02x07 - Nick Takes Over Holidays

[bunniefuu]

Nick, you give me some love.

Hey, you guys, happy holidays.

This is your grandmother's famous blue jell-o mold.

Stop!

Hey.

Man, holidays, they're the worst, right?

You're at the dinner table with your family all yippin' and a'yappin'.

You got your uncle with food all in his beard

From last year.

That's nasty.

Then you got your cousins just fighting and bickering

And your cheek-pinching auntie

And your grandfather talking about

His famous jell-o mold.

And your grandmama showing embarrassing pictures.

You know what?

I'm taking over the holidays.

♪♪ I'm taking over ♪♪

♪♪ Come on ♪♪

♪♪ Ain't no party like a nick cannon party ♪♪

♪♪ 'Cause a nick cannon party don't stop ♪♪

♪♪ Ain't no party like a nick cannon party ♪♪

♪♪ 'Cause a nick cannon party don't stop ♪♪

I can't take this.

Ah, yeah, whoo!

Tammy...

What's wrong, girl?

It's cool, right?

Hey, I'm taking over the holidays, right?

So let's get started.

All right.

Easter.

♪♪ Gettin' my bunny on ♪♪

♪♪ Gettin' my bunny on ♪♪ yeah!

Painting eggs can get a little boring.

Know what?

I got an idea.

Painting the parents! Yeah!

See, this is my spin on easter.

Instead of eggs, their parents' heads are cooler, right?

Right!

All right, what's your name?

My name's carolyn.

And your name? David.

And your name? Ina.

You ready to paint your parents' heads?

Yeah! What about you?

Yeah! And you?

Yeah!

All right, let's go for it.

Get your decoratin' on.

Oh, yeah! We should go headhunting.

Get it, 'cause the heads are...anyways...

You guys did a really good job.

You ready to go?

Kids: yeah.

Let's hop off! Come on!

Parents: hey, where are you going?

Nick: bye, parents!

♪♪ Ni-ni-ni-nick cannon-- nick cannon ♪♪

Let's see here, uh...

Ah.

Valentine's day.

I'm cupid.

Hey, since I'm trying to turn today into a holiday,

What better day than valentine's day?

Got my bow and arrow.

Now it's time to go spread the love.

Oh, yeah.

Got you!

Are you in love?

No.

I just shot you with the love arrow!

You love him?

Yeah.

Why do you love him?

'Cause he's my brother.

See? That's how it's supposed to work.

So I did my job, right? Yeah.

Ah! Shot!

Are you feeling the love? Yeah.

So the first person you see you're supposed to be in love with.

Who are you in love with?

Hah!

See that?

Now you gotta buy her lots and lots of roses and stuff.

Thank you, man!

Yeah, yeah. Watch out, bro.

Ain't that type of party.

Ah, I got you.

I see the love is working. You got children.

Anytime you need me to sh**t you

To keep the sparks going,

Just hit me up.

All right. Ah!

Got you!

You're supposed to be, like, buying her

Lots of roses and candy

And celebrating valentine's day.

You got the budget for that?

No.

I gotta get a new job.

I tried to sh**t her so she can fall in love with me,

But it didn't work out.

I think the arrow thing isn't doing the job

That it's supposed to do.

I need to bring out the heavy, heavy a*tillery.

[Sound of a long kiss]

Aw, yeah, baby, we got the heavy a*tillery now.

Love cannon water balloons. Ha ha!

Filled with love juice!

They'll never know what him 'em.

Fire in the hole!

Nooooo!

♪♪ Nick cannon ♪♪

October... .

Halloween.

Few good things about halloween

Is dressing up and getting free stuff while trick-or-treating.

Right, guys?

Yeah! All right.

It's nowhere near halloween,

But we'll take that part of that holiday

And put it in today.

You guys ready to go trick-or-treatng?

Yeah!

Let's see what happens.

This looks like a good house.

[Rings doorbell] trick or treat!

Y'all got any milk?

I know it's kind of awkward, a cow asking for milk...

It's not halloween yet.

I know, but... We just getting, you know...

A head start.

You got anything you can give us?

Yes.

Rubber hot dogs, can we use that?

How about this?

Fish food, all right! Fishy food!

All right. Good stuff.

That's all right. Happy halloween.

Thank you.

Kids: thank you!

Jail bird with flip flops on.

You're a true player.

Yeah.

It seems like you broke right out of jail,

Went on vacation.

[Rings doorbell]

Trick or treat!

Whatever you got, player.

You gonna give us your sandwich?

That's nice of you.

Peanut butter and jelly.

We scored, y'all.

That's pretty good stuff, right? Yeah.

Kids: thank you!

Where you guys think we should go next? There!

All right, let's go there.

[Rings doorbell]

Ooh.

A big ol' plump, juicy turkey.

You got any seasoning?

No seasoning. Sorry.

Well, we thank you.

It made my bag extra heavy.

Thank you!

Now what are you?

A bumblebee.

Aw, you're such a pretty bumblebee.

A bumblebee with style. You like the j-lo version of bumble bees.

Trick or treat!

You got anything for us? We'll take whatever you got.

What is this?

We're taking over the holidays.

We'll wait right here.

You guys are gonna wait right here?

Yeah.

You guys thirsty?

Yeah, we're thirsty!

Whoo! Want a juice?

Aw, we always with juice.

See, I told you guys this would be lucrative.

All right, guys. I think we did pretty good!

You ready to divvy it all up?

Kids: yeah.

All right, everybody dip their bags in the middle.

Yeah, I think we got some good stuff.

You get the little toilet-bowl scrubber.

The latex gloves for you.

Bagels for the surfers. My man.

You got a lot of good stuff here.

But it seems like something's missing.

Check these bags.

Oh! There we go.

Think I'm gonna take this home with me.

Yeah, baby, taking over the holidays!

What you got to say?

[Dog growls]

♪♪ Nick cannon ♪♪

♪♪ Joy to my curls ♪♪

♪♪ The naps is long ♪♪

Announcer: yes! Just in time for the holidays,

It's oswald sings the holidays,

Which includes a long list of holiday hits like this hanukkah great.

♪♪ Hava sofia ♪♪

♪♪ Hava tameka ♪♪

♪♪ Hava danisa, patrice and lisa ♪♪

Announcer: get your jingle on with...

♪♪ Jingle bells, jingle bells ♪♪

♪♪ Jingle all the way ♪♪

♪♪ Oh what fun it is to ride ♪♪

♪♪ And I ain't got a car to stay in now ♪♪

Announcer: and for a little patriotic flavor...

♪♪ My cousin tiffany ♪♪

♪♪ She can't sing a lick to me ♪♪

Announcer: trick-or-treaters love this halloween classic.

♪♪ Get off my dang porch ♪♪

♪♪ I ain't got no candy ♪♪

Announcer: and serenade your sweetheart with...

♪♪ Would you be my valentine ♪♪

♪♪ For only . ♪♪

♪♪ 'Cause I'm on a budget ♪♪

Announcer: that's right, oswald,

And for only $ . ,

Everyone's got a reason

This holiday season

To listen up and enjoy

Oswald sings the holidays,

Which includes this bonus track.

♪♪ You better go outside ♪♪

♪♪ And check to see ♪♪

♪♪ If somebody breakin' in your store ♪♪

♪♪ Ain't no silent nights where I come from ♪♪

Announcer: yes, with the fine music stylings

Of mr. Oswald watkins...

Love, peace, chicken grease.

We guarantee your holidays will never be the same.

♪♪ Ni-ni-ni-nick cannon, nick cannon ♪♪

Hey, go get your snack, 'cause we'll be right back.

Yeah, money!

Spunkle sam wants you.

Hold it down!

Stop! Can't move, can ya? Ha!

Naaaah!

What?

This is great.

The show.

Oh, all right, march .

St. Patrick's day.

[Bagpipe music]

Wow, st. Patrick's day music is awful.

We gotta change that, baby.

And I know just the guys to help me out.

Man, irish accent: hey, could you do me a favor?

Drop it.

♪♪ Hey, st. Patrick's day ♪♪

h*.

♪♪ Hey, st. Patrick's day ♪♪

♪♪ h* ♪♪

♪♪ Hey, st. Patrick's day ♪♪

♪♪ h* ♪♪ ♪♪ hey, st. Patrick's day ♪♪

♪♪ Don't stop, rock the shamrock ♪♪

♪♪ Don't stop, rock the shamrock ♪♪

♪♪ Don't stop, rock the shamrock ♪♪

♪♪ Don't stop, yo, rock the shamrock ♪♪

♪♪ Don't don't do-do-don't ♪♪

♪♪ Yo, do-do-don't stop ♪♪

♪♪ Do-do-don't the shamrock ♪♪

♪♪ Yo, do-do-don't ♪♪

♪♪ Do-do-don't stop ♪♪

♪♪ Yo, do-do-don't stop ♪♪

♪♪ Uh-uh ♪♪

♪♪ Yo, rock the shamrock ♪♪

♪♪ Hey, st. Patrick's day ♪♪

♪♪ Hey, st. Patrick's day ♪♪

♪♪ Hey, st. Patrick's day ♪♪

|Áo, st. Patrick's day ♪♪

♪♪ Hey, st. Patrick's day ♪♪

♪♪ Hey ♪♪

Whoo! December !

[Bells ringing]

Christmas!

h* h* h*!

Yo, whassup?

It's me, st. Nick.

[Bells]

Get it, the santa claus thing?

Well, you know, most santa clauses you see in the mall

And everything, they all right.

But all kids can't get to the mall.

So I thought I'd go out to the people.

I don't really have a sleigh or anything like that,

So...guess I'll just get on the city bus.

h* h*!

Let's see what some of these kids in the city

Want for christmas.

Now what you want for christmas?

A moped.

A moped.

Ooh, girl, have you been good enough for a moped?

Oh, yeah.

Ok. I'm just making sure.

I don't know if a moped is in my budget,

'Cause you see I'm on the bus.

Don't you think if I could make mopeds happen,

I would be on a moped right now?

Yeah.

I wouldn't be on the bus.

Now what is it that you want for christmas?

I want a boyfriend.

She want a boyfriend.

Daddy, what do you think about that?

You doing anything for the rest of the year?

No.

Maybe you can be, like, one of my elves.

I'll put on some ears wear that hat,

Suit and all.

All right, cool. My elf, this is my elf right here.

[Bells]

Don't trust the santas at the mall.

You know, they're not real.

I'm the real st. Nick.

You know, they're all jolly and happy...

How you gonna be jolly and happy

If you gotta deliver presents all year?

That's not true.

They only give me the sleigh

One night out of the year.

The rest of the time I'm on the bus.

When you go there and you see them fake santas,

Tell them the real st. Nick said, "quit faking the front."

[Bells]

Tell me what you want.

Uh...a swimming pool.

We got any workers that can build a pool?

Well, about elves can build a pool.

I might be able to make that swimming pool thing happen for you, player.

These people want a lot, ain't that right?

It's expensive.

Expensive, man.

And you know, I find it very ironic

That I've been sitting on the bus

And ain't nobody asked for a transfer.

[Bells]

Thanksgiving day.

Turkey time.

Yo, since I'm taking over the holidays,

I figure, hey, thanksgiving time is a great time...

[Watch beeps]

Uh-oh.

My alarm's going off.

You know what that means.

Time for cannon to go off.

Oh, yeah! Oh, yeah!

Oh, yeah!

Whoo! Holidays!

♪♪ Nick cannon ♪♪

♪♪ Ni-ni-ni-nick cannon, nick cannon ♪♪

♪♪ Ni-ni-ni-nick cannon, nick cannon ♪♪

All right, april .

April fool's.

Aprl fo's!

Man, I love this holiday.

Now it's time to recruit some fools off the street

With some foolish tongue twisters.

Oh, this is gonna be fun.

Now let me hear you say "toy boat" times fast.

Toy boat, toy boat, toy boat, toy bu-- hee hee!

What about "unique new york."

Unique new york, n--unique you nor--

I can't do it!

Unique new york, unique new york,

Unique new no--york

"New nork." I've never been to "new nork."

Nu-ique-- nu-ique--

Unique new york, nu-ique new york,

Nunique new york.

You ain't even gonna try to get it right, huh?

Unique new york, unique new york,

Unique new york.

Yeah!

Ex-disc jockey.

Ex-disc jockey, ex-disc jockey,

Ex-disc jockey, ex-disc jockey.

A knapsack strap.

A knapsack strap, a knaksack strap...

Knaksack strak.

April fool's, I got you.

You just foolish as I am.

Because I can't say it either.

All right, good job.

♪♪ Ni-ni-ni-nick cannon, nick cannon ♪

The fourth of july.

Independence day.

It's franc to theáspunkle,

But right now you can call me spunkle sam!

'Cause my man nick is takin' over the holidays.

So watch out for fourth of july!

Let freedom bling!

I'm so patriotic. I'm like melágibson.

I'm the patriot.

Hold it down! This is my fourth of july parade.(

I'm littleálate, I know. So what?

Thanks a lot.

Brooklyn!

Hey! There we go!

Here, son.

Thank you!

There you go! It's all for you!

Representin'. Spunkle sam loves you!

Yeah, money!

Spunkle, yeah!

Uh-oh, work it.

Spunkle got another one.

They lovin' me, b.

Ah+ let meáseeáyou shake it, baby!

Yeah!

Yo! I'm gonna read you your bill on rights

Yohve...

Ney.

Yog..

Hold it down!

Honk if you hear me!

[Cars honking]

♪♪ And the home of the...boys ♪♪

Yeah, sam, take it.

[Soñndáf ownchomrino]

All right, I came to the conclusion

That all the holidays are perfectly fine right where they are.

Except...

There's space for one more.

Are you guys ready for the new holiday?

Yeah!

All right, it's time for me to reveal...

Cannon day, baby!

Y'all give it up for cannon day! Yeah!

[Kids cheer]

It's a wonderful day.

It's when everybody wears their hats backwards,

Gets everything free from the stores,

And kids can do whatever they want!

Are you guys with that?

Yeah!

All the candy you want to eat?

Yeah!

All the free presents that you get to pick?

Yeah!

Come on, yeah! Go!

[All singing]

♪♪ Ain't no party like a nick cannon party ♪♪

♪♪ 'Cause a nick cannon party don't stop ♪♪

♪♪ Ain't no party like a nick cannon party ♪♪

♪♪ 'Cause a nick cannon party don't stop ♪♪

♪♪ Do my ladies take this party over ♪♪

♪♪ Oh, yeah ♪♪

♪♪ Or do my dogs take this party over ♪♪

♪♪ Oh, yeah ♪♪

Sing it!

♪♪ Ain't no party like a nick cannon party ♪♪

♪♪ 'Cause a nick cannon party don't stop ♪♪

♪♪ Ain't no party like a nick cannon party ♪♪

♪♪ 'Cause a nick cannon party don't stop ♪♪

Y'all, I just want to thank everybody

For helping me take over the holidays.

It was a great episode.

I had a whole lot of fun

And I hope you all did at home.

A'ight, holla back next time.

Nick cannon taking over.

Cannon day, baby.

Let's do it. Everybody scream!

Aaahhhh!

Yo, let your balloons go!

Oh, yeah!

[Kids singing theme song]

Nick, stop playing!

Get your fingers out of my cake!

What's wrong with you?

Thought she was frozen.

We takin' over.