02x05 - Sha-Boo! Ya

[bunniefuu]

- [pumpkin heads thud]

- I know what you're thinking.

It's Halloween Week, so let's
all scare poor little Newt.

Well, not this year.
I'm a new man.

I threw away my nightlight.

Well, actually,
my dad did.

But it was a mutual decision.

Anyway, I am not
getting scared.

- TROY & SAWYER: Boo!
- NEWT: [screams]

- Oh, man, I love Halloween.
- Yeah.

- I don't.

That's why I choose
to celebrate

October 31st's other holiday--
World Savings Day.

If you'd like to join me,

I'll be making a deposit into
my high-yield savings account.

- Money's for spending.
- And makin' it rain.

- Word.

So, why don't you like
gettin' scared, Newt?

- Because it's scary.

If you guys ever got really,
truly frightened,

you wouldn't think
it was fun either.

- Well, if you don't wanna
get scared this week,

you should hang out
with the girls.

- I totally agree.
Girls are not scary.

- Hi, guys.
- NEWT: [screams]

World Savings Day.
World Savings Day.

World Savings Day.

- ♪

♪ You won't find
me in the bleachers ♪

- ♪ Yeah that girl
is one of us ♪

- ♪ I'm made of spice
and sugar ♪

- ♪ She's pretty...
she's pretty tough ♪

- ♪ Then add
a little glitter ♪

- ♪ She off in
a cloud of dust ♪

- ♪ And you get...
you get... ♪

- ♪ A game changer,
play maker ♪

♪ Take the ball,
she'll see ya later ♪

- ♪ I'm on a dreamlike,
teamlike ♪

♪ Livin' like
one of the boys ♪

- ♪ She got it goin', goin',
she got it goin' on ♪

- ♪ Play like Friday night

♪ Kickin' like
one of the boys ♪

- ♪ She got it goin', goin',
she got it goin' on ♪

- ♪ One of the boys

- [spooky music]

- [bats squeaking]

- ♪

- What's going on?
- Shhh!

[whispering]
Watch.

- Uncle! Uncle!
[honking horn]

- COACH: [screaming]

- BELLA & TROY:
[laughing]

- COACH: [screaming]

- [horn honking]

- BELLA: Coach!

- BELLA, TROY, SAWYER:
[laughing]

- You're scared of clowns?

- No. No. I'm...
I'm not scared of clowns.

[laughing]
I hate 'em.

They're stupid.

Okay, look, I...

I know it's Halloween Week

and you two love
your little scares,

but someone could end
up hurt like Silas Potter did.

- Who?
- Wait. Wait.

You mean that old ghost story
about the groundskeeper?

Supposedly he died
in the shed

behind the football
field, right?

- Isn't there a rhyme
or something about him?

- Oh, yeah.

♪ If you go near
Potter's shed ♪

♪ He will surely
give you bread ♪

- Bread? No. It's...

♪ If you go near
Potter's shed ♪

♪ You will surely
end up dead ♪

- That makes much
more sense.

- Okay, enough of this.

We should be starting
to get ready

for the football and cheerleader
camp out tomorrow night.

- Oh, Coach, can we help
you set up the tents?

- No, but you could
help each other set 'em up.

I have to make a deposit
in my new bank account.

Happy World Savings Day.
[laughs]

- I totally forgot
about the camp out.

- Yeah, we could
scare the girls.

- On the field.
- In the dark.

- Oh, this is the scare
we've been trainin' for.

- TROY & SAWYER:
[clapping]

Bo-o-o-o-o-o-o!

- Ooooh, so,
when do we start?

Oooooh!

[claps hands]

- Bella, girls just
aren't good at scaring.

- Excuse me?

- It's science.

It's been proven
in horror movies--

which are scientific.
- Mm-hm.

- They're often set
in laboratories, so...

- I am so sick
of this attitude.

Did you learn nothing from what
I did with the football team?

Girls can do anything
just as well as guys can...

[laughs]
...if not better.

- All right, prove it.

How would you scare them?

- Uh...

Girls share each other's
deepest and darkest fears.

I know Sophie and Pepper's
deepest and darkest fears.

- And?

- And we can use their
fears against them.

- Interesting.

- So, am I in?

Okay, enough with
the silent discussion.

Just tell me--yes or no.

- You're in, traitor.

So, what are
they afraid of?

- Okay, Pepper is absolutely
terrified of...

- Zombies? I'm not
afraid of zombies.

- I know, but I told them
when you were little,

you had a cat that
you thought was dead,

so you buried it.

But it wasn't dead.

And it clawed its way
out of the ground.

And you woke up to find it
trying to eat your face off.

- Okay, now I am afraid
of zombies--and cats.

- And you.

- Why are you making up
things I'm afraid of?

- I had to earn
their trust.

They're going to
try to scare you

tomorrow night
at the camp out

and they think
I'm going to help them.

[whispering]
But I'm not.

- Oh, so you're going
to double-cross them.

- Exactly.

I'm sick of the boys saying
girls aren't good at things.

- After all this time,
they're still disrespecting you.

- That's why we're gonna use
their own plan against them.

We're gonna show them how
real scaring is done.

- That's right--we're gonna
make them pee their pants.

- And that is just
phase number one.

- What's phase number two?

Oh.

Number two.

- So, what's my fake fear?

Werewolves? Vampires?
El chupacabra?

- Admiral Whitney's
fried chicken.

- Oh...

That's really...

Why?

- Because I want Sawyer
to bring me fried chicken.

- Oh, tell him
I'm super afraid

of those fluffy biscuits.

- I already did.
- [palm slap]

- [spooky music]
- [jaw clacking]

- This has been a disaster.

I really wanted something
scary that could go viral.

But there's no paranormal
activity in the library.

- Except for that
old DVD copy

of "Paranormal Activities."
- Yeah.

And spooky noises in
the teachers' bathroom

were exactly what
we hoped they weren't.

- Farts.

- Where else are
we going to find a ghost?

- Ghost videos aren't the only
thing that can go viral.

My dog can bark
a Rihanna song.

- Call me when he can bark
"5 Seconds of Summer."

- Oh...
- Wait.

One of you put something in my
locker to scare me, didn't you?

- Come on, what do we look
like--a couple of amateurs?

- Huh, the old locker trick?
Please.

Dude, why didn't we think
of the old locker trick?

- I don't know.
- It's so good.

- There better not be
anything in here.

- ALL: [gasp]

- You guys put an old
padlock in my locker?

That's not scary.

I mean, I do have an irrational
aversion to rust,

but it's under control.

- No, it wasn't us.
- "Silas Potter"?

Isn't that the guy
who died in the shed?

- Supposedly.
Everyone knows it's all made up.

- Yeah, it's just some
dumb ghost story.

- Yeah.

- Well, you guys
are the only ones

who know my locker
combination,

so, if it wasn't you,
then...maybe it was...

- Ooh, the ghost
of Silas Potter.

- Cut it out.
You're not scaring anyone.

- Did you hear
that, Chauncy?

The ghost of Silas Potter might
be lurking around Silverado.

We have to stake out
the shed overnight.

- I had planned on teaching
my dog some Beyoncé.

But I guess it could wait.

- [spooky music]

- Are you sure
we have enough tape?

Because we have to let
this thing run all night.

- Yes. Goodbye
"Chancy's First Steps."

[sighing]

Think we're actually gonna
catch anything scary on tape?

- [raspy exhaling]

- [high-pitched voice]
What was that?

- COACH: [clearing throat]

Sorry. I swallowed a mosquito
the size of a walnut.

[raspy exhaling]

[throat clears]

I'm good.

- Oh, the mosquitos
are biting.

- Do you know where there
aren't giant mosquitos?

In my press box.

We can wait up there
while this thing tapes.

- Great, I can show you
some videos on--

- I'm sick of hearing about
your stupid singing dog. Unh!

- Fine, but he's got
a voice of an angel.

- ♪

- [whistle shrills]

- Before we get started with
our camp out activities,

did everyone turn in
their cell phones to Coach?

- Coach, why can't
we use our phones?

- Because this camp out is about
talking with your teammates,

playing games,
and learning new things.

- All things I can
do on my phone.

- You'll get your
phones back tomorrow,

and...and don't try
to go look for them.

They're hidden very well.

- [cell phone buzzing]
- [cell phone music]

- [cell phone text bings]
- I'll find a new hiding place.

- In just a few minutes,

I will be leading
a moonlight nature walk.

- Great.

- And, if we're lucky,

someone will get poison ivy
so we can witness

the devastating power
of nature up close.

Oh, it's gonna be so fun!

- Burning and itching
--so fun.

- Okay, once everyone leaves,
we can get set up.

- I hid all the scaring supplies
behind the old shed.

- You kids aren't messing around
Silas Potter's shed, are you?

- Coach, you do not
believe in that, right?

- Yeah, it's all made up.
- No, it's not.

Fifty years ago today,

some kids pulled a huge
scare on Silas Potter.

They locked him in the shed.

By the time they went
back to let him out,

he had died of fright.

- Really?

- They say some nights
you can hear Silas' ghost

banging against
the door saying...

who locked me in here?
[tapping hands]

So!
- ALL: [gasping]

- I've gotta hit
the nature walk.

Take my advice.
Stay away from that shed.

- Guys, did you hear that?
If I have the lock--

that means the shed is open
and Silas can get out.

And to make it even worse,

the interest on my savings
account just dropped by 2%.

- Newt, my interest
is dropping even faster.

So, come on, we've got
scaring to do.

- [spooky music]

- Why are you dressed
like that?

- TROY: I'm Pepper's cat,
come back from the dead...

as a zombie.
[growling]

Is that too much?

- Just right.

- And what's more terrifying
than the Admiral's fried chicken

delivered by
the Admiral himself?

- Okay, everybody just quiet
down, all right?

We don't wanna give
ourselves away.

Just think about how awesome
this scare's gonna be.

Hee. Hee. Hee. Hee.

Yeah, I'm sorry.

- [crunching outside tent]
- Oh, that must be them.

Everybody, get ready.
- Quick.

- Let me know when it's over.
I'm goin' fetal.

- Uh, wait, who's that?

- [chainsaw buzzing]

- SAWYER & TROY:
[screaming]

- [snarling]

- SAWYER, NEWT, TROY:
[screaming]

- PEPPER, SOPHIE, BELLA:
Sha-Bo!-Ya!

[laughing]

- Still think girls aren't
good at scaring?

- TROY: [high-pitched]
Okay.

I'll admit...
[labored breathing]

...maybe I was wrong.
- SOPHIE: Yep.

- And thank you, Sawyer,
for this fried chicken.

I don't care if he lied
about his military record.

I love the Admiral.
[chomping chicken]

- Wow, I can't believe this.

That was sneaky, underhanded,
and just mean.

I'm impressed.

- I'm impressed
you pulled together

a period-authentic
Admiral costume so quickly.

- I have a guy.

- Uh, Sophie?
- What, Newt?

- Was anyone else helping
you with your scare?

- No, it was just us.

- Then who is that?

- [door rattling]

- Uh, is that...?
- It couldn't be.

- It's Silas Potter.

- [clippers snipping]

- ALL: [screaming]

- [clippers snipping]

- ALL: [screaming]

- TROY: Okay, okay,
okay, okay, okay!

That was not Silas Potter.

Who's playin' us?

- I don't know.

Everyone else is out
on the nature walk.

- How do we know you
guys aren't behind this?

- Really?

Look how much more
scared we are than you.

I mean...

look how scared we all are.

- This scare
is way too good.

There's no way
the boys are behind this.

- Hold up.
Maybe it was you, traitor.

- Yeah, you were
playing both sides.

How can any of us
trust you?

- I don't think Bella has
anything to do with this.

- Then who is it?
- Silas Potter.

- That's just a spooky story.
- No, it's not.

Coach said he's been
locked up all these years

and I found his padlock,
so that must mean he's out.

And he wants revenge.

- Newt, that is crazy.

- It is, Bella, is it?!

- Yes, Newt, it...
it is crazy.

- Okay, okay, fine,
don't believe me.

But there's someone out there
who's trying to scare us

and maybe worse than that.

We can't just sit around and
talk--we have to do something.

- Like what?

- Well, I'm no horror
movie expert,

but I think the best
thing to do is split up.

- Yeah. Yeah.
- That's smart.

- One group should find
a way to call their parents

and the other should stay
here and barricade the door.

- I have a spare cell
phone in my locker

in case my brothers flush mine
down the toilet--again.

I go through a lot
of cell phones.

- Perfect--take Troy
and Sawyer with you

and me, Bella, and Pepper
will stay here.

There's a flashlight in
the locker room if you need it.

- I think we'll be fine.

- [power thuds]
- ALL: [screaming]

- [dramatic music]

- What do you think
those screams were?

- Uh, it's probably just
the wind, you know,

that old Texas...
screaming wind.

- What if someone
saw Potter's ghost?

Shouldn't someone go
down and investigate?

- Huh. I...I don't know.
You should go.

- I'm not in charge.
You should go.

- Good news--I just
put you in charge.

So you should go.

- All right, since I'm in
charge, I'm sending you.

- Fine. How about
neither of us go?

- Oh...
that's good decision making.

Keep it up and one day
you'll be back in charge.

- It looks clear.

- Let me check.

Anybody in here?!

- Shhhh!
- Okay.

- Whose parents do we call?

- Forget parents.
I'm calling the cops.

- ALL: [screaming]

- TROY: Oh, awesome!

I totally forgot
I set that up earlier.

Woo! That scare was so good,
I scared myself.

[laughing]

- [cell phone ringing]

- Who is this?

- Uh, I don't know.

It says "Unknown."

Only Bella and Pepper
know this number.

- [phone continues ringing]

- Oh.

- Hello?

- [clippers snipping]

- MALE VOICE:
Who locked me in here?

- ALL: [screaming]

- [stomping cell phone]

- ALL: [screaming]

- Sorry, I had to use
the little boys' room.

Anyway, let's get started
on this barric--

The barricade looks good.

- Yep, there's no way
he's getting in here now.

- So, what if Silas Potter

walks straight through
because he's a ghost?

Or worse--what if he can
turn into a zombie cat,

and I think he's kinda cute
and I wanna pet him

and he bites me and, boom,
I'm a zombie cat, too, and--

- Pepper, breathe!

- [inhaling]

[exhaling]

- No one is getting
through that door.

We'll be fine.

- [door thuds]
- ALL: [gasping]

Coach?

- What are you kids
doing in here?

You should be on
your nature walk

and why is this
door blocked?

- ALL: [mixed
overlapping comments]

- Okay, okay,
just let me in and you can--

Oh! Oh! Ow! No!
Don't! Don't!

- PEPPER, BELLA, NEWT:
[screaming]

- TROY, SAWYER, SOPHIE:
[screaming]

- SAWYER:
Silas Potter is real!

- We know! He got Coach!
- What?

- We've gotta call for help.
Sophie, where's your phone?

- Broken. Troy dropped it.

- There was a hot
potato situation.

It was everybody's fault.

- We tried looking for a phone
upstairs, but no luck.

- What are we gonna do?
- I know what to do.

I just remembered
that Silas Potter rhyme.

- Yeah, we know.

♪ If you go
near Potter's shed ♪

♪ You will surely
end up bread ♪

How is that gonna help?

- It's "dead" not "bread"
and there's a second part.

"If this ghost
is ever free,

lock him where
he's meant to be."

- I don't think it works
unless you sing it.

- I'm not gonna sing it.

We've gotta lock Silas Potter
back in his shed.

- What?! We can't
go out there.

That is crazy!

- It is, Bella, is it?!

- Yes, Newt, it's still crazy.

- Yeah, I suggest
not goin' there.

- Okay, fine, I'm goin' in.
Last chance.

Who's with me?

- ALL: Oooh...

- All right, I guess
it has to be me.

- New, wait!
- No!

- NEWT: Silas Potter,
show yourself!

- Actually,
don't listen to him.

Go somewhere far away.

- Newt, come back inside.

- No, I got this.

I think.

- Okay, look, the man
has got this.

I'ma just go.
- No.

- Newt!
- [scissors snipping]

- ALL: [screaming]

- Come on!
- Newt, get away!

- Get out!
- Come out!

- [door thudding]

- A little help!

- Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah!

- NEWT: "If this ghost
is ever free,

lock him where
he's meant to be."

[straining]

- Newt, you did it!
You're my hero!

[kissing cheek]

What?

He saved our lives.
- It was nothing.

I'm just glad I got
out of that alive.

- You didn't!
- [clippers snipping]

- ALL: [screaming]

- [clippers snipping]

- After all...

are you frightened?

- ALL: Yes!!

- I'm almost at
my number two!

- ALL: [screaming]

- Then I guess that means...

gotcha, suckas!
[laughing]

- COACH: [laughing]
- ALL: Coach?

- COACH & NEWT:
Sha-Boo!-Ya!

- Wait, what is going on?

- I wanted you guys to know

exactly how it feels
when you scare me

and I knew the only
way to do that

was to pull the biggest
scare ever.

- COACH: [laughing]
- And you helped him?

- I felt sorry for
the little guy.

And I wanted revenge

for you guys scaring me with
that...that clown thing.

I mean, I wasn't scared.
Uh...

clowns are stupid.

- Wait. Okay, so if it
was just you two,

who grabbed Coach?

- That would be me.

[grunting, screaming]

[laughing]

And my ex-wife said those mime
classes would never pay off.

Who's laughing now?
Who's laughing?

- Your ex-wife and everyone who
knew you took mime classes.

- Coach also shut off the lights
and called your phone.

- But how did you
know that number?

- I know all your
phone numbers--

even your emergency one.

- Yeah, I take back my kiss.

- You can't take
it from here.

- Uh, Newt, I have to
say I'm impressed.

This is definitely
the best scare ever.

- Yeah, it was amazing.
- You saw I did my little thing.

- So, how much of that
Silas Potter stuff was true?

- Well, the real story is

Silas Potter accidentally
locked himself in his shed.

- Uh, did he die?

- Yep.
- ALL: Oh...

- Joined by his family
and friends 30 years later.

- ALL: Oh.

- He got out of the shed
pretty easily.

Apparently, there's
a loose board in the back.

- Oh, is that how you
got out, Coach?

- Oh, yeah, this old thing
is barely standing.

- [wood cracking]

- ALL: [gasping]

- [laughing]
Uh-oh.

- It's okay. Nobody uses
that old shed anyway.

- Well, uh, all your
cell phones were in there.

- ALL: [screaming]

- Okay, I think we have
our viral ghost video.

- Are you sure?

We really didn't
get anything on tape.

- I know, but I did
a little editing

and I tried to make
it truly terrifying.

Check it out.

- [raspy exhaling]

- ALL: [screaming]

- I don't know if that's
good enough to go viral.

- Fine--show me your dog
singing a Rihanna song.

- Oh, prepare to be wowed.

- [musical woofing]
- Are you insane?

How could you hold
out on me?

This dog's a genius.

- [musical woofing]

[howling]

- ♪