02x08 - This Week's Guest

[bunniefuu]

[SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC PLAYING]

- [CHAIR RATTLES]
- This is how we're gonna die.

- What do we do? Do we pray?
- I don't know. Do you believe in God?

I think so. I think right
now I believe in God.

I can't believe I'm not gonna
live to see what Jack becomes.

The last picture I took was of Jack's
taint 'cause he had a rash on it.

- Can you imagine how I feel right now?
- It doesn't matter.

Nothing matters right now except us
spending our last moments together.

Don't say that!

- I love you.
- I love you too.

I've been wanting to tell
you something for a while,

and this is probably the best
time to do it. [EXHALES HEAVILY]

The sweatpants/cargo
pants you thought you lost,

I threw them away months ago.

- I couldn't understand them.
- It's okay.

- I couldn't look at them anymore.
- [COPYCAT k*ller] Boring!

No one's gonna listen to this for free,

let alone subscribe to Patreon.

- What the f*ck is happening?
- [NATHAN] He's recording us.

- What?
- Why are you recording us?

[COPYCAT k*ller] People
love m*rder podcasts.

So I decided to take it up a notch

and record a real m*rder.

Yours.

[DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYING]

That's it. There's no such
thing as too much syrup.

I'm just gonna go talk to
your mom's friend, okay? Enjoy.

Okay, before you freak
out, I have a plan.

A plan that involves kidnapping my son?

It's not kidnapping. It's
reuniting him with his father.

You just described the vast
majority of kidnappings.

Didn't you say his
grandparents were awful?

I did say they were awful, Tory.

- That doesn't mean you can take him.
- So he's better off with us.

We've always fantasized
about disappearing together,

going to Mexico or wherever.

[PHONES VIBRATING AND BEEPING]

It's just for a kid with brown hair
and brown eyes. It could be anyone.

[TV REPORTER] Breaking news.
Police say they're currently

searching for a 10-year-old boy

who's been missing since
early afternoon today.

Okay, we need to get
the f*ck out of here.

Hey, Ollie. You're gonna love this.

You're not the only one with a plan.

I have to say I really don't think
this is a good idea for a podcast.

Yeah, k*lling people,
that's not entertainment.

[COPYCAT k*ller] Good note. I agree.

So I designed a game to play first.

Do you like quiz shows?

- No.
- Kinda.

- [SIGHS]
- [WEAKLY] No.

[COPYCAT k*ller] I think
you're gonna like this one,

and I suspect you're
gonna be very good at it

because the subject is...

serial K*llers.

We don't wanna play your f*cking game.

Look, we don't want any trouble.
We don't know who you are.

So just let us go right now,
and we won't go to the cops.

We won't. We promise. We won't.

We have a kid. Please.

[COPYCAT k*ller] And if you ever
wanna see your baby Jack again,

you'll play the game.

He knows Jack's name. Oh, my God.

[COPYCAT k*ller] All you have to
do is win, and I'll let you go.

[SIGHS] You do know a
lot about serial K*llers.

Yeah, I know enough to know he
will never f*cking let us go.

That's the actual game, right?

Make us think we have a
chance, and you k*ll us anyway.

[COPYCAT k*ller] You really think
you have me figured out, don't you?

I do have you figured out. I mean,
statistically, you're all the same.

- You're f*cking loser men, who feel invisible...
- Are you kidding me?

... can't get the girl of their
dreams until they discover m*rder.

- We've seen this episode many...
- You're making it worse.

- This is the time to be nice.
- I've watched a lot of "Dateline."

- [DOOR OPENS]
- [GASPS]

[INTENSE, SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC PLAYING]

BASED ON A TRUE STORY

[TOY TRAIN WHISTLE BLOWS SOFTLY]

[DOOR OPENS]

[SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC PLAYING]

Hey.

Can I help you?

Yeah. Is he here?

[WOMAN] He's in the back.

[MOUTHING] What the f*ck?

[QUIETLY] Trust me.

- [THUD]
- [GASPS]

Not who you expected?

No. No, not really.

I thought you said they weren't women.

Not usually women. This is
a very unusual situation.

Um, whoa. Ma'am, lady, girl,

could you tell me who you
are or what's going on?

Uh-uh.

- That's not how it works.
- Oh, my God.

I ask the questions.

- [MOUTHS] What the...
- ... f*ck?

- First question...
- Oh, fun. This is gonna be fun.

How did Robert Durst k*ll
his friend in California?

I... I know this one.

It was a g*n, nine millimeter,
execution style. Simple.

Boom, bam.

- Very good.
- Ha!

- [MOUTHING] Great job.
- That's one point for you.

That's-that's good, so...

- What... What are you...
- What are you doing with that?

- Uh-oh. Oh, my God.
- What are you doing with that?

Oh.

What's going on?

Oh! [CHUCKLES]

What was I thinking?

This is audio.

I've just sliced off one of your
zip ties for getting an answer right.

Get one wrong, and I'll
slice something else.

[SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC PLAYING]

[DOOR OPENS]

Look who's back.

Same as last time?

Uh, no. Uh...

I'm actually gonna need
another two this time as well.

Oh.

[MAN SIGHS]

Sure it's a good idea?

Probably not, no. But...

I'm gonna have to anyway.

Let's get some pictures.

[CAMERA SHUTTER CLICKING]

Next question...

Name one of Jeffrey Dahmer's jobs.

- Chocolatier.
- Really?

Also worked at a deli. Was in
the Army. Was a phlebotomist.

Very impressive.

- Thank you. Thank you.
- Nice job, babe. That was great.

- [SCREAMS]
- [SCREAMS] Oh, my God!

- [SCREAMING]
- But I said "one" of his jobs.

What?! Are you okay?

No. She just stabbed me.

[COPYCAT k*ller] Next question!

Hey. Are you gonna tell
me who that guy was?

Nobody.

He's retired... mostly.

Uh, Ollie, bedtime.

I don't have my pajamas.

Do you live here now?

- What? No, of course not. No.
- [PHONE DINGS]

We, uh, we've got an early flight,
so we're staying at the airport.

Hey, tell ya what. You can
sleep in your uniform tonight.

That'd be fun, right?

- [PHONE DINGS]
- [TYPING]

- Who's texting you?
- It's Serena.

Ava was supposed to pick up Jack
hours ago, but she never showed up.

She's probably just lost
track of time or something.

Yeah.

Yeah, you're right.

- She's obviously stressed right now.
- Yeah.

- [SCREAMS] God!
- Are you f*cking crazy?

What the f*ck? I was right.

The July 4th k*lling of the
Zodiac k*ller was in Vallejo.

I didn't like your tone.

- Are you okay?
- It's not that bad.

f*ck, it's really bad.

- Next question...
- Oh, my God.

How did I tie Carly Warren's hands,

and why?

Uh, okay, that's easy.

It was an inline, double
coin Shibari bondage knot,

which was the MO of the Rosary k*ller.

[PHONE DINGS]

[AVA] Hey, what are
you doing with my phone?

Who's Tory?

She's really blowing you up.

My sister.

[INHALES] This next question should
be easy for an expert like you.

What was the name

of the Westside Ripper's last victim?

- Uh... Okay, I know this.
- You know this.

Uh... I remember this. It was...

[NATHAN] Hold on. She knows it.

- Let me think for a second.
- Tick tock.

- Babe.
- You met her. Can you help me?

- Can't you remember? Come on.
- I don't... It's...

- I don't remember.
- How do you not remember?

Your sister is very persistent.

You know, I think you
should talk to her.

And I think you should tell her...

- [LINE RINGING]
- ... everything's fine.

- [LINE CONNECTS]
- [TORY] Ava? Where the hell are you?

Serena's freaking out. Are you okay?

Yeah. Sorry. I got a little tied up.

I'm, um...

at a yoga class.

[TORY] You're in a yoga class at night?

Serena needs you to pick up Jack.

Yeah, I know. Can I call
you when I'm outta here?

I'm getting weird looks from everyone.

- Um, is that cool, Turtle?
- [TORY] Yeah. I'll talk to you later.

[PHONE BEEPS]

[NEWS REPORT PLAYS OVER TV]

She needs our help.

[MATT] Why? Is she that bad at yoga?

No. She said "turtle."

That's, like, our sister code word.

It's what we use
whenever we're in trouble.

Like, when I was a kid, and a creepy
stranger would try and talk to me,

or when I was in college,
and a creepy stranger

- would try and talk to me.
- Okay, Tory, Tory,

listen to me. Listen to me, all right?

Look, you're the one that
decided to kidnap my son, okay?

So for now, instead of
doing something rash,

like running off to rescue her,

I-I think we should
just stick to the plan.

Okay.

- Yeah, you're right.
- Good.

No. But she's always had
my back. I owe this to her.

Listen to me.

Even if you could help her,
you don't know where she is.

- [RATTLING]
- What the hell was that?

[SIGHS] It's just the
ice machine. Come here.

[TORY SIGHS]

All right.

[TENSE MUSIC PLAYING]

You must recognize this instrument.

Yeah. It's a 14-inch Bowie knife.

Which is the weapon of choice
for one particular serial k*ller.

- What's his name again?
- Westside Ripper.

So that just rolls right off the tongue,

but you can't tell me the
name of one of his victims

in your own backyard?

Okay, I used to know a lot
about his kills, all right,

and then you came along,
kinda stole the spotlight.

So, forgive me. Just
give me a f*ck' second.

You've got 10 seconds. Then
we'll have to cut to commercial.

Okay, she's a bartender.
Doesn't that give me any points?

After I k*ll you both, we'll
hear from today's sponsor,

Snowfall Mattresses, the
only mattress that's...

That's it. Snowfall
Mattresses. That's it!

Oh, I'm sorry, but that's incorrect.

Shut the f*ck up and let me finish.

You k*lled Clark Miller. He's
the CEO of Snowfall Mattresses.

They're, like, the biggest
advertisers in the true crime space.

Your victim, Wendy
Jenkins, reported on crime,

and Dr. Friedman wrote
a book on serial K*llers,

and we did a podcast with one, sadly,

and the Lipinski sisters... Well, duh.

And Jared Leto, he played
the guy who k*lled Lennon.

That's it!

All these people
profited off true crime.

That's your motive.
That's why you chose them.

[MUSIC BUILDS]

Wow, Ava.

- [CHUCKLES]
- [COPYCAT k*ller] I'm impressed.

- Nice.
- You figured it out.

You figured out why I target

sick, twisted, pathetic people like you,

who enjoy listening
to other people's pain.

Okay, I hate to break it to you,

but people have been telling
scary stories around the campfire

since the start of f*cking people.

Stories make it easier to deal

with a f*cked-up, terrifying world,

a world where a girl can go in for
her bartending shift and get k*lled.

Chloe Lake! That's her name.

- [NATHAN] Chloe Lake. Yes.
- [AVA] You didn't know it.

- I got it. Chloe Lake.
- Yes, you got it. Nice.

That's who...

Did you know her?

[SOMBER MUSIC PLAYING]

She was my sister.

[INHALES SHARPLY] Oh, my God.

Okay.

I am so sorry.

No, you're not.

Yes, we are. Yes.

No. No. Everyone...

Everyone says that they are.

But nobody means it.

No. Nobody gives a sh*t.

[SNIFFS]

I mean, her picture was on the news,

and... there was a vigil or two.

And then...

the reporters and the
podcasters started swooping in,

and then nobody talked
about Chloe anymore.

All they talked about
was the Westside Ripper

and how she fit into his master plan.

Okay, well, k*lling more
people is not gonna help.

- This is not gonna bring her back.
- No, she's right, Ava.

Sorry. What was that?

Just listen to me.

You're right. It's bullshit, all of it.

So forget about the Westside Ripper.

You could change the narrative
right here, right now.

I mean, you're already recording us.

Tell us about Chloe.

Tell the whole world about Chloe.

[SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC INTENSIFIES]

Okay, I got the flight
details. We're good to go.

Wanna pack up? I'll wake
Ollie up in a second.

Yeah.

Where are my AirPods?
Ava always steals my sh*t,

and she doesn't give it back.

Wait. I think that's how I can find her.

Hold on.

[SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC PLAYING]

"Endgame Studios." Isn't
that a podcasting place?

These people and their f*cking podca...

- Wait.
- [SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC PLAYING]

What did you say it was called?

Endgame Studios.

Why? What is it?

GOT YOUR MESSAGE. HERE'S
MINE. ENDGAME. I WIN.

You know what, Tore? You're right.

If you're concerned about her,
I should go check in on her.

I mean, we got the time, right?

Keep an eye on Ollie.
I'll be right back.

- What if he wakes up, and he's scared?
- He's gonna be fine, Tore.

- You can't...
- I'll be quick.

You can't leave me with
him like this. You...

[COPYCAT k*ller] Ah.
But she was determined

to make me breakfast in bed.

Only she was six years old,

so the pancakes were
burnt on the outside

and liquid on the inside. [LAUGHS]

And, uh, the syrup she brought me,

it was actually ketchup. [LAUGHS]

And our parents, right away, they
said, "Nope. No way. No pets."

And you know what? Instead
of crying or complaining...

[CHUCKLES] ... she took all
the hair out of her hairbrush,

stuck googly eyes on it...

- [SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC PLAYING]
- ... and named it Dennis. [LAUGHS]

But she was the only one

who was small enough to
fit through the window.

So we decided to bring her, and...

[INHALES] ... that was a mistake,

a big one.

[BLADE CLINKS]

Oh, my God. What happened?

What happened next?

Well, she-she made it
up the side of the house,

but she was wearing UGGs, and...

[SIGHS] This is hard.

No. Uh, don't stop. Was she okay?

Yes. Yeah.

Uh, luckily, a rose bush broke her fall.

Her arms were so scratched up.

So I had to let her borrow my
favorite Delia's long-sleeve sweater

the rest of the summer.

She sounds just like my sister.

Fearless, and it's beautiful,

but sometimes she also
gets in over her head,

and it... can be kinda scary.

Dad? Dad?!

Hey, Ollie. Your dad's
gonna be back soon, okay?

With my medicine?

- Your medicine?
- Every day, I need my asthma medicine.

He's picking it up, right?

Um...

I don't... I don't know.

[SOMBER MUSIC PLAYING]

It never goes away.

Even after they're gone.
I'm still her sister.

The only one who cares...

who remembers.

[ELECTRICITY POWERS DOWN]

[METALLIC CREAKING]

[THUD]

[CLATTERING]

[CLATTERING]

Matt?

You made it!

All this closure, I
almost forgot about you.

[METALLIC CLATTERING]

So...

it's you.

- Disappointed?
- No. I'm impressed.

I respect your craft.

"Endgame."

Nice. I-it took me a
second, but I figured it out.

It took me less than
that to figure you out

after you showed up at my studio
with nothing to say but "I'm sorry."

[CHUCKLES] What was your plan?

[INHALES] You know what? This is crazy,

but, uh, I didn't even have one

if you can believe that.

Well, welcome to the party, Matt.

You know, I was afraid
you weren't gonna show up.

Now, watch me open my first present.

[SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC INTENSIFIES]

All right, what do you want?

[TUTS] Oh, it's so nice of you to ask.

I want a recorded confession
that you m*rder*d my sister.

Matt, please. This is a chance
for you to redeem yourself.

I'm sorry, buddy. That's
just not gonna happen.

- Matt, come on. Are you kidding me? Please.
- Ava. Ava! [SHUSHES]

Look, I've got an even
better pitch for you.

I've already called the cops.

They're gonna be here
in, like, a minute or so.

But I've got a car out back full of cash

and info on people who could
just make you disappear.

Oh.

I don't wanna disappear.

Okay. What do you really want?

[AVA] She wants what everyone wants.

She wants to not feel invisible.

She wants to tell Chloe's story.

Which you have. You did. We all know.

You can walk away from this. Take
what he's f*cking offering you.

Yeah.

I will do that.

- But I'm gonna k*ll you first.
- [AVA] What?!

Hey.

- [GRUNTS]
- [THUD]

- [EXHALES]
- Oh, my...

Babe, that was amazing!
Come here. Untie me.

Holy sh*t. How did you...

When did that even happen?
This is... Come here.

- You okay?
- Get the one... Yes, yes.

- Let me see your hand.
- My hand's fine.

You need a hospital.

This is not good.

[BREATHING HEAVILY] The cops
are coming. What do we do?

I don't know. What do we do?

Was there really money in
that car? What do we do?

Okay. Um...

You're gonna go in there and
tell the nice people who you are,

and they're gonna take you home, okay?

But what about you?

Where are you going?

I'm... I'm gonna...

go home, too.

Don't worry about me. Okay?

Go ahead.

[SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC PLAYING]

[LINE RINGING]

- Hey, it's Ava. Just text me.
- [VOICEMAIL BEEPS]

Hey, Ava.

Um...

I don't know when you're
gonna hear this, but...

when you do...

turtle.

[SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC CONTINUES]

[NATHAN] Is she dead?

She's not dead.

She's out, but there's a pulse.

And I'll tell you what you're gonna do.

You're gonna do nothing.

Nothing? Oh. Okay.
We're gonna do nothing.

- That's great. That's a good plan.
- [GLOVE SNAPS]

What are you doing
with those gloves, pal?

You know, it's funny.

A year ago,

this would've been easy.

[METALLIC CLINK]

Like Christmas come early.

I k*ll you both.

Plant the hatchet on her.

Make my escape.

But that's not you anymore.

- That's not...
- You've found friendship and a new lease on life.

And love. Tory.

We-we've accepted you
into our family, Matt.

- It's different now.
- [NATHAN] You're a friend, right?

[MATT] Yeah, but, uh...

If I'm honest with myself,

I am just so tired.

I am tired of lying.

I am tired of pretending
to be something I'm not.

I mean, it's no fun anymore.

[EERIE, GENTLE MUSIC PLAYING]

It's time.

It's time to hand myself in.

Go ahead, Nathan. Take it.

I'm gonna go to the police, and
I'm gonna tell them everything.

I'm gonna tell them about the murders.

I'm gonna tell them
where all the evidence is.

I'm gonna tell them that I
made you guys do the podcast.

You're gonna be free.

I mean, it was inevitable. It
was always gonna end this way.

At least like this, I get
to do it on my own terms.

[INHALES DEEPLY]

With my head held high.

[SOLEMN MUSIC PLAYING]

[SIRENS IN DISTANCE]

[SIRENS IN DISTANCE]

[NATHAN SIGHS]

You ready?

Yeah.

- Hands in the air!
- The Copycat k*ller's inside!

Move! Let's move!

Move! Move! Move! Go! Go! Go! Go!

- [INDISTINCT SHOUT]
- Go! Go! Go!

- Clear!
- [MUSIC BUILDS SLOWLY]

Clear.

[INTENSE SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC PLAYING]

Clear.

f*ck, that's a lot of blood.

Multiple fatalities.

Empty. Nobody's here.

Nathan Bartlett, you are
under arrest for m*rder.

- I didn't do anything.
- No, no, no. You got the wrong guy.

Matt, tell 'em that...

- Matt? Where the f*ck is Matt?!
- You have the right to remain silent.

Anything you say can and will be
held against you in a court of law.

- Matt!
- You have the right to an attorney.

If you can't afford one,
one will be appointed to you.

Do you understand the
rights as I have read them?

You don't mind if I store
some incriminating evidence

in your private storage locker, right?

Yeah, let's go ahead and plant
a bunch of DNA in your Jeep.

Go ahead, Nathan. Put your
fingerprints on the hatchet.

What are you gonna do, turn me in?

Do whatever you want.
I don't care anymore.

["BOOMERANG" BY YEBBA PLAYING]

- Easy. Ava.
- [AVA] Babe, I'm right here. It's okay.

We're gonna fight this, okay?

[NATHAN GRUNTS]

It's okay. Hey, we're gonna fight this.

- Get me outta here.
- I will. I will. It's gonna be okay.

- [SONG ENDS ABRUPTLY]
- [BLADES THRUMMING SOFTLY]

[INHALES, GASPS]

Are you feeling any better?

[GASPS SOFTLY]

- [ROPES STRETCHING]
- [MATT] I hope so.

'Cause we got a lot to talk about.

[SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC PLAYING]

[SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC CONTINUES]

[MUSIC ENDS]