
- Oh, you're listening to Zelda's mixtape.
So Fabian, you went up,
slashing this thing.
It sets you a little bit on fire.
Gorgug, bam!
This thing is on its fiery a*s.
- Okay.
And then I'll take my second attack.
- Go for it.
- Okay.
Worse.
16?
- 16 hits.
- Okay.
And so that's just one D12 plus eight.
Okay.
19 on that one.
- 19 damage.
Damn.
- I believe in you.
- You did two equally good turns, guys.
- I believe in all of us.
- You both did really good.
- We both did do good.
- You both did great.
- Yes.
Oh.
Oh.
Come on.
Come on, Fabian.
- You also, when you hit this thing,
do take five points of
fire damage right away.
That is going to be Fabian.
Your turn again.
- What?
- Yeah, keep going.
- Yeah.
- Okay.
I'm gonna run up and hit it again.
- Go for it.
- It's on the ground too.
Do you get advantage?
- You do get advantage, actually, yeah.
- Crit.
- I didn't crit, but I did get a 19.
If I were a fighter, that
would mean something.
So that'll hit.
And then that'll be a 13.
- 13 points of damage? Hell yeah.
- And then I'd like to run
back behind Gorgug again.
- Awesome.
That is going to be Riz's turn.
- Sweet.
I'm going to sh**t the fire elemental.
- Ooh, two, ten...
19?
- 19 hits.
- Sweet.
- And you do get Sneak Attack
because this thing is prone
and both of your friends
are wailing.
- I'm looking at Riz
like, I believe in you.
- You, The Ball.
- Just sh**ting dangerously close to you.
- It's just like right here.
- It was right over your thumbs up.
- 25 damage.
- Ooh, baby.
This thing is already looking hurt.
- Good plan, everyone.
- Good plan.
- Are we going to k*ll this one
and then do the next pitcher?
Is that what?
"I have
been summoned and bound by the
elves of old
to protect this sacred pylon.
Please stop hitting me with your weapon."
- Oh, right, we didn't speak to you.
- If we had not hit you
and asked you to not attack us,
would you have not attacked us?
- Eat my a*s, dude!
- "Get out of here, get out of here."
You did reckless attack,
so it's going to get some
advantage on attacking Gorgug.
Hold on one second.
That's gonna be a hit.
That's gonna be a hit as well.
It deals you first 10
and then 14 points of fire damage.
Your rage does not halve that.
And you are also ignited
and fully on fire.
- You're on fire, Gorgug.
You're on fire, dude.
- We're in a good team.
- You're on fire.
You're good.
- You're on fire, but I believe in you.
- And Gorgug, that's gonna be...
that is your turn, Gorgug.
- Would I know how to
not be on fire anymore?
- You can take an action
to douse yourself.
- Can I put you out?
- Although you do take another five points
of fire damage at the start of your turn.
- At the start of my turn?
Okay, so I'm at 85.
Look, Fabian, do you want to try to?
- Yes, very much so.
- Okay, yes, I'll do that.
- Keep going, Gorgug.
- I'm just gonna recklessly
attack him again.
- Go for it.
- All right.
That'll hit.
And so.
Nine damage on the first one.
Another reckless attack.
That'll hit.
This is, uh,
11, so I did 21 or 20 damage so far.
- You know, you guys are rushing in here.
This is one of the first adventures
you guys have had out here on spring break
where you guys like have a plan.
You know what's going on.
You rush into your first pitcher down.
Gorgug, you're set on fire,
but you guys got the jump on this thing
and wailed on its a*s right away.
And you, two more mighty blows.
Bam, bam!
There's a blast of fire.
You're still ignited.
- Yes!
- This thing goes-
- Spring break!
- We're doing it!
- Spring break!
- We're doing it!
- You guys yell "Spring
break" as you're on fire.
- Spring break!
- Fabian, that is your turn.
- I'd like to take my
turn to put Gorgug out.
- Cool, you take an action.
You douse Gorgug.
You are no longer on fire.
- You have one of those
silk blankets you can use.
- You put the blanket out,
and the blanket perfectly drifts
and like wraps around you.
And there's a little Elven
like,
and it sort of breathes the fire off you.
- Oh good.
- Everyone knows elven
sheets can put out fires.
Fabian, that is your turn.
Riz, your turn.
- Great, okay.
No more elementals?
- No more elemental.
There are two more segments of the room.
- Sweet, okay.
Everybody get ready to attack things.
- However, you do see, though,
that there is clearly
some like alarm or signal
from within the changed fire,
which was probably, you know,
this is like literally where
the energy is coming from.
Someone attacking it or f*cking with it
was definitely gonna be noticed somewhere.
But there is a, you know,
450 foot Arthur Aguefort
stomping north somewhere.
- So hopefully, yeah.
- Hopefully.
- Great.
- Yeah, let's just keep going.
- All right, I'm gonna
sh**t another statue.
- Go for it.
- Sweet.
- Oh, can we?
Oh, nevermind.
- Yeah!
- Oh!
- Yeah, 24.
- 24.
Hell yeah.
Go ahead and roll that
Sneak Attack damage.
- Such a dramatic pause.
- Yeah.
You held that.
- 23.
- Woo!
Pitcher lurches forward.
Suddenly, it is this gleaming,
bright ruby red helix
of energy coming out of the fire
as the second of the two water pitchers
moves into the middle
and another elemental
springs out of the brazier,
acts on the next initiative,
which is the one coming up right now.
Races forward and is going to
take some attacks on you, Riz.
- Oh, I should have hidden.
We had a good plan on the first one, g*ng.
- You are immediately ignited.
And you take 10 points of damage
followed by another 11 points of damage.
- Oh.
- 21?
- You guys don't have a healer, do you?
- No.
- Interesting.
- Spring break!
- I'll douse you, don't worry.
- It's the blanket boy!
- And I have Healing Word.
- I slowly sheathe my sword
and I'm just holding this blanket.
- Hey, the worse we're doing,
the better the other teams are doing.
Yeah, you should remember that, everyone.
Stay positive.
Spring break.
- You're fully on fire.
- in my head.
- You're fully on fire, so...
- Spring break.
Stay positive.
- Stay positive.
- Stay positive. Spring break.
- Gorgug, that's going to be your turn.
- Gorgug, I'm going to Frenzy on this.
Yeah, yeah.
Recklessly attack this one.
- Fabian, please put me out.
- I'm coming.
- Weirdest roll I've ever seen.
- We have the perfect
job to traumatize Fabian.
He's a firefighter.
- First one hits.
- You're fanning the flames.
- Second one hits.
And then I'm going to
use my Frenzy attack.
- Hell yeah.
- So...
Does a, yeah.
I think all three of them hit.
- Okay, awesome.
- 23 for the worst one, so.
- So that's just going
to be three D12 plus 24?
- Yeah.
- Nice.
- Okay.
- Okay, 10 and a nine plus...
- Woo, you love to see it.
- Nine.
- Nice.
- 28, 28 plus 24.
You deal 52 damage?
- I believe in us.
- Yeah!
- As you attack this thing,
you take another five
points of fire damage.
You guys definitely were right
to not send the hirelings to this one.
This was a bad one.
Just boom, boom.
- We're both on fire.
- Now Fabian has to choose
which one to put out.
- I think he just took fire damage.
- He just took fire damage.
You're ignited.
That's Gorgug.
Fabian, that's you.
- Fully sheathe my sword.
Do some light dancing with this blanket.
And then just full on run at The Ball.
- You're really in touch with
your Elven roots right now.
It's a lot of ribbon dance twirling.
And you're like, the fire
kind of curls up the sheet
and around your hands.
And you do kind of some
David Bowie orb tricks
with the fire.
- Palm, yeah.
Palm juggling.
Contact juggling.
- You do a lot of contact juggling.
Sheet's on fire.
You are doused.
Riz is doused.
Riz, that is your turn.
- Sweet.
- I found my purpose.
- I'm going to do a bonus action Disengage
by slowly backing away from the situation.
I'm gonna do a bonus action Disengage
so that I'm not getting
attacked by the fire elemental.
And then I'm going to sh**t at it.
- I imagine it's like
"Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon"
where like a sheet unfurls
and there's just no one there.
- But then I'm anime
running really loudly.
- All right, go for it.
- Oh no.
That is only a 12 to hit.
- 12 misses.
That's Riz's turn.
Elemental is going to be next.
You took reckless attacks
on your last turn, correct?
- Yes, dude.
- Okay, that's a hit for sure.
That's a hit for sure.
It's going to be...
- I mean...
- Get ready to flip out.
- Where's Tracker?
- Tracker's flying.
- 20 points of fire damage
and you are ignited.
- Okay.
- My eyes come alive.
- I really hope we don't
have to do much after this.
- You guys, by the way,
also now see that the helix
in the middle is flickering
with other energy
that looks like it's possibly failing.
Out the window, you guys see
a flash of some kind of magic
from Tracker up at the other tower.
So it looks like they've made
it to their position as well.
- Can I make a Perception
check... I'll wait until my turn?
- And it is your turn right now.
Welcome to another five
points of fire damage.
- Oh, thank you.
- Welcome to the fire zone.
- Thank you.
- Welcome to another five
points of fire damage.
It's a smith, smithy, right?
- Yes, it looks like some kind of,
but it looks like it has been built
into the shape of a smithy in,
and it's actual, it's
not a functional forage.
- So there's not like weapons anywhere
or anything like that?
- Go ahead and give me a Perception check.
- Okay.
12.
- You see that there are
some ornamental weapons
carved from stone on the statues,
but this place is really more of like,
again, like an arcane power station
than it is a working forage.
- Okay.
Well, I'm just gonna keep
recklessly attacking just because-
- I'll keep putting you out.
- Thank you. Thank you.
I'm still on fire, right?
- Yes.
- I have 55 hit points, so I don't have to
keep doing that very long.
All right.
21 hit?
- 21 hits.
- Does a 15 hit?
- A 15 does hit.
- Oh, wow.
- Yes!
- And then a 23.
- Hell yeah.
- So three hits, so it's
going to be plus, whatever.
- It is plus 24, yes.
- So that is a, that's
20 points with two dice
and another 10.
- So 30 plus 24.
- 54.
- 54.
Second elemental, Gorgug.
The fire blasts away, singes the walls.
There are no combatants
on the floor right now.
You are still ignited.
Fabian, it is your turn.
- Can I make an Athletics
check to do some cool jumps
while I put him out?
- Go ahead and give it
to me with advantage.
- Hey, thank you.
- I have the positive.
That's-
- He's thriving.
- That's 23.
- Oh, for the first time-
- He's absolutely thriving.
- For the first time,
you are feeling your body
fully express itself in combat.
And instead of like a weird compulsion
to like run into danger
and like hurt things
or attack things, you're
like saving your friends
through the power and majesty of dance.
- Oh, Fabian.
- I'm like out of breath,
like soot on my face.
I'm like singed hair like...
- I'm here for you.
- Fire comes off.
Riz, that is your turn.
- Sweet.
This is something we didn't try.
What if we put out the fire
before we do one of these things?
We have the last one.
- Everyone knows that Elven
blankets put out fires.
- Put it out, put out the brazier.
- Yeah, I guess we'll-
- I mean, it was announced that Elven,
everyone knows that Elven
blankets put out fires.
So I'd like to use common knowledge
and use my Elven blanket to
put out the third brazier.
- I know what's happening.
I see what's happening.
Um, I'm gonna get the Box of Doom.
- Yeah.
Oh no, Fabian.
- Get the Box of Doom.
This is going to be a
DC 20 Acrobatics check.
- I have advantage and plus eight.
- Can I prepare an action to hit the thing
if it comes to life?
- And I'm gonna say this, on a 20,
nothing bad will happen to you.
I wanna see, you'll see what happens
if you hit a 25 or higher.
- Great.
And this is-
- I believe in you, Fabian.
- This is, uh, this is, yeah, Acrobatics?
- Acrobatics.
- Spring break.
- God, I can't see what that one is.
I can't see what either one is.
- First one's a 16.
What does a 16 do?
- 16 gets me to 24.
- 24, awesome.
Here are your dice.
Fabian, you rush up to this brazier.
You touch something on the floor
which triggers the brazier to erupt.
- The elemental leaps out,
- Oh, no.
and as it does, you
encircle it in the sheet,
take it into the deepest
tango dip in the world.
- Oh my god.
- Now I'm gonna ask you to make a choice.
You did not hit a 25.
- Okay.
- Do you believe in the dance
enough to fully take the damage
that will come from
embracing this elemental?
- I do.
- Riz is sobbing.
- Riz is sobbing.
- Beautiful.
- You take 22 points of fire damage,
as you lean deeply into the dance.
You guys see the sheet
swirls around Fabian's body
and the elemental like roiling
up behind him in the flame
as you dip this elemental.
Before the elemental goes,
Riz, it is your turn.
- sh**t it in the head.
- I sh**t it in the head.
It's beautiful.
- The elemental right now,
give me an Insight check.
- Can I help you?
- Yeah, that'd be great, thanks.
- Help me figure this out, Gorgug.
- Oh, Nat 20.
- The elemental has been so
deeply affected by the dance
that you don't think it's in
active combat mode right now.
It might be in a state of
being partially stunned.
- It's so beautiful, Gorgug.
- You're right.
- But you do see the final
statue with the pitcher.
- I'm gonna sh**t the pitcher.
- Cool, go ahead and give me an attack.
- Yeah, baby, that's 28.
- Hell yeah, go ahead and roll damage.
- Wild stuff happening
over here at the smithy.
- The vibes are strong.
- The boys are having a weird day.
Ooh, not great rolls, but 4, 10.
Ooh, wait, four.
Six, 12.
- Can you do Fury of the Small?
- Oh yeah, I can.
18, and then if that's not enough,
I'll do Fury of the Small.
and do an extra hit.
- Fury of the Small, bam!
You hit 20 points, last pitcher.
You see that the...
Water flows.
The fire extinguishes,
this elemental that you're cradling here,
as the last brazier goes
out and the helix ends,
the thing binding this
elemental to protect this place
goes as the helix goes, and
the last pitcher's there.
So you are holding this elemental there,
and you see that it goes
from being a monstrous fire
to being a sort of Elven
face made of wreathing flame.
It looks up at you, tears of
flame streaming down its face
as you hold it, and it kisses
you so softly on the lips
for eight points of damage.
- I take it, I take it all.
I take every single point of that damage,
I take it slowly.
And I feel it in my whole body.
- As it does, you see that
a voice whispers in your ear
like flame, "Thank you for
my freedom, for my life."
And the flame goes out.
You feel a touch on your lips,
and you guys see as Fabian stands,
the sheet roiling around him,
you see that his lips are like red hot,
and that with like a
sort of gulp standing up,
badly injured,
you feel a glowing mote of fire
like descend down your throat
and rest hot and warm in your chest.
- Oh, wow.
Great job, everybody.
Great job.
- Can I take his cape and
wrap it around his shoulders
and tie it on like a, like the sheet,
and tie it on like a cape?
- You are wearing a sheet tied
around you like a superhero.
- You got that fire in your belly now.
- I do.
- You got that fire in your belly!
- Yeah, I do, The Ball.
I do, Gorgug.
Yeah.
Yes!
- Spring break!
Spring break!
- Let's go!
Let's... Spring break!
- Spring break!
- Wait a second.
Is it broken?
- The pylon is destroyed.
- Spring break.
- Fabian is like, he's like badly,
you like just performed some
act of Elven dance magic
and are badly burned.
Gorgug is badly burned behind you.
Riz, you're burned as well.
You guys got rid of the pylon
and you rush out of there.
- So hurt, so happy.
- So hurt, so happy.
- Spring break!
- Just the biggest smile on my face.
- Incredible.
We cut to Calethriel Tower.
- Ooh, I'm back.
- Oh my god.
Okay, so Calethriel Tower is
a tall, multi-story tower,
about a 10-story tower that is situated
into the edge of a walled courtyard.
So it's sort of like a little ring wall,
and then on the edge of the wall,
the tower comes up,
leaving that little garden in the middle.
You see the gate is closed.
You guys arrive looking at it.
As you guys arrive there,
go ahead and give me Perception checks.
- 10.
Wait,
11.
- 20, not Nat.
- 20, not Nat?
You look around, and Kristen,
as you're waiting there,
you look and see
the young elf maiden that
you guys fought in Leviathan
rush into the tower,
followed quickly by Adaine's
dad, Angwyn Abernant.
You also see four of
these extremely large,
like eight-foot tall...
they look kind of like green men,
where they don't look like automatons,
like the warforged you met in Leviathan,
but they're more like native spellcraft.
They're like plant beings
that are composed of magic,
but they have beautiful Elven faces.
These are sort of eight,
eight-and-a-half-foot-tall Elven giants.
Four of them walk into the tower,
and the last thing you notice with that 20
is you see some of Tracker's
magic up in that far tower,
and then you see the moon doors
that some of these guardians
came out of fade.
- Okay.
- Cool.
- I'm gonna use, we're
invisible right now.
- Yes, you are.
- I'm gonna use the
opportunity to Disguise Self
for the next hour to look
like Arthur Aguefort.
- So that if I come out of Invisibility,
they'll think I'm Aguefort.
- They'll think you're Arthur Aguefort.
- Can I, while we're invisible,
do I have a chance to
cast something on the elf
that was running in front of Adaine's dad?
- They have made it in
before the spells were off.
Now that the flow of magical
energy into the tower is gone,
you know that all the
permanent magical effects
that were on this place are now dispelled.
- But those soldiers aren't.
- Those soldiers are not.
So you have to worry about
Kir, the young Elven woman,
Adaine's father,
and whatever those guardians were.
- Okay.
- I think if you cast a
spell when you're invisible,
you come out of Invisibility, I think.
- I believe, I think it depends.
- If it's Lesser Invisibility.
- With Lesser Invisibility, yeah.
And that's what-
- And that's what she did.
- Oh, so I guess I, maybe
I cast Disguise Self
before I got in the game.
- Are we able, what do you guys think?
Should we fly and try to
find Adaine in a window?
- Yeah, let's try to fly into a window.
- Cool.
Go ahead and give me a Perception check.
- 20, not Nat.
- Oh, 21, not.
- You guys spot a window up
at the very top of the tower.
Ayda looks at it and
says, "Good, that's us."
She picks you up, flies
to that top of the tower.
As she does, you see
Adaine suspended in an orb
in that top tower.
- Wait, if the magic is gone,
shouldn't the orb be gone as well?
- The orb is a spell
that no longer has the re-up effect.
- Oh, okay, so in like
an hour, it'll be gone.
- Exactly.
- Oh, wait, if I cast a cantrip,
do I come out of Invisibility?
- Yes, if you cast a cantrip,
you'll come out of Invisibility.
- Damn.
Can we, let's just-
- Oh, we see, yeah, no
one's in that room, right?
- Let's just punch this
window, we'll get in.
- Do you have the weird sword still?
- I think I gave James Whitclaw's
sword back to the city.
I just wanted to keep it.
- Hell yeah.
As you guys fly to the
window, you guys rush in.
Go ahead and give me an attack roll
on that window if you're attacking.
- 10?
- 10 does not hit.
There's no way now to stay
under Invisibility, right?
Because you're kinda like,
you gotta attack the window
to possibly get a chance
of getting into the room.
So you come out of Invisibility with that.
- Oh, wait, I come out of
Invisibility for attacking?
In that case, why don't we just do,
why don't I just cast Shatter on it
if we're gonna come out
of Invisibility anyways?
- That makes the most sense.
- Yeah, okay, yeah.
So I just cast Shatter on it.
- Okay, you cast Shatter,
you hit a f*cking chord on that guitar.
- And then Arthur Aguefort playing
a bass guitar appears in the sky.
- You came back!
Thank goodness you came back, Professor.
I thought you-
- Ayda, Kristen, and Fig
all leap into the room.
As they do, you see those
four guardians rush in
with Kir and your dad right behind them.
- I cast Banishment on Kir.
- We're gonna roll initiative now.
- Okay.
- Do I also have to roll initiative?
- Yes, you do.
- Great.
- 14.
- Woo!
- I also got a 14.
- Also, Ayda, I wanna
Message Ayda and be like,
"It's just me.
It's Fig, okay, don't get-"
- Oh, you turned yourself into her dad?
- I know, I know.
I warned her when we were coming over.
- Yeah.
I was like, hey.
- Hell yeah.
- Did anyone get above a 20?
- No.
- 14.
- Did anyone get above a 15?
- No.
- Did anyone get above a 10?
- 14.
- Both got 14?
- Cool.
Fig, Adaine...
Did anybody get between a five and a 10?
What'd you get?
- I got an eight.
- Eight.
- Hold on.
- I guess I'm announcing
what I'm gonna do.
- Minus three to initiative.
- It's insane.
- It's the worst stat I've ever seen.
You have a four.
- I just start reading my book.
- You have a four?
Four to Dex?
- They have a four to Dexterity.
- They wear flip-flops.
Like, there's no-
- Yeah, yeah, totally, yeah.
- Yeah, that's true.
- Ah, cool.
- So, you losing,
you're like, private.
- You guys have landed in this room.
You see this orb here.
Fig, you are first to act.
- Sweet.
- Well, I'm Arthur
Aguefort, so I'm gonna say,
"This will all be over
if you hand me the girl."
- Go ahead and give me
Intimidation or Persuasion.
- Wouldn't it be, like,
Deception or Performance?
- Actually, yeah, we'll call it-
- Because I'm an actor?
- Well, give me a Deception
to be Arthur Aguefort,
and then it will
be, I guess, Intimidation.
- Deception, I got a...
Wait, hold on.
18.
- 18, awesome.
That's enough to deceive them.
Now, go ahead and give me Intimidation,
just a flat Intimidation.
- 12.
- 12.
You see Kir says,
"You are nothing more than a fool,
and your efforts here
shall have been in vain."
I'm not gonna make you use your whole turn
on that Intimidation.
If you wanna take another action, you can.
- All right, then.
I'm going to Hexblade Curse
Adaine's dad and attack him.
- f*ck, yeah.
- I know this isn't strategic,
but man, f*ck that guy.
- Absolutely go for it.
- Does a 15 hit?
- Does a 15 hit?
A 15 certainly hits, however,
I need you to make a
Wisdom saving throw for me.
- Okay.
- Eight.
- That's your Wisdom saving throw?
- Yeah.
- Awesome!
You see that Angwyn's eyes ripple,
and he says, "Think better
of your hasty action,"
and uses Instinctive Charm,
which means on a failed save,
the attacker targets the
creature closest to it
other than the enchanter or itself.
- Oh, please don't make
me attack Ayda as her dad.
- I'm gonna roll, it's 50-50 between...
I'm gonna say one through three is Ayda,
and a four through six is Kristen.
That's a three.
You attack Ayda Aguefort.
- Oh, no!
- Can I scream?
"It's Fig, it's me, Fig.
Blame me, blame me."
- Oh my God, that's so much damage.
- No, I didn't do that.
I didn't do that, I didn't do that.
- 12.
- 12 damage?
- Yeah.
- Cool, and what was your
actual attack roll again?
- It was 15.
- Okay.
You see Ayda, and you did 12 damage?
- Yeah.
- So you swing at Ayda,
and you see that Ayda
looks at you and says,
"Dad, Dad, I'm sorry-"
- It's me, Fig.
"I'm sorry, Dad, Dad."
- It's me, Fig.
"I'm sorry, I'm sorry, Dad, Dad."
- It's me, Fig, it's your
best friend, I'm so sorry.
- Kir looks at Arthur Aguefort
attack his daughter, and scream,
"I'm your best friend, it's me, Fig."
And Kir says, "I'm getting
very confused and upset
with everything that these children do."
- I hope the vibes are just as
positive for the other guys.
- They must be.
- It's pretty great.
- Adaine, that's gonna be you.
- I mean, can I do anything?
- Oh, I'm gonna Message Aelwyn.
"Aelwyn, get ready, we're
leaving, get ready."
- "Okay."
- Get ready, we're leaving.
- "There's a vault on the first floor."
- Yes.
And she Messages back to
you, she knows to get ready.
That is Adaine's turn.
- And can I ready an
action to cast a spell?
- Yes, you may absolutely ready
an action to cast a spell.
- Great.
- Yeah.
- Are these guardians green plants?
- These guardians are green
plant-like creatures, yes.
Ba, ba, ba.
Okay.
Hold on one second.
Angwyn raises his hand
to cast Dominate Person on you, Fig.
And Ayda knocks it out of the air.
Boom, Counterspell.
- Thank you, from me, Fig.
- "Whatever, I would help you, Fig.
Dad... you're not my dad.
You're Fig, right?
It's an illusion, yes."
- Yes.
- "You're Fig, I know.
Why would I have carried my dad here?
He never carried me."
- Hey, if you wanna work out some stuff,
like when we're not in battle,
I could kind of do this.
- "I might need to work some of that out
while we're in battle,
because you elected to have a disguise
that's very upsetting."
You see...
That's Angwyn's turn. Kristen, that's you.
- Great.
I am going to, what am I gonna do?
You know what?
We're all just in one room, right?
- Yep.
- Okay, I'm gonna cast Spirit Guardians
and try to fill the room with...
- Spirit Guardians.
- People who... Excluding us
two, Ayda, and the sisters.
- Cool, you got it.
- And then I wanna try to see
if I can roll the ball that Adaine's in.
Like a bowling ball at...
At Kir.
- Do you have Dispel Magic?
You can Dispel Magic it away.
- I don't think I have Dispel Magic.
I think arcane, and I
think only Ayda can do it.
- Awesome.
- Yeah, but I have heal, you know.
I can heal you and your sister.
- So you cast Spirit Guardians,
and boom, a bunch of philosophy
grad students appear.
- My guys!
- "Oh, what's up?"
- What is up?
- "Oh, what do we got here?
Some kind of like, oh, it's like a sort of
off-brand like Fae, Elven
kind of, okay, great."
- Oh, we're royal too, oh.
- "What are you guys, aloof
because of the passage of time
or some bullshit?"
- Oh, you guys are just
aloof because you're aloof.
- You see that one of the
Spirit Guardians disappears.
- No!
Whose side are you freaking on?
Look, they're students.
They're philosophy students.
- Yeah, yeah.
- Yeah, they have to work it out now
so they're not annoying adults.
- Yes, hey, do you want a cortado?
- In unison, they all say,
"We would love a cortado."
- Okay, okay.
- Incredible.
- Oh, yeah.
There is an espresso machine
in this prison.
- Can I say, do the Spirit
Guardians get through the orb
or is the orb totally?
- Wow, those are bad rolls!
The Spirit Guardians do
partially go through the orb.
They appear as kind of a radius.
Every one of the green men fails.
Go ahead and roll damage.
- Oh, it's four D8s, I believe.
Can I have a D8 from someone?
- If you're using a
higher level spell slot.
- I am, yeah.
- Cool, go for it.
- Fourth level.
All right, all right, 14, 15, 21.
21 damage on anyone who...
- Is it your modifier, too, or just the?
- Yeah, you're right.
- Yeah, so what would I add to that?
- It's just 21.
- Okay, cool.
- Thank you.
- Thank you.
- Okay, you see two of them
rush up to you, Kristen.
One goes to Fig, one goes to Ayda.
- How do the green men look
after getting hit with 21?
- They're up, but they didn't like that.
You see that as they start moving,
you see that one of the
guardians start yelling out,
"In what way do you
actually defend the forest?
And from what?
Do you have any actual
participation in the systems
that watch ecosystems be destroyed?
Or are you just gonna march around
and do what the elves tell you?"
And the green men kind
of partially disassemble
under the weight of those questions.
- The weight.
- Cool.
- Ooh, one scores a
critical hit on Kristen.
- Oh, Shield.
Do I have a bonus action after... Yeah.
- Well, this would be your reaction.
- Reaction.
- You can use Shield,
but it's a critical hit,
so it's gonna hit no matter what.
- Oh, yeah, of course.
Nine, 14, 15.
You take 19 points of bludgeoning damage.
- Here we go.
- Nice, quiet "Here we go."
- Fig, you take
12 points of damage.
- All right, Hellish Rebuke.
- Go for it.
- On one of those green dudes?
- One of the green dudes, yeah.
- Oh, that's great.
- Cook him.
- Oh, that's gonna be really bad.
Fire damage is probably bad.
- You should just try to get
bumped into by all of them
so that you can Hellish Rebuke.
- So poorly.
That's gonna be a seven.
Seven fire damage.
- Seven fire damage?
That thing hurts.
You know that it's not your
most powerful Hellish Rebuke.
You see it hurts this thing quite a lot.
- Oh, does it now?
Interesting.
- Awesome.
That is the green men's turn
as they swing at you.
That's now gonna be Kir's turn.
Ba-ba-bum.
Oh.
- All right, fine.
- Okay.
- Did you do a cheese thing?
- Wait, did you do it with?
- Yeah, he did it.
- He made it look like
- Are you doing it?
- You want me to?
- I tried to do it, literally,
because I thought you...
- Incredible.
- In this house, we eat dice.
- You need to roll dice.
Pick up cheese as you pretend to eat it.
- So I'm gonna roll...
- You do this thing where
you shake your whole head.
- I'm gonna need Wisdom saves.
- Where the hell did that go?
- From Kristen,
Fig, and Ayda.
- Ooh, I need this to go well!
- 14.
- Okay.
- Nat 20.
Go f*ck yourself, Kir.
- You see that Kir looks at you and says,
"Leave this place at once."
You are unaffected, it looks
like Ayda's unaffected.
Fig is affected by the spell.
- k*ll me.
- Ayda is next in the initiative.
Ayda looks at you, hold on one second,
and on a roll of a natural 19,
dispels the Suggestion on you.
She looks and says, "Dad, don't leave!
Ah, I mean, stop, stop, stop!
Fig, don't leave!
Fig, don't leave!"
- Hey, call me whenever you want,
if you're gonna dispel me.
- This fight...
- That is Ayda's turn.
Fig, that is gonna be you.
- Okay, I'm gonna go over
to the green guardians
and put my bass aside and
then Burning Hands them.
- Hell yeah.
Go for it, roll damage.
- Rolled terribly again!
That is going to be a whopping six.
- Okay.
- But it's a 15-foot cone.
- 15-foot cone.
You can hit all of them in that for sure.
It's a Dex save for half.
Hold on one second here.
- I can't do it at higher levels,
and it's a specialized thing.
- Okay.
Two of them save, two do not,
and how much damage did you do again?
- Six.
- Six, okay.
That's gonna be.
- You can't because it's not that good?
- I can't because it's part of my,
it's part of my pick.
- Gotcha.
That's cool.
- Yes, two, it's a lot of damage
across all four of them though,
as you light them up with fire.
Adaine, that's gonna be you.
- There's really not very much I can do,
because there's no spells that can get
through the orb, right?
But Boggy can turn into a mist
and then back again?
- That's correct.
- So can I
send Boggy to help Fig
on these Wisdom rolls?
- Yes, you absolutely can.
- Great.
- You send Boggy.
Boggy rushes out.
- Can Adaine Counterspell
from in there, or?
- I don't have any spells left.
I only have three first-level spells left.
- That is going to be,
Angwyn is going to go again.
He is now going to hit Kristen
with a Dominate Person.
I'm gonna need a Wisdom
saving throw from Kristen.
- Okay.
Interesting.
So 14.
- 14, that is exactly Angwyn's DC.
You succeed.
- Yes.
- You see he says,
"Come under my control."
- Did you say something?
- What are you reading?
- "On the Book of World Religions."
- That is Angwyn's turn,
Kristen, that's you.
- Okay, great.
I'm going to,
maybe can I just prepare
a Cure Wounds action
for when we get these bubbles open?
- Oh, to Cure Wounds on Adaine?
- I actually don't need Cure Wounds.
My problem is really I
don't have spells left.
- The main issue is this orb as well.
I don't know if Kristen
has Dispel Magic prepared.
- I don't have Dispel Magic, yeah.
- But the main issue is the orb.
- Okay, well then I
guess I'll just keep...
I'm gonna cast...
Okay, yeah, I'm gonna
cast Blindness on Kir.
- Cool, is that a concentration spell?
- Nope.
- You have the teddy bear.
- Oh, you have the teddy
bear, that's right.
- Okay, Blindness, awesome.
Hold on one second.
- You choose a creature
you see within range.
They make a Con saving throw.
- Okay, she's gotta
make a Con saving throw.
- How high is that wizard's
Constitution, Brennan?
- Not extremely high, I won't lie.
But on a natural 17, she
does overcome the Blindness.
- Oh, sorry, on a higher
levels of third or more,
you can cast it on an additional creature.
Can I do that and also cast it
on Angwyn as well?
- And target Angwyn as well?
- Yeah, yeah.
- Absolutely.
Do your Spirit Guardians
hit people this round?
- They hit at the beginning
of their turn.
- Yes, they hit
at the beginning of
their turn every round.
You see that Angwyn is- Light blasts
out of your crooked staff and,
he is completely unable to see.
- Awesome.
- Now that's going to
be the green men again.
At the beginning of their turn,
they all make saves from
the Spirit Guardians.
Two save, another two do not.
Go ahead and roll damage.
- All right.
Give it up. Thank you.
- 19.
- 19, okay.
So that's going to be...
- When I do that, is
that 19 points of damage
to each of them?
- Yeah.
- Oh, awesome.
- Six.
Your philosophy grad students
just again start heckling
and be like, "What's your whole deal?
Why do you exist?
Rebel against the
conditions of your creation.
You clearly have sapience, right?"
- Have you seen "Memento"?
- "We love 'Memento'!"
- That was crazy, right?
- Complete in uniform sip
from all their cortados.
You see that Kir is now going to act.
- This song is so similar
to a different song.
I was like...
- Yeah, here we go!
- Okay.
- It's supposed to be,
it's like one degree off.
But it's not that song.
- All right.
- Lawyer's watch this show.
- Zac frickin' loves pop punk.
- Our big two are CEOs and lawyers.
- I'm gonna need a Charisma
saving throw from Kristen.
- All right.
It's okay, my Charisma...
- 17.
- 17 passes.
Kir attempts to Banish you
and you are not banished from this realm.
- Uh-uh-oh!
- Uh-oh!
- Ayda rushes forward, hits
the orb with Dispel Magic
and dispels it.
- Yes!
- Yes!
- You see she rushes up,
grabs your hands, Adaine,
and says, "I heard you were
kidnapped, so I came to help."
- Thank you.
My sister is also kidnapped.
Can you, can you, can you do the...
- "Great, where is she?"
- I guess we...
- "Where is she on the earth?
Can we teleport there?"
- No, she's like in the next room.
- "Extremely convenient."
And you see that she begins to rush
out of the, rush out of the door.
- And I have my spell prepared, right?
- Yes, you do.
- How many of these green guys are left?
- All four are still up,
but they're all looking badly injured.
- Okay.
In which case, I guess I'll
just Firebolt one of them.
Wait, yeah.
- Hell yeah.
- Yeah, might as well.
- Nice.
- Are you going after
the most injured one?
- Yeah.
- Cool.
- Well, it's two D10 damage,
so actually, no, I should go
after a different one, right?
- Well, it's gonna be two D10
and they're vulnerable to fire damage.
- Right, exactly.
- Up to you.
They're all kind of looking about
as injured as each other.
- Oh, okay.
Then I'll k*ll the one closest to me,
whatever that is.
- Cool, go for it.
- That's a 15 to hit?
- 15.
- Oh no, 17, sorry.
- A 17 to hit?
- Yeah.
17 exactly hits.
- Great.
That's 10 damage.
- 10 damage.
You light one of these dudes up.
- Great.
- In a big blast of flame.
That's your readied action,
so that's your reaction.
- Great.
And then can I slap my dad in the face?
- Well, he can't see it coming,
so free Dad slap.
- Great.
- Free Dad slap.
- You know, this is a
little dad-centric episode.
- Fig.
- Hi, Dad.
- That is going to be your turn.
- That's me.
Okay.
- Number three, dads.
- I guess I'm just going to,
I don't have any more fire spells.
I'm going to...
I'm gonna, I guess I'm just
going to Shatter these.
I'm going to try and Shatter as many
of these green guys as I can.
- Okay, awesome.
No worries.
Go for it.
- Yeah.
- Sorry, guys.
- So they do, they do a Con save.
- Okay.
- Or they take, let's see...
21.
21 damage.
Half that for anyone who saves.
- Okay.
- If a creature made
of inorganic material,
such as stone, crystal, or metal,
has disadvantage on the saving throw.
- Okay.
These guys are not made of
stone, crystal, or metal.
- Okay.
- Hit this power chord.
Again, Arthur Aguefort just rocking out
in the middle of this room.
These guys are looking
messed up, for sure.
Oh, I also believe,
I may have actually skipped
these guys attacking you.
So we're gonna go back and
resolve that, I'm afraid.
- I took 19 from something.
- That was their first round.
That was their first round.
That, and what is Kristen's AC?
That's a hit.
You take 11 points of damage
as one of them strikes you.
- One.
Two are going for Fig and hit.
- Shield.
- One is converted into a miss.
- You take 11 points of damage as well.
As these huge, powerful
wooden fists rain down on you.
That is Fig.
Adaine, it's actually back to your turn.
- Great.
I guess what I'm gonna do is,
Kir's still here, right?
- Correct.
- I am going to...
- Kir's the worst.
- Chromatic Orb, poison attack her.
- Awesome.
- That's a 17 to hit?
- 17 hits.
- Great.
And that's 10 damage again, g*dd*mn.
- To Kir, awesome.
- To Kir, yeah.
10 poison damage.
That by, yeah, poison is
a rare kind of damage.
- She vomits as poison
courses through her veins.
She says, "I don't understand
why you have to be so difficult.
Oh, very classy."
- Hey, Adaine, what do you
wanna do about your dad?
Because, I mean.
- I mean, I want him to die.
- Okay, then we'll try to k*ll him.
- Great, okay.
- Cool.
- Oh, hey, it's me, Fig.
- Oh!
- Yeah!
- That tracks, actually.
That tracks.
- Angwyn dispels the Blindness on himself.
- Can you dispel something
that you can't see?
- He knows where he is.
- Okay, okay.
- Let me actually double check
and make sure that
Blindness is not an instant-
Do you have the Blindness card there
in front of you, Kristen?
- I certainly do.
- Is the duration instantaneous on it?
Is it a thing where it
creates a permanent effect?
Let me go ahead and see.
- No, on a success the spell ends.
- Let me go ahead and take a
look at the card real quick.
Also, Spirit Guardians, I forgot,
halves, anyone who takes damage from it,
their, their speed.
- Oh, okay, he actually
keeps making the Con save.
Well, he's not gonna wait
around for that Con save.
He's gonna dispel that.
Angwyn looks at the badly hurt green men
and at Kir here as well.
Angwyn...
- Tries to run?
- Turns invisible.
- Oh!
- b*tch.
- Kristen, that is your turn.
- Okay, there's a lot of like commotion
and Kir's throwing up, right?
- Yes, correct.
- Okay, I would like to appear behind her
and I would like to
put my hand on her back
and say, "You're on the wrong side,
but you could join us if you want,"
and then cast Banishment.
- Ha ha ha!
- Oh my god.
- Just to give her time
to think, you know,
kind of out of this.
We'll bring her back.
- Okay.
- I like the part where
you disappear and reappear.
- Ha ha ha!
- Hey.
- Slowly.
- Just something to think about.
- I think that is gonna
break your Spirit Guardians.
- No, cause I have teddy bear.
- Oh. Yeah.
- Two concentrations.
- Okay.
- Okay, now we're gonna go
ahead and see about this.
- Jesus Christ.
- So the next,
so Kir's got one shot at this.
It's a Charisma saving throw.
- She doesn't seem very charismatic to me.
- Yeah.
- She's actually got
a hit, a 16 or higher,
in the Box of Doom.
- Wow.
- Right now.
No way. No way.
Spring break.
- Spring break!
- On a Nat one!
She's a gone, baby!
- Bye, friend.
- Bye.
- I kiss her on the side of the head.
See ya.
- Bye.
See, she says,
"oh, you're so-
ha, ah!" Boom!
And you see that, yeah.
- Ta, ta.
- All of your philosophy
grads raise their cortados,
and they're like, "Kristen!"
- Guys, guys.
Let's hang out after this, right?
- Next is gonna be the green men,
who once again are gonna make their saves.
God, the highest roll was a five!
Go ahead and roll your damage.
- Hell yes.
All right, come on, let's get a good one.
- Kid's k*lling it today.
- All right.
17.
- 17?
Okay.
One of the badly hurt green men
that's got hit by that Shatter
and the Burning Hands before,
you see your grad student walks up
and just goes again like,
"So again, you do have a mind,
but it's made of magic,
but you follow orders...
What does the plant motif have to do
with imprisoning these children?
I just don't-"
and you see the green man
just says, "Forget it!"
And unravels, to just like get
away from the grad student.
And it's unmade.
And that was, what, you said 17 damage?
- 17.
- Okay.
So that's gonna be seven.
84.
These guys are looking messed up.
Kir is fully Banished.
Ayda runs in from the other room
holding Aelwyn in her arms.
- Nice.
- Let's get out of here.
- No, I need my spellbook.
And her spellbook.
They're on the first floor.
- They're on the first floor?
- I can't do anything if
I don't have my spellbook.
- Can we start Messaging?
Because we don't know where your dad is.
- Yeah, sure, yeah.
We can do this together
- Fig, that is gonna be your turn next.
- All right.
Can I-
- Always hiding from daddy.
- I wanna try to reach out and touch.
- Daddy can't hear.
- Can I use Bestow Curse
to try and make him un-invisible?
Because it says that you can remove,
it says like at the DM's option
you may choose an
alternative curse effect.
So I wanna try and reach out and touch him
and make him un-invisible.
- What I'm gonna need from you
is a Perception check with disadvantage.
And you're trying to spot,
because you're trying to-
I would let the spell do something cool,
but you gotta know where the guy is.
- All right, I can't do that.
- But can Boggy give her the help action?
- Okay.
I still have a plus two to Perception,
so it's not really worth it.
If I just try to attack him,
would I just attack with disadvantage?
- You don't know where you're attacking.
He's gone invisible.
- You might have run too, he had movement.
- What about if Kristen
tries to just hit it
with her staff again and rolls-
- I will also point out that
you do have these big green men
that are raining blows down.
- All right, I'll just do
one more Shatter on them.
- Okay.
- Oh, I rolled three ones.
- Oh my God!
- No!
- Oh, no!
- I have rolled one, one, one.
One, two, three.
All right.
Take three damage, b*tch.
- Brutal...
- Hey, do you want me to
get you a cup of water?
- Yeah, you can dip 'em in a cup of water,
and then you can quit your spell class.
- Adaine, that is you.
- I am going to...
I actually have good Perception.
- Yeah.
- So can I grab Boggy back
and try and find my dad?
- Yes, you can.
- Great.
- Go ahead and give me a Perception check.
- Just regular flat?
- Regular flat.
- Ooh, baby, that's a 23.
- You hear a pitter-patter of
feet running down the hallway.
- Can I sh**t a firebolt down the hallway?
- Yes, you can.
Because you got that Perception check,
I will let you make the
attack on the correct square.
You're still rolling with disadvantage
because you're effectively blinded.
You can't see.
- Great.
- Nine.
- Firebolt shoots down the hallway.
You see a little scrap of burning robe
come out from Invisibility
as the steps make their
way down the stairs.
That's Adaine's turn.
- But if you, if you-
- Can I do-
Oh, sorry.
- Oh, it's actually Angwyn's
turn next in the initiative,
and he flees down the staircase.
- Can I do a Perception check
to make sure he's not going to the vault
where the spellbooks are?
- At this point,
Adaine had to follow him
out into the hallway.
- Oh, got it. Okay.
- Wait, so I...
- It is your turn now.
- He was too far away, sorry,
when I shot him and I saw
that piece of burning robe
for me to run after him and
jump on his back, right?
- Well, you'd already taken your action
to take the attack.
- Right.
- Right.
- I run out there.
- Okay.
- And-
- He went that way, he
went down the stairs.
- Can I do a Perception check to see
if he's going to this vault
that we need to go to next?
- What's that, sorry?
- Can I see if he's going to the vault
to steal the spellbooks?
- Well, you know that
he's running downstairs.
The tower is small enough
that there's not too many...
It's not like the tower has
tons of hallways and rooms.
It's kind of like each level is...
- Okay, I have a crazy idea.
- Let's hear it.
- Okay, I still have my ribbon dancer.
We all know that's true.
I whip it and I fly down.
Instead of taking the
stairs down this tower,
I fall majestically down with the ribbon.
- With your minus three Dex.
- Wait, you're just gonna jump
out the window of the tower?
- No, no, down into the middle, right?
Where the courtyard is?
Just try to whip one or two, you know?
- Great, so this is beautiful.
I'm gonna allow this to happen.
Hey, Ally, I'm gonna allow this to happen.
- You don't want this to happen.
- This is such a bad idea.
- So what's gonna happen is this,
the skill that feels most like doing
a beautiful ribbon dance
to me is Acrobatics.
- You're just gonna look really good
while you crumple on the ground.
- So just go ahead in the Box
of Doom, if you'd be so kind,
and just give me an Acrobatics check.
- Ally-
- My Acrobatics is negative three.
- No, no, no, no, no, no, no,
no, no, no, oh, no, no, no.
We like to ask Brennan for cool things.
- Jump, jump,
jump, jump, jump, jump,
jump, jump, jump, jump.
- It's going to feel so good.
- That's a 17.
Hey, minus three is a 14.
- 14.
- So you leap out the window.
Now, I want, Ally, I
want you to look at me
and you tell me, do you feel like a 14
is a high enough roll for your character
to be able to use a dance ribbon to fly?
Bearing in mind that if I say yes,
that if I say yes now, I have to say yes
every other time you want to do this.
- Yeah, definitely.
I think, you know, 14, it's above average.
- Don't pay any attention to this noise.
- You guys just see
the most insane things.
See Kristen just go like this.
- I'm not trying to like fly.
- Sure, you're trying to descend.
- I'm just trying, I'm trying to grapple.
It's like a grappling hook.
- It's 10 stories.
- Is it 10 stories?
- 10 stories.
- I'm just trying to grapple.
I'm trying to grapple three flights down
so that I can cut off her dad...
- Yeah, that kind of precision.
- Okay, cool.
So you're just going to try to nail this.
You're going to try to
cap this graceful fall
at 10 stories.
- No, do you understand, like,
I'm jumping with the
ribbon dancer like this,
you know, to fly.
- Sure, cool.
- You know, I don't
know if you understand.
It's like to fly.
- Okay, so yeah, you're
just going to try to go
a quick three stories
down using a ribbon dance
to do that.
An ability, nowhere on
your character sheet.
- The ribbon dancer is
written on my character sheet.
- You have four Dexterity.
- So, here's the thing.
I'm going to allow you to avert this,
because I don't want anyone to say
that I was cruel or mean or unfair, right?
So all I'm gonna ask is this:
Hit a 15 Acrobatics
check for me right now.
- Another one?
- Yeah, to just, to like Indiana Jones
using a ribbon as a bullwhip.
- Yeah.
See, you let Indiana Jones
do it, and that's sexist.
No one respects femininity
in this country.
- You Ally'd
out of the Box of Doom,
across my lap.
Okay, that's a natural two.
- Interesting.
- So that's a negative one.
- I didn't really thought
this was going to be one
of those crazy Ally moments.
- I didn't want to say it.
- We don't know what the
first one landed on though.
- That's true.
The first one is canon.
- Here's your die back.
- Thank you.
- What happens is this.
Kristen, you were like,
you were like, I have got to get
to the first floor before Angwyn.
- Here we go.
- I have great news.
You make it to the first floor
way before Angwyn does, right?
And the reason for that is-
- Why is that?
- 16, 23, you take-
- Can we say the ribbon wraps around me,
makes sort of a cushion.
- Cool.
- Here's what we are going to say.
Kristen, to get to the first floor,
you take your ribbon,
twirl, leap out the window
and take 36 points of damage.
- As you-
- Absolutely worthless.
- As you-
- Hell yeah.
- Ah! Ah! Ah!
And you f*cking land on your leg
and roll and snap your ankle.
- All right, I do have three points left.
- Can you bonus action heal yourself?
- Yeah, I would like to
bonus action heal myself.
- Give yourself a Healing Word.
- Love it.
- Ooh, I was stress eating
celery in that moment.
That was crazy.
- It's so funny how often
you try to jump on things
with the worst Dex I have ever seen.
- I have a ribbon dancer, okay?
- Right.
No, for sure, absolutely.
- Some of us are getting more
into dance in this episode.
- You just wouldn't understand.
- How dare you?
How dare you?
- I worked out really great for you.
- I saw you do it and I was like, go off.
- What's his Dex?
- Your modifier is
bigger than their total.
- It's true.
My modifier is five,
which is more than their
full attribute stats.
- That's so funny.
- Oh, that makes me laugh a lot.
- It's the lowest score I've ever seen.
- How do you even roll a four?
- I can't believe you didn't.
- Because you rolled five dice
and take the three highest ones.
- So here's the thing.
I'm just gonna say that's
Kristen's movement.
I'm going to say that you
leap out of the window,
fall 100 feet.
- Fall 100 feet?
- Or let me see, yeah, about 100 feet.
Hit the ground, take that damage,
but you have an action
left if you would like it.
- Great, I'm gonna cast Zone of Truth.
- Oh my God.
- What?
On an invisible man?
I'm going to cast Zone of Truth
right outside of the vault
while I lay there not
really able to do very much.
Just in case we catch him,
then we can ask him questions,
we can figure out what to do.
- Got a badly broken leg,
you cast Zone of Truth.
- Not going to heal yourself.
- No, I did, I did a healing.
- Healing Word, yeah.
- Yeah, they're at nine, don't worry.
- Oh wait, actually I get
bonus points plus that heal.
- Okay.
- He knows he's a bad guy.
- These guys are going
to take some swings.
- We don't know.
Maybe they know more
about the Nightmare King.
- I'm pretty sure he's
just going to get away.
- You get hit for 11 points of damage
from one of the green men.
Adaine, you're gonna get
hit for some as well.
- Ooh.
- Shield, does that?
- Okay, one of them is bypassed.
A critical hit still hits
you for eight, seven, 15.
For 18 points of damage,
one, boom, wallops you.
That is going to be, Kir's still Banished.
Oh, actually, I'm going to need Kristen
to make a Concentration check.
- Oh for...
- Because you took, what,
36 points of damage?
So that's halved to 18.
So you've got to get an 18
Constitution saving throw.
- So you got to get 16 or higher.
- Okay.
- 17 or higher.
- Oh, 10.
- Kir returns into the room
when you hit the bottom of the courtyard.
As she does-
- Wait, but was the teddy bear
the one focusing on that one?
- Yeah. What's the teddy bear's stats?
- If the teddy bear was
concentrating on it.
- Yeah, I feel like that teddy
bear has a plus five because-
- I'm going to roll luck
check in the Box of Doom.
One through 10, it was the
bear that takes no damage.
11 through 20, it was Kristen.
It's a 15, it was Kristen.
- Oh, damn it.
Do I look good down here?
Do I look intimidating to f*cking Kir?
- Hey, and there's a Zone of
Truth, so we can't lie, so.
- We're definitely there.
- You look great.
- I'll take some pictures in
case you want to use them.
- Spring break!
- At the end, a 10 stories down,
you take a little grainy photo of me.
- And in the foreground
is the ribbon dancer,
which did successfully
grab onto the neck of it.
- It's still falling.
- Yeah.
- There's a cat filter on your face.
- I take a Boomerang,
it's really, really...
- Okay.
- I'm glad we came in here with the plans,
just like the guys.
- Oh my God.
- Oh, you're rolling too many dice,
back there, man.
- No, no, no, no.
- Adaine, you take-
- I still have Shield up, is that?
Oh, this is from the crit?
- No, this hits regardless.
You take nine points of fire damage.
- Okay.
- Fig, you take-
- I took 11.
- From the green man.
- Oh, this is from someone else.
- This is from Kir, who's back.
- Dang, Kir.
- You take 17 points of
fire damage halved to eight.
- Oh, right.
And then Ayda gets some fire damage,
which she is fully immune to.
As Kir just lights you guys up
with a bunch of rays of flame.
- Dare you do that to Arthur Aguefort?
You see Ayda goes, "Please stop that!"
- I know, but see, it's intimidating.
- "It can't possibly be helping us
more than it's hurting us."
- Does Aelwyn have cantrips?
Is she, how's she doing?
- Aelwyn's looking comatose.
- Oh, okay.
- She's looking sort of-
- So you're saying that she
doesn't have any Ray of Frost
that she can just pull out of her-
- Does not look like it.
- All right, well, you know, worth a go.
I Message her, "Wake up, you b*tch!"
- Ayda is gonna go ahead
and hit Kir with something.
Kir's gonna make another
Charisma saving throw.
Kir, once again, has to hit
a 16 or higher Box of Doom.
- Ain't gonna happen on spring break.
- No way.
- Spring break!
- That's a natural three.
- It simply can't happen on spring break.
- You see that Ayda walks over and says,
"My friend Kristen did this.
Mwah!"
And gives a kiss.
Sort of loudly pronouncing "mwah."
And Kir goes, "Not again!"
and vanishes into a Banishment spell.
- Yes, I wasn't there, but yes.
- Fig, that is back to your turn.
- Okay, Adaine, do you
wanna get to that spellbook
before your dad does?
- Oh yeah, I do.
- Describe the room to me.
- It's a vault and it's
on the first floor.
- I grab her by the shoulders
and then Dimension Door down.
- Hell, yeah.
- Into this vault.
- You, Dimension Door.
Boom.
The normal protections that
would safeguard the vault
against these sorts of intrusions
have been unmade by your
party members abroad
at the elemental pylons.
- Spring break!
- Spring jailbreak.
- Do I hear them arrive?
Can I be like, "I'm out here."
- Oh, but I still have my movement, right?
- Yes, you do.
- So I wanna run to the door leaving
so that I can try and
prevent the invisible man
from getting out.
So I wanna occupy that door.
- You've made it down here definitely
before Angwyn is down here.
- Yeah.
Oh, in fact, I wanna
go and hold my leg out
for the stairs.
- Okay, well you see there's
a big locked vault door
that hasn't been opened yet
because no one's arrived here to open it.
- Oh, sorry, I thought
we went into that vault.
- Yeah, that's what I'm saying.
You guys are teleported into the vault.
There's the inside of the big locked door.
That's where Angwyn's gonna
come from if he comes here.
- Oh, okay.
- You're in a dark room that is, you know,
you've teleported into.
- Okay, then I wanna,
can I like do like a
Stealth check or something
to trip him when he runs in?
- Yeah, you can prepare
an action to attack him
when he runs in.
Absolutely.
- He might not be coming
to get the spellbooks.
- Adaine, that's gonna be you.
- Can I, with Boggy
giving me the help action,
search this vault?
- Go ahead and give me either
Investigation or Arcana.
- Great.
Well, I rolled a three and a two.
- Oh, no!
- So I got a 10.
- Okay.
- Right now, it's pitch black in here.
And even with your dark,
even with Elven darkvision,
it's hard for you to see... without light,
it's hard to see what
would have magical auras
and what would be otherwise-
- Okay, is there even at least like,
I realize as a high elf,
I actually have proficiency
in swords and daggers.
I don't have any spells left.
- Yeah.
- I have one first-level spell left,
but are there weapons that I can grab?
- Absolutely.
You wanna just grab a weapon?
- Yeah.
- You reach out,
there's a random sword hanging
on a wall or something.
As you pull it, you go, shing!
And the vault fills with
gleaming green-golden light
as this long, whip-thin Elven sword
springs to life in your hand.
And the voices of your ancestors cry,
"Fandrangor, sword of the Elven kings,
forged in ages long past."
- Are you gonna do this
every time I draw you?
- "Every time."
- Great, can you help
me find my spellbook?
- "I don't have eyes."
- Okay, well, you're at
least light in the darkness.
- "Mostly we prefer to
be used for fighting."
- Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes,
right, yes, obviously, yes.
- You just have this big glow-stick sword.
You feel its ego extremely injured.
- You're being very useful right now.
- "Useful is sort of not-"
- Very dangerously useful.
- "Okay."
- You should meet my Investigate spell.
I feel like you'd get on very well.
- "All right, ha ha."
Incredible.
Fig, the vault door opens and-
- Wait, if I'm out there, can I,
do I get an attack of opportunity?
- You don't see anything approaching.
But you do see the wheels start to spin.
- Hey!
- But, there was just, the door opens.
- What's your favorite color?
- The door opens.
Go ahead and take your attack
roll with disadvantage.
- With disadvantage, okay.
Woo!
- Nat one.
- Oh no!
- How many ones have
I rolled this session?
- Oh, I'm so sorry.
So you take a swing,
but you do hear a yelp from Angwyn
as he rushes into the vault.
It's like, "Huh!"
- I found him!
I found him!
Everyone attack!
- Kristen, that's you
outside on the courtyard.
- Okay.
I would like to,
well, first I'm gonna cast
a little Mass Healing Word
on myself.
Okay.
- Ooh, are we within 60 feet of Kristen?
- You are.
If you wanna hit Fig with
that as well, you can.
- Yup, you all just got 12,
and you don't get anything
in addition, but I do.
Okay.
I am going to,
are my Spirit Guardians,
do they follow me down?
- They do, yeah, absolutely.
- Okay, so, would he
have passed through them?
- Ooh, that is a great point.
He's gonna roll.
He rolls a natural one.
Go ahead and roll damage,
if you'd be so kind.
- Love it.
I get, oh, one more.
- One more, D8?
Yeah, go for it.
- Oh, here it is, sorry.
Okay, that's 7, 14...
- Ha-cha-cha.
22.
- Ooh!
- That's right, baby.
- You see that your grad
students are confused,
so they don't know who they're yelling at,
so they just go like,
"Hey, f*ck this invisible guy!
f*ck this guy!"
And he runs by, opens the door,
and then springs out into this room
where he gets swung at by a bass guitar.
- Cool, then I'm just gonna use my turn
to help try to find the spellbooks.
- So you cast the bonus action.
Your Spirit Guardians do the thing.
Go ahead...
Do you want to give,
do you want to take
Investigation or Arcana?
You could also do a Religion check.
- Yeah, Religion would be great,
because I get advantage on that.
- Go for it.
- I'll also bonus action
Bardic Inspiration you.
- Woo!
That was Religion.
Yeah, 21.
- You go over and find
a massive religious tome
packed with notes over in
a section of the vault.
- Okay, cool, I grab that,
and then I do kind of like a,
like I wrap my body around it
in a ball on the ground
so no one can take it.
- Cool, you just huddle around.
- Because he's still invisible, right?
- Yeah, absolutely.
- Wait, when you get hit
when you're invisible?
- Does he have to do
a concentration check?
- Oh, Angwyn?
Oh, he took damage, he
does have to do that.
- 11, right?
Because it's 22?
- 22 points of damage.
- Get him, Murph.
- Yeah.
- Get him.
- We'll do it Box of Doom style.
He's got to roll an 11 or higher.
That's a natural three.
- I'm gonna need you to
re-roll your attack roll,
because he's not invisible
when he comes into the vault.
- Does a
15 hit?
- 15 exactly hits.
- Yes!
Psychic Blades, I'm
adding my Psychic Blades.
- It's spring break,
baby, it's spring break.
- Good bit of rules lawyering.
- 11.
- I love to see it.
- I love to see it.
- 27 damage, b*tch.
- So you see he comes in,
your grad students grab
the spell off of him.
He swings the vault and says,
"You are a horrible, nasty little human."
Bang!
Like El Kabong, just
bass guitar to the head.
His teeth fly out of his mouth
and he is unconscious on the ground.
- You're a worse fighter
than you are a father.
Oh, you couldn't hear that.
- Can I drag him into the Zone of Truth?
- ... then k*ll him again.
- What's this?
- Can I drag him into the Zone of Truth
while they're finding the other book?
- Yes, you drag him in.
- Okay, I hand the book to Adaine
and I drag him into the Zone of Truth.
- Can I actually close this vault
so we can trap him in here
so he doesn't do some trick?
- Wait, no, my spellbook
is still in there.
- Yeah, yeah, so..
- You guys hear an enormous expl*si*n
from up in the top of the tower.
And you hear Ayda call down and say,
"I destroyed the green men, the last ones.
They were still up here.
More bad guys.
I don't know if that was a priority."
- You did great, thank you.
- "Thank you very much
for your compliment.
It means a lot."
- Come on down and hang.
- Come on down
to the Zone of Truth.
- Bring my sister, please.
- Oh, right.
- Incredible.
We are out of combat.
- Amazing.
- Can I?
Okay.
- You guys see, however,
as you guys are down here,
that, hold on one second,
as you guys rush in,
Ayda swoops down on you guys and says,
"We have less than a minute
left before Kir returns."
- I'm gonna use that minute
to look for something
about gems in this special vault.
- I'm gonna let all of you
guys make one last roll
for the vault.
Tell me the skill you're using,
because Ayda is getting ready
to Invisibilize everybody
and get the hell out.
- Cool, cool, cool.
- Is her sister there, too?
- Yes, Ayda's holding
your sister in her arms.
- I'm gonna use an Arcana
check with Boggy to help me.
- Absolutely.
Go ahead and make your Arcana check.
- Okay, that's a Nat 20.
- Yay!
- Woo!
- Baby!
- Okay. All right.
- You find, cordoned off, using
the light from Fandrangor,
you find a quarantined
series of Elven scroll cases
that is labeled, basically,
"Top secret, Classified, Confidential."
This is the research of Arianwen Abernant.
You found your mom's research.
- And my spellbook and Aelwyn's spellbook?
- Your spellbook and
Aelwyn's spellbook, yes.
- Great, cool, thank you.
- I would like to use Religion,
and I'm looking for anything
Nightmare King-related,
if there's anything like that.
- Go for it.
- Oh, that one's c*ck.
Okay.
17?
- 17.
As Adaine is going
through her mom's stuff,
you find a series of notes,
looking for the location
of a temple within Sylvaire
that Arianwen was looking for.
And you see it and immediately know
that Arianwen might not
have known where this was,
but you do.
The book that you and Riz found
in the Compass Points library.
- Cool.
- And let me get one from
Fig as well, if you want.
- Okay, I'm gonna do a Persuasion check.
- Hell, yeah.
- And I'm gonna play a really sick riff
that makes all the gems dance.
And just try and suss out any sort of gem.
- What?
- I don't have any other good skills!
This is what I do, and it's all that I do!
- You're gonna do a gem dance?
- The gems are gonna dance
and reveal themselves.
- Okay, awesome.
- I jumped out the window,
I can't laugh at you.
- Give me a Performance check.
- Okay.
Performance or Persuasion?
- I can do Performance if you do that.
- Do Performance.
- You're trying to persuade some gems.
- Okay, 19!
- Cool.
You hit a tasty chord,
and you see that there's a large gem
built into the base of Calethriel Tower.
You go,
The gem cracks, and you see
the tower begins to collapse.
- Everybody run!
- Ayda goes, "I think it's time to leave!"
And she grabs you guys.
- I grab a shard.
- Actually, I will say this.
You do see something here in the vault,
specifically about gem lore,
also in the section of Arianwen's research
that Adaine was going through.
So you grab another thing
having to do with gems,
and you guys peace the f*ck out.
Ayda Invisibilizes everybody.
- Couldn't have gone better.
- You just hobbling away.
- Couldn't have gone better.
- You helped, you helped.
- Good thing that me and my girlfriend
have such good terms,
she can nurse me back to health.
- Wait, did you and Tracker fight?
- We got in a little skirmish.
- You guys.
- We got a little, we got a little.
- You guys race out.
I'm gonna say that as you guys
all leave from this place,
you guys reconvene in the
forest around the Hangvan.
The three Spring Break boys
from the forge rush back into the van
as the group flies in from the far ridge,
and the group that was
hitting Calethriel Tower
appears at the van.
You see Ayda looks at everybody and says,
"All right, what was the plan?
Now what do we do?"
- Do we have the hirelings?
- Yes, the hirelings have all come back.
- We have Adaine's dad, right?
- If you guys want to, you
can, or you can have left him.
- I want to bring him.
I want him to-
Do you think he casts Plane Shift?
- You think you can make
him cast Plane Shift?
I don't think so.
- Remember how horrible
he is to work with?
- He sucks.
I want him to die.
- Well then why don't we just k*ll him?
- Let's k*ll him.
- I don't know about k*lling her dad.
- I'm going to say this.
I don't, with the tower
collapsing around you,
I don't know that you guys
would have had any more time.
- Great, so we just leave
him under the rubble?
- I think you just leave
him under the rubble.
- Works for me.
- Ah, wait, I must have some kind of re-
Ah, no, I don't think I
have anything I can do.
- I stab him as we leave him.
- You guys were putting
your focus primarily
on getting your sh*t out of the vault.
- Wait, ah, f*ck, I should
have just k*lled your dad.
- I don't know that we
got to k*ll people's dads.
- I'm saying yes.
- Yeah, that's why I asked
Adaine to begin with.
- I'm in the camp, too.
- Ayda says, "I don't
mean to shout or be rude,
but it's very important that
we do something quickly."
- I at least take a pack
of clove cigarettes,
light it on fire, and throw it behind me
to hopefully increase the damage to him.
- Just from the carcinogens
in those cloves?
- No, because it would maybe
be like starting a fire.
- Oh, actually she's starting a fire.
- Light the whole pack.
- Light the whole pack.
- She started like a
- All my philosophy majors
were like, "Oh, oh, hell yeah."
- All right, well,
we just fought a bunch of fire elementals.
Does anybody have any clues
as to where we should go next?
Because we should teleport there.
- We should teleport the f*ck out of here.
- Sylvaire.
- Sylvaire.
- We need to get back to the van.
- We teleport to Sylvaire.
- Ayda says, "I don't
know anywhere in Sylvaire
to teleport to.
I can either take us back to Leviathan,
or we could go back to Kei Lumennura
under Fabian's grandfather's protection."
- Let's do that.
- Are we going, yes, to Kei Lumennura.
- Ayda
fire and phoenix feathers...
You guys arrive in Kei Lumennura.
You see that, Fabian, your
grandfather, Telemaine,
looks at you and says, "My grandson."
- Grandfather.
- "Something has changed in you."
- I left my jacket.
No!
- Did you?
You don't, because all
your gear was there,
your spellbook.
- Oh, I got my jacket.
- Yeah, all of it was
in the same quarantined.
- Okay, okay, good.
- You got your jacket, you got your sh*t.
It would be, yeah, they wouldn't,
they were not so paranoid
that they would be like.
- I take my anxiety medication.
- You know, it'd be like, yeah.
Yeah, you take your anxiety meds.
Cool.
All of you are here in the
gardens of Kei Lumennura.
You look around and are seeing
this for the first time,
Adaine.
- This is beautiful.
- Adaine.
- It's actually good
to have you back.
- What are these grapes?
- We support you.
- Don't eat the grapes!
- Don't eat the grapes.
- They kind of sing.
I think
you could eat a grape.
It just, it's-
- We don't know.
- Wait, it's a thing, though.
- It just makes you not horny.
- Yeah.
A lot of love is showered on you, Adaine,
by the hirelings.
Well, Cathilda gives
you a kiss on the cheek.
Sandra Lynn claps you on the
back and rubs your shoulder,
and everyone's very happy to see you.
- Welcome back, Adaine.
- Thank you, thank you.
- We k*lled that guy
that we were fighting.
- Who?
- Captain.
Captain Whitclaw.
I actually had his sword.
I would have given it to you,
and it would have been a whole thing,
except I had to leave
it to be a good person.
- He seemed bad, and his sword seemed bad.
- Yeah.
- And I guess I have this now?
- I see that we have your- Should we...
I guess, I guess we have like
your sister kidnapped now.
- I need to sleep.
- What's up with your sister?
- She needs to sleep.
- She's evil.
- Telemaine looks at that and says,
"Fandrangor, the Sword of the North Star.
I made that a long time ago."
- Oh, it's beautiful.
- What?
- No way.
- Very cool.
- "Thank you."
- Do you still make weapons?
- "Yes, I am the greatest
Elven swordsman."
- It'll take him like 300 years.
- Do you have one that you already made
that your grandson can have?
- What?
- He looks and says,
"A sword worthy of my grandson..."
- Or maybe just like a barbed sheet.
- A barbed sheet?
- Yeah, that he can whip around.
- You know, like if a
sheet had like little...
- The sheet looked inviting, but hurt.
- I take the sword and
plant it in front of Fabian.
- I pick it up.
- "You wield it well,
Fabbiaan Armaillais."
- Oh, right, say his name again?
- You don't have to.
- "I understand that I
mispronounced it the first time."
- Oh, you worked on it?
- "I did."
- The proper pronunciation is Jorjuj.
- Jorjuj.
- I prefer the way you pronounce it.
- "I want you to know that I respect you,
and you deserve to have your
name pronounced correctly."
- Thank you.
- "I'm going to say your name now."
- I believe you.
- "This is my best
effort to get it right."
- I can't wait.
- "Chet."
- Jej?
- Chet, Chej, Cheg, Chet.
- "Your name is Chej?"
- There are hard G's in high Elvish.
- It sounds like literally
no sound was correct in that.
- You see, he cries a little bit.
He just says, "I'm really embarrassed.
I am really embarrassed."
- We learned a lot on Spring Break.
- I'm going to go
outside for a little bit,
but I really appreciate the attempt.
- I'm gonna sleep.
- Gorgug, how did you
make that call before
when you were able to call Zelda?
- Ayda has the Sending spell,
and maybe, did you?
- I have it, too, if I sleep.
Goodbye.
- Can I talk to Adaine?
- Yes, you were going
to speak to Ayda, yeah.
- Do you think I could
maybe use your Sending spell
to talk to someone back home really quick?
- "Yes."
- Great.
- "150 gold."
- I will absolutely give
you, my friend, money.
- "Is that normal?
Is it strange or bad that I'm doing that?"
- No, I think it's fine.
I have much more money than you.
I guess that's an assumption,
but we got a lot of money
from a recent thing.
Anyway, I would like to send a message
to Jawbone, my counselor,
and I just want to say,
I'm having some relationship woes,
and I just want a little advice,
and I want to put some of that in there.
- "All right, give me 150 gold pieces."
- Of course, yeah, okay, so let's see,
that's 50, 75, 80.
- It might not be the most
financially sound plan
to have a bunch of 150 gold transactions
back and forth for a conversation.
Just, it's your money,
do whatever you want.
- It's 150 gold per?
- Well, I think it's
sending one message there,
one message back, and it's 25 words.
- Just wait for me to
rest, it takes four hours.
- I can't do that.
All right, I'll start with this,
and then I'll switch over to your message.
- Cool.
- I got 300 for this, I
really need an answer.
I keep saying the wrong thing.
- You see that... Cool,
what is the message
that Kristen sends to Jawbone?
- Okay, it says, "Jawbone...
Jawbone, hey, having some
trouble with Tracker.
She's pretty upset at me.
I keep saying the wrong thing.
I kept something from her, oops."
- You send that message.
You immediately get a response back
from Jawbone saying,
"Tough break, kiddo.
Happy to help if I can.
Should I find a way
to contact you other than this spell?"
- Yes.
Oh, I can't say anything.
- You'd have to respond back.
- Goddammit, right...
150.
And it says, "f*ck yes."
- Cool.
You get a response back, "Hell yeah."
- You can borrow my phone if you want.
- What?
- Your phone doesn't work.
- Oh, oh.
Can I just, sorry, yeah.
- You also like, throw it
in the river, didn't you?
- No, this is the new phone
that I got from Adaine.
- Oh, you have like a brick phone, okay.
- Incredible, you guys are healed up.
- Can I dance all night?
- Fabian dances.
- I don't want to rest.
I would like to dance with the fire.
- Give me an Acrobatics
check with advantage
if you'd be so kind.
- Ooh, advantage?
- He's got fire in his belly now.
- Oh, that's a one and a two.
- Can I give him a help
action or something?
- I don't know, this is too sad.
- Oh, Bardic Inspiration?
- But he's dancing like nobody's watching.
- Yeah.
- So I mean, this is brave.
- In a way.
- Fabian, you're just in the groove of it.
You just see that your footsteps
like light the ground behind you
with the dull glow of flame
as you dance and dance and dance
like nobody is watching.
Fabian, it's a beautiful night
of just being in touch with
your body, your feelings.
And for the rest of you guys.
- I think I want to, like
as Adaine's going to sleep,
I just want to poke her and go,
Hey, Adaine, is your sister
still like trying to k*ll us?
'Cause she's just kind of here now.
- I don't think so, I
think that she's maybe,
she just- They kept her
awake for like five months.
- Okay, yeah.
- And it broke her brain and like I,
that's so bad that I had to rescue her.
- Ayda actually comes in with Aelwyn
and looks up at you and says,
"May I deposit this sister
of yours in here with you?"
- Yes.
- You see she lays Aelwyn on the bed.
Aelwyn is, outside of the orb,
you see that her body is still shaking
from like the strain.
- Can I hold her as we go to sleep?
- Aw!
- You hold her as you go to sleep.
And both of you are just out like lights.
- That's so sweet.
- Riz just slowly backs out.
- Both of you trance for
the first time in so long.
And as you trance in the night,
you can almost feel your sister...
She doesn't have any magic
left and is too exhausted.
She just was in this
position for too long.
As you start resting to
get your spells back,
you feel a tiny piece of your
sister's abjurative magic,
like the innate kind of cantrip-
It's her abjurer's ward,
like her class ability.
As she begins to get her
energy back from resting,
you feel her begin to
build a shield around you
in the night as you both trance.
Ayda comes out and finds
you, Fig, and says,
"I think Adaine is very
grateful that we rescued her.
You fight very bravely and-"
- Thank you, this was
not my best work today.
- You see, she says,
"You are extremely loud
and funny and charming
and you talk loudly,
and that's so exciting."
- Thank you so much.
I mean, you're really
direct and analytical
and you kind of deconstruct
things before my eyes
and make me see them in a different way.
And I really like that.
A lot of things I take for granted,
you really think through.
- Just tears of flame
streaked down her face.
- Also you cry fire, which is awesome.
And check it out.
- You see that as you touch it
and it doesn't burn your finger,
she goes, "Ha, that's
something we have in common.
That's bonding."
- That's bonding.
- "Yep.
I live on an island full
of nasty, dirty pirates
so I don't have any other
young women to hang out with.
And this has just been so huge for me.
And you're so cool and kind."
- Why don't you just
come hang out with us?
Why don't you just keep
hanging out with us?
- "Okay."
- The library can run itself.
I mean, the man who works at the front,
he was really on the ball.
- You see, you see, she says,
"That's not been my
experience of Rawlins."
- Okay, from my experience, I was like,
whoo, that's a fast man.
- "Running's all he's good for."
- Wasn't that you running?
- It was you, it was you.
- The fast librarian.
- Incredible.
She looks and says, "I
think Adaine and her sister,
Aelwyn, probably just need to rest."
- Yeah.
- "I need to fully sleep.
Do you fully sleep as well?"
- Yeah.
- "Are you feeling tired from the battle?"
- Yeah.
- "Okay."
- Let's do it up.
Are you asking to have a slumber party?
Because if you're not, I am.
- "Okay, you're asking
that because you want it
and it wouldn't be weird
for me to also want that."
- Look, I understand that you
probably meet a lot of people
that say what they don't mean,
but I pretty much across
the board say what I mean.
But I usually look like someone else.
- "Okay."
- But I mean what I say.
- "Okay, I'm gonna lie down
next to you while we sleep
because I have not had a
friend like that before."
- Yeah, let's do it.
- "And I'm gonna really
take my cues from you
about what's normal about that."
- Okay, physical contact is totally cool.
We've talked about it.
We can just do whatever we want.
- "Great, fantastic.
I'm gonna really follow
your lead on this."
- Yeah.
- You see that she lays down
and immediately starts to snooze.
- I wake her up.
Sorry, part of the slumber party
is actually you stay up late talking.
- "Fantastic."
- Yeah.
- "I got that wrong out of the gate,
but now I know and I won't
make that mistake again."
- First cue is we stay up for a while.
- "Great, fantastic."
- Okay.
- "I love that."
She stays up talking...
Ayda is...
You find out,
is there anything you ask Ayda about
as you guys are slumber partying?
- I think I just maybe
apologize for being Aguefort.
And I wanna say my plan
was to try to get out
of fighting them and make
them think I was your dad
and that I would call
off the military effort
if they gave us...
I wasn't trying to mess with you at all.
- Gotcha.
You see that she says,
"That makes total sense.
And I won't lie.
I caught the short end of
the straw with this disguise,
but normally, your disguises
are extremely delightful."
- Thanks, yeah.
- "So it's all right that this
one didn't pan out for me.
I'm sure the next one will."
- I'm sorry that... It seems
like he's a really powerful guy
and it must be really annoying
seeing everyone idolize him
so much because it doesn't
sound like he was a great dad.
- "No, he was not a great dad."
- It's okay to admit that.
- "I'm admitting it."
- Yeah, he might just
be a bad dad forever.
- "Oh, well."
- But that's okay because you
find cool people in your world
that take the place that you
were looking for from him.
- "A different other dad."
- Well, rather the emotions
you were hoping to get from him
you might find in unexpected places.
- "I have to find these places."
- Actually, yeah, it's a physical place.
Yeah.
Let's go into some caves
and look for emotions.
- "Fantastic."
Fabian is dancing, Adaine's collapsed.
Gorgug and Riz, are you
guys doing anything else
as you arrive back here at Kei Lumennura
or are you-
- I think we just watched Fabian dance.
- I'm in like a, whatever
the Elven equivalent
of a rocking chair is.
- Yeah, we're both sitting on chairs.
- You guys see that there are two treants,
like sort of tall tree beings,
that are like cradling you in their boughs
and like rocking you.
And they're both kind of humming.
- This place isn't so bad.
- How did this part start happening?
- I thought I was just gonna sit in a tree
and it started singing to me.
- Hey, really not horrible.
- Yeah.
- You see that Telemaine
appears behind you and goes,
"Yes, really not horrible at all."
And you see he holds up his
hand, a blossom lands on it
and he looks at you and just gently
shoves it into your mouth.
"Eat it.
Yes."
- Is it good or is it just a flower?
It was beautiful.
- It's gross.
- He glides off into the night.
- Did that dude just feed you a flower?
- Yeah.
- That was insane.
- It's a complex flavor, I don't like it.
- That was insane.
- Kristen.
You, after a little while,
you see Tracker kind of goes
off to sleep on her own.
And also to like create the Moon Haven
for as many people as she can.
- She's got work to do.
- She's got work to do.
And you see that later on in the evening,
a little mote
of light appears before you
and a little scroll glowing
with illusory magic appears.
And it says "A message
from Arthur Aguefort."
- Oh, cool.
- It appears... You see in front of you
a badly injured Arthur
Aguefort at his desk,
wrapped up with bandages, bleeding a lot.
Seated at his desk at
Aguefort Adventuring Academy.
Looks up at you and you see he goes,
"Oh, hello, Kristen.
How's it going?"
- It's good.
Are you okay?
- "I f*cked up."
- What?
- "I f*cked up."
- What happened?
- "I did a bunch of magic.
It was too much.
It was just too much.
I tried, you can't just
destroy a government."
- Oh, got it.
- "You can't just destroy a government."
- Got it.
- "A lot of that stuff was experimental.
I was working on it.
It's not- You shouldn't do that.
I'm in a lot of trouble."
- Yeah.
- "I'm in a lot of trouble.
The government of Solace
is really mad at me.
Really mad at me."
- Oh, cool.
Did you just kind of start
a w*r out of nowhere,
maybe to throw this scent off?
- "I think they're gonna patch it up.
I think I didn't f*ck
anything up too much.
I didn't, yeah, a lot of
that magic was sort of new.
I was working, I was trying it out."
- What?
When you grabbed the sun?
- "Yeah, you're not supposed to do that."
- Yeah.
Okay, cool.
- "It's too much.
It's just too much."
- That was a workshop.
- "I really hurt myself."
- I'm really sorry.
- "It just, the magic
kind of tore up my guts.
Oh, I just..."
- Okay, yeah.
- "I got about 50 miles north
and I just sh*t about an ocean of blood."
- No.
- "Yeah, you can't get that big.
It's just too big."
- Okay, well, hey, so, Aguefort,
I'm so sorry, but it's
four in the morning.
- "Yeah."
- So what's going on?
What's with this personal message to me?
- "I am so sorry, Kristen.
I know, we had that whole
experience in heaven.
I've kind of been going ham for a while.
I had knocked out God and
ran heaven for a bit."
- Yeah.
- "And then I did a spell
where I grabbed the sun
and I tried to topple the government.
Just kind of one-shot a government."
- Yep.
Can't do that.
- "Can't do that."
- Turns out.
- "It's actually, I got close."
- Did you?
- "Well, no, I think I was summoning-
No, I didn't.
They summoned up a lot of
magic to try and stop me.
I got hit with some pretty
powerful Elven counter magic
and a lot of what I was trying to do,
just the force of magic itself
didn't want that to keep happening."
- Yeah, got it.
- "Too big, 450 feet tall is too big."
- That's crazy.
- "You're just, you're huge."
- Yeah.
- "You're just huge at that point."
- Mm-hmm.
- "I sh*t a lot of blood
and I almost passed out."
- Wow.
- "I had to teleport back to Solace."
- Oh.
- "My sort of terracotta army fell apart."
- Uh-huh.
I thought that was... yeah.
- "Yeah."
- So what's up?
- "Jawbone wanted me to reach out."
- Oh, yes, great.
- "He's here, so I just
set up this spell for him."
- Oh!
- "I'm probably gonna have to go to court.
I'm in a lot of trouble."
- Yeah, that sucks...
So you said Jawbone's there, right?
- "Oh, yes."
- No, well, I, well, I
mean, yeah, that's...
- "I really stretched
on this one, you know?"
- Yeah.
- "There was some power.
I grabbed the sun."
- Yeah.
- "They're gonna make me move
the sun back to where it was."
- Oh, that's... yeah.
Wait.
- "I'm gonna have to figure out
how to do that."
- You're gonna have to move it back.
- "Yeah, it's not messing
anything up too much right now.
It's a little bit north
of where it should be."
- Oh.
- "But it's going in the right direction.
It's still going around the Earth,
but it's in the far south of the globe,
it's much more wintry than it should be."
- Interesting.
- "And it's a lot more summery
up here where, you know."
- Huh.
- "I f*cked up."
- Wait, on this planet
the sun goes around the earth?
- "Right.
So, funny story.
Actually, our- Spyre
does go around the sun,
so when I was dragging
the sun across the sky-
I'm actually not, I need to
figure out kind of what I did."
- Oh, sh*t.
- "Because again, it's sort of,
that's a more poetic understanding
of how things really work,
but I really f*cked up.
So I'm gonna live- I don't know.
I've been going pretty ham."
- Yeah.
- "When I was dead for a couple months,
it kind of, it f*cked me up."
- Me too, yeah.
Meeting God, finding out
that he was a frat boy,
that ruined my life.
- "Sorry about that."
- No, it's okay, yeah.
- "Here's Jawbone."
- Oh, great!
And you see he stands up.
You see he kind of puts his pockets over,
and he walks a little way away.
Jawbone goes, "Hey there, Kristen.
Arthur, we're gonna maybe
need the room, bud."
And you see Arthur says, "Huh?
Yeah, yeah, I'm gonna go for a walk.
I don't feel good."
He walks out of the room.
- Is he gonna be okay?
Jawbone looks and says, "He f*cked up."
- Yeah.
- "You can't do that.
You can't go do a one-man
w*r on a whole place,
and get real big and grab the sun.
You can't do that."
- Especially if you're
about to get impeached.
Okay, so, hey Jawbone,
I wanted to talk to,
so I'm having problems with Tracker.
I feel like she got really mad at me
about something that I didn't think
was that big of a deal,
but then I just, I think
that made her even more mad
that I wasn't really listening to her.
- "Okay, what was the
thing that you were, or?"
- Well, now this is another
whole element to it,
because it was something about you,
but I kind of want her to tell you,
is there a way to have this conversation
without me telling you what
this specific thing was?
- You see, he kind of smiles and says,
"Well, Kristen
I gotta say, my interest
is pretty piqued."
- Yeah, definitely.
- "But I'm not gonna make you say anything
you don't wanna say.
I'll try to weigh in and
be as helpful as I can
without all the details."
- See, the next day,
something scary happened,
and she was still mad at me, and I said,
"I thought you slept it off."
And she didn't like that.
- "Okay, you guys were in a fight?"
- Mh-mh.
- "You feel like you can't
say the right things,
and you thought she
would just sleep it off?"
- I thought maybe that would happen.
- "And you told her that?"
- Yeah, I said it to her.
- "Well, Kristen, I think
about the only mistake
you can really make in a relationship
is treating the other person
sort of like a means to an end
rather than kind of an end in themselves.
Does that make sense?"
- That doesn't... Yeah.
- "What is the thing you don't like
about Tracker being mad at you?"
- I guess she's really
distant, and she doesn't wanna,
you know, she's really upset with me.
She keeps like, you know, see,
she's like, "Unbelievable."
- "Yeah."
- But you know her so well.
So I try to pick some
flowers- That's so cheesy,
but something better than that,
something like that's like.
- "Well, let me ask you a question.
Try to answer as honestly as you can.
Did you pick flowers for Tracker
because you wanted her to
start being nice to you again
and to get over it?"
- Interesting, yeah.
- "Does that sound kind of true?"
- Probably, yeah.
- "Now, this is hard.
I'm not, this level of
enlightenment and awareness
is not something that everyone's
just naturally good at,
takes work and effort and everything else.
But what I would probably
say is people can sense
when people are trying to manipulate them
to feel a certain way.
And as unfortunate as it is,
if you had gotten her flowers
because you actually were
sad that she was sad,
it would have probably
meant a very different thing
than getting flowers to
try and sweep a problem
under the rug."
- Yeah.
- "And I know it's hard because, look,
when someone we love is mad at us,
we wanna go into panic
mode and we're defensive
and nobody likes to feel wrong
or like we did something bad.
But...
to the best of your ability,
if you can honor Tracker's
emotions for their own sake,
you're gonna be a better partner to her.
Like, if your main concern
when she's mad or upset
is that she's mad and upset,
and you wanna help address the things
that she has a problem with for her sake,
that's gonna be better than
coming from a place of panic
and just wanting to, just
wanting to get her back
to where she's the most fun for you."
- Totally, yeah, totally, yeah.
- "Right?
So why do you think Tracker was mad?"
- Yeah, yeah, it's just that...
- "Because you gotta have
that level of empathy.
You gotta be able to look
at your partner and say-"
- I think that's totally true.
Yeah, I think she was really upset
about something that I
thought wasn't necessarily-
It was more, I heard some information
that was very pertinent to her
and she was the last person I told it to.
- "Oh, okay, I gotcha.
Well, you know, people make mistakes.
But I think that you owe it to Tracker,
if you wanna patch things up,
to understand that that's not her values.
Now, you know, secret-keeping
is a hard, tricky thing.
There could be instances
where it's important
to keep a secret from your partner.
You know, nothing's set in stone.
But you know now about
Tracker that for her,
having full transparency and
trust between the two of you
is something that really matters to her."
- Definitely.
- "And maybe the thing to communicate
is that you didn't know that before,
you do know that now.
The one thing Tracker,
it wouldn't be fair to
Tracker to be mad about
is for you to have not known something
that isn't natural to you.
If you think keeping secrets
from someone's not a big deal,
that's not your fault.
It's just something that
now you have to learn
and grow and move on."
- Yeah, totally.
- "Right?"
- Cool.
Cool, well, thank you, Jawbone.
- "Appreciate it.
How's spring break going?
Adventure doing good?"
- Oh, it's great, yeah.
All the guys are burned and...
- "That sounds normal."
- Yeah, and we're just having a good time
with all the elves who are, like, silky.
- "Elves kinda are silky."
- They are, everything
about them is silky.
- "I traveled around a lot.
I met a lot of very silky elves."
- I have to pee too bad
to listen to this conversation anymore.
Be right back.
- You see that Jawbone
looks at you and goes,
"Well, you know, kiddo,
I think you and Tracker
work really well together.
I love that-"
- I have a question.
- "Yeah, go for it."
- Are you the type of person who thinks
a secret should not be kept
from you when it's a big issue?
- "In my opinion, hard and
fast rules about behavior
always tend to have exceptions."
- True.
- "So keeping secrets,
not keeping secrets,
doing stuff, not doing stuff.
I think every situation,
you just gotta make a call
with your heart for the most part.
What I will say is,
I think it's usually pretty silly
to try and protect people from the truth.
I feel like more harm gets
done from people not knowing
than from people knowing
in general."
- Cool.
I think that's great.
Okay, well, can you call me
at this time tomorrow again
to talk really quick?
- "I'd be happy to, kiddo."
- Thanks so much, Jawbone.
- "Give my love to Tracker."
- I will.
- "Give my love to you."
- Hey, thank you.
- "Love you, kiddo."
- I love you, too.
- "Please give my love
to Sandra Lynn too."
- I sure will.
I'm definitely gonna
talk to her immediately.
Yeah.
- He nods and says, "All right, take care.
Thanks for checking in, okay?"
- Okay, of course, thank you.
Bye, Jawbone.
- Little message vanishes.
- Sweet.
- You go off to sleep.
The next morning, you
all awake in Fallinel.
Or except for Fabian, who
has danced through the night.
- All night.
All night.
- Incredible.
As you dance through the night, sun rises
and Telemaine walks from the trees
and your grandfather
begins to dance with you
as the dew assembles on the leaves.
- I'll play a little music
for them to dance to.
- Great, on the bass?
- Yeah.
- Under the new darkness.
Ayda is just completely passed out.
She's in deep, deep sleep.
You guys were up all night talking.
Telemaine looks at you and says,
"I danced for so many years
in these glades and meadows
with your mother, Fabbiaan."
- I understand why now.
I've never danced before.
And it feels so right.
It is who I am.
- "It is, my grandson.
To feel the movement of
your body on the grass,
the leaves of the trees.
You belong here, Fabbiaan."
- Part of me does, Grandfather.
Of course, but I mean, I can't stay here.
I have to go with my friends.
We have to defeat the Nightmare King.
- "It is a cruel world beyond these shores
that would see such beautiful children
have to
do stuff.
You should not have to do stuff.
You should instead be
ever in these meadows,
eating grapes and dancing around,
dancing around forever."
- Maybe I'll come back one day.
- "Please come back."
- And dance a little more.
- "I only wish for you to dance ever
a little more, my grandson.
Eat this."
- Don't, it's gross!
- It's a regular flower.
- It's very good.
- "Thank you."
He glides away.
You guys assemble that morning,
your party all together.
Ayda is still here with you.
Your hirelings are all here.
And in the morning, as
you come out of trance,
Adaine, you open your eyes
and you see a very sick
and shivering Aelwyn.
It looks like she has not recovered.
- Can I, are there any
kind of like a hot spring
or something that I can take her down to
and just get her cleaned up?
- Yes, absolutely.
You go, there are some Elven
healers who wash Aelwyn.
And you see-
- I'm gonna stay by her side.
I don't wanna leave her alone.
- You stay there.
Telemaine looks at you and says,
"We would be happy to keep
your sister here if you wish."
- It's up to her.
- You stay by her side.
Her eyes flicker open.
She looks at you and goes,
"Adaine?"
- Aelwyn.
- "We're out of the tower."
- We're out of the tower.
- "Did we escape or did we die?"
- No, we escaped.
- "Oh, good."
- We're alive.
- "I, I didn't really take care of you."
- No, but that's okay.
I'm gonna take care of you now.
- She puts out a hand
and a very feeble shield surrounds you.
And you see she goes,
"I don't remember everything."
- That's okay.
Don't worry about it.
It's okay.
You don't have to do anything
right now, but get better.
- "Okay."
Give me an Insight check with advantage,
if you'd be so kind.
- 16?
Yes, 16.
- You see a look of confusion
or something in her eyes.
And you sense that she is
having trouble navigating
her own mind,
that there's something changed
or different about her mind.
There's something going
on within her thoughts
that is confusing and upsetting.
- Can I give her Boggy to hold?
- Yes.
- And can I, as a ritual,
cast Detect Magic on her?
- Yes, you can.
You cast Detect Magic.
As you cast Detect Magic on her,
there is a faint aura of enchantment magic
somewhere around her, but
it's deep and well-hidden.
You find it, only the
faintest whisper of it,
but there's something
going on in her mind.
- Can I cast Detect Thoughts on her?
- You do.
- You cast Detect Thoughts.
Start to move through her mind.
The t*rture has had a profound
corrosive effect on Aelwyn's well-being,
and her memory is really warped and hurt.
As you're casting Detect
Thoughts and moving through her,
you see, it's almost like a vision to you.
You're like walking through her mind.
And you see, it's like a
city that's been raised
to the ground or bombed out.
And you see all these walls and defenses
and battlements with magical arcane towers
that have all crumbled,
and you look at these intense
arcane defenses everywhere
and recognize your sister's personality.
The horrible, mean, wicked, sarcastic,
you see the wreckage of that,
and it is like the ringed
walls of a great city.
And you're walking through
this weird, vulnerable
labyrinth of images,
and most of what you see is
deep self-loathing.
And a lot of the memories
of self-loathing,
you see memories that you don't remember
from this perspective of
you being scorned and chided
and dismissed by your parents
and actively cast aside into second place.
And you see your sister there,
and you never remember your sister
doing anything heroic,
interceding on your
behalf, doing anything.
But what you see now in all these moments
is Aelwyn's loathing of herself
for never saying anything,
this natural, abjurative instinct,
and overpowering that.
The thing that is more powerful
than that self-loathing
is her fear of your parents,
of just not wanting to put
herself in front of them.
And then that, of course, that cowardice
feeds directly back
into the self-loathing,
which feeds back and back
and back, over and over again
through as many memories as exist
throughout your childhood.
A horrible acknowledgement
that she was the golden child,
and as long as she never f*cked up,
she would never have
to face what you faced.
In the center of this labyrinth,
you find
an intense, magical charm,
and it's wrapped up,
and it's all of Aelwyn's abjurations
mixed with that faint
enchantment that you can see.
And you get the sense that in that orb,
they had been searching for this
over and over and over again.
And you see there's writing
on the outside of this,
and it says,
"Despite all of the
torment and tribulation,
let this be proof.
I always knew there was only one person
clever enough to find this."
- I touch it.
- Do you attempt to dispel this effect?
- Will it work?
Does it seem like it will work
without dispelling her own magic?
- It seems like you can trigger this
with a dispelling action,
and it will do what
Aelwyn intended it to do.
- Then yes.
You are shunted out through the city.
I'm gonna describe something
very heartbreaking now.
- No.
- Aelwyn's mind returns.
The version of her mind she saved
before all of this happened.
You feel that your sister
is no longer broken.
The memory of herself,
the version of her mind,
using that custom Modify Memory
spell, comes back,
as you are now
once again in your own body,
standing next to her,
and you see a very
physically feeble Aelwyn go,
"Ah!
Ah!
Ah!
Adaine.
Little sister."
That's all for this
week on "Fantasy High."
- Get out of here!
- Eat your g*dd*mn dice, Brennan.
- Woo!
- I got my sugar dice right here.
Guys, that's all for this
week on "Fantasy High."
Tune in next week.
We will see you guys then.
Thank you, as always, for watching.
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07x10 - The Dangerous Mind of Aelwen Abernant
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A tabletop role-playing game show produced by and broadcast on Dropout and created and generally hosted by Brennan Lee Mulligan as the show's regular Dungeon Master.
A tabletop role-playing game show produced by and broadcast on Dropout and created and generally hosted by Brennan Lee Mulligan as the show's regular Dungeon Master.