01x20 - The Hatter Who Came to Dinner

[bunniefuu]

[upbeat music playing]

"The time has come," the Walrus said,

"To talk of many things:

Of shoes--and ships--and sealing-wax--

Of cabbages--and kings--"

Learning this poem by heart is so hard.

If only I hadn't left memorizing it
to the last minute.

Maybe I should stay home from school.
I could tell them I'm not feeling well.

It's true. Sort of.

My throat is pretty raspy
after all this reciting.

-[meows]
-All right, I'll keep trying.

"The time has come," the Walrus said,

"To talk of many things:

Of shoes and... And..."

Oh, I can't remember what. [sighs]

I think I'll come back
to this poem in a little while.

[mystical music playing]

[theme music playing]

♪ Hold on to your seat
Let's go for a ride ♪

♪ Now that we're here
On the other side ♪

♪ Use your imagination
And you'll understand ♪

♪ It's an adventure in Wonderland ♪

♪ Every day it's something new ♪

♪ With music, rhyme, and a dance or two ♪

♪ It's a curious place
With a wonderful crew ♪

♪ And you're never quite sure
What they will do ♪

♪ Use your imagination
You'll understand ♪

♪ It's an adventure in Wonderland ♪

♪ Adventure in Wonderland ♪

♪ Adventure in Wonderland ♪

Trim a little off the left side.

More. More. More.

Stop! Too much.

Oh, now you'll have to take some
off the right side to make it even.

Sorry, Your Majesty. My fault entirely.

-Oh!
-[Mad Hatter & Hare] Not.

Uh, Hatter, I can't tell you
how I appreciate your doing this for me.

I do so dislike climbing ladders.
[chuckles]

Fear of heights, you know.

Oh, Alice.

Tell me, is my topiary even?

Yes, I think so.

[chuckles] Not my hair, my topiary.

You know,
shrubbery trimmed in special shapes.

Like this one. It's a, uh, cube.

Yeah, and in a cube, the length,
depth and height are all the same.

-[Rabbit] Yes.
-Well, in that case,

yes, your topiary looks fine to me.

-Oh.
-Great. All finished.

Wait! You need to snip one last branch.

Uh, see it? The one above the Hare's ear.

-What? Where? The Hare...?
-That's it! That's it!

Very well, then, Your Majesty,
but I'm starting to feel like a pretzel.

Boy, I feel like a pretzel myself.

All this hard work
certainly builds up an appetite.

-[bones pop]
-[Mad Hatter yelping]

[groaning]

Oh, I think my sacroiliac popped out.

I don't see it anywhere.

What does a sacroiliac look like?

No, it's his back.
He means he's hurt his back.

[Hare grunting & Mad Hatter groaning]

[yelping]

Whoa!

Can you straighten up?

No.

Can you walk?

Well...

barely.

Can you do a double reverse somersault
with a half twist?

I don't think so.

Boy, you are hurt.

-[Hare & Rabbit speaking indistinctly]
-[Mad Hatter yelping]

[Rabbit] Right there. Right there.

[Mad Hatter groaning]

Whoa!

Uh-- Oh, well, that's enough
shrub trimming for today, Hatter.

You go on home
and rest that sacroiliac of yours.

Righty-o, I'll just head on-- Oh! Oh!

-Oh, poor Mr. Hatter.
-Oh, dear.

Your Majesty, uh, we really can't have
the Hatter walking all the way home.

We should put him up here
in the palace till he feels better.

We should do what? Who says?

Oh, I-- Uh, but he really can't walk,
Your Majesty.

And it's partly my fault.

I feel just terrible he was hurt
while helping me do my job.

Well, if he was helping you,
why does he have to stay in my palace?

[Rabbit spluttering]

-Hello.
-Hi.

Your Majesty,
even though he was helping me,

he was also working for you.

-Oh, well, I suppose you're right.
-Yes.

-In the line of duty and all that.
-Yes, ah, ah.

Uh, you just rest and be our guest.

[jazzy music playing]

♪ Well, if the Hatter needs a rest ♪

♪ After stretching quite a stretch ♪

♪ While trimming the topiary
To look the very best ♪

♪ Be our guest ♪

♪ Have that rest ♪

♪ And if you need anything
Anything at all ♪

♪ Ask the Rabbit ♪

♪ We've got some comfortable cushions ♪

♪ To cushion the back ♪

♪ Mm, good for any sacroiliac-
Type attack ♪

♪ I hope not too much is really wrong ♪

♪ I know you won't have to stay
Very long ♪

♪ So have a rest ♪

♪ Be our guest ♪

♪ And if you need anything
Anything at all ♪

♪ Ask the Rabbit ♪

Thank you, Your Majesty.

I'd like to shake your hand.

-[bones cracking]
-Oh!

Unfortunately, I can't reach that high.

Here you go, Mr. Hatter.

Oh, you're all so kind.

I promise you won't even know I'm here.

I'll be quiet as a dormouse.

-[bones crack]
-[groaning]

I hope you feel better soon.

Now, then, Rabbit, let's go.
You have work to do.

Oh, ye-- Ye-- Oh!

I almost forgot.
If you need anything else,

just ring this little bell,
and I'll be right there.

Ah-ah-ah, unless, of course,
he's busy doing something for me.

Naturally. You won't hear a peep
from me unless it's very important.

Would you like me to stay
and keep you company?

No, no, you run along. I'll just rest.

Ah, fine. Goodbye, Alice.

-Rabbit, come along.
-Yes, Your Majesty.

Now, then. The next order of business
is the window washing.

-Window washing.
-After which you'll pick up the groceries.

-Groceries-- Oops.
-[bell rings]

The Hatter must need me.
I'll be right back.

-You rang?
-Yes.

So sorry to bother you,
but I can't quite reach this pillow.

-Aw.
-[Rabbit] No trouble at all.

-There you are.
-Oh, that's swell.

Sorry, Your Majesty.

You were saying?

Uh, yes.

-First you need to clean the windows.
-Windows.

-Pick up a few groceries.
-Groceries.

-And shine my shoes.
-Shoes.

-[bell rings]
-Wait! There's the Hatter again.

I'll just be a moment.

Yes? Is something wrong?

So terribly sorry to bother you yet again,

but I'm afraid this tea has grown cold.

Oh. No problem. I'll get you a fresh pot.

Wait, I can see you're already busy.
I'll just get it mys--

-[bones crack]
-[groaning]

Nonsense. Nonsense.

You sit back and relax.

Don't move a muscle. I'll take care of it.

Ah. Well, thanks.

His tea is cold.

I thought he was only going to ring
if it was important.

Well, Your Majesty, no one
really likes their hot tea to be cold.

If he were drinking iced tea,
that would be different,

since it's supposed to be cold.

But hot tea really ought to be hot.

-I remember once on a Sunday--
-Rabbit!

Oh! Right. Won't be a moment.

[wheels screeching]

[bell rings]

Back in a jiffy.

-[whistles]
-Oh! There's the queen.

I'd better run.

[wheels screech]

Rabbit, this has got to stop!

There is work to be done,

and I am sick
of being interrupted by that stupid...

-[bell rings]
-Oh.

...bell!

Your Majesty, please keep in mind,
the Hatter's injury was partly our fault.

I mean, he was trimming
your topiary bushes for me.

Ugh. It may be our fault,
but it's your problem,

-and I expect you to get your work done...
-[bell ringing]

...even if the Hatter is in your hair.

[Red Queen huffs]

[bell continues ringing]

Oh. [chuckles]

Oh. [chuckles]

Ah.

So nice of you to share your bed with me.

I wasn't up to that long walk home.

Oh, nonsense.

Mine is the best mattress in the palace.

Oh. Yeah, it's terrific.

Yes. It's good for your back.

Besides, there's--
There's plenty of room for two.

And it's a good thing too, because...

[yawning]

...I need some sleep.

[grunting]

[sighing]

[yawns]

Mmm...

Care for a crumpet?

Actually, no, thank you.

I don't like crumbs in the... bed.

Oh. Where would you like the crumbs?

[sighs, then grunts]

-All right. Your bed, your rules.
-Thank you.

Good night.

Oh. Good night.

[sucking teeth]

Um... what are you doing?

Hmm?

Oh. Reading a book. Why?

I can't sleep with the light on.

Oh.

Well, then would you like
to borrow a book? I have an extra.

No, no. I don't want a book.
I want to sleep.

Oh, yes.
Well, it is getting late, isn't it?

-Yes, yes, it is.
-Yeah. Okay.

Good night.

Good night.

Brr!

Gosh, it's cold in here, isn't it?

Yeah.

-Yes, it is cold in here, Hatter.
-Yeah.

If you don't mind,
we'll just share the covers.

Well, yeah, sure, I don't mind. No.

-Good night.
-Night.

[zany music playing]

Oh! Oh! Ow, ow, ow.

-Yes. Good night.
-Yeah. Good night.

Good night.

Oh-- Ooh.

-Sweet dreams.
-Yeah.

-Sleep tight, now.
-Yes, thank you.

[both sighing]

[laughing]

That's it!

That's the last straw!

-Hatter, I've had a--
-[snoring]

Hatter, I--

Hatter?

[continues snoring]

Oh, never mind.

At least I can have the floor to myself.

[playing pasodoble music]

Olé.

[Rabbit groaning]

Rabbit, you seem to be
dragging your tail today.

-What's wrong?
-I'm tired.

These tea bags and crumpets
for the Hatter weigh a ton.

Since when do you work for the Hatter?

Since yesterday.

I mean, why are you working for him?

Well, yesterday he hurt his sacroiliac

while helping me
trim the queen's shrubbery.

So now he's staying at the palace
until he's well enough to go home.

It was nice of you to put him up.

Oh, putting him up was easy.

It's putting up with him
that's the problem.

He's got me waiting on him hat and foot.

Why don't you simply ask him to leave?

Oh. I don't think
his back's well enough for him to walk.

Besides, it might hurt his feelings
to tell him to go.

It's bad enough he's hurt his back.

I don't want to have to hurt
his feelings as well.

You know,
your predicament reminds me of a story.

No.

Mm.

Once there was a dinosaur
who loved to munch on trees.

Pines, palms, oaks and elms.

He was a regular tree gourmet.

But one day, after the dinosaur
ate a forest for a midday snack,

he ended up with a tree branch
stuck between his teeth.

He didn't know it was there,

and his friends were too polite
to tell him.

Later that day, the dinosaur went
to get his driver's license.

He passed the test with flying colors.

But when it was time
to get his picture taken...

he still had the branch
stuck in his teeth.

And still, everyone was too polite
to say anything.

So when his license came in the mail,
he was horrified.

The picture was terribly embarrassing.

But there was nothing he could do,

because the license didn't expire
until he became extinct.

Yes, I get the idea.

I'd be doing the Hatter a favor

by telling him
what a pain in the neck he is.

Uh, something like that.

Uh, so are you going to do it?

Well, um...

Well, I-- I-- Uh...

I just couldn't.

After all, he was filling in for me.

Besides, I'm sure
he won't be much more of a bother.

[chuckles]

[quirky music playing]

[slurping]

Will you stop that infernal ringing?

Sorry, Your Majesty.

I was just wondering,
could I get another glass of orange juice?

[splutters] Where's the Rabbit?
Why can't he do it?

Oh, he's not back yet.

Back? Back from what?

From the errands I sent him to do.

Errand--? All right, give me your glass.

Ah. Thanks a lot.

Ah.

Why, Your Majesty,

how nice to see you
serving the Hatter like that.

I'm not serving him.

Of course not.
You just happened to be nearby.

Yeah, too near.

Uh... [chuckles]

-So, Hatter.
-Yeah?

Uh, how much longer
do you think you'll be staying with us?

Oh, not much longer, I'm sure.

-Couple of days.
-Mm-hm.

-Perhaps a week.
-Hmm?

-Certainly no more than a month or two.
-[gasps]

Um, a month?

[splutters]

[huffs] I'm going out to find the Rabbit.

If you need anything,
the Cat can get it for you!

[Cheshire Cat laughs]

This setup's really the cat's meow.

Yeah, it's not bad.

The food's great, the bed is comfortable,

and the service is terrific.

Even if the help
gets a bit cranky sometimes.

[laughs] Gee, I never knew
a bad back could be good luck.

-[laughs]
-Huh.

-I guess I am a lucky dog, aren't I?
-[laughs]

Hmm. I wouldn't put it like that.

-Why, Hare, good morning.
-Hello, Hatter.

I brought someone to see you.

I've been a mighty lonely mouse
without you around the house.

I've missed you too, Dormouse.

Boy, you've got
all the comforts of home here, don't you?

Ah, sure, it's great.

But to tell you the truth, the queen
could use a few lessons in tea making.

You've got the queen making tea for you?

That's right.

In fact, you might say
I'm getting the royal treatment.

[upbeat folk music playing]

♪ Got myself a good thing ♪

♪ I like it here a lot ♪

♪ I get the royal treatment ♪

♪ They give me all they've got ♪

♪ I ring the bell ♪

♪ And life is swell ♪

♪ They bring me tea and crumpets ♪

♪ I don't have to do a thing ♪

♪ They open up the window ♪

♪ So I can hear the songbirds sing ♪

♪ I ring the bell ♪

♪ And life is swell ♪

♪ Accidents will happen ♪

♪ Things can go astray ♪

♪ If it weren't for my misfortune ♪

♪ I would not be here today ♪

♪ Oh, got myself a good thing ♪

♪ I like it here a lot ♪

♪ I get the royal treatment ♪

♪ They give me all they've got ♪

♪ I ring the bell ♪

♪ And life is swell ♪

♪ A-boom, bah-bah-doo-bee ding-dong ♪

Hatter, you're back to normal!

I don't know about that,
but his back is fine.

Why, yes, I suppose you're right.

My back is feeling better.

-[Hare laughing]
-h*, h*! Oh, well.

Um... if you're feeling better,
shouldn't you go home?

Are you kidding?

Now that my back has stopped hurting,
I can really enjoy myself around here.

-I suppose you're right.
-Yeah.

Mind if the Dormouse and I stay with you?

Not at all. My palace is your palace.

[both laugh]

Yeah!

I feel so bad for the Hatter,

all alone in that big old palace.

And with a sore sacroiliac too.

[Dee & Dum] Ooh.

Well, this get-well card
will make him feel better.

"To the Hatter: Get well soon."

Harrumph!

It should say
"Get well soon, and hurry up about it."

Hello, Your Majesty. What brings you
into our neck of the woods?

I'm looking for the White Rabbit.

Sorry, we haven't seen him.

-Don't you know which way you sent him?
-I didn't send him anywhere.

He's running errands
for that troublesome--

Um, I mean, uh, for my guest, the Hatter.

Good day.

Gee, she doesn't seem too happy
about having the Hatter around the house.

You know the queen.

She's used to having
that palace to herself.

Well, let's bring this card to the Hatter.

I hope in some small way
it can help cheer him up.

Yeah.

[scatting]

Oh, hi. Cheerio.

Hatter, you're up and around.

-Fit as a fiddle.
-Back on your feet.

That's right.
You can't keep a good Hatter down.

So, what brings you here?

Well, we brought you a get-well card.

Only it looks like we're a little late.
You've obviously already gotten well.

Oh, better late than never.

Hey, come on in!

I was just returning from the kitchen
with a few of the queen's cherry tarts.

-The queen's cherry tarts?
-Yeah.

Doesn't she mind?

She's never said so.

Party!

Whoo!

Rabbit? Oh, Rabbit?

Rabbit!

[voice echoing]

Oh, this is ridiculous.

That rabbit might be anywhere
in Wonderland.

In fact, he might have already
gone back to the palace,

and I wouldn't even know it.

Crystal, could you please show me
the palace security cameras?

[beeping]

Okay, nothing there.

Now let me see the throne room.

Hmm. No bunny in sight.

Wait.

That looked like the Hatter.

I thought his back was too sore
for him to walk around.

[Rabbit grunting and stumbling]

Oh, there you are.
Where have you been all morning?

Well, first I had to drop off
some tea bags,

then pick up a crate of crumpet mix.

Now I'm picking up a shipment of hats.

Oh! Oh! Oh!

And now I'm dropping them.

And you're leaving them there too.

The Hatter is perfectly capable
of picking them up himself.

But what about his sore sacroiliac?

Just look.

[Red Queen chuckles]

Ah. He certainly isn't having any trouble
carrying a tray full of my tarts.

[huffs]

Sore sacroiliac indeed.

Come, Rabbit.

[rumba music playing]

[all] Limbo!

♪ How low can you go? ♪

I don't know.

♪ How low can you go? ♪

I'll try.

♪ How low can you go? ♪

-[Dee & Dum laughing]
-Hey, not bad, huh?

-That was low.
-Watch this.

Forward handspring
with a double twist ending in a backflip.

-[Dum chortles]
-Hare.

[Hare paying drumroll]

[Hatter, Dee & Dum gasp]

Your Majesty, uh, fancy meeting you here.

You mean in my palace? Hmm?

Feeling better?

Yes.

Thanks to your incredible hospitality.

I'm like a new Hatter.
I don't know how I can thank you.

I'll think of something.

And as for the rest of you--

Oh, well, the important thing
is the Hatter is feeling fine.

-Right?
-All's well that ends well.

-Hey?
-[Mad Hatter & Hare] How true that is.

Well... [chuckles]

Uh, you have to admit,

the Hatter's recovery
certainly is worth celebrating, eh?

After all, I bet no one's happier
than you that he's back on his sacroiliac.

[upbeat pop music playing]

♪ Dear queen, I think you fail to see ♪

♪ This joyous opportunity ♪

♪ His mended sacroiliac ♪

♪ Means that he'll be off your back ♪

♪ He's back
On his sacroiliac ♪

♪ No more taking up the slack ♪

♪ Rejoice ♪

♪ The Hatter's back is back ♪

♪ So join in the festivity ♪

♪ He's back into activity ♪

♪ And I'm sure he will repay ♪

♪ All the kindness sent his way ♪

♪ He's back
On his sacroiliac ♪

♪ No more taking up the slack ♪

♪ Rejoice ♪

♪ Now things are back on track ♪

♪ He's back
On his sacroiliac ♪

Well, I suppose Alice is right.

The important thing
is that the Hatter is fine again.

And, uh,
since the party has already started,

why not, uh, keep it going?

-Right!
-[all cheer]

Especially when I know
just who I can get to clean up afterward.

Right!

Oh.

[all laughing]

-[Hare] Then let's really make a mess.
-Party.

[mystical music playing]

Well, back to memorizing my poem.

[meows]

You know, Dinah,
I don't think I should fake being sick

to get out of school today.

It's really dishonest.

Besides, how hard
could a little memorizing be?

"The time has come," the Walrus said,

"To talk of many things"

"Talk of many things" is right.

I could tell you about some
really interesting things I've done today.

Okay. After my homework's done.

[theme music playing]

♪ That's all for now
But we'll see you again ♪

♪ Come back real soon
Now that we're all friends ♪

♪ Where every day is something new ♪

♪ With music, rhyme, and a dance or two ♪

♪ Use your imagination
And you'll understand ♪

♪ It's an adventure in Wonderland ♪

♪ Adventure in Wonderland ♪

♪ Adventures in Wonderland ♪